Post by: Robocorn on May 10, 2010, 07:55:41 pm
Quotes
Let us be frank, gentlemen. Killer herds of undead grazing animals? Battle donkeys? Identical goblins? Dedicated necropoli? Artifice barrels? Slime lakes? Shit monsters? Forgotten beast incursions through artifact gem windows? Anti-gravity miners with fey moods?
Battlefailed is 2010's Boatmurdered.
Together, through combined effort and force of will, we have created something to compare to that cthonian abyss from which so many dwarven legends have sprung. We have forged a new level of hell.
And it's not even over yet.
My god... this was a terrible idea.
My adventurer scout died rather quickly. I don't want to talk about it, it was like something H.P Lovecraft would write.
EDIT: I just told my mother about this fort. She got two impressions from it:
1) "That doesn't even sound salvageable."
2) "Random Primal Horrors would be a great name for a rock band."
Flavourful Introduction
"Ber! Ber Betanlorbam!""yes m' queen?"
"Do you know why I have dragged you into my throne room."
"Eh...Is it cause ye' caught me in bed with yer daught-"
"Yes! Mr. Betanlorbam!"
"I can explain m' queen, with a beard like that I coulda' sworn she was a dwarf-"
"Silence! I've put up with your kind for long enough, with your drunken revelry and your unkempt facial hair!"
"yer daughter wishes 'er beard was braided lik-"
"Silence! I'm sparing your miserable little life for now Betanlorbam, perhaps you could show some gratitude.
"Yes oh glorious Led, jewel of the obsidian towers of Graspedseduce, flower of the goblin's grave etc...high strung bit--
"That is why I'm financing your little trip."
"My what?"
"That's right Ber, you're going on a trip, straight to the Blueness of Malodors in fact"
"What're ye' talkin' 'bout ya' crazy broa-?"
"I encourage you to take as many of your brethren with you to start your new dwarven paradise halfway across this Windy world"
"Jus' wait a minut' he-"
"We'll supply you of course, picks, axes, liquor, whatever will get you hairy ragamuffings out of my sigh-"
"ye say ye'll giv' me booze?!"
"ahem. yes."
"I'll do it!"
Statistical Introduction
We'll be starting here, halfway between The Blueness of Malodors and The Plain of Ooze both terrifying biomes.(http://img706.imageshack.us/img706/3876/embark.gif)
The map contains little fresh water or abilities to get stone (it's not impossible) and all of the wildlife will likely be hostile undead, meaning we can only eat what we grow and only drink from wells or booze. I am predicting zombie whales in the future so be on your toes.
Fun Fact:
This world was genned remarkably hot and dry, with the maximum number of titans and an unreasonably low set parameter for attracting their attention (around population of 30 I think).
Last Living Save
Here (http://dffd.wimbli.com/download.php?id=2903&f=Battlefailed_Spring_514.rar)
Final Save
Here (http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/Battlefailed_TheEnd.zip)
Post by: Robocorn on May 10, 2010, 07:55:58 pm
Playing Order
1. Robocorn 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1244829#msg1244829), 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1248021#msg1248021), 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1248514#msg1248514), 4 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1254386#msg1254386)2. Andreus 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1256315#msg1256315), 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1262179#msg1262179), 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1262349#msg1262349), 4 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1262459#msg1262459), 5 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1264317#msg1264317), 6 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1264487#msg1264487), 7 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1264656#msg1264656)
3. Urist Imiknorris 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1266817#msg1266817), 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1267103#msg1267103), 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1269678#msg1269678),
4. Matuin 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1269882#msg1269882), 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1269928#msg1269928)
5. Samthere 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1289714#msg1289714), 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1291933#msg1291933), 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1293626#msg1293626)
6. Oglokoog 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1298145#msg1298145)
7. Seth Creiyd 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1309121#msg1309121), 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1310176#msg1310176), 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1310312#msg1310312), 4 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1310520#msg1310520), 5 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1310608#msg1310608)
8. Zathel 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1313944#msg1313944), 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1315751#msg1315751), 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1320633#msg1320633), 4 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1323593#msg1323593)
9. Turkey XIII 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1341661#msg1341661), 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1344102#msg1344102), 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1346734#msg1346734), 4 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1351752#msg1351752)
10. Melkorp 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1354243#msg1354243), 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1368572#msg1368572), 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1371613#msg1371613), 4 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1389204#msg1389204), 5 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1390282#msg1390282), 6 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1390840#msg1390840)
11. Andreus 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1391272#msg1391272), 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1391568#msg1391568), 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1391669#msg1391669), 4 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1391716#msg1391716), 5 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1391742#msg1391742), 6 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1391802#msg1391802), 7 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1391971#msg1391971), 8 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1392579#msg1392579)
12. Robocorn 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1394807#msg1394807), 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1401348#msg1401348), 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1402950#msg1402950), 4 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1406238#msg1406238), 5 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1406317#msg1406317)
13. Seth Creiyd 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1407665#msg1407665), 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1408008#msg1408008), 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1409235#msg1409235), 4 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1409549#msg1409549), 5 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1410080#msg1410080), 6 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1410773#msg1410773), 7 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1410827#msg1410827), 8 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1410961#msg1410961), 9 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1412795#msg1412795), 10 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1413356#msg1413356), 11 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1414928#msg1414928), 12 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1416269#msg1416269), 13 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1417979#msg1417979), 14 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1421092#msg1421092), 15 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1423614#msg1423614), 16 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1423826#msg1423826), 17 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1428574#msg1428574), 18 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1428890#msg1428890), 19 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1429037#msg1429037), 20 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1429131#msg1429131), 21 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1429263#msg1429263)
14. Pisano 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1430377#msg1430377), 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1431654#msg1431654), 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1433295#msg1433295), 4 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1434268#msg1434268), 5 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1434720#msg1434720), 6 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1436038#msg1436038), 7 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1437133#msg1437133), 8 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1438759#msg1438759)
15. Zathel 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1441650#msg1441650), 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1446295#msg1446295), 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1451024#msg1451024), 4 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1461576#msg1461576), 5 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1463380#msg1463380)
16.Andreus 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1468087#msg1468087), 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1469178#msg1469178), 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1470667#msg1470667), 4 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1470960#msg1470960), 5 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1472983#msg1472983), 6 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1473159#msg1473159), 7 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1473403#msg1473403), 8 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1473638#msg1473638), 9 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1473694#msg1473694), 10 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1473997#msg1473997), 11 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1474197#msg1474197) Fall of Battlefailed.
A sequel has been made called FailCannon (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=64258.0)
A continuation of failcannon was made called Hellcannon (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg2740715#msg2740715)
Bryan Derksen reclaimed Battlefailed here (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=76193.msg1929368#msg1929368)
Post by: Robocorn on May 10, 2010, 07:56:17 pm
Post by: Leesin on May 10, 2010, 07:59:02 pm
EDIT: Oh yeah, if you do want him to start as woodworker guy, but if you ever in the future get any woodworkers etc that can take his place, he would very much like to go into the military as an axe dwarf :). No problem if you prefer not to though :P.
Post by: Krimson on May 10, 2010, 08:02:20 pm
Also hit me up for a spot, Preferably round 5, (Never played an ocean map so dont really want to be in on the ground-work here,)
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 10, 2010, 08:03:59 pm
Name: Urist the Blue
Profession: Berserking Metalcrafter
Skills: Proficient Axedwarf, Adequate Shield User, Adequate Armor User, Novice Metalcrafter (so I don't get "relieved from duty" thoughts)
Items: Get me a bronze battle axe. Buy it or make one yerself, all works out in tha' end. Works out ta a buncha' zombie bits everywhere, it does.
I'll take round 3.
I have ideas for names for the fort and group.
Group name: Zan Usān, "The Artifact of Murder."
Fort Name: Angdurad Angduradlibashnil Ucat, "Redbeard the Red Bearded Axe-Hammer of Beer." Or "...of Ale" instead of beer.
Post by: CutieBard on May 10, 2010, 08:04:17 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 10, 2010, 08:05:48 pm
The last one please, Dobar, either a woodcutter/wood worker guy or you can give him no points and just use him to haul/draft into the military. :) And obviously give him the same name as my forum name :D.Got it done, made mostly carpenter and woodcutter, but also competent axedwarf (don't want to die do you?), where do you want to be placed on the play list?
Post by: Leesin on May 10, 2010, 08:10:21 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 10, 2010, 08:12:08 pm
Post by: CutieBard on May 10, 2010, 08:13:57 pm
Post by: Krimson on May 10, 2010, 08:14:05 pm
Post by: Andreus on May 10, 2010, 08:14:31 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 10, 2010, 08:22:06 pm
Reading the intro, I'm wondering what race our queen is?Led Shakeoars. Is the human queen of a goblin civilization that we are evidently a part of. Weird ain't it.
Post by: Robocorn on May 10, 2010, 08:23:08 pm
Is round 2 still available?Sure, community fort guys didn't ask for placement.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 10, 2010, 08:23:23 pm
Also, it's spelled "Succession."
Post by: Robocorn on May 10, 2010, 08:26:25 pm
Also, it's spelled "Succession."got it.
We still need
two more players to get started. I'll dorf Andreus as whatever unless he asks.
Post by: Andreus on May 10, 2010, 08:27:41 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 10, 2010, 08:30:07 pm
I'll take Dobar. Nickname Andreus, profession "Death Consultant". Proficient Weaponsmith.got it.
Oh also, I vote for the fortress name of Nokzamungeg - "Battlefailed".got that too
Post by: Andreus on May 10, 2010, 08:42:16 pm
Post by: Matuin on May 10, 2010, 09:12:06 pm
I also vote for Battlefailed.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 10, 2010, 09:14:08 pm
I'm still adamant on the group being "The Artifact of Murder," though.
Post by: Samthere on May 10, 2010, 09:20:41 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 10, 2010, 09:29:35 pm
I'll take any dwarf, please, nickname 'Samrek'. I'd also happily take a turn in succession!
got you down man. you're a doctor, a pretty good one in fact, and the only trained engraver. got you named and everything.
Post by: Oglokoog on May 11, 2010, 02:20:48 am
- Vote for Battlefailed.
- Want a dwarf, but you pick the skills please.
- Want to play for a turn. I know I am going to regret this, but the embark site is too good to pass...
Post by: SethCreiyd on May 11, 2010, 03:29:13 am
Post by: Ilmoran on May 11, 2010, 01:07:15 pm
Post by: Zathel on May 11, 2010, 01:12:25 pm
Post by: heyguys on May 11, 2010, 01:18:45 pm
I see this is the fort referenced in the other thread. I'm in. Sign me up for the next available turn.
If we have not embarked yet, then I'll Take Udib Zatemlogan (or any available embark Dwarf), posted on the first page (slow to tire and clumsy, that one)
Name: HeyGuys
Profession: Maker
Skills:
The Skill one Down from Proficient Metalsmith
The Skill one down from Proficient Gem Setter
Novice AxeDwarf
Novice Dodger
I'll make awesome furniture and bedazzle it.
edit: However, If we HAVE embarked, then i'll sill take Udib (or whatever available Dwarf) and whatever skills he currently has; but if he doesn't have useful fortress survival or historical crafting skills, draft him into the military.
edit: a vote for battlefailed
Post by: Robocorn on May 11, 2010, 02:31:39 pm
(http://img543.imageshack.us/img543/1237/dorflineup.gif)
Post by: Areku on May 11, 2010, 02:40:56 pm
Post by: IronVanguard on May 11, 2010, 03:04:13 pm
Post by: Matuin on May 11, 2010, 04:38:54 pm
Post by: heyguys on May 11, 2010, 06:49:27 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 11, 2010, 07:31:41 pm
How come I wasn't dwarfed? = /Not sure, I guess the whole confusion of the thing messed me up. Are there any migrant classes you prefer?
Post by: Matuin on May 11, 2010, 08:03:53 pm
How come I wasn't dwarfed? = /Not sure, I guess the whole confusion of the thing messed me up. Are there any migrant classes you prefer?
Smith.
Post by: Robocorn on May 11, 2010, 09:44:53 pm
After a pretty long journey we finally arrived at the place that Led told us to. A pretty queer place really. The grass is all dead an' th' beach has no sand. An' one more thing, when they say th' Blueness of Malodors, they damn well mean it! th' sea stinks of piss n' dead cats. That queen'll be hearin' from me when that dangblasted liaison gets here.
They brave dorfs I brought with me aren't much better. The bastards drank all me booze and one of 'em carved BaTtleFAiLeD int' the side o' th' wagon. Non o' 'em fessed up for it but when we finally arrived here they chose to name the place Battlefailed. I've got th' documents t' prove it.
(http://img706.imageshack.us/img706/9013/arrived.gif)
I told th' miner, Oglosomething. t' dig out our rooms while some o' the axedwarves made themselves of some use getting us wood from the dead trees surroundin' us. I dinnae know what is supposed to be so scary about this place, just an ordinary plain fulla ordinary elk. What in the blue blazes is that thing?!
(http://img138.imageshack.us/img138/2599/19471808.gif)
The thing jumps on th' doctor Samrek an he takes a good beatin' before Urist an' Oglokoog come to ward th' vile creature off o' him.
(http://img37.imageshack.us/img37/6046/29642423.gif)
The two brave dorfs fight the beast but it kicks oglokoog int' th' water.I watch in horror as th' dorf sinks beneath th' waves. It probably would have made no difference whether or not he was actually using his pick,at least he didn't carry it with him to his watery grave.
(http://img535.imageshack.us/img535/505/42492864.gif)
as th' battle goes on heyguys joins the fray. with not a weap'n o' his own he grapples with th' fell beast. Through sheer force of will and the fire in 'is 'eart, he unsurmounted strength and wrestling skill.
(http://img541.imageshack.us/img541/394/51657465.gif)
With undwarven strength, our humble Maker, unmade mbs th' beast enough t' keep it at bay. and collapsed t' the ground unconscious. Nobody seemd t'think he could use a lift.
(http://img33.imageshack.us/img33/263/86905411.gif)
Not bein' a miner myself, I hastily dig out a small burrow for us to take refuge in. Oglokoog was th' miner of us. I wonder if I'll get 'is share o' booze...
(http://img94.imageshack.us/img94/958/95877618.gif)
End of first MONTH.
I may need a little longer to finish the year, the undead caught me off guard, and these were Elk. enjoy this segment. Sorry Oglokoog.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 11, 2010, 09:52:56 pm
They. Will. PAY.
I was the one who carved "Battlefailed" into the wagon.
Post by: Krimson on May 11, 2010, 09:54:00 pm
Post by: Samthere on May 11, 2010, 09:59:16 pm
Give it to me straight, doc. What are my chances? :D
But hey, rightfully I oughta be the one under those waves, so by {whomever I worshop/Armok} I'll hang on as long as I can.
Is it possible for a dorf to diagnose themself?
Post by: Andreus on May 11, 2010, 10:04:36 pm
Post by: heyguys on May 11, 2010, 11:26:38 pm
edit: at any rate it takes some crazy dice rolls to go through enough turns of wrestling with a skeletal being to go from dabbling to elite.
Post by: Krimson on May 11, 2010, 11:36:06 pm
Post by: TurkeyXIII on May 11, 2010, 11:43:43 pm
Also, what version are you using?
Post by: Oglokoog on May 12, 2010, 02:02:28 am
(preferably as "Oglokoog II." so I can keep track of how many times I've died :D)
Post by: Zathel on May 12, 2010, 02:37:47 am
OH THE PAIN OH THE PAIN OH THE PAIN NOBODY IN MEDICAL SCHOOL TOLD ME BEING A DOCTOR WOULD HURT THIS MUCH
Give it to me straight, doc. What are my chances? :D
But hey, rightfully I oughta be the one under those waves, so by {whomever I worshop/Armok} I'll hang on as long as I can.
Is it possible for a dorf to diagnose themself?
I'm not sure, but I don't think so. However, these are all bruises and minor wounds, it's highly probable they'll be gone by themselves in a while. Unless something was broken.
Post by: Matuin on May 12, 2010, 03:13:54 am
OH THE PAIN OH THE PAIN OH THE PAIN NOBODY IN MEDICAL SCHOOL TOLD ME BEING A DOCTOR WOULD HURT THIS MUCH
Give it to me straight, doc. What are my chances? :D
But hey, rightfully I oughta be the one under those waves, so by {whomever I worshop/Armok} I'll hang on as long as I can.
Is it possible for a dorf to diagnose themself?
I'm not sure, but I don't think so. However, these are all bruises and minor wounds, it's highly probable they'll be gone by themselves in a while. Unless something was broken.
It's worth it to have another dwarf diagnose it; just dont let em treat it. No telling what'll happen with an untrained treatment...
Also, pure win. I can't wait until my turn.
Post by: Zathel on May 12, 2010, 04:02:22 am
OH THE PAIN OH THE PAIN OH THE PAIN NOBODY IN MEDICAL SCHOOL TOLD ME BEING A DOCTOR WOULD HURT THIS MUCH
Give it to me straight, doc. What are my chances? :D
But hey, rightfully I oughta be the one under those waves, so by {whomever I worshop/Armok} I'll hang on as long as I can.
Is it possible for a dorf to diagnose themself?
I'm not sure, but I don't think so. However, these are all bruises and minor wounds, it's highly probable they'll be gone by themselves in a while. Unless something was broken.
It's worth it to have another dwarf diagnose it; just dont let em treat it. No telling what'll happen with an untrained treatment...
Also, pure win. I can't wait until my turn.
I must say that I disagree. A bad diagnosis is much worse than bad treatment, especially since hospital system is somewhat bugged now.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 12, 2010, 06:57:34 am
OH THE PAIN OH THE PAIN OH THE PAIN NOBODY IN MEDICAL SCHOOL TOLD ME BEING A DOCTOR WOULD HURT THIS MUCH
Give it to me straight, doc. What are my chances? :D
But hey, rightfully I oughta be the one under those waves, so by {whomever I worshop/Armok} I'll hang on as long as I can.
Is it possible for a dorf to diagnose themself?
I'm not sure, but I don't think so. However, these are all bruises and minor wounds, it's highly probable they'll be gone by themselves in a while. Unless something was broken.
Judging by this
(http://img37.imageshack.us/img37/6046/29642423.gif)
I'd say that he's pretty broken.
Post by: Ilmoran on May 12, 2010, 07:44:48 am
Judging by thisOH THE PAIN OH THE PAIN OH THE PAIN NOBODY IN MEDICAL SCHOOL TOLD ME BEING A DOCTOR WOULD HURT THIS MUCH
Give it to me straight, doc. What are my chances? :D
But hey, rightfully I oughta be the one under those waves, so by {whomever I worshop/Armok} I'll hang on as long as I can.
Is it possible for a dorf to diagnose themself?
I'm not sure, but I don't think so. However, these are all bruises and minor wounds, it's highly probable they'll be gone by themselves in a while. Unless something was broken.
(http://img37.imageshack.us/img37/6046/29642423.gif)
I'd say that he's pretty broken.
Not really.
Source of wound colors: http://df.magmawiki.com/index.php/Wounds
Edit: Got yellow and brown backward.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 12, 2010, 08:01:15 am
Quote
MINOR: Any damage that doesn't have functional/structural consequences (might be heavy bleeding though).
INHIBITED: Any muscular, structural or functional damage without total loss.
a. Yellow is worse.
Post by: Samthere on May 12, 2010, 08:08:08 am
b. Why do these forums show brown as dark red?
Code: [Select]
[color=#808000]MINOR:[/color]MINOR:
Post by: heyguys on May 12, 2010, 03:15:35 pm
Post by: Oglokoog on May 12, 2010, 04:52:32 pm
Quote from: Current Development
Saves from DF 0.31.01 and later will be compatible.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 12, 2010, 05:33:40 pm
A little OT, but relevant to our collective interests:Quote from: Current DevelopmentSaves from DF 0.31.01 and later will be compatible.Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: Robocorn on May 12, 2010, 07:59:27 pm
Diary of Robocorn Betanlorbam
My damn dwarfs say that th' Skelk that K.O.'d Heyguys is still active an' that it'll get 'em if they get close. I tell Urist t' go take care of it, the psycho seems pretty thrilled about fighting the undead monstrosity.
While they're out fighting the first skelk, a second one runs into th' hole where we currently reside an' starts buttin th' hell out o' the spare dog I brought fer food.
(http://img22.imageshack.us/img22/567/67272380.gif)
The dog seemed to be doomed but at least it was doomed effectively. Urist is currently laying in th' same spot as heyguys in similar condition having done no damage t' th' skelk.
(http://img245.imageshack.us/img245/2311/24602588.gif)
As The battle raging on our front door is scaring Samrek and Andreus away I choose to lead them t' a distant shore t' hide. A good thing too, a horde o' th' abominations comes trottin' out righ' through where we made our camp, chasin' away our heroic dog.
(http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/968/76987261.gif)
While we hide on th' north part o' th' shore The skelks break into what would have been our domicile.
(http://img14.imageshack.us/img14/4195/55518319.gif)
By the time we're almost done with our protection, a damn skelk comes out o' nowhere and attacks one o' our dogs, scarin' us from th' relative safey we enjoyed.
(http://img100.imageshack.us/img100/4084/39514297.gif)
We make a break fer it to a distant tree in hopes we could avoid th' damned thing. They were becoming kind of a pain.
we arrive hungry and tired and incredibly hung over from not getting a consistent supply o' booze th' whole time.
Heyguys an' Urist seem to be fine comparably, enjoying a carefree coma being slowly broken to pieces by the skelks. They seem so blissfully unaware that they haven't eaten or drank in months. Woulda been nice if Urist hadn't brought
th' axe with 'im, could o' used that about now.
(http://img185.imageshack.us/img185/9937/30099953.gif)
The time 'ad come, in a drunken frenzy, we mad a break for th' sweet booze an' toadman brains in the stockpile. It's almost like th' elk were guardin' it th' whole time.
The dwarfs scattered, I dunnae about their craft, but they make good decoys, I at least got t' th' booze.
(http://img192.imageshack.us/img192/609/11231552.gif)
I had fleeting thoughts of walling myself in with th' food...
Maybe not fleeting...
...Well I didn't do that, what would everyone think of me?
I walled myself in with Krimson!
(http://img227.imageshack.us/img227/3528/89988249.gif)
I hear their footsteps outside. I could really use a good chat with Andreus, I'll just stand here until I can talk to him.
As I've waited in here, Krimson has begun th' construction o' a farm so we can maintain our dwarven lifestyle in the crowded burrow. Soon e'll be saying we should drink from the same mug an' crowd together fer warmth. I ain't buying that, If I swung that way I wouldn't be in this mess. I'll just stand by th' wall.
I think about now Samrek an' Andreus should be constructin' a butchery so as to turn them puppies int' tasty morsels but they keep gettin interrupted woodcuttin' by th' damn skelks. But why would I think that?
(http://img15.imageshack.us/img15/8970/92577778.gif)
Over the following weeks I wait to meet 'em, stopping only from vigilance t' eat. I hear the screams of Andreus as he repeatedly tries to get close t' th' wall only to be chased away by the skelks. I hear the yelping of dogs and the cries of Samrek. I have plenty of food where I am, so it matters not for me, but I cannae help but feign concern.
The second death is Samrek, by dehydration. I dinnae know how, we've got plenty of booze *slurrp*.
Andreus passes from this world also and Krimson throws a tantrum. If by tantrum he means walking to the stairs and calming down, th' guy 'as pretty mild emotions it seems.
I wonder how Urist an' Heyguys are doing...
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
thats all for tonight, it would be easier to get through my turn if interesting things would quit happening, I hope I'll remove some anger by trying to get through a couple of months every day.
Post by: Krimson on May 12, 2010, 08:27:32 pm
Post by: heyguys on May 12, 2010, 08:33:42 pm
Anyway, reading through that I totally expected the fortress to die entirely. Quick question: Did our expedition leader die? If not then we are safe and the game remains fully functional and viable.
edit: By the way, don't get discouraged! You have already done an admirable job being able to turtle yourself in with the food. If you survive through this turn it will be the start of an epic [fun filled] adventure!
Post by: Samthere on May 12, 2010, 08:39:28 pm
The second death is Samrek, by dehydration. I dinnae know how, we've got plenty of booze *slurrp*.I didn't have any booze, and I drank sea water out of desperation :D
Redorf when possible, please! As Samzul, this time :D
I don't even know what light blue eyeballs means, but I can tell you it probably doesn't involve having the ability to see anymoreFUNCTION LOSS: An important function of the part is completely lost, but the part is structurally sound (or at least partially intact).
Kicked in the face until blind.
Post by: Krimson on May 12, 2010, 08:42:55 pm
Post by: heyguys on May 12, 2010, 08:43:13 pm
In other news in my private fortress I had the entire fort massacred by a magma man who could not be killed by wrestlers. That made me mad, but I was happy about this update.
I'll request a Redwarf from the next group of migrants that survive long enough to make it into safety.
Name: HeyGuys II
Profession: Brother
edit: I can't imagine that we have any picks. For that matter I have no idea how we will get farms either.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 12, 2010, 08:45:49 pm
RAGE. KILL THE UNDEAD.
Will redorf on my turn.
Post by: Robocorn on May 12, 2010, 09:15:53 pm
Do we have picks in our possesion or are they all outside?
you've got the only one inside buddy.
...Still alive man, you may win a gold in the pain olympics. you have no teeth, are blind, all of the bones in your hands are broken (ALL of them) and you've been in a coma for three months.
RAGE. KILL THE UNDEAD.
Will redorf on my turn.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 12, 2010, 09:24:14 pm
Still alive man, you may win a gold in the pain olympics. you have no teeth, are blind, all of the bones in your hands are broken (ALL of them) and you've been in a coma for three months.
I highly doubt I'll survive the next two years.
EDIT: I'm more wounded than Heyguys, and he's been there longer. I'm like the dwarven Terminator, I just won't ****ing die. If I'm still alive by autumn, find a way to drop a cave-in on me.
Post by: Krimson on May 12, 2010, 10:03:10 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 12, 2010, 10:36:51 pm
Post by: Matuin on May 12, 2010, 11:23:24 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 12, 2010, 11:40:13 pm
Diary of Robocorn Betanlorbam
It has come to my attention that our expedition leader Andreus may never be gracin' our humble halls so that I'll never get to have that final conversation with him, I can only hope enshal Dawnfuture delivers this message to him "Do you think Led was born with that stick up 'er bum, or do you think it involved some accident involving a flagpole and fallin' off an obsidian tower?" I wound up getting my booze, but it tastes bitter without someone t' share it with, well krimson's here an' he's a great help, but I dinnae want th' representative from Graspedseduc'd t' get th' wrong impression when he finds our one bed and our brotherly platonic relationship.Krimson keeps doing this strange thing where he has a tantrum in his sleep. It seems to bother me but since I have yet t' lift a finger since we got down here, I ain't complainin' of his night terrors.
The silly dorf toppled th' mason workshop, he then put it back together. doesn't bother me in the slightest, as long as he cleans up.
(http://img641.imageshack.us/img641/2664/44075162.gif)
This guy is nuts, he loses his temper constantly an' he takes it out on th' rocks. I'm sure e'll get over it eventually.
The f**ker attacked me, Robocorn ain't takin' this sittin' down!
I guess I am now that th' motherf**ker broke both my legs!!
(http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/1269/34831819.gif)
Arright, I can kind o' understand the fist fight, an all th' tension we be havin' bu I'm not really in a situation to do any work at all now, as long as e's alright he should be able to wait on me head and foot. Bastard deserves to.
Stop takin' a f**kin' break an get me t' Th' F**kin' bed!
(http://img405.imageshack.us/img405/2931/97579642.gif)
It's been weeks, th' bastard 'as been takin' 'is break fer weeks. I cannae get up an get a drink an th' bastard win nae carry me t' th' bed a couple o' feet away. Is this how it ends fer me? alone with this phsycho. where he'll toil alone in Battlefailed forever and do who knows what to my corpse. I accept my fate fer know, what would motivate a person t' come t' th' Blueness o' Malodors anyway?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
These migrants are th' bet thing that ever happened t' me, they put my ornery bum in bed an' brought another pick an' axe with 'em, they'll not make th' mistakes I did. Though they do seem a bit dissappointed at th' state o' things, they said that Led told them o' a grand dwarven utopia, well, welcome t' Battlefailed.
(http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/3512/16679493.gif)
Can I see my thoughts screen?If you want a quick laugh here it is
Spoiler: Urist the Blue's thoughts (click to show/hide)
Post by: SethCreiyd on May 13, 2010, 01:25:22 am
Post by: heyguys on May 13, 2010, 01:44:21 am
edit: oh wait, that's right, we have no natural water. fuck.
Post by: Zathel on May 13, 2010, 02:23:09 am
Build some beds! hopefull they can carry the rest of the extremely wounded back to safety where they can stay in a coma for the next thirty years as they naturally heal.
edit: oh wait, that's right, we have no natural water. fuck.
I think that due to a bug, building a well over source of salt water turns it drinkable. I guess dwarfs install desalinization filters in all their wells or something.
Post by: heyguys on May 13, 2010, 04:03:13 am
Check the nobles screen. We're basically fucked if we can't appoint nobles.
According to Magmawiki, once we grow sufficiently in size we get the equivalent when the dwarves vote on a mayor.
Post by: Matuin on May 13, 2010, 04:19:21 am
Check the nobles screen. We're basically fucked if we can't appoint nobles.
According to Magmawiki, once we grow sufficiently in size we get the equivalent when the dwarves vote on a mayor.
We have to have 50 dwarfs to get a mayor.
This'll be fun..
Post by: heyguys on May 13, 2010, 04:37:45 am
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 13, 2010, 07:07:05 am
EDIT: Oh my god I'm still happy. HOW AM I NOT MISERABLE. Oh wait, I probably have Kirby music stuck in my head.
EDIT2: Why is my dwarf so broken? Her thoughts screen shows her as "basically unbreakable, incredibly quick to heal, mighty, and very agile." I have GONE BEYOND THE IMPOSSIBLE.
Post by: Krimson on May 13, 2010, 09:06:43 am
Post by: Andreus on May 13, 2010, 12:35:55 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 13, 2010, 01:01:56 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 13, 2010, 01:26:35 pm
I wouldnt have broke ye legs had ye not been about to burn the booze for warmth. You claim I was the insane one pfft.Its summer ya daft twit!, I was gettin' a drink. No honest dwarf in 'is right mind'd burn booze, especially not in this swelterin' climate!
Post by: Krimson on May 13, 2010, 01:45:43 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 13, 2010, 05:27:24 pm
Diary of Robocorn Betanlorbam
Th' new dwarves are a boon t' me senses, doing all th' work I never planned on doing an' carrying in all th' items we left outside.
(http://img205.imageshack.us/img205/4598/34954223.gif)
It surely is a blessing that something distracted th' skelks so they could all get in. I haven't seen skelk in quite a while. I wonder what happen'd t' all o' them.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
27 Malachite, 501.
A chillran through me spine, Heyguys, who 'ad endured being teabagg't by skelks for no less'n five months 'ad drawn 'is last breath. Let us nau remembra 'im as a pacifist bu' as a man who could be kick'd in th' face fer months on en' an' nau die. I salute ye' Heyguys.
(http://img714.imageshack.us/img714/4640/35751733.gif)
today I found a nice juicy plump helmet in th' food stockpile. I hid it away in a crack in th' wall be'ind a barrel so nobody would get it before me. I'll enjoy it tomorrow with some dwarven wine an' enjoy th' good times.
Diary of interim scribe Erib Shembidok, Fish Dissector
Thah right queer dwarf that was always mumblin' t' 'imself was finally taken out. Fer some reason Krimson wanted me t' make a reprt o' this so I did. He says e'll find someone else t' do it when 'e 'as th' time an' that I be useless cuz there be no fish in th' cave.
So, this righ' mad dorf named Bobbycon or somethin' starts ravin' 'bout how someone touch'd 'is plump helmet an' how he was gon o' kill every las' one o' us fer ruinin' 'is day. Th' mad dorf ran t' th' craftworks an' tried t' attack someone so good ol' Krimson decared't everybody 'is Granite Gods an' told us t' stop Robconnel at any cos'. We all ran int' th' romm an' grabb't the sucker an' pulled. Th' guy was strong but there were five o' us. as 'e struggle't, Reg Mafoludar strangle't th' rampagin' psycho until e' fell down dead.
(http://img8.imageshack.us/img8/2404/15954037.gif)
Ev'n afterwards we all felt righ' sorry fer wha' we done, Krimson was th' most sadden't by th' loss o' 'is friend, 'e told us t' make a tomb fer Ropercon cuz 'e deserv'd one an t' clean up th' blood. I think I may come t' enjoy this job, I look forward t' chronicling th' events in Battlefailed
(http://img526.imageshack.us/img526/1858/54640383.gif)
Diary of interim scribe Dīshmab Obokidos, Herbalist
I guess it's my turn t' write everything down, I hope I don't succumb t' th' same fate as that other scribe, why would that happen? He was a useless fish dissector, I'm a herbalist.(http://img18.imageshack.us/img18/8205/55076643.gif)
Krimson killed Erib in a fit o' rage after th' death of his
Krimson knocked out Likast before calming down, it must be pretty stressful running this place. He said to make a coffin for Erib too, so he doesn't smell, a wise decision.
I'm a little freaked out now, Krimson struck down Likast in the hall in another fit of rage, maybe we should have that guy quarantined.
(http://img230.imageshack.us/img230/4876/93533971.gif)
These outburst are becoming a little less bearable. The maddwarf broke my arm and leg and is currently beating up Matuin like there's no tomorow.
(http://img98.imageshack.us/img98/8521/41783353.gif)
Thankfully he stops short o' killing him before calming down.
(http://img26.imageshack.us/img26/4864/94516238.gif)
With Matuin's vote I've replaced him as militia leader.
As Matuin and I lie on the floor for weeks with major injuries, Krimson puts forth a plan to create arable farmland in our fort, his idea involves flooding it slightly with seawater, When I tell him that not even plump helmets would grow in the sand from the bottom of the blueness of malodors, he just laughs at me and marks the wall anyway.
(http://img37.imageshack.us/img37/3023/70218055.gif)
I'm beginning to learn why Likast and Erib are still rotting in the halls, Krimson has been dedicating empty coffins to people I've never even heard of.
(http://img163.imageshack.us/img163/5514/72346622.gif)
It takes longer than I thought for them to put away the corpses, they at least bring Matuin to the bed to heal, somewhere along the line they construct a well to give us water.
(http://img94.imageshack.us/img94/9573/60065950.gif)
Krimson has been having a good day lately, he's ready to flood the farms.
(http://img153.imageshack.us/img153/4188/66010558.gif)
FUUUUUUCCKK!!!!
The game didn't end because Urist is being immortal.
Well, I guess we vote, savescum or Andreus reclaims?
I really need an aspirin.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 13, 2010, 05:28:35 pm
Dammit, I want to see just how badly I'm being beaten. And how long it takes me to die. How many skelks are attacking me?!
Note to self: Robocorn makes forts epic.
EDIT:
(http://www.no2id.net/images/cartoons/NO2ID_press_on.jpg)
Post by: Krimson on May 13, 2010, 05:32:23 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 13, 2010, 05:42:36 pm
That was fucking epic, I so rock >_> <_< Told ye ye shouldnt have kept me from ye bed o.o I am AWESOM, Anyway did everyone die? Ones left alive huh? Should really save every 3 hours to keep your sanity. Anyway, Why did that happen? Always keep the doors locked and make sure the floodgate/lever are on hand :c
They were, the whole z level of the fortress flash flooded 7/7 in one frame.
Dammit, I want to see just how badly I'm being beaten. And how long it takes me to die. How many skelks are attacking me?!
Six, you're even more broken than before but outlived heyguys by not getting a cut making you effectively a pulverized pile of flesh.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 13, 2010, 06:08:49 pm
Have I won the pain olympics yet? I've won, haven't I?
Post by: Krimson on May 13, 2010, 06:21:55 pm
Post by: melkorp on May 13, 2010, 07:05:21 pm
Also, this is the funniest thread in a while.
Also, I want in! Gimme gimme! Turn 15 or whatever. Battlefailed should be extremely Fun by the time you get to me.
Post by: Andreus on May 13, 2010, 07:25:13 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 13, 2010, 07:26:41 pm
Post by: Samthere on May 13, 2010, 07:47:13 pm
I don't mind if it's reclaimed or savescummed. I'd ever so slightly prefer scummed so that I can reclaim my name, 'cos Samrek's a lot catchier than Samzul. :P
But it's not a big deal.
Post by: Oglokoog on May 14, 2010, 01:41:20 am
Post by: Zathel on May 14, 2010, 04:40:07 am
And for irrigation, use a pump. The water pressure can be fucking insane. One time I avoided flooding my entire fortress with a brook only because I'm a paranoid freak when it comes to experimental construction projects and I installed triple failsafe mechanisms.
Post by: Robocorn on May 14, 2010, 05:37:52 am
Post by: Samthere on May 14, 2010, 05:40:28 am
But a damn sexy skeleton!
Post by: Krimson on May 14, 2010, 07:23:35 am
Post by: Andreus on May 14, 2010, 11:11:44 am
Post by: Matuin on May 14, 2010, 12:22:47 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 14, 2010, 01:25:48 pm
Just remember my tantrum that killed you off,
Your tantrum killed a fish dissector and a weaver, I was taken down for going berserk. you were doing pretty well up until then.
Post by: Krimson on May 14, 2010, 01:54:53 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 14, 2010, 02:02:05 pm
I vote on Savescumming, but either is fine. Continuing is pointless; on the offchance we actually DO survive to see migrants (He's gotta die of thirst soon), they're just going to get massacred by the skelks anyways =P
I could possibly survive that long, o ye of little faith. Do you not know who I am? I AM URIST THE BLUE THE IMMORTAL!
Post by: Zathel on May 14, 2010, 02:16:04 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 14, 2010, 02:24:51 pm
Do you think you'll manage to get the farms running? It's not like we can hunt or gather stuff to survive.yeah, we've got enough food for the rest of my year and aquifer water that doesn't asplode.
Post by: Zathel on May 14, 2010, 03:33:33 pm
Post by: Krimson on May 14, 2010, 04:04:50 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 14, 2010, 04:12:33 pm
Post by: Matuin on May 14, 2010, 11:33:57 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 14, 2010, 11:36:02 pm
Diary of Robocorn Betanlorbam
I awoke in a hot sweat, I 'ad some terrible dream abou' Krimson killin' me an' half th' migrants before floodin' th' whole damn fortress an' destroyin' all we work't for. It was a big relief when I saw th' guy standin' before me. Krimson 'as always been there fer me an' I nev'r really trust'd th' fella. I think I'll make a change, I'll trust this one dwarf unlike all of th' oth'r dwarves that said they check'd th' still fer toxic bubbles, or said thet were of consentin' age, or assur'd me they weren't really human princesses. I'll put that aside fer Krimson. 'E kin 'ave th' bed.
(http://img534.imageshack.us/img534/5201/89699160.gif)
later I saw some daft laddie named Matuin tryin' t' dig t' th' sea t' let th' water in. I dinnae if it were my dream but I told th' bucko t' stop so as not t' kill us all when th' water pressure causes a flood that drowns us all in seconds. told 'im t' go fer the dirt with th' water flowin innit.
(http://img30.imageshack.us/img30/2927/16063385.gif)
While I told th' rest o' 'em t' go collec' th' materials from th' wagon someone built a wall infron' o' 'em I hope they kin get th' wall down afore th' Skelks get 'em. Maybe we should make a drawbridge there instead.
(http://img29.imageshack.us/img29/4361/19526478.gif)
I seem t' get th' impression that me ol' buddy Heyguys 'is no longer among th' living. I feel sad bu' I cannae help but think that this is what 'e would 'ave want'd. As th' goblins say "Gu ek us dotom Mokgaru!" dinnae what it means realleh' but th' queen says it at every funeral so it must be somethin' nice. I'll ded'cate an empty coffin t' 'im 'r somethin'.
(http://img526.imageshack.us/img526/1006/23498364.gif)
As I slowly die o' thirst in me bed I 'ave th' migrants build a well so they can frikkin' give me liquid. after almos' a month th' bugger finally finish it. Water be sour to me ale lovin' lips, but any drink after th' long parchin' is a good one.
(http://img36.imageshack.us/img36/9516/14307964.gif)
I 'ad a few coffins made. Th' ones fer Heyguys an' Oglokoog are purely symbol'c as I wouldn't risk my life t' fish a corpse outta th' sea or wrestle a skelk for one. Samrek an' our original leader Andreus 'r in their tombs tho, may their souls rest'n peace, as th' goblins say "Obu os-usp, emxa-los!"
(http://img210.imageshack.us/img210/4854/74120772.gif)
God's beard! look at all th' fish! If only we could catch these morsels we'd never 'ave t worry about food ever agin! alas they be under th' sea where no dwarf dare get at 'em.
(http://img69.imageshack.us/img69/4484/98562682.gif)
Th' drawbridge 's finally up'n runnin and work'd by a lever craft'd by Matuin, I feel safer already. we kin lower th' bridge in case th' damn skelks ever get us corner'd some other way.
(http://img201.imageshack.us/img201/8783/28420533.gif)
The works been going fine, I dinnae know what I'd do without these bless'd dwarfs. And ye know, between th' velvet lies, theres a truth that's 'ard as steel, the vision never dies, life's a nev'rendin' wheel...yeah...
Diary of interim scribe Erib Shembidok, Fish Dissector
I dinnae wha' I'm soppos't t' write in th' log but Krimson tells me tha' i's me duty t' do so so I do my duty an' write in this darn diary. I sure don' got any fish t' dissec'!I slep' righ' through th' whol' thing but I rememb'r th' fellas talkin' 'bout th' dwarf who always slept in th' hospital bed goin' crazy an' attackin' th' fort. wha' both'rs me is tha th' faker got t' sleep fer months when 'e could really walk.
(http://img18.imageshack.us/img18/5768/98111155.gif)
Krimson told us t' stop 'im at any cost. I dinnae wha' really 'append but Krimson was righ' sad today. Th' poor dorf carry'd th' berserk dorf, Rondocore I think, t' 'is grave. lat'r I saw 'im burnin a 'andful o' dwarven rum while cryin'. I wus gonna chastize 'im fer wastin' booze but I 'eard from Rith that Krimson kill'd a dorf an' that 'e was dang'rous.
I dinnae if I kin trus' Krimsin anymore, th' dorf punches me out an' 'alf kills a 'orse before decidin' evrythin's okay, I dinnae understan' a' all.
(http://img534.imageshack.us/img534/6676/37695938.gif)
Th' fort 'as righ' expand'd since tha' bum Rabiecop died, Krimsin made a new hospital fer th' injured dorfs an is workin' on th' farmlan' an tryin' t' get us a dinin' 'all. I can almost fergiv'm fer burnin' that booze. tha's unfergiv'ble.
(http://img121.imageshack.us/img121/5655/59054121.gif)
Krimsin's a genius! 'is plan t' flood th' farms with groun' water work'd! I bet that ol' cripple Roponcorps couldn't o' thought o' that one, bet 'e would o' tried t' drill a 'ole inna th' sea. Tha's why Krims'n's in charge. still cannae trust 'im round booze tho, guy's a pyr'maniac.
(http://img121.imageshack.us/img121/5655/59054121.gif)
A few newcom'rs arrive'd today, Cog Sexyracks, Stukos Metalballs, Thīkut Dankpants, an' a whole bunch o' others, an some kid named Shamebirth, err shamebrith, which means Handlebell, must get a lotta flak fer 'is name's subtle anagram in 'uman.
(http://img62.imageshack.us/img62/5423/56490246.gif)
Today, Krimson as well as both th' new parties declar'd today, limestone 23. t' be Uristfest, dedicat'd t' our noble savior without whom we wouldn't 'ave been able to get by without being attack'd by skel'tal elk. We're 'avin a shrine ded'cated t' Urist in th' fort, t tell urist we lov 'im even though 'e's likely been braindead fer months.
(http://img189.imageshack.us/img189/5360/57670237.gif)
Great Urist th' Immortal died. Our cel'bration 'as end'd an our safty 'as been put at risk. th' skelks 'ave been freed. from their 'ypnosis an are returnin' t' th' field's Battlefailed is in danger once more. I dinnae think tha' skelks are so dang'rous, bu' Krimson sez they be so I righ' lissen.
Th' thing is, th' Skelk jus' left after Urist died. They were replac'd by muskoxen, not zombie muskoxen, regular muskoxen. It seems t' be th' time t' put urist an' 'eyguys t' bed.
(http://img42.imageshack.us/img42/7241/44396543.gif)
A group o' merchan's actualy come 'ere, everyone's so excit'd tha' we put up a gran' ol' depot righ' mou'side our door.
(http://img17.imageshack.us/img17/6921/37838802.gif)
We dinnae 'ave any goods produc'd so we hockdsome o th' stuff we found on th' corpses o' our forebearers. Samrek won' miss 'is gloves. in exchange we bough' some food an' a cage t' keep all these cats in. there nau be many nae but there will be if we dinnae work preemptivleh.
aroun' our entrance we made a wall t' keep ou' th' skel'tals. We haven't seen any since th' skelks, bu' I cannae imagine a better place t' find death than the blueness o' malod'rs.
(http://img198.imageshack.us/img198/7439/15594606.gif)
How it got in I dinnae know but there's a skeltal buzz'rd in th' lobby attakin' a dog. Th dorfs 'r scrambled t' take 't out.
(http://img10.imageshack.us/img10/9135/97835517.gif)
our crak'd team o' dorfs who wernt fightin' dorfs a min'te ago sprung int' action an' broke th' buzz'rd flat in a secon'. jus' t' be safe we closed th' hatches t' th' outside.
(http://img718.imageshack.us/img718/2402/40812466.gif)
The undead buzz'rd swarm outside but cannae get in due t' our fortifications. In my dreams I've been hearin' a voice, I could use a talk with a expedition leader, but there nau be one 'ere. I guess I'll have t' do as th' goblins say. "ngukak mok-ozod." sometimes I wish tha' so many goblin phrases 'adn't been adopted by our dorf culture, but their whimsical phrases seem t' be all tha's left o' 'em so I dinnae 'arbor any ill feelin's aginst 'em. Only Krimsin, fer burnin' good booze.
Th' voice 'as been stayin' with me. say 'e's Andreus th' former leader of Battlefail'd, it cannae be true, Andreus is dead. th' voice tells me t' take control o' th' fort. I need 'elp.
I kin 'ear th' voice when I be awake now. It tells me orders, I cannae excape 't.
As th' year comes t' an en', th' voice becomes loud'r, sometimes it can move me arm aginst me will. I dinnae want t' tell ye what it makes' me do. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ik1NDo24mG0&feature=related)
I fell meself slippin' away, cannae sleep or Andreus takes control. Cannae let that 'appen.
I cannae be 'elp'd, I cannae hol' on fer any longer. As th' goblins say "Que sera, sera." tha's goblins righ'? This may be my las
(http://img714.imageshack.us/img714/5765/23818506.gif)
That's my turn I'll have The save for Andreus up within the hour. How'd I do?
Save Here (http://download994.mediafire.com/ym5w3y3merzg/tmngnzyoj0l/Battlefailed.zip)
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 14, 2010, 11:53:13 pm
I survived six months of pain? Urist the Blue shall be given a proper burial on my turn (Royal Mausoleum).
