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Dwarf Fortress => DF Adventure Mode Discussion => Topic started by: Kamamura on July 08, 2014, 08:57:27 am

Title: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Kamamura on July 08, 2014, 08:57:27 am
The pub was old, with blackened floorboards and perpetual smoke haze hanging in the air. It was also empty, with the exception of a single, stoically looking farmer puffing from his pipe.

Urist ExplainedBeard approached the farmer's table and sat down.
"You know," said Urist, "I killed a rabbit in a forest two days of travel from here."
The farmer puffed a few times, obviously unimpressed. "It was inevitable."
"Moreover, when crossing the nearby stream, I challenged and slew Urnon the Umbral Cups of Dusk, a werewolf who took hundreds in his lust of murder."
A few more puffs. "It was his Fate."
"Lastly, when I was sitting down at your table, old man, I slipped a few drops of serpent man venom into your mug of ale."
"Rggghhhh... terrific..."
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: RageBob on July 08, 2014, 10:58:13 am
I decided to make crazy bitch elf with points nothing but sword training, thus making her grandmaster (Ya I regretted that). And I was spawned in a village taken by gobbo bandits. This is the result of finding them.

(http://i.imgur.com/0ImlYjd.png)

There's 5 of them.

Did Toady implemented
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
stalking.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: The W axis on July 08, 2014, 11:14:36 am
(http://i.imgur.com/eSNG2FJ.png)

I stealthed right into the middle of them and they started narrating it to each other.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: My Name is Immaterial on July 08, 2014, 11:27:39 am
This is beautiful. PTW.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Tomcost on July 08, 2014, 11:33:36 am
I have to PTW this
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: TheDorf on July 08, 2014, 11:56:13 am
I agree. This is beatiful. Toady's a freaking artist :'D

PTW. Might contribute in a bit, just about to try it out :)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Kamamura on July 08, 2014, 12:01:37 pm
HAha, Weasel story is hilarious. Another slightly edited story from my adventure:

==============================================================

Ugo MaliceBeards, human outcast and traveller, have been crossing a mountain pass for several days. Tired and dehydrated, his body longed for a proper night's rest and warm food. He was approaching a site that should, according to his maps, contain a dwarven settlement. Ugo expected ramparts, walls, sturdy gates, and watchful patrols, but to his surprise, all he found was a hole in the ground with a ladder. Carefully, he descended the ladder and found himself in a dusty cave, dimly lit with several torches, with a few beds and sparse furniture. A single, healthy and content looking dwarf was sitting at a table carving a figurine from wood.

"Hello, my name is Ugo MaliceBeards. Could you please tell me about your local troubles?"
The dwarf turned his creation in his hands, looking at it from several angles. "Well met, Ugo. We have here ... abductions, night horrors and bandits."
"Tell me about the bandints, then."
"A month ago, Borpo PlasticAxe, bandit leader and heathen, has started to terrorize local people with his band called Romantic Colors."
"And could you tell me where I could find this Borpo, friend?"
"You cannot find him, for he is dead. A troll called Buchu NightCabbage has abducted Borpo three weeks ago, torturing him to death shortly after."
"My blade longs for heroic deeds. Tell me, where could I find this troll Buchu to prove my mettle?"
"You could find him in a nearby forest, he won't put much of a fight."
"Why is that?"
"Two weeks ago, my friend and companion Urist LongBottoms has tracked and killed this monster, whose lust for murder cost lives of hundreds."
"That's excellent news, I would like to meet your friend Urist, commend his bravery and perhaps learn from him about combat."
"I am afraid that is not possible, my friend, for Urist has left this world a week ago. He was killed at midnight in his sleep."
"And pray tell me, who committed this craven murder?"
Suddenly, the torches' flames dimmed a bit, and a chilling breeze blew through the cavern. In a moment of darkness, the eyes of Ugo's host gleamed with red light and he naked his long, white teeth in an ugly smile.
"That is an excellent question, Ugo, I thought you would never ask. It's time I told you about the night horrors that plague this land."
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: monk12 on July 08, 2014, 12:05:27 pm
You: Greetings. My name is Vanod Dikechucked.
The flying silver bolt strikes You in the upper body, tearing the muscle and tearing the left lung through the +iron breastplate+!
You are having trouble breathing!
Gason Suwuwimad, Crossbowman: Ah, hello. I'm Gasom Exitjungles.


I, uh, haven't quite worked out how to tell whether somebody is about to do this, as it has happened a few times now. I assume he was from another site come to harass me.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: palu on July 08, 2014, 12:07:38 pm
PTW
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Cptn Kaladin Anrizlokum on July 08, 2014, 12:16:55 pm
Me - "I am a Diving being!"
Dwarf - *Spits* "I hate you."
Me - *Block Spit*
Dwarf Fortress - *Dies*
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: DrKillPatient on July 08, 2014, 12:43:24 pm
I just walked into a level of my home fortress and tons of dead dwarves lie all around. Apparently it's self-inflicted.

(http://i.imgur.com/qovi71w.png)

I feel like this is a result of no attacker being identified in worldgen, so it defaults to self.

EDIT: Also, I think I accidentally claimed the mountainhome as my own. All the dwarves are talking about it.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Tawa on July 08, 2014, 02:15:34 pm
I haven't had any of those sorts of funny conversations yet, but my companions keep yapping at me about random monsters.

They take pleasure in getting on my nerves.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Spehss _ on July 08, 2014, 02:18:19 pm
Urist McRanger and Urist McFarmer are currently in a meeting hall in the mountain home.

Urist McRanger comments to Urist McFarmer: "It sure is dark in here."
Urist McFarmer replies to Urist McRanger: "At least it doesn't rain down here."

What is this, a sitcom?
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: AnotherDwarvernDeath on July 08, 2014, 04:24:17 pm
Me: "Wait here until I return."
Companion: "Of course." *keeps walking
Me: "Why are you traveling?"
Companion: "I'm on an important mission."
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: TheFlame52 on July 08, 2014, 04:50:46 pm
Sweet. PTW.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Guardian G.I. on July 08, 2014, 04:55:30 pm
posting to watch
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Authority2 on July 08, 2014, 06:25:57 pm
Omg.
I had a pretty good one where there was this one animal caretaker that kept asking what was going on even as other dwarves were being killed in the same room and/or trying to explain it to him.  I didn't record it,  though.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Cobbler89 on July 08, 2014, 06:55:44 pm
Quote from: AnotherDwarvernDeath on July 08, 2014, 04:24:17 pm
Me: "Wait here until I return."
Companion: "Of course." *keeps walking
Me: "Why are you traveling?"
Companion: "I'm on an important mission."
Holy synapses, batdwarf...

For years we've yelled, pleaded and written Notes to Urist demanding to know why these creatures can't do what we're telling them to do. We've analyzed, we've speculated, we've joked about what possible reasoning could be going on in their drunk little madmen's heads. We've written stories. We've written forum posts at each other roleplaying it out. We've stuck the gorram blighters in little in-game boxes and ran experiments on them like lab rats.

And today... they can finally tell us themselves what the #@%@#%@ they're thinking.

