PREPARE THE TRUE BIG BAD TO USERP THE FALSE ONE: THE ELDIRICHT PRO-4CHAN COMMUNIST GOD SCIZOR!!!!NO. YOU ARE NOT A FINAL BOSS. YOU ARE A HERO. ALSO, "ELDIRICHT"?
Well, this got silly fast :oYOU SUCCEED
Post To Watch
I wonder what you will do with that, probably something interesting.
HUNT THE MYSTERIOUS ELEPHANT(1)YOU ARE UNABLE TO FIND THE MYSTERIOUS ELEPHANT.
CROSS CONTINENT TO KILL EVIL DEMON LICH GOD WIZARD KING DRAGON(4)YOU SET OFF ON A JOURNEY TO KILL THE EVIL DEMON LICH GOD WIZARD KING DRAGON
Quest to make Elephant Parade revive Roll to Level Up. And to kill that EDLGWKDragon.(2)NO
SEARCH FOR SECRET TORCH LEVERS IN THE EMPTY FIELD(1)YOU CAN'T FIND ANY. IRRITATED, YOU DECIDE TO MAKE YOUR OWN. UNFORTUNATELY, YOU ONLY GET AS FAR AS LIGHTING A TORCH BEFORE YOU ACCIDENTALLY SET THE FIELD ON FIRE.
GET AWESOME EPIC EQUIPMENT(2)YOU'RE NOT SURE WHERE TO GET IT FROM.
You are disappoint. O was expecting something more interesting, very well, time to get stuckin.(1)YOUR SPACESHIP EXPLODES BEFORE YOU CAN DESCEND. YOU ARE SENT FLYING INTO SPACE, WHERE YOU DIE.
Quit watching from post, instead descend from orbit in a drop-craft, perhaps landing on that bonus-boss someone mentioned.
Go get a badass class for this quest.(4)YOU ASSEMBLE A CLAN. IT CONSISTS OF YOU, A WIZARD, AND A FIGHTER.
Be an evil wizard. Who must defeat demon wizard-king to become one himself!(1)AS A PALADIN, THE VERY THOUGHT OF DOING SOMETHING EVIL IS PAINFUL.
Another of EP's games. Well...(6)YOU SET MOST OF THE WORLD ON FIRE.
BURN EVERYTHING BETWEEN ME AND THE DEMON WIZARD DOUCHEBAG
Become sentient loot(2)YOU FAIL. TRY AGAIN.
FINE, BE PALADIN OF THE ELDIRITCH PRO-4CHAN COMMUNIST GOD SCIZOR!(4)SUCCESS
Locate a flute. Or guitar. Or sitar. Or saxophone. Some kind of instrument. I don't even know.(6)YOU DON'T REALLY KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS, SO YOU PICK A RANDOM THING UP. UPON CONSULTING A LOCAL BARD, YOU FIND OUT THAT IT'S ACTUALLY A SWORD. OOPS. TOO LATE TO CHANGE CLASS NOW!
Get flying antelope pet for traveling ease and comfort(4)SUCCESS.
You are disappoint. O was expecting something more interesting, very well, time to get stuckin.
Quit watching from post, instead descend from orbit in a drop-craft, perhaps landing on that bonus-boss someone mentioned.
Ride my antelope around looking for people who may need help for a monetary reward(3)SOMEONE ASKS YOU TO GO KILL SIX RABBITS
(Look for quests for gold)
It' time to extermintate the rooting evil!(4)IT REALLY IS. TOO BAD YOU DIDN'T ACTUALLY SPECIFY WHAT YOU MEANT.
HACK THE SERVER AND UN-BAN MYSELF(1)NO
Learn basic healing spells(1)YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW HEALING MAGIC WORKS. AFTER A BIT OF RESEARCH, YOU FIND OUT THAT YOU'RE CLASS CAN'T USE HEALING SPELLS, ITEMS, SPECIAL MOVES, TECHNIQUES, LIMIT BREAKS, OR ANY OTHER HEALING MANOEUVRE.
GET FLASK(3)>GET FLASK
It is a good thing there are clones. Same action,(Quoted for ease of aggravation)(3)YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND ALL OF THE CLONES AT ONCE. ALL BUT ONE BURN UP BEFORE LANDING.You are disappoint. O was expecting something more interesting, very well, time to get stuckin.
Quit watching from post, instead descend from orbit in a drop-craft, perhaps landing on that bonus-boss someone mentioned.
Go do quest related things.(6)YOU SOLVE EVERY SINGLE QUEST IN THE CITY. UNFORTUNATELY, YOU HIT THE DAILY XP CAP.