Post by: Robocorn on May 14, 2010, 11:55:26 pm
O_o
I survived six months of pain? Urist the Blue shall be given a proper burial on my turn (Royal Mausoleum).
you'll have to settle for grand until then >.>
one of the statues in it was a superior one of you holding a mace (when did that ever happen) but most of them are of a titan that lives in the nearby area. They damn well plastered its image all over your shrine.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 15, 2010, 12:17:17 am
Post by: Krimson on May 15, 2010, 12:23:58 am
Grand job in any case, aquifier needs to be pierced soonish tyvm.
Post by: Matuin on May 15, 2010, 12:30:39 am
O_o
I survived six months of pain? Urist the Blue shall be given a proper burial on my turn (Royal Mausoleum).
you'll have to settle for grand until then >.>
one of the statues in it was a superior one of you holding a mace (when did that ever happen) but most of them are of a titan that lives in the nearby area. They damn well plastered its image all over your shrine.
So awesome. This is one of the best Successions I've read in a long time.
Post by: Oglokoog on May 15, 2010, 02:35:03 am
O_o
I survived six months of pain? Urist the Blue shall be given a proper burial on my turn (Royal Mausoleum).
you'll have to settle for grand until then >.>
one of the statues in it was a superior one of you holding a mace (when did that ever happen) but most of them are of a titan that lives in the nearby area. They damn well plastered its image all over your shrine.
So awesome. This is one of the best Successions I've read in a long time.
And I'm pretty sure it's gonna get better.
Post by: Matuin on May 15, 2010, 02:45:20 am
O_o
I survived six months of pain? Urist the Blue shall be given a proper burial on my turn (Royal Mausoleum).
you'll have to settle for grand until then >.>
one of the statues in it was a superior one of you holding a mace (when did that ever happen) but most of them are of a titan that lives in the nearby area. They damn well plastered its image all over your shrine.
So awesome. This is one of the best Successions I've read in a long time.
And I'm pretty sure it's gonna get better.
That's the best part!
Post by: Zathel on May 15, 2010, 03:24:11 am
It seems like I'll be able to work on the magma pump stack in my term after all.
Post by: Samthere on May 15, 2010, 09:42:40 am
Post by: melkorp on May 15, 2010, 11:47:01 am
Post by: Robocorn on May 15, 2010, 12:32:02 pm
Grand job in any case, aquifier needs to be pierced soonish tyvm.You may be mistaken my good man, we have no need of digging through the aquifer, we are in a rare geologic formation I call a "Dry Cliff"
Let me show you.
(http://img693.imageshack.us/img693/1771/diagramr.gif)
You see, while the Plain of Ooze has a thick almost impenetrable aquifer going throughout the entire biome, The land present in the Blueness of malodors is a sheer shale cliff with almost no sand whatsoever, and even the black sand that is present lacks an aquifer layer. Thus by staying in the border between the sea and the Plain we can dig to the perilous underground without needing to pierce any aquifers. You can use it as a source of water though, as I have.
We have plenty of coal and iron ore (but no flux) so you should be able to prepare for the fun that awaits you as we approach the close and inevitable point where we attract Aluonra's one thousand strong Titan population.
Post by: Krimson on May 15, 2010, 01:03:55 pm
Post by: Zathel on May 15, 2010, 01:11:08 pm
Post by: Krimson on May 15, 2010, 01:30:37 pm
Edit: Soldiers?
Edit2: ... You know pesants and farm hands took out the skelk in the settling of this place right? Without armor I might ad, The armor shall be reserved for the expedition leader (HE needs all the protection he can get, without him we have to savescum him back to life :P)
Post by: Robocorn on May 15, 2010, 01:36:56 pm
... I love this map, I truely do. Do you have the ORIGIONAL file so i can haz? >_> <_<
Aluonra was originally generated for one of my adventurers, I don't have the original claim, but I have the world before we settled and you should be able to find the area using the map I posted in the first post. If that's okay I could get it ready for you.
Whoa, that's awesome! No aquifer troubles. Flux can always be ordered from liaison. Oh, by the way, concerning resources... do we have cassiterite and any one of copper ores on the map? Since steel will be somewhat scarce, it might be a good idea to armor the military in bronze (it's better than iron and with how bugged military training is at the moment we need all the protection we can get for our soldiers).According to Magmawiki (http://df.magmawiki.com/index.php/DF2010:Sedimentary_layer) nope, only iron ores occur in the sedimentary rock that occupies most of the map. The igneous layers that have the precious metal ores and copper ores occur within the cavern levels, so you'd better get ready for fun if you want to get bronze. ;D
Edit2: ... You know pesants and farm hands took out the skelk in the settling of this place right? Without armor I might ad, The armor shall be reserved for the expedition leader (HE needs all the protection he can get, without him we have to savescum him back to life :P)
If by took out you mean beaten into the ground for months on end then yeah, we took out the skelk. (They really just migrated away after they killed everyone outside. The undead buzzards and me going berserk were however, taken out by five or six conscripted dwarves with no combat experience
Post by: Krimson on May 15, 2010, 01:38:12 pm
Post by: Zathel on May 15, 2010, 02:36:25 pm
... What military?
Edit: Soldiers?
Edit2: ... You know pesants and farm hands took out the skelk in the settling of this place right? Without armor I might ad, The armor shall be reserved for the expedition leader (HE needs all the protection he can get, without him we have to savescum him back to life :P)
I'm talking long term, long term man. Properly armed and armored military (even untrained) has a minuscule chance of kill... I mean destroying the skelks without being horribly mauled.
According to Magmawiki (http://df.magmawiki.com/index.php/DF2010:Sedimentary_layer) nope, only iron ores occur in the sedimentary rock that occupies most of the map. The igneous layers that have the precious metal ores and copper ores occur within the cavern levels, so you'd better get ready for fun if you want to get bronze. ;D
Eh, is that right? Iron will be ok then. I guess there are downsides to sedimentary layers.
Post by: Krimson on May 15, 2010, 02:42:01 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 15, 2010, 02:57:40 pm
>.> (Paints a portrait of skelks eating cheese from your dis-couraging skull)
I hadn't dorf'd him yet because there were no administrative dwarves, I should really put up a dwarf queue.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 15, 2010, 03:08:39 pm
Post by: Krimson on May 15, 2010, 03:14:54 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 15, 2010, 03:18:05 pm
Start ordering as much copper as you can get. We're going to have to import it, unless there's a marble layer under the Plain of Ooze.There isn't
I'm really surprised about this, most succession forts don't get this epic until at least the fourth turn but now we've just barely finished the first, I hope Andreus can keep up the win As the goblins say "Os-ddong ik zos-ddong"
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 15, 2010, 03:46:53 pm
Post by: Krimson on May 15, 2010, 04:10:59 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 15, 2010, 04:38:11 pm
Post by: Krimson on May 15, 2010, 05:35:53 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 15, 2010, 05:50:08 pm
Post by: Krimson on May 15, 2010, 05:54:47 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 15, 2010, 05:56:48 pm
Engraved on the forum is a masterful image of 'Urist the Blue' Zulbananan the dwarf and a cheese by 'Krimson' McDwarf. 'Urist the Blue' Zulbananan is raising the cheese. This relates to the receiving of cheese by 'Urist the Blue' Zulbananan from 'Krimson' McDwarf in the year 1051.It's 502 actually, too many titans get killed off in 1000 years so I set it to a more livable number. As sure I am that Immortal Urist could live five hundred years, I have less confidence in Krimson McTantrumkill
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 15, 2010, 06:37:50 pm
Sounds good! Now wheres my fanmade image of a dwarf clad all in red handing said cheese to the trampled mangled dying dwarf in blue?
I have quoted you in the fanart thread. It's only a matter of time.
Post by: Krimson on May 15, 2010, 06:50:36 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 15, 2010, 07:05:39 pm
Sounds good! Now wheres my fanmade image of a dwarf clad all in red handing said cheese to the trampled mangled dying dwarf in blue?
I have quoted you in the fanart thread. It's only a matter of time.
(http://img41.imageshack.us/img41/8536/uristnkrimson.png)
This captures all the majesty and wonder in the hypothetical situation
Post by: Krimson on May 15, 2010, 07:18:16 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 15, 2010, 07:19:09 pm
Post by: Andreus on May 15, 2010, 07:41:07 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 15, 2010, 07:42:06 pm
Starting my turn now.Take all the time you need as long as its epic.
Post by: Samthere on May 15, 2010, 08:00:54 pm
Post by: Andreus on May 15, 2010, 08:01:27 pm
*crash of thunder*
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/2.png)
It has begun.
Post by: Samthere on May 15, 2010, 08:37:43 pm
Post by: Matuin on May 15, 2010, 10:30:28 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 16, 2010, 11:11:58 pm
Post by: Matuin on May 16, 2010, 11:13:36 pm
You don't need to take all the time though.
Yeah... What's up? =)
Post by: Robocorn on May 17, 2010, 05:18:09 am
This forum is a must for people like him. ;D
In fact, Andreus should dorf a whole bunch of Davises for cavern exploration there can be Davis1 and Davis2 and all the Davis family and they can all go down to live with zombie crundles and voracious cavern crawlers having dwarven breast augmentation (with lava) from masterful dwarven plastic surgeons (using lava!) and using dwarven small business accounting software.
Post by: Zathel on May 17, 2010, 08:15:05 am
...and using dwarven small business accounting software.
Don't diss the bookkeepers man, they are the blood of the fortress!
Post by: Matuin on May 17, 2010, 12:03:48 pm
I hope someone dorfs our new friend DavisBoN in time for the cavern exploration. :D
This forum is a must for people like him. ;D
In fact, Andreus should dorf a whole bunch of Davises for cavern exploration there can be Davis1 and Davis2 and all the Davis family and they can all go down to live with zombie crundles and voracious cavern crawlers having dwarven breast augmentation (with lava) from masterful dwarven plastic surgeons (using lava!) and using dwarven small business accounting software.
You win 5 internets.
Post by: Andreus on May 17, 2010, 01:49:18 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 17, 2010, 01:57:58 pm
Post by: Samthere on May 17, 2010, 02:16:19 pm
Profession: "Distracted [Existing Profession Name]"
Post by: Zathel on May 17, 2010, 02:40:49 pm
Post by: Oglokoog on May 17, 2010, 05:12:30 pm
If there's anyone with Record Keeper or Organizer skill, dorf me and set me as bookkeeper/manager combo, profession name "Bookmaster".
Why would you do that? Bookkeeping is best as a full-time job. The combo to go with for manager is arsenal dwarf, as far as I know.
Post by: Zathel on May 17, 2010, 05:31:06 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 17, 2010, 05:44:05 pm
Post by: Samthere on May 17, 2010, 06:11:38 pm
Post by: Andreus on May 17, 2010, 06:25:56 pm
Post by: Oglokoog on May 17, 2010, 06:27:51 pm
Also, bookkeeping doesn't have to be "maintained" - once you're at maximum accuracy, it stays that way for the rest of the game.
True. But I noticed that when it's "in progress", the percentage sometimes seems to go down, so it's probably better to make it to the best accuracy as soon as possible.
Post by: Samthere on May 17, 2010, 06:30:45 pm
Yeah, I think how long it takes to reach a level depends on how much crap you've got, so if you add a load of crap it can end up taking longer.Also, bookkeeping doesn't have to be "maintained" - once you're at maximum accuracy, it stays that way for the rest of the game.
True. But I noticed that when it's "in progress", the percentage sometimes seems to go down, so it's probably better to make it to the best accuracy as soon as possible.
Post by: Oglokoog on May 17, 2010, 06:33:11 pm
Yeah, I think how long it takes to reach a level depends on how much crap you've got, so if you add a load of crap it can end up taking longer.Also, bookkeeping doesn't have to be "maintained" - once you're at maximum accuracy, it stays that way for the rest of the game.
True. But I noticed that when it's "in progress", the percentage sometimes seems to go down, so it's probably better to make it to the best accuracy as soon as possible.
Which means that a wise overseer lets the bookkeeper do his job before the really massive digging operations begin. You know - counting all the rocks in the entire fortress is hard, but it's even harder when there's several entire z-levels worth of stone to count.
Post by: Samthere on May 17, 2010, 06:39:44 pm
Well, of course, there are plenty of situations where you can't afford to wait, and the wisest move is to let the bookkeeper have a difficult time when there's some free time to be had. :DYeah, I think how long it takes to reach a level depends on how much crap you've got, so if you add a load of crap it can end up taking longer.
Which means that a wise overseer lets the bookkeeper do his job before the really massive digging operations begin. You know - counting all the rocks in the entire fortress is hard, but it's even harder when there's several entire z-levels worth of stone to count.
Such as when you're stuck outside, surrounded by skelks. :P
Post by: Andreus on May 17, 2010, 06:50:14 pm
Having successfully recorporialised, I must turn my attention to the construction of a sanctum suitable for my research. A deep vein of magnetite sits just beneath the lowest level of the fortress - the natural magnetism of the rocks will shield me from detection
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/3.png)
19th Slate, 502
Migrants have apparently arrived. I care little for these nobodies except in that they may assist with the speedy construction of my sanctum, which is progressing... acceptably. The space has been excavated according to my specifications and the stoneworkers have begun their work on the walls and the decor. The furniture is being sorted, and soon I shall order the statues built from the excavated magnetite.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/4.png)
20th Slate, 502
Incompetent and worthless blunderers! No sooner had I placed the orders for the smelting of the magnetite than I am informed by one of the stinking peons that occupies this godsforsaken hole that our supplies of alcohol are critically low.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/5.png)
So, being possessed of vast intelligence and foresight, I did what any sensible sorcerer would do in this situation.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/6.png)
I slacked off and let some other berk take care of it.
5th Felsite, 502
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/7.png)
Today I was accosted by a most peculiar dwarf by the name of Samzul. He seemed unable to concentrate on anything for more than a few seconds. This is exceptionally irritating as the fool's meant to be sorting out barrels to fix our alcohol issues and cages for my project. I swear that ever since my fourth corporealisation I've been surrounded by bad luck and imbeciles.
8th Felsite, 502
Curses! A skeletal buzzard has penetrated the fort's defences, and-
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/8.png)
Hold on, is that thing being taken down by a donkey?
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/9.png)
Goddamn.
Post by: Oglokoog on May 17, 2010, 06:52:37 pm
EDIT: (I think this is the first pun I ever made. I feel nauseated.)
Post by: Andreus on May 17, 2010, 07:37:51 pm
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/10.png)
Elves have arrived. Finally, some worthwhile company.
25th Felsite, 502
Trading with the elves has provided us with sufficient wood, alcohol and food to keep us going, at least until the summer. This is good, because I have no desire to micromanage these idiots while I recuperate from injuries recently sustained in my research.
(By the way, I've noticed that we have no broker noble, nor is it possible to assign one. What do I do about that?)
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 17, 2010, 07:38:57 pm
Post by: Andreus on May 17, 2010, 08:11:18 pm
Yet another wagon in the parade of constant interruptions! A herd of zombie muskox have been sighted near the fortress. I have dispatched the militia squad, the Pointy Torches, consisting of miner Krimson and carpenter Samzul and a to take care of them - hopefully they will not fail me as pitifully as the previous commander, who lies dying on the floor of Battlefailed's entryway.
1st Malachite, 502
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/11.png)
A presence stirs the stale air of this fortress - these fools are oblivious to it, yet I can feel it - from whence did it come, and what does it want? It has ensconced itself in the weak mind of one of the dwarves. I shall have to monitor this situation carefully.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/12.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/13.png)
2nd Malachite, 502
Well, fuck.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/14.png)
I feel it likely that Krimson is equally doomed. I have ordered all dwarves to take refuge inside the fortress and the doors to be sealed. We shall consider our next move... carefully.
6th Malachite, 502
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/15.png)
Some good news for a change. The presence that claimed one of the dwarves seemed to be a relatively benign spirit of creativity. Such beings occasionally take hold of the minds of suitably weak-willed individuals and inspire them to create grand works of art - such is their nature. While not the most impressive creation the world has ever seen, this window is certainly pretty.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/16.png)
I shall have it placed in my study without delay.
7th Malachite, 502
Well fuck me sideways.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/18.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/19.png)
Not only is Krimson not dead, not only did he slay an entire herd of zombie muskox, but he came banging on the gates of the fortress demanding that we let him in because he's bringing a wave of migrants in tow. Perhaps I was wrong. Perhaps the dwarves of this fortress are not entirely worthless.
8th Malachite, 502
Through my attunement to the area, I sense that one of the fortress animals is feeling disquieted. I shall commune with-
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/20.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/21.png)
$%&£$£$@!!!
Post by: Matuin on May 18, 2010, 12:34:41 am
Post by: Zathel on May 18, 2010, 03:13:26 am
Destroys a herd of skeletal muskox, brings migrants to the fort, then dies in a bathtub?
I think the assorted undead hordes have something to do with it. Unfortunate dodge perhaps?
Post by: Robocorn on May 18, 2010, 02:53:59 pm
Nice update, the fact that elves showed up is a good sign, it means that there may be an open market for +«*Elf Bone Scepter*»+s.
Post by: Andreus on May 18, 2010, 03:46:57 pm
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/19.png)
Why do people continue turning up at this godforsaken hole? This must be how the great doom-fortresses of legend like Boatmurdered and Sparkgear got started - dwarves coming to some godsforsaken pit out of sheer bloody-minded stupidity. I hope my research provides me with what I seek, or, in the absence of an immediate result, a body less... repulsive. I despise these creatures.
11th Sandstone, 502
This place has gone from bad to worse since the new migrants arrived. These filthy, drunken inbreds spend all of their time throwing celebrations and wasting the alcohol that was set aside on a strictly rationed basis to deal with the curious biological dependency which this depraved species possesses for it. The wounds I took recently have healed - perhaps I will not need to recorporealise again as soon as I had anticipated.
21st Timber, 502
Our immediate problems seem to be at an end. A dwarven caravan arrived and its guardians fought off the herd of undead horses that had been blighting our settlement, and they had many goods to trade with us. It would be excellent if we had an official broker, but needs must. I think things are finally looking-
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/22.png)
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!
Post by: Andreus on May 18, 2010, 04:16:40 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 18, 2010, 04:38:35 pm
Post by: Andreus on May 18, 2010, 05:01:58 pm
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/23.png)
Alright. That does it.
I'm going to seal the fortress and pray for a quick death.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/24.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/25.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/26.png)
(Currently, all the dwarves that got stuck outside the fortress when the doors were sealed is dead, but there's one donkey still alive and a herd of skelks and zelks are helping the Titan chase it around. The Titan seems to be doing more damage to the skelks than than he is to the donkey. I kind of feel like the Benny Hill theme should be playing. What is it with this fortress and insanely badass donkeys?)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/27.png)
(At one point, my one remaining fighting-fit militiadwarf picked up the berserking child BY HIS TOE and threw him against a wall. Badfuckingass)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/28.png)
This picture is the true, undiluted essence of Dwarf Fortress. If you opened a dictionary and looked for Dwarf Fortress, you would not find any definition, just this image. Please, picture, if you will, this scene in your head - the militia commander Athel Sabrepunch, gem cutter by trade, wrestler and fighter by neccessity, stands locked in a desperate struggle with the child Cerol "Shamebirth" Handledbell, the small boy's eyes devoid of reason or compassion, burning with the unholy flame of a berserk fury. Spit and froth spew from his mouth as he screams incoherent fragments of obscenities into the face of his adversary in a dark, unwholesome language understood by none, not even himself. Though his opponent is twice his size, his rage gives him unnatural strength making him more than a match for the adult dwarf that stands between him and the desperately wounded invalids lying on the hospital beds not more than an armspan away. Athel knows that he must strike down this raging youngster, lest he kill not only him but the helpless convalescents as well. Seizing the moment, he bends into a crouch and seizes the child by his foot, and mustering all of his strength, tosses him shrieking against the wall. Before his opponent can react, he bullrushes him, setting his knee against the child's chest and, seizing him by the neck with both hands, squeezes with all his might. Cerol makes raspy choking sounds as the life slowly drains from his bruised and bloodstained body, his arms flailing helplessly, clawing at the dwarf above him. Tears stream from his eyes as the end approaches, and he stares helplessly up into the cold, emotionless eyes of Athel Sabrepunch, his soon-to-be-murderer and lets out a shriek of despair and terror that reaches no further than his bruised, spasming throat. "Shh, shhh, shhh" Athel coos softly, pressing down with his knee one more time. There is a dull gurgling sound, the child's eyes roll up into his head, and then there is silence, broken only by the groans of the wounded and the unearthly shrieks of the primeval monster laying waste to the land above.
And then, less than 12 frames later...
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/29.png)
On reflection, I can't honestly say I'm surprised, really...
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 18, 2010, 05:13:19 pm
Post by: Andreus on May 18, 2010, 06:11:25 pm
This entire expedition has been a disaster, right from its beginning. I have sealed myself in the sanctum and made preparations for my consciousness to leave this body, as I imagine will be neccessary in the very immediate future. I have instructed the remaining dwarves who have not succumbed to madness or despair that one of them must now lead the fortress. That was merely a formality - I doubt that anyone here has the intelligence to last through the next few months, let alone save this fortress.
Well, that was a wild ride, and it took a long time, but I had a blast. It was fun to watch everything go tits-up. Currently, there are 18 living dwarves, two of which, a woodworker and a child, are running around babbling. Most of the rest are either unhappy or miserable. I converted Urist the Blue's tomb into a makeshift catacomb for the rest of the dead dwarves. A tantruming dwarf destroyed the cage trap and the inner seal, so the only thing separating the fortress from the outside world is the outer seal. On the bright side, food and drink stocks seem to be fine, the skeletal elks departed after the donkey finally died and for some reason the forest titan is in the ocean, covered in red and yellow wounds, and I'm not sure if it can get out again. There's a couple of undead buzzards floating around but they shouldn't pose a problem for any remotely competent wrestler (of which we have exactly one, who got most of his wrestling experience from strangling Cerol). The entire map is covered in blood, corpses, and ash from the various fights that occured between dwarves, skelks and the forest titan.
Here's the save (http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/BattleFailed-EndOfTurn2.zip). Have fun! :D
Post by: Robocorn on May 18, 2010, 06:21:59 pm
way to go Andreus, surely this will continue to add to the unadulterated epicnes that is Battlefailed. Just a question, what was the population when the titan showed up, I can't remember what the parameters for titan arrival was in worldgen :-X
I believe Urist needs no help in starting his turn.
Post by: Samthere on May 18, 2010, 06:30:55 pm
But still, why'd you seal Tubby Luma out? :D
Post by: Andreus on May 18, 2010, 06:32:13 pm
Oh, by the way, Ecen Omlistren Tuma Lubbe translates as "Ecen Howlpass the Raven of Skins", which is pretty hardcore in my opinion.
Post by: Robocorn on May 18, 2010, 06:47:01 pm
The population peaked at about 28, I think, although there may have been a couple of deaths in between that and the arrival of Lubby.
Oh, by the way, Ecen Omlistren Tuma Lubbe translates as "Ecen Howlpass the Raven of Skins", which is pretty hardcore in my opinion.
Strange, I thought that it took more money and dwarves to get unspeakable monstrosities. I thought I'd set it to something even like 30.
Just to obfuscate further It's first name means Oak.
Am I the only one who's surprised that Thrips is an available monster shape?
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 18, 2010, 07:28:51 pm
EDIT:
Quote
I converted Urist the Blue's tomb into a makeshift catacomb for the rest of the dead dwarves.
I'll have to rebury me. Thanks.
Post by: Andreus on May 18, 2010, 07:48:02 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 18, 2010, 07:57:20 pm
Post by: Andreus on May 19, 2010, 08:31:32 am
Post by: heyguys on May 19, 2010, 12:45:13 pm
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/23.png)
Has anyone else noticed that our resident Titan is a blue Tree Ent with scales for bark, walks like a breakdancer, and shoots fire out of his mouth? I am imagining that he is wearing giant sunglasses and a giant jogger's suit.
edit: He is doing the robot while his head spins 360 degrees and showers the landscape with fireballs, which land at perfect timing onto skeletal elks and others; exploding like artillery shells.
edit: Somebody open up paint and paint this.
Post by: Ilmoran on May 19, 2010, 12:50:38 pm
I wanted to talk about this:
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/23.png)
Has anyone else noticed that our resident Titan is a blue Tree Ent with scales for bark, walks like a breakdancer, and shoots fire out of his mouth? I am imagining that he is wearing giant sunglasses and a giant jogger's suit.
edit: He is doing the robot while his head spins 360 degrees and showers the landscape with fireballs, which land at perfect timing onto skeletal elks and others; exploding like artillery shells.
Tree Ent? A thrips (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thrips) is a bug.
Post by: heyguys on May 19, 2010, 12:54:27 pm
I wanted to talk about this:
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/23.png)
Has anyone else noticed that our resident Titan is a blue Tree Ent with scales for bark, walks like a breakdancer, and shoots fire out of his mouth? I am imagining that he is wearing giant sunglasses and a giant jogger's suit.
edit: He is doing the robot while his head spins 360 degrees and showers the landscape with fireballs, which land at perfect timing onto skeletal elks and others; exploding like artillery shells.
Tree Ent? A thrips (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thrips) is a bug.
ugh. that makes the above that much harder to draw.
Post by: Zathel on May 19, 2010, 01:51:43 pm
I wanted to talk about this:
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/502/23.png)
Has anyone else noticed that our resident Titan is a blue Tree Ent with scales for bark, walks like a breakdancer, and shoots fire out of his mouth? I am imagining that he is wearing giant sunglasses and a giant jogger's suit.
edit: He is doing the robot while his head spins 360 degrees and showers the landscape with fireballs, which land at perfect timing onto skeletal elks and others; exploding like artillery shells.
Tree Ent? A thrips (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thrips) is a bug.
Even better. That means it can be killed.
Send out the militia, Battlefailed bravest sons!... or so I would like to say. I guess it'll have to wait. But we'll get the bastard!
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 19, 2010, 01:58:45 pm
Diary of "Urist the Blue the Immortal the Second," Bone Carver
A crippled fish dissector who calls himself Andreus II told me that I was in charge of the fortress until further notice. I immediately took stock of our situation. We have a raving maniac standing next to what looks like an empty swimming pool, a rough chrysoprase in our water source, loads of useless shit in our entrance, no trade depot in sight, a perfectly smooth chamber at the lowest level of the fort, eighteen dwarves total, seven of whom are angry bearded bastards, four dwarves bedridden with injuries, two nutcases (counting the one already mentioned), so many dead it's funny, and to top it all off, there's a giant firebreathing bug going for a dip in the ocean. I can see why that fishguy wanted out. Did I mention there's a skeletal horse in a cage near the blood-soaked butcher's workshop?
Edit: Six angry gits, three loonies, and we're short an armorer.
Edit: We're down to 10 dwarves, three resting, one insane. Unfortunately, the psycho is our miner. We have no clue where his pick went, and for some reason nobody wants to grab one of the two in our stockpiles.
(http://south-florida-divers.com/spiegelsunk1.jpg)
ABANDON SHIP?
Post by: Andreus on May 19, 2010, 02:39:22 pm
Did I mention there's a skeletal horse in a cage near the blood-soaked butcher's workshop?
Oh man, that's hilarious. I totally forgot.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 19, 2010, 02:44:31 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 19, 2010, 03:17:47 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 19, 2010, 03:25:37 pm
EDIT: YES! PRAISE BE TO LASSTA! THE HUMAN PIKEMAN KILLED THE BEAST OF FORGOTTENNESS! ALL IS SAFE ONCE MORE!
Post by: Zathel on May 19, 2010, 03:48:46 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 19, 2010, 04:42:21 pm
Post by: heyguys on May 19, 2010, 04:43:36 pm
Post by: mathlc on May 19, 2010, 06:17:31 pm
if yes, plz pm me :D
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 20, 2010, 12:00:49 pm
please post a picture of what happened to the titan.
Not much to see. There's just an I on the beach.
Post by: Zathel on May 20, 2010, 12:58:31 pm
please post a picture of what happened to the titan.
Not much to see. There's just an I on the beach.
I think he meant the combat report of his killing.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 20, 2010, 01:08:24 pm
EDIT: By that I mean the titan bled to death and the last message in the combat log when I saw it was:
The bronze pike is lodged firmly in the wound!
NOTHING happened this year. Except the badass humans.
Save. (http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=2384)
Post by: Matuin on May 20, 2010, 01:09:52 pm
Post by: Zathel on May 20, 2010, 01:10:39 pm
I should have taken a screenie when the messages still existed ::)
NOTHING happened this year. Except the badass humans.
Save. (http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=2384)
Hey, at least you could peacefully occupy yourself with necessities.
Post by: Matuin on May 20, 2010, 02:01:11 pm
This fortress has gone to hell in a hand basket!
The outside is strewn with ashes and corpses of every race you can imagine. Blood is apparently the favored paint of Battlefailed.
We have 9 dwarves remaining. They are sealed in the fortress, hiding from the remaining skeletal hordes outside. The only upside is the ton of food/drink we have.
This'll be a fun turn.
EDIT: I had to shorten some of the names of the custom dwarves. I couldn't see what they were doing = /
Post by: Matuin on May 20, 2010, 02:44:44 pm
I praise Otik every day that I survive in this hellish place. It is by his grace I am alive to write these words down.
(http://i288.photobucket.com/albums/ll198/Tristan-kasinger/Dwarf%20Fort/Otik.jpg)
Battlefailed has lived up to its name: we have failed time and time again to fend off the skeletal beasts that ravage this land. The only reason we haven't been overrun is the human caravan that rolled through recently, bringing redeath to all that stood on the surface world. The previous ruler of the fortress sealed us off from the outside world (a good move), simultaneously sealing the fate of everyone on the surface. Now only we nine survive:
(http://i288.photobucket.com/albums/ll198/Tristan-kasinger/Dwarf%20Fort/Battlefailed_1.jpg)
I've separated the survivors into squads (They call them guilds for some reason). Each guild has its own tasks that, hopefully, will return our fortress to some of its glory.
My first order of business is to bury our dead. Those above ground will have to rot, as I dare not take on the skeletal horses myself.
20th Granite, 504
I'm getting annoyed with two dwarves, Andreus II and Urist the Blue. Neither of them want to pick up our mining picks and get to work, instead they just stand around all day. It is frustrating to no end.
(I'm not sure how long this fortress can go on. No nobles, no mining, no wood, only 9 dwarves. We can go on indefinately with our stocks, but expansion and militarization are nigh impossible.)
Post by: rickvoid on May 20, 2010, 02:59:07 pm
Post by: Zathel on May 20, 2010, 03:03:11 pm
If those two can't mine, draft others for the task.
Post by: Matuin on May 20, 2010, 03:05:05 pm
20th of Granite, 504
We've almost reached the fortress of Battlefailed. The other immigrants are excited, as our journey has been long and hard. Many perished, only we 20 remain. Finally some rest for a change...
28th of Granite, 504
As we crested the dunes that shielded Battlefailed from view, my heart sank.
The entire landscape is littered with corpses. There isn't a living thing in sight. At first we thought the fortress had been overrun. I prepared for the worst. Just as we turned to leave, however, the ground opened up and two dwarves rushed out to greet us. Ha! The fortress had been hidden this whole time, what dwarven genius!
29th of Granite, 504
This fortress is a mess.
I am the only person willing to mine in this entire place, so I have begun excavating areas for expanding the fortress' living areas. Currently everything is crammed into 3-4 rooms, which makes this place uncomfortable to live in. This brings me to my next point...
As we cannot go outside and no one wants to work, I have set the entire fortress to begin smoothing and cleaning our current living areas. It is undwarvenly to live in such filth!
(Picks are unforbidden, my Therapist doesn't work with this version so I have designated the labors in game. No idea why they wont, none of the new migrants will pick them up either.)
30th of Granite, 504
It seems we have a problem with skeletal beasts around these parts, so I have drafted 9 of my fellow immigrants into the military. This will give them something worthwhile to do while the others clean.
20th of Slate, 504
Kigok be praised! Following my example, Urist and Andreus, the lazy dwarves who refused to mine, have begun excavation with me! This is great news indeed.
We've begun to dig out a new food stockpile near the dining area, as well as expand that dining area. Two tables is not enough for 29 dwarves to eat at, I don't care how friendly we are.
I have designated a new crypt. It seems one of the previous rulers had dug out some laboratory below the fortress. As we don't need it, I have moved many of the corpses to it. One of the rooms is being filled with coffins to keep the rotting dead from smelling up the place.
28th of Felsite, 504
The elven caravan has arrived. We need cloth badly, as we have several wounded in our hospital, so I have constructed a trade depot and our militia prepares to charge the Zelks outside our door. Kigok save us.
29th of Felsite, 504
We are victorious! The Pointy Torches, though their commander has been bed ridden for as long as I have been in Battlefailed, charged through our gates and into the mass of Zelks. A hideous battle ensued, but only one wrestler was injured. The elves, who stood by and watched (presumably peeing on their skirts) are approaching the fortress now.
30th of Felsite, 504
Due to a mishap in the trade depot, the elven merchant refused to trade with us. So, our militia seized everything they had. I won't put up with any of this "Save the forest!" bullshit.
(Thus ended spring. An incredibly eventful season for me. I'm training up the militia and I will attempt to destroy the remainder of the undead during summer.)
Post by: Robocorn on May 20, 2010, 04:07:54 pm
I don't understand what happened to the old depot and the drawbridges, they were all operational when my turn ended and some of Andreus's first complaints were the lack of a depot. What keeps happening to these things?
Post by: Zathel on May 20, 2010, 04:36:56 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 20, 2010, 04:50:13 pm
Wasn't depot outside? Maybe the forest titan destroyed it.
There was a wall around it and a bridge that served to block all access to it, also, Andreus made another depot and there isn't one now, so there have now been three depots all built in places that were easily exposed to destruction from the undead.
Post by: Matuin on May 20, 2010, 05:29:46 pm
Wasn't depot outside? Maybe the forest titan destroyed it.
There was a wall around it and a bridge that served to block all access to it, also, Andreus made another depot and there isn't one now, so there have now been three depots all built in places that were easily exposed to destruction from the undead.
I'll built mine inside =)
As for the drawbridges, they are functional. I had the fortress sealed off for a long time but I just reopened them to let migrants and merchants in, and I will be attempting to reclaim the surface world so that the next ruler can build a more impressive defensive area.
Post by: Andreus on May 20, 2010, 08:02:16 pm
Post by: Lancensis on May 21, 2010, 08:16:22 am
Post by: Matuin on May 21, 2010, 12:16:26 pm
I'm probably not going to get to end summer until Saturday. Just found out I'm working a double tonight >.>
Post by: Lancensis on May 21, 2010, 12:34:48 pm
I'll check.
It's just a vague idea. I'm trying to figure out what a miner has against his pick at the moment, and I'm wondering if there's just too much blood on it.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 21, 2010, 12:42:29 pm
Post by: rickvoid on May 21, 2010, 12:56:27 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 21, 2010, 01:00:12 pm
Post by: Andreus on May 21, 2010, 03:03:25 pm
I have designated a new crypt. It seems one of the previous rulers had dug out some laboratory below the fortress. As we don't need it
MY SANCTUM!
You've disturbed the carefully-constructed balance of arcane energies I had laboured so long and hard to produce! There will be blood, little filthy stunty man! There'll be BLOOD! >:(
Post by: Robocorn on May 21, 2010, 05:33:23 pm
Post by: Lancensis on May 21, 2010, 05:43:10 pm
someone will just wind up filling it with corpses.
You mean the nice things, or just Battlefailed itself?
Post by: Robocorn on May 21, 2010, 05:46:39 pm
Yessomeone will just wind up filling it with corpses.
You mean the nice things, or just Battlefailed itself?
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 21, 2010, 09:45:23 pm
I have designated a new crypt. It seems one of the previous rulers had dug out some laboratory below the fortress. As we don't need it
MY SANCTUM!
You've disturbed the carefully-constructed balance of arcane energies I had laboured so long and hard to produce! There will be blood, little filthy stunty man! There'll be BLOOD! >:(
Actually I disturbed it. Were the dwarves that dehydrated down there assigned to a burrow? Cause I never checked.
Post by: Samthere on May 21, 2010, 10:18:51 pm
Post by: Matuin on May 22, 2010, 12:01:38 am
If you want I could flood it with magma on my turn :P
I love how the solution to almost any problem in DF is to fill it with Corpses, then fill it with magma.
EDIT: Sorry for the lack of updates. I havn't had a free moment the past few days. My next day off is Monday. Hopefully I'll be able to get to it by then, if not I may pass the save on...
Post by: Matuin on May 23, 2010, 12:03:46 am
Post by: heyguys on May 23, 2010, 01:36:50 am
Post by: Andreus on May 23, 2010, 08:53:11 am
Post by: Samthere on May 23, 2010, 10:59:49 am
Also, Robo, could you change the blue colour of people who've taken their turns so far? I find it hard to read.
Code: [Select]
[color=skyblue]This, perhaps?[/color]
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 23, 2010, 12:07:36 pm
I'd like to 'partially' take turn 18, if I can, but if people are eager I'm fine with giving it up.
Also, Robo, could you change the blue colour of people who've taken their turns so far? I find it hard to read.Code: [Select][color=skyblue]This, perhaps?[/color]
Code: [Select]
[color=cyan]would be better.
Post by: Robocorn on May 23, 2010, 09:05:52 pm
Post by: Matuin on May 24, 2010, 04:44:53 am
http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=2403 (http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=2403)
Post by: Robocorn on May 24, 2010, 11:16:05 pm
(Sent the message to Samthere)
Post by: Samthere on May 27, 2010, 06:59:49 am
Downloading the save and checking it out, now!
Post by: Samthere on May 27, 2010, 07:26:57 am
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on May 27, 2010, 10:27:28 am
Post by: Samthere on May 27, 2010, 11:04:40 am
Post by: Zathel on May 27, 2010, 01:34:30 pm
Post by: Robocorn on May 27, 2010, 02:06:04 pm
Post by: Samthere on May 27, 2010, 05:15:13 pm
Guess I'll go without, though C:
Will pick it up and try to work it out tomorrow <3
Post by: Samthere on May 28, 2010, 01:50:21 pm
I arrive in Summer - an unusual time for a guardian to be called, but it seems the overseer just couldn't handle the stress.
Pools of blood and corpses litter the landscape. With time stopped for those below me, I take a while to get my bearings, and to learn the fortress. It's a sprawling mess, dug carelessly out of necessity. The residents aren't even sure what to consider an actual part of the fortress!
Some elves gather worriedly about the perimeter of my influence. They'll likely make a meal for a nearby group of zombie horses.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf002.png) (http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf003.png)
The dwarves have been working on a trade depot, and finished it yesterday. The elves rushed in, avoiding the zombie horses.
Matuin peddles the clothes of our dead for various goods.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf005.png)
He says he knows all the prices now, but refuses to value the fortress' goods. No matter, I'll just have to guide trade more carefully.
Having looked into the records and seeing the abilities of 'skelks', I question the fortress' defenses. I inspire the creation of an extra wall and a bridge. The seas are teaming with anchovy, so a the construction of a fishing platform begins. The masons get distracted by groundhog skeletons.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf007.png)
The militia run out and make short work of the creatures with their bare hands. The dwarves are glad it was nothing more deadly.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf008.png)
Zombie and skeletal buzzards soar into the fortress from above, looking for food and interrupting our masons. A few of them steal berries from the corpse of a trader's pack animal - they're the lucky ones.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Again, the militia show them no respect and separate them forcibly.
Humans come to trade. We have plenty of alcohol and food, so weaponry is the only thing of interest to us right now. They bring no useful weaponry.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf010.png)
A few bars of various metals are traded for the silken finery of a dead dwarf.
The dwarves decide to start building the fishing platform from the bridge, where they cannot secure it. A floor crumbles away beneath its creator's feet, and he falls to the ocean floor.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf013.png)
How careless.
It seems I'll have to be more careful to cover for these dwarves' stupidity. A second has fallen into the water. He was of no great importance, but his death is a blessing. A school of rays gather to feed on his corpse, directly beneath the fishing platform.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf016.png)
When it's complete, perhaps we should throw sacrifices into the water occasionally to draw out the fish.
Autumn comes. The fishing platform is nearly finished.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf017.png)
In the coming months I will choose an avatar, and see him well cared for.
Post by: Robocorn on May 28, 2010, 02:57:59 pm
I'm unsure whether or not we're giving you the rest of his year or the rest of his year and yours, I guess it depends on how many months he had left.
The blueness of malodors seems more savage than evil so there will likely be some big time savage ocean life if we mess around there enough. I'm looking forward to a zombie great white shark.
Post by: Samthere on May 28, 2010, 03:04:27 pm
Should I leave any weaknesses in the fishing platform? I'm building it so that a swimming creature (not just one capable of breathing in water, 'cos it's too deep) with buildingdestroyer could theoretically get onto the bridge and break down the doors.
Post by: Robocorn on May 28, 2010, 10:45:22 pm
Though keep in mind that most swimmers have the [immobile_land] tag that makes them helpless on land and ripe for being beaten and turned into masterwork bone armor.
Post by: SethCreiyd on May 28, 2010, 11:34:10 pm
Post by: Zathel on May 29, 2010, 04:32:40 am
I condemn their evil, but merfolk hunters devised some pretty nice methods of harvesting the ocean's life. (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=25967.0)
Huh? What? Condemn? Evil? Guys, I think we have an elf in disguise on our hand here!
Post by: SethCreiyd on May 29, 2010, 11:06:20 am
*runs*
Post by: Robocorn on May 29, 2010, 11:34:30 am
Post by: Samthere on May 29, 2010, 12:31:58 pm
There are not enough beds. Everyone sleeps in the hospital, or on the floor. I order a dormitory dug out, and a carpentry workshop built.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf019.png)
More, more, more fish! They swarm towards the corpses.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf020.png)
Salmon, herrings, anchovies, rays, blue fish! The platform will snag them all!
Skelks and zelks come to piss me off, rushing over the bridge before I realise they're here. A dwarf runs away onto the fishing bridge, and I lock the door telekinetically. (From my gameside text notes: "OH BALLS HERE COME THE SKELK")
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf021.png)
I laugh at the fool as he bangs on the door, not realising that if he were allowed out he would make a tasty meal for an undead elk.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf022.png)
The militia gank them and suffer minor injuries. The militia commander is hospitalised with several wounds, and a gem setter who couldn't run fast enough joins him. I wear the antlers to the hospital and do a kooky dance to scare the patients. For some reason, they don't find it funny.
Freaks.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf023.png)
We have no clothier's workshop, so I tell an engraver at dinner to build one. He agrees immediately, and wanders off.
I catch him a while later, and he tells me he was about to do it after he dumped some stones. I tell him to stop dumping stones.
He decides to reorganise the fortress' stockpiles. I tell him to stop reorganising the fortress' stockpiles.
He thinks there's plenty of time to build the workshop later, so he goes to carve some sculptures. I kick him in the face.
He builds the workshop.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf024.png)
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf025.png)
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf026.png)
I shall be sure to remember this if I ever need to hide my beautiful face.
A caravan arrives and is immediately beset by undead horses. The human fortress liaison takes one look at the landscape, squeals like an elf and runs away.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf027.png)
The caravan guards distract the horses while the traders rush to the depot.
Over the last month I've had the miners digging straight down, deep into the bedrock. I thirst for delicious magma. They finally spotted something promising.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf028.png)
The fishing platform is complete and secure.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf029.png)
The only thing that ignores its defenses are waves, which merrily flow straight through the walls.
My living quarters are nearly complete! When they are finished, they'll be fit for such a handsome and chiselled spirit as myself.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf030.png)
In my infinite generosity, I order a statue chamber carven nearby, so that I may hold parties without venturing far. The magnificent window will be installed there, instead of my room, that all may enjoy it.
Winter cometh.
Post by: Robocorn on May 29, 2010, 03:47:52 pm
Post by: Samthere on May 29, 2010, 07:22:00 pm
Post by: heyguys on May 30, 2010, 01:00:04 am
Post by: Oglokoog on May 30, 2010, 08:04:22 am
Correct, we're Dwarves raised by goblins. We're currently not living up to our evil. We need to release flaming undead horses upon our enemies or something to that effect.
Oh, so sigged. :D
Post by: Samthere on May 30, 2010, 09:45:34 am
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf032.png)
Great. A giant, blind bug named Guzzlebones. Apparently it doesn't move by accident.
The dwarves gather on the bridge to meet it. Naturally, they ignore all of the new weapons and armour we just bought.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf033.png)
It 'deliberately' gets distracted and starts to chase a cat. The dwarves hold fast.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf034.png)
A group of undead muskox join the chase!
VIDEO SPECIAL
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MBFYTc0d0jY
A stream or rhesus macaques come along to steal whatever they can from us. No problem, right? The dwarves are guarding the only entrance.
WRONG.
Some of the dwarves chase macaques into the middle of the muskox.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf035.png)
One brave fellow faces the titan head-on, and beats it silly.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf036.png)
The other guy still has four or five undead muskox kicking the crap out of him.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf037.png)
While the rest of the militia is still distracted by the monkeys:
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf038.png)
Guzzlebones takes the opportunity to ignore all of the nearby soldiers (damn blind critter), run into the fortress and BREAK MY BEDROOM. THE BASTARD. (Notes from my gameside text file: "RHESUS MACAQUES RUIN EVERYTHING" / "FFFFFFFFF TITAN DESTROYING MY ROOM")
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf039.png)
I will make it pay.
Guzzlebones goes on a rampage and merrily charges around the place, breaking down workshops and statues and doors.
It goes to the tomb and a dog tries to kill it. The dog doesn't do too well.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf040.png)
The militia finally finish up top and make short work of it.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf041.png)
Then they go to help out with the muskox, who have spent the whole time stomping a couple of dwarves into the ground.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf042.png)
Led Conjuredmined is sporting the Battlefailed national dress:
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf046.png)
I severely underestimate the muskox and send in a few more new recruits.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf047.png)
Injuries for everyone! Yay! Most of the militia is going to die. A few soldiers manage to peel away/regain consciousness and get back into the fortress.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf048.png)
Well... screw it. I order the bridge raised and go off to get drunk.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf049.png)
By the end of Winter, the statue room was done! Complete with sexy window and undead-horse-in-a-box.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/bf050.png)
Post by: Robocorn on May 30, 2010, 10:03:25 am
2. I saw a champion in the video, what was it?
3. What was our population before the titan showed up, are we getting any closer to achieving that much coveted town status we've been craving so we can appoint some useful nobles?
Post by: Samthere on May 30, 2010, 10:06:19 am
We lost/will lose maybe 6-10 in total to the muskox. Population is 24 but will probably be 22 or 20 when they finally die. :D
I'll have more exact numbers for you next time I play.
But yeah, I think no mayor any time soon. The best that could be done is to add [ELECTED] to the expedition leader.
Post by: Robocorn on May 30, 2010, 10:10:35 am
Post by: Oglokoog on May 30, 2010, 10:49:40 am
Post by: Samthere on May 30, 2010, 10:54:41 am
That's why Youtube. :P
Post by: Oglokoog on May 30, 2010, 11:03:31 am
When I saw it starting, in my mind it had to be accompanied by that music. There was no other way.
That's why Youtube. :P
Oh, music. Sorry then, I had sound turned off. But that could actually be a good addition to the DFMA movie feature - sounds. Who runs it?
Post by: melkorp on May 30, 2010, 11:45:40 pm
Post by: Samthere on May 31, 2010, 12:16:47 pm
I leave Battlefailed to its fate, in the hands of some other spirit, or maybe one of its residents.