It's almost enough to make a grown overseer cry... if only it didn't leave us just as clueless as before.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: FloorBelow on July 08, 2014, 09:27:10 pm
I feel like these townsfolk haven't quite grasped the art of conversation.

(http://i.imgur.com/9Xer4HO.png)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: JohnieRWilkins on July 08, 2014, 09:49:27 pm
Quote from: FloorBelow on July 08, 2014, 09:27:10 pm
I feel like these townsfolk haven't quite grasped the art of conversation.

(http://i.imgur.com/9Xer4HO.png)
No they got it down just fine. That's the beginning of their biblical story.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: TheCoolSideofthePIllow on July 08, 2014, 09:53:25 pm
Quote from: JohnieRWilkins on July 08, 2014, 09:49:27 pm
Quote from: FloorBelow on July 08, 2014, 09:27:10 pm
I feel like these townsfolk haven't quite grasped the art of conversation.

(http://i.imgur.com/9Xer4HO.png)
No they got it down just fine. That's the beginning of their biblical story.

Unfortunately, they forgot to write down the names, dates and places. Only the events were recorded.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Imakuni on July 08, 2014, 10:15:58 pm
(http://i.imgur.com/kB3Ep7Z.png)

Didn't see this thread, posted this in that other thread. Anyway, kids these days.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Cobbler89 on July 08, 2014, 10:28:22 pm
Quote from: FloorBelow on July 08, 2014, 09:27:10 pm
I feel like these townsfolk haven't quite grasped the art of conversation.

(http://i.imgur.com/9Xer4HO.png)
It was inevitable.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Blastbeard on July 08, 2014, 10:30:30 pm
(http://cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/500x/45815872.jpg)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Putnam on July 08, 2014, 11:11:17 pm
Every time I yelled in one room, the general who was stationed there would spit at me. It was kinda annoying, but I dodged every time. The one time I reciprocated, it hit his boot. Hehe.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: snjwffl on July 08, 2014, 11:35:39 pm
PTW
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Xanmyral on July 09, 2014, 12:19:15 am
Dramatized.
"Hm... You don't say?" A human asked in mild curiosity, leaning against his spear as its butt dug into the dry sod and yellow grass. He wiped a bead of sweat from his forehead.
"Pretty hot today, isn't it?" The man asked his, starting to regret wearing so much armor. His companion however didn't quite feel the same, the waxy slate-grey skin of the large humanoid showing no signs of the heat as its three lidless eyes merely looked to the sun.
"It doesn't bother me so much."

Before either could continue, they were interrupted by a piercing scream of horror as a second human shakily held her hammer and shield out towards the Woman of Shadow, before backing away and fleeing.

The man sighed, pinching his brow. "Sorry about her. So, you were saying about your family...?"
The conversation wasn't the most enlightening, but it was a good distraction from the heat and the long roads.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: FireCrazy on July 09, 2014, 03:17:27 am
(http://i.imgur.com/DmD4MZ8.png)

Posted this in another thread, but gotta share to this thread too. Seems like Toady implemented torture.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Putnam on July 09, 2014, 03:20:52 am
Dwarves consider all forms of torture an offense worth execution, so I doubt that that's right.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: BillyTheKid on July 09, 2014, 03:39:48 am
Oh, sorry to hear that

(http://abload.de/img/howslifegbfeh.png)


the new update is definitly exciting, I am very happy to be playing it :D
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: klefenz on July 09, 2014, 10:15:08 am
Taliking with a fish cleaner, i ask for a cease of hostilities, he agrees.

Me: Goodbye.

*Fish cleaner fires his crossbow at me*

Fish Cleaner: Goodbye.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Kamamura on July 09, 2014, 10:23:31 am
Quote from: klefenz on July 09, 2014, 10:15:08 am
Taliking with a fish cleaner, i ask for a cease of hostilities, he agrees.

Me: Goodbye.

*Fish cleaner fires his crossbow at me*

Fish Cleaner: Goodbye.

Okay, one last bolt, and we are friends ;-)

Makes sense, if you landed the first blow.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: TheSaberTooth on July 09, 2014, 10:24:26 am
Me: Come, Join me on my adventures!
Crossbowman: *spits at me* Surely any place is better than this, lets be off!
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: klefenz on July 09, 2014, 11:10:56 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Still dont know why everyone wants me dead, must be those goblins I killed.

I still havent had anyone spit on me or say "I hate you", theyre always so polite when they try to stab and shoot me.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: ICBM pilot on July 09, 2014, 11:17:44 am
I was ambushed four times by a party of one and every time he just retreated and the next time he ambushed me I just tried to talk to him and it went something like this:
me: how's life around here?
him: I just attacked Thathil Crossrushed(me)
me: where can I find Thathil Crossrushed
him: I don't know, I don't even know anyone who might know
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: The W axis on July 09, 2014, 11:20:35 am
(http://i.imgur.com/ZKWpFmz.png)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: FallenAngel on July 09, 2014, 11:24:24 am
I got spat at by a child right when I started.
He then ran into a wall and tried to climb it without knowing there was a ceiling.
The conversation was like this:

"Hello, child"
"I hate you."
The child spits.
"Hello child"
"I hate you"
The child spits.
The axeman spits.

I spat back, and it landed in his hair.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: TheCoolSideofthePIllow on July 09, 2014, 01:22:56 pm
(http://i.imgur.com/wR0dTBt.png)

"That good, huh?"
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Megaman_zx on July 09, 2014, 01:56:50 pm
Quote from: TheCoolSideofthePIllow on July 09, 2014, 01:22:56 pm
(http://i.imgur.com/wR0dTBt.png)

That perfectly sums up this buggy release.... it's epic!!!! then it crashes.... :(     can't wait for everything to be stabilized and the mods to be updated XD
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: IronTomato on July 09, 2014, 03:29:36 pm
Quote from: Kamamura on July 08, 2014, 12:01:37 pm
HAha, Weasel story is hilarious. Another slightly edited story from my adventure:

==============================================================

Ugo MaliceBeards, human outcast and traveller, have been crossing a mountain pass for several days. Tired and dehydrated, his body longed for a proper night's rest and warm food. He was approaching a site that should, according to his maps, contain a dwarven settlement. Ugo expected ramparts, walls, sturdy gates, and watchful patrols, but to his surprise, all he found was a hole in the ground with a ladder. Carefully, he descended the ladder and found himself in a dusty cave, dimly lit with several torches, with a few beds and sparse furniture. A single, healthy and content looking dwarf was sitting at a table carving a figurine from wood.