GO START GOING TO THE LICH'S PLACE(2)
GO START GOING TO THE LICH'S PLACE
GO START GOINGI DON'T FEEL LIKE WRITING A CREATIVE FAIL RESULT.
SET THE FIRE ON FIRE(4)SUCCESS
TRANSFORM THE FIRE INTO A FIRE SWORD THAT DOESN'T BURN ME(2)YOU'RE NOT A WIZARD.
Go get better gear for myself, my wizard, and my fighter. And healing potions.(2)ALL THE SHOPS ARE CLOSED BECAUSE IT'S TWO-SDAY
FROM ROOM IMPORT FLASK(4)FLASK OBTAINED
RESPAWN AS ARCH WIZARD(2)YOU RESPAWN WITH YOUR ORIGINAL CLASSSpoiler (click to show/hide)
Respawn as an class that can learn high-level healing Spells(4)SUCCESS
Use my paladin power to heal those in need!(6)YOU HEAL AN ARMY OF ORCS, WHO WERE AFRAID THAT THEY WERE GOING TO SUFFER SOME LOSSES FROM WOUNDS SUFFERED WHILE PILLAGING A VILLAGE
USE THE MONEY TO BUY EPIC MAGICAL EQUIPMENT AT A CHEAP PRICE(2)AFTER LOOKING AROUND FOR A WHILE, YOU CONCLUDE THAT EPIC MAGICAL EQUIPMENT ISN'T CHEAP
USE THE FIRE CONDITIONING TO ACQUIRE FIRE IMMUNITY.(2)THAT'S NOT HOW GAINING SKILLS WORKS
Use the antelope to kill each rabbit with its antlers while screaming, ¨CHARGE!¨(5)SUCCESS
KILL RABBITS AND GET REWARD
JON ADVENTURE AS A LIZARD WIZARD PROSTITUTE(1)YOU JOIN THE GAME AS A PEASANT
START GOING TO THE LICH'S PLACE(6)YOU BEGIN SPRINTING THROUGH VARIOUS ZONES
Loot droppods for gear.(4)YOU FIND AN EMPTY RAY GUN
BEGIN GRINDINGAssist by healing him when he needs it
YES IT IS. I CHECKED.(1)NO, IT'S NOT. "FIRE RESISTANCE" ISN'T EVEN A SKILL YOUR CLASS CAN NORMALLY OBTAIN.
Get a new skill from my level up.(3)LEARNED "ATTACK"! IT'S NOT REALLY MUCH OF A SKILL, BUT YOU DIDN'T HAVE IT BEFORE.
BEGIN GRINDING(6)YOU GRIND SO MUCH THAT YOU BREAK THE EXPERIENCE BUFFER BEFORE THE LEVEL CAN BE APPLIED. XP% -> 0.
Loot pod wreckage, since I just looked through the intact pods.(1)THE POD'S ENGINE EXPLODES. YOU DIE.
ADD MYSELF TO THE PARTY LIST(3)YOU ADD AN UNFINISHED ENTRY AND MULTICLASS INTO APPRENTICE
MULTICLASS INTO WIZARD
(3)YOU STEAL A POTION OF HEALING FROM SOME RANDOM GUYWONDER HOW I GOT A MAP ALL OF A SUDDEN
FINE, STEAL THE EQUIPMENT THEN
(4)YOU HEAL HIM, GAINING SOME EXPERIENCE IN THE PROCESS. +10% XPBEGIN GRINDINGAssist by healing him when he needs it
Join a jousting tournament to get lots of money(4)YOU ENTER YE OLDE JOUSTING TOURNEY
Now they must see the wrong in their ways! Teach them about kindness and gratitude!(5)SUCCESS
ACCIDENTALLY POSTED SOMEHOW. ACTUAL TURN WILL BE POSTED SHORTLY.LIES
GET A WEAPON SO THAT I CAN ACTUALLY KILL STUFF(3)YOU FIND A [RUSTY SHOVEL].
Somehow obtain armor that does not in anyway decrease my healing capabilities and protects me at the same time from attacks at the same time.(6)YOU FIND THE ROBE OF THE PACIFIST.
BECOME SHEEP SUMMONER. SUMMON LEGIONS OF SHEEP MINIONS.(6)SUCCESS
Go on side quest to obtain Class-specific Weapon of Infinity+1(4)YOU BEGIN THE FIRST QUEST IN THE 10-QUEST CHAIN.
Propose a HOLY QUEST for an army of newly converted orc paladins: find that damn LORD OF EVIL and...CONVERT HIM!(6)YOUR GOD MISINTERPRETS THE SITUATION AS YOU JOINING FORCES WITH THE ORCS TO BECOME THE NEW DARK LORD
MORE GRINDING(1)THE MONSTERS GRIND YOU. MONSTER ARMY HAS LEVELLED UP!