Save file. (http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=2435)
Map on DFMA. (http://mkv25.net/dfma/map-8877-battlefailed)
> END TURN
Well, I have exams all this week, and decided to reset the timing back to Spring to make it easier for people who just want to do a yearly autosave. It's been fun, Battlefailed!
The cavern levels aren't visible on the map. They're currently sealed up, though.
Finally, the checkerboard dug out near the mechanic's workshop is intended to be a miasma-control refuse area. Feel free to use it or ignore it!
OGLOKOOG! MAKE US PROUD!
Fail a battle for me.
Post by: Oglokoog on May 31, 2010, 01:35:00 pm
EDIT: Ok so... I'm running at a steady 25 fps and I really am not in the mood for that right now. The first update (which should hopefully encompass at least spring) will be up tomorrow at 22:00 GMT+1.
Post by: Andreus on June 01, 2010, 02:51:24 pm
Post by: Oglokoog on June 01, 2010, 03:54:43 pm
1st Granite, 505
I have arrived to this god-forsaken hellhole they call a fortress. I have to admit, I actually expected something really horrible, but the worst thing I noticed at first glance were the two soldiers left of what seemed to have been a pretty sizable force fighting (if it could really be called such) a herd of zombie and skeletal muskoxen just outside the main gate.
A metalsmith organized a party and I am going to have to assume he held it in my honor, because in any other case, he's being ungrateful - his braver brethren are fighting and dying above and he's having fun as if it's no big deal...
6th Granite, 505
I have noticed that there are several open entrances to the underground caverns in the central staircase. This is a security oversight, albeit a minor one - even though my inspection revealed no flying creatures in the caverns, some could appear at any given time and even a mere giant cave swallow can cause a catastrophe if it is let to roam a fortress' halls unchecked.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
12th Granite, 505
Most of the unwounded dwarves are partying. Everyone is having a great time, except for the cripples in their beds and the two brave soldiers above...
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
20th Granite, 505
I have noticed that the farm plots on one of the upper levels don't seem like they are being used. I asked one of the farmers why that is and he couldn't tell me. All he said is that "we just can't farm there, sir". It's weird, but I am not going to be stopped by something so minor - I have immediately ordered the miners to dig out a new area that we can farm in. A murky pool will serve well as a water source.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
24th Granite, 505
The miners have dug out the new farms and they now sit around doing nothing, just as the rest of the fortress. I have noticed that while the staircase does go very deep indeed, the shaft still doesn't reach the magma that's bound to be down there somewhere. I have thus ordered the miners to dig deeper.
27th Granite, 505
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
2nd Slate, 505
The last soldier up there is still alive. The muskoxen seem to be torturing her to death, slowly, but surely.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
4th Slate, 505
The soldier died of a multitude of various wounds. The muskoxen, victorious but having been dealt a severe beating themselves, crawled away, satisfied. Soulless beasts...
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
7th Slate, 505
I have ordered the upper farm to be flooded. No accidents occured, everything went quite fine. Two shrubs grew almost immediately after the water touched the sandy floor.
19th Slate, 505
The miners are, once again, in lack of a job, so I have begun a new mining operation in the deeps, a few levels above the top cavern level.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
20th Slate, 505
Raw microcline! Praise the miners!
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
21st Slate, 505
A pair of evil, evil groundhogs, one zombified and the other nothing but bone, have appeared. How can anything so small be so terrifying?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
28th Slate, 505
Migrants! Migrants have arrived! Among others, there was a high master furnace operator (truly, a gift from the gods in any situation) and, well... one dwarf of lesser talents, let's leave it at that...
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
As if inspired by the arrival of new inhabitants, one of the masons has withdrawn from society, having been taken by a rather strange mood.
13th Felsite, 505
I have constructed a jeweler's workshop and the moody dwarf immediately claimed it. Instead of spending hours on an end searching for the perfect materials needed for his work, he picked up the first valuable stone around and set to work...
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
17th Felsite, 505
An elven caravan has come. Only now do I notice that we do not, in fact, possess a trade depot. I have ordered the construction of one. It's in a rather unsafe location, open to enemy fire and the wrath of the elements, but access to it can be blocked by raising the bridge, which will have to suffice for now.
The mason has finished making his, um, artifact and in so doing, became a legendary gem setter. The artifact? A perfect heliodor:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
26th Felsite, 505
The trade depot was finished a few days ago and I have traded with the elves, mainly for drinks. The absence of a broker was strongly felt as I am now really not at all sure just how much profit did I give the elves. They seemed extremely content with what they got out of the trade.
The status screen at the end of Spring:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: Samthere on June 01, 2010, 08:46:24 pm
Also, Battlefailed seems to have a case of the MISSING TRADE DEPOT - every new overseer has to build another.
Nice start, though! Good job on finally paying attention to the farms - something I completely ignored because we had lots of food at the time and I couldn't be bothered :D
Finally, I took some time during an exam today to scribble the following:
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b364/tungazzio/DF/bf/muskoxtrim.jpg)
Post by: Oglokoog on June 02, 2010, 01:56:34 am
Post by: Dr. Melon on June 02, 2010, 05:53:47 am
Any profession would do, but perhaps Herbalist would be the most fitting.
"Melon, Keeper of Fruitkind" would be the preferable name :D
Post by: Samthere on June 02, 2010, 06:16:25 am
Post by: Oglokoog on June 02, 2010, 06:34:08 am
Huh, I was pretty sure you could only go up in a stairway if there was a down stair above. Or, at least, that up stairs included a floor beneath. I'll run some experiments when I have time :D
Yeah, that applies for walking monsters. But there could be flying monsters down there.
Post by: Robocorn on June 02, 2010, 11:47:01 am
also, did anyone ever get around to modding the managerial positions to be electable at attainable popuations? or are we going to long haul it until someone can rack up fifty dwarves?
Post by: Oglokoog on June 02, 2010, 02:22:22 pm
I'm getting a little disappointed in you guys. Two Titans and no giant bug skin armor. It's not like any of them had deadly blood, why didn't you butcher them? >,<
also, did anyone ever get around to modding the managerial positions to be electable at attainable popuations? or are we going to long haul it until someone can rack up fifty dwarves?
We already have 41 and I don't think many dwarves are going to die under my rule (but seeing as this IS Dwarf Fortress, I could be dead wrong), so the next ruler should get to 50. I am really bothered by the absence of a bookkeeper in particular (also a chief medical dwarf, most of the wounded could be healed, I think), but I can live with it.
EDIT: Also, the main page (b12g/dwarves) now says that 31.05 will be up soon and that it'll fix the "if-your-expedition-leader-dies-you're-fucked" bug is going to get fixed there. Mind if I wait for it? There's supposed to only be a "day or two" of testing, but we know how that usually goes, so it might not be that good of an idea...
Post by: Robocorn on June 02, 2010, 03:23:14 pm
Post by: Samthere on June 02, 2010, 05:21:34 pm
Post by: Zathel on June 03, 2010, 12:47:00 pm
Also, Samthere, your new avatar hurts my eyes.
Post by: Oglokoog on June 03, 2010, 02:38:59 pm
Post by: Robocorn on June 03, 2010, 03:06:39 pm
Post by: Samthere on June 03, 2010, 03:07:37 pm
Post by: Zathel on June 03, 2010, 03:10:10 pm
Post by: SethCreiyd on June 03, 2010, 03:25:08 pm
Is there anyone signed up who doesn't want to be dwarfed on my turn if they aren't already?
Post by: Dr. Melon on June 04, 2010, 04:34:39 am
Post by: Ilmoran on June 04, 2010, 06:33:19 am
Post by: melkorp on June 06, 2010, 09:59:45 am
Post by: Robocorn on June 06, 2010, 10:25:12 am
Post by: Oglokoog on June 06, 2010, 10:26:35 am
Seth comes after Oglokoog, If oglokoog can't get started by today then it's seth's turn.Sadly, I don't think I will be able to play today. Imma upload the end-of-spring save.
Here it is. (http://autoskolavacek.cz/files/battlefailed/battlefailed.zip)
Please post something immediately after downloading the save, I need to delete it from there as soon as possible. Thanks.
Post by: SethCreiyd on June 06, 2010, 11:13:12 am
Post by: SethCreiyd on June 06, 2010, 01:39:13 pm
===
(http://i49.tinypic.com/uod36.jpg)
The Journal of Creiyd Edusil
8th Hematite, 505, Early Summer
This is a leather bound parchment journal. Inside the journal are scrawlings in charcoal. The journal relates to the experiences of overseer Creiyd Clearlanterns at Battlefailed in 505.
(http://i49.tinypic.com/uod36.jpg)
The Journal of Creiyd Edusil
8th Hematite, 505, Early Summer
This is a leather bound parchment journal. Inside the journal are scrawlings in charcoal. The journal relates to the experiences of overseer Creiyd Clearlanterns at Battlefailed in 505.
Engraving is adversarial business. It is dwarf against earth in a battle with one inevitable outcome: the destruction of the rock, the subjugation of its form. Forever you will scar its face with the likeness you deem fit for it to have, be it any thing of beauty or otherwise.
At University back at the Mountainhome, old Baucrates the Wise would argue this point when I brought it up in my thesis. He said there is nothing adversarial about it; rock had no will to resist with, and neither did I, once I left the area, and anyone could come forth thereafter and smooth over my work, rendering my expression of will as empty as it had been before my time there.
Now then, whether or not the rock has a will, or was shaped by a will, is impossible to determine logically. But let us assume, for the sake of argument, that it has. Then, if I were not entitled to my craft, would the earth itself not swallow me whole? True, will has its time when it must be focused elsewhere, on to tasks better suited to its purpose. This usurper should have as much right to defy my will as I had to defile the rock. And perhaps the stone, in its tolerance, in its passive acceptance, has given permission.
(http://i47.tinypic.com/2my4zsi.jpg)
I came to this dismal fishing fort in order to learn to survive. It was my hope that living among the undead would raise my appreciation for life. One could say that it has. I have learned to wallow in it. Being here has taught me the world is a mass of chaos, a gibbering canvas meaningless until it has been tamed and taught form. If it does have a will of its own, 'tis a mindless will, that cares not what happens to it or anyone that meets it, for it cannot meet anyone.
(http://i49.tinypic.com/2d27wj.png)
The other reason I came here was to practice my philosophy in some secret far off place, hidden from the prying eyes of the Queen. Obviously, since she banned the Guild of Philosophers we have been forced to live in something of a shadow. There's just no work in the business, anymore.
It can't be denied that life here is interesting. My predecessors have fully documented the history of this place, which will be useful for my present task. About an hour ago, Oglokoog the Overseer stepped down from his position and nominated me as his successor. I do not understand why. We do not know each other well. I suspect my education credentials alone have qualified me. Still, I cannot fight such a bountiful turn of fate. I happily accepted.
(http://i49.tinypic.com/qz55b8.png)
(author's note: nobles glitch = fixed! hooray new version)
(author's note: nobles glitch = fixed! hooray new version)
So here I am, the new overseer, reading the relevent paperwork. It seems that when ordering this outpost built, the Queen requested 'a Dwarven Paradise.' Seems more like a tongue-in-cheek way of sentencing a few undesirables to death. I've always found the authority of royalty to be... invigorating.
Paradise, she said. I will entertain lurid thoughts of the Queen tonight, a treason far more wholesome in these pages than my mind.
Great Lur, this most humble servant thanks thee for this opportunity. I shall erect before thee a great temple, that I may be worth a nibble of the fruit of thy tempting grace.
(http://i47.tinypic.com/2q36h69.png)
O Battlefailed, thou art stone.
Post by: Oglokoog on June 06, 2010, 03:16:47 pm
Yes, you're that good.
Also, if anyone was wondering, my dwarf's custom profession is "Whateverer". And, of course, my yay can most definitely be added to the big pile of yays for the new version, the nobles glitch was bothering me for a long time.
Some notes:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: SethCreiyd on June 06, 2010, 10:42:17 pm
I have taken control of the Overseer's quarters from Samrist. It's quite comfortable. This position has its perks.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
The leader of the Mason's Guild, Cog Racksects, a dwarf I've only recently formally met, is the most beautiful person I have ever laid eyes on.
(http://i45.tinypic.com/2meer7d.png)
She speaks with the eloquence of elves, but with the fire of a dwarf. The sight of her fills me with a coldness that threatens to paralyze my spine and throw shivers down my limbs. Her intellect is keener than the sharpest blade, and when her eyes take hold of mine, it is as though every secret I have is laid bare to her, and with it there is an understanding of power, as if with a glance it is known I am hers.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Of course, she is the lover of Militia Commander Krimson. I cannot hate the dwarf, no matter how I'd like to. He's a noble enough sort. I might admit his death would be a boon if not for the sadness it would bring to bear, but to him I'll bear no ill will. For now, all I can do is watch from a distance and wait for my time.
It is fortunate I write this journal in code. It would be less fortunate if others could read it.
In other news, we have no doctor. Not a suturer nor a bone setter nor even a bloody nurse. Oglokoog has been declared Chief Medical Dwarf, but he doesn't know medicine any better than the rest of us, he just happens to be the dwarf willing to stain his hands in the attempt. Let us hope practice perfects.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
This morning there came excited shouts from the beach -- skeletal muskoxen were sighted near the front gates. They attacked the elves that were lingering about our trade depot. The elves and their animals were quickly and noisily maimed by one of the skoxen that passed through the entrance platform. This is just how I hoped my first day on the job would turn out.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
While the wounded lay moaning outside, Commander Krimson assembled the Battlefailed militia. "The Good Rocks," they call themselves. So adorable. Ten brazen dwarves prepared to hurl themselves at a terrifying enemy without even a weapon to shake. I would admire their courage if I didn't marvel at their stupidity.
(http://i45.tinypic.com/2wrlueg.png)
Skeletons are strange creatures. Despite their lack of muscles, they are unspeakably strong. As an example of this, Tolbul the swordsdwarf was thrown over the side of a wall by the skox. Three more dwarves piled on top of the creature, trying to wrestle it to the ground and immobilize it. After sighting the struggle, the rest of the fort descended into free panic.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Someone kept shouting, "The skeleton is bleeding! The skeleton is bleeding!"
(http://i47.tinypic.com/2lizqfr.png)
Kikrost and Krimson have suffered severe injuries to their legs before the beast suddenly stopped struggling, its sinister energies spent. Its rear right hoof lay scant inches from its face when it finally gave in.
(http://i49.tinypic.com/54twm.png)
We recovered our wounded, but before long, more skoxen appeared.
(http://i50.tinypic.com/8xk6qr.png)
I ordered the drawbridge raised and the doors sealed. I remember thinking those stupid elves could fend for themselves, and hoped they'd distract the monster long enough to cut ourselves off.
(http://i50.tinypic.com/24y3602.png)
Alas, the bridge was pulled too late, and a skox was locked inside as it raised. An elf and his donkey who had been standing on the bridge before it lifted were thrown into the air to land on the ground with an outspoken crunch. Trapped along with the skox were some wounded elves and their pockmarked animals.
A couple unfortunate dwarves are stuck outside with the rest of the skoxen. May Lur have pity on them and grant them quick release.
(http://i46.tinypic.com/m8h9ab.png)
Concerned, I persuaded a nearby dwarf to make a noble sacrifice for the good of the fort.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Catten was just a lowly soap maker in life, a peasant of no consequence or significance whatsoever. Ambitionless, he would have drifted through life without purpose before dying of old age, alone and forgotten. Today, on what might have been be the last day of his life, that fate would be forever altered.
Samrist and Ilmoren locked themselves inside the fishing platform away from the rampaging skox, while Catten makes a hopeless stand against it, buying time until the rest of the militia arrives.
(http://i50.tinypic.com/287ja5w.png)
As I write, he is slowly dying, blissfully unconscious after the pain in his shattered leg caused him to pass out. His throat has been gored, and he appears to be struggling for breath as blood pools in the wound. The astute may be wondering how I know this.
(http://i50.tinypic.com/t0s3ms.png)
I'm watching from above, of course. That is my job, after all.
* * *
Thanks, Oglokoog. I've taken your advice into account. So, the military had to fight the skoxen bare-fisted because the arsenal dwarf didn't have time to prepare the new manifests before the battle started. The oxen were attacking as soon as I unpaused to play. I wish they'd have the autonomy to grab a weapon in an emergency without waiting for bureaucratic approval, but such is the life of a dwarf.
I had to throw the whole jealous infatuation thing in there. It was too appropriate, given my dwarf's relationship sheet (he's a furtive, introspective, socially-awkward dwarf with two real friends, one of them is her, and he worships the god of jealousy, whereas she worships a fertility deity -- a Venus if there ever was one. Combined with her collection of Elite Wrestler and high society friends and her military lover, it's just perfect.
Anyhow, more to come.
Post by: SethCreiyd on June 07, 2010, 12:20:14 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Now that they have their axes, our militia isn't so powerless. The ox was quickly sundered, collapsing voicelessly into a pile of loosely connected and harmless bones. With the threat eliminated. order is restored. The next day, the event is almost completely forgotten. It seems we are getting used to the skanimals, and our fear of them is lessening.
I told Cog of my feelings for her, to no avail. Our relationship remains maddeningly as friends. Very well. I will subjugate my lust for the greater honor of being close to her. Such abasement shames me, but I seek the greater glory of Lur, and shall be rewarded for these trials. Rather than mope in my quarters, I've set about improving this wretched little hovel we call home. Take this underground farm that is completely unused. It should be removed to make room for something that isn't.
(http://i47.tinypic.com/zxmp2q.png)
Over the next few weeks the militia slew a few more skoxen, and with only two spare axes it has mostly still been the work of only bare hands and stoutness, with our forces sustaining only minor injuries. The harsh nature of this land seems to be weeding out all weakness in these dwarves. On a related note, Catten survived his injuries, and is resting in bed. He's now a local hero. I don't expect he will thank me.
The guard has been stationed outside while construction ensues on the new entrance. Labor production is up. With the construction of the new bedrooms, there are plenty of sleeping spaces to go around.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Samrist, the sheriff and ex-overseer, was refusing to work. Several tasks had been offered to him, none of which appeared to satisfy his lofty criteria. Finally, after being confronted, he agreed to something.
(http://i46.tinypic.com/30xd955.png)
Whatever. I don't care what he does, as long as it isn't nothing. There is too much to be done around here for there to be any laziness. I have spread this motivational outlook to our more idle workers, making them part of something they can be proud of: our new entrance hall. It was completed just in time for the human caravan to arrive.
Typically, once the last human merchant passed through our gates, a horde of skeletal horses was spotted galloping over the horizon. The caravan guards made liberal use of their impotent crossbows from the depot. One of them was counting out loud for every shot he made: "One, two, three!" I think he is an idiot.
(http://i50.tinypic.com/30agu81.png)
To the traders, we passed off a few worthless trinkets for metal, booze, wood, and food. I don't understand how these humans are so naive. Later that day, Samrist ran through the halls screaming about a brilliant idea and stopped at a Craftsdwarf's workshop. Whatever he'd thought of, he worked on it quickly. He was finished in a half-hour.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Well, it's a nice mug. I don't see the point of it, but if it brings more immigrants to this dross heap, I say we make a dozen. We need some new she-dwarves around here.
In other news, Andreus has replaced HeyGuys as bookkeeeper, while the latter recuperates from injuries sustained from something I can't remember. Also, construction on Lur's Temple is progressing nicely.
(http://i50.tinypic.com/29qlj5h.png)
We're using our abundance of coke and ore to forge new weapons and armor for our soldiers, and new picks for the miners. It seems the best use for the metal at this point.
There are too many Lur-damned animals in this fort. I awoke this morning to find dung outside my bedroom door. It has to end.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I've decided to assist in their removal.
(http://i48.tinypic.com/303b5z6.png)
Earlier this foggy afternoon, another herd of skhorses was seen charging the fort from across the sand. The gates were promptly ordered shut.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Poor Id, a farmer of some sort, was trapped outside with the horses and was trampled to death. Pity, as she was a pretty lass. She was the spouse of our broker; I expect Melkorp will be unhappy to learn of his wife's demise.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
What else? I think Cog and Krimson are planning to marry. No migrants so far this year. To hell with them. A milker died of thirst. I don't remember his name. This damned fortress can drown anon in an ocean of piss for all I'd care that I'd not see the morrow.
(http://i46.tinypic.com/28m1tfa.png)(http://i50.tinypic.com/v6rr68.png)
* * *
It has deadly dust! Of course it does! But I don't think it can reach us. It's just aimlessly swimming around in the under-river.
And Melkorp couldn't have cared less when his wife was killed. I lol'd when I saw that.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on June 07, 2010, 12:35:53 am
<.<
Also requesting turn.
Post by: SethCreiyd on June 07, 2010, 12:43:27 am
Spoiler: Big Spoiler: (click to show/hide)
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on June 07, 2010, 01:04:06 am
Also, I have changed my last name. That was intentional. Seriously, do you realize how many people giggle when you say your last name is Zulbananan?
Post by: Oglokoog on June 07, 2010, 01:19:23 am
Post by: Robocorn on June 07, 2010, 01:56:32 am
I've processed Urist Imiknorris's request for placement.
I wonder if the prescence of the forgotten beast will ward off any titans that may come strolling through. Fourtunately our FB lacks the power of flight.
How do monsters keep getting in? I had two drawbridges set up by the end of my turn, I'm sure either Andreus or Samthere constructed new drawbridges. How is it that our defense mechanisms are so ineffective?
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on June 07, 2010, 02:07:48 am
Also merchants. Just like in Nist Akath, the elves are used to lower our defenses so the skelks can enter.
Post by: SethCreiyd on June 07, 2010, 02:44:30 am
* * *
Autumn arrived, along with our outpost liaison the same day. He was a human, and a very odd human he was. In retrospect, all the foreigners that come here have acted a bit strangely, but Rigoth stood out in particular. I refer to him in the past tense because his peculiar actions led him to a rather noteworthy end.
(http://i47.tinypic.com/waqb9z.png)
He reached the front of our gates, but instead of walking into the fortress as any rational being might, he took off in chase of some elk (of a non-skeletal sort, for a change). Why he did this, no one is certain. He bounded off to the south in pursuit, laughing, leaving us scratching our beards in bewilderment, wondering if this accursed beach holds a bane to the senses only dwarves are immune to.
(http://i46.tinypic.com/2nr10sn.png)
Rigoth chased the elk directly into a group of kobolds armed with copper swords which had been hiding half-buried in the sand. They popped out of the ground on every side of him.
(http://i49.tinypic.com/9uvjw0.png)
It was over quickly. Once he had stopped moving, the kobolds charged the front gates, spattered in the blood of our former liaison. The Good Rocks were there to meet them. In a flash of iron, three of the vermin were dead. Confronted by superior forces, the kobolds fled quickly, but not before they left their mark.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Obok lost his entire left arm, and Kikrost is missing most of her right. Still, they are alive, they will grow stronger, their sacrifice having served its purpose. Battlefailed is safe.
(http://i50.tinypic.com/1zxmrg1.png)
In fact, Kikrost is one of the most impressive dwarves I have ever seen. She refused assistance, and walked herself off the battlefield, clutching her own gory stump hard enough to stem the bleeding. And the entire while, she never dropped her shield. The rest of the soldiers have started calling her "The Iron Vanguard."
Not only that, The Vanguard has avoided medical attention completely. Astonishing our doctor, she refused to be taken off duty. I assume she's suffered some trauma from her ordeal. I do not believe in such bravery of its own sake, but as long as she remains useful, I won't complain about it.
(http://i48.tinypic.com/6f0epf.png)
Tragedy struck during an attempt to access the subterranean magma. Urist the Blue was drowned in a flash flood when one of of the walls surrounding the river was breached. Fortunately, the flood poses no threat to the fortress, but I doubt we'll ever recover Urist's corpse.
(http://i47.tinypic.com/j5xgzp.png)
A new route has been planned to the future site of our magma forges.
(http://i45.tinypic.com/azfm3d.png)
Before Winter sets in, a few statues have been tastefully arranged by the main entrance, and traps are being rigged between them. The more protection we have from the undead animals outside, the better.
(http://i48.tinypic.com/2zxm5gi.png)
As Autumn draws to a close, I find myself in an unfamiliar state. I am unable to wrench away from Cog's hold over me. She has possessed my intention without an attempt. This has never happened to me before. I have confided in Andreus my troubles. He suggested it is love that I feel. What a ridiculous notion. What I feel is a hopeless infatuation complicated by my obsessive single-mindedness. I simply can't help it.
Spoiler: Meanwhile... (click to show/hide)
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on June 07, 2010, 02:53:21 am
Post by: SethCreiyd on June 07, 2010, 03:49:10 am
The giant turtle hasn't attacked. It's swimming around the underground sea like the dimetrodon.
I wanted to get some magma workshops in, but the accident that killed Urist the Blue delayed that project past the spring. The new location is just about finished and the next overseer should be ready to build some forges and kilns shortly.
We're short on wood. I used as much coal as I could smelting new picks, axes, and breastplates, but we're out now. Smithing is going to be bottlenecked pretty tightly until those magma forges get going.
Cog is about to snap. If any more of her friends die, I worry she'll go berserk, and she's a feisty one. Keep an eye on her.
Anyway, the fortress is in good shape for the amount of Dwarves it contains. I think it could survive for a long time with the gates raised. The biggest problem I can think of is the lack of migrants/caravans. The Dwarven caravan never showed up. Methinks that bodes ill.
One more thing, I played and saved with 31.05, so it should probably be loaded with that, too.
Almost forgot! Save File at DFFD. (http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=2463)
* * *
Winters, for me, have followed a discernible pattern. Every one of them has been unbearably boring aside from a few dramatic events that spring up here and there. This Winter began with some excitement.
(http://i48.tinypic.com/2hnqi35.png)
Never before have I seen such a strange and enormous being. The alarm was speedily raised, and The Good Rocks sallied forth. The Iron Vanguard led the assault, carrying a shield in her only hand.
(http://i46.tinypic.com/9aajro.png)
The dwarves fell upon the titan with their characteristic shriek of a battle cry. The beast was rent asunder by dozens of savage blows, fiercely paced and truly aimed. We will eat well for a very long time.
(http://i46.tinypic.com/29zlnl.png)
On the last day of Winter, Atreku, the Arsenal Dwarf, gave birth to a girl. On the first day of spring, an old work horse died of old age. A fitting reminder that life and death are not water and oil to each other.
(http://i48.tinypic.com/291yul1.png)
And since Spring has arrived, I must turn over the fortress to the next overseer. I am happy to relinquish the mantle of leadership. I have tasted the position of official authority and honestly, its restrictions are a bit much for me to deal with. I look forward to some free time, and the change to focus on the final touches of Lur's Temple. It has been too long since I touched chisel to raw stone, and I need to return to my art.
(http://i46.tinypic.com/317gni9.png)
Besides, I have learned from Cog that in order to rule, one need not rule. One need only rule the ruler.
* * *
Spoiler: Epilogue (click to show/hide)
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on June 07, 2010, 03:53:15 am
Also, two dimetrodons in one year? What are the odds?
Post by: Samthere on June 07, 2010, 06:00:17 am
I have taken control of the Overseer's quarters from Samrist. It's quite comfortable. This position has its perks.
Samrist, the sheriff and ex-overseer, was refusing to work. Several tasks had been offered to him, none of which appeared to satisfy his lofty criteria. Finally, after being confronted, he agreed to something.
(http://i46.tinypic.com/30xd955.png)
Whatever. I don't care what he does, as long as it isn't nothing.
Well naturally! All I can imagine his response would be is, "BUILD YER OWN DAMN CHAMBERS!" It even has the letter S in the middle :P
Apart from that, awesome going. Loved it from the intro on. I'll get over it eventually. :D
Post by: Zathel on June 07, 2010, 12:32:03 pm
I just took a look at the fortress. It's such a far shot from my usual clean, organized, neatly planned and compact fortresses that I think it will take a good while before I even start to make sense of the
I mean, seriously, a furniture stockpile in a mined-out hematite vein?
Also, 100 z-levels to magma sea. There goes my brave plan to bring magma up to the fortress proper. I can't even begin to think how I'd power a pump stack this high.
On a second thought, I'll start tomorrow. I thought playing some DF would be a good relaxation method after today's exam, but I'm just too tired.
Post by: Dr. Melon on June 07, 2010, 12:42:05 pm
I AM KEEPER OF THE FRUIT, PAST AND PRESENT.
Post by: SethCreiyd on June 07, 2010, 01:13:24 pm
Edit: Even had a little screenshot.
(http://i49.tinypic.com/28245nb.png)
I forgot to mention that Catten got a strange mood toward the end of the turn. I don't think he started working yet.
Also, I used 31.05.
Sorry about the eviction Sam. Wasn't anything personal. That's the kinda jerk-ass my dwarf was; see something he'd like, and he'd take it if he could. His karma was that he'd be denied the one thing he truly ever desired.
If it's any consolation, Samrist got the biggest box-house. :)
Further edit: Zathel, I dunno how I missed it, but I forgot to dwarf you. My apologies.
Post by: Wightfyre on June 07, 2010, 06:05:55 pm
Also, 100 z-levels to magma sea. There goes my brave plan to bring magma up to the fortress proper. I can't even begin to think how I'd power a pump stack this high.
I'm thinking a massive Dwarven Reactor (http://df.magmawiki.com/index.php/DF2010:Water_wheel#Dwarven_Water_Reactor) ought to do the trick... Just calculate the required power and build to suit.
Post by: melkorp on June 07, 2010, 06:57:24 pm
Post by: Oglokoog on June 08, 2010, 01:34:00 am
Post by: Robocorn on June 08, 2010, 01:36:45 am
I'm sure you'll all have a fun time getting magma.
Post by: Zathel on June 08, 2010, 03:30:43 am
I like to solve problems with bringing magma up by bringing stuff down. Like farms, sleeping rooms, everything. I usually basically build a whole another fort for the smelters and 'smiths and other assorted forgecrew there. Dunno if that's an option here.
I... think I might take it even further. I might move the whole thing down those 80-something z-levels, the current fortress is a fucking mess (I think we have enough miners, only problem would be bringing stuff to trade depot when caravans come). I'll finally get around to playing this evening.
Post by: SethCreiyd on June 08, 2010, 03:45:23 am
I was looking at the fort after my turn, and noticed that the flood that killed Urist the Blue is spilling down a staircase into the magma sea. It might be worth some fps to cap it.
Post by: Zathel on June 08, 2010, 03:55:29 am
You can build the Trade Depot 80-something z-levels below with everything else. Make the traders walk the distance.
I was looking at the fort after my turn, and noticed that the flood that killed Urist the Blue is spilling down a staircase into the magma sea. It might be worth some fps to cap it.
I'd have to build a ramp stairway (standard design in my current fort), since as far as I know traders can't use normal stairs... but it is an interesting idea.
Post by: Dr. Melon on June 08, 2010, 09:12:08 am
(http://i645.photobucket.com/albums/uu172/my-hidden-agena/love-heart.jpg)
Post by: Zathel on June 08, 2010, 05:15:49 pm
***
Seasonal Development Progress Report, year 506, form BRT-325, in accordance to 3rd Directive of Bureau of Colonization
Fortress name: Battlefailed
Fortress status: Outpost
Bookmaster: Unib "Zathel" Ottanlimul
Due to illness I was suffering from for the past year, I was unable to establish proper Bookkeeping practices in the outpost of Battlefailed. For that reason, preparation of proper reports in accordance to established law concerning colonization efforts can only be begun now.
After recovering, I have immediately taken over the governance of the outpost after previous "Overseer" stepped down, in my opinion, due to melancholic mood caused by some tragic romantic entanglement. Most undwarfy. What I saw when finally free of delirious fever I have been afflicted with terrified me.
Battlefailed is a bundle of total and utter chaos. While piles of corpses littering the surrounding oceanside are understandable, considering the location of the outpost, what truly struck my dwarven soul is the sorry, for the lack of proper word describing the entropy reining here, state of the interior. The layout, or rather, complete lack of it, prevents any and all attempts to carry out any proper crafting or construction work. There are stockpiles EVERYWHERE. Refuse stockpiles, food stockpiles, goods stockpiles scattered all over the way too many floors of the outpost. Someone even piled dozens of units of furniture in a space left after mining out a hematite vein. A furniture stockpile in a hematite vein. A VEIN. Zombie muskoxen on the pier leading to fishing platform. Sorry excuse of militia running around with human-made weapons, dressed in tattered rags.
Another horrifying point is the absence of organized living space. There are few mined out bedrooms, lacking any coherent design, and communal dormitory.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Also, time has been wasted on carving out completely unnecessary... temple of some sort, because it can't be anything else. Waste of dwarfhours, if you ask me, even if it is supposedly dedicated to Lur.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I have deemed the current carved out spaced completely unfit for further usage. I have proceeded to plan a proper fortress deeper in the earth, around the third layer of underground caverns and the magma sea situated underneath it.
After hard, but deeply satisfying work I laid out plans for new, better Battlefailed - efficient, two-layered (with expansion prospect) workshop floor/warehouse, based on patented design by Urist Doledod and connected with farm-space that will be irrigated from cavern lake, following instructions in "Irrigation and I" by Olmul Kathilul, standardized living pods, variant 3c, proper hospital and water reservoir, connected to irrigation system pump stack for efficiency. And a practical dining hall. No silliness.
Not long after I sent out designs for mining, an artifact was completed by a member of militia.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
End of Granite brought up another sign of wastefulness and incompetence of previous designated administrator - he ordered mass slaughter of animals without providing proper storage space for meat and fat. Butchers shops were flooded with miasma. I designated emergency stockpile in nearby corridor... the place is beyond hope anyway.
A group of 20 migrants arrived in the third week of Slate. Sadly, I must conclude that they will be mostly a burden, as current outpost profile predicts gainful employment of only a small number of them. Apart from the brewer, cook, glassmaker and two crafters, they are all pretty useless in current situation... especially the two hunters. I don't know what made them think that traveling to undead-infested plains was a good idea. This migration brings about one other problem - Battlefailed exceeded population levels of an outpost, and in accordance to proper regulations concerning municipal management of communities, elections will have to be held soon.
Elven caravan braved the cursed Blueness of Malodors to trade with our community, arriving in the third week of Felsite. It gave me the opportunity to replace the previous broker with someone more competent... even I know more about appraisal, and I only took a summer course loosely connected to the topic during my studies at Mountainhomes. I ordered purchase of as much wood, barrels, and alcohol as was possible with our pitiful stocks of trade goods. I need to order some more stone goods before the next caravan.
Remaining weeks of spring were uneventful. There was no trouble with undead denizens of the plains, and the work on fortress proper is progressing smoothly. I anticipate finishing the necessary mining by the end of autumn.
End of report
Signed,
Unib "Zathel" Ottanlimul, Bookmaster and temporary administrator of Battlefailed.
Edit: some typos
Post by: Samthere on June 08, 2010, 05:49:05 pm
Nice start!
Post by: SethCreiyd on June 08, 2010, 06:57:53 pm
If I may, a fitting punishment for Creiyd would be an assignment as head garbagedwarf.
However, I defend the use of that hematite vein. It was empty space, and those mechanisms had to go somewhere.
Post by: Robocorn on June 08, 2010, 10:17:56 pm
After hard, but deeply satisfying work I laid out plans for new, better Battlefailed - efficient, two-layered (with expansion prospect) workshop floor/warehouse, based on patented design by Urist Doledod and connected with farm-space that will be irrigated from cavern lake, following instructions in "Irrigation and I" by Olmul Kathilul, standardized living pods, variant 3c, proper hospital and water reservoir, connected to irrigation system pump stack for efficiency. And a practical dining hall. No silliness.
Aren't there several major obstacles in the way of this grand scheme, obstacles that involve deadly dust and noxious secretions? I'm looking forward to you fighting them because I take sadistic glee in everything that happens to Battlefailed (In the history file I'm listed as an enemy anyway).
An organized Battlefailed seems just strange enough to work, and all of those undead herds wandering the caverns will give it that homey smell we've been looking for.
Post by: Zathel on June 09, 2010, 01:42:29 am
Aren't there several major obstacles in the way of this grand scheme, obstacles that involve deadly dust and noxious secretions? I'm looking forward to you fighting them because I take sadistic glee in everything that happens to Battlefailed (In the history file I'm listed as an enemy anyway).
An organized Battlefailed seems just strange enough to work, and all of those undead herds wandering the caverns will give it that homey smell we've been looking for.
Any access to caverns, as of now, is sealed, I have plotted a path for the spiral staircase that winds its way completely inside the rock formations. Only breach of deepest cavern layers will occur when I will have to irrigate the farms and fill the reservoir.
Then, of course, if time allows I will set up woodcutting and mining operation in the caverns, with all the FUN that comes with it.
I wish I had more competent miners, but someone drafted them into military and they refuse to do anything else than train. Another update coming this evening, gotta scram to the library and write my thesis.
Post by: Zathel on June 09, 2010, 02:58:27 pm
***
Seasonal Development Progress Report, year 506, form BRT-325, in accordance to 3rd Directive of Bureau of Colonization
Fortress name: Battlefailed
Fortress status: Town
Bookmaster: Unib "Zathel" Ottanlimul
Hematite was pretty uneventful. Work on the fort proper is progressing smoothly. Citizens of Battlefailed elected Ral Athelurus mayor in elections that miraculously did not breach any regulations. I have better things to worry about than assigning him quarters befitting his rank... and if it was my choice, I'd just chuck him a standard living pod room, but it's "tradition" for the mayor to have opulent quarters. Also, Ilmoran got a fey mood. I wonder what he'll make? A statue inscribed with images of merchants getting stomped into ground by undead wildlife? At least I could make some use of that, unlike the previous creation of "inspired" dwarven mind.
In Malachite, the new Mayor, in total inconsideration for the atrocious state of the fortress, ordered construction of items from bronze. But, an order is an order, and I immediately sent out necessary forms.
As for the artifact created by Ilmoran, I wasn't far off in my predictions.
(http://i45.tinypic.com/90r4fs.png)
Ideal item for new barracks, if and when I will get around to designing them.
After fulfilling the request for bronze items for mayor, he immediately ordered even more bronze items, and now I have no excuse not to fulfill his request. If bronze is so important to Battlefailed, why not prohibit the export of bronze items?
Miners have been complaining about the location of future magma steelworks. Of course the stone is damp, you are mining directly beneath the lake, what did they expect, scorching sand? I have made sure that mining layout is compliant with Occupational Health and Safety regulations, they should have more faith.
Human caravan arrived in third third week of Galena. I exchanged some of our trade goods (of rather high quality, even if made from subpar material) for metal, wood and alcohol. I have also decided to finally get rid of two zombie muskoxen on the pier leading to fishing platform... some incompetent hauler tripped and dropped a bin of goods in sight of oxen and was too scared to go and retrieve it, despite the fact that there was no danger whatsoever. Not soon later a lone skeletal muskox tried to get into the fortress, but got caught by a cage trap. I have no idea whatsoever what to do with the damned thing.
Overall, summer was peaceful and productive. Apart from that one muskox, there was no trouble from undead, the halls of new fort are nearly complete, food and drink is plentiful (according to my calculations, current stocks of alcohol should last for at least another year and half, even if they were never resupplied). It is my sincere hope that autumn will be the same.
End of report
Signed,
Unib "Zathel" Ottanlimul, Bookmaster and temporary administrator of Battlefailed.
edit: typos and minor stuff again
Post by: Oglokoog on June 09, 2010, 03:46:57 pm
Post by: Zathel on June 09, 2010, 03:53:18 pm
You portray your dwarf's (or perhaps your own?) sense of superiority rather skillfully :D
I've spent past two weeks reading books about translation studies, where one smart ass bashes another smart ass (using proper academic discourse, of course) for creating stupid theory of translation, then presents his own theory, which is equally shitty and gets trashed in next publication I read. Vicious cycle, I tell ya, with no end in sight...
It might just show though in my writing.
Post by: Oglokoog on June 09, 2010, 04:11:37 pm
Post by: Zathel on June 09, 2010, 04:19:46 pm
Yeah. Also, a minor complaint; you omit articles sometimes. It's not as annoying as "their all dead", but it's enough to make my grammar nazi sense tingle ;)
The woes of non-native English speaker. Even though I am a student of philology, I still have problems with articles in English (I think I just internalized that part of language wrong, and now it's nigh-impossible to change), especially when I don't focus on remembering about them.
Post by: Oglokoog on June 09, 2010, 04:28:06 pm
I am not a native English speaker either. Actually, I've noticed that native English speakers tend to make more mistakes in English than people for whom English is a second(ary) language. But that's neither here nor there, really.Yeah. Also, a minor complaint; you omit articles sometimes. It's not as annoying as "their all dead", but it's enough to make my grammar nazi sense tingle ;)The woes of non-native English speaker. Even though I am a student of philology, I still have problems with articles in English (I think I just internalized that part of language wrong, and now it's nigh-impossible to change), especially when I don't focus on remembering about them.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on June 09, 2010, 09:28:26 pm
Post by: heyguys on June 10, 2010, 07:21:32 pm
Post by: Robocorn on June 10, 2010, 07:26:02 pm
we should hope you're following, you're the next player.
Post by: Oglokoog on June 11, 2010, 01:26:32 am
Post by: Zathel on June 11, 2010, 02:11:11 am
Post by: Zathel on June 11, 2010, 01:52:07 pm
Seasonal Development Progress Report, year 506, form BRT-325, in accordance to 3rd Directive of Bureau of Colonization
Fortress name: Battlefailed
Fortress status: Town
Bookmaster: Unib "Zathel" Ottanlimul
First day of fall welcomed me with a rather annoying news. It turns out that I have made some minor design mistakes while adapting workshop layouts for Battlefailed's needs. It's nothing major, and easily remedied, but it serves as a vital reminder that I need to be more careful. Also, I am now completely certain that the mayor suffers from unhealthy fascination with bronze. I have decided to indulge him, it will keep him from whining about not having proper accommodations. I hope citizens of Battlefailed will make a more... reasonable choice during the next election.
I have employed the entirety of citizenry to haul ores, unrefined fuel and marble to the future magma metalworks. At least they'll have something to do while miners complete their assignment. And it seems they will do so within predicted time constraints. Splendid.
Curses! A goblin ambush, just as a caravan arrived! I thought Battlefailed was free of the greenskin filth! They were quickly dealt with by the caravan guard, but not before the traders sustained injuries. During the attack, one of them went mad, apparently snapping after traversing the cursed plains surrounding our fortress. Thankfully we're well supplied, and even if this caravan leaves before trading with us, Battlefailed will be fine.
I am wondering if it's a coincidence, but one of our carpenters was struck by inspiration and withdrew to his workshops. I wonder what he'll come up with? A bed? A statue? Only time will tell.
There number of thieves and snatchers that try to invade the fortress is starting to worry me. Thankfully, the traps work, and kobolds are quickly dispatched by our militia.
The artifact that the carpenter worked on turned out to be a crutch. Somehow, I am not surprised, given what he had as inspiration.
(http://i50.tinypic.com/2ihqowo.png)
Apart from the goblins, autumn was pretty uneventful. Fortress proper is mined out and awaiting settlement. When next spring comes, Battlefailed will truly become a true dwarven fortress.
End of report
Signed,
Unib "Zathel" Ottanlimul, Bookmaster and temporary administrator of Battlefailed.
Post by: Robocorn on June 11, 2010, 04:28:51 pm
I hadn't noticed until a little earlier, but Aluonra (the world we're playing in) has a population made up half by goblins and residents of goblin forts. Hell, the entire western half of the world is dominated by their purple settlements broken up by only a few mountain halls. The closest nearby construction is a dark tower, I wonder why they didn't come before (comparatively, kobolds live exclusively in two caves very far away and there's no justification for them being anywhere.
Post by: Zathel on June 11, 2010, 05:12:14 pm
All of your planning and competence is a far cry from the origins we held back with two tantruming dwarves and a hole.
A ma... dwarf has to have a vision, doesn't he? No matter how humble the origins, with enough blood, tears and vomit one can achieve anything.
I hadn't noticed until a little earlier, but Aluonra (the world we're playing in) has a population made up half by goblins and residents of goblin forts. Hell, the entire western half of the world is dominated by their purple settlements broken up by only a few mountain halls. The closest nearby construction is a dark tower, I wonder why they didn't come before (comparatively, kobolds live exclusively in two caves very far away and there's no justification for them being anywhere.
Really? Well, that's just downright weird they left Battlefailed alone for so long. If I knew they'd come, I'd have launched steel production much earlier. Oh well, I can always seal off the fort if shit hits the fan a little too hard.
Post by: heyguys on June 12, 2010, 06:30:59 am
we should hope you're following, you're the next player.
lol. I know, that's why I posted. I'm really looking foward to this one. By the way, is this popped into .06 or using the original embark version?
I've been learning things in my spare time.
Post by: Oglokoog on June 12, 2010, 07:25:54 am
we should hope you're following, you're the next player.
lol. I know, that's why I posted. I'm really looking foward to this one. By the way, is this popped into .06 or using the original embark version?
I've been learning things in my spare time.
I played in .04, or so I think. Definitely import it into .06, if it was going to break, it would've done so long ago.
Post by: heyguys on June 12, 2010, 07:43:51 am
Killing a Titan or Beast is a death sentence in .06. Not because of poison or disease or anything, but because of a bug.
Killing a Titan results in the killer getting an extra legendary name, and he names his favorite weapon (which dealt the killing blow) a legendary name that shows up in the artifacts list.
But there is one problem. That soldier will rename that same weapon every other week or so, resulting in a pause screen each time. As I result I usually send them to fight the next goblin wave alone before sending the rest of the military.
Post by: Oglokoog on June 12, 2010, 10:10:22 am
Post by: heyguys on June 12, 2010, 10:19:46 am
You can turn that off in announcements (one of the init files), or at least it used to be possible.
Thanks a lot, that really helped.
Post by: Zathel on June 12, 2010, 04:46:36 pm
***
Seasonal Development Progress Report, year 506, form BRT-325, in accordance to 3rd Directive of Bureau of Colonization
Fortress name: Battlefailed
Fortress status: Town
Bookmaster: Unib "Zathel" Ottanlimul
The mining works are complete, and since rubble was regularly hauled away behind the miners, the work can finally begin now.
In other news, mad trader god done in by skeletal horses, who then proceeded to attempt to invade the fort, toppling the statue in the progress. Which revealed a fatal defense flaw... toppled statue gave way to bypassing the first line of traps. I have ordered deconstruction of the statues and building of walls in their place.
For that matter, I have ordered deconstruction of whole temporary living and utility space just below the ground.
Work is slow, but steady. I will have to give up my position as temporary administrator of Battlefailed before I see the full glory of the new fortress, but maybe that's for the better.
The end of my term wasn't peaceful and pleasant. Another goblin ambush came in the last days of Obsidian. My hopes of letting the traps take care of the invaders were crushed when few goblin snatchers got caught in them. Thankfully, the raiders delayed their advance long enough to allow the militia to amass. One brief scuffle later all the greenskins were dead.
Overall, it was a very productive year, but the work is not yet finished. Stockpiles need to be established and moved, new farmspace flooded, dwarves settled in the living pods and magma metalworks built. But that is all the work for the next administrator. I will retread to my new quarters in living pods and busy myself with stockpile records.
End of report
Signed,
Unib "Zathel" Ottanlimul, Bookmaster and temporary administrator of Battlefailed.
***
Well, that was fun. I absolutely love establishing forts, more so than actually managing them, so it was a perfect turn for me. I moved the version to 0.31.06.