"Hello, my name is Ugo MaliceBeards. Could you please tell me about your local troubles?"
The dwarf turned his creation in his hands, looking at it from several angles. "Well met, Ugo. We have here ... abductions, night horrors and bandits."
"Tell me about the bandints, then."
"A month ago, Borpo PlasticAxe, bandit leader and heathen, has started to terrorize local people with his band called Romantic Colors."
"And could you tell me where I could find this Borpo, friend?"
"You cannot find him, for he is dead. A troll called Buchu NightCabbage has abducted Borpo three weeks ago, torturing him to death shortly after."
"My blade longs for heroic deeds. Tell me, where could I find this troll Buchu to prove my mettle?"
"You could find him in a nearby forest, he won't put much of a fight."
"Why is that?"
"Two weeks ago, my friend and companion Urist LongBottoms has tracked and killed this monster, whose lust for murder cost lives of hundreds."
"That's excellent news, I would like to meet your friend Urist, commend his bravery and perhaps learn from him about combat."
"I am afraid that is not possible, my friend, for Urist has left this world a week ago. He was killed at midnight in his sleep."
"And pray tell me, who committed this craven murder?"
Suddenly, the torches' flames dimmed a bit, and a chilling breeze blew through the cavern. In a moment of darkness, the eyes of Ugo's host gleamed with red light and he naked his long, white teeth in an ugly smile.
"That is an excellent question, Ugo, I thought you would never ask. It's time I told you about the night horrors that plague this land."


This sounds like it should be a folk tale or something. It's awesome.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: XXSockXX on July 09, 2014, 03:33:59 pm
Crosspost from First Impressions thread. No idea what is going on.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: TheCoolSideofthePIllow on July 09, 2014, 03:41:47 pm
Quote from: FallenAngel on July 09, 2014, 11:24:24 am
I got spat at by a child right when I started.
He then ran into a wall and tried to climb it without knowing there was a ceiling.
The conversation was like this:

"Hello, child"
"I hate you."
The child spits.
"Hello child"
"I hate you"
The child spits.
The axeman spits.

I spat back, and it landed in his hair.

How do you spit back at them? Is it an option or automatic?
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Steelmagic on July 09, 2014, 03:44:21 pm
Quote from: TheCoolSideofthePIllow on July 09, 2014, 03:41:47 pm
Quote from: FallenAngel on July 09, 2014, 11:24:24 am
I got spat at by a child right when I started.
He then ran into a wall and tried to climb it without knowing there was a ceiling.
The conversation was like this:

"Hello, child"
"I hate you."
The child spits.
"Hello child"
"I hate you"
The child spits.
The axeman spits.

I spat back, and it landed in his hair.

How do you spit back at them? Is it an option or automatic?
x, then go down to natural abilities, spit on all the things.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: jocke the beast on July 09, 2014, 03:50:42 pm
Quote from: TheSaberTooth on July 09, 2014, 10:24:26 am
Me: Come, Join me on my adventures!
Crossbowman: *spits at me* Surely any place is better than this, lets be off!

I read this 5 minutes ago, laughed my ass off....and can't stop laughing...girlfriend wonders...can't explain...better then any comedy I've ever seen/read...  :D :D
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Andux on July 09, 2014, 06:02:22 pm
One of my companions talking to the other:

(http://i57.tinypic.com/2uzvzgg.png)

Betca McSwordsalot confirmed for socially awkward penguin with a crush. :P
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: klefenz on July 09, 2014, 07:08:57 pm
Wrestler: Hello [my name], lets not hurt anybody
Me: It is good to see you. Long live the cause!
Wrestler: Murderer!

One of the guards from my palace a couple days after I took over. At least this time he didnt spit.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: ShoesandHats on July 09, 2014, 09:35:29 pm
(http://i.imgur.com/zNSwaAn.png)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Enemy post on July 09, 2014, 11:44:01 pm
You must yield!
You first coward! (sprints into the sunset)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Arcvasti on July 09, 2014, 11:50:53 pm
PTW
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Azrayel on July 10, 2014, 12:31:30 am
PTW; too goot.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Cptn Kaladin Anrizlokum on July 10, 2014, 12:40:19 am
My buddy the dwarven paladin. "Let's not hurt anyone" - immediately crushes a guy's skull, then lays over the body for five real time minutes. I can only assume he was praying for them.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: TheCritsyBear on July 10, 2014, 06:44:48 am
So there I was, travelling to a nearby trade hub to buy myself a backpack, as wanderers apparently set out to adventure completely naked with nothing but a knife and a pointy stick.

But then, suddenly, on the road, I was "Ambush!"ed. I looked around... Nobody. Then a gray L appeared out of thin air, and proceeded to meander around, completely docile.

"Greetings, I am Human McWanderer."
No response.
*Generic Weather comment.*
No response.
"Why are you travelling?"
I then looked at him as he continued to refuse to make small talk with me... It turns out he was a "Giant Lion Recruit."
"Is something troubling you?" I asked the lion.
Then he started walking away, and as soon as I took a step to follow him, the DF died.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Awessum Possum on July 10, 2014, 10:45:23 am
Please note that the goblin and axedwarf are my companions, who were friendly when I recruited them.

The goblin axeman slashes the kea in the right foot with his +bronze halberd+ and the part explodes into gore!
The kea is propelled away by the force of the blow!
Urist McPsycho 1: This is my fight too!
1: I cannot stand idly by!
The kea looks sick
1: I shall take revenge!
the axedwarf strikes at the goblin axeman but the shot is blocked!
The goblin axeman strikes the axedwarf in the right upper leg, tearing the fat!
The axedwarf punches you but misses

The goblin proceeded to kill the dwarf and exult in his victory, meanwhile my adventurer started crying.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: XArgon on July 10, 2014, 01:55:29 pm
Ooh, my... 40.01 is such wonderful comedy fuel. :D

Also,
Quote from: Kamamura on July 08, 2014, 12:01:37 pm
"That is an excellent question, Ugo, I thought you would never ask. It's time I told you about the night horrors that plague this land."
great story, Kamamura! :)

Other than that... greeting someone, just to take a crossbow bolt in the face instead of a response? Yep, been there. (it is terrifying).

PS: Also, "It is terrifying" should definitely be the unofficial name of 40.01. Not as contempt, no - it's just too hilarious how memetic this phrase is. :D
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: monk12 on July 10, 2014, 02:13:53 pm
It was inevitable.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: TheCoolSideofthePIllow on July 10, 2014, 03:57:27 pm
This kid...

Code: [Select]
You: How have things been?
Tirin Sporrorith, Spearman: I hear that there is an insurrection against The Council of Owners in Lyricfin.
You: This must be stopped by any means at our disposal.
You: Tell me about the local ruler.
Tirin Sporrorith, Spearman: The Council of Owners rules Lyricfin.  Lurit Bedstuck the Mellow Cavern of Pastimes is lord.  I don't know anything else about them.
You: Does anybody else still have a stake in these lands?
Tirin Sporrorith, Spearman: There are no fewer than eleven other groups vying for control.
Beso Otngelide, Child: Hello Lurit.  Let's not hurt anybody.
You: Hello.  It is good to see you.  This servant of Tura Primereins greets you.
The Child spits!
The flying Beso Yawnedsounds's human spit misses You!
Beso Otngelide, Child: Murderer!
Beso Otngelide, Child (to Tirin Sporrorith, Spearman): Hello Tirin.
Tirin Sporrorith, Spearman (to Beso Otngelide, Child): Hey.  It is good to see you.
Beso Otngelide, Child (to Tirin Sporrorith, Spearman): I hear that there is an insurrection against The Council of Owners in Lyricfin.
Tirin Sporrorith, Spearman (to Beso Otngelide, Child): It was inevitable.