New clone time. Because automatic backups FTW.(5)SUCCESS. YOU CREATE A SELF-REPLICATING CLONE POD.
New pod too.
Win the affection of the most beautiful princess at ye ol' jousting tourney(1)WHILE YOU TRY TO WIN THE AFFECTION OF THE PRINCESS, ANOTHER ENTRANT STABS YOU. OOPS. YOU PROBABLY SHOULD HAVE FOCUSED ON THE ACTUAL TOURNEY.
(1)YOUR SHOVEL SHATTERS WHEN YOU TRY TO STRIKE AN ENEMY. ONE OF THE PIECES FLIES INTO YOUR EYE, WHICH AUTOMATICALLY GAINS AN EYEPATCH. YOU ARE NOW A PIRATE.With my shovel, begin digging trenches to protect home from goblins!
Screw responsibility! Grind on small creatures to gain xp in shovel combat
Join the party.(5)SUCCESS. YOU EVEN REMEMBER TO PICK A CLASS.
Screw you all, i'm going to build the third dungeon. you need the keys from the first and second dungeon to enter it.[HAS -> HAVE]
the first and second dungeon has yet to be designed.
Set off on a journey in my battlemech.(5)YOU DECIDE TO JOURNEY TO THE TOWER OF PLOT REVELATIONS.
STAB THE GM(5)YOU THROW A KNIFE. MIRACULOUSLY, IT FLIES ACROSS THE WORLD AND STRIKES THE BONUS BOSS. OW. +10% XP.
DEMAND THAT HE UPDATE
ALLY WITH THE SHEEP NATION, BECOME SUPER PRESIDENT MAYORUH
ALSO WHY DIDN'T I GET A ROLL
Bang sword against tree to make terrible music.
Smash through the front door of the tower.(3)YOU MAKE A DENT IN IT. SMASHING DOWN AN IRON DOOR IS TOUGH.
ALLY WITH THE SHEEP NATION, BECOME SUPER PRESIDENT MAYOR(4)YOU ALLY WITH THE SHEEP NATION. HOWEVER, "SUPER PRESIDENT MAYOR" IS NOT A POSITION IN THEIR DEMOCRACY.
ALSO WHY DIDN'T I GET A ROLL
What? But... Err... Introduce a complaint to my god's office in the afterlife! Receive a decent place in the heaven, at least!(1)YOUR COMPLAINT IS IGNORED. YOU ARE SENT TO HELL.
BECOME LORD OF(2)"LORD" IS ALSO NOT A POSITION IN THE SHEEP NATION'S GOVERNMENT.NEW ZEALANDSHEEP NATION
SUMMON MORE LOYAL SHEEP(5)YOU SUMMON FIVE SHEEP BODYGUARDS.
QUICKLY RESURECT DUE TO BEING MY DEITY'S ONLY FOLLOWER(2)YOU BEING YOUR DEITY'S ONLY FOLLOWER REDUCES YOUR DEITY'S POWER CONSIDERABLY.
Fill dungeon with Elite and Giant Mooks, give the dungeon boss a potion that stops it's glowing weakpoint from glowing.(1)YOU TRY TO GET POWERFUL MONSTERS TO VISIT YOUR DUNGEON, BUT THEY JUST KILL YOU. OOPS. YOU PROBABLY SHOULD HAVE DE-ALLIED WITH THE HERO NATION BEFORE YOU DID THAT.
Find a less whealy intellectually and pretty girl then
And also heal my stab wound
a less whealy intellectually and pretty girlWHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?
join teh party.(5)YOU JOIN THE PARTY. YOU BRING 500 GOLD WITH YOU.
Go train to level 5 along with four other heroes, preferably including my fighter and wizard.(6)THE EXPERIENCE BUFFER BREAKS AGAIN. SOMEBODY REALLY NEEDS TO FIX THAT.
Sail the seas looking for booty!(5)YOU PILLAGE A SHIP AND SET SAIL.
YOU FORGOT LYEOS ACTIONOOPS.
THIS ONE:Bang sword against tree to make terrible music.
Financially advise the Hero Nation.(3)YOU DON'T KNOW MUCH ABOUT FINANCE, SO YOUR ADVICE IS PRETTY MUCH USELESS.
(5)YOU DECIDE TO JOURNEY TO THE TOWER OF PLOT REVELATIONS.((*looks at map* Tower of Plot Revelations = Tower of Plot Twists?))
Heal other people((you missed this one action))
Go on quest to fix XP buffer, obtain reward.Assist with this