I want another turn :D
Good god, I hate my upload speed. It's taking forever.
And here it is http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=2496
Post by: Robocorn on June 12, 2010, 05:27:07 pm
Contacting heyguys and organizing the posts.
Post by: heyguys on June 13, 2010, 05:22:16 am
Post by: Zathel on June 13, 2010, 11:11:26 am
Checking in; currently downloading. Will try porting to .06 and see how that works. Expect an update today.
I moved the version to 0.31.06.
It works fine.
Post by: SethCreiyd on June 13, 2010, 03:47:29 pm
I'd like another turn sometime too, please.
Post by: heyguys on June 14, 2010, 07:36:33 am
Post by: Robocorn on June 14, 2010, 08:06:35 am
Areku I think
Post by: TurkeyXIII on June 17, 2010, 12:50:13 pm
Post by: Robocorn on June 17, 2010, 06:13:53 pm
I look forward to what happens on your turn, we've yet to go in the caverns and there's a lot of Fun stuff in evil biomes underground.
Post by: Meanmelter on June 18, 2010, 04:42:40 am
Post by: Robocorn on June 18, 2010, 05:28:39 am
The only thing we seem to have here is a lot of people who run out of time just as their turn arrives and a weird tradition of rebuilding the trader's depot every year.
Post by: Zathel on June 18, 2010, 07:49:25 am
Nope, a standard one year succession game, pretty unintuitive.
The only thing we seem to have here is a lot of people who run out of time just as their turn arrives and a weird tradition of rebuilding the trader's depot every year.
That reminds me, we need to move the depot underground, there's 5x5 carved out space near the stairway.
Post by: TurkeyXIII on June 18, 2010, 10:08:32 am
Post by: Robocorn on June 18, 2010, 10:22:15 am
I know, but that's the least of my concerns at the moment. :oA good sign if I've ever seen one
Post by: SethCreiyd on June 18, 2010, 12:02:39 pm
Post by: ClaidheamhMor16 on June 18, 2010, 01:20:17 pm
Tell me when you want me to PM you the download link. Check up on the final succession game story.
Once you get online your going to play year 2 and log everything of importance and try to make it immersive and funny.
Use the format that MeanMelter did.
Here's the link to the thread and so help me god TAKE PICTURES.
Also read his entire log.
http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=59564.0
Post by: melkorp on June 18, 2010, 05:47:17 pm
Post by: TurkeyXIII on June 20, 2010, 08:17:51 am
Engraved on the wall is an image of 'Turkey XIII' Pulledportal the dwarf. 'Turkey XIII' Pulledportal is travelling. The artwork relates to the settling of the dwarf 'Turkey XIII' Pulledportal in Lower Battlefailed in the early spring of 507.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Engraved on the wall is an image of Riqui Roaredsmokes the Forgotten Beast and dwarves. Rigui Roaredsmokes is striking a menacing pose. The dwarves are cowering. The artwork relates to the attack the of the Forgotten Beast Riqui Roaredsmokes in Battlefailed in the early spring of 507.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Engraved on the wall is an image of Rakust Battlearrows the dwarf and Riqui Roaredsmokes the forgotten beast. Riqui Roaredsmokes is making a plaintive guesture. Rakust Battlearrows is laughing. The artwork relates to the fatal wounding of the forgotten beast Riqui Roaredsmokes by the dwarf Rakust Battlearrows in Battlefailed in the early spring of 507.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Engraved on the wall is an image of 'Melon' Letterseized the dwarf and dwarves. The dwarves are refusing 'Melon' Letterseized. 'Melon' Letterseized looks dejected. The artwork relates to the removal of the dwarf 'Melon' Letterseized the dwarf from the position of chief medical dwarf of the Oar of Ankles in the early spring of 507.
I had some rearranging to do, as Melon was our best weaponsmith. He was replaced by a dwarf named Goden Flagthrowers who posessed some suturing skill. Oglokoog SnarledFenced was taken off mining for a similar reason, to become an armorer. I also condensed the militia into one squad for simplicity, led by Samrist (I think).
Engraved on the wall is an image of 'Heyguys' Praisedboot the dwarf. 'Heyguys' Praisedboot is in the fetal position. The artwork relates to the dehydration of the dwarf 'Heyguys' Praisedboot in Battlefailed in the mid spring of 507.
The old hospital zone in upper battlefailed is (or was until just now) still functional, but without any furniture. The new Chief Medical Dwarf prefers to cut open our injured with a scalpel than give them water, so we've lost two dwarves to dehydration and are about to lose another. All the haulers are busy moving shit downstairs to take care of anybody, and will probably be doing that for a couple more months at least.
Engraved on the wall is an image of Sodel Whiplens the dwarf and Withercharm the Blind Ring the mica piccolo. Sodel Whiplens is raising Withercharm the Blind Ring. The artwork relates to the creation of the mica piccolo Withercharm the Blind Ring by Sodel Whiplens in Battlefailed in the mid spring of 507.
The fisherdwarf who got mauled and breathed on by the forgotten beast became all secretive less than a week later, stormed out of the hospital and began moping around until I built him a craftdwarf's workshop. The artifact is pretty boring, but it still took him over a month to make because he insisted on collecting raw materials from upper battlefailed every time.
Engraved on the wall is an image of Kadol Quakedip the dwarf. Kadol Quakedip is travelling. The artwork relates to the settling of the dwarf Kadol Quakedip in Battlefailed in the mid spring of 507.
Engraved on the wall is an image of Kadol Quakedip the dwarf and a skeletal horse. Kadol Quakedip is making a plaintive guesture. The skeletal horse is making a menacing pose. The artwork relates to the confrontation of the dwarf Kadol Quakedip and a skeletal horse in Battlefailed in the mid spring of 507.
I've been more-or-less ignoring the local fauna but a migrant wave of 22 dwarves popped up right next to a herd of skeletal horses.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: Robocorn on June 20, 2010, 09:27:07 am
I'm a little surprised we have half decent battledwarves considering all the random ambushes we get. I suppose that must support them somehow, but it's nice to know we actually killed a forgotten beast for a change instead of hiding until something else killed it.
I'm ever amused when the migration patterns of dwarves mirror migration patterns of undead. Maybe with all these loafers they'll finally give us a dungeon master.
Post by: Zathel on June 20, 2010, 01:28:13 pm
As for the "lower" Battlefailed... well, that pump stack rising out from the deepest cavern layer is supposed to flood the farmspace located just below the stockpiles and supply the reservoir just below the hospital zone, which is located... I think under the dining room. The reservoir access also has additional floodgate set up to power whatever else my successors might need or want to build - dwarven water reactors, maybe? At least that was my intention when I ordered building it.
That water ditch right next to magma metalworks is not my creation. Its a result of accidental breaching of the lake by Seth Creiyd, I think?
Post by: TurkeyXIII on June 21, 2010, 08:58:50 am
When the elf caravan arrived, they hung around at the edge of the map because I'd neglected to build the Depot. I sent the military out again to keep the zombie elks away while an architect hauled three bars of fine pewter 100 z-levels.
Engraved on the wall is an image of Elano Fificonibo the elf and Aslot Sosbubsospu the goblin. Aslot sosbubsospu is striking down Elano Fificonibo. The artwork relates to the killing of the elf Elanso Fificonibo by the goblin Aslot Sosbubsospu in Battlefailed in the late spring of 507.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
The area seemed secured, but two groups of goblins popped out of nowhere, one on either side of the huddled group of merchants.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I'd had good feedback from the militia in the last few encounters, so I casually ordered the charge. A few soldiers chased speargoblins south, while a hammerlord dove headfirst into the squad of axegoblins.
Engraved on the wall is an image of Medtob Mirrorsearched the dwarf and Aslot Sosbubsospu the goblin. Aslot sosbubsospu is striking down Medtob Mirrorsearched. The artwork relates to the killing of the dwarf Medtob Mirrorsearched by the goblin Aslot Sosbubsospu in Battlefailed in the late spring of 507.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Then came a harsh reminder of why I first underestimated the military: They are seriously underequipped for this kind of fight. The hammerdwarf and macedwarf K.O. 3 goblins between them, but not before Medtob was disemboweled. Iron axes, bronze maces and silver swords can't do enough damage fast enough, and our guys didn't have much in the way of armor either. I retreated as many soldiers into the fort as I can, but one was cut off by goblins and another two ran past the entrance toward the northern beach. I closed off the fort while the goblins were still chasing the elves and dwarves around, abandoning the remaining three dwarves on the surface in the hope I could wait it out.
Engraved on the wall is an image of Kikrost Ropelion the dwarf and Ngom Jackalwaxed the goblin. Kikrost Ropelion is striking down Ngom Jackalwaxed. The artwork relates to the killing of the goblin Ngom Jackalwaxed by the dwarf Kikrost Ropelion in Battlefailed in the late spring of 507.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
With the fort sealed I reactivated the outside soldiers to see them fight for my own amusement. A recruit died quickly, the other sworddwarf who ran past the entrance lead the goblins around the beach for a bit before taking one with him on the way out.
Kikrost Godenkurel, the Iron Vanguard, the axedwarf with an arm missing at the elbow and a dent in her skull - She didn't go down so easily. She took on five goblins at once, brutalising the first she came across into a broken wreck. The other four decided they'd taken enough losses for one day, and retreated. Kikrost saw to it that the last of the goblins exit the map before collapsing on the grass to sleep, exhausted. The siege broken, the drawbridge was lowered and Kikrost walked back inside.
That water ditch right next to magma metalworks is not my creation.Too late, I've already changed your profession.
(http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y144/Turkey_OO7/battlefaileda6.png)
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on June 21, 2010, 09:40:42 am
Post by: Zathel on June 21, 2010, 12:23:01 pm
Too late, I've already changed your profession.
(http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y144/Turkey_OO7/battlefaileda6.png)
Eh, it fits. Excessive bureaucracy is madness, after all.
Post by: SethCreiyd on June 21, 2010, 03:24:19 pm
Post by: TurkeyXIII on June 22, 2010, 06:06:27 am
Wonderfully uneventful summer. Hauled some stuff, made some steel, hacked a few zombies apart to retrieve some things from the surface. The well is active and the farmland muddied, but I haven't built farms or stills as we still have 612 drink and another 561 plants. There are still some dwarves sleeping in the hospital and we don't have much of an export industry because I don't want to distract the haulers who are still carting stuff down.
Engraved on the wall is an image of 'Krimson II' Drilledchanneled the dwarf. 'Krimson II' Drilledchanneled is engraving. The artwork relates to the creation of the masterful engraving The Prophesy of Watches by the dwarf 'Krimson II' Drilledchanneled in Battlefailed in the early autumn of 507.
Construction of my personal quarters is coming along at a steady pace. I have a team of engravers who have been going at it for some months now, the best of whom are Krimson II and a lady dwarf named Cog Racksects who have produced a handful of masterful and plenty of exceptional pieces between them.
Engraved on the wall is an image of Zasit Zulbanokol the kitten. The kitten is falling. The artwork relates to the passing of the kitten Zasit Zulbanokol in Battlefailed in the late autumn of 507.
I was doing a brief dry-run test of the defense system before the reservior filled to make sure the mechanisms had hooked up properly. The moment the lever was pulled, somebodies pet kitten stepped onto the bridge.
I read somewhere that if a cat falls more than 11 stories, it instinctively flares its legs out to increase air resistance. This slows it down enough to stick the landing with relatively minor injuries. In Dwarf Fortress, apparently, cats don't do that.
Engraved on the wall is an image of 'Melkorp' Goldthunder the dwarf and Asno Ongnongom the goblin. Asno Ongnongom is shooting 'Melkorp' Goldthunder. The artwork relates to the killing of the dwarf 'Melkorp' Goldthunder by the goblin Asno Ongnongom in Battlefailed in the late autumn of 507.
An ambush popped up while a mason was out collecting something from a dead caravan. The bowgoblins let lose a hail of arrows at him, he didn't stand a chance. He was due to oversee the fort in a few months, too. Oh well.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Soldiers charged up the stairs to meet the ambush party head-on. First on the scene was none other than Kikrost the Iron Vanguard fresh out of hospital, who charged in alone and beat the macegoblin squad leader into the ground.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Meanwhile the caravan appeared on the horizon, only to run into another three goblin ambush squads. The guards ran straight into the fray.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
By the time the locals had finished up the first squad and advanced to the surface, the caravan guards had all but annhilated the goblins. The militia did a quick clean-up of a few skeletal rhesus macaques that were nipping at the heels of the merchant donkeys and everyone came inside for drinks.
Post by: Oglokoog on June 22, 2010, 06:57:39 pm
Post by: melkorp on June 23, 2010, 09:33:20 pm
Post by: TurkeyXIII on June 24, 2010, 01:24:20 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
A couple of skelks were hanging around the edge of the cliff spooking haulers who were trying to retrieve stuff from a dead caravan. Unworried, I sent up the main squad to put an end to the problem. Our resident Iron Vanguard arrived and started hacking them in half one by one - and then promptly dodged into the ocean. RIP Kikrost, you will be sorely missed. But not by the dwarves. They're too busy admiring the trade depot.
Engraved on the wall is an image of Athel Sabrepunched the Shameful Road of Smiths the dwarf and Bax Blackhobbled the goblin. Athel Sabrepunched the Shameful Road of Smiths is striking down Bax Blackhobbled. The artwork relates to the killing of the goblin Bax Blackhobbled by the dwarf Athel Sabrepunched the Shameful Road of Smiths in Battlefailed in the late winter of 507.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I wasn't expecting goblins in a season without a trade caravan to beat up, but I already had soldiers near the surface from the de-elking exercise mentioned above. Willing to take advantage of the fact the bowgoblins elected to shoot nearby zombie muskoxen instead, I gave the order to charge. All but two soldiers ran inside to grab provisions.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Thanks largely to the new steel mail armor, they held their own until the militia commander arrived. Two more ambush squads appeared to the south, but they were kept busy with more of the local wildlife.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Undead rhesus macaques jumped into the fray, but a quick battle allowed our soldiers to charge south to the remaining goblins.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Victory, and only a few minor injuries.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Finally it's time to leave. Most of my projects for the year ended ahead of schedule, so the haulers spent the last few months rearranging furniture. I'll upload in a few mins when I figure out how to use the upload site...
...and done. File is here: http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=2574
I've been using 31.08 so you'll probably need that version or later to load it.
Note for the next overseer:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: Zathel on June 24, 2010, 07:58:26 am
Post by: melkorp on June 24, 2010, 08:27:00 am
Post by: Robocorn on June 24, 2010, 06:12:05 pm
Post by: TurkeyXIII on June 24, 2010, 11:06:36 pm
Post by: melkorp on June 25, 2010, 01:06:09 am
Now, some dwarves might tell you Melkorp's a few pieces short of a puzzlebox, or a little slow, but I've always felt right at home in Battlefailed.
Until now. Today, something's...off.
Hey, what am I doing out here past the gate anyway?
(http://i764.photobucket.com/albums/xx290/melkorp/depot.jpg)
Ash, bones, junk, blood. Nothing wrong here! Well: more severed monkey hands than usual, but.
(http://i764.photobucket.com/albums/xx290/melkorp/pillars.jpg)
All these pillars I never got around to engraving. Hmm. Wait, where is everybody? Creiyd? Kagus?
(http://i764.photobucket.com/albums/xx290/melkorp/Overseerroom.jpg)
The Overseer's room, it's been ransacked or something...empty. Coffins lining the Deep Road.
At the second turning I stop, compelled to move towards a shale casket...
Something about it...reach out to lift the lid
(http://i764.photobucket.com/albums/xx290/melkorp/Melkorp2-1.jpg)
All of a sudden I don't feel so good
(http://i764.photobucket.com/albums/xx290/melkorp/Melkorpskeleton.jpg)
Hmm. I guess that explains all these.
(Twangs a ghostly goblin arrow embedded in ghostly neck, thinks)
How do I feel about this?
(http://i764.photobucket.com/albums/xx290/melkorp/Melkorp.jpg)
Post by: TurkeyXIII on June 25, 2010, 10:59:00 am
Engraved on the wall is an image of 'Melon' Letterseized the dwarf and dwarves. The dwarves are refusing 'Melon' Letterseized. 'Melon' Letterseized looks dejected. The artwork relates to the removal of the dwarf 'Melon' Letterseized the dwarf from the position of chief medical dwarf of the Oar of Ankles in the early spring of 507.
I had some rearranging to do, as Melon was our best weaponsmith. He was replaced by a dwarf named Goden Flagthrowers who posessed some suturing skill. Oglokoog SnarledFenced was taken off mining for a similar reason, to become an armorer. I also condensed the militia into one squad for simplicity, led by Samrist (I think).
Engraved on the wall is an image of 'Krimson II' Drilledchanneled the dwarf. 'Krimson II' Drilledchanneled is engraving. The artwork relates to the creation of the masterful engraving The Prophesy of Watches by the dwarf 'Krimson II' Drilledchanneled in Battlefailed in the early autumn of 507.
Construction of my personal quarters is coming along at a steady pace. I have a team of engravers who have been going at it for some months now, the best of whom are Krimson II and a lady dwarf named Cog Racksects who have produced a handful of masterful and plenty of exceptional pieces between them.
Engraved on the wall is an image of Zasit Zulbanokol the kitten. The kitten is falling. The artwork relates to the passing of the kitten Zasit Zulbanokol in Battlefailed in the late autumn of 507.
I was doing a brief dry-run test of the defense system before the reservior filled to make sure the mechanisms had hooked up properly. The moment the lever was pulled, somebodies pet kitten stepped onto the bridge.
I read somewhere that if a cat falls more than 11 stories, it instinctively flares its legs out to increase air resistance. This slows it down enough to stick the landing with relatively minor injuries. In Dwarf Fortress, apparently, cats don't do that.
Post by: Robocorn on June 26, 2010, 11:55:39 am
I read somewhere that if a cat falls more than 11 stories, it instinctively flares its legs out to increase air resistance. This slows it down enough to stick the landing with relatively minor injuries. In Dwarf Fortress, apparently, cats don't do that.
I'm going to quote this.
Post by: SethCreiyd on June 27, 2010, 03:48:26 pm
Post by: Andreus on June 27, 2010, 10:30:28 pm
I'm now weeping tears of mirth.
I love you guys so much.
Post by: mathlc on June 29, 2010, 09:45:09 am
Post by: melkorp on July 01, 2010, 07:25:58 pm
Emergency Quorum, Mayor Ringfell's office
508, 1 Granite
In attendance:
Ral Athelurus, Mayor
'Samrist' Dimplechannels, Militia (Cmndr)
'Creiyd' Clearlanterns, Manager
Goden Flagthrowers, Chief Medical
'Atreku' Airtraded, Arsenal
'Zathel' Mindfulgold, Bookkeeping
Permanent Barracks designated for the following squads:
Earthen Scholars, Athel Astnonub Mostodtulon Eshtan (Cptn)
Earthen Gloves, 'Samrist' Dimplechannels (Cmndr)
Motion to reinstate Overseer 'Turkey XIII' carried (unanimous)
(http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4095/4750693822_4d7f5840c6_b.jpg)
The Diary of Turkey XIII Pulledportal
508, 2 Granite
It's official: I'm to Oversee the fortress for the year 508 in the stead of the genial but unlucky Melkorp Goldthunder. Wonderful. I think a few more gem windows for the Quarters are in orddddddd----(illegible)
I live.
Thanks for the loan, Turkey: I promise to take good care of this body.
TO DO:
Dismantle all Upper Battlefailed levers
Kill Kittens
Military training: now individual discretion
The whole of the original first level is now a refuse pile. Our overtaxed butcher's shop is finally uncluttered, and more are being built. If Battlefailed has an inexhaustable resource, it is bones.
The Spring is mild. In dismantling the old levers, I only managed to inadvertantly flood two, three rooms at most before our masons could react. Forgotten beasts roam the caverns, vainly seeking a way in. The legendary hoard increases. Our steel-clad soldiers grow ever stronger. By the stone, 508 will be a bbbbbbbbb-- (illegible)
Post by: TurkeyXIII on July 01, 2010, 10:04:55 pm
Thanks for the loan, Turkey: I promise to take good care of this body.Better care than your other one I hope :P
Post by: Robocorn on July 01, 2010, 11:54:10 pm
next you'll be telling me that they're using weapons and not getting their asses handed to them by elk.
You'd better treasure that upper level. Krimson worked hard to dig that out while I sat on my ass and threw tantrums in bed.
EDIT: I really like the diagram. is it to scale?
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 02, 2010, 08:37:48 am
Post by: mathlc on July 02, 2010, 12:21:49 pm
but, i can't play my turn.too busy with some other things
Post by: Dante on July 02, 2010, 06:43:49 pm
Post by: melkorp on July 03, 2010, 06:33:18 am
The spring was peaceful, productive. Why couldn't I remember any of it? This latest batch of whip wine must be getting the better of me, I thought: I'd suddenly find myself in odd corners of Upper Battlefailed, no idea how I got there. Robocorn stopped me to say how much he liked the new Battlefailed maps that hang in the corridors... but who hung them? I thought to confide in my diary, strange new entries in a hand not my own...is it possible? If I am possessed, where is my arftifact? Does -- oh no not aggggggggggg
(illegible)
Summer, Overseer Melkorp reporting.
Well, everyone's getting a bed and a cabinet. I caused, or rather Turkey and I caused a smallish wall to be erected around the original entrance, just a modest zombie-free slice of the surface to call our own. But that's not what I want to tell you.
(http://i764.photobucket.com/albums/xx290/melkorp/seige.jpg)
A score of macemen and their captain, bow drawn, riding a fell beast. It seems I'm to have the unique pleasure of avenging my own death. The Earthen Scholars and Earthen Gloves are quickly sent to the entrance, with it's six new cage traps. The plan being: let the cage traps fall on 3 to 6 of them, then the counterattack. While the goblins clear the field of zombie horses, an unlucky kobold thief is quickly dealt with, and then all is ready.
The goblins decisively advance. Zefon Whippuzzles enters a martial trance, breaks ranks, and charges straight for the Goblin Chief on his Rutherer. Sigh. Well, when in Battlefailed, as the adage goes. Both squads charge. Bolts and silver maces alike bounce harmlessly off of shining dwarven steel. Goblin limbs arc through the air. Beautiful. Only their mounted leader escapes alive.
You know what they say about the optimal temperature of vengeance? Absolutely true. Another pair of kobold thieves are anticlimactically dispatched.
Sigun Hamerack, Ingish Letterseared, and squad leader Athel kill a kobold each. Krimson II gets one, and Zefon Whippuzzles decapitates two goblins and earns the name the Clear Craft of Beaks. But the battle goes to Rakust Battlearrows, with 8 goblins slain (they're calling him the Creepy Omen of Thunder, excellent).
Ingish Letterseared broke an elbow, leg, and a couple of ribs and had to be carried down by Zathel, but Doc Goden is with him now. I imagine he'll wear both gauntlets into battle next time. In celebration I have arrrrrrrrrrr
(illegible)
http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=52116.msg1371564#msg1371564 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=52116.msg1371564#msg1371564)
Post by: melkorp on July 03, 2010, 07:37:17 am
Post by: TurkeyXIII on July 03, 2010, 09:40:27 am
Post by: Oglokoog on July 04, 2010, 05:52:46 am
Post by: Samthere on July 05, 2010, 05:07:40 am
I probably won't be able to do my turn when it comes up, so please STRIKE MY NAME DOWN from the list for the time being. <3
Post by: Zathel on July 08, 2010, 02:35:13 am
Post by: Truean on July 08, 2010, 11:42:00 am
Quote
Anyone alive here?
"No. Er, I mean.... You're imagining voices...." :P
Post by: Robocorn on July 09, 2010, 12:15:55 am
Battlefailed will not die, not while I'm around anyway
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 09, 2010, 02:56:04 am
Post by: Pisano on July 09, 2010, 01:07:57 pm
Pisano
Post by: Robocorn on July 10, 2010, 12:18:35 am
Can I get added to the list?Totally
Pisano
Post by: melkorp on July 10, 2010, 04:18:41 pm
Post by: melkorp on July 10, 2010, 07:29:01 pm
The Diary of Turkey XIII
(no date)
"Keep it up, Turkey!" "Great Summer, Turkey!" I smile, keep moving, head down. Can't let them see my eyes...
I never know when it will happen, or how long it will last. The last time oh no you gotta be 'Mokkkkkkkkk
(illegible)
--tinued survival of our... oh no. Where?
This must be Battlefailed: at least that certainly looks like my friend Moldath Paddleflag being gored by a skorse on the refuse pile. The Scholars arrive too late to save him. The first death on my watch. How long have I been away?
1 Galena
After almost two months of surgery, Ingish, our only casualty from the last siege, is back on his feet in the barracks, training at his own pace. Glad of a good outcome. By the stone, I am happy to be back on this plane of existence, endless zombie beast wars or no. Cavebrands is more stressful somehow, being at a much more crucial point in it's history. Battlefailed has ever lived as if on the point of a knife, but in 508, it is as if the balance has gently, decisively tipped towards survival.
Postscript: Ingish, visibly pale, succumbed to infection, despite 9 courses of suturing, despite 9 separate dressings.
21 galena
The humans, slow to trade, were predictably ambushed. Athel Crafteddragons died resetting a cage trap. Stupid cage traps, I was a fool for erecting them, when the goal is to keep dwarves off the surface. That's 3 dead on my watch. Which, for a population of 88, is probably the safest 9 months in Battlefailed history.
We'll never be free of these 'Mok-damned zombies till somebody forbids each and every item on the surface. But who's got tttttttttttt--
(illegible) kkkkking kidding me.
Oh the bastard's done it again
(illegible)
http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=52116.msg1390059#msg1390059 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=52116.msg1390059#msg1390059)
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 10, 2010, 08:06:09 pm
Post by: Andreus on July 10, 2010, 11:01:24 pm
Post by: melkorp on July 11, 2010, 01:53:45 am
Diary of Turkey XIII
Hmm. Turkey's hands shake when I reach for the diary. Good thing this is my last season.
22nd Timber
The Queen's caravan arrived on schedule, and was punctually attacked by skorses. I have a point south of the entrance I've named point 19, and I send the Earthen Gloves and the Earthen Scholars there. It suffices to get the caravan safely inside. Our reputation as the Merchant's Graveyard is surely dire enough.
19th Moonstone
Limul Paddledblocks went mad, I've no idea why. Stands there weeping. I'll set a coffin aside for her.
4th Opal
Decimated more skorse herds for practice. Rakust the Creepy Omens of Thunder is now an Axe Lord, despite some nasty wounds that don't seem to be receiving attention. Health care is slipping, a peasant just died of infection.
15th Obsidian
What's that rumbling?
UTU REMZU, BATTLEFAILED, 508
10 goblin swordsmen and a swordmaster. 9 goblin bowmen and a master lasher, all mounted on rutherers, jabberers, and Giant Olms. Plus 7 trolls. They waste their advantage killing the local skoxes, while all squads are sent to wait below the few cage and weapons traps. The Troll shock troops are slaughtered, and the Earthen Gloves join the Earthen Scholars in a counterattack, hacking the bowmen's mounts out from under them and running them down in the field.
(http://i764.photobucket.com/albums/xx290/melkorp/carnage.jpg)
The carnage is indescribable. Most of the blood in this picture belongs to Lokum Stockadesyrups, sadly.
Dwarven Casualties: Lokum Stockadesyrups, bled out from a silver arrow in the hand
Goblin casualties: 20 Goblins, 6 Trolls, Numerous Jabberers, Rutherers, and Giant Olms.
Prisoners: 1 goblin swordmaster, 1 goblin swordsman, 2 jabberers, 2 trolls
A tired feeling. My spirit is fading. Someone is coming to bury Lokum.
Turkey, I've had a chair built out of microcline for you to relax in, right there on the beach: you'll probably, um, want to use it. You can sit with your back to the ashy charnel plain and watch the gentle, blue, malodorous waves roll in. The slate chair next to it, stained blue with troll's blood? That's for me. Beyond the velvet lies, there lies a truth of steel, the vision never dies, life's a never ending wheel... who said that?
Post by: Robocorn on July 11, 2010, 03:18:09 am
Post by: melkorp on July 11, 2010, 09:22:24 am
Abjectly sorry for the long delays, I realize it saps the energy out of the game, and this is a great game.
Battlefailed is in the best shape of its life, I honestly didn't have to do a whole lot, which is good since this was my first succession game. I feel like writing some Threetoe-esque stuff about leaping tigers and rockets and dragons, but let's just say the future is bright for BFailed.
Should brew some booze, though, cause I stopped.
Oh, Krimson II is an Axe Lord. The Earthen Gloves are getting tougher every day.
I think the official song of Battlefailed is now Holy Diver. Just putting that out there. Thanks y'all.
POSTSCRIPT
Oh, and fleeing the surface totally worked, if somebody with an infinite amount of patience can manage to forbid EVERY LAST ITEM on the surface, we can finally stop fighting the zombie beast war and instead use them as our first line of defense, a role they're well suited for (gives soldiers time for careful stationing).
Post by: Robocorn on July 11, 2010, 09:40:31 am
We still have a ways to go though.
Post by: Andreus on July 11, 2010, 10:12:34 am
How... HOW COULD YOU MAKE BATTLEFAILED PLEASANT?! :'(
Post by: melkorp on July 11, 2010, 10:27:25 am
Post by: Robocorn on July 11, 2010, 10:56:59 am
How could you?!
How... HOW COULD YOU MAKE BATTLEFAILED PLEASANT?! :'(
It's your job to make it Battlefailed again Andreus. Be irresponsible and waste materials on unimportant things involving magma and monuments that don't make sense. And if even your finest tomfoolery cannot wrong what is right, I'll have to do it myself like I did with Sparkgear 11
Post by: Andreus on July 11, 2010, 11:05:52 am
Post by: Robocorn on July 11, 2010, 11:08:21 am
I shall not fail the fortress that I named. Loading up the save - 31.08 with Mayday tileset's OK, right?If it don't break the save it's fine with me.
Post by: Andreus on July 11, 2010, 12:29:35 pm
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/1.png)
It has become clear to me that the problems with Battlefailed, both practical and philosophical, are indicative not of a flaw in specific dwarves but of flaws in the dwarven condition itself. It has become apparent that the old answers to tyranny and poverty are inadequate. I've required several years to contemplate this problem effectively. The checks and balances of dwarven society were created because they realise how unfit they are to govern themselves, but the intrinsic flaws of the individual are reflected in the societies they create. Thusly, any society that dwarves create will be by definition tainted by the flaws in dwarven nature.
The solution, then, is not to invent a better society, but to address the flaws in dwarven nature itself.
I will create the world's first postdwarven society, here in Battlefailed, and those who dwell in this fortress shall become the first citizens.
Post by: Oglokoog on July 11, 2010, 01:02:15 pm
Post by: melkorp on July 11, 2010, 01:15:36 pm
Post by: Andreus on July 11, 2010, 02:06:01 pm
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/4.png)
I have appropriated the overseer's quarters. I considerations that must be made to allow the formation of a new civilization will need to be made in considerable comfort. I feel no shame or hypocricy in this for when history vindicates my ideas and the new world order shines out across the realm, there will be no-one left with the need to quibble over a few creature comforts, for we will be beyond want and need.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/2.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/3.png)
Heck, if I can even make this place worthy to live in, they'll hail me as a genius.
It's clear that in the gap between my tenures as overseer we've had nothing but brain-dead swillheads and self-serving, arrogant pompous fools with no concern for anything but their own agenda. Thusly, it will be neccessary to remove the symbols of their reign as swiftly as possible. I was delighted to find that the gem window that was shamelessly stolen from my old sanctum before its mystical energies were ruined by the placement of a large number of corpses inside of it is now in the overseer's quarters, giving me a truly amazing view of the cavern below.
My first major project will be to flood the cave lake with magma and turn it into obsidian. Because that's what postdwarvenists do. We flood things.
With magma.
But in an entirely postdwarven manner.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 11, 2010, 02:07:52 pm
And great job melkorp, glad you popped up before it was too late.
Post by: Andreus on July 11, 2010, 02:36:04 pm
Two important arrivals and one important consideration have occured.
The first important arrival: dwarven migrants.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/5.png)
The second important arrival: a vile force of darkness.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/6.png)
The important consideration: I have absolutely no idea which lever to pull to seal the fortress.
IMPORTANT POSTSCRIPT: By an abnormally large blessing of good fortune, the elves arrived at the same time as the goblins, and are currently serving as a distraction.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/7.png)
Post by: Robocorn on July 11, 2010, 02:42:16 pm
Post by: Andreus on July 11, 2010, 02:53:11 pm
We slaughter them by the thousands.
But... you know, we do it ironically.
Post by: Andreus on July 11, 2010, 03:02:25 pm
The goblin siege has been utterly destroyed - a few have been taken prisoner and will await my consideration of some suitable example of postdwarvenist punishment. I estimate between ten and fifteen dwarves fell in the assault - including Rakust Battlearrows the Creepy Omen of Thunder, Axelord - tragic victims of the unenlightened savagery of the goblin hordes. On a lighter note, the magma pump project that will flood the cave with obsidian nears completion.
8th Hematite, 509
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/11.png)
GLRBLLLLRBLLLL!
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/12.png)
GRLBRBRLRBLL - IT'S PERFECTLY FINE TO EXPORT NATIVE GOLD ITEMS AGAIN - HGGRRGKKGGLLghkkgblrblbll... brll... bllll...
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/13.png)
Post by: Zathel on July 11, 2010, 03:29:00 pm
And what's with that shot of workshop floor? Are you implying something? You dare say something about superior workspace, constructed according to all proper regulations concerning work safety and efficiency streamlining?
Also, I have this impression that Battlefailed was really aptly named. We win battles, but our champions fail (at life) during them.
Post by: Andreus on July 11, 2010, 03:30:08 pm
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/14.png)
*corny and unneccessary crack of thunder*
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/15.png)
My, it certainly was fortuitous (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Ptitlexn9xzsjd5fif?from=Main.ChekhovsGun) that I made preparations for recorporealisation back on page 12 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1264656#msg1264656), wasn't it?
Post by: Robocorn on July 11, 2010, 03:36:02 pm
Post by: Andreus on July 11, 2010, 04:25:26 pm
The magma pump is complete! Now we can live the postdwarvenist dream of... lava! And water!
Yes.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/16.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/17.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/18.png)
I'm not entirely sure how exactly this relates to the postdwarvenist ideal of curing elements of the dwarven condition... but it sure looks cool.
12th Malachite, 509
Actually, on reflection, it seems to be an intrinsic flaw in the dwarven condition that we regularly perform dangerous, illogical and entirely unneccessary things without really knowing why. Why do dwarven miners sometimes decide to hack through thin pillars of rock supporting entire cave ceilings? Why will some dwarves knowingly wall themselves into large constructions, dooming themselves to death from starvation or thirst? Why do dwarves sometimes run out to collect trinkets and clothes from warriors fallen in battle with elite goblins? Why do dwarves mine adamantium when they know what lies beneath it? When the legendary
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I meander into baseless speculation here, but it seems to me as if all dwarves are driven by some force that we are unable to resist, yet cannot quite understand or put our finger on. If, truly, that is so, then escaping beyond this force is surely the only way in which a postdwarven society could possibly flourish?
8th Galena, 509
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/19.png)
We've just had another possession. But what if it is in fact, us that are possessed?
17th Galena, 509
The mysterious construction is underway - but what mysterious construction has been wrought with our own hands?
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/20.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/21.png)
Post by: Samthere on July 11, 2010, 05:01:31 pm
Also
what...is... "mass designation"...? I feel a face palm coming on...{d}{b} - you can [un]forbid/[un]dump/[un]melt a whole region of items at once, the same way you might designate a square for digging.
Post by: Andreus on July 11, 2010, 07:58:35 pm
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/22.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/23.png)
This scepter - is it a symbol of the grandeur of our civilization, or a reminder to us of all its flaws?
Oh, and we had another goblin siege and half our militia was killed, so I drafted 8 additional dwarves to fill out the ranks. Hopefully they'll become at least marginally proficient before the next problem shows up.
That leads me to more musing about what exactly possessed anyone to think that setting up in this sand-blasted, zombie-infested hellhole was a good idea. Why did we do it? What force compelled us to make such an ill-advised decision when there were places far more abundant with resources and less abundant with zombies and goblins. Why did we not go somewhere the goblins could not reach?
26th Galena, 509
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/24.png)
In improving the magma delivery system such that more of the lake can be solidified, it seems we have accidentally channelled magma down an abandoned tunnel that seemed to be some sort of drainage system that emptied into the magma lake beneath the forges. Horrific screams were heard from down there - I'm not entirely sure what the heck they're coming from.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 11, 2010, 09:10:12 pm
* * *
Diary of task manager Creiyd Edusil, Excerpts
-----
The completion of the magma plumbing was recieved with much joy, too rare a resource in these troubled days. Between the barbarian goblins and the monsters of bone, we've seen too many dwarves die too soon.
And there is something strange is going on here. Several dwarves are complaining about lapses of memory, fainting spells, or actions made without understanding what or why at the time.
I fear either the inherent evil of the land has begun to subjugate our minds, or the abhorrent state of Lur's Temple has angered His Feminence and invoked a curse against us. I must persuade the overseer to do something before it's too late.
Post by: Andreus on July 11, 2010, 09:22:01 pm
A dwarf - a former overseer, I believe - came up to me today and asked me to consider Lur's temple.
I don't even know where it is.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 12, 2010, 12:28:04 am
11th Opal, 509
-----
When Battlefailed is struck by the gods and the rescue party finds this text, know that it wasn't my fault.
(OOC: Horrifying screams? Oh %&$*.)
Post by: melkorp on July 12, 2010, 07:46:30 am
what...is... "mass designation"...? I feel a face palm coming on...{d}{b} - you can [un]forbid/[un]dump/[un]melt a whole region of items at once, the same way you might designate a square for digging.
(Palm to face)
Thank you.
Post by: Andreus on July 12, 2010, 10:04:16 am
However, just before my turn ended, this happened:
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/25.png)
So you'll have something to look forward to.
I'd say we lost about twenty dwarves this year but the migrants kept arriving, so the population of our fair monstrosity has actually risen - I started with 88 and I think we were sitting somewhere around 105 when I saved.
Save here (http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/Battlefield510.zip).
Post by: Robocorn on July 12, 2010, 10:55:38 am
I can't decide whether or not I want to do that Fenetic Aksent thing.
Post by: Zathel on July 12, 2010, 11:33:04 am
Post by: Robocorn on July 12, 2010, 05:18:50 pm
Diary of Robocorn, Recollections of postmortem
A lot of stuff happened in hell, I wrestled with a three eyed moose with purple feathers that spat poison, I got to find out what bone meal tastes like (a bit dry really but not entirely offensive), I suffered pain in places that I didn't even have when I was alive, and I learned that the management of hell were a bunch of malignant fiends (not that I hadn't suspected it before). Apparently having found I had not suffered enough in his chamber of corrupt intentions (I did kinkier stuff when I was alive) the head ass demon decided it would be really funny to send me BACK to Battlefailed, the place where they broke both my legs, starved me, and strangled me to death. Before I had any say in the matter the bastards astral kicked my ass back out into the windy world.(http://img690.imageshack.us/img690/3710/39363546.png)
As I phased through the ether I saw the blasted place, I hoped with my heart that nobody was there and I could leave. It looked like an invasion had been going on, maybe everyone was dead and I could go back to hell
(http://img534.imageshack.us/img534/3008/77282053.png)
The halls I floated through were bare and filled with rubble and old furniture. Everyone must have died in a goblin invasion. I bet Led is real pround of herself having sent all o me fellow dwarves to their doom.
(http://img88.imageshack.us/img88/1630/96102524.png)
There were tunnels going for miles under the rock I was just about to leave when I hear a sound. A sound of merriment.
(http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/7779/98203395.png)
What in the buttery devil is this?
A dwarven utopia, like Led had promised. A place where we didn't have to put up with any humans and their high ceilings or any of those Ngerxungs or emxas that Led made us recite. It was beautiful.
Until I remembered what the bastards did to me when I was alive. Those sons of bitches were going to pay!
There were many hosts I'd seen throughout this new Battlefailed, one even had been called Robocorn II which seeed more like an insult she was trying to throw off than any real nickname. I decided to start fresh with a little dwarven boy, nobody would notice if he got a little more spunk.
(http://img248.imageshack.us/img248/3857/85801715.png)
I'd show those bastards what for, there'll be no celebrating while I'm back, and I intend to live a full life now.
Post by: Robocorn on July 14, 2010, 11:40:38 pm
Diary of Robocorn Passgears, Plan of ultimate Dwarfhood
In the days of old we dwarves have had a great tradition of hosing our enemies down until they die. Be it water or magma, my forebearers have done well with this formula. I will however do one better.
(http://img534.imageshack.us/img534/8703/61838183.png)
A sea, a great underground reservoir of toxic slime left by some reeking abomination that climbed outta hell to make
sure I was having fun. When I saw this horrifying mire of bodily fluid, I new I must delve to employ it for my own benefit. A dangerous task, but if I was interested in saving lives I wouldn't have made the plan in the first place.
(http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/2472/71809265.png)
I'm beginning to see the folly of choosing the body of a child. The only people who listen to you are idiots. here they are wandering around out in the skelk infested wilds with no equipment just asking to be slaughtered outright. The bastards have yet t' learn a thing from living in Battlefailed. Even after I tell 'em not to bother with the damn discarded bolts they refuse to go in because something has spooked them.
Skelks.
I send out a legendary axedwarf to take out the skelks as well as the other parties.
(http://img155.imageshack.us/img155/4707/92959123.png)
It does not go as planned, though I feel it is a little cathartic to see the successor of the dwarf that strangled me to
death being beaten by skelks. Maybe if he lives I can drop him in to the toxic sea to fight the demon turtle.
(http://img3.imageshack.us/img3/4897/44291980.png)
Much to my amusement, Krimson 2 is joined by a swordsman with a broken arm and a recruit. Really guys, where did
all these dead goblins come from? were they on sale?
Eventually the recruit manages to take down the skelks with his bare hands and leaves the two pathetic crippled soldiers to rot on the beach, class act, class act.
In a totally unrelated measure, a previously enamored dwarf who had been working on some project in the workshop
finally showed his finished product.
(http://img8.imageshack.us/img8/343/50234794.png)
Well at least I won't be getting a bad back.
The first casualty of my reign is a legendary miner, I'd never heard of him so he can't be that great, he fell to his doom in the sea to nobody's surprise. I just wish he'd lived long enough to let me know what kind of pain the secretion has.
I'm itchin' to find that out.
(http://img641.imageshack.us/img641/5866/79549475.png)
Our second casualty in the construction was another miner , the poor fella was coated in the slime but didn't show any abnormal signs. He must've been too busy drowning to help with the important task of diagnosing poisons.
(http://img30.imageshack.us/img30/7053/99670292.png)
It dinnae matter anyway, we've got plenty of dwarves, an' you'll find soon enough that I'm not picky about me workers,
If ye got arms an legs y' can milk a camel, design a screw pump, an dig through twent metric tonnes o' rock, an th'
absence of which does nae disqualify yah from doing these things either
(http://img190.imageshack.us/img190/3954/95842796.png)
It was barely a month before I got my first batch of goblin visitors, It's a shame the part favors aren't ready yet. I
greeted the greenskins the way the queen always greeted us dwarves, with a traditional goblin welcome of "Osat garu-
slömod! Reko-ruspkes. ugsmez-źl emxasnuz!" I then let out a hearty laugh like Led always did after the greeting, hoping
they would just go away. For some reason it made them come at us faster. Maybe, I put the wrong inflections on it.
(http://img243.imageshack.us/img243/3733/56128380.png)
I begin my victory over the goblin horde by bringing everyone inside, (including a bunch o elves that happened to be in
the area), unfortunately somebody put all of the levers, all the same color in the same room. When I find out what wise guy did this I'm going to have them keelhauled.
(http://img17.imageshack.us/img17/3482/63807647.png[img]not only did this possibly let in the goblin horde we were fending off but more importantly, it spent a perfectly good drowning trap and sealed off the trade route, now we have no drowning trap AND we're stuck with elves until I can figure out how I set it off.[img]http://img64.imageshack.us/img64/7700/24616275.png)
It is at this time that I learn that NONE of the levers in the lever room control the drawbridge and that the designers of the fort for the last nine years have long awaited their chance to fuck with me.
(http://img695.imageshack.us/img695/8242/82612284.png)
The obvious solution is to throw soldiers at them.
This of course fails, and much of the idiot surface dwellers die. Meanwhile we're enjoying a bit of wet weather
underground due to the DAMN DROWNING TRAP. I've isolated the lever that caused it but nobody's prepared to
pull the damn thing. I can see why I was sent back here.
(http://img269.imageshack.us/img269/4232/34301762.png)
I'll give this to the elves, they've got some pretty big balls. I make the most of their ridiculous ballsiness by unloading all
of our crappy stone projects that I made the peons do to get rid of stone and badly damaged clothing. The bastards
clearly can't tell the difference between a good deal and an employment as garbagemen.
Naturally, as with all my good plans, it falls flat on its face the elves refuse to accept my gifts, cheeky bastards, I'd sleep with their princess out of spite, I probably wouldn't even enjoy it I'd just do it to create a longlasting conflict with them so I could hose them down with fluid.
I hope Okolobok is comfy, cause I still have to wait out the unending flood trap that's drowning the entire fort.
Post by: TurkeyXIII on July 15, 2010, 01:08:38 am
I thought I put enough drainage on that thing. Unless something got in the way of the drawbridge and stopped it from opening... or maybe Andreus' magmatic experiments blocked the plumbing...
Or maybe it's just poorly designed. I never actually had time to test it with a full cistern.
Edit: Oh, I know what's happened. In pulling levers at random to find the gate control you've opened the fill valve and the plumbing access at the same time. Yeah, that would cause a flood.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 15, 2010, 03:34:08 am
On second thought, I say we let him die.
Post by: melkorp on July 15, 2010, 08:55:43 am
Post by: Robocorn on July 15, 2010, 09:43:20 am
Better not let Krimson 2 die. He's Cog's lover and they're both friends with a quarter of the fort.He died in his first encounter and has been rotting ever since.
On second thought, I say we let him die.
Thanks, Turkey. The only way this could be better is if Osman decided to sneak in through your poorly placed cistern access port.
Post by: Robocorn on July 15, 2010, 03:15:44 pm
Diary of Robocorn, Child leader
I think I may be losing a bit of myself to this body. I've acquired his likes and dislikes and have used my considerable charisma to dig us a room in a vein of silver, which I now love. The little guy hasn't disappointed in the hair department either and has enough friends to ensure his constant political influence. I'll have to do something in return for this little guy, though he may have to wait until puberty to enjoy it.In other news I've managed to close the maintenance shaft for the Fort Flooder and through a bit of fortuitous misconstruction, all of the water drained into Andreus's lava field from last year instead of killing us. What good fortune.
(http://img59.imageshack.us/img59/3134/41187957.png)
With much experimentation I managed to get all of the floodgates closed. Now all we have to do is periodically trim the fungal wood that will grow all over the trade route for years to come.
The elves left this month and brought to my attention that the goblins who arrived in slate were still here, beating on any dwarf dumb enough to be outside. and let me tell you, there were around twenty, camping outside in fear of the two goblins. It was utterly anticlimactic to see both goblins easily struck down by a lone macedwarf. Is there no limit to the shame I feel about this place.