(BTW: *I* am Lurit Bedstuck, and this kid watched me murder his whole family right in front of him. I tried to kidnap him, but he won't join me and I don't know if I can grab him by the wrist and just.... take him.)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Archereon on July 10, 2014, 06:38:02 pm
I assume he's the son/daughter of the rightful Lord/Lady of Lyricfin. If you're stealthy, you could potentially break one of his/her bones with wrestling, resulting in the kid passing out, then repeatedly throw him until the heir is in an isolated area. You should then do science on whether torturing people to get them to submit to your orders (in this case, presumably being installed as a figurehead while you go off and conquer other sites) works.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Dante on July 10, 2014, 07:22:56 pm
It was inevitable that I would PTW.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Archereon on July 10, 2014, 07:32:02 pm
It IS inevitable that overusing this meme will turn it into "Arrow to the Knee": Dwarf Fortress Edition. That's what part of me thinks. The other part of me hopes that when gods of fate release demons from hell for reasons generally along the lines of "it was written", that there will eventually be multiple possible lines to describe the reasoning, one of which will be "because it was inevitable."
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: klefenz on July 10, 2014, 07:34:42 pm
Quote from: TheCoolSideofthePIllow on July 10, 2014, 03:57:27 pm
This kid...

Code: [Select]
You: How have things been?
Tirin Sporrorith, Spearman: I hear that there is an insurrection against The Council of Owners in Lyricfin.
You: This must be stopped by any means at our disposal.
You: Tell me about the local ruler.
Tirin Sporrorith, Spearman: The Council of Owners rules Lyricfin.  Lurit Bedstuck the Mellow Cavern of Pastimes is lord.  I don't know anything else about them.
You: Does anybody else still have a stake in these lands?
Tirin Sporrorith, Spearman: There are no fewer than eleven other groups vying for control.
Beso Otngelide, Child: Hello Lurit.  Let's not hurt anybody.
You: Hello.  It is good to see you.  This servant of Tura Primereins greets you.
The Child spits!
The flying Beso Yawnedsounds's human spit misses You!
Beso Otngelide, Child: Murderer!
Beso Otngelide, Child (to Tirin Sporrorith, Spearman): Hello Tirin.
Tirin Sporrorith, Spearman (to Beso Otngelide, Child): Hey.  It is good to see you.
Beso Otngelide, Child (to Tirin Sporrorith, Spearman): I hear that there is an insurrection against The Council of Owners in Lyricfin.
Tirin Sporrorith, Spearman (to Beso Otngelide, Child): It was inevitable.

(BTW: *I* am Lurit Bedstuck, and this kid watched me murder his whole family right in front of him. I tried to kidnap him, but he won't join me and I don't know if I can grab him by the wrist and just.... take him.)

When I read "Council of Owners" I thought it was too good for the RNG.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Archereon on July 10, 2014, 07:36:00 pm
Was council of owners the group the adventurer had formed or the group that formerly governed the site?
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: klefenz on July 10, 2014, 08:08:28 pm
What about trading with a merchant who is "no quarter" fighting you? Good thing these civilians have really shitty accuracy.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Freak2121 on July 10, 2014, 08:32:50 pm
I was preparing for a fierce battle with a midnight crone, and somewhat expecting my own death. Instead...

(http://i.imgur.com/fo1KUMQ.png)

I could ask more if you guys are interested. :p
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Authority2 on July 10, 2014, 08:36:30 pm
Quote from: Archereon on July 10, 2014, 06:38:02 pm
repeatedly throw him until the heir is in an isolated area
I think throwing turns fights into no quarter. I threw an elf off a tree and it escalated into that from a brawl.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: klefenz on July 10, 2014, 08:44:10 pm
Well, since everyone is pansy and combat is really easy in this version im not using armor anyome, I just dress my adventurer up as a schoolgirl and go kill everything. This is becoming an anime.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Archereon on July 10, 2014, 08:48:13 pm
Quote from: Authority2 on July 10, 2014, 08:36:30 pm
Quote from: Archereon on July 10, 2014, 06:38:02 pm
repeatedly throw him until the heir is in an isolated area
I think throwing turns fights into no quarter. I threw an elf off a tree and it escalated into that from a brawl.

What if the victim is already unconscious though? SCIENCE should be done, but I don't have access to DF right now.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: FearfulJesuit on July 10, 2014, 08:53:54 pm
A real, live, computer-generated NPC location.

(http://imgur.com/bFUPeu3.png)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Steele on July 10, 2014, 09:03:42 pm
I've been slowly converting all of my custom creatures to work with the new version, and have begun testing them in the arena.
I had 5 of them face off against a bunch of cats, and this was the result;
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: RealFear on July 10, 2014, 09:07:37 pm
Quote from: Steele on July 10, 2014, 09:03:42 pm
I've been slowly converting all of my custom creatures to work with the new version, and have begun testing them in the arena.
I had 5 of them face off against a bunch of cats, and this was the result;
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I like how they switched to singular nouns for the last two cats.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: klefenz on July 10, 2014, 09:10:29 pm
Quote from: Steele on July 10, 2014, 09:03:42 pm
I've been slowly converting all of my custom creatures to work with the new version, and have begun testing them in the arena.
I had 5 of them face off against a bunch of cats, and this was the result;
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

"A few weeks ago gods died, gods died,god died and god died in The Arena"
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Kishmond on July 10, 2014, 11:37:19 pm
Quote from: Archereon on July 10, 2014, 07:32:02 pm
It IS inevitable that overusing this meme will turn it into "Arrow to the Knee": Dwarf Fortress Edition. That's what part of me thinks. The other part of me hopes that when gods of fate release demons from hell for reasons generally along the lines of "it was written", that there will eventually be multiple possible lines to describe the reasoning, one of which will be "because it was inevitable."

Yeah, but for now it is terrifying fun.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Chagen46 on July 10, 2014, 11:57:25 pm
I love this so much. The new conversation engine only results in complete surrealist absurdity with every conversation.

Quote from: Kamamura on July 08, 2014, 12:01:37 pm
HAha, Weasel story is hilarious. Another slightly edited story from my adventure:

==============================================================

Ugo MaliceBeards, human outcast and traveller, have been crossing a mountain pass for several days. Tired and dehydrated, his body longed for a proper night's rest and warm food. He was approaching a site that should, according to his maps, contain a dwarven settlement. Ugo expected ramparts, walls, sturdy gates, and watchful patrols, but to his surprise, all he found was a hole in the ground with a ladder. Carefully, he descended the ladder and found himself in a dusty cave, dimly lit with several torches, with a few beds and sparse furniture. A single, healthy and content looking dwarf was sitting at a table carving a figurine from wood.

