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[Nyxalinth]

Dear Magma Sea,

Please stop hiding from me.  I'm twenty levels down and still haven't found you.  I neeeeeeed you for my awesome metal and glass industry!  also, to roast goblins.  Come onnnnnnnn...

the sad overseer of Firegears

[GreatWyrmGold]

Akura: Beekeepers will sometimes go stand where a hive used to be, even if someone else already grabbed it. Don't have more than one beekeeper. In fact, avoid beekeeping--it's more work than it's worth, what with needing to make hives, screw presses and jugs (which have no, minimal, and no use outside of beekeeping) and only getting a little alcohol, a tiny bit of cooking material, and some tiny bit more crafting material out of it, as well as needing two completely and one mostly specialized professions to do it, one of which (a completely) the skill level actually matters for.
Also, banning something you wouldn't do just prevents her from making another mandate. Treasure it.

Nyxalinth: Dude, the first cavern layer isn't always within 20 levels. Try looking, oh, 100 down and then complain.

[Clover Magic]

Dear entire military of Cryptclear:

Why in the holy mother of fuck will none of you put on your shoes?  There's forty perfectly good masterwork steel high boots sitting there in the armor stockpile, waiting for you.  It's in your uniform.  None of it's forbidden.  You've managed all the other shiny bits of your uniform.  So why the fuck are all of you so opposed to the boots?  Is there some sort of hippie freedom no-shoes commune going on here that I'm not aware of?

Please put on your boots before those forgotten beasties in the caverns make you wish you had them when they ROT YOUR FEET OFF.

Sincerely,
Overseer of Cryptclear

[Splint]

Dear humans of The Ivory Confederacy,

Those offices are for the sheriff and foreman, not for the average jerkoff to eat in. We have a nice communal inn and dining hall that the woodworkers too the time to build, so eat in there. I had to lock those residences to keep you little morons out there.

And hi, our nation is hemmorraging people right now so get in there, make friends, get hooked up with said friends, AND MAKE WITH THE BABIES. Bushik is starting a party by the well, so he's got the right idea! And he already has a fiance!

Wow. that's a phrase I NEVER thought I'd read come from my keyboard.

Signed,
The Overseer.

[TheDarkStar]

Dear entire military of Cryptclear:

Why in the holy mother of fuck will none of you put on your shoes?  There's forty perfectly good masterwork steel high boots sitting there in the armor stockpile, waiting for you.  It's in your uniform.  None of it's forbidden.  You've managed all the other shiny bits of your uniform.  So why the fuck are all of you so opposed to the boots?  Is there some sort of hippie freedom no-shoes commune going on here that I'm not aware of?

Please put on your boots before those forgotten beasties in the caverns make you wish you had them when they ROT YOUR FEET OFF.

Sincerely,
Overseer of Cryptclear

They could be forbidden, press z -> stocks and check.

Dear Urist McWrestlers,

         Why do you only pick up armor and weapons when no one is attacking? I assign you to a squad in an emergency and tell you to put on steel mail and take a weapon, but you decide to wrestle the goblins to death.

[Clover Magic]

They could be forbidden, press z -> stocks and check.

Nope.  Not forbidden or marked for dumping, fresh off the forge and straight into the stockpile.  All of the military even have the little green checkmarks in their equipment screen saying "I HAS BOOTS!", and like I said, they've put on the entirety of the rest of their uniform.  It's just the boots they refuse to put on.  It's been like a year now since I made the first pairs.  I don't get it.

Edit:
Also, idle dwarves, I know I haven't streamlined the newcomers into labor yet, and since Cryptclear is frozen over all year, I know it's not the most exciting place and so you may be bored.  But please, stop going outside and playing chicken with the zombies.  You may outrun them, but one trip-up is all it takes.

[Splint]

They could be forbidden, press z -> stocks and check.

Nope.  Not forbidden or marked for dumping, fresh off the forge and straight into the stockpile.  All of the military even have the little green checkmarks in their equipment screen saying "I HAS BOOTS!", and like I said, they've put on the entirety of the rest of their uniform.  It's just the boots they refuse to put on.  It's been like a year now since I made the first pairs.  I don't get it.

Edit:
Also, idle dwarves, I know I haven't streamlined the newcomers into labor yet, and since Cryptclear is frozen over all year, I know it's not the most exciting place and so you may be bored.  But please, stop going outside and playing chicken with the zombies.  You may outrun them, but one trip-up is all it takes.

Is it set to replace, or over clothes? thier shoes may be the problem there. But then I'm going to assuming the uniforms are indeed set to replace thier civvie attire, and that they may have messed up while putting something else on.

[Clover Magic]

Is it set to replace, or over clothes? thier shoes may be the problem there. But then I'm going to assuming the uniforms are indeed set to replace thier civvie attire, and that they may have messed up while putting something else on.

Yep.  Whatever, I give up.    They can all get foot-rot for all I care, it's funny but frustrating.

[Splint]

You could try manually assiging them, though that may be tedious. And do they have socks as part of thier uniform? They be refusing to put the boots on because they don't have any unclaimed socks for thier uniforms, though I may be horribly wrong.

[Clover Magic]

You could try manually assiging them, though that may be tedious. And do they have socks as part of thier uniform? They be refusing to put the boots on because they don't have any unclaimed socks for thier uniforms, though I may be horribly wrong.

Nope, no socks, here is my uniform: steel breastplate, mail shirt, helm, gauntlets, greaves, shield, high boots, and steel/silver weapon depending on squad, plus a leather cloak.  Everything is set to replace.

Oh wait, there we go, someone just stuck some boots on.  So apparently they're just lazy fuckers.  Gotta love dwarves.

[Splint]

Face meet desk, desk meet face. Dwarves caused this meeting.

[Clover Magic]

Success!  About damn time.

And to re-rail the thread, one last thing, dear elves:

What the fuck am I supposed to do with a pair of giant lice?

-Cryptclear Overseer

[Splint]

Clearly you have not heard of the magic of the mad butcher.

That's all giant insects are good for anyway...

[Wrex]

Dear Urist Mcthrall: Mind Flayers possess incredible mental faculties, as well as powerful psionic abilities. You do not. Your stupidity has caused you to be filled with high velocity lead projectiles, as well as your new master.


Sincerely, Your former overseer.

[MythagoWoods]

Dear Dwarves of Whipbulwarks,

STOP!
HAVING!
BABIES!

Had I known so many of the female dwarves were so fertile I wouldn't have put in a statue garden and giant meeting hall for you all to mingle in and with.  I had 190 dwarves in Spring.  It's now Summer and I have 225.  The only increase has been babies.  If you don't stop acting like mobile, hairy, alcoholic clown cars soon I will need to cause some unfortunate "accidents" and none of us want that.

-The Angry Babysitter