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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2124696 times)

gbrngfol

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6990 on: September 07, 2012, 04:29:56 am »

TREES ARE THE SOURCE OF ALL EVIL!!!!!!
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Berossus

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6991 on: September 07, 2012, 06:47:01 am »

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My son, many speak of the honor in war.
My preferred method is to wait until their back is turned, then impale them with a pike held by someone else.
Preferrably from a distance.

untakenusername

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6992 on: September 07, 2012, 09:49:10 am »

When the dwarven caravan left before they even got to the depot and unpacked.  ???
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Cheesoburgor

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6993 on: September 07, 2012, 04:54:08 pm »

When the dwarven caravan left before they even got to the depot and unpacked.  ???
they got thirsty.
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Im alive again after a 4 year break!

gbrngfol

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My computer breaks down regularly. Duct tape is starting to lose it's charm.

person012345

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6995 on: September 07, 2012, 06:06:17 pm »

It's gotten so bad I have to live off booze IMPORTS. And no large caravans have shown up in nearly a year and what booze we did manage to make got sucked down in less than two weeks. Plus I'm still working out the irrigation thing...

You'd think they'd eat the prepared meals we have nearly 3k of, but noooooooooo "HUR DURRR WE GON' EAT ALL DA BREWBLES."

A goblin kidnapper messed up the kidnapper part of his job description: Stabbed the kid in the face and pussed him off a sheer 4-z drop. Good job idiot.
Just a tip, pig tails are brewable but not edible.
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Mr Space Cat

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6996 on: September 08, 2012, 10:45:32 am »

So I'm getting used to Masterwork DF, it's pretty great.  First Masterwork Fort. I literally just had a small storm of goblin snatchers within our first or second year. One of them managed to lop off not only my war dog sentry's head, but also the head of my only great mason/mechanic, who was loading one of the stonefall traps at the entrance at the time. One swipe with a "Badly made rusty iron silca" and bam, I was down one of our most important dwarves.

It wasn't so much a facepalm as it was a squealing "noooooooooo".
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Sutremaine

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6997 on: September 08, 2012, 11:03:47 am »

Just a tip, pig tails are brewable but not edible.
As is every other underground crop bar pig tails. Sure, plump helmets are the only brewable crop you can grow in winter, but above-ground crops are all growable all year round.

Getting a greenhouse going even on a supportive biome might be tricky if anybody going outside is likely to be attacked. You can dig a moat upwards with two steps. First you dig an up stair, then channel out the tile above it. The floor tile on the surface is channelled as normal, but can't form a ramp because the stair tile won't support it. From there you can turn the area inside the moat into a greenhouse, although you can't do this with enemies in seeing distance. A temporary measure might be to create something like this:

Code: [Select]
level 0
,,,,,
,.,.,
,,,,,
,.,.,
,,,,,

level -1
#####
#<#<#
##>##
#<#<#
#####

level -2
#####
#####
##X## <--fort access
#####
#####
And then remove those up stairs. You get four tiles that are open to the air but with limited visibility, and while ranged attackers can shoot in (based on arena testing) and fliers can either wander in or use it as a shortcut should they get a ground path it's less risky than trying to set up a walled area on the surface itself. Placing it in the middle of the map will make wandering squads less likely to stumble upon it, and placing the open-air tiles so that they're surrounded by trees will cut visibility further. Something's going to find it eventually though, so get the channels covered as soon as it's feasable.

As with mood items, this is one of the things best set up in the first couple of peaceful years.
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Honestly at the time, I didn't see what could go wrong with crowding 80 military Dwarves into a small room with a necromancer for the purpose of making bacon.

Xnidus

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6998 on: September 08, 2012, 02:25:09 pm »

FB kill three dwarfs.

One of the victims are a friend of one of my soldiers, in consequence, this type throw a tantrum, kill a dog and don't eats or drinks. He feels miserable, he hates himself, he hates the life...

And without warning, kills one comrade, nobody see this murder.

Now, the killer are sleeping in his room. He has been happy lately.  ::)
« Last Edit: September 08, 2012, 02:26:43 pm by Xnidus »
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gbrngfol

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6999 on: September 08, 2012, 09:49:16 pm »

Just a tip, pig tails are brewable but not edible.
As is every other underground crop bar pig tails. Sure, plump helmets are the only brewable crop you can grow in winter, but above-ground crops are all growable all year round.

Getting a greenhouse going even on a supportive biome might be tricky if anybody going outside is likely to be attacked. You can dig a moat upwards with two steps. First you dig an up stair, then channel out the tile above it. The floor tile on the surface is channelled as normal, but can't form a ramp because the stair tile won't support it. From there you can turn the area inside the moat into a greenhouse, although you can't do this with enemies in seeing distance. A temporary measure might be to create something like this:

Code: [Select]
level 0
,,,,,
,.,.,
,,,,,
,.,.,
,,,,,

level -1
#####
#<#<#
##>##
#<#<#
#####

level -2
#####
#####
##X## <--fort access
#####
#####
And then remove those up stairs. You get four tiles that are open to the air but with limited visibility, and while ranged attackers can shoot in (based on arena testing) and fliers can either wander in or use it as a shortcut should they get a ground path it's less risky than trying to set up a walled area on the surface itself. Placing it in the middle of the map will make wandering squads less likely to stumble upon it, and placing the open-air tiles so that they're surrounded by trees will cut visibility further. Something's going to find it eventually though, so get the channels covered as soon as it's feasable.

As with mood items, this is one of the things best set up in the first couple of peaceful years.

An alternative that seems to work fine is channeling an area then flooring over it. The underground part will be marked Above Ground Inside Light.
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Bigheaded

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #7000 on: September 09, 2012, 10:45:57 am »

Nope. they just fucking ate them all.

i get this sooooooooooooooo much :P

From the sounds of the response, looks like i'll be planting pig tails, not plump helmets.

But really why do dwarves decide to eat plump helmets when there's like roasts of every variety available to eat? (excluding plump helmet roast, that would be a weird complaint then!?!)
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Dear Urist McStockpileDrone
I just found a barrel which contained a wheelbarrow. Inside the wheelbarrow was another barrel. I don't even understand how that is possible.

Bilanthri

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #7001 on: September 09, 2012, 03:16:35 pm »

Nope. they just fucking ate them all.

i get this sooooooooooooooo much :P

From the sounds of the response, looks like i'll be planting pig tails, not plump helmets.

But really why do dwarves decide to eat plump helmets when there's like roasts of every variety available to eat? (excluding plump helmet roast, that would be a weird complaint then!?!)

I've seen this happen when too many dwarves want to eat at once. The first bunch ties up all the prepared food items and then the rest go searching for something else to shove down their craw.
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Ki11aGhost

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #7002 on: September 09, 2012, 04:50:29 pm »

Just spent about 10 minutes wondering why it wouldn't allow me to 'use the world as it currently exists' in world creation before realizing my caps lock was on.
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Morgorin

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #7003 on: September 09, 2012, 06:51:35 pm »

I just discovered that there is a maximum embark size (without crashing).  I spent two days trying to figure out how to fix it, I thought I did something wrong with the mods.  I created a new world, twice.  I also uninstalled and re-installed.   Yep.  -_-'
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Urist McFred cancels these pants: too sexy.

TSTwizby

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #7004 on: September 11, 2012, 12:01:40 am »

Seven Miners, all set to channel out a large rectangle. Somehow there is a cave in, all seven die from shattered skulls. From channeling out one layer down.
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I got a female and male dragon on my embark. I got cagetraps on the exits but im struggling to find a way to make them path into it.
Live bait.
3 dwarfs out of 7 dead so far
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