"Hello, my name is Ugo MaliceBeards. Could you please tell me about your local troubles?"
The dwarf turned his creation in his hands, looking at it from several angles. "Well met, Ugo. We have here ... abductions, night horrors and bandits."
"Tell me about the bandints, then."
"A month ago, Borpo PlasticAxe, bandit leader and heathen, has started to terrorize local people with his band called Romantic Colors."
"And could you tell me where I could find this Borpo, friend?"
"You cannot find him, for he is dead. A troll called Buchu NightCabbage has abducted Borpo three weeks ago, torturing him to death shortly after."
"My blade longs for heroic deeds. Tell me, where could I find this troll Buchu to prove my mettle?"
"You could find him in a nearby forest, he won't put much of a fight."
"Why is that?"
"Two weeks ago, my friend and companion Urist LongBottoms has tracked and killed this monster, whose lust for murder cost lives of hundreds."
"That's excellent news, I would like to meet your friend Urist, commend his bravery and perhaps learn from him about combat."
"I am afraid that is not possible, my friend, for Urist has left this world a week ago. He was killed at midnight in his sleep."
"And pray tell me, who committed this craven murder?"
Suddenly, the torches' flames dimmed a bit, and a chilling breeze blew through the cavern. In a moment of darkness, the eyes of Ugo's host gleamed with red light and he naked his long, white teeth in an ugly smile.
"That is an excellent question, Ugo, I thought you would never ask. It's time I told you about the night horrors that plague this land."


This is amazing. Seriously sounds like the beginning to a folk tale or epic myth.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: TheCoolSideofthePIllow on July 11, 2014, 12:10:43 am
Quote from: Archereon on July 10, 2014, 07:36:00 pm
Was council of owners the group the adventurer had formed or the group that formerly governed the site?

The group I formed. But I did just hit R until I got something that fit a follower of the god of rulership.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Archereon on July 11, 2014, 12:33:57 am
Quote from: TheCoolSideofthePIllow on July 11, 2014, 12:10:43 am
Quote from: Archereon on July 10, 2014, 07:36:00 pm
Was council of owners the group the adventurer had formed or the group that formerly governed the site?

The group I formed. But I did just hit R until I got something that fit a follower of the god of rulership.
Have you tried gifting people who hate you as leader with valuable crap repeatedly and seeing if their opinion of you changes? I've heard that can make them like you more, and given how thought works in fortress mode typically, I have a feeling you can make anyone willing to speak to you adore you.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Chagen46 on July 11, 2014, 12:54:12 am
I like how every line in each conversation has barely anything to do with each other.

(http://i.imgur.com/Ce1LfNi.png)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Emma on July 11, 2014, 02:05:44 am
(http://i.imgur.com/Eg9wPGi.png)

Apparently slapping people in the neck with a dangerous weapon is now suspicious.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: klefenz on July 11, 2014, 08:17:14 am
Quote from: Gamedragon on July 11, 2014, 02:05:44 am
(http://i.imgur.com/Eg9wPGi.png)

Apparently slapping people in the neck with a dangerous weapon is now suspicious.
It was just a silver sword.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: palu on July 11, 2014, 11:08:47 am
Telling someone about how I killed the lord and took over.
(http://i.imgur.com/8v705BM.png)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: IndigoFenix on July 11, 2014, 11:35:11 am
Whatever happened to editing speech strings in the data/speech folder?  Seems like this would be the best place to implement that system.  Then we could have 50 different phrases to use in place of 'it was inevitable'.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: duckman on July 11, 2014, 12:55:18 pm
Quote from: klefenz on July 11, 2014, 08:17:14 am
Quote from: Gamedragon on July 11, 2014, 02:05:44 am
(http://i.imgur.com/Eg9wPGi.png)

Apparently slapping people in the neck with a dangerous weapon is now suspicious.
It was just a silver sword.
Yeah, you'd need to pommel strike them for it to be considered dangerous.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Untelligent on July 12, 2014, 01:55:40 pm
(http://i.imgur.com/QmEjPWU.png)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Sergarr on July 12, 2014, 03:38:10 pm
Quote from: Untelligent on July 12, 2014, 01:55:40 pm
(http://i.imgur.com/QmEjPWU.png)
There really should be a system where people who consider you an enemy would not talk to you.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: TheCoolSideofthePIllow on July 12, 2014, 04:02:04 pm
Quote from: Sergarr on July 12, 2014, 03:38:10 pm
Quote from: Untelligent on July 12, 2014, 01:55:40 pm
(http://i.imgur.com/QmEjPWU.png)
There really should be a system where people who consider you an enemy would not talk to you.

There is. It just doesn't work correctly all the time.

This kid who watched me murder his parents refuses to talk to me. Whenever I speak to him, he just spits and calls me a murderer, then runs over and tells my companion there is a plot to kill me.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Leafsnail on July 12, 2014, 05:46:48 pm
Night creature conversations are the best.  Sadly he couldn't give me directions to the elk bird who attacked him earlier.

(http://i.imgur.com/IuwXlCR.png)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Sylveadiff on July 12, 2014, 05:49:35 pm
Quote from: Leafsnail on July 12, 2014, 05:46:48 pm
Night creature conversations are the best.  Sadly he couldn't give me directions to the elk bird who attacked him earlier.

(http://i.imgur.com/IuwXlCR.png)



Do night creatures know that they are night creatures?
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Leafsnail on July 12, 2014, 06:08:27 pm
Doesn't seem like it.  I also just passed a bunch of Raven Women who all bragged to each other about how they just attacked me (none of them actually thought to actually try and hit me, though).
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Kishmond on July 12, 2014, 09:23:35 pm
Me: Where are you traveling?
Human: I'm on an important mission.
*human stabs me with a pike*
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Selleri on July 12, 2014, 09:47:26 pm
I love the casual dialogue in the face of danger
(http://i.imgur.com/yuQ4kML.png)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Nasikabatrachus on July 12, 2014, 10:43:27 pm
I asked someone where I was after telling them about my lethal, heroic deeds:

(http://i.imgur.com/vf0zk1W.png)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: RealFear on July 12, 2014, 11:25:57 pm
Quote from: TheCoolSideofthePIllow on July 12, 2014, 04:02:04 pm
Quote from: Sergarr on July 12, 2014, 03:38:10 pm
Quote from: Untelligent on July 12, 2014, 01:55:40 pm
(http://i.imgur.com/QmEjPWU.png)
There really should be a system where people who consider you an enemy would not talk to you.

There is. It just doesn't work correctly all the time.

This kid who watched me murder his parents refuses to talk to me. Whenever I speak to him, he just spits and calls me a murderer, then runs over and tells my companion there is a plot to kill me.

Anybody will talk to you just fine if you skip "greet listener"
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Kamamura on July 13, 2014, 01:04:55 pm
I like how he made sure you won't be travelling alone in the night by crippling your leg.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: McDonald on July 13, 2014, 01:49:09 pm
You: Let us stop this pointless fighting!
Goblin Spearman: I will fight no more.
I then fell unconscious and died. Autopsy revealed that I was stabbed in the foot and then in the face by the same goblin.