(http://img443.imageshack.us/img443/3203/55850545.png)
As my room was beginning to be completed, I decided to do a favor for future generations and make a lever to control the front moat (which I had been told had no lever and was useless as a defense measure), to remove any issures regarding identification, I made it in the corner of a room, away from any other levers, out of ilmenite, of which there is only one mechanism, and surrounded it with orthoclase to remove any doubt that this was the lever that controlled the front drawbridge.
(http://img690.imageshack.us/img690/5308/99181096.png)
The rest of spring was comparably calm to the early spring, and summer came calmly too. I'm beginning to wish Led were here so she could see how well we've made out here, also because that bony old human would hate living in the dank underground with us. I've engineered a plan I hope can bring this into fruition as well as get rid of all the worthless rocks lying around. It's a simple plan, one that involves making thousands of rock mugs and giving them away for free. If giving away useless junk isn't the true meaning of wealth then I don't know what is.
It was just another summer afternoon while I was telling the damn architects to build screw pumps they'd crewed up on earlier when I got reports of something like a giant toad that breathes fire in the second cavern. This is clearly an opportunity to flaunt our military and eat lots of toad meat.
(http://img38.imageshack.us/img38/4681/74283992.png)
to cease the constant distractions caused by the undead wildlife, I put it upon myself to close the door, cutting us off from the outside world. I don't miss it at all.
I seem to be running into a problem lately, when I tell my followers to build a screw pump, they'll go to the site, set up the designs, bring all of the materials to the site, and then the mason who was contracted to build the pump will declare that it cannot be built and will remove the plans and leave the components to lie on the site. I have over fifty of the pumps to make and the gall of these dwarves is not helping any. They shouldn't have a say in whether or not it gets built. If I want a wall built between a hostile dragon and an erupting volcano, they better damn well burn to death building that wall or I'll have something worse prepared for them.
Speaking of which, I had decided to fortify the wall around our aboveground territory. Almost immediately, the masons decided that they would prefer not to do this project that justified their continued existence. The saw no reason to get off their lazy asses and work like they'd refused to work on the pump stack, as I was ready to prepare some exquisite revenge we got some guests.
(http://img571.imageshack.us/img571/379/74017306.png)
ensuring that my fortifications would not be built for some time.
Continuing with our theme of failure a human caravan shows up but refuses to do anything because our bridge is drawn, and will not be undrawn until our green friends leave. They show no signs of doing so as they've joined another ambush squad to have a tea party.
It was nearly a week until they gave up and went home. The humans brought many things and I'll see if I can't unload some of our useless stone on them. This season has been a constant disappointment and I dinnae think it has ever stopped raining for the last three months. The liason will be here next season and we'll see if we can't get someone swanky here to suffer with us.
(http://img203.imageshack.us/img203/9364/33784195.png)
Post by: Zathel on July 15, 2010, 03:55:02 pm
Also, do we even have any competent military dwarves left?
Post by: shibdib on July 15, 2010, 04:08:49 pm
Post by: TurkeyXIII on July 15, 2010, 11:55:53 pm
Wait, wait, what? Did I get that right? You flooded the spiral staircase? HOW?!... actually, I'm not sure if I want to know. Paving over the mud should help. Its what I did with reservoir pump stack, it seems to work.But then what would we do for logs? 8)
Nice drawings Robocorn.
Post by: Andreus on July 16, 2010, 12:42:12 am
Oh, and I'd like to voulenteer for the next open slot.
Post by: Robocorn on July 16, 2010, 04:58:02 pm
Diary of Robocorn, Child leader
This mornin' I tried to convince old Andreus 3 to do a masterful engraving of naked ladies over my bed. He refused, and when I said he could just do an exeptional engraving he stormed off, muttering something about post-dwarvenism and cosmic power. He should have more sympathy from me, I have to go through puberty TWICE.In less important news, the humans have finished their week long trek to our trade depot. If they have anything at all, I'll buy the heaviest stuff so they can carry the greatest amount of worthless stone crafts away.
(http://img708.imageshack.us/img708/1323/21476470.png)
Autumn's finally come, the rain will stop and those bastards from graspedseduce will come and see how prosperous their "Dwarven paradise" is. They'll give us their least favorite baron and I'll give them terrible rocks. But what if that isn't enough. I'll have to come up with something.
When I traded with the humans they were much more friendly than any of the humans in Graspedseduce they had plenty of stuff to justify selling off damaged clothing and rock crafts.
(http://img228.imageshack.us/img228/4371/31296007.png)
They are however, a bit lethargic with the leaving portion of trade, the part where they take the goods home or somewhere else entirely. Their lethargy troubles me.while it would be great if they just died, I gave them all of our throwaway stone goods and I really don't want more junk lying around this godforsaken dump.
The pump stack is doing terribly, It may take the entire year to finish it, regardless, the slime shooter will be completed, come hell or high water, which are both entirely plausible setbacks at this point.
On a lighter note, our tall garbagemen only took two months to get their sorry asses out of our hair and I don't miss them in the slightest. Tell your warlords we've got plenty more garbage where that came from!
(http://img686.imageshack.us/img686/378/39775197.png)
The blistering breakneck pace at which these screw pumps are being produced is staggering. Almost two, in a month? you masons and architects must be proud of yourselves. We seem to have one miner and she has a deathwish, I thought it might have been my doing that killed most of them off, but it seems they were really a suicidal lot. I can't blame them for coming to Battlefailed then if that was their mission, oughta speed up the process anyway.
It's not like we're running out of food, but we could use more. I've decided to create a whole new plot for plump helmets to help keep the bastards fed. It's boring but it needs to be done.
(http://img696.imageshack.us/img696/608/43953184.png)
The pump stack has been going well, the aboveground fortifications don't seem to have too many hangups and just because I can I'm putting together a litt- SHIT
(http://img143.imageshack.us/img143/2829/43836287.png)
no literally, a giant flying blob of stinking shit. if this thing gets in we're all dead. I can only rely on the caution employed by my predecessors to ward off flying enemies. AUUGH
Finally, the caravan has come from the mountainhomes. I'll unload our bone and rock goods (I've found bone is as abundant here as stone for obvious reasons) We just have to hope no goblins show up.
(http://img806.imageshack.us/img806/7186/19243012.png)
You've gotta have pity for those merchants, If I was a sniveling pissant from the cushy obsidian towers of graspedseduce I'd be scared shitless of this place allow me to unobscure our front gate
(http://img64.imageshack.us/img64/9774/40923801.png)
I'm resisting the urge to shout "Welcome to Fucking Battlefailed!" over the bloodstained walls of our carrion littered slice of hell. nonetheless, this is a great opportunity to bring all of our trashcrafts to the garbage-depot. Just in case you didn't know, if I never saw another piece of frigging gabbro again it would be too soon.
(http://img338.imageshack.us/img338/5280/63092217.png)
Unfortunately, the thought of crappy useless stone crafts draws in a goblin raiding party, maybe our "competant" "warriors" can dispatch them.
(http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/522/80798057.png)
If it surprises you at all, then you haven't been paying attention. But the goblins armed with whips manage to chew their way through our front lines until some real warriors show up. A digruntles band of goblins waits outside because I'm not stupid enough to open the door.
down in the fort I unload a ton of useless crap we collected from corpses and craftwork and had to buy all of his anvils to just get him to fit it all on the mules. The guy looked like he was about to hump my leg after we made the deals.
(http://img5.imageshack.us/img5/4274/89471699.png)
He keeps telling me that he has a schedule, but I find that if I open the front door to let Onol out, then he'll let in the asshole goblins who are currently loitering outside our walls. I'll have those battle hardened Battlefailed warriors go and kill them as I open the door.
On a lighter note some poor woodcrafter has become possessed and will likely produce something of little or no value.
(http://img801.imageshack.us/img801/2256/96166475.png)
Hooray
I was going to save this for later, but I made an arena for goblin/skeleton fighting but I'd like to show this image of dust coming from a collapsing piece of floor tiling knocking everyone on their asses.
(http://img28.imageshack.us/img28/457/46720364.png)
See you in winter.
Post by: Andreus on July 16, 2010, 05:16:07 pm
I noticed the OCEAN OF SLIME myself. I really want to know exactly how someone managed to get a frozen beast to release that much... extract. :-\
Post by: Robocorn on July 16, 2010, 05:23:59 pm
Well obviously I, a noted postdwarvenist philosopher, can't be expected to do something so iconic of the dwarven condition as draw something on a wall for your own selfish self-aggrandizement, can I?You did half of the engravings in my royal bedroom, mostly of titans.
I noticed the OCEAN OF SLIME myself. I really want to know exactly how someone managed to get a frozen beast to release that much... extract. :-\
It's a secretion, every time Osman touches a wet tile he leaves a pile of noxious goo.
He's been around apparently.
Diary of Robocorn, Prodigial master
The goblins are here and they won't stop being a bother, They greatly outnumber our warriors and I consider this a great time to throw our best soldiers at them and hope for the best.(http://img713.imageshack.us/img713/1581/12971013.png)
This proves verily effective, It seem that all of our effective strategy involves sending three dwarves named Čzum, Sigun, and Zon. Legendary Axedwarf, Hammerdwarf, and swordsdwarf respectively, demolshing dosens of goblins while the goblins beat the life out of craftsdwarves or masons. A fine strategy if I don't say so myself.
Is it just me or is every goblin named Stozu?
(http://img822.imageshack.us/img822/786/49385700.png)
Well, saves me having to learn their names when putting them in gladiatorial combat.
Speaking of which, in our gladiatorial arena that has yet to be finished one of our miners was caught in a freak accident and made gravity her bitch. We're currently working on plans to get her down.
(http://img517.imageshack.us/img517/6199/79025995.png)
In more disappointing news our possessed friend made for us a barrel, what is strange is that the barrel has an image of itself on it. A major problem with the possession of an amazingly ornate barrel is that I can't have it placed in my room for personal use.
(http://img413.imageshack.us/img413/8396/81255590.png)
Oh well. We've had no luck in lowering Melbil's body, a levitating corpse is a great ornament for a gladiatorial arena don't you think?
Well, The merchants are getting ready to leave and the liaison has yet to come. Those bastards aren't goign to follow protocol, they're going to leave us without proper representation, without proper law enforcement and without a proper philosopher, we can't make do with these posts-dwarvenist guys, they're awful, I want someone who thinks like me only moreso.
It seems as though my demeanor has rubbed off on the populace, they all walk around hunched over and grumbling about their dead idiot friends or their dead idiot dog who thought Stozu was a real friendly guy. The only problem with this is that other dwarves will not "nut up" and get on with their lives so I've come to the conclusion that I have to smooth and engrave everything to make them all feel better about their mediocrity. I'l let them throw parties and drink all the beer and be merry. I've had my legs broken enough times to know of dwarven instability.
(http://img138.imageshack.us/img138/1858/65462344.png)
A legendary miner that goes by the name of mathlc threw a tantrum today, and by threw a tantrum I mean he ripped an architect in fucking half. IN FUCKING HALF!
As an encore, he rips an arm and a leg off of a fisherdwarf.
(http://img571.imageshack.us/img571/4939/35263147.png)
Is it too early to sic the earthen gloves on this maniac?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
some other whacko with anger management issues manages to unfurrow an area of soil with the pure force of his rage.
(http://img708.imageshack.us/img708/5167/43874658.png)
In an entirely unrelated note, I'm ramping up coffin production and giving everyone snuggly warm beds where they can forget all their troubles.
The tantrums have been getting a little less frequent since I started making the new graves, and as a bonus I get to figure out who died on my watch, like Creiyd who must have contributed to this place while I was in hell, and cutiebard who thought this was a community fort a couple months ago.
(http://img210.imageshack.us/img210/4937/91452166.png)
well I've only got two months left to go and it seems like everything's been breaking down, but I'm sure it couldn't get
much worse than it is now. Wait' what's that?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
So after I lost my speechlessness, I decided to write down the situation at hand. There is a giant blob of filth spraying toxic gas all over the central area where all of our food is located and our best warriors are having little luck bringing it down.
(http://img411.imageshack.us/img411/1129/31075694.png)
This is all part of the experience.
After hours of beating the horrifying blob of stinking muck with their warhammers and crossbows, the beast finally collapsed into a filthy heap of putrid goo. The brave soul who took out the beast. Shem shipdusts will be given the title "shitslayer" because "Shem Shipdusts, Shit Slayer" is an amazingly fortuitous tongue twister
Funny enough that gas that Nomar kept farting out was harmless and caused "numbness" and minor nausea. It just goes to show that even the scariest monsters can be really pathetic when fought head on and that we shouldn't believe all of this lore about the deadly powers of the forgotten beasts and should fight ahead even when confronted with seemingly insurmountable odds because even in the hellwasted pit that is Battlefailed sometimes good fortune smiles upon us...
Just kidding. Anyone who got anywhere near Nomar died of critical lung failure
(http://img231.imageshack.us/img231/4298/56393095.png)
So now I've got my first Berserker. Some trapper guy who nobody will miss.
(http://img594.imageshack.us/img594/3812/46181171.png)
The guy is immediately set upon by the trained soldiers but refuses to die even when
(http://img85.imageshack.us/img85/2076/63714380.png)
Only a few weeks later a stonecrafter goes berserk. Guess I won't be getting any more +gabbro mug+s outta her. I scrambled the fortress defense force and they struck her down post haste. I think I might prefer hell to battlefailed after all. I wonder if Xubkib will take me back if I go back to hell.
I'm not proud of it, but we've run out of coffins. I've just been piling up the corpses in the rooms in upper battlefailed where we seldom dwell, I'm not looking forward to the ramifications of this, but I haven't got any other choice, all of my masons are out tantrumming
(http://img228.imageshack.us/img228/8968/89336021.png)
Today, a glassmaker went berserk and got in a fistfight with an unarmed recruit. The fight left lots of vomit around the upper levels of the fort. I haven't been able to finish nay of my projects this year. The slimeshooter is less than halfway done, though the pieces are there. The mechanics of the arena are not in place and I still haven't crenellated
the outer wall so it can serve as a platform for snipers. All of these have been balanced by halfway failures like killing Nomar or getting a royal bedroom that you can't sleep in because there's always a bum in it.
I'd like to enjoy my youth now. When the month is over I'll just let anyone else run this hellhole into the ground. They couldn't do as bad a job as me if they tried.
Oh, and the giant one-eyed fire-breathing toad of death got into the fort.
Seriously
(http://img137.imageshack.us/img137/215/73776850.png)
What the hell? Does the world hate me?
So I send out the earthen gloves and those other two squads who are around to make the earthen gloves look better. A wrestler engages Uker (the toad) and is immediately incinerated. Well, a least there's no tricks up this one's sleeve. I'm pretty sure I know what fire does.
(http://img251.imageshack.us/img251/8830/49932407.png)
Oh god I hope I don't know what fire does!
I didn't die of course. A tantrumming macedwarf drew the ire of the beast so I could get away. The macedwarf didn't last long as he was soon engulfed in fire. Our friend Uker then got a chance to show his love to the cripples in the hospital. After the hospital is reduced to a mess of blood and soot. Uker moves to the lower level dining hall where he pursues all except for the suicidal craftsdwarf. Really, you spare that one?
(http://img43.imageshack.us/img43/8366/69425985.png)
In a fit of awesome that makes the entirety of the victims of Uker look like pathetic miserable worms. A single swordsmaster, Kol Hallshimmered, struck down Uker singlehandedly with his masterful blade. Swordsmaster is an appropriate enough title for a dwarf such as him. I really hope it gets less exciting really soon.
(http://img693.imageshack.us/img693/4870/96674983.png)
I'm sure that everything will be just fine here in Batlefailed when everyone gets their stuff together.
evrything will be just fine, just fine, just fine, fine, just fine. fine. fine. just fine. just fine. fine. fine. fiiine. just fiine. fine fine. just fine. really great. fine. just fine. good. great. super. yes. super. super fine. just super fine. fine. super. super-de-duper. fine. just fine.
(http://img202.imageshack.us/img202/6745/17454038.png)
Nothing else happened, I tried to stem the tantrum spiral but this is the kind of thing that's happened to me before. We've got over seventy dwarves, you should at least be able to save a dozen of them.
oh, the floating miner got a fey mood. Good luck with that.
Post by: Zathel on July 17, 2010, 01:56:01 am
Guess how the beasts got in. All in the name of Fun, I guess. It's the beauty of succession forts. When you build it by yourself, preventing breaches of security is piece of cake.
Anyway, I wonder if situation will stabilize until my turn.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 17, 2010, 02:33:36 am
Journal of Creiyd Edusil, (date unintelligible)
Final Entry
-----
Something is wrong with Cog. Recently she's been espousing the same post-dwarvenist nonsense the late Andreus used to. I think Krimson's death touched her in the head. I'd feel bad for her if I hadn't given up caring.
The alarm has been sounded again. Those bloody goblins are back. Why in Lur's name did I join the military, anyway?
Post by: Andreus on July 17, 2010, 04:44:18 am
Battlefailed is 2010's Boatmurdered.
Together, through combined effort and force of will, we have created something to compare to that cthonian abyss from which so many dwarven legends have sprung. We have forged a new level of hell.
And it's not even over yet.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 17, 2010, 07:26:00 am
His first thought was, "I am dead." This was not a hunch, nor some arcane knowledge missing a cause. He simply felt no life inside of him. Some earlier part of him had fled. Maybe it was stress that was missing, or perhaps blood.
His certainty was helped by what he last remembered (a goblin's pike running him through), but that seemed so long ago now. The existence he'd clung to as a living dwarf was a foreign lamp in the dark distance. Now, a child's excitement was all he knew. Everything before was as a dream.
And what a dream! Before he'd even attempted to digest his surroundings, he was amazed at the inner world he found. The events of his life passed like the flipping pages of a book in the wind. But as he called each image to mind, he realized - with some horror - that he could no longer recognize many of the figures in them. Their identities were slipping away, less distinct from one other than single termites in a log. He started, fearing he might forget his own face.
Did he still have a face? A fast caress assured him that yes, he did - and a beard, too. All the parts seemed there, a fact apparent in his nakedness. This was surprising, to be sure (perhaps even disappointing), but what had he expected? Nothing specific he could recall. He'd tried to speculate before his time, like any mortal must once realizing the irrevocable approach of death. And wondering, in its own sneaky way, can lead to expectation, but what his were, he was not sure. This worried him, as he felt himself slipping away in a manner he could not fathom.
Creiyd then turned his thoughts to the existence of the afterlife (as all mortals do once learning about it) and this rumination arrested him for more minutes than he could count on four limbs.
It was night where he stood, which was in a patch of grassy, rolling hills stretched to the edge of his sight. A distant star, the only one out, glimmered in the sky. The crescent moon floated almost directly above him, and in its bruised ambiance he could see a brilliant patch of white flowers. They shone in the dimness, swaying in the wind, which he accepted as normal until he tried to feel the breeze around him and couldn't. Puzzled, he cautiously approached them and stopped there, kneeling beside the small beauties as they danced in slow circles.
He glanced to the right to be startled by a figure, draped in a magnificent red and white robe, moving toward him in alarming haste. The apparition glided, rather than walked, its hands concealed within the folds of his clothing. Soon the creature drew near enough for Creiyd to see its golden eyes and young, elfin face. "Avast, Creiyd Clearlanterns! Do not pick those flowers, for they are mine to admire! 'Tis I, Lur Thiefwitch, Lor'lady of Jealousy, who moves them thusly!" The being announced this title amidst a fanfare of white smoke, colored lights, and fluttering balls of paper that materialized loudly out of the air before him. His charcoal hair was long and stretched back, blowing in the non-existent breeze, and his eyes were encircled with dark paint that accented his elongated beard and eyelashes.
"Lur?" Creiyd asked, uncertain. "How can I know you aren't a trickster spirit? You may be a foul monster of the abyss!"
The creature smiled. "Laddie, if I were, you'd be dead in a whole new way. But if that's the way you want it?" The air around the two of them began to crackle with the smell of sulfur as shards of lightning passed through the air between them.
"My Lord! Lady!" cried Creiyd, prostrating himself before his god. "I am not worthy to receive you, verily though I wouldst beg to."
"Not at all, my good dwarf," said Lur with a smile that revealed a dazzling set of pointed white teeth. The cracks of lightning ceased, the air grew odorless once more. "I wanted to thank yeh for yer pathetic Temple by granting ye a personal greeting, now that ye made it here."
Not sure how he should feel about this, Creiyd asked, "If I may, Your Resplendence, where exactly is 'here?'"
"Here? Why, this is Limbo, land of the dead! Welcome!"
"Limbo?" Creiyd repeated. "So we Dwarves don't sleep in the stone forever?"
"Heavens no!" Lur exclaimed. "Oh, yeh won't be going there, though."
"What?" said Creiyd.
"Nothing, never mind," Lur said with a wave of his hand. "Come with me, ol' boy, there's someone who wants to see yeh." And then they were flying, only an instant later, it appeared to Creiyd, who felt the urge to vomit uncontrollably as they spiraled through the air at blurry speeds without any seen support or reason.
"Dreams'll often lie to gain their wings," Lur said with such conviction that Creiyd fought his sickness down to pay attention, "to get one foot out the door when the rest cannae fit through. Are yah payin' attention?"
Choking slightly, Creiyd answered, "Yes, m'Lor'lady!"
They flew not for long, but quite far, such that the sun had replaced the moon with enthusiasm by the time they landed. Together, the two dwarf-shaped beings followed a road that lead to a group of many pillars, geometrically arranged and standing tall. By the daylight they cast colossal shadows against the landscape. Creiyd was so awed by the fine pieces of architecture that he almost missed the familiar figure that emerged from behind one of them.
"C-Cog?" he stammered, his senses returning. "What in the Windy World?"
"Creiyd," she greeted him fondly, the musical voice striking a mast somewhere in his mind. Familiar, not yet a memory, but quickly becoming one. A memory is places visited, feelings had, people met and loved; this was something far more haunting.
"But I thought..." Creiyd began.
"...yeh cannae remember anyone from life?" Lur interrupted. "Well, not while they're still alive, no. But once yeh see them in Limbo, the memories come back. Otherwise ye'd miss your loved ones fiercely ere they died, no?" Lur rubbed his lips, a thoughtful expression crossing his face, and muttered, "There's an idea."
Creiyd caught her eyes with his, with an indecisive weightlessness on the inside, and as he surveyed her loveliness, each second unfolded into an inner battle: where one half of his hardened heart wished to stare in rapture, to hold her forever, while the other, wiser half screamed for caution against... something. Someone. Mercifully for Creiyd, this inner schism took a back seat to the buzzing warmth of seeing her again. Then he realized that all this meant she was dead.
"But you're alive!" Creiyd complained aloud. "I just had a conversation with you before the goblins came! You were..." Creiyd paused. "Not acting yourself..." he trailed off, his thoughts spinning. Cog frowned.
Before long, Lur said, "I believe I can provide some illumination." For a few seconds, the sun grew even brighter in the sky, and Lur laughed boorishly. Then the light faded back to normal, and the god spoke again, his voice growing serious.
"No, listen. A long time ago, in the first year of Battlefailed's founding, before either of you emigrated to that mire, a dwarf by the name of Andreus died unceremoniously within its infant halls. Without getting into details, let's say I owed him a favor, and he ended up getting a free ticket back to the Windy World. Now, before anyone asks, I'm not going to do that for either of you, ever. Sending mortal souls back to the physical plane tends to unravel things."
Creiyd and Cog both appeared confused. Lur sighed. "Look. Ye send a dead dwarf back into the old world, and it causes problems. There's a strict balance at work in the world - one body, one soul, no options. But Andreus went back and didn't think his old body was good enough. He took someone else's, creatin' a mortality deficit that Sahed's gonna kill me for."
"Sahed?" Creiyd whispered to Cog.
"God of Death and Rainbows," Cog whispered back.
Lur raised his hand toward the sky, and out of the ground popped a tree with skull-like knots protruding from the bark, the surface of which rippled like a pond disturbed and peeled away to the sides. Pictures began to form against the now-exposed heartwood of the tree. Creiyd and Cog watched, amazed, as the animated bark formed a lifelike rendition of Andreus sitting crouched in a tomb, painting small sigils on a coffin, with what looked suspiciously like blood.
"Andreus learned a few things in his time here," said Lur with a rueful stare at the sky. "There's a reason the dead are supposed to stay dead."
"Which you ignored," Cog pointed out.
"Guilty!" Lur grinned. "But listen, it gets better. There was a great commotion when one of the hellspawn from this world followed Andreus through the dimensional rift. Since neither of you fathom what that means for spacetime, I'll just mention that damned souls are now freely passing into and out of your old world, and the universe is falling apart at the seams."
The tree produced sound now, and image after horrifying image of the souls of Battlefailed's dead: some wailing through the halls invisibly, others pounding away futilely at ghostly coffins that yet held them trapped; scenes played of the newly-deceased being hurled across realities against their will, of unspeakable abominations screaming with violence as they ceaselessly raged against a shimmering wall of chromatic flame, smashing themselves upon it; the hellish chorus erupting whenever one broke through and vanished into the other side.
"Let us be clear on one thing," said the God of Jealousy, "Even here, a soul needs a vessel. It doesn't just vanish when its body is stolen. It has to go somewhere. The displaced soul of the first dwarf Andreus commandeered was twisted by the forces beyond the veil, and, well, look."
The tree now showed a hideous, gargantuan turtle, oozing a horrid-looking substance from its every pore as it writhed in seeming agony, moaning as it swam in its own filth. "He used to be such a cute little dwarf," said Lur.
Cog was the first to speak. "It's so horrible," she said.
"Andreus must pay," Creiyd said at last.
"Andreus died a second time," Lur continued, "drowning in the Blueness. This you both know. It was funny for me, after seein' him die of thirst once before. Only this time, he'd preemptively prepared himself for resurrection. He didn't even get to Limbo this time, or I'd have had more than words with him. He just skipped straight across town and took possession of one Cog Racksects, current mayor of Battlefailed - and knowing him, he'll probably perform that ritual again. And every time he does, the hole in reality will widen, 'til the whole mess utterly collapses."
Creiyd glanced over at Cog, who was doing her part to appear outraged. "And then what happens, Your Enviousness?" he asked.
"Then you find out what fun really means," Lur said darkly. "But anyway, sweetie, that's why you're here," he finished, gesturing at Cog with a leer.
For a while, no one spoke, until Creiyd asked, "Is that all, Your Feminence?"
"Well, the two o' yeh won' be a couple for long," Lur said, resuming his previous joviality as he chortled, rubbed his hands and peered into the strange tree's shifting display. "A bunch of yer friends are about to arrive."
Post by: TurkeyXIII on July 17, 2010, 10:12:11 am
Although the artefact window overlooked the third cavern level, while the death toad and shit monster came in from the second. The only FB in the third cavern (AFAIK) was the diamond slug that caught fire when Andreus flooded the place with magma.
These last two FBs aren't my fault, I swear!
Post by: Oglokoog on July 17, 2010, 10:42:26 am
Post by: Zathel on July 17, 2010, 03:38:50 pm
Oh man this is awesome, I reread robocorn's turn twice for the sheer hilarity of it.
Although the artefact window overlooked the third cavern level, while the death toad and shit monster came in from the second. The only FB in the third cavern (AFAIK) was the diamond slug that caught fire when Andreus flooded the place with magma.
These last two FBs aren't my fault, I swear!
Really? Hmmm... There must've been some breach left over from some construction project or exploratory shafts.
Hey, now that I think about it, everything started going downhill after I decided to move the whole mess that is Battlefailed deeper underground... well shit.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 17, 2010, 06:18:33 pm
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
This is the most gloriously messed up fortress I've ever loaded. And I thought Cavebrands was bad.
Wish me luck, guys.
Spoiler: Edit: (click to show/hide)
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 17, 2010, 08:42:09 pm
Fortress Log, 1st Granite, 511
-----
(http://i29.tinypic.com/xm1tzk.png)
(http://i29.tinypic.com/s16xl4.png)
Mayor Cog Racksects has been killed. In the absence of a formal leader (save that self-proclaimed "new mayor") I have assumed command of the outpost.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/foq935.png)
Battlefailed is in ruins. During the past year we have been assaulted not just by goblins but by what appear to be no less than the denizens of hell itself. A colossal mound of shit that killed half my comrades-in-arms, followed by a vast toad with a terrible fiery breath, that devoured the crippled survivors left in the shit demon's wake. Most of the official records have been destroyed, either in the attacks or in the following riots. I've been checking everyone out to see who's still sane enough to work.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/10msggn.png)
Perhaps sane is the wrong word. Anyone able to smile when the the place is covered in this much gore deserves to have it fixed in place. Still, happy is better than trying to kill me, and judging by the sizable body heap outside my office, I need to take what I can get at this point.
Battlefailed is on emergency lockdown. All work orders have been cancelled. Once the last-minute tasks are completed, the evacuation to Lower Lower Battlefailed will commence. We'll need to forget about anyone too far gone to heed the summons.
Post by: Robocorn on July 17, 2010, 09:17:30 pm
The original Matuin was around in the first turn and I think everyone that far back died.
Oh, watch out for the bridges, a lot of bridges were taken out by tantrumming dwarves and it cut off the outside world and a number of other things, watch out for levers too.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 18, 2010, 12:23:18 am
(http://i28.tinypic.com/33ljfb5.png)
"This striking image perfectly captures the essence of all dwarfanity."
"This striking image perfectly captures the essence of all dwarfanity."
Fortress Log, Supplemental
We will endure. I don't know how long the tribulations will last, but Battlefailed will succeed. By the gods, we'll become an outpost of bandits if we must.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/21j4w8p.png)
(http://i28.tinypic.com/ehk55c.png)
Before the emergency meeting was called, I stationed our new fortress guard inside the meeting hall and kitchens, just in case violence should ruin what I hope will be a productive evening. Unfortunately, some of the soldiers were waylaid when they found an enraged child savaging a popular Woodworker in Upper Battlefailed. I was told the situation is under control.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/deo681.png)
I hope they don't hurt the lass. She's just feisty is all.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/14kxkdy.png)
A murder was committed in the meeting hall before the discussions even began. We are now without our Chief Medical Dwarf. I've assigned a lowly animal dissector to act as a triage nurse until I can find a better replacement.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/24q5l6s.png)
Meanwhile, only a few yards away, the military put down another one of the crazies.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2uggeqh.png)
My god... this was a terrible idea. The meeting has adjourned into chaos.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/2dv1non.png)
(http://i30.tinypic.com/8yw287.png)
(http://i25.tinypic.com/vhg9w8.png)
(http://i30.tinypic.com/8yw287.png)
(http://i25.tinypic.com/vhg9w8.png)
...
Two weeks later...
(http://i29.tinypic.com/141qcxz.png)
"Hey guys, check out these white oxen!"
=-=-=-=-=-=
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: Robocorn on July 18, 2010, 01:12:35 am
Battlefailed could be the first succession game to survive two tantrum spirals.
Post by: Eric Blank on July 18, 2010, 01:27:24 am
Post by: Zathel on July 18, 2010, 07:38:37 am
Because that's just what true dwarves would do.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 18, 2010, 09:11:14 am
-----
After our long journey, we finally arrived at the place Her Majesty the Bitch told us about. The Blueness of Malodors. It's the ugliest place I have ever been. The shoreline is just a barren rocky slope dipping into a murky sea that smells of turpentine and rotting old sweet pods. Malodors indeed. That confounded liaison will be hearing from me when he gets here.
This place has a horrible reputation. The fortress of Battlefailed (if it even still exists) is supposed to be nearby, but there's no other settlement for miles, so unless we make contact, we're on our own until Autumn. We have a lot of work to do. I've been surveying the land while some of the wrestlers break down the wagon. My cat's run off somewhere, I'm a little worried about her, but to be honest I don't yet see what all the fuss is about. It's just a smelly old beach with a moldy old keep in the distance to the west, and a few roaming white musk oxen near to the south. What in the sunny hells are those things?!
(http://i30.tinypic.com/313t4dj.png)
A great skeletal monster charged across the beach toward us, goring Deduk the blacksmith before anyone could react. Several more of the creatures came into view surrounding us as Deduk screamed like an elfwench. While the warriors among us rushed to defend our camp, the rest of us ran for safety to the northern shore.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/2rrt0s7.png)
The smith bled to death during the fighting.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/23vyo37.png)
Once the undead muskoxen were finally driven off, another herd of skeletal beasts ambushed our beleaguered guards. The battle was horrible. They make a sound like that of a cave lobster boiling alive, if a thousand times louder and marked by the rattling of bones. They stomped our able-bodied dwarves into whimpering paste before they turned their wrath on the wagon and smashed up all our supplies.
(http://i25.tinypic.com/fvbx3p.png)
Two kittens bravely stood their ground against a skorse before teaching it what kittens taste like.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/2lnu9v5.png)
Enraged, the peasant woman Adil bore down on one of the brutes without assistance.
(http://i25.tinypic.com/2wc4mki.png)(http://i32.tinypic.com/34sgkgg.png)
That ended predictably.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/140lms.png)
I'm not sure how we have survived. Eleven of us were here an hour ago; now four remain: Myself, the Glassmaker, the other Peasant and the Tanner. What the hell was the Queen thinking? A dwarven paradise? Not that I had believed her, but one would think she'd maybe mention the local HORDE OF EVIL before sending us off on our way.
Actually, now that I really think about it, I know exactly what she was thinking. "I hate dwarves and I want them to die."
I've been digging down into the dry cliff away from the evil surface as fast as I can. I wanted to explore the land and find Battlefailed, but that will have to wait. We daren't leave the relative safety of our hideaway and risk drawing the skorses' attentions.
There's no good food or water above ground, so we've got to reach the caverns below, and its fresh water and mushrooms, before we end up looking like our friends outside.
-=-=-=-=-
Meanwhile, deep within Battlefailed...
-=-=-=-=-
Journal of Creiydrek Yearrings, Overseer and Talented Siege Operator, Excerpts
-----
When the dust finally settled after the Great Berserking, there were only forty-nine of us left. Forty-nine Dwarves, when last year there lived and worked over a hundred. And more than half of 'em killed, not by misfortune or in the defense of our home, but at the hands of their own friends and neighbors. I ask you, journal, what is the point of all our walls and defenses if our greatest enemies are already among us?
(http://i32.tinypic.com/16c73ev.png)
The once proud City of Battlefailed has withered into a zoo of horrors soaked with the tears and cruelty of mad dwarves. The shrieking of the tormented throughout can be heard at all hours of day, bouncing through the halls of stone to threaten every ear still lucid enough to be troubled by hearing it. Wherever one goes, one may expect to find old stains of blood or bones whose owners have long been forgotten.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/vqs5tk.png)
It's glorious.
It's perfect, in fact. Where else could a fella like me become Overseer of the entire stinking Fortress? It isn't the spiffiest place, I'll admit that cleanly. In fact, not a single other dwarf wanted the damn job, and who can blame them? Someone's gonna be held responsible for this mess. Any dwarf'll do for now, and I did. I can live like a king while all these screw-ups waste each other. There aren't too many dwarves left to manage, who haven't completely lost their marbles, anyway. I just need to figure out who to keep happy with what excuses and let the good times roll.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2hh2fm9.png)
Good news, everyone! Monom's gone apeshit!
(http://i25.tinypic.com/24ccg7c.png)
Our Captain of the Guard rammed her mace into the metalsmith with such gusto that in the end there was little left of him but some bloody rags and a smear on the floor. Sigun is one dwarf I intend to keep happy.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/2vloc5w.png)
Instead of updating our stockpile records like I asked him to, our Hoardmaster had been spending his time lying in the entrance hall, throwing silver arrows at passers-by. This did not amuse the guards on patrol duty.
Compared to the carnage of the previous weeks, the first days of my term have been wonderful. If things stay this marvelous I may just have to retire early.
Nearby elsewhere...
(http://i31.tinypic.com/205cnzt.png)
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 18, 2010, 09:49:01 am
"Aiiieeeee!!!"
(http://i25.tinypic.com/mr3daw.png)
"It's Squirtedfork the Crewed Martyr!"
"Kill it!"
(http://i25.tinypic.com/22j4bb.png)
(http://i32.tinypic.com/nwiuxz.png)
(http://i27.tinypic.com/160pffb.png)
(http://i28.tinypic.com/2wegcix.png)
"No, Kadol! NOOOO!"
(http://i31.tinypic.com/28s7uir.png)
Sethrist Oraclefortress, Expedition Leader's Log, Supplemental
I am now the last living dwarf here. Kadol and the others were slaughtered by a skorse early this morning, while finishing up the doors for the shaft entrance. They'll never be placed now. Since there is nothing left on the surface for me, I am plunging down as deep as I can, in hopes of finding some food and shelter in the caverns below.
Right now I'm trying not to think about anything but digging. I'll keep digging 'til I find something.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/z1vg4.png)
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 18, 2010, 10:59:29 am
The first week of Slate has passed without a single death. I'm not sure if I'm ready to thank the gods just yet, but I've taken my hand off my sword hilt for now.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/2dw7pjp.png)
A legendary miner by the name of Matuin has informed me of her decision to carve out a new section of the fort for those of us still aware of reality. I'm not pleased with the autonomy of this plan, but I've made it a rule to give the dwarves with weapons what they want, and I'm not about to tell such an illustrious dwarf what she can't do. As such, she's the only dwarf in the fort beside myself who has sneaked out of corpse removal duties.
Picture this, if you will: I'm walking over to the hospital to visit the wounded when I hear a bloodcurdling howl coming from up the central stair.
(http://i25.tinypic.com/3vibc.png)
This anus of a dwarf Lokum has complained so often about having to "drag those miserable sacks to the hospital so they can die there instead of the floor," that I've contemplated throwing him into the Lake of Slime. Generously, I cut his alcohol rations in half instead. I also doubled his work shifts. For some reason, his demeanor failed to improve.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/2w54wf7.png)
Anyways, Tulon, our resident broker-by-day-warrior-by-night, trudges up the stairs carrying the corpse of one of his closest friends slung over his shoulder. With tears in his eyes, he marches purposefully toward the outside world to lay his comrade to rest in the most dignified (undignified) manner possible. Lokum takes one look at him, his expression softening, and he moves toward Tulon, as if to give him a hand...
(http://i27.tinypic.com/25fhw87.png)
...and beats the living daylights out of him.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/2yjvujt.png)
His outburst leaving his lust for violence unsatisfied, he sprinted to the hospital, where he found a two-month old baby on the floor. He then did what any sensible person does after finding a baby on the hospital floor, and punched it in the face. He punched it in the face. THE FUCKER PUNCHED A BABY IN THE FACE.
(http://i25.tinypic.com/1z1uyx0.png)
Now that I have seen the depths to which the dwarven soul may plummet, I don't think any barbarousness will surprise me again. Thank the gods that Fisherdwarf what's-her-name was there. Thanks to her, the child lives and there's one less psychopath in the world. I didn't think any dwarf was capable of such an act. By sheer dumb luck the infant managed to come out of the encounter unscathed, but she was covered in so much of her assailant's blood that I believe she'll be traumatized all the same.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/2w2k0f7.png)
Have I mentioned we have nearly a hundred caged goblins and skeletons at our disposal? What to do with them, I wonder.
Aside from the assault and baby-punching incident, the month is going by very smoothly. I may actually be alive this time next year. It's a remarkable feeling.
Five minutes later...
(http://i32.tinypic.com/20tm5o8.png)
Post by: Pisano on July 18, 2010, 11:08:04 am
Post by: Robocorn on July 18, 2010, 11:25:16 am
Quote
I know exactly what she was thinking. "I hate dwarves and I want them to die."You've said about Led what this fortress has been implying for years. She's over ninety years old so if we ever do get her over she'll probably be dead on arrival.
Post by: Samthere on July 18, 2010, 05:49:31 pm
Post by: NightmareBros on July 18, 2010, 06:16:09 pm
Put them between you and that forgotten beast.
With luck, the goblins will wear the beast down enough for an easy kill. If your luckier, The goblins will kill it, leaving easy goblin kills for whatever dwarf crosses their path.
If your unlucky the forgotten beast will mearly be slowed down enough for you to wall it off from your sane dorfs.
Post by: melkorp on July 18, 2010, 06:30:21 pm
What ... happened here?
Post by: Robocorn on July 18, 2010, 06:44:26 pm
(Mouth hanging slackly open)Fun. Lots of it.
What ... happened here?
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 18, 2010, 09:18:20 pm
I couldn't find Samrist in the units list, but I did find a deceased Samrek and a deceased Samzul. It's possible Samrist was bodysnatched by a former overseer and his identity hidden.
The surviving named dwarves are as follows: Matuin: legendary miner, Leesin: legendary miner in temporal stasis in the cursed arena, Ilmoran: legendary mason, and that's it. If anyone wants to be dwarfed/re-dwarfed please say so.
Spoiler: Edit: Things to Come? (click to show/hide)
Post by: Andreus on July 18, 2010, 11:06:47 pm
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 18, 2010, 11:54:36 pm
(http://i27.tinypic.com/x5wnr4.png)
I've encountered some kind of cave demon. I... I don't think I'll be leaving this place alive.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/2v965c2.png)
(http://i30.tinypic.com/5vp0mc.png) | (http://i31.tinypic.com/2431b4o.png)
(http://i27.tinypic.com/35lclmo.png)
(http://i25.tinypic.com/dbs281.png)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: Andreus on July 19, 2010, 12:47:07 am
My god... this was a terrible idea.
Robocorn, put this quote in the OP please. I think it neatly summarises every decision made in Battlefailed since it began.
Post by: Zathel on July 19, 2010, 04:44:46 am
So, Osman was let out from the underground to the surface? And it will, using it's clairvoyant powers, make it's way right into Battlefailed? Oh, how fun! At least our military got plenty of practice hacking living targets apart!
Post by: melkorp on July 19, 2010, 06:12:47 am
(http://i27.tinypic.com/1j6ez5.png)
Sigun Hamerack the Cremation of Dunes? Rakust Battlearrows the Creepy Omen? These are the heroes of the (presumably) long-since-annihilated Earthen Gloves, if I remember right. Hmm, what's covered in both horse and squad blood?...
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 19, 2010, 06:57:30 am
(http://i30.tinypic.com/2u8hwyb.png)
Journal of Overseer Creiydrek Yearrings, Excerpts
Slate
Here was the Duty Roster this morning:
- 1 me, overseeing the "fortress."
- 1 legendary miner, digging a new fort section.
- 13 soldiers, doing soldierly things.
- 1 woodworker, refusing to do work.
- 1 terrible doctor, not doing his job.
- 1 legendary mason, disposing of corpses.
- 1 bookkeeper, disposing of corpses.
- 1 bone carver, disposing of corpses.
- 1 blacksmith, disposing of corpses.
- 1 brewer, sleeping.
- 7 children, two of them badly mangled and in comas.
- 4 babies, two of them starving to death, one sitting in the hospital and one being carried by her melancholic mother.
- 5 cripples, wasting our food as they lie in bed, useless.
- 7 mad dwarves, scaring the pants off of us.
- 2 lost souls, endlessly floating in the Accursed Arena. More on them and that later.
We are left with a frighteningly low number capable of performing actual work. This called for some serious reassignment of the schedules. Our mason has been set to work on coffins for our fallen. For my part, I've been carrying food and booze down to the new fort section being carved out. If we need to seal ourselves in there the point will be to survive for a while, not worry about farm operations.
I've cut the ranks of the Fortress Guard down to our five most accomplished axedwarves. They are to spend their free time cleaning up all the corpses and body parts they scattered about the place, an arrangement they've accepted as just. I've had to disband the lofty Earthen Gloves, as they refused to stop training in light of our need for more civilian discipline. Despite this blow to morale, the new squad is excited at the prospect of a fresh beginning and Sigun has chosen a name she hopes will reflect it.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/1i0551.png)
Most of them received their title after the Great Berserking, during which they each took the lives of at least three dwarves - with the exception of Atis, who only killed two, poor thing.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/rjgjo5.png)
Dishmab was relieved from guard duties, her insatiable thirst for blood having earned the scorn of her peers, who refer to her only as "Murderer." I have neglected to point out the hypocrisy at work here.
Meanwhile, I've limited the militia to our Swordsmistress and Zon Ethadadil, who is a legendary swordsdwarf AND stonecrafter. Talented fellow. If we didn't need so many coffins he'd be making toys. The Furnace Operator is now Chief Engineer since we lack for anyone better.
Our Battle-Broker has been elected Battle-Mayor. He met the news with characteristic joy.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/6ylgdt.png)
I've made the difficult decision to continue feeding the wounded, but I've assigned just one dwarf to it, one of the former soldiers. The previous doctor has been assigned to hauling duty. In the meantime, I resumed production of booze and plump helmets, and have begun reconstruction of the main bridge.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/warc4y.png)
A colossal defensive weapon, the brainchild of our former child prodigy, has had its construction suspended until further notice.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/2vucy7c.png)
Today I took my weekly trip to the hospital to check on the invalids.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/15gs10x.png)
Well, that's beautiful. I love walking downstairs first thing in the morning to smell someone's carnal wreckage oozing all over the floor. These soldiers need to quit polishing their axes and get this shit out of there before I trick them into killing each other.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/xlihpv.png)
I had words with the Babysaver Oddom at the top of the stairs. She woke up with a numb foot. It's all very mysterious.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/2z5mbzr.png)(http://i25.tinypic.com/2lmp2k5.png)
Our wounded are doomed, but they cling to life by a thread. If they die one by one the shock may be dampened a little; then again, maybe shock after shock would be worse. Time will tell.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/2py2t5i.png)
As I sat listening to a dying dwarf's final requests, I watched as the new Doctor attempted to suture a patient and got punched in the head for his efforts. I hope he isn't scared away from trying to heal others.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/zy7s7d.png)
The abusive patient spent the next five minutes screaming at her child before breaking into wretched heaving sobs. Her child looked up at me, as if I could provide her some comfort, or an explanation. I didn't know what to say, so I told her she could help me break down a floor later. I don't think I provided much cheer.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/b9dfrb.png)
This is the Accursed Arena, which I believe is a portal to hell. No one ever wants to go in there. A mysterious floor collapse back when it was being built trapped two of the unfortunate miners present. To this day they hover there in the air without sound or motion like a pair of floating flesh statues. They don't look alive, but they don't look dead either. Only they know if they're conscious.
I have concocted a plan to free them that will make everyone love me. If a cave-in trapped them the way they are now, then maybe a cave-in will free them. I've called for the necessary mechanics to be set in place. I hope this works, let's hope Otik's got my back on this one.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/2mpj5et.png)
17th Slate
I checked in with the workers this afternoon. How's that new wing coming along, Matuin?
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2h54j7o.png)
Okay. How about you, bookkeeper? Making progress?
(http://i30.tinypic.com/aucpwl.png)
I see. And you, brewer? Are we still running out of booze?
(http://i28.tinypic.com/zkn4vq.png)
I sigh at these people.
19th Slate
While I was busy thinking up ways to punish our brewer for his incompetence, Tulon the Battle-Mayor rushed up to me with urgent news.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/vy3w53.png)
Good for the bloody buzzards, I guess they're building nests for the wee ones or something. Oddly enough, they showed no interest in the massive pile of dwarf fragments rotting along the shore.
21st Slate
(http://i26.tinypic.com/mrtnro.png)
On the one-month anniversary of my becoming Overseer, the mayor went crazy. At least he no longer suffers, I hope.
