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[WaffleEggnog]

Dear everyone,

Your all mingling around with the food stockpile right beside you complaining of being hungry. I sence a solution to this problem.....

Your supreme dictator

Dear everyone,

I know your obsesed with running outside like complete derps during a seige and collecting shit, but you will die, and then i cant use you. Thanks.

Your supreme dictator

[DrPoo]

Dear Urist McMiner

Maybe you got taken by a fey mood, and maybe you have really horrible, nonexistant crafting skills. But you could have gotten your ass hauled to the workshop i buildt specially for you instead of hanging out with other dwarfs untill you got melancholic and started mindlessly flabbering around in my fortress.

Your mighty omnipotent overlord

[Garath]

Dear Mr mighty omnipotent overlord,

miners require masons workshops.

Sincerely,

Urist MCMiner2

[Baron Baconeer]

Dear Urist Mcvampire #3.

You may have noticed the fact that unlike in other fortresses in our civilization, we do not tolerate vampires. However, due to the fact that you have not a single working bone in your body and you still continue to hunt trough the fortress, which can only be regarded as highly amusing, we're letting you 'live.'

Integral Helsing, your benevolent mayor.

Addendum: However, please stop collapsing into the beds of the people you're trying to feed on. The farmers do not enjoy the sight of a mutilated vampire lying in their beds after a day of hard work.

[captain proof]

Dear Dwarves,
Even though the wiki says that you will not dump enemy corpses into pits, I really wish you would. There's too many Elf,Kobold, and Goblin corpses cluttering up the courtyard.
Sincerely
Your Runelord

[UmbrageOfSnow]

Dear panic-stricken citizens,

I know the zombie-cat is scary.  And he isn't far from the central stairway.  But that doesn't mean you have to drop everything whenever you hear a tiny croaking "meow" from 30 floors down.  You can still haul the crops to the still, they're on the same floor damnit.  Having to walk past the stairway is no excuse.  Your brave, possibly vampiric, military are sacrificing themselves to keep the undead feline menace contained.  Just take this opportunity to get the crops harvested.  And maybe get those doors installed.

Frustratedly,

Your fearless leader.

[Cobra Sting]

Dear Militia,
If you're going to complain about long patrol duty, PLEASE stop complaining when I take you off duty for the month. Quit your bitching or I'll assign you to permanent patrol duty.

Sincerely, frustrated overlord.

[Vehudur]

Dear Elven warriors,

Please stop complaining about the weather.  This is a rainy tropical swamp.  It's always raining.

If you don't stop complaining, you're going to get permanent patrol duty.

Sincerely,

your druid.

[Splint]

Dear Elven warriors,

Please stop complaining about the weather.  This is a rainy tropical swamp.  It's always raining.

If you don't stop complaining, you're going to get permanent patrol duty.

Sincerely,

your druid.

Your dwarfy elves intriuge me.

[jamesadelong]

Dear Militia,
If you're going to complain about long patrol duty, PLEASE stop complaining when I take you off duty for the month. Quit your bitching or I'll assign you to permanent patrol duty.

Sincerely, frustrated overlord.

I find a combination of patrol duty, guard stationing and then about two months of every year keeps them happy. Especially if theres a waterfall running through the guard station.

[Vehudur]

Dear elves of ForestSteel

Please stop going on break.  Seriously.  It's getting old.

Sincerely,

Your increasingly frustrated druid.

[jaxler]

Dear elves of ForestSteel

Please stop going on break.  Seriously.  It's getting old.

Sincerely,

Your increasingly frustrated druid.

try lava

sincerely,
armork

[Vehudur]

Dear elves of ForestSteel

Please stop going on break.  Seriously.  It's getting old.

Sincerely,

Your increasingly frustrated druid.

try lava

sincerely,
armork

Unfortunately, it's 200z down.  The rooms for the pump stack are only half complete, and construction of the power supply has not yet begun.

[kisame12794]

Dear elves of ForestSteel

Please stop going on break.  Seriously.  It's getting old.

Sincerely,

Your increasingly frustrated druid.

try lava

sincerely,
armork

Nope it's

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

MMMMMMMAAAAAAGGGMAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Yours truly

Necro

[jaxler]

Dear elves of ForestSteel

Please stop going on break.  Seriously.  It's getting old.

Sincerely,

Your increasingly frustrated druid.

try lava

sincerely,
armork

Nope it's

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

MMMMMMMAAAAAAGGGMAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Yours truly

Necro

I wouldn't correct Armok if I where you. also try the Dwarven Water Reactor for all your power needs.

Armok