You: You must yield!
A goblin then exploded in gore after hitting a wall. Did I push him or something? And what is yielding for? Does it mean surrendering?
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Putnam on July 13, 2014, 01:50:06 pm
https://www.google.com/search?q=yield&oq=yield&aqs=chrome..69i57&sourceid=chrome&es_sm=93&ie=UTF-8
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: McDonald on July 13, 2014, 01:53:50 pm
Quote from: Putnam on July 13, 2014, 01:50:06 pm
google link
Oh wow I'm dumb.  ::)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: FearsomeClarinet on July 13, 2014, 02:17:05 pm
I was wandering around looking for a camp to murder, when I came across a traveler.

Me:Why are you traveling?
My companion: A battle? I cannot stand idly by!

My companion proceeded to stab the traveler in the back of the head.

The traveler: I am on an important mission.

The traveler has bled to death.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: TheCoolSideofthePIllow on July 13, 2014, 11:17:41 pm
I tried to beat some information out of a kobold. Little bastard was pretty tight lipped, though.

Code: [Select]
You: Let us stop this pointless fighting!
Munosh Specutsi¤ur, Spearman: Death is all around us.  This is truly horrifying.
Munosh Specutsi¤ur, Spearman: Our time in The Windy Universes is so brief...  Begone fear!
You: Tell me about the local ruler.
You strap the +iron long sword+ to your Upper body.
You strap the +iron shield+ to your Upper body.
You grab The Kobold Administrator by the throat from behind with your right hand!
You: I hate it.
You: Where are their forces?  Are there patrols or guards?
You punch The Kobold Administrator in the head from behind with your left hand, bruising the muscle, bruising the skull!
The Kobold Administrator has been stunned!
You: Tell me about the local ruler.
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You place a chokehold on The Kobold Administrator's throat with Your right hand!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You: We are in the right in all matters.
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You: Do they have a firm grip on these lands?
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator is no longer stunned.
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You miss The Kobold Administrator!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You punch The Kobold Administrator in the head from the side with your left hand and the injured part explodes into gore!
The Kobold Administrator has been knocked unconscious!
Kobold Administrator has been struck down.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Kishmond on July 13, 2014, 11:57:38 pm
Wait, is that supposed to work? Awesome!
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Footkerchief on July 14, 2014, 12:11:17 am
I have no idea:
Code: [Select]
Dothan Ispraniguk, Spearman (to White Stork): Greetings.  My name is Dothan Conjurefence.  Life is, in a word, fertility.

Wasn't expecting that to work:
Code: [Select]
You lick the human bone meal.
You pick up the beetle paste and put it in your cotton plant fiber backpack.
You drink the beetle paste.

Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: mangulwort on July 14, 2014, 12:32:16 am
Quote from: TheCoolSideofthePIllow on July 13, 2014, 11:17:41 pm
I tried to beat some information out of a kobold. Little bastard was pretty tight lipped, though.

Code: [Select]
You: Let us stop this pointless fighting!
Munosh Specutsi¤ur, Spearman: Death is all around us.  This is truly horrifying.
Munosh Specutsi¤ur, Spearman: Our time in The Windy Universes is so brief...  Begone fear!
You: Tell me about the local ruler.
You strap the +iron long sword+ to your Upper body.
You strap the +iron shield+ to your Upper body.
You grab The Kobold Administrator by the throat from behind with your right hand!
You: I hate it.
You: Where are their forces?  Are there patrols or guards?
You punch The Kobold Administrator in the head from behind with your left hand, bruising the muscle, bruising the skull!
The Kobold Administrator has been stunned!
You: Tell me about the local ruler.
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You place a chokehold on The Kobold Administrator's throat with Your right hand!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You: We are in the right in all matters.
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You: Do they have a firm grip on these lands?
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator is no longer stunned.
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You miss The Kobold Administrator!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You punch The Kobold Administrator in the head from the side with your left hand and the injured part explodes into gore!
The Kobold Administrator has been knocked unconscious!
Kobold Administrator has been struck down.
Poor kobold....  :'(
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: dwarf_reform on July 14, 2014, 02:58:09 am
I'll just leave this here...
(http://i.imgur.com/olVhCUh.jpg)

(http://i.imgur.com/axpYPDw.jpg)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Steele on July 14, 2014, 04:53:20 am
I just had an interesting conversation with.. myself.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: klefenz on July 14, 2014, 05:17:49 am
Quote from: TheCoolSideofthePIllow on July 13, 2014, 11:17:41 pm
I tried to beat some information out of a kobold. Little bastard was pretty tight lipped, though.

Code: [Select]
You: Let us stop this pointless fighting!
Munosh Specutsi¤ur, Spearman: Death is all around us.  This is truly horrifying.
Munosh Specutsi¤ur, Spearman: Our time in The Windy Universes is so brief...  Begone fear!
You: Tell me about the local ruler.
You strap the +iron long sword+ to your Upper body.
You strap the +iron shield+ to your Upper body.
You grab The Kobold Administrator by the throat from behind with your right hand!
You: I hate it.
You: Where are their forces?  Are there patrols or guards?
You punch The Kobold Administrator in the head from behind with your left hand, bruising the muscle, bruising the skull!
The Kobold Administrator has been stunned!
You: Tell me about the local ruler.
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You place a chokehold on The Kobold Administrator's throat with Your right hand!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You: We are in the right in all matters.
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You: Do they have a firm grip on these lands?
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator is no longer stunned.
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You miss The Kobold Administrator!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You punch The Kobold Administrator in the head from the side with your left hand and the injured part explodes into gore!
The Kobold Administrator has been knocked unconscious!
Kobold Administrator has been struck down.

How is he supposed to talk when you placed a choke hold on him?
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Stoup on July 14, 2014, 10:10:13 am
Never mind the fact that those poor lil 'bolds can't actually speak sensibly either. Kind of miss running into a kobold ambush and seeing their gibberish warnings
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Kamamura on July 14, 2014, 10:36:42 am
Quote from: klefenz on July 14, 2014, 05:17:49 am
How is he supposed to talk when you placed a choke hold on him?

Those subtle nuances are often overlooked by the overzealous fascist interrogators.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Arcvasti on July 14, 2014, 11:34:32 am
Quote from: dwarf_reform on July 14, 2014, 02:58:09 am
I'll just leave this here...
(http://i.imgur.com/olVhCUh.jpg)

(http://i.imgur.com/axpYPDw.jpg)

I find it awesome that cats clean themselves of contaminants naturally.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: McDonald on July 14, 2014, 02:56:46 pm
The child spits!
The spit strikes You!
You lick yourself.

:(
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: TheCoolSideofthePIllow on July 14, 2014, 04:39:03 pm
Quote from: klefenz on July 14, 2014, 05:17:49 am
Quote from: TheCoolSideofthePIllow on July 13, 2014, 11:17:41 pm
I tried to beat some information out of a kobold. Little bastard was pretty tight lipped, though.

Code: [Select]
You: Let us stop this pointless fighting!
Munosh Specutsi¤ur, Spearman: Death is all around us.  This is truly horrifying.
Munosh Specutsi¤ur, Spearman: Our time in The Windy Universes is so brief...  Begone fear!
You: Tell me about the local ruler.
You strap the +iron long sword+ to your Upper body.
You strap the +iron shield+ to your Upper body.
You grab The Kobold Administrator by the throat from behind with your right hand!
You: I hate it.
You: Where are their forces?  Are there patrols or guards?
You punch The Kobold Administrator in the head from behind with your left hand, bruising the muscle, bruising the skull!
The Kobold Administrator has been stunned!
You: Tell me about the local ruler.
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You place a chokehold on The Kobold Administrator's throat with Your right hand!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You: We are in the right in all matters.
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You: Do they have a firm grip on these lands?
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator is no longer stunned.
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You miss The Kobold Administrator!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
The Kobold Administrator misses You!
You punch The Kobold Administrator in the head from the side with your left hand and the injured part explodes into gore!
The Kobold Administrator has been knocked unconscious!
Kobold Administrator has been struck down.

How is he supposed to talk when you placed a choke hold on him?

They can still breathe fine under a chokehold. It isn't until you begin to strangle them that they lose the ability to breath normally.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: palu on July 15, 2014, 08:56:58 pm
So I attacked and murdered my companions. What does the only survivor have to say?
(http://i.imgur.com/yHvVs7w.png)
It was inevitable.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Urist McVoyager on July 15, 2014, 09:23:52 pm
Everything in this game is inevitable.  :P There's too many players running too many forts to let much pass by.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Johuotar on July 16, 2014, 08:32:52 am
(http://i.imgur.com/j2xm83p.png)

I claimed my old fort and the lone survior there decided to inform all the other nonexistant people there about it.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: My Name is Immaterial on July 16, 2014, 11:07:36 am
Actually, he may have been talking to you.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: TheVelvetGentleman on July 16, 2014, 12:16:24 pm
First Post -- Hello everybody.

I had some fun in my first labyrinth since the big update.

Minotaur: 'I'll eat you whole!'
Minotaur: 'I'll eat you whole!'
Minotaur: 'I'll grind you into porridge!'
Minotaur: 'I'll eat you whole!'

*time passes in much the same way as I hunt*

Minotaur: 'I'll grind you into porridge!'
Minotaur: 'I'll grind you into porridge!'
Minotaur: 'I'll eat you whole!'

*upon reaching a dead-end I turn back and come face to face with the beast*

Minotaur: 'I must withdraw!'
Minotaur: 'Is that a weapon? What's going on?'

*the Minotaur proceeds to run away, presumably with arms and hands waving in the air*
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Arcvasti on July 16, 2014, 12:53:33 pm
That minotaur REALLY can't decide how he wants to eat you, can he. If he'd actually killed you, he'd probably have compromised and put you in a quiche.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Redzephyr01 on July 16, 2014, 12:57:52 pm
So I tamed a demon. You'll never believe what he said to me.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I think he took it pretty well.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: nomoetoe on July 16, 2014, 03:05:16 pm
Quote from: Redzephyr01 on July 16, 2014, 12:57:52 pm
So I tamed a demon. You'll never believe what he said to me.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I think he took it pretty well.
It was inevitable.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Sylveadiff on July 16, 2014, 04:42:23 pm
Quote from: nomoetoe on July 16, 2014, 03:05:16 pm
Quote from: Redzephyr01 on July 16, 2014, 12:57:52 pm
So I tamed a demon. You'll never believe what he said to me.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I think he took it pretty well.
It was inevitable.
It is terrific.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: palu on July 16, 2014, 06:59:55 pm
Quote from: Sylveadiff on July 16, 2014, 04:42:23 pm
Quote from: nomoetoe on July 16, 2014, 03:05:16 pm
Quote from: Redzephyr01 on July 16, 2014, 12:57:52 pm
So I tamed a demon. You'll never believe what he said to me.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I think he took it pretty well.
It was inevitable.
It is terrific.
It is for the best
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Orange Wizard on July 16, 2014, 07:13:06 pm
Quote from: palu on July 16, 2014, 06:59:55 pm
Quote from: Sylveadiff on July 16, 2014, 04:42:23 pm
Quote from: nomoetoe on July 16, 2014, 03:05:16 pm
Quote from: Redzephyr01 on July 16, 2014, 12:57:52 pm
So I tamed a demon. You'll never believe what he said to me.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I think he took it pretty well.
It was inevitable.
It is terrific.
It is for the best
MAAAGGGMMAAAAAAAA
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: RoaryStar on July 16, 2014, 08:53:22 pm
Quote from: InsanityIncarnate on July 16, 2014, 07:13:06 pm
Quote from: palu on July 16, 2014, 06:59:55 pm
Quote from: Sylveadiff on July 16, 2014, 04:42:23 pm
Quote from: nomoetoe on July 16, 2014, 03:05:16 pm
Quote from: Redzephyr01 on July 16, 2014, 12:57:52 pm
So I tamed a demon. You'll never believe what he said to me.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I think he took it pretty well.
It was inevitable.
It is terrific.
It is for the best
MAAAGGGMMAAAAAAAA
Not three hours ago InsanityIncarnate died of the heat.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: palu on July 16, 2014, 10:55:50 pm
Quote from: RoaryStar on July 16, 2014, 08:53:22 pm
Quote from: InsanityIncarnate on July 16, 2014, 07:13:06 pm
Quote from: palu on July 16, 2014, 06:59:55 pm
Quote from: Sylveadiff on July 16, 2014, 04:42:23 pm
Quote from: nomoetoe on July 16, 2014, 03:05:16 pm
Quote from: Redzephyr01 on July 16, 2014, 12:57:52 pm
So I tamed a demon. You'll never believe what he said to me.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I think he took it pretty well.
It was inevitable.
It is terrific.
It is for the best
MAAAGGGMMAAAAAAAA
Not three hours ago InsanityIncarnate died of the heat.
It is sad, but not unexpected.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 17, 2014, 04:32:30 am
Quote from: palu on July 16, 2014, 10:55:50 pm
Quote from: RoaryStar on July 16, 2014, 08:53:22 pm
Quote from: InsanityIncarnate on July 16, 2014, 07:13:06 pm
Quote from: palu on July 16, 2014, 06:59:55 pm
Quote from: Sylveadiff on July 16, 2014, 04:42:23 pm
Quote from: nomoetoe on July 16, 2014, 03:05:16 pm
Quote from: Redzephyr01 on July 16, 2014, 12:57:52 pm
So I tamed a demon. You'll never believe what he said to me.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I think he took it pretty well.
It was inevitable.
It is terrific.
It is for the best
MAAAGGGMMAAAAAAAA
Not three hours ago InsanityIncarnate died of the heat.
It is sad, but not unexpected.
Quote continuation, insert conversation piece.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: nasobema on July 17, 2014, 04:34:27 am
Quote from: Arcvasti on July 16, 2014, 12:53:33 pm
That minotaur REALLY can't decide how he wants to eat you, can he. If he'd actually killed you, he'd probably have compromised and put you in a quiche.