Slate 24
The buzzards attacked in force today. The first of them were spotted flying over the walls by the Fortress Guard, but they flew right past and into the fortress proper.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/sct1g1.png)
Soon there were dead buzzards in every corner of Battlefailed, both before and after they stopped moving.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/2wekup5.png)
Three melancholics died of thirst last night within minutes of each other. Now at least we have coffins to throw them in. Also, the Woodcrafter took off his clothes in the dining room and hasn't stopped laughing since. Tulon the Crazed Battle-Mayor joined him up on the table. One can only hope Felsite is so tranquil as the last month.
Meanwhile.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/1jum2r.png)
Post by: Zathel on July 19, 2010, 11:18:44 am
What's the height of happiness achieved by dwarves of Battlefailed? Content? Sad? Maybe ecstatic? There has to be at least one happy dwarf amidst all that chaos, it wouldn't be Dwarf Fortress otherwise.
Post by: Eric Blank on July 19, 2010, 02:37:49 pm
I think toady should force the emotional state of the deceased to reflect their position in the afterlife, based on their personality/deeds versus the ethics of their civilization. (if we consider these identical to the will of the gods of said civilization.) There are gonna be a lot of elves and goblins in their heavens, for whom heinous acts are the standard, and a lot of humans and dwarves in their hells, because they're still idiots despite the gods' constant screaming in their ears.
Post by: Andreus on July 19, 2010, 03:31:48 pm
despite the gods' constant screaming in their ears.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Thakom Earthgems remains silent.
Post by: Twobeard on July 19, 2010, 06:42:15 pm
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 19, 2010, 07:12:31 pm
Felsite
A new mayor was elected, and I took the chance to speak with her today. She's a likable young lass.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/3443vwn.png)
She's a former member of the Earthen Gloves, and she has a taste for giant spider meat, so kudos to her. The only complaint I have is her demand that we switch to ranged weapons. Nobody's using crossbows, I told her, but she was adamant that I provide at least one new quiver to prove that I'm considering the request. There's just no getting through to some folks. At any rate, the talk turned to the state of the fortress (ha!) and her new mayoral accommodations, which will be ready as soon as all the bodies are removed.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/2dnmnd.png)
Taking a short but well-earned break from my duties, I spent a few hours earlier taking stock of the local artwork. Here are a few of the finer examples.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/2nqe0rm.jpg)
This beast is pictured all over the fort, for some reason. Whatever this creature did to the world really impressed us.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/fenupx.png)
Celebrations of Sigun are also common.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/2eg9tzc.jpg)
Such items may be the only thing keeping her from snapping, come to think on it.
Most of the engravings and statues around are of mundane events and political seals, and some represent unpleasant things from our past. Usually I see such images as a reminder of dwarven integrity, but if you ask me, that stuff has no business being in the hospital.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/1rzxcp.png)
(http://i31.tinypic.com/znx153.png)
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2aepfl0.png)
(http://i31.tinypic.com/znx153.png)
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2aepfl0.png)
As our comrades died of thirst they got to gaze upon gorgeous statues of dwarves dying of thirst.
The floor engravings are hardly better.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/n1tm4o.png)
(http://i28.tinypic.com/34hb8s3.png)
(http://i28.tinypic.com/34hb8s3.png)
I've kept the couple engravers we have from drawing pictures just yet. I mean, we're trying to forget recent events, not commemorate them.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/nb55sh.png)
Speaking of the hospital, Babysaver Oddom informed me that the place was once a series of upper-class homes for the local gentry. That certainly explains the opulence. And here I was thinking we cared about our wounded, how silly of me.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/2iv1jqv.png)
In contrast, the former hospital is a blighted, ash-filled mess, destroyed during the rampage of Uker Filthspit just a few months ago. I've turned it into a furniture stockpile.
(http://i25.tinypic.com/1zv4ac0.png)
On my way back from visiting the few wounded who yet lived, I watched one of the psychotic locals walk past me, vomit neatly into a bucket, and walk away without offering so much as a look.
8th Felsite
(http://i29.tinypic.com/20zqrrs.png)
Matuin's been missing for a week now. I hope she's okay.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
12th Felsite
(http://i31.tinypic.com/2vmtxg8.png)
We initiated the plan to free the two trapped miners from the Arena. The first step involves going back inside the place, and no one volunteered for that, so I gently persuaded two children and the idiot bookkeeper. This way, if something goes wrong we won't lose anyone useful.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/2n6dvrc.png)
The device is ready. Here goes nothing.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/hv2o28.png)(http://i28.tinypic.com/2dlr7l3.png)(http://i26.tinypic.com/ve9fo9.png)
The dust cloud was immense. But did it work?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
17th Felsite
(http://i26.tinypic.com/xanehj.png)
One of the lookouts spotted the elven caravan on the horizon. We desperately need their supplies, so for the first time in months, we unlocked the entrance.
While I was visiting her in the absurdly lavish hospital, Kol the Swordsmistress told me in confidence that Kubuk's parents were eaten by elves before his very eyes, back when he was a child. Kol warned me not to let him near the traders during this time of strife. I took heed and told him to perform some basic training maneuvers for the duration of their stay.
(http://i25.tinypic.com/2yuyomc.png)
The elves were first greeted by Erib Tomecatch, a mad woodcrafter who ran outside the moment we lowered the gate. After shouting obscenities at our visitors, he screamed away from the fortress in what must be hailed as an act of profound sensibility. I don't expect any grief about locking him out there. As soon as the merchants were in, it was done.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/jkj1ux.png)
The local unlife showed no interest in either the elves or our momentarily-open gate. It may only be my imagination, but I think they are instinctively scared of us.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2rha8nl.png)
The elves entered into an eerily quiet hall in a fortress once teeming with business. They prove to be a shockingly decent bunch when we finally meet them, though for some reason they felt obliged to point out how badly we needed their help. As if I didn't know already, but at least they didn't see the Room of Mephitis or they would have run for the hills like old Erib did.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/16baqea.png)
The Room of Mephitis
The Room of Mephitis
Their leader Aweme is a delightful lass with the fairest blonde hair I'd ever seen. If she weren't an elf, I would gladly take her to dinner and bed. She told me a flowery tale of a battle her kind fought with goblins over four hundred years ago. It was really quite fascinating. After an hour or so of such pleasantries, I managed to trade off some of our extra mechanisms for a respectable quantity of food, booze, and wood. This has been a fine day for Dwarf-Elf relations.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/8wz5om.png)
NO KUBUK DON'T
(http://i26.tinypic.com/vy2xjq.png)
Well, dinner's now out of the question.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/1zcz2qh.png)
As the children and I looked on in horror, Kubuk stormed into the Trade Depot brandishing his axe and bisected every last elf in sight, providing our Trade Depot with a muddy red coat of fresh paint. By an amazing stroke of luck, this appears to have been a momentary lapse of reason in lieu of a permanent one. He trudged off silently after it was all over, and once the initial shock wore off, I told the Peasant nearby to take the elf bits outside and start butchering the warthogs. Everything else in the caravan is ours now. As if we had a use for a dozen wooden swords.
Oh, good, the mayor's approaching. Pray thee, lass, what new horrors await my ears?
(http://i28.tinypic.com/53367n.png)
She's dead?! I just spoke to her a few days ago! She only went in there for a fractured rib! All Meng had to do was bring her some water and the Slayer of Uker would still be alive! The fact that she was beautiful has everything to do with my outrage!
It's not like we don't have any damn water!
(http://i27.tinypic.com/1yk8ww.jpg)
What in the nineteen hells is more important to him than taking care of his patients!?
(http://i27.tinypic.com/1zflg8i.png)
You son of a bitch.
25th Felsite
No one has seen Matuin the entire month. I'm heading to the stock room to drop off a shield, so while I'm there I think I'll grab a pick and go down to the new wing she's been digging to find out if she's still alive.
(http://i25.tinypic.com/zmboe1.png)
This seems like a good time to mention that I've been completely naked since the beginning of the week. Well, not completely naked, mind you. I need the boot so my foot won't fall off! Ha-hee-hee-hee-haw!
Anyways the boot fell off, so I dug most nudely toward Matuin's last known whereabouts.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/zix253.png)
At least, I did for a while.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/n4d4km.png)
Digging is hard! I told the ex-soldier Fikod Boatscarnage to finish for me. He was just hauling trash around anyway.
(http://i25.tinypic.com/4rf2bc.png)
I won't even comment on the poetic genius of his title. He went down with the pick in my stead, giving me a reproachful look as he left. What? I'm not the only one trying life without clothes. At least I can still speak proper Dwarvish, unlike some of the other specimens.
In the past month many of the insane dwarves and half of the wounded have died. Three infants perished as well, all of 'em from of lack of drink. I dunno why nobody fed them. I guess we each thought someone else was doing it. There are only thirty-four of us left now. On the bright side of it, a delicious cat has become a stray.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/30as309.jpg)
To end the month on a happy note for a change, Fikod discovered Matuin was hunting rats for food, half-starved to death, but alive all the same. Turns out she mined away the original entryway, and by the time she realized her mistake she was too weak from hunger to lift her pick and carve a new way out. Right. Whatever her reasoning, I think we're all glad she is safe.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/5y6dy0.png)
Poor lass has gone off to get a drink now. With her disappearance off my mind, I can rest easier and concentrate on preparing the new area for habitation. Things are looking up now.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/mttqfq.png)
Our doctor sickens me.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/dlryhx.png)
Post by: Pisano on July 19, 2010, 07:37:03 pm
ģddor Deerlies the Moist Grotto was a savanna titan. It was the only one of its kind. A towering blob composed of salt. It has three long, straight tails and it has a bloated body. ģddor was associated with treachery, rivers, plants, nature and animals.
In a time before time, ģddor began wandering The Plains of Ooze
---
So it seems that this savanna titan that the dwarves of Battlefailed are so fond of is was made of salt and roamed the Plains of Ooze. Maybe such a titan was able to absorb the foul beasts made of shit, grime, and muck, several of which have been plaguing Battlefailed. Or maybe not.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: Robocorn on July 19, 2010, 07:49:30 pm
Of course, this means that there are dozens of engravings that look like this
(http://img828.imageshack.us/img828/5695/iddor.png)
Post by: melkorp on July 19, 2010, 09:25:43 pm
Melkorp Goldthunder has been ecstatic lately. He admired a masterful engraving recently.(http://i27.tinypic.com/n1tm4o.png)
Post by: Twobeard on July 19, 2010, 10:01:29 pm
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 19, 2010, 10:20:14 pm
I think a lot of the engravers we had were history buffs as opposed to creative types. So instead of getting pictures of hugging cows or two unicorns, we got pictures of Ģddor Deerlies the Moist Grotto traveling because it was the only event that occurred in the region before we got here.
Of course, this means that there are dozens of engravings that look like this
(http://img828.imageshack.us/img828/5695/iddor.png)
How much do you think Led would let the dwarves learn about her favorite deathtrap for them? "Oh, not much ever happened there. Just a big blob of salt that used to wander around before time."
They're covering the fortress in the image of that lie as a statement of defiance.
Post by: TurkeyXIII on July 20, 2010, 12:50:18 am
If i wasnt so intimidated/retarded, i would totally love to be a part of this.Don't let that stop you, nobody else has!
Post by: Robocorn on July 20, 2010, 01:54:33 am
If i wasnt so intimidated/retarded, i would totally love to be a part of this.Don't let that stop you, nobody else has!
Zathel's a pretty good manager if I remember correctly. You'll probably just wind up on bone duty unless you're incredibly incompetent (like me).
Speaking of which, you know how most large forts have a problem with rocks? We have a bone problem, we may have more bones than rocks. Oh gods do we ever have bones. I was trying to turn them into gauntlets and totems and helms but there just wasn't enough dwarfpower to get it done and I was afraid to work on magma dumping. FYI, the yellow diamond slug is still alive in the magma sea, however it is on fire, so if you forget this it will be awesome.
Post by: Zathel on July 20, 2010, 02:40:13 am
Zathel's a pretty good manager if I remember correctly. You'll probably just wind up on bone duty unless you're incredibly incompetent (like me).
My track record involves moving Battlefailed underground which started all this freaking insanity in the first place :D . Oh well. I just had luck that when my term started, things were peaceful and stagnant, food plentiful and there were no goblins nearby. Actually, goblins started attacking during my turn.
I just wonder if we can recover. I'd like to get Battlefailed to full strength, with strong, trained militia and bustling trade, and then dig hard and deep into Adamantite (we have located a vein, iirc).
Post by: Robocorn on July 20, 2010, 03:05:31 am
I think we'll be able to continue as long as there are dwarves in Swordboot, maybe they'll send us humans when they run out.
Post by: Zathel on July 20, 2010, 06:50:52 am
Anyway, either me or Pisano will have a chance to get this den of entropy back in order. Hopefully.
So we can dig into adamantite, as I said earlier. Heh.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 20, 2010, 07:10:09 am
Post by: Andreus on July 20, 2010, 07:31:53 am
It is a bleak legend, a cautionary tale as to the heights of dwarven hubris and the depths to which it will bring all dwarfkind.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 20, 2010, 09:36:27 am
Hematite
(http://i31.tinypic.com/iokxz9.png)
It's so hot and sticky that all the other dwarves have begun to copy my recent uptake of nudism.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/5xr85y.png)
Correction, almost all of them. The soldiers refuse to be defenseless, even though they're off-duty.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/15n385y.png)
I'm not normally one for immodesty but my definition of normal has been so far stretched that it's cracked and splintered beneath the weight of this horrible fetid ocean we can't even swim in because we'd rather be hot and sticky and naked than wade in that filth, not that any of us are good swimmers anyway and I think I'm starting to ramble so I'm going to lay down for a while before I totally lose myself.
Spoiler: Author's Note: (click to show/hide)
2nd Hematite
Feeling a bit better today. I still dread waking, but at least I'm thirsty for booze again.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/168aatx.png)
Right before lunch I saw a fight break out in the dining hall. I didn't even know Tulon was still alive.
(http://i25.tinypic.com/1eq343.png)
Yes, it seems that two years old is old enough to both comprehend the deaths of your parents and identify the nearest defenseless psychotic to take it out on. Bravo, little Edzul. She'll make a fine warrior if she lives long enough to grow up. Incidentally, her father happens to be the late baby-puncher.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2nq9nyb.png)
Fortunately for her, Sigun is too busy hauling monkey bones to kill children.
3rd Hematite
This evening we found Matuin dead and withered about forty feet away from the booze stockpile. Where is the justice?
(http://i26.tinypic.com/4ut349.png)
6th Hematite
I worry that I'm losing my mind. My thoughts keep turning to very dark corners, especially those for the doctor Meng. I catch myself dreaming up ways to torment him. I decided to take a walk through Upper Battlefailed to clear my head. What was I thinking?
(http://i28.tinypic.com/15p1tm9.png)
I noticed, during my trip, that an outrageously ornate tomb had been built for our late child prodigy. While such waste of space may have been permissible during Battlefailed's better days (oh gods how I miss them), recent events have forced on us a more practical approach. I have no qualms about the child keeping his burial chamber, but it needs to be designated for more coffins.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2ez31j6.png)
(http://i29.tinypic.com/2qwk5zn.png)
(http://i29.tinypic.com/2qwk5zn.png)
After being caught in a rainstorm, Edzul threw a tantrum and started battering another one of the mindless dwarves. She's quite strong for a toddler, but I really hope she calms down. I can't protect her from Sigun if she starts beating down on the sane ones.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/3539swh.png)
Her entire family is dead except for her comatose brother, the poor dear. I think I'll take her under my wing. The lass needs guidance, maybe a puppy, and perhaps a new bedroom with some groundhog cages. What little 'un doesn't like groundhogs?
(http://i26.tinypic.com/14m72va.png)
(http://i30.tinypic.com/1z5rud2.png)
(http://i30.tinypic.com/1z5rud2.png)
I went to the mayor to discuss the adoption procedures, but she was incensed about her 'numbness' (that's all she would say) and was hurrying off to the hospital to get checked at. Yes, Mayor, I'm certain the good doctor will be able to assist you.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/34dr5p0.png)
Just let me know when you're ready to punch him and I'll hold him down for you.
9th Hematite
I have discovered the source of the smell coming from the northern room in the main hall.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/687tjn.png)
Someone has placed several undead animals in this otherwise empty room for some purpose I cannot imagine. If they were trying to set a trap for the caravans, they chose a rather oblong approach.
Our butcher has assumed a colorful new title and identity. He can call himself whatever he likes, but he's still just a butcher.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/20pwit0.png)
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2q8ncps.png)
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2q8ncps.png)
In the meantime, our horrified mayor's condition worsens. To my astonishment, the doctor has not had a chance to check in with her. I'm unsure why I keep calling him a doctor.
13th Hematite
(http://i26.tinypic.com/106y8lw.png)(http://i26.tinypic.com/keclxy.png)(http://i31.tinypic.com/2rx7cau.png)
I fear the miners in the Arena are truly beyond our reach, temporally speaking. The one higher in the air is occupying the same space as a solid pillar in a clear violation of all known physics. Perhaps they are ghosts, trapped between worlds, or something worse. Whatever the case, I've gone back to the drawing board.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/t4us8p.png)
Regarding the arena, there are six levers by the front door and nobody knows what they do. I've resisted the temptation to determine their function as I'm convinced one of them opens the monster cages I mentioned earlier.
Tulon the former Battle Mayor has starved to death. He's the first person to die from something other than thirst in recent memory so I've decided to throw a party in the dining room tomorrow. Otik knows we need the morale boost.
14th Hematite
Oh, come on, guys...
(http://i30.tinypic.com/30m5puo.png)
Really? The Elf corpses were never removed from the Depot? They were just shoved under the loading platform and now the entire hall smells worse than the Blueness itself? When I find that peasant I'm going to throttle him.
You know what? I don't care. The party's on.
16th Hematite
(http://i28.tinypic.com/34sh0dh.png)
(http://i28.tinypic.com/658wsk.png)
(http://i28.tinypic.com/658wsk.png)
Turns out I won't have to make that quiver I was never going to make. In an upset victory, Twobeard has been elected mayor of the fort. I guess that change of identity served him well. Understandably, it's so hard to stand out when you share a first name with the badaxe Captain of the Guard:
Spoiler: Sigun Hamerack, the Cremation of Dunes. (click to show/hide)
Oh my good gods
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2s9pxs1.png)
I strictly forbade Cerol from playing in the corpse pile ever again.
19 Hematite
I have personally determined the cause of the mysterious outbreak of numbness.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/2upadu8.png)
I suppose we deserve it for walking around barefoot everywhere, but who in their right mind leaves a pile of numbing dust* in a pathway for someone else in their right mind to step in? Who indeed. I got better, no thanks to the redoubtable doctor.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
20th Hematite
(http://i31.tinypic.com/zwmd7s.png)
One of the lookouts saw Erib drop dead outside our gate, so we opened it to retrieve his body and Kubuk added another monster to his kill record.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/eqyyjr.png)
23rd Hematite
All but two of the wounded and all of the mad dwarves have perished. We are down to twenty-nine, and the halls are quieter than ever. Okit knows if we don't have something to be happy about there soon won't be anyone left with their senses so my plan for the coming month is to address everyone's personal requests and see if we can't hold out until help arrives. Either that, or we'll have our final days as pleasant as possible.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/34eb7li.png)
Post by: Daetrin on July 20, 2010, 09:57:07 am
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 20, 2010, 10:02:28 am
Post by: Daetrin on July 20, 2010, 10:11:53 am
Sounds great! If there's anyone with masonry, engraving, or architecture free I'll take that one.
Post by: Zathel on July 20, 2010, 10:24:06 am
This is amazing and hilarious and fully epic. Since the player list is somehow not a mile long, I'd like to add my name to it. I just have one question - which version of .31 is being used at the moment?
Welcome! We need more people to join in this tale of insanity, blood, vomit, grime, crazy megaprojects, bureaucratic madness, rampaging undead wildlife, bloodthirsty goblins and civilian killing sprees.
Post by: Robocorn on July 20, 2010, 11:31:11 am
Given that this is Battlefailed, there's a strong possibility that any dwarf I selected would be dead, insane, or lost to the void by the time my turn rolled around.
Sounds great! If there's anyone with masonry, engraving, or architecture free I'll take that one.
you're listed.
It may not surprise you to note that I randomly designated many dwarves as architects, masons, and stone detailers during the days of the slimeshooter production. If you're lucky there might be a peasant with all three skills wandering around.
Post by: Pisano on July 20, 2010, 12:43:26 pm
My track record involves almost getting everyone killed twice in a fenzy of rage. In order for this to be a good story somebody has to be successful. Even boatmurdered had that guy who caught all the mandrills and built a defensive system. Pre-riot Battlefailed had your turn which built the underground that the dwarves currently dwellin as opposed to the bone riddled necropolis above.
I think we'll be able to continue as long as there are dwarves in Swordboot, maybe they'll send us humans when they run out.
And I'm up next... as if Battlefailed wasn't already doomed. :D
Post by: Mekboy on July 20, 2010, 01:02:37 pm
I'm quite experienced with DF, but this'd be my first succession.
Also, what version are you using?
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 20, 2010, 01:12:30 pm
Welcome! I'm running 31.10 at the moment. Do you want to select a dwarf from our eminent group of survivors?
@Pisano, no worries.
Post by: Lupusater on July 20, 2010, 02:31:13 pm
Post by: Andreus on July 20, 2010, 03:16:35 pm
Post by: Oglokoog on July 20, 2010, 03:34:13 pm
Post by: Dante on July 20, 2010, 05:10:07 pm
Oo, if we're dorfing, can you name one after me? No preference other than adult.
Post by: Lucus Casius on July 20, 2010, 05:34:50 pm
Oo, if we're dorfing, can you name one after me? No preference other than adult.
Same here.
Post by: NightmareBros on July 20, 2010, 06:22:10 pm
This is so rediculous, I might just request my first dorfage, just so that I can die horribly by dodging into an ocean of slime or get stuck in the air.
Same name as my username, and if that don't work, just use 'Brudder N' as an alternate alias.
I don't have any preferance of dwarf, so sign me up for whoever is most likely to immedeatly die.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 20, 2010, 10:56:22 pm
Malachite
As tradition dictates, I met with the new mayor on the first of the new month.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/2q1ywja.png)
Yes, mister Mayor, I think we can manage that one.
4th Malachite
Two days ago I was taking a trip through Upper Battlefailed to check up on Edzul, when I came across an unsettling coffin with some very queer etchings.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/2q9wbqp.png)
It had stars and crescents and circles and whatnot, but there were eyes and letters both foreign and rote; and what looked to be dried blood set in the depressions. It was just strange. I can't tell if I'd rather put it in my new room or dump it in the magma sea. I think I'll leave it there for now.
Ah, yes, my new room. For the sake of my mental health I have moved into some very nice open quarters.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/2vkltkw.jpg)
It's quite comfortable here. The clothes of a former occupant lie scattered across the floor, and I've been using them to wipe my feet clean every night.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/28b5ffd.png)
A couple of similar rooms have been dug out nearby and will be adorned with the finest luxuries we can provide. We have the wealth, and it's worth more to us now if enjoyed and not hoarded.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/96gl78.jpg)
Meng has been fired.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/ieqy34.png)
A wounded dwarf who's struggled for breath the last fifteen weeks finally passed away. He threw a bucket at the doctor's head just before moving on, earning himself a glorious tomb I'll build when things settle down in the future.
In light of the doctor's consistent ineptitude, the previous mayor has been selected as our new physician. It's about damn time. She is highly untrained but at least she's reliable. I went to the hospital to give Meng the good news myself, but as luck would have it, he wasn't there.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/xkuk39.png)
I wish he'd just die already.
8th Malachite
This afternoon I met with some of the workers, trying see if I can provide anything to make their lives just that much easier. Like most days, this one ended with a splitting headache and the need to drink more beer than the night before.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/x43b7q.png)
Fikod is becoming confrontational with me, the person who saved him from a dead-end job as a Siege Engineer. Take it from an expert, that boy was going nowhere in a hurry. He's not even that great of a miner.
Either some hope to emulate the success of Twobeard by redefining themselves, or there is a new form of madness looming over us. I've read once that a common human reaction to stress is to alter one's personality into one more suited to its circumstances. This is not common for dwarves, as the state of our home indicates. Zan zodost geshud Nokzamungčg.
First was the peasant woman, who accosted me and said she would no longer bear my tyranny, and declared she was signing up with Ilmoran to learn masonry. "Whatever," I told her exactly.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/2nuskn4.png)
She was followed by the planter, who now goes by the name "Lucus Casius." She had some interesting requests.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/dr9fq.png)
The next day, the Babysaver introduced herself as "Oglokoog" and said she is now a male and a miner by trade. She probably got the name from one of the two coffins bearing it. The new projects could certainly use the assistance, so I've given her my blessing. We certainly have enough picks to go around.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/zve9zn.jpg)
(http://i25.tinypic.com/qodm42.png)
Finally, we have the brewer, who answers to "Nightmarebros" (night-mare-bros); who just had to put her clothes back on and make everyone feel uncomfortable.(http://i25.tinypic.com/qodm42.png)
(http://i31.tinypic.com/k3b389.jpg)
10th Malachite
Browsing the fortress records, I was impressed by Zon's list of accomplishments.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/2e16e60.png)
A few entries of my own were added, such as a note to all future overseers never to let Kubuk near the elves again. He and I had an actual conversation several hours ago, the first one we've had since the elves were massacred. He told me the elves had it coming, and that he is an enemy of the Veiled Beans, and will always be their enemy, and that whenever they come here he will attempt to injure them. That is, if the elves ever come back again, but why shouldn't they? These were not the first elves to fall at Battlefailed.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/15drrkx.png)
They know what to expect here.
16th Malachite
My attention has turned again to the two miners in their static purgatory. I just hope they have no idea of what state they're in.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/z67tu.png)
Resuming my efforts to free the Arena's captives requires siege weaponry. Today I asked our Chief Engineer Meng (how I hate that name) to craft a ballista.
(http://i25.tinypic.com/14cruz5.png)
When the founders named this place, I am sure they envisioned this moment. Somehow, with literal tons of metal at our disposal, not one of our twelve previous overseers ever put together the three measly ballista parts we happen to need right now? No ballista parts. What are we, elves?
(http://i25.tinypic.com/35a2i60.png)
Well, what about --
(http://i25.tinypic.com/xe2wpd.png)
-- oh fuck you, you know that? Why don't you just build the damn parts you need when I ask for the bloody engine?!
Here, I'll put it in writing. (http://i25.tinypic.com/1zpo1dz.png). Fools! I am surrounded by them.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2hdzl7b.png)
Before long I discovered other items we're somehow lacking, or in short supply of, so I'll be busy juggling schedules in the office for most of the month. I'm going to need some of that numbing powder.
28 Malachite
Ilmoran renewed my faith in the dwarven race by producing some beautiful furniture for the new wing. Some choice favorites have been sent to my room. Due to a fortunate lack of patients, our new doctor is decorating the new pieces with the bone hoard we have by the fort entrance. Our miners and masons are all on new projects, food and booze production is positive, and we're starting to feel cheer again. We are doing it. We are making a comeback.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2uxwqht.png)
(http://i26.tinypic.com/2nqr0b9.png)
What in the Windy...
(http://i26.tinypic.com/f5d5vo.png)(http://i32.tinypic.com/5y6qv8.png)
...Oh
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2ylmlnt.png)
So, the entire ocean is pouring into our bone yard, and it's spreading the blood and beast powder and grime all over everything in its path, and the place impossibly smells more hideous than before. It just goes to show you there's always a new low to sink to when you aren't very careful to tell the miners NOT to flood your home.
I suppose Fikod's not entirely to blame. If we're all going to die then at least I'm dying an honest dwarf: I told him to channel a bit of the shoreline so that when we fall into the ocean, we can actually have a chance at getting out instead of drowning every time. Now perhaps this was unnecessary, but if it saves lives, it saves lives! The point is, I told him to slope the shore. I did not tell him to flood the fort. I prepared a diagram of the accident to help explain my blunder to the liaison when I am forced to.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/kszcz.png)
There comes a point in every dwarf's life when they must ask of themselves, "Am I loony?" I thought on that question many times before today, but there is a difference between thinking about a question and really, truly asking it of yourself, demanding an answer. I found that point today, when I watched as the raging water transformed our entrance into a ponderous vat of filth.
What was I still doing here? I wondered. I could run away, grab one of the many suits of armor and an axe that lay unused in the arsenal and flee this awful place. They'd think I'd gone mad, no one would question it. No one would miss me that much for that long.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/w9tqn8.png)
I did arm myself, but I did not leave. I am Creiydrek Yearrings, not Creiydrek the Beardless.
Post by: Lucus Casius on July 21, 2010, 12:06:14 am
She was followed by the planter, who now goes by the name "Lucus Casius." She had some interesting requests."Yes, you heard me correctly. Rhythmic undulations."(http://i26.tinypic.com/dr9fq.png)
"But-"
"It helps the crops, you see."
"You didn't let me-"
"Spreads out nutrients in the soil rather well."
"Why cha-"
"Their droppings also serve as good fertilizer, and help to ensure that the harvest is always excellent."
"You know what? I'll go talk to the other workers now."
***
Yep, my dwarf is serious about her job here. Yes, farmers sound like strange, strange people.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 21, 2010, 01:12:48 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: Zathel on July 21, 2010, 02:39:00 am
Just remember about the aquifer. Dig near the ocean shore.
Post by: Oglokoog on July 21, 2010, 03:23:57 am
Post by: Dante on July 21, 2010, 04:19:58 am
16th Malachite
My attention has turned again to the two miners in their static purgatory. I just hope they have no idea of what state they're in.(http://i28.tinypic.com/z67tu.png)
Resuming my efforts to free the Arena's captives requires siege weaponry. Today I asked our Chief Engineer Meng (how I hate that name) to craft a ballista.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/33uve4g.png)
Post by: Twobeard on July 21, 2010, 06:40:14 am
on a side note i think you dwarves might enjoy listening to tunes about why beards are so damn great. An Australian band called the Beards. Enjoy!
http://www.myspace.com/thebeardsclub
Post by: Andreus on July 21, 2010, 12:48:59 pm
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/led_shakeoars.png)
... is a human. Apparently this was already known, though.
I was just looking into the legends of Battlefailed, trying to do a cultural and historical analysis of the world in which our wonderful and terrible fortress dwells, and I found this. The royal dynasty that began with Bim Quakewaned before recorded history ruled for more than four hundred and thirty years, but tragically, Thob Coastalguilds, the last dwarven king of Dastot Cog, outlived both his heirs and died childless, the royal bloodline spent. A human great house led by Minkot Hammerweights seized the throne, and Minkot ruled until her death in 471, when rulership of the land passed to her only daughter, Led Shakeoars.
It appears that the Sword of Boots acquired many human members after the conquest of several dark towers belonging to the barbarian nation of The Doom of Innocence, once run by goblins, now long overrun by elves, dwarves and humans that had been raised to know nothing but violence and hatred. Apparently one of the human bloodlines had enough wherewithal and political clout to rise to the very top.
This sure does explain a few things - such as her undying hatred for dwarves. She must have a long-standing grudge against dwarves for what their civilization did to hers.
Post by: NightmareBros on July 21, 2010, 12:54:16 pm
Time to assasinate the queen.
Can we make it so?
Also, I just now noticed my dwarf is the only fully clothed dwarf in the entire fort.
An unthinkable breakthrough considering the state of Battlefailed.
Post by: Andreus on July 21, 2010, 01:57:50 pm
Post by: Robocorn on July 21, 2010, 03:31:17 pm
Post by: Andreus on July 21, 2010, 04:28:59 pm
On a somewhat related note, my modded werewolf civilization tends to do very odd things as regards their societies - I set it so that their version of the succession of the king (the "alpha (fe)male") progresses either from viable heirs or from their second in command (the "beta"). Betas are, incidentally, the werewolf equivalent of generals, and so they lead armies into battle - of which the werewolves tend to have a lot, mostly declared by the werewolves on other societies over the displaying of war trophies. I don't know if this is intentional coding on Toady's part or just an odd and hilarious quirk of the game, but I've noticed that almost ALL the premature heir deaths that end an alpha bloodline tend to occur in battles led by the beta who later ascends to the kingdom's throne.
On an entirely unrelated note, I'm trying to work out how to make the werewolves more resistant to damage since they seem to be a bit flimsy right now (or at least, not that much sturdier in comparison to the other races) but I haven't hit upon any ideas yet.
Post by: Eric Blank on July 21, 2010, 06:00:45 pm
Post by: Oglokoog on July 22, 2010, 12:02:32 am
Especially as the new mayor is called Twobeard. No greater name for dwarf or man could be devised.
Threebeard.
Post by: antymattar on July 22, 2010, 01:03:06 am
Post by: Lucus Casius on July 22, 2010, 01:12:46 am
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 22, 2010, 05:34:07 am
Galena
I met eyes with one of the goblins we kept in a cage by the entrance, knowing he'd soon be submerged in the vile water. The goblin was laughing. Fikod and I speedily assessed the situation.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/bgcvo4.png)
(http://i26.tinypic.com/3326ia0.jpg)
(http://i26.tinypic.com/3326ia0.jpg)
(http://i31.tinypic.com/35i0hvq.png)
This might not be so terrible after all. I've rushed Fikod over to the stockpile to grab a few
(http://i26.tinypic.com/i57v3m.png)
This fort deserves to drown along with everyone in it.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/2rmb2o0.jpg)
Oddam/Oglokoog/Whatever-Their-Name-Is managed to put up the final wall seconds before it was too late. We couldn't build exactly where I wanted to because somebody had indulged in far too much of the numbing dust for his own well-being and collapsed in the middle of the hall. The former doctor, of course. How can a single dwarf be so frowningly pathetic? Even writing his name draws my ire.
2nd Galena
The consequences of the flood weren't as damning as one might figure (I am staggered that we're still alive). Due to some brilliant design choices by one of the former overseers, Lower Battlefailed should be entirely unaffected by the disaster.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/noadr6.png)
On the other hand, Upper Battlefailed is ruined. No one went in there much, so it's unlikely to be missed, but we had many valuable things stored down there. Such as all of our metal. All of it. Somehow. I'll need to speak with the miners and resume metal extraction. We also have to abandon the new wing before we even got a chance to enjoy it. Matuin's hard work and sacrifice have been entirely in vain. In the meanwhile, a new entryway to Lower Battlefailed has been carved.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2dudro.png)
I didn't see it take place, but our new doctor actually healed both the comatose children. She still has no idea what she is doing, but for whatever reason, fortune has smiled on both her and those two lads. We're all caught up in a rare spirit of celebration. Meng (the Engineer, not the Incompetent) has taken all the children outside to give them something constructive to do. It's good for them to be busy, and maybe they'll learn a thing or two in the process.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/28l782f.png)
(http://i29.tinypic.com/2uiumi0.png)
I don't believe this. Cerol was killed when part of the wall fell on top of him. How is it that everyone named Meng in this fort is a complete imbecile? He's cut off from booze for three months, and barred from being alone with the children ever again. This terrible and completely preventable incident shames all of us.
8th Galena
After some careful experimentation, I found out what the levers in front of the Arena operated.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/5p4yfl.png)
(http://i32.tinypic.com/xonxg7.png)
(http://i30.tinypic.com/2vc6blh.png)
(http://i26.tinypic.com/2uiwww7.png)(http://i28.tinypic.com/2wciq08.png)(http://i32.tinypic.com/30c4utc.png)
(http://i32.tinypic.com/xonxg7.png)
(http://i30.tinypic.com/2vc6blh.png)
(http://i26.tinypic.com/2uiwww7.png)(http://i28.tinypic.com/2wciq08.png)(http://i32.tinypic.com/30c4utc.png)
As the lever was pulled, the shuttling of a cage was heard. The bookkeeper was immediately set upon by a skorse that charged out of the arena and across the room toward him. The Swordsmaster Zon attempted to save him, but only succeeded in turning the beasts ire upon himself. I was about to unsheathe my blade when I saw Kubuk flash across the room like a steel-clad lightning bolt.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/2mg2ipj.png)
A goblin who had been seriously beaten under our care took advantage of the prevailing chaos to make a daring escape.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/10ymold.png)
Having no idea where to run, the creature fled into the caves...
(http://i31.tinypic.com/27wsrpx.png)
...pursued...
(http://i27.tinypic.com/4v4fah.png)
...and lost...
(http://i29.tinypic.com/sgsjo0.png)
..by our valiant soldiers.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/29z3oeo.png)(http://i28.tinypic.com/5a1c07.png)
The Swordsmaster has made sport of hunting it. Without a weapon the pathetic goblin's no threat to anyone. He'll probably be eaten by some creature of the depths before Zon ever finds him. I should thank the escapee for revealing that our entire fortress is widely exposed to the underground labyrinth. If I thought the dwarf responsible for that still lived, I would have them executed.
22nd Galena
(http://i32.tinypic.com/2e5nu6d.png)
More buzzards have been spotted recently. The guards are carefully watching for any sign of attack. Ilmoran continues to work on new furnishings while our pariah of a Chief Engineer has been building my ballista parts.
(http://i25.tinypic.com/cma9t.png)
Frankly, journal, I've been feeling pretty good lately, despite all our mishaps and mayhem. Those of us who survive now enjoy hope, comfort, and relative safety. The flood may even turn out to be a blessing in disguise, since it has made Battefailed more secure than ever. And, I adore my sword. I'm trying to think of a name for it.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/30204mr.png)
I haven't abandoned the two lost souls in the Arena, but I'm still waiting on those ballista parts. I hope this plan works, because if it doesn't, we're moving on to water, then magma.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
24th Galena
Several human traders have been sighted in the distance, and I'm glad to receive our tall neighbors. Fikod was asked to open the gate and allow them entry while I traveled up to the surface to welcome our guests. Hopefully they've brought some metal here.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/m97kg4.png)
(http://i26.tinypic.com/w9ej29.jpg)
(http://i32.tinypic.com/v5j1qb.png)
(http://i31.tinypic.com/v3ov90.png)
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(http://i29.tinypic.com/aaui5v.png)
(http://i31.tinypic.com/fn95b7.png)
(http://i32.tinypic.com/2w6wky8.png)
(http://i32.tinypic.com/v5j1qb.png)
(http://i31.tinypic.com/v3ov90.png)
(http://i27.tinypic.com/e0mt6d.png)
(http://i29.tinypic.com/wufnnd.png)
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(http://i29.tinypic.com/aaui5v.png)
(http://i31.tinypic.com/fn95b7.png)
(http://i32.tinypic.com/2w6wky8.png)
28th Galena
(http://i32.tinypic.com/22hvft.png)
Post by: Zathel on July 22, 2010, 07:34:15 am
Goodness gracious.
Also, I've got to ask. Why was metal stored in upper Battlefailed? I clearly remember setting a huge pile of ore, coal and marble right by magma metalworks during my term. Whatever happened to it?
Post by: NightmareBros on July 22, 2010, 09:05:51 am
A caravan comes along - a human one, no less - and gets torn apart by the combination of shelk, a forgotten beast and a golbin siege.
pray that the beast takes a liking for goblin meat.
Post by: Pisano on July 22, 2010, 10:17:35 am
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 22, 2010, 04:15:06 pm
The death of the child isn't too much of a mystery; I ordered the wall broken down and didn't notice the bit of land I was separating from support. :-\
Zathel, I discovered this:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I must have clipped them accidentally when I was mass-forbidding the Upper fort. This means we're not as neutered as I thought.
Post by: Zathel on July 23, 2010, 01:19:56 am
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 23, 2010, 01:24:45 am
I managed to catch Fikod just before he pulled the lever to open the gate. With a yelp, I ran down to him with my sword held aloft. He looked at me in terror, raising his pick defensively (can't blame the lad) but I steered toward the control mechanism and smashed it with the blade, rendering the lever inoperable. It will not be repaired until proper security measures are put in place.
The miner looked incredibly worried, so I breathlessly explained the situation. First, as I watched from our lookout post above the fortress walls, I noticed a strange heliotrope mass emerge from the bubbling Blueness. The creature let out a loud screech and tore off toward the hapless traders with unbelievable speed. It was on them in moments, tearing the arm from a guard and stampeding him down. It was then when I saw a few goblins appear at the top of the hill marking the edge of our territory. Then a few more goblins appeared, and a few more, until there were about sixty goblins, some mounted on beasts of war, declaring themselves with their battle drums.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/34edqtk.png)
No doubt our attackers came here for Battlefailed, but the humans fighting the titan drew their attention quickly enough. Before long the local undead were attracted by so much commotion and threw themselves into the fray. It didn't take long for all the humans to die. The giant purple arachnid (I call it Pado) was overrun in the end, covered and rendered to greasy dust by the swarm of invaders. The goblins were clearly victorious. It's truly regrettable we could do nothing to prevent those innocent deaths, but I won't risk our lives or limbs at this critical time. Nonetheless, the event has so troubled me, I've been taking too much of the numbing stuff as of late.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/anft3n.png)
15th Limestone
The month has been busy enough for three times our number. We've been smoothing down the stone of our most frequented areas. I have Meng slaughtering some of our animals since we have far too many and it's one of the only things he does well. I have every dwarf producing various items the fortress needs, to be stockpiled until ready. It's my hope that future rulers will be free to worry about things other than whether or not we have any ballista parts. Fortunately, a huge metal stockpile was discovered in the forge room, our prayers being answered by a previous overseer who'd been smart enough to realize we'd need it. I must learn this dwarf's name and build them a platinum tomb.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/20gfeox.png)
Since so many of our dwarves have a fondness for the True Metal, we've started planning for adamantine extraction.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/2qrzntt.png)
We don't need much of the empyreal ore for so few of us, just enough to fashion a few garments and blades and pieces of armor, so I've told the miners to only dig very little for now. Unfortunately, there have been a few delays.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/9kcw9u.png)
(http://i30.tinypic.com/qretk0.png)
Thank the stone, the magma hasn't gone anywhere it can kill us.
Meng will be turned into a useful dwarf yet or my name isn't Creiydrek. I've come to pity the bastard more than I dislike him so I'm trying to teach him to be a mechanic. At my request he's actually presented to me a plan for cutting off the endless flow of seawater filling our home.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/34gt35i.png)
I just hope it works unlike everything else I've tried to do here. I once commented during our days of success that our fortress' name was ironic. Fate seems to embrace sincerity.
Our two wounded dwarves died of thirst, our only drinking water having somehow been tainted.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/2j0lh8x.png)
(http://i29.tinypic.com/6r79xj.png)
(http://i29.tinypic.com/6r79xj.png)
Limestone 28
(http://i26.tinypic.com/f2am9.png)
Our besiegers are still out there, camped on the killing field as if waiting for us to open the gate. They probably expected a fight from us; they cannot know we've lost three quarters of the population since last they came. I hope they give up and go home before the caravan from Dastot Cog arrives. From the lookout post, I've been watching the leader of the invaders, a larger greyskin mounted on top of a Rutherer, and his three personal guards.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/2zg6qs1.png)
They've engaged in the worthy task of cleansing the land of our undead problem. Moreover, they seem to be succeeding. Goblins may be filthy brutes, but they apparently have their uses.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/2ufu7m0.png)
(http://i25.tinypic.com/351y35y.png)
(http://i26.tinypic.com/2cxi07n.png)
(http://i25.tinypic.com/351y35y.png)
(http://i26.tinypic.com/2cxi07n.png)
No skeletal elk on the plain today. Just plain, regular elk. I showed them to Edzul today, she'd never seen one before.
(http://i25.tinypic.com/svmfip.png)
In the coming month we should meet the Dwarven caravan, assuming our unwelcome visitors have left our doorstep by then. I hope they decide to go soon, because we have a dire shortage of lumber and it's been holding up my attempts to rescue the forsaken miners.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/wloutl.png)
Our hope is that the traders make it here safely, that we may unload on them our growing pile of junk, now that our hoard has come to resemble a garbage dump of tattered clothes and barrels stuffed with reeking animal fat.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/2wf1rhi.png)
I turn eighty in a few months. The big eight-oh. Just what I need right now -- middle-age. As if this job wasn't giving me enough gray hair already.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/2vxqhl3.jpg)
(http://i29.tinypic.com/2upcx2b.png)
(http://i29.tinypic.com/4gluzo.png)
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(http://i29.tinypic.com/34eqd6s.png)
(http://i27.tinypic.com/28b5oya.png)
(http://i28.tinypic.com/2ryhi74.png)
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(http://i29.tinypic.com/2upcx2b.png)
(http://i29.tinypic.com/4gluzo.png)
(http://i26.tinypic.com/jrzqeh.png)
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(http://i27.tinypic.com/28b5oya.png)
(http://i28.tinypic.com/2ryhi74.png)
(http://i28.tinypic.com/333vaxt.png)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: Eric Blank on July 23, 2010, 01:44:14 am
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 23, 2010, 02:02:57 am
Edit: I've unpaused. The FPS hit is sizable, but not as bad as I worried. It's pretty good, actually, if you consider the ocean is still pouring into the fort with a massive goblin siege outside.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: Zathel on July 23, 2010, 02:14:56 am
Or, if you are feeling brave, we can flood hell. Using the same reservoir pump stack I mentioned earlier.
Post by: Andreus on July 23, 2010, 02:24:09 am
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 23, 2010, 03:30:05 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 23, 2010, 04:01:50 am
(http://i26.tinypic.com/2cs6vyg.png)
waning keeper
(http://i32.tinypic.com/1zug5h.png)
larval pain
(http://i31.tinypic.com/8vsr5v.png)
guiding ritual
(http://i32.tinypic.com/30sg9jc.png)
seizing external
(http://i28.tinypic.com/t5n2qc.png)
shadow lantern
(http://i30.tinypic.com/2d14e4l.png)
world sunset
(http://i31.tinypic.com/2cd7rww.png)
run yearrings
(http://i32.tinypic.com/vrggwn.png)
pitiless hunters
(http://i27.tinypic.com/11s2h6c.png)
inadequate might
(http://i31.tinypic.com/20a494y.png)
sloughed out
(http://i25.tinypic.com/5yb2wj.png)
endearing shouts
(http://i29.tinypic.com/2ngymw3.png)
endless duel
(http://i28.tinypic.com/2ebuxjq.png)
infinite light
(http://i29.tinypic.com/v6hn2b.png)
mildewed survivors
(http://i32.tinypic.com/2yyqzvn.png)
!!!!!
.....
(http://i32.tinypic.com/2iibw9s.png)
(http://i31.tinypic.com/8vsr5v.png)
(http://i32.tinypic.com/rvcxsx.png)
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Dear Journal,
We have ceased adamantine extraction before it even started. I don't feel like explaining right now.
Post by: Dante on July 23, 2010, 04:47:54 am
Well, Leesin and Dante are serving that role in an even more esoteric sense. They can't be killed. They can't be harmed. They can't even be attacked or targeted for attack. Even when all the other dwarves are dead, the game will continue, letting you watch Battlefailed the Demon Fortress unfold, as wave after wave of migrants, sieges, and caravans get torn apart by the restless damned because of the two lost souls.
Dante and Leesin once again plummeting to the rescue!