Which naturally reminds me of...
http://lotr.wikia.com/wiki/Tom,_Bert,_and_William (http://lotr.wikia.com/wiki/Tom,_Bert,_and_William)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Sutremaine on July 17, 2014, 08:08:17 am
Took my human companion to some goblin pits to see what was going on. He started beating up on them, so I told him to cut it out. "I will fight no more," he replied, and carried on fighting. So I decided to make him stop, and punched him in the leg and told him to yield. This made him unhappy to the point where he cancelled our adventuring agreement, and I re-recruited him. It didn't stick, however, and he started attacking me. Bastard stole my +bronze long sword+ off me and busted up my arm as well. I recruited a heavily-injured goblin and we crawled out of the pits together to travel and heal. The bastard human appeared to be in the area of the pits, but they cover such a large area that I gave up and picked up a stray silver bolt as my new weapon. Hopefully it doesn't count as one for the purposes of alarming civilians.

Wandering the wilds together, my companion and I suddenly felt uneasy. To the north north west, just out of my field of view, there was some commotion. Unfortunately, this meant I didn't notice the night creature right next to us from the south, and it leapt upon the hapless goblin. It wasn't hostile to me though, so I tried to talk it down. Wasn't happening, so I made with the small talk.
(http://i.imgur.com/xMHE7b0.png?1)

He seems a chipper fellow. Perhaps I shall recruit him.

Edit: This is the best conversation ever.
(http://i.imgur.com/5B67fZW.png?1)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: ThothAgrippa on July 17, 2014, 11:55:47 am
Law-Breaking, one of the many inevitables of life... our time in the Glittering Realm is so short, begone fear!
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: ff2 on July 17, 2014, 02:16:02 pm
Quote from: ThothAgrippa on July 17, 2014, 11:55:47 am
Law-Breaking, one of the many inevitables of life... our time in the Glittering Realm is so short, begone fear!

It is terrifying.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: TheSaberTooth on July 17, 2014, 02:21:58 pm
Quote from: ff2 on July 17, 2014, 02:16:02 pm
Quote from: ThothAgrippa on July 17, 2014, 11:55:47 am
Law-Breaking, one of the many inevitables of life... our time in the Glittering Realm is so short, begone fear!

It is terrifying.
It is sad, but not unexpected.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Inquisitor Dust on July 18, 2014, 01:05:09 am
(http://i.imgur.com/NQnU9NM.png)

Right after I killed several one of her friends, of course.
It wasn't a good scrap, by the way.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: TheSaberTooth on July 18, 2014, 06:05:45 pm
So I asked a Demon about its family and:

(http://i.imgur.com/pfKbxqW.jpg)

It went psycho on me. I mean, it BIT ME WHILE I WAS FLYING BACK FROM ITS FIRST ATTACK.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: PanH on July 18, 2014, 07:36:28 pm
When asking a travelling warrior about himself :
"I don't know me, I don't even know anyone who might know"
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: shevtsov200 on July 18, 2014, 11:20:39 pm
(http://data3.floomby.com/files/share/19_7_2014/6/7MW9C6FRGEiqLmotW4qz9g.jpg)
Knowing no mercy.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 19, 2014, 01:07:54 am
Quote from: shevtsov200 on July 18, 2014, 11:20:39 pm
(http://data3.floomby.com/files/share/19_7_2014/6/7MW9C6FRGEiqLmotW4qz9g.jpg)
Knowing no mercy.

He stole an onion. Off with his head.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: shevtsov200 on July 19, 2014, 02:52:41 am
Quote from: Dunamisdeos on July 19, 2014, 01:07:54 am
He stole an onion. Off with his head.
I wonder, what would they do if someone killed their king.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: scrdest on July 19, 2014, 03:41:19 am
Quote from: shevtsov200 on July 19, 2014, 02:52:41 am
Quote from: Dunamisdeos on July 19, 2014, 01:07:54 am
He stole an onion. Off with his head.
I wonder, what would they do if someone killed their king.

Inevitable, who cares. Now an onion...
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: klefenz on July 19, 2014, 04:03:25 am
Quote from: Dunamisdeos on July 19, 2014, 01:07:54 am
Quote from: shevtsov200 on July 18, 2014, 11:20:39 pm
(http://data3.floomby.com/files/share/19_7_2014/6/7MW9C6FRGEiqLmotW4qz9g.jpg)
Knowing no mercy.

She stole an onion. Off with her head.

FTFY
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Loam on July 19, 2014, 11:43:44 am
(http://i60.tinypic.com/juh2lc.jpg)

A child's poignant comment on the human condition...
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Spehss _ on July 19, 2014, 11:46:41 am
Quote from: Loam on July 19, 2014, 11:43:44 am
(http://i60.tinypic.com/juh2lc.jpg)

A child's poignant comment on the human condition...

Looks like someone's gon' get shanked.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: TheSaberTooth on July 19, 2014, 12:28:36 pm
Quote from: Spehss _ on July 19, 2014, 11:46:41 am
Quote from: Loam on July 19, 2014, 11:43:44 am
(http://i60.tinypic.com/juh2lc.jpg)

A child's poignant comment on the human condition...

Looks like someone's gon' get shanked.
Shanked and Ganked.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Bumber on July 19, 2014, 05:34:12 pm
Looks like a Mexican standoff.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: SeriousConcentrate on July 20, 2014, 12:27:17 am
PTW
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: palu on August 06, 2014, 10:30:20 pm
Discussing religion with my lady:
(https://photos-6.dropbox.com/t/0/AABzk2M1qqGG6490z2dGdVcgQybG0hH7Y873pEomGRvHGw/12/130539314/png/1024x768/3/1407387600/0/2/Screenshot%202014-08-06%2023.28.54.png/4-05GXjmrQh9P6UCN8GOf4WXjvGbJaBm28LZg2lXBF8)
She worships Osel Fatewitch the Hateful Poisons, deity of murder and death. I know who my next adventurer will worship.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Eric Blank on August 15, 2014, 05:36:40 pm
Raiding a mage tower when a zombie talked to me:

You: Hello, Elf. I am Ocna Bridleponders. Don't travel alone at night, or the bogeyman will get you.
Elf Corpse: I found myself dead.



Well, that is unfortunate...
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: XArgon on August 17, 2014, 10:44:59 am
Quote from: Eric Blank on August 15, 2014, 05:36:40 pm
You: Hello, Elf. I am Ocna Bridleponders. Don't travel alone at night, or the bogeyman will get you.
Elf Corpse: I found myself dead.
You should have told him that it was inevitable.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Bumber on August 17, 2014, 04:32:53 pm
Quote from: XArgon on August 17, 2014, 10:44:59 am
Quote from: Eric Blank on August 15, 2014, 05:36:40 pm
You: Hello, Elf. I am Ocna Bridleponders. Don't travel alone at night, or the bogeyman will get you.
Elf Corpse: I found myself dead.
You should have told him that it was inevitable.
Or that it was sad, but not unexpected.

What with him being a zombie and all.
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Andux on August 18, 2014, 12:45:37 am
Quote
Harpy (to Harpy): Just now I attacked me in The Putrid Biles.
Harpy (to Harpy): It was inevitable.

 ???
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: MC Dirty on August 30, 2014, 10:17:50 am
PTW
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Best DF2014 conversations
Post by: Steele on September 01, 2014, 03:43:50 am
Ran across a group of insane sparrow men.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)