Post by: Andreus on July 23, 2010, 04:54:04 am
1. Building a pillar underneath them, subsequently deconstructing it
2. Building a support with a floor on top of it underneath them, subsequently collapsing it
3. Collapsing something above them
4. Building a pillar INSIDE them, subsequently deconstructing it
5. Building a pillar inside them, subsequently collapsing it
6. Creating a large area of floor around them, releasing some sort of horrible beast to kill them (surely having them dead is at least more merciful than leaving them in this state of perpetual imprisonment)
7. Creating a large area of floor around them, flooding with water
8. Creating a large area of floor around them, flooding with magma
9. Creating a large area of floor around them, collapsing entire roof upon it
10. Setting up some form of trap beneath them
Post by: Dante on July 23, 2010, 05:19:15 am
Spoiler: game/plot spoilers (click to show/hide)
Post by: NightmareBros on July 23, 2010, 05:26:52 am
If you have to, you can do the playthough from their perspective - watching this horror unfold like some big, twisited lovecraftian plot that fate decided for them.
Also I like how my dorf was nowhere near the adamintine vien. Do you think my dorf actually has survivale skills, and perhaps the biggest dose of common sence in the fort, and so took a job that would be less likley to get me killed?
Post by: Zathel on July 23, 2010, 07:18:22 am
Also, the depth of that vein until the breach to hell was decided upon world creation. No use in mining out that one besides the topmost levels (using the obsidianizing method I mentioned)
Post by: Oglokoog on July 23, 2010, 07:18:38 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: melkorp on July 23, 2010, 08:25:46 am
Next week, Shade Brute passes out in the hot blood tub while Ash Wraith gets caught shoplifting!
Post by: Pisano on July 23, 2010, 10:54:14 am
We the undersigned do hereby petition to the current and future overseers that the ghostly miners Dante Edemkezat a.k.a. Dante Keydanger and that other guy, be left unmolested to continue their vigil over Battlefailed.
Signed by:
Pisano
Lucus Casius
Lupusater
Eric Blank
---
I'll update this post with anyone else who wants to be part of the petition. :)
Post by: Lucus Casius on July 23, 2010, 11:35:29 am
I'll sign. In obnoxiously large handwriting.
I'll update this post with anyone else who wants to be part of the petition. :)
Post by: Lupusater on July 23, 2010, 11:49:10 am
Post by: Eric Blank on July 23, 2010, 11:56:39 am
Post by: Zathel on July 23, 2010, 01:04:18 pm
Post by: Oglokoog on July 23, 2010, 01:49:16 pm
We gotta free them. That one guy has a fey mood! We need artifacts people! At all costs! It's the dwarven way!No. They're bugged, I think they can't even be killed, much less freed now.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 23, 2010, 02:07:30 pm
The fey mood is the only thing keeping Dante content, I believe. The other floater, Leesin, is miserable.
I want to thank whoever hotkey'd the F5 "Adamantine" shortcut over the tunnel to Hell. Nicely done.
Post by: Zathel on July 23, 2010, 04:36:57 pm
I want to thank whoever hotkey'd the F5 "Adamantine" shortcut over the tunnel to Hell. Nicely done.
I don't know why, but I always thought you did that.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 23, 2010, 07:28:08 pm
Edit: Do want artifacts. Permission to try and
Edit 2: Gonna try to save him first.
Post by: Pisano on July 23, 2010, 08:18:40 pm
Maybe I did? I really don't remember. I did make a whole bunch of zoom points of questionable utility.Ok, ok, I had forgotten that Dante was in a fey mood. Consider the petition withdrawn, at least for my part. Do your worst.
Edit: We do want artifacts. Permission to try and kill at least Dante? :)
Pisano
Post by: Lucus Casius on July 23, 2010, 08:23:54 pm
Personally? I say "go for it." In character, though, I say "stop it, you heartless fiend" or something to that effect.
... :(
Post by: NightmareBros on July 24, 2010, 09:54:34 am
Post by: Oglokoog on July 24, 2010, 04:46:56 pm
I'm pretty sure that during the construction, something odd would happen again and they would be freed, which would somehow negate the point... whatever.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 24, 2010, 09:38:05 pm
Sandstone
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Seeing everyone you know torn apart by unfathomable monsters can have a rescinding effect on decisions you've made, even if only in dreams. As if to confirm my hunch of ill omen, some odd noises can been heard from the other side of the floodgate over our tree farm, as if there's a great beast rattling around in the muck, splashing it against the door...
(http://i32.tinypic.com/117gxnb.png)
...while the ocean continues to stream into Upper Battlefailed.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/2501dtw.png)
(http://i25.tinypic.com/r8z6s9.png)
(http://i25.tinypic.com/r8z6s9.png)
We'll need to do something about that soon.
7th Sandstone
(http://i26.tinypic.com/2drv342.png)
Today I took Edzul with me on my trip to the hospital. I spent some time with Meng Groupwounds, who is there nursing a concussion and a broken foot. We spoke for a while and he appears to be doing poorly; he insists we call him Pisano from now on and claims he doesn't remember how his negligence killed two of the children. If he thinks a new name will help us forget, he's mistaken.
He punctuated the entire conversation with compliments for the drowning dwarf statues. Soon as we're able I'm changing the decor around here.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/15wgbxt.png)
I'll respect his decision to resign as Chief Engineer without any complaint. He wants to follow Ilmoran like Daetrin is and became an apprentice under him. I can take over his former duties while he follows his dream. My new projects need builders anyway.
9th Sandstone
(http://i27.tinypic.com/xl066f.png)
Every day as I walk to my bedroom I have to look at that cursed Arena and marvel at the plight of our unreachable comrades, and today I have had enough of it. I am going over there to try and put them out of their misery.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2zdokk2.png)
Pisano dramatically shouted into the Arena bearing a petition signed by over a quarter of the fort. It seems they want me to abandon efforts to free Leesin and Dante from their torment and have denounced me as a "heartless fiend" among other things.
Heartless? Have they no idea of the pain I am trying to ease? Not that I do, but if I were in their state I'd want someone to try and kill me. I'm happy to put that in ink.
Rather than risk another fort-wide tantrum I've agreed to hold off on my attempts for now. In public. In private I've doubled my efforts. To provide a fun activity for us we've started engraving the stone once more. Nothing too outlandish was imaged so far.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/33tl53q.png)
(http://i32.tinypic.com/2igdh7l.png)
(http://i32.tinypic.com/2igdh7l.png)
14th Sandstone
(http://i29.tinypic.com/ielel1.png)
Every day Ilmoran provides a new assortment of truly breathtaking statues, doors and other furnishings. He's begun to fashion us dedicated pieces as well. I don't know what we'd do without him and his craft to liven this place up.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/2qmitsz.png)
We've started turning this place into a home to really be proud of. With the plan for the added wing out of the picture I've focused on expanding our main hall and making it as beautiful as possible. If we cannot live somewhere nice we can at least make it look like we do.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/301k2ac.png)
21st Sandstone
I've given Kubuk the unpleasant duty of tidying up the front entrance so we can build a proper series of weapon traps there. This is for his elf slaughter, and he'll be locked outside with food and liquor until he's made some headway.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/351isyu.png)
In fact, I can hear him yelling down to us now. I should go and see what's bothering him.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/i3s96a.png)
(http://i31.tinypic.com/wrb1xu.png)
24th Sandstone
More goblins have come, the year's first siege not even ending before the second one began.
Spoiler: list of enemies (click to show/hide)
Post by: Eric Blank on July 25, 2010, 12:06:34 am
In 40d16, my barely trained militia, using all available weapons, defeated several goblin sieges of this size with barely any casualties. The new versions' difficulties in combating the goblins is somewhat of a mixed blessing. On one hand, it's more realistic and less rediculous, on the other, it's almost impossible for any size militia of any average skill level to properly defend even a well-designed fortress, assuming you don't pull the lever and lock everything out.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 25, 2010, 12:44:44 am
I turn eighty today, but I feel over two-hundred.
I didn't expect anyone to notice, but children can be so kind when they're happy and well-fed. It may only be the festivities but I'm starting to feel a shade of joy once again. The doctor gave me a fine mechanism for the occasion.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/2ez1q8n.png)
(http://i30.tinypic.com/10mug5t.png)
Our foul-smelling friends are still outside, and they were heartily greeted in the traditional manner by the local fauna.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/vf8gpi.png)
Troll blood is oddly pretty. Otherwise, there's been no interruption from them.
4th Timber
The awful statues in the hospital have been replaced with something more uplifting and inspirational to the dwarven soul, with the bonus of being far less depressing in general.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/s2un3k.png)
8th Timber
Yesterday I tried once again to emancipate Leesin and Dante.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/14o1xq8.png) (http://i26.tinypic.com/30k508x.png)
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2ujmaet.png) (http://i31.tinypic.com/fp595d.png)
(http://i28.tinypic.com/315g3yv.png)
(http://i29.tinypic.com/x3x3rq.png)
(http://i29.tinypic.com/rm61yf.png)
(http://i25.tinypic.com/25qgqkw.png)
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2ujmaet.png) (http://i31.tinypic.com/fp595d.png)
(http://i28.tinypic.com/315g3yv.png)
(http://i29.tinypic.com/x3x3rq.png)
(http://i29.tinypic.com/rm61yf.png)
(http://i25.tinypic.com/25qgqkw.png)
The Babysaver was killed when she was caught in an updraft of dust from the cave-in and plummeted into the arena, smacking hard into the stone floor. I'll miss her. Or him. I don't know anymore.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/mimgqo.png)
The miners, of course, are exactly the same. I give up. There's no point in trying to save lives by endangering those of others. I feel terrible.
14th Timber
Meng and I went to the surface together to trigger the supports holding our massive leak-stoppers.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/ofx54j.png)
You can guess how that turned out.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/2lbjixl.png) (http://i28.tinypic.com/jso8b5.png)
The walls just crumbled to dust as soon as they broke through the ground. I wonder what would happen if we tried using metal instead. Unfortunately we haven't the time, because the holes left in the shore by our experiment have given me an idea, which was immediately put in production. I'm going to take a nice bath in the filthy ocean while I ponder it.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/2lu6vpi.png)
21st Timber
This month has been three long weeks of disappointment, but we hope to turn things around by fully moving ahead with our work to make Battlefailed beautiful. If anyone ever comes here again I want their first thoughts of the fortress to be as pleasant as possible and not, well...
(http://i29.tinypic.com/69gmqg.png)
...sad. That's why we've started really spiffing the place up. When we're finished here we shall rival the Mountainhomes in splendor and GraspedSeduce will look like the dunghole it is in comparison. Yes, I am probably kidding myself, but that's not ever stopped me before.
28th Timber
Work continues on renovation. We must maximize our usable space
(http://i26.tinypic.com/214p5p0.png) (http://i28.tinypic.com/14ca811.png)
and refashion a few paths here and there. I am pleased with our progress so far.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/260e3di.png)
Winter has come. The caravan never arrived. We are forsaken.
* * *
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 25, 2010, 02:08:40 am
When I took control of Battlefailed I was enticed by the prospect of power and fame, and the prestige of having picked up the pieces of Battlefailed's fall. Some time between the flood and the dozens of deaths that occurred on my watch, it became less of a concern. Now that, for all our troubles, we are at last emerging from the dark that's engulfed us all year, I find I don't want this position at all. I remain at my station only because I have sworn to. There will be no prestige, no recognition, because the caravan has not come and I fear that it's never going to. That said, such things have long ceased to be my motivation.
At first I had figured on maintaining my position well into the coming years, but when Winter is over I will bow to tradition with masked relief, because one year of this work is enough for any dwarf's lifetime.
Let's see, what happened today? I met with the mayor, who agreed that adamantine extraction was an unwise idea at this time.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/jtpgno.png)
I checked out the new dining room furnishings that were completed late last night.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/34g0nle.png)
That's about it, except that the doctor died during a suspicious roof collapse I believe was intended to kill me.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2vjwroj.png)
(http://i32.tinypic.com/34yviav.png)
(http://i32.tinypic.com/34yviav.png)
I only narrowly escaped the doctor's fate, the worst of the rubble glancing off my armor. The Bronze Ages are investigating.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/20h3mtz.png)
14th Moonstone
While renovations and new building projects are underway, I took a trip up to look at the goblins from afar. They're still having daily skirmishes with the undead.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/28swjed.png)
Yet unless my eyes are too sun-struck to see, they appear to be herding and tending some livestock that isn't decayed. I'm thrilled that they're feeling at home. My hopes that the goblins would leave have dissolved like a pillar of salt in the sea.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/25pixys.png)
21st Moonstone
Because we are all tired of wondering each night if a goblin will escape from its cage and cut our throats while we sleep, we've started executing our prisoners in the Accursed Arena.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/ngc6df.png)
The first was a Goblin Hammerlord that Zon dispatched with ease.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/245isfm.png)
We let our captives keep their equipment as they were thrown into battle. We wanted them to have a fighting chance, after all -- we're not barbarians.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2n7ifj9.png)
(http://i27.tinypic.com/smzj7n.png)
(http://i27.tinypic.com/smzj7n.png)
I was there, only to lend Zon a hand if the need should arise. I'm no stranger to fighting but I'm also no cold-blooded killer.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/2nso287.png)
(http://i29.tinypic.com/xllzs0.png)
(http://i29.tinypic.com/xllzs0.png)
We were sure to clean up after the messy work was over.
(http://i31.tinypic.com/wk6az8.png)
Post by: Andreus on July 25, 2010, 02:24:47 am
I'd like the last turn.
When we finally decide to end Battlefailed, seeing as I've been set up as some sort of cosmic supervillain, I want to be the one that does it. I'd like to be the one that brings it all crashing down for good.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 25, 2010, 03:34:07 am
(http://i25.tinypic.com/a3clqt.png)
More stinkers arrived on the field. Let them come. Their doom is already at hand.
(http://i26.tinypic.com/14e9es9.png)
Yes, their doom. In fact, they've gathered by our front gate - the perfect spot for them to gather.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/qyv13s.png)
The bridge and the lever are only a diversion for that we've really been after.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/33usbdg.png)
I call it FAILCANNON. When it's completed we'll make the goblins rue the day they came to Battlefailed.
For it's completion I've drafted every able bodied dwarf, and Meng. His job is to draw the goblin's attention so our workers can build without being shot at.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/2mfi6fl.png)
He's doing great, bless his soul. He still lives so I tried to convince Ilmoran to make a tribute of the shooting to put in my room. He said he'd think about it.
28th Opal
It's been a slow but busy month.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/2pql2zm.png)
If you enjoy skeletons, then we have a terrific, outrageous palace of a home, and no one to share it with. I didn't realize the vast halls would feel so empty with just the twenty-three of us. I've been feeling anxious lately so I've taken it out on the prisoners for my continued good health. Remember lads, it's not murder if they're armed.
(http://i25.tinypic.com/21nmgd3.png)
(http://i31.tinypic.com/21d03n4.png)
(http://i32.tinypic.com/zbcz6.png)
(http://i31.tinypic.com/21d03n4.png)
(http://i32.tinypic.com/zbcz6.png)
The Bronze Ages have started calling me "the Granite Strikes of Foot." I rather like that.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/2nq2vt.png)
It may be lonely, but we at least have tranquility, food, drink, decent company, and the lack of any real need to do work. Once all the clean-up was finished, we realized how many supplies Battlefailed actually had, and being so few dwarves in a fortress meant for so many means we don't have to produce anything of our own for a very, very long time.
From here on out it's the good life.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: Robocorn on July 25, 2010, 04:19:47 am
Oh, happy day!
I don't know how you do it Creiyd, You've taken an unspeakably long turn and managed to keep it up to our usual standards of epic throughout the whole thing. This is the kind of thing legends are made of.
I've got a request.
I'd like the last turn.
When we finally decide to end Battlefailed, seeing as I've been set up as some sort of cosmic supervillain, I want to be the one that does it. I'd like to be the one that brings it all crashing down for good.
I can't really imagine ending Battlefailed on our own volition. We've survived two tantrum spirals, multiple massive floods, and three simultaneous invasions with no help from the mountainhomes. The central theme of the fort has been persevering over ridiculously stacked odds.
However, if we ever reach a state of gamespeed that borders on stagnation and prevents the story from continuing (I'm not talking 15 or even 8, I'm talking 2) Then I'll hand over the save to you so you can coup de grāce Battlefailed in the most spectacular way you can manage at the gamespeed.
Post by: Andreus on July 25, 2010, 05:11:03 am
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 25, 2010, 05:30:04 am
Obsidian
(http://i32.tinypic.com/2guyy9u.png)
A cat was thankfully the only one to die this month.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/hwcz2u.png)
Sigun was the first to show signs of the transformation.
(http://i30.tinypic.com/2u44y1e.png)
(http://i26.tinypic.com/357nl29.png)
(http://i26.tinypic.com/r0nwo2.png)
(http://i26.tinypic.com/357nl29.png)
(http://i26.tinypic.com/r0nwo2.png)
Daetrin was the next to fall, presenting a far worse case.
(http://i27.tinypic.com/2rclhrm.png)
(http://i25.tinypic.com/ohjo2b.png)
(http://i25.tinypic.com/ohjo2b.png)
It's finally happening. We're all going to die. And we won't even stay dead, if I'm right about it.
(http://i28.tinypic.com/20pf3aw.png)
(http://i30.tinypic.com/keyis4.png)
(http://i30.tinypic.com/keyis4.png)
Slowly but surely we are turning to walking rags of necrotic flesh like those animals outside. The afflicted cannot rest, they cannot eat or drink or sleep; all they do from day to end is stare listlessly into space as their bodies drip away to the floor. There is nothing I can do for them.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/2dl3x94.png)
I put a safeguard above the hospital in case our patients lose their selves and move against us. I pray to Okit we don't have to use it.
(http://i29.tinypic.com/25anqkn.png)
I'm certain that some dark force is behind this curse, but it doesn't matter now. All we can do now is wait by ourselves for the terrible death that will certainly come.
What could we have done to deserve such a fate?
(http://i32.tinypic.com/2009xmt.png)
'Tis midnight on the morrow of Spring. Tomorrow I retire as overseer. Elections'll be held at some point. I'm going to bed now.
(http://i32.tinypic.com/262mrrn.png)
(http://i30.tinypic.com/mt3uc3.png)
1st Granite, 512(http://i30.tinypic.com/mt3uc3.png)
To the next Overseer, bless your stout heart.
I don't envy your task, but a duty's a duty and your duty's sealed. The levers (the ones I'm aware of, anyway) have been marked and labeled if their function isn't obvious from their placement. Failcannon is neither complete or operational, but it's very nearly so. Either way you'll want to use it or something else to stop the ocean from running into our fort, whenever that feels right for you.
Please fill out the proper paperwork to ensure the bedrooms beneath my office are appropriated for my and Edzul's habitation. The Overseer's Mansion has been vacated for your use. I trust you'll enjoy the view from the office. Don't pull the levers in the west end of the hoard room. Any of them.
Sincerely yours,
Creiydrek Yearrings the Granite Stomps of Foot, Former Overseer
That's it, and thanks for putting up with me taking so long. I wanted to narrate the story as it played out. It's easy to notice every little detail when the game chugs along at 10 fps. I was just barely able to save the 25 from insanity (23 after Oglokoog and the doctor died) and it took a lot of statues and bodies buried in the staircase. Once the horrible sweeping misery had left everyone I drafted them into mining and masonry and had fun. You can do a lot with two dozen dwarves who don't have anything else to do.
Sorry about the flood, I didn't mean to do that. Or the cave-ins. ::)
Right now the weapon is connected to the water-filled gaps in the fort wall, so it can be used to pump out that level (I hope) to get someone in there and put up a couple floodgates or something. To get it to work you need to deconstruct a couple floors and build two more pumps, it should be pretty intuitive. It also needs dwarf power, since those windmills and gears are useless in their current state. We've got to stop that flood, the FPS hit was negligible at first but it added up over the course of the turn. On the bright side, we have a bigger Ocean of Slime than ever before.
I agree we should let the fort live a natural life as much as we can. And, sorry Andreus. Judging by the state of the world it was in fact a cosmos-sundering error. Definitely not a hallucination or anything like that. At least I'm sure you can manifest inside another couple of dwarves before reality has a BSOD.
This was awesome, thanks for letting me take part in it. I used 31.11 starting shortly after Winter and imported the raws into the save folder. Save is here. (http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=2805)
edits: corrections
Post by: Dante on July 25, 2010, 06:18:27 am
Please fill out the proper paperwork to ensure the bedrooms beneath my office are appropriated for my and Edzul's habitation. The Overseer's Mansion have been vacated for your use. I trust you'll enjoy the view from the office. Don't pull the levers in the west end of the horde room. Any of them.
Hahahahahaha.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 25, 2010, 06:22:01 am
I'm pretty sure one of those levers lets in Osman.
Post by: Oglokoog on July 25, 2010, 06:52:02 am
Or is there a horde of some horrible creatures that you've not made us aware of?
Post by: Zathel on July 25, 2010, 07:01:08 am
Code: [Select]
OOO^xXX
OOO^xXX
ooo^xXX
^^^ ^^^
+++
+++
+++
+ - z-level 0 floor
O - z-level +1 floor, o - wall underneath
X - z-level +2 floor x - wall underneath
^ - ramp
First line of floors has to have a solid wall underneath. It has to be that way otherwise we have ourselves a pile of stones, not a stairway.
Edit: realised that schematic didn't convey what I meant. Duh.
Post by: Oglokoog on July 25, 2010, 07:05:55 am
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 25, 2010, 08:06:04 am
I always thought of 'dubious worship' as being the dwarven equivalent of atheism. Like, they don't believe in gods or the belief is irrelevant to them, but their listed god is the one they were brought up with or affiliated with in some way, even if it's just for swearing.
The stairs are okay, all the ramps should have proper backing and I only messed with a few of them.
Post by: Oglokoog on July 25, 2010, 08:29:08 am
Post by: Pisano on July 25, 2010, 10:08:34 am
edit: FAILCANNON must be referred to in all caps. :D
Post by: darkflagrance on July 25, 2010, 11:49:01 am
Also, regarding the extra-planar ghost miners: they functionally do not exist in the game, and nothing can interact with them as far as I know. The game thinks they are falling, but has forgotten to make them hit the ground (most likely due to the saving of the game, which interrupted the fall. The only way to fix this problem is to hack the game's memory, and to the best of my knowledge, Dwarf Companion was the only tool that could access the right area of the memory. I have no experience with the current hacking tools available, so I don't know if they would work.
Shame that additional blood had to be shed futilely for their sake.
Post by: Robocorn on July 25, 2010, 02:39:10 pm
So we finally find out what osman's slime does, and it's a severely delayed mass necrotic. It might be hard to watch that going down unless we used it on stationary goblins, but it was a dream. That or this is from all of that numbing dust you guys got all over you.
As for gamespeed. You can turn off weather because we don't need it. Additionally, it is almost always raining in Battlefailed (kind of appropriate in that regard actually), but I'm sure it eats up a little memory.
Post by: Pisano on July 25, 2010, 03:27:29 pm
He must be mad turning the fortress over to me. Perhaps the necrosis has spread to his brain? A fine chronicler that Creiydrek was and he also seems to have pulled us out of a nosedive, at least somewhat. Despite the warnings about the numbing and necrotizing extracts I still see some dwarves insisting that nude is the only dwarven way. I just passed Kubuk Tiristmondul in the hallway, a fine axedwarf and wood cutter, wearing nothing but his axe and covered in that slime. Go wash yourself off already it isn't like we are lacking in water though I'm not sure how many of us want to get anywhere near that briney muck that is The Blueness of Malodors. Blueness my ass, more like a brownish red as is mixes around down here.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/1status_start_of_turn.png)
There are only 23 of us left 5 of which are care children and six of us are unconscious or otherwise unable to move from the hospital. A hospital which they share with the rotting corpses and skeletons of several former patients. The note Creiydrek left on my desk contained a bit of dry dwarven wit concerning the view from the Overseer's quarters, "I trust you'll enjoy the view from the office" he said.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/4hospital.png)
Yes the hospital is in the mansion now and is smeared with blood, forgotten beast extract, sand, miasma and a few skeletons to boot. Or maybe he was talking about that masterful gem window with the view into the cavern.
After surveying some of the fortress I've come to the conclusion that we have many assets.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/3corpses_count.png)
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/2body_parts.png)
My first act as new overseer was to make sure that, despite his grim humor, Creiydrek was assigned his new quarters, complete with a lovely cow in a cage. Actually they are pretty fine quarters and now that I'm running the place I'll have to see about upgrading from my own modest quarters, but before that there are more pressing matters like this flood.
More to come when I've surveyed the landscape a bit more thoroughly and figured out what this FAILCANNON is supposed to do, it is some sort of very dwarven contraption, which, I think, will pump the water out upper and onto the field in front of the fortress to wash the blood and hopefully some of the invaders from outside of our front gate.
Post by: Oglokoog on July 25, 2010, 03:59:34 pm
Also, you (probably) have a pretty awesome machine under your command.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 25, 2010, 04:19:35 pm
Thanks for giving me my new quarters, though. And my cow. ^_^
Quote from: Toady One
# 07/25/2010: A few crash fixes, liaison replacements should work, and you should be offered a barony properly when you hit the triggers.
# 07/25/2010: Released Dwarf Fortress 0.31.12
Maybe now that liaison will actually show up. Also, one of the weapon's walls on the base level is broken.
Post by: Andreus on July 25, 2010, 08:21:24 pm
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
EDIT: Wait, are we calling it FAILCANNON now? That certainly works.
Post by: Pisano on July 26, 2010, 12:39:16 am
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/5pisano_on_break.png)
Yeah, yeah, I'll get back to work soon. Before that though I must continue surveying the fortress to try and come to grips with what must be done here. The continuous flood is the greatest concern. As such I'm putting my efforts toward the completion operation FAILCANNON.
9th Granite, 512
I'm a bit worried about our wounded. Two of our most senior soldiers Sigun and Ezum have the foot rot and can't stand up anymore.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/6sigun_wounds.png)
Meng Tholast is still on his feet, but has the foot rot as well. Daetrin has rot all over, it is a sad thing. Despite our previous overseer's instructions that everyone wear clothing many have already been infected. Dying due foot rot is an especially tragic way for the members of The Sword of Boots to go out. BOOTS wear boots, low boots, high boots, mining boots, at least some shoes!! Something please, if they are uncomfortable how about at least putting some socks on before trudging through all that forgotten beast slime?
Somehow despite the rot Sigun is quite happy. Perhaps being waited on hand and, dare I say, foot is better than the prospect of facing the dozens of goblins, trolls and other beasts that wait up top.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/7sigun_health.png)
10th Granite, 512
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/8sigun_succombs.png)
Not one day after I visited her in the hospital Sigun Hamerack, the Cremation of Dunes, has fallen to infection. One would have hoped that she could have fallen on the battlefield instead. At least she was happy to the end.
I've seen our doctor, Lucius Casius, repeatedly bathing the rot to no avail. I fear that once the rot has set in there is nothing we can do. There is just too much filth. I inspected Sigun's bed and this is the mess I found.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/9sigun_hospital_bed.png)
Sigun spent her last happy hours in a pile of forgotten beast extract and other fluids. And what was an entire bag of black sand doing in the hospital. That just can't be sanitary. And the next day...
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/10ezum-foot-rot-infection.png)
12th Granite, 512
I've halted the construction of most of the nobles rooms, they are dug out, but seeing as we have no nobles the furniture placement and smoothing will have to wait for a bit.
Daetrin has taken a turn for the worse..
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/11daetrin-is-next.png)
18th Granite, 512
Would that the doctor hadn't been right...
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/12daetrin-succombs.png)
Despite their orders nobody seems all that concerned with burying our fallen comrades or with finishing the FAILCANNON. This has not been a good month so far.
19th Granite, 512
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/13meng_succombs.png)
*sob*
To try and cheer me up Ilmoran, placed a cow in a silver cage in my new quarters. Maybe he noticed that I always bring a sugar lump to Creiydrek's cow when I'm in the area. I didn't end up taking the overseer's chambers. I took a more modest room that is still only half complete. It is a huge step up from my small cubicle, and, frankly with so few of us left we should all be living in large chambers.
25th Granite, 512
Kubuk is still walking around with nothing but his axe wearing nothing but a whole lot of ichor and secretions. Let's just say it isn't a pretty sight and leave it at that. As such I've ordered him to a new squad as an experiment. See sometimes these military types have taken one too many hammers to the noggin and they get it into their head that if they are ordered to wear nothing but steel armor and there isn't enough steel that, perhaps, it means that they shouldn't wear any normal clothing either. Not that there is anything wrong with wearing only metal armor, I mean people think it might chafe, but going dwarf commando is surprisingly comfortable. I myself am sporting nothing but iron armor and my fine bone leggings. It really lets the breeze in.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/16dwarf_commando.png)
Regardless, you gotta wear metal, or cloth, or both, but running around buck naked is a sure way to get the foot rot. I feel like these are things I shouldn't have to explain to my fellow dwarves, but sometimes being the Overseer means repeating the obvious to your colleagues. Maybe there isn't enough steel available, I'll have to ask Nightmarebros our bookkeeper the next time I see him.
28th Granite, 512
A few moments spent staring through the fortifications was all it took to see that the goblin blighters haven't gone away. They have some trolls to, but luckily none seem large or smart enough to break down our drawbridge.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/14siege_still_going.png)
The FAILCANNON is complete, but... well fail seems to be the word of the day. I mean I didn't really pass my mechanics class in school... or many others, but I just don't see how the power was ever going to get from the three windmills to the screw pumps. I think the best alternative is to tell the masons and mechanics to take apart the wind mills, and build a small windmill towers for power. The idea of using water wheels in the vile blueness, as I like to call it, is not appetizing or rather we'd likely be appetizers for whatever is lurking beneath those waves.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/15no_power_failcannong.png)
edit: just minor typo type stuff
Post by: Zathel on July 26, 2010, 02:50:41 am
Awesome.
Post by: Eric Blank on July 26, 2010, 02:58:33 am
Good job, you load of crazies :P
Post by: melkorp on July 26, 2010, 08:57:44 am
Can you confirm how dwarves contract the Plague? From walking through puddles of beast waste? Are only the barefoot at risk? Does wearing shoes prevent transmission?
Zombie Hellscape indeed!
Post by: Pisano on July 26, 2010, 11:59:17 am
So, everyone inside is afflicted with The Rot, and we can't get migrants until we clean out the gobbos?Not everyone is afflicted, more when I update, but there are at least a half a dozen adults and 3 or 4 of the children that don't have any rot last I checked. I don't really understand why, but dwarves often don't seem to clothe themselves after they've lost their clothing (I'm not even sure how/why they are losing clothes except that the military seems to wear out their clothing), even when there are lots of clothes lying around.
Sigun Hameracks! Nooo!I felt the same way about Sigun :(
Can you confirm how dwarves contract the Plague? From walking through puddles of beast waste? Are only the barefoot at risk? Does wearing shoes prevent transmission?
I don't know for sure, but SethCreiyd seemed to think that it was from one of the forgotten beast extracts. I'll try to keep an eye on the dwarves, maybe take a health survey. To be certain many dwarves have sensory nerve damage and numb feet/limbs. And many, tho fewer now due to attrition, have rotting bits and pieces. I feel like the doctor is really trying hard, but has almost no skill so dwarves aren't getting any better. All I know is that making a forgotten beast that leaves flesh eating scum behind takes a sick and twisted mind, kudos to you Tarn.
One other observation, dwarves are terrible about cleaning up blood (and forgotten beast secretions). It seems like one dead goblin/dwarf can create insane amounts of blood that is tracked all over the place. Honestly it seems a bit broken, there is only so much blood in a body and it seems like we have gallons of the stuff all over the place.
Post by: cappstv on July 26, 2010, 12:50:46 pm
If so, I sign up for this.
Post by: Zathel on July 26, 2010, 02:19:37 pm
One other observation, dwarves are terrible about cleaning up blood (and forgotten beast secretions). It seems like one dead goblin/dwarf can create insane amounts of blood that is tracked all over the place. Honestly it seems a bit broken, there is only so much blood in a body and it seems like we have gallons of the stuff all over the place.
Believe me, it was far worse in early versions of 0.31. Blood was multiplying then due to a bug. I could be virtually EVERYWHERE. In one of my forts situation got so bad I had to use a DFhack tool just to get rid of it (it was all over the 4x4 embark tile surface and plentiful on every frigging level of my expansive fortress).
Post by: Pisano on July 26, 2010, 03:50:16 pm
There are only 19 of us left. Well 19 if you count our two ghostly miners among the living. I feel that since our numbers have dwindled to so few I should do a quick medical roll call before letting everyone get back to work.
The 5 remaining children are Asmel, Obok, Urist, Edzul the Child Menace, and Likot. They are all orphans, but three are brothers. I can never keep them straight; I mean children don't have beards so they all look the same to me.
- Asmel, has numb feet but no signs of rot yet. She is in the hospital.
- Obok, has numb feet also with no signs of rot, at least not yet...
- Likot, again, has numb feet with no signs of rot.
- Urist and Edzul, healthy!
Of the 12 remaining adults these folks need medical attention:
- Dishmab the Murderer, has a minor upper body wound that has gotten infected. He was examined by Lucus about a week ago, so perhaps he will be okay. Dishmab is wearing no clothing.
- Fikod, Miner and Axe Dwarf, is wearing no clothing and has numb feet with partial paralysis. Lucus excised some rotten tissue from his left foot not 3 days ago.
- Inod, Carpenter, is lying nude in the hospital with an infection in his right leg and a right arm that needs someone to look at it.
These adults are healthy and clothed (except where noted):
- Creiydrek, Former Overseer and Engraver
- Eral, Blacksmith
- Lucus Casius, chief medical dwarf
- Nightmarebros, bookkeeper
- Kubuk, Axe Dwarf, generally wears nothing but his axe, but he recently picked up a spider silk hood that makes him look all the more ridiculous. Despite running around in the he appears to be healthy.
- Pisano, current overseer, clothed, but my feet have recently started to stiffen up like Fikod's. That might just be the result of some surgery that Creidrek did on my last Opal.
- Twobeard, our fine mayor, in ratty clothing and has a minor irritation on his lower stomach. I think he has just gotten too fat and his belt is pinching.
- Zon, Swordmaster and Militia Commander
- Ilmoran, Legendary Mason, is wearing some incredibly raggedy clothing that, honestly, looks like it is going to fall off of him any day now. I want to tell him to get some new clothing, but I'm not sure how to broach the subject.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/1ilmoran_clothing.png)
So three of the children and three of the adults need medical attention and nine who can still work though some have partial paralysis.
What this tells me is that we need a second doctor. Creidrek volunteered so I took him off of his hauling duties in hopes that we can save some of the wounded. I'm also going to see about making some soap. We must have the ingredients around here though I doubt we have anyone skilled in such a profession anymore. It should also be noted that for the most part folks who have footwear on don't have the rot.
15th Slate, 512
I've forbidden anyone from touching anything that is not a construction item outside of Battlefailed. I am all for being tidy, but we have matters more pressing that sorting out dead troll bits and goblin armor. I also formed up a new military squad, the Harmonius Anvils, whose uniform includes shoes and socks and any available metal armor. I lead this squad myself though I have no intention of ever taking us into battle.
25th Slate, 512
Some progress on the windmill towers at the top of the FAILCANNON.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/2windmill_tower_progress.png)
2nd Felsite
Hmm, are the gobbos up to something?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
It sure seems like they would have attacked log ago if they thought they could breach our defenses. They have been killing off the local fauna for the last few months, but little else.
Post by: Oglokoog on July 26, 2010, 04:32:17 pm
Post by: Daetrin on July 26, 2010, 05:10:16 pm
Given that this is Battlefailed, there's a strong possibility that any dwarf I selected would be dead, insane, or lost to the void by the time my turn rolled around.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/12daetrin-succombs.png)
Well, that was quick.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: Pisano on July 26, 2010, 05:24:31 pm
So... are bridges actually indestructible when raised? If not, then why don't we have a moat?I think they are indestructible, at least I've never seen one destroyed (I've heard that as long as you don't try to atom smash certain megabeasts they can't be destroyed, but that might not be correct) and Pisano the dwarf certainly has no idea about such things, he just thinks that stone formed by dwarf masons is well-nigh indestructible.
Daetrin had the worst case of rot I've ever seen. He must have rolled around in that slime or something.Given that this is Battlefailed, there's a strong possibility that any dwarf I selected would be dead, insane, or lost to the void by the time my turn rolled around.(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed/12daetrin-succombs.png)
Well, that was quick.
Post by: Twobeard on July 26, 2010, 06:45:40 pm
Post by: Pisano on July 26, 2010, 09:06:38 pm
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/4green_glass_mandate.png)
The mandate to not export adamantine items ended and a new mandate was issued. Perhaps Twobeards wants to see us recultivate lost skills with this one. There isnt' a dwarf among us who knows a lick about glass making. I just hope they don't burn off a limb in the magma glass furnace or something.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/5urist_party.png)
Really, we're letting a three year old organize a party? This one is a future mayoral candidate if she lives that long.
A few hours later...
I guess it wasn't that great a party. I heard later that nobody but Urist showed up. I guess we are all too busy and if you are too busy for a party with a three-year-old, well, I guess that says something about us now doesn't it?
16th Felsite
Despite my suggestion Fikod that he is on the hook for producing a green glass item, he doesn't seem all that inclined to do so. He keep muttering that he have no idea how to make glass items. I handed him an instruction manual and told him he'd could temporarily stop hauling if he got to it.
18th Felsite
They are gone! The invaders have left us.
We now have a thief stealing valuables from outside of the gate, but frankly unlesss I see a trade caravan or some migrants I'm not inclined to open the gates for anything.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/6thief.png)
23 Felsite, 512
Kobold vermin and goblins are practicing their hunting skills on the skeletal horses. Would that I had a few fine lads in tempered steel, I'd send them out to end those runty wretches.
24 Felsite, 512
Only one patient remains in the hospital, the child Obok. I think some of the others are checking themselves in periodically though still, perhaps returning on doctors orders for a check up.
Fikod finished the green glass window. Green glass is one of Twobeard's favorites so I'm going to have it installed in his office.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/7Twobeards_window.png)
edit:typos/punctuation
Post by: Pisano on July 27, 2010, 12:51:13 am
I've had to start up the booze production again. Somehow our stocks have dwindled. I can't imagine 20 or so dwarves drinking almost 500 bottles of beer in 3 months. All I can think of is that with the flood we've been cut off from a significant portion of our booze sockpile.
15th Hematite, 512
The FAILCANNON may be ready any day now. I believe one more axle is all that is necessary to start it. I've taken the precaution of hooking a couple of the gears up to The Lever of Precaution which I've placed right by the FAILCANNON.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/9failcannon_almost_ready-1.png)
19th Hematite, 512
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/8no_migrants.png)
26th Hematite, 512
The FAILCANNON is active.. and failing. There is no power to the two topmost pumps which I missed when I consulted the schematics. Shortly after the FAILCANNON started pumping I realized it was flooding the ground level. Argh! I guess gear's aren't watertight afterall. I can't believe I trusted them. These are the designs tha the so-called mechanics came up with?! Now is when that lever will come in handy, let's hope the mechanic's at least hooked that up right.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/10failcannon_fail.png)
Maybe the water will wash away some of the filth outside of the FAILCANNON at least...but if the lever doesn't work we might flood the rest of the fortress.
5th Malachite, 512
Yeah, the Lever of Precaution, my brainchild, only disabled one of the gears. One pump is still pouring water onto the ground. And despite my pleading, still nobody will remove the gear that will disable the failcannon.
7th Malachite, 512
If you want something done right you have to do it yourself....
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/11had-to-do-it-myself.png)
On the plus side we didn't flood anything and we did manage to wash away some grime from the beach.
25th Malachite, 512
After a few slight modifications to the design, mainly with how it is powered, construction on the FAILCANNON will now continue.
2nd Galena, 512
Today is my birthday. Knowing how much I like silver, and owing to the fact that we had over 150 silver bars, the boys whipped up a few silver ornaments for me and placed them all around my room. I can't believe it, it is so wonderful to have silver all over my room. Thanks guys!
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/12pisanos-rooms.png)
12th Galena, 512
Hurray, a human caravan has arrived... and an odd diplomat as well. Now if I can just find the lever to open the front gate.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/13human_caravan.png)
I know I saw it around here somewhere.
Post by: Robocorn on July 27, 2010, 01:02:37 am
I hope you get something out of these humans.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 27, 2010, 01:47:50 am
Post by: Andreus on July 27, 2010, 01:56:29 am
Wait, no, actually, I think I might have to make a sanity check if I knew the answer.
Never mind.
Post by: Zathel on July 27, 2010, 02:28:29 am
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 27, 2010, 09:27:03 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: Andreus on July 27, 2010, 10:54:05 am
It's been so long since I checked this thread and I only read the latest few updates, but wow.
Welcome back to the madhouse, brosef.
Post by: RavingManiac on July 27, 2010, 11:07:11 am
Post by: Pisano on July 27, 2010, 01:45:42 pm
I pulled the lever marked, "astonishingly this controls the front gate." And nothing happened...
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/battlefailed-3/3nice_levers.png)
Front gate lever, the one marked, "astonishingly..." I was astonished more by the fact that despite being flanked by statues in the image of dwarves it didn't seem to work.
Trade Hall gates lever, I pulled this just to see what would happen (what could possibly go wrong?) and damn if I can tell what happened. I do see two silver bridges next to the trade depot, but it looks like a wagon can get through there, both before and after I pulled this lever. I mean if the front gate were open then a wagon could get through to the trade depot.
The G.S.G.S. lever has the cryptic note: This lever controls the gates for the lever controlling the main gate. As far as I can tell there are no gates to the main gate lever and if there were you wouldn't be able to get into this room to pull this lever. Maybe the main gate and the front gate are different things?
14th Galena, 512
A ghost whispered in my ear that the main gate lever had been deconstructed. So I asked Creiydrek and he said that, as part of a beautification project, he had the lever rebuilt, but that it hadn't been hooked back up again. So I ordered that it be hooked up again. Luckily our front bridge/gate is made of rutile and we have no other rutile bridges in the whole place. This should be easy for the mechanics.
15th Galena, 512
The mechanics tell me they can't find a rutile bridge anywhere that isn't already hooked up. So we must have a lever somewhere, but where? I found the levers that control the cistern and crop irrigation.
I'm contemplating removing the bridge, rebuilding it and hooking up the front gate lever, but that would leave us vulnerable for however long it takes to construct a fine new draw bridge.
The humans dispatched a goblin thief and then were ambushed by some bowmen who they chased off.
17th Galena, 512
The front gate lever just looked so nice that I pulled it again to see if something different would happen and wouldn't you know the main gates opened! However, the humans aren't making their way to the gates. For some reason that I cannot fathom access down the remaining ramp way is blocked. Only thing I see that could be blocking are a sapling, a dead shrub or a floor grate. I don't see how any of those things could stop a wagon.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/battlefailed-3/6wagon_access_blocked.png)
19th Galena, 512
I've asked the masons to build a floor over that sapling and to seal up a breach which would allow flying beasties from the cavern to enter the fortress. Through the crack I could see Nagnod, some sort of gigantic blob of water with two stubby but undulating tails. It seemed to be hovering there so maybe it can fly but can't get through the small crack. The last thing we need right now is another forgotten beast wandering the halls.
I also ordered the construction of an trade depot up top, but inside our gates, as a temporary measure.
20th Galena, 512
The humans caravan is making its way inside, hurray! Maybe they will find their way down to the main trade depot after all?
But then, of course...
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/battlefailed-3/5ambush_curse_them.png)
Goblins are ambushing the back of the caravan. Zon had taken it upon himself to be stationed inside the gates for just such trouble. The humans guards should get there first, but Zon insisted on going to help, it is only a half a dozen or so of the foul greenskins he said. I haven't seen him look so happy in quite a long time.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/battlefailed-3/7zon_to_the_rescue.png)
Zon really enjoyed himself! Goblin limbs were sailing off left and right. He is a regular Cuisinart.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/battlefailed-3/8zon_more_slaughter.png)
21st Galena, 512
Oh, what a rousing sight! When it was all over Zon notched 5 more kills with one of the greenskins fleeing before she could catch up. The humans guards were not much help, I think when they saw Zon trundling along they just went inside with the lead wagon.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/battlefailed-3/9zon_kills.png)
22nd Galena, 512
Since we are desperately low on wood I've commissioned another tree farm up top.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/battlefailed-3/4new_tree_farm.png)
This is a long term investment however, hopefully the traders will have some wood for us.
23 Galena, 512
oh no! With the gates open and my discussion of needing wood Kubuk and Inod have taken it upon themselves to go and cut down some trees. I was certain I had rescinded all outer world wood chopper certificates (designations), but I realize now that I never had a chance to tour that hole to the north. Sure enough there were some wood chopper certificates at the bottom of a stack of paperwork I haven't gotten to. They are rescinded and properly stamped in triplicate with the diorite seal, the alabaster seal, and silver seal, but Inod and Kubuk are already on their way down.
Somehow the merchants have found their way down to the trade depot, I guess we won't be needing the temporary depot after all.
End of Galena
Kubuk and Inod made it back safely. I couldn't believe my eyes when they walked back through that gate. I also promptly ordered it shut as soon as I had word they were inside.
We're all anxiously waiting for the traders to finish unloading. The first six months of this year could have gone far far worse, other than those we lost the first month we've had no causalities. But our progress on the FAILCANNON has been mostly a failure thus far.
Autum has come...
Post by: Zathel on July 27, 2010, 02:46:48 pm
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Post by: Oglokoog on July 27, 2010, 03:12:13 pm
Also, this is going too well. I predict another enormous tragedy soon. Pray that I'm wrong.
Post by: Andreus on July 27, 2010, 03:43:38 pm
No moving! :D
Also, this is going too well. I predict another enormous tragedy soon. Pray that I'm wrong.
You know, I would accuse you of jinxing it, but actually, jinxing in Dwarf Fortress seems to work in reverse.
Post by: Pisano on July 27, 2010, 08:16:45 pm
The first round of trading went well. We managed to trade away a few rock crafts, and a lot of random bits of clothing for a pile of booze, seeds, and food that we desperately needed. I also traded for three dog cages. It seems like our dog populate was wiped out at some point in the past and I miss the little guys. I need to have a few more items moved to the trade depot before we can liberate ^H^H^Htrade for a few metal bars and maybe some more livestock.
After chasing Twobeard around for a few days the human animal dissector finally managed to get a meeting with him.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-4/1meeting_time.png)
10th Limestone, 512
The second round of trading was a success. We have obtained everything we wanted from the traders.
13th Limestone, 512
The merchants have embarked on their journey. Safe travels!
16th Limestone, 512
Twobeards met again with the strange human Ote Rorekturot. It was a long meeting but Twobeards hasn't said what they discussed. I did notice a case of whip wine, that we just traded for, is missing. That Twobeards is a sneaky guy. I can only hope that our generous trading with the humans will bring them around this way again next year.
17th Limestone, 512
Another "meeting" today. Twobeards relayed the message this time:
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-4/2humans_leaving.png)
Ugh, I opened the gates to let the trade caravan out and folks started leaving. First the blacksmith who was on break, and then two of the children decided to go on walkabout outside the gate. I tried to tell them how unsafe the place is, but after being cooped up in here for months I guess they just had to stretch their legs.
Eral has come back but now Fikod is touring the countryside and Inod declared that she was going to go out and gather some plants down in that hole to the north.. that place is a real danger. I thought I had ripped up all plant gathering certificates for areas outside of the fortress, so I don't know where she thinks she is going. Don't they know it is dangerous!
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-4/3dangers_in_the_cavern.png)
I don't really remember poor Sethrist, but Inod found his broken body, or what was left of it.
19th Limestone, 512
I've turned on the FAILCANNON again. It will work this time, really.. I mean what could possibly go wrong?
21st Limestone, 512
Rab save me! You'd think that everyone wants to leave this place or something. Inod safely made it back once again defying the odds and now Dishmab has decided to collect webs from guess where... yeah that stinking hole. I should have bricked up myself ages ago except that I have enough sense to stay inside the gates!
23rd Limestone, 512
Rab be praised! The humans are gone and everyone is back inside safe and sound. Unbelievable.
On the other hand guess what doesn't work right? Yeah the FAILCANNON. See it turns out the pumps weren't built with space to allow for their gears to connect up to the pumps below them, so the bottom two levels of pumps are getting no power. Fine dwarven engineering I tell you. Its okay I've asked for a couple of walls to be removed and then we'll get some burly dwarves to man two of the pumps until we clear some of the water out. This is the never ending project.
26th Limestone, 512
I guess I was a bit louder than I meant to be with that last round of shouting about how far behind we are on the FAILCANNON schedule. Even the children are pitching in at this point.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-4/4child_labor.png)
5th Sandstone
Twobeard has mandated the construction of three traction benches and, of course, we have no chains in stock. I've given orders for three to be constructed, but it is unclear if we will get to that in short order. Traction benches are not what we need right now.
10th Sandstone
Kubek answered the call to come pumping and we had a tiny splash of water from the FAILCANNON go in the right direction.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-4/5failcannon_not_failing.png)
Who can tell me how this is going to end?
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-4/6failcannon_not_failing2.png)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
18th Sandstone
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-4/7forgottenbeastbuqui.png)
Yay something to keep Nagnod company. Let's just hope this one isn't smart enough to find a way in either, and yes I'm reasonably sure I didn't fix them all. We have miles of caves and whoever did the coffin in the stairwell retrofit left a lot of holes it seems.
edit: minor typos
Post by: Robocorn on July 27, 2010, 08:49:17 pm
Man we suck, it took us three years to build a basic pump stack weapon. We never get anything right. It's like Murphy's Law in dwarf form.
Post by: Twobeard on July 27, 2010, 09:00:39 pm
Post by: Andreus on July 27, 2010, 11:23:56 pm
Oh yeah, I got a bottle of sewer brew because I remembered that I'd left that deconstructed hatch on the stairwell sometime around galena of my last year, for some reason the dwarves refused to treat it as a door and wouldn't go up through it.
Man we suck, it took us three years to build a basic pump stack weapon. We never get anything right. It's like Murphy's Law in dwarf form.
Excuse me, I built a perfectly well-functioning magma cannon. Admittedly it was only two z-levels high and required manually operation but it worked and I did actually set something living on fire with it.
Oh, on that note, how is the diamond slug doing?
Post by: Robocorn on July 27, 2010, 11:31:36 pm
Oh yeah, I got a bottle of sewer brew because I remembered that I'd left that deconstructed hatch on the stairwell sometime around galena of my last year, for some reason the dwarves refused to treat it as a door and wouldn't go up through it.
Man we suck, it took us three years to build a basic pump stack weapon. We never get anything right. It's like Murphy's Law in dwarf form.
Excuse me, I built a perfectly well-functioning magma cannon. Admittedly it was only two z-levels high and required manually operation but it worked and I did actually set something living on fire with it.
Oh, on that note, how is the diamond slug doing?
Last I saw it was still alive and still on fire. If it ever gets out you'll have made it a million times worse.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 28, 2010, 01:37:27 am
Post by: Zathel on July 28, 2010, 01:44:56 am
In my experience there is absolutely nothing that can't be killed by dumping a full z-level or two of natural rock on top of it.
On that note, why in the fuck there are so many of the damned things out there?
Post by: Robocorn on July 28, 2010, 03:02:15 am
On that note, why in the fuck there are so many of the damned things out there?
This might not have been adequately explained.
When I genned Aluonra I was going to go out with an adventurer and kill all kinds of demons and semimegabeasts so I could get awesome engravings and statues of him (Instead of Iddor deerlies the moist grotto). So I genned the world to have acid rain inducing scorching biomes, an overabundance of savage biomes, and to be covered with deserts.
Because I wanted to know where these monsters were, I made a lot of caves and set the requirements for their attacks so low that I assumed even the genned cities would get them. Population requirement was around thirty and monetary requirement was around 35000. (Which is why titans have just been showing up)
With forgotten beasts it might just be because it's 511 AG and not 1050 AG and nobody got around to killing them.
Also there are 1000 varieties of demon, if that matters.
Post by: Oglokoog on July 28, 2010, 11:25:51 am
Post by: Glacial on July 28, 2010, 12:06:23 pm
Post by: Pisano on July 28, 2010, 12:35:02 pm
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-2/8no_migrants.png)
27th Sandstone, 512
I noticed Zon was hauling a skeleton of one of our fallen comrades away to a newly reopened portion of the fort. It was a ghastly sight, a pile of corpses none of which had been given a proper burial with some even tossed on top of coffins.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
16th Timber, 512
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/1dwarf_caravan.png)
and was promptly ambushed by a half a dozen goblin spearmen. When the militia (of one) gets up top I'll send him out.
18th Timber, 512
And a second ambush... there may be too many for the caravan guards.
19th Timber, 512
Two axe dwarves, a hammer dwarf, and two spear dwarves slew one group of the ambushers, but the other group has killed many of the traders. Evidently this made a donkey sad and more alarmingly drove one of the other traders insane with rage. I'm not sure I want to let them in until that guy calms down a bit.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/2traders_gone_nuts.png)
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/3sad_donkey.png)
Sad little donkey, it's okay little fella.
Zon sallied forth solo once again. He is quite fleet of foot, but the dwarves were all but lost by the time he made it to the fight. One axe dwarf in a martial trance remained, but he was badly wounded. Zon slipped into the fray with his usual gusto...
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/4zon_gusto1.png)
eww, in the lower lip!
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/5zon_gusto2.png)
A small herd of skeletal muskoxen chose that time to join the fray. Zon is badly outnumbered! The order to fall back had been given, but such orders are often ignored in the heat of battle and a fleeing goblin led him right into the undead quadrapeds.
The muskoxen are indiscriminate in their attacks aiming blows at goblin and dwarf alike. A martial trance kept Zon safe and even after it was over he slew one skeletal muskox and two zombie muskoxen. Amazingly he then chased the rest from the field before returning to the safety of the gates... unscathed.
By now you, the readers of this chronicle, may be sick of hearing how Zon sliced yet another limb off. This is for you.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
21st Timber, 512
The fighting is over, but sadly the dwarven trade caravan is all but wiped out. The insane merchant is still running around babbling with his donkey and the moans coming from the last axedwarf have stopped signifying his last gasp. May the mighty Rab embrace him into the earth.
28th Timber, 512
I had minor success sealing off part of the flooded area. It is hard to get enough folks to man the pumps, but I managed to get half of the FAILCANNON to limp along for a short while which was enough to seal off one area. Unfortunately the larger and more important area is still not sealed off.
3rd Moonstone, 512
Ah Winter.. Urist the child has organized a party to celebrate the beginning of winter. I told the workforce that they could take a break. We've been working non-stop for the last nine months, so I figured it was time to a little bit. I mean sure there are still dozens of corpses lying about and of course there are pools of blood and excretions from beasts I've forgotten all over the place, why not TAKE A BREAK AND PARTY???. And, of course, party time means that progress on pretty much everything has ground to a halt.
14th Moonstone, 512
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/7merchants_leaving_soon.png)
What this really means is that the lone surviving crazy babbling merchant will be leaving soon...
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/8crazy_merchant.png)
and his little donkey too...
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/9sad_donkey2.png)
20th Moonstone, 512
I commissioned and had installed 10 fine green glass windows for the overseer's office. I hope the next to use this office will enjoy them. Nightmarebros seems to be getting the hang of this glass making thing. At least he doesn't look like he is going to burn a hand off every time he goes near the magma glass furnace anymore.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/19overseers_office.png)
1st Opal, 512
Inod was looking a little down and I know she has a penchant for Electrum. I checked the stock log and we had some electrum bars so I asked Eral on the down low to make a new door, a couple of statuse and an armor stand for her quarters.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/12inods_room.png)
I also took the liberty of rewarding myself a bit. Since I went to the trouble of smelting those 150+ bars of silver, I might as well line my office, bedroom, and tomb with silver items and flooring. I deserve it.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/18pisanos_chambers.png)
21nd Opal, 512
A few last modifications have been made to the FAILCANNON. The top four pumps all operate on windmill power. The bottom two z-levels of our fair cannon still must be dwarf powered.
22nd Opal, 512
The FAILCANNON is operational, well the southmost pumps are and that was sufficient to seal up one of the breaches.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/10failcannon_working.png)
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/11flood_contained.png)
Now to try and seal the other one. Twobeards just told me that I'd be replaced we don't get this fixed before the end of the year! There is little time left, we'll never make it!
And that little brat Likot has decided to thrown a party...this time only the children were invited so the workforce remains intact. I think they did this so they could drink all the sewer brew without adult supervision. Those incorrigible lads and lasses.
25th Opal, 512
Tragedy has struck.... right as Dishmab was about to put the final door in place one of our pump operators decided to take a break and a jet of water flushed her into the watery abyss... I don't know if she can get out.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/13dishmab_glug.png)
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/14dishmab_drowned.png)
Guess that answers that.
26th Opal, 512
With the death of Dishmab Twobeards has told me that I have until the end of next month to clear up any outstanding paperwork and hand over the keys to the overseer's office. I will miss the scintillating gem windows.
27th Opal, 512
The cleverly carved crenelations north of the main gate serve as an inlet for some the FAILCANNONs water.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/15failcannon_floods_us_some.png)
6th Obsidian, 512
It is complete! The second breach has been sealed.
14th Obsidian, 512
While we've stopped the ocean from streaming in, it appears that there is an aquifer breach as well.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/17aquifer_breach.png)
25th Obsidian, 512
The work to repair the cistern is almost complete, which is good because the water levels for the well are getting a little low. At least I think that is how it gets filled up. I was told by my predecessor to not pull any of the cistern levers, so I have left them alone. I can see signs of where a flood went down the main ramp way and I should have them all patched up any day now.
Also of note, the top levels are draining out even with the aquifer breach. I leave it to my successor to deal with that little problem.
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/16stocks.png)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Save here http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=2844 (http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=2844).
edit: added save and a couple more pictures.
Post by: NightmareBros on July 28, 2010, 12:53:36 pm
Also, an excelent turn.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 28, 2010, 01:08:03 pm
How did the ocean get in? I don't want to go on an archive binge today.
Post by: TurkeyXIII on July 28, 2010, 01:21:08 pm
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/3sad_donkey.png)(http://www.itsallabouteeyore.awoodman.net/images/eeyore6.jpg)
I believe the aquifer flood was released by Melkorp, and is an entirely different problem. Last I checked, the flooded area ("lake mistake") was of little consequence and didn't flow (so no fps loss). That might have changed though.
For Urist: http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1417979#msg1417979
Post by: Pisano on July 28, 2010, 02:05:05 pm
I'm relatively new to dwarf fortress so that was my first succession fortress turn. I have to say that running at 7 or so FPS while the siege was on was brutal. I was up to maybe 10 or 15 for the rest of the time which felt quite snappy after 7.
I played this entire turn on 32.12. I didn't copy over an raws or make any changes though. I'm not 100% sure when one needs to do this so I didn't mess with it.
It took me a while to wrap my head around what I needed to do to fix the FAILCANNON. There were a few missteps and a few pitfalls like a few gears mechanisms in the walls. Gears aren't watertight, so the first effort just flooded everything. It did eventually work out and allow the leaks to be plugged, but it wasn't until late in the year. On the plus side we should be able to recover a lot of lost supplies once the water level recedes.
I have no idea why burial isn't working.. nobody will bury anyone despite a ton of free coffins marked to allow pets and citizens.
Clothing and armor... ugh, I have no idea how to make dwarves put their clothing back on. I tried a number of things, putting them in new squads with different equipment designations. Taking them out of quads.. I just don't understand what is wrong. The squads are a mishmash right now because I had put people into them who aren't military types. Actually having dwarves carry around a flask is a great thing, they can go a lot longer without having to run back for booze which is important when the main construction project is 100 z levels from the booze.
I carved out a new tree farm and irrigated it, but trees take a very long time to grow.
We could probably use a barracks, but I didn't assign one because I needed Zon for the workforce. I think he is no longer rusty at most of the combat skills which he was at the start of the year. We have a number of well equipped dwarves, but the only other one with notable combat skills, Kubek, insists on running around naked.
Lastly I had the doctor on very limited duties throughout the year since people would periodically go back in to the hospital for examinations. Nobody has really been sick or gotten injured since the first month when dwarves were dropping like flies.
Good luck and have fun!
Post by: Zathel on July 28, 2010, 02:30:29 pm
On another note, is there something really important I should do when I start? Otherwise I'll engage in another zany scheme like the last time. Not moving the fortress though, it'd be stale.
Hm, maybe I'll put it under the vote (Robocorn, put it in the poll if possible?). My current ideas are:
1. Hooking up FAILCANNON to magma sea (powered by a huge dwarven reactor)
2. Building a castle over the fortress entrance
3. Flushing all the grime from Battlefailed with carefully arranged sewage system
4. Constructing opulent quarters for every dwarf in Battlefailed
5. Getting rid of every Forgotten Beast using huge cave-in traps
Post by: Robocorn on July 28, 2010, 02:39:19 pm
As a personal suggestion. Do something about all the bones! they're killing the framerate and we just keep getting more of them! Make them into armor! make them into bolts to shoot at goblins! make them into totems and send them off with the humans! anything just get rid of the bones!
Post by: Dermonster on July 28, 2010, 02:40:45 pm
There is no what (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/FlatWhat) big enough.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 28, 2010, 02:51:24 pm
Keep the diamond slug alive. It's basically in the same position the fort is - you'd think it would be long dead, but it isn't. It may as well be our mascot.
Post by: Zathel on July 28, 2010, 03:33:01 pm
I've put up the poll. It won't be up for long so don't rely on it too much.
As a personal suggestion. Do something about all the bones! they're killing the framerate and we just keep getting more of them! Make them into armor! make them into bolts to shoot at goblins! make them into totems and send them off with the humans! anything just get rid of the bones!
I can atom smash them maybe?
Actually, it's a damn shame bones can't be used as a building material. Unless someone knows a way how to do it (custom reaction maybe?) without re-genning the world?
Post by: Oglokoog on July 28, 2010, 04:09:32 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 28, 2010, 04:12:51 pm
Post by: Robocorn on July 28, 2010, 04:20:18 pm
Mod an existing reaction (nobody uses fine pewter) to use bones and produce blocks of them.That's actually pretty brilliant. A bottle of sewer brew for you. We could be the first fort to have a literal ivory tower.
Just put in some filler about figuring out how to make bone blocks.
Post by: NightmareBros on July 28, 2010, 04:26:45 pm
Wow. this place is becoming more like a final fantasy Final boss dungeon by the minute.
The only thing better would be to rig the entire place to collapse at the pull of a lever, simulating the death of a load bearing boss. And maybe accidently killing a forgotten beast in the process.
Post by: Robocorn on July 28, 2010, 04:43:23 pm
Quote
[REACTION:PEWTER_LAY_MAKING]This was the closest thing I could make, If someone's better at modding than me I hope they can give it a try.
[NAME:make bone blocks]
[BUILDING:CRAFT:NONE]
[REAGENT:A:5:NONE:NONE:NONE:NONE][REACTION_CLASS:BONE]
[PRODUCT:100:1:GLOB:NONE:NONE:A:][PRODUCT_DIMENSION:150]
[SKILL:BONECARVE]
[AUTOMATIC]
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 28, 2010, 05:58:01 pm
[REACTION:<existing reaction that won't be used>]
[NAME:make bone blocks]
[BUILDING:<whatever the craftsdwarf's workshop is>:NONE]
[REAGENT:1:BONE:NONE:NONE:NONE]
[PRODUCT:100:1:BLOCKS:NONE:NONE:NONE][GET_MATERIAL_FROM_REAGENT]
[SKILL:<bone carving skill goes here>]
replace the <phrases> with the proper tags, preferably test somewhere else, and if it works, voila.
Add me back to the turn list please.
EDIT: Maybe it's
[REAGENT:1:NONE:NONE:NONE:NONE][HAS_BONE_MAT]
I have no clue.
Post by: Robocorn on July 28, 2010, 06:11:09 pm
[REACTION:FINE_PEWTER_MAKING]
[NAME:make bone blocks]
[BUILDING:MASON:NONE] (because I don't want to risk anything)
[REAGENT:5:BONE:NONE:NONE:NONE] (I made it less efficient so we actually lose bones. We don't need fifteen hundred blocks because that would be just as bad)
[PRODUCT:100:1:BLOCKS:NONE:NONE:NONE][GET_MATERIAL_FROM_REAGENT]
[SKILL:BONECARVE (I looked it up it's bonecarve)
EDIT: both of ours crash the game. We need to work on this a little more
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 28, 2010, 06:13:27 pm
Code: [Select]
[REACTION:NICKEL_SILVER_MAKING] Creiydrek actually likes pewter
[NAME:make bone blocks]
[BUILDING:KILN:CUSTOM_B] only certain buildings work with custom reactions, dunno why
[REAGENT:A:5:NONE:NONE:NONE:NONE][ANY_BONE_MATERIAL][USE_BODY_COMPONENT] they grab grouped stacks of bone so 5 makes them grab 5 stacks
[PRODUCT:100:1:BLOCKS:NONE:GET_MATERIAL_FROM_REAGENT:A:NONE]
FUEL you can bracket this if you like but we have magma kilns anyway
[SKILL:BONECARVE]Sorry if this is extremely clunky, and I haven't tested it, but it should work. I haven't had a great deal of time to figure out how the bones are handled.
Also, awesome turn, Pisano! It's great that we're still alive (and thriving, so to speak).
Post by: Twobeard on July 28, 2010, 06:23:49 pm
Post by: Robocorn on July 28, 2010, 06:51:11 pm
Code: [Select][REACTION:NICKEL_SILVER_MAKING] Creiydrek actually likes pewter
[NAME:make bone blocks]
[BUILDING:KILN:CUSTOM_B] only certain buildings work with custom reactions, dunno why
[REAGENT:A:5:NONE:NONE:NONE:NONE][ANY_BONE_MATERIAL][USE_BODY_COMPONENT] they grab grouped stacks of bone so 5 makes them grab 5 stacks
[PRODUCT:100:1:BLOCKS:NONE:GET_MATERIAL_FROM_REAGENT:A:NONE]
FUEL you can bracket this if you like but we have magma kilns anyway
[SKILL:BONECARVE]
Sorry if this is extremely clunky, and I haven't tested it, but it should work. I haven't had a great deal of time to figure out how the bones are handled.
Also, awesome turn, Pisano! It's great that we're still alive (and thriving, so to speak).
Your reaction doesn't crash the game, but every time I use it it just annihilates the bones and leave us with nothing.
I'll experiment with it a little further.
Nothing like deceased hellbound former leaders working together to make a building material out of corpses.
Post by: Twobeard on July 28, 2010, 07:02:41 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 28, 2010, 08:02:05 pm
[PRODUCT:100:1:BLOCKS:NONE:GET_MATERIAL_FROM_REAGENT:A:NONE]
to
[PRODUCT:100:1:BLOCKS:NONE:NONE:NONE][GET_MATERIAL_FROM_REAGENT:A]
I think that will work. I know I forgot the ":A" in my reaction.
I can't believe we're actually considering using bones as a building material.
For the coffins, replace BLOCKS in the product line with COFFIN. Maybe
Post by: Pisano on July 28, 2010, 08:34:59 pm
Post by: melkorp on July 28, 2010, 08:37:25 pm
An aquifer breach? Oh no! Is Battlefailed flooding again?
No, the aquifer breach is sealed off and doesn't flow: it was walled off about 10 tiles SW of the breach. Yeah, that was once an irrigation floodgate, before I dismantled it, and all the controls for the surface bridges/gates. The resulting flooded chambers are collectively known as Lake Mistake.
You dismantled all the gate levers? Are you insane?
Yes. Regardless, my vision was of Zathel's Lower Battlefailed, a Keep In the Deep, where no dwarf would ever set foot above the blue bridge on level 70something: pretty much what Robocorn found his second time around. So I didn't want to leave any levers out where our enemies could get at them. Just lots of bones.
Should Failcannon be used to cleanse the tainted deep, or is it a huge mistake?
Yes!
Post by: Robocorn on July 28, 2010, 08:49:13 pm
Code: [Select]
[REACTION:NICKEL_SILVER_MAKING] Creiydrek actually likes pewter
[NAME:make bone blocks]
[BUILDING:KILN:CUSTOM_B] only certain buildings work with custom reactions, dunno why
[REAGENT:A:5:NONE:NONE:NONE:NONE][ANY_BONE_MATERIAL][USE_BODY_COMPONENT] they grab grouped stacks of bone so 5 makes them grab 5 stacks
[PRODUCT:100:1:BLOCKS:NONE:MATERIAL_TEMPLATE:BONE_TEMPLATE]
[GET_MATERIAL_FROM_REAGENT:A]
FUEL you can bracket this if you like but we have magma kilns anyway
[SKILL:BONECARVE]So this works, which is an advantage. I've been working on trying to get it to identify the object as bone instead of just saying "this is blocks" but the fact that we can convert bones into building material at between 12 to 50 bones per wall, then we're making progress. But we all know that this is for naught unless the walls can be identified as bone. I'll need some help with that.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 28, 2010, 09:05:07 pm
Quote from: The wiki
Material reaction products are similar, but are generally used more for things like different kinds of creature materials than universal materials like stone. This token is how skin can be tanned into leather, which are two separate materials - the skin material has leather as a MATERIAL_REACTION_PRODUCT.
In short, they require the material to have a token such as
[MATERIAL_REACTION_PRODUCT:X:Y:Z]
...where X is the name of the reaction product that will be referred to in the reaction (RENDER_MAT, in the reaction class example, or TAN_MAT for leather), Y is the matgloss type of the desired product (such as INORGANIC or LOCAL_CREATURE_MAT) and Z is the specific material, like LEATHER or OBSIDIAN.
Source: http://df.magmawiki.com/index.php/DF2010:Reactions#Anatomy_of_a_reaction#ixzz0v25PnE74
From what I understand, in our case it would be [MATERIAL_REACTION_PRODUCT:BONE_MAT:LOCAL_CREATURE_MAT:BONE] (in material_template_default's bone template)
Red is speculation.
EDIT: Perhaps we could rig (yet) another reaction that turns a corpse into a bone block? I don't believe skeletons are counted as bone items.
EDIT2: Rereading this makes me believe the answer lies elsewhere. I'm confused by DF2010's reactions.
EDIT3: Checking raw/material_template_default reveals this in the skin template:
Quote from: Toady
This lets the game know to use this item to determine the exact material type for the leather product in the tanning reaction.
[MATERIAL_REACTION_PRODUCT:TAN_MAT:LOCAL_CREATURE_MAT:LEATHER]
There is no counterpart in the bone template.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 28, 2010, 09:48:33 pm
Code: [Select]
[INORGANIC:BONE_BLOCK_MAT]
[STATE_NAME:ALL:bone]
[STATE_ADJ:ALL:bone]
[STATE_COLOR:ALL_SOLID:WHITE]
[STATE_COLOR:LIQUID:WHITE]
[STATE_COLOR:GAS:WHITE]
[DISPLAY_COLOR:7:0:1]
[MATERIAL_VALUE:2]
[SPEC_HEAT:1000]
[IGNITE_POINT:10508]
[MELTING_POINT:NONE]
[BOILING_POINT:NONE]
[HEATDAM_POINT:10250]
[COLDDAM_POINT:9900]
[MAT_FIXED_TEMP:NONE]
[SOLID_DENSITY:500]
[LIQUID_DENSITY:NONE]
[MOLAR_MASS:NONE]
[IMPACT_YIELD:200000]
[IMPACT_FRACTURE:200000]
[IMPACT_STRAIN_AT_YIELD:100]
[COMPRESSIVE_YIELD:200000] cortical bone
[COMPRESSIVE_FRACTURE:200000]
[COMPRESSIVE_STRAIN_AT_YIELD:100]
[TENSILE_YIELD:115000]
[TENSILE_FRACTURE:130000]
[TENSILE_STRAIN_AT_YIELD:100]
[TORSION_YIELD:115000]
[TORSION_FRACTURE:130000]
[TORSION_STRAIN_AT_YIELD:100]
[SHEAR_YIELD:115000] used 'bone (limb)' from wikipedia tensile strength
[SHEAR_FRACTURE:130000]
[SHEAR_STRAIN_AT_YIELD:100]
[BENDING_YIELD:115000]
[BENDING_FRACTURE:130000]
[BENDING_STRAIN_AT_YIELD:100]
[MAX_EDGE:1000]
[ABSORPTION:100]
[IMPLIES_ANIMAL_KILL]
[BONE]
[ITEMS_HARD]
[ITEMS_BARRED]Then the new code would be:
Code: [Select]
[REACTION:NICKEL_SILVER_MAKING] Creiydrek actually likes pewter
[NAME:make bone blocks]
[BUILDING:KILN:CUSTOM_B] only certain buildings work with custom reactions, dunno why
[REAGENT:A:5:NONE:NONE:NONE:NONE][ANY_BONE_MATERIAL][USE_BODY_COMPONENT] they grab grouped stacks of bone so 5 makes them grab 5 stacks
[PRODUCT:100:1:BLOCKS:NONE:INORGANIC:BONE_BLOCK_MAT]
GET_MATERIAL_FROM_REAGENT:A try without this
FUEL you can bracket this if you like but we have magma kilns anyway
[SKILL:BONECARVE]
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 28, 2010, 10:00:38 pm
(http://annika.mu.nu/archives/siren.gif)
I DID IT.
Replace a reaction in reaction_smelter with:
[NAME:make bone blocks]
[BUILDING:KILN:NONE]
[REAGENT:A:5:BONE:NONE:NONE:NONE][REACTION_CLASS:BONE]
[HAS_MATERIAL_REACTION_PRODUCT:BONE_MAT]
[PRODUCT:100:1:BLOCKS:NONE:GET_MATERIAL_FROM_REAGENT:A:BONE_MAT]
[SKILL:BONECARVE]
and add
[REACTION_CLASS:BONE]
[MATERIAL_REACTION_PRODUCT:BONE_MAT:LOCAL_CREATURE_MAT:BONE]
to the BONE_TEMPLATE in material_template_default.
(http://img294.imageshack.us/img294/3073/96886313.png)
Post by: Robocorn on July 28, 2010, 10:14:02 pm
Wouldn't that require a regen?yes, I'm just going to copy over nickel silver because we can't make it anyway. I'll see if it works.
(http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/369/boneblocks.png)
It totally does.
for the pure awesomeness we have condensed we have had togive up nickel silver. Anyone who liked nickel silver now likes bone and anything made of nickel silver is now made of bone. For this reason feel free to increase the material multiplier even though we can only make blocks out of it.
Code: [Select]
[REACTION:NICKEL_SILVER_MAKING] Creiydrek actually likes pewter
[NAME:make bone blocks]
[BUILDING:KILN:CUSTOM_B] only certain buildings work with custom reactions, dunno why
[REAGENT:A:5:NONE:NONE:NONE:NONE][ANY_BONE_MATERIAL][USE_BODY_COMPONENT] they grab
grouped stacks of bone so 5 makes them grab 5 stacks
[PRODUCT:100:1:BLOCKS:NONE:METAL:NICKEL_SILVER]
GET_MATERIAL_FROM_REAGENT:A try without this
FUEL you can bracket this if you like but we have magma kilns anyway
[SKILL:BONECARVE]Code: [Select]
[INORGANIC:NICKEL_SILVER]
[STATE_NAME:ALL:bone]
[STATE_ADJ:ALL:bone]
[STATE_COLOR:ALL_SOLID:WHITE]
[STATE_COLOR:LIQUID:WHITE]
[STATE_COLOR:GAS:WHITE]
[DISPLAY_COLOR:7:0:1]
[MATERIAL_VALUE:2]
[SPEC_HEAT:1000]
[IGNITE_POINT:10508]
[MELTING_POINT:NONE]
[BOILING_POINT:NONE]
[HEATDAM_POINT:10250]
[COLDDAM_POINT:9900]
[MAT_FIXED_TEMP:NONE]
[SOLID_DENSITY:500]
[LIQUID_DENSITY:NONE]
[MOLAR_MASS:NONE]
[IMPACT_YIELD:200000]
[IMPACT_FRACTURE:200000]
[IMPACT_STRAIN_AT_YIELD:100]
[COMPRESSIVE_YIELD:200000] cortical bone
[COMPRESSIVE_FRACTURE:200000]
[COMPRESSIVE_STRAIN_AT_YIELD:100]
[TENSILE_YIELD:115000]
[TENSILE_FRACTURE:130000]
[TENSILE_STRAIN_AT_YIELD:100]
[TORSION_YIELD:115000]
[TORSION_FRACTURE:130000]
[TORSION_STRAIN_AT_YIELD:100]
[SHEAR_YIELD:115000] used 'bone (limb)' from wikipedia tensile strength
[SHEAR_FRACTURE:130000]
[SHEAR_STRAIN_AT_YIELD:100]
[BENDING_YIELD:115000]
[BENDING_FRACTURE:130000]
[BENDING_STRAIN_AT_YIELD:100]
[MAX_EDGE:1000]
[ABSORPTION:100]
[IMPLIES_ANIMAL_KILL]
[BONE]
[ITEMS_HARD]
[ITEMS_BARRED]
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 28, 2010, 10:23:40 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 28, 2010, 10:28:14 pm
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 28, 2010, 10:39:29 pm
Maybe this will work?
Code: (Reaction) [Select]
[NAME:make bone blocks]
[BUILDING:KILN:CUSTOM_B]
[REAGENT:A:5:BONE:NONE:NONE:NONE][REACTION_CLASS:BONE][HAS_MATERIAL_REACTION_PRODUCT:BONE_MAT][USE_BODY_COMPONENT]
[PRODUCT:100:1:BLOCKS:NONE:GET_MATERIAL_FROM_REAGENT:A:BONE_MAT]
[SKILL:BONECARVE]Code: (Add To Bone Template) [Select]
[REACTION_CLASS:BONE]
[MATERIAL_REACTION_PRODUCT:BONE_MAT:LOCAL_CREATURE_MAT:BONE]
Post by: Robocorn on July 28, 2010, 10:41:18 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 28, 2010, 10:47:46 pm
I think without the body component tag they might grab bone crafts and armor (edit: or other bone blocks) to make blocks with.
Already taken care of.
Quote
[REAGENT:A:5:BONE:NONE:NONE:NONE]
Yeah, you're right. It still takes skulls and cartilage, but eating bone blocks to make bone blocks is bad and that solves it.
Post by: Robocorn on July 28, 2010, 11:26:54 pm
Yeah, you're right. It still takes skulls and cartilage, but eating bone blocks to make bone blocks is bad and that solves it.
What exactly is wrong with getting rid of skulls and cartilage. Most of the cartilage in battlefailed has long rotten away and a zombie muskox skull pillar sounds like the most awesome thing you could ever conceivably make.
Regardless, we should finish up our reaction so Zathel can incorporate it into Battlefailed's continuity and we can stop this off topic modding conversations. Seth's final update to Urists brilliant correction will work fine so we'll use that one.
Code: (for reaction_smelter replacing make_nickel_silver) [Select]
[REACTION:NICKEL_SILVER_MAKING]
[NAME:make bone blocks]
[BUILDING:KILN:CUSTOM_B]
[REAGENT:A:5:BONE:NONE:NONE:NONE][REACTION_CLASS:BONE]
[HAS_MATERIAL_REACTION_PRODUCT:BONE_MAT][USE_BODY_COMPONENT]
[PRODUCT:100:1:BLOCKS:NONE:GET_MATERIAL_FROM_REAGENT:A:BONE_MAT]
[SKILL:BONECARVE]Code: (to be put in material_template_default under bone_template) [Select]
[REACTION_CLASS:BONE]
[MATERIAL_REACTION_PRODUCT:BONE_MAT:LOCAL_CREATURE_MAT:BONE]
Post by: Zathel on July 29, 2010, 02:43:44 am
Post by: Robocorn on July 29, 2010, 02:48:47 am
So yeah, alchemy's cool.
just change this
Quote
[REACTION:NICKEL_SILVER_MAKING]
[NAME:make bone blocks]
[BUILDING:KILN:CUSTOM_B]
[REAGENT:A:5:BONE:NONE:NONE:NONE][REACTION_CLASS:BONE]
[HAS_MATERIAL_REACTION_PRODUCT:BONE_MAT][USE_BODY_COMPONENT]
[PRODUCT:100:1:BLOCKS:NONE:GET_MATERIAL_FROM_REAGENT:A:BONE_MAT]
[SKILL:BONECARVE]
to this
Quote
[REACTION:NICKEL_SILVER_MAKING]
[NAME:make bone blocks]
[BUILDING:KILN:CUSTOM_B]
[REAGENT:A:5:BONE:NONE:NONE:NONE][REACTION_CLASS:BONE]
[HAS_MATERIAL_REACTION_PRODUCT:BONE_MAT][USE_BODY_COMPONENT]
[PRODUCT:100:1:BLOCKS:NONE:GET_MATERIAL_FROM_REAGENT:A:BONE_MAT]
[SKILL:ALCHEMY]
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 29, 2010, 09:19:12 am
Post by: Will Alvein on July 29, 2010, 12:13:07 pm
I guess that's all I have to say... well, besides of saying how awesome this whole thread is and all that, but that would be stating the obvious...
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 29, 2010, 12:46:18 pm
Post by: Zathel on July 29, 2010, 12:58:57 pm
23rd Obsidian 512
I have notices something... strange about some of the filth plaguing Battlefailed. I heard that Doctor Solonarros identified that one of the forgotten beast's excretions was responsible for that dreadful skin rot we've lost some people to this Granite, and that must be it.
See, it has some strange properties, apart from the now well known very gruesome effect on living flesh. I'm not really sure what exactly they are but... I will find out. Not that there's much more to do with the flooding of upper Battlefailed contained, thanks to the pump system the previous Overseer, whatever his name was, designed.
29th Obsidian 512
So, Mayor Twobeard Rigothbelal think I'm the man for the job of overseeing Battlefailed next year. I don't think I've even spoken to him before, but who am I to question him? I guess I'll have to try. Maybe my dear Illie and Deggie will rest easier knowing that I did my best to help our home... and their final resting place.
Also, I think I'm nearing a breakthrough on that extract. It certainly seems to influence organic material, without getting into reaction with it. I'll be borrowing a forge in the magmaworks to test out some theories I developed.
3rd Granite 513
THAT'S IT! I got it!
I got my hands on books one of the previous Overseers, Bookmaster Ottanlimul, brought with him from Mountainhomes. Along bureaucratic dredge there was hidden a report on some of the more arcane practices of the humans from Gil Thinir. It helped me greatly with achieving a breakthrough. In the honor of this Overseer, even if I heard he had an adamantium stick up his bureacratic ass, I'll name the substance I isolated from the slime "Zathelite".
Zathelite is a powerful catalyst. It allows binding and hardening of bones so that they have hardness and overall strength of metal or hard rock. Reaction requires high temperatures, provided by magma kilns, and a dose of clotted blood... which we have in abundance. As a catalyst, its completely reusable, so we won't have to worry about getting more than I already isolated.
I've been going around the fortress, asking my compatriots about many things. After hearing about my invention, someone threw out an idea to construct a huge totem above the drainage system... out of bone. It was met with general approval. I have to say I agree, though. It will serve as a deterrent. Maybe, after it's done, goblins will leave us alone. If not... the second demand that was made will take care of them.
After completing the totem, I will do my best to construct a huge power generator, using another of Zathel's manuals. It will be then used to power a huge pump stack that will utilize the drainage system outlet to pour magma on anyone stupid enough to bother our home.
13th Granite 513
I don't know who though that fortifications of ground level of the surface were a good idea, but I ordered them sealed. When the magma Device will be complete, we won't want hot fiery death flooding our courtyard.
According to plans, there should be an additional floodgate near the reservoir that was reserved for "future projects". I have found none. No documents involving it's deconstruction too. There goes my plan to supply the reactor this way. On top of it, the crazy obsidianizing operation carried out by one of the Overseers rendered the usual water supply completely useless. Unless I make it work again.
I have also ordered construction of additional kilns. We'll need them.
23rd Granite 513
Creiydrek finished first bone... block. Ugly, misshapen mess of muskox bone. It will serve perfectly.
I'm having trouble with getting people to work. Especially Fikod. Mine you fool, we need to snap out of this stagnation, and we need some digging to do that!
4th Slate 513
Surprisingly, some migrants arrived. Novice siege operator, high master butcher who, as he said, knows how to handle himself in a fight, Mountainhome University Architecture Department dropout, a bowyer, skilled ranger, a farmer, master carpenter, a thresher who used to serve in the army, a fish dissector and, for a lack of better term, a thug. Ten dwarves in total. Much needed addition to our little community. They got a taste of what's life in Battlefailed is like. Got chased by an undead groundhog just before reaching the gates.
Some stray dog got locked out. Mutt snuck out just before the gate slammed close. It won't be missed. Hell, it might even survive until we have a good reason to open the gates. Stranger things happened.
28th Slate 513
After a month of hard digging, Fikod returned from the caverns, drenched head to toe, wearing only his pick and the biggest smile I've seen in Battlefailed, ever.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
This solves the water problem.
***
Ordering via manager works. Do you folks mind if I wait a day for therapist update? it's fucking annoying to run a fort when you're used to it. In other news, the reaction is badly constructed. It uses 5 different entities of bone, which often causes dwarves to drop the task at gathering materials stage and steal gathered bones from other kilns. I reduced it to 1 to 1.
Post by: Glacial on July 29, 2010, 01:13:23 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 29, 2010, 01:58:54 pm
Post by: Robocorn on July 29, 2010, 02:36:48 pm
We still have a problem of sapience - namely, that our dwarves won't butcher anything that showed signs of it. What I think we need is another reaction that uses corpses as a reagent.
That is so naive that it doesn't even make sense. We cant use corpses in a reaction because if the
[ETHIC:MAKE_TROPHY_SAPIENT:SHUN] tag in dwarven civilization.
the obvious solution is to change it to
[ETHIC:MAKE_TROPHY_SAPIENT:PERSONAL_MATTER]
or barring that
[ETHIC:MAKE_TROPHY_SAPIENT:ACCEPTABLE]
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 29, 2010, 02:45:41 pm
Post by: Oglokoog on July 29, 2010, 05:11:51 pm
Also, there have been no zombie whales so far. I was looking forward to seeing some back when this fort started...
And if I could request yet another redorfing, that would be awesome too. Any dwarf will do.
Post by: Dante on July 29, 2010, 05:36:11 pm
Post by: Robocorn on July 29, 2010, 06:17:42 pm
I thought that, if you change any entity tags, it requires a world regen.
maybe it does, but the entity tag itself interferes with any goblin to brick reactions during the run of the game so we'll have to just drop using goblin bones and elf bones. Even if we came up with a reaction to turn dead goblins into corpse bricks to get around butchering them it would fail to be utilized because we can't use goblin parts because goblins (being sapient) are forbidden from being used as material in the entity files.
I'll try to find the problem with zathel's kilns.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 29, 2010, 06:21:52 pm
Post by: Twobeard on July 29, 2010, 06:47:41 pm
Post by: Robocorn on July 29, 2010, 06:58:07 pm
There's no problem with having more than one kiln, I tested it before. The problem is that the bones are hidden and you'll have to go into the d>b>H menu to reveal them all then subsequently claim all of the forbidden bones outside of the fort.
EDIT: Urist, Andreus said identical goblins because in my turn I came to the conclusion that all goblins are named Stozu using a large number of goblin warriors and members of their civ as examples. If you can rename all of the goblins "Poison" without changing the names of any of their buildings and civilizations then you'll get a gold star.
I'm not sure I like the idea of making them nonsapient just so we can use their bones.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 30, 2010, 01:15:02 am
Pisano mass forbade a lot of the bones presumably to keep the dwarves from going on land during the seige to get them. The several hundred limbs we had are mostly hidden and forbidden.
There's no problem with having more than one kiln, I tested it before. The problem is that the bones are hidden and you'll have to go into the d>b>H menu to reveal them all then subsequently claim all of the forbidden bones outside of the fort.
This fort is such a beautiful mess.
Just my $.02. Bone blocks are one thing, but I'd be against changing the intelligence of creatures just so we could use their bodies in reactions.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 30, 2010, 02:14:12 pm
Post by: Zathel on July 30, 2010, 02:42:44 pm
Next update tomorrow morning, I was busy today.
Awesome, thanks Urist.
BTW, if anyone wants to get dwarfed, tell me. You'll find overview of professions in my story posts. We have 4 fighters (competent female and adequate female axedwarves+other combat skills, and two male novice brawlers+combat skills), competent one is also a pretty decent marksdwarf. Since archery training and fighting finally works, I've been thinking of actually drafting her in that role. Or I'll just stick an battleaxe in her hand and tell her to go slaughter wildlife.
Post by: SethCreiyd on July 30, 2010, 02:57:52 pm
Zathel, Therapist works with 31.12! But you have to manually input the info: http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=39229.msg1429753#msg1429753
Post by: Twobeard on July 30, 2010, 05:08:21 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 30, 2010, 05:44:17 pm
Post by: Lucus Casius on July 30, 2010, 05:47:52 pm
It is Hammertime for "Urist the Viole(n)t." Yes, that is what I want my dwarf to be named, with the (n).Your dwarf is both highly aggressive and bluish-purple. Good to know.
Post by: Oglokoog on July 31, 2010, 03:07:19 am
Post by: Zathel on July 31, 2010, 04:05:34 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
***
Well, it works. Somehow. But it only uses bones, and it seems every stack of bone ever was forbidden in the fort. How can I add skulls to the mix?
**
9th Felsite 513
Work is slow, but steady. I just hope this mad idea for a "reactor" works, to bring magma up to surface we'll need a lot of power.
I also noticed that we don't have any ore ready to process. Once our two miners are done with digging out the reactor, I'll send them out to mine some iron, marble and coal. I have a feeling we'll need it.
13th Felsite 513
I heard that the dog that got locked out was butchered by kobolds today. Oh well.
19th Felsite 513
One of the elves got mauled by muskoxen before militia could rush up top. You'd think they'd learn to send guards with their caravans by now.
And they brought next to nothing too. A few barrels of alcohol, that's it. Not even one log of wood. And we'll need lots of wood if we hope to build that reactor. At least Avuz, whom I forced into trading, got some practice in appraising. I hope humans will bring something better. Or anything useful at all.
10th Hematite 513
We've struck fresh veins of iron ore and coal, we also know where to mine marble. I'd rather not touch anything in the old fortress, we've had luck so far, I'd rather not risk changing it.
Zathel's note:
I swear these fuckers have a death wish. All of them. I couldn't do shit for over a month because I was busy watching the front gate and waiting for a good moment to close without locking one idiot or another out of the fortress. So frustrating. Even more so that I remembered I can just force them to move inside using a burrow after that lost month. Go me. And even after I ordered them inside via alert, it took forever to actually get to the point where I could pull the damned lever. I don't understand why the animals won't just fucking stay in the dining room, like they do in all my other forts.
22nd Malachite 513
I'm not cut out for this job. I'll just play along with Mayor Twobeard till the end of the year, ensure there are bone blocks ready for whomever wants to pick up that totem business, and generally make things as comfortable for everyone as possible. Speaking of which, I noticed we don't have enough barrels. Or booze. I need to hunt down whomever is responsible for this.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on July 31, 2010, 07:37:00 am
Post by: Robocorn on July 31, 2010, 04:32:31 pm
Post by: Pisano on July 31, 2010, 04:50:38 pm
Post by: dragonshardz on August 01, 2010, 02:18:38 am
Post by: Lupusater on August 01, 2010, 05:08:34 pm
Post by: Pisano on August 01, 2010, 06:03:13 pm
Post by: SethCreiyd on August 01, 2010, 07:24:08 pm
Post by: Zathel on August 02, 2010, 04:39:50 am
Lupusater, I dorfed myself as the last dwarf with any blachsmithing related skill, so you get a mechanic - closest thing I could think of. You became a farmer, Dragonshardz.
***
14th Galena 513
Pumps for the reactor are complete. Now it only needs water and water wheels. Now I can put my full attention to building that totem the dwarves convinced me to construct after all.
18th Galena 513
Human caravan arrived, only to be set upon by a huge band of goblins. I was unsure if I should open the gates, but humans are good in a fight. Soon all the goblins were dead, with only a few wounded on the caravan side, as far as I've seen. Fat good it did us, they decided they want nothing to do with us afterwards and left. Well, fuck you too, damn bastards. I hope that poor slob that you left behind gets mauled by skoxen.
Zathel's note:
I found the reason why dwarves and animals were so intent on going outside. Someone (I think it was SethCreiyd) left an active meeting zone outside, near the shaft into the caverns. I deleted it, so no more problems of this nature should pop up.
24th Galena 513
I think that bloke the caravan left behind wasn't with them. I mean he was, but not a part of it, as in, not a trader. I decided to let him in. Or at least offer him this opportunity. At the same time as the gate opened, a cat unexplicably died midway through the spiral staircase. An omen perhaps? That, or foot rot. We'll never know.
It seems I made the right call about that human. It turns out he's a liaison from Mountainhomes. He came up to Twobeard, said "Hi" and asked to be let out. Yeah, right, I will, right away. I wonder if I can lock him in somewhere and leave him to starve. Maybe our dear queen Led will get a clue after her lackey doesn't return.
25th Galena 513
I don't think he will, and it's not even my fault. After realizing that gates will stay closed, that guy braced himself and went into the third cavern layer. Just like that. I am shocked, amazed, and I feel a little guilty. He had guts, if nothing else.
17th Limestone 513
Totem rises up slowly over the desolate landscape of the Plains of Ooze. I'm not entirely sure what it should represent. Maybe a skull? Skulls are always good. We'll have problems with bone block supply though, even if we only use them for the outer walls. I'd make sure goblin bone blocks were facing the front, but from the distance no one would be able to tell, so why bother.
5th Sandstone 513
No more bone blocks. We've run out of bones. Other dwarves tell me that only some of the bones work in my reaction. It seems I need to work on it. There are tons of skulls lying around... why can't we use them?
***
Ok, how do I add skulls, partial skeletons and front legs etc. to the reaction? Now it only works, as I said, with items with "bone" in the name, and if we want a sizable bone construction, we need more than that.
Post by: Robocorn on August 02, 2010, 06:40:57 am
I had a butcher shop up near the entrance but I think it might have ben destroyed in the flood the following year.
Post by: SethCreiyd on August 02, 2010, 08:36:59 am
I wonder if the liaison makes it off the map, he has a chance to get home safely, even if it's underground?
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 02, 2010, 08:41:04 am
Post by: NightmareBros on August 03, 2010, 10:06:29 am
Post by: Zathel on August 03, 2010, 02:56:39 pm
Post by: Robocorn on August 04, 2010, 03:04:25 am
"Battlefailed, join and you'll get a life"
There's no problem though, melkorp took longer and his turn was pretty good. I see no problem in waiting a bit longer for the next stage of chaos.
Post by: ShadowZane on August 04, 2010, 05:44:30 am
May be the false section to ask but in my games i like NEVER get mud on the ground for farms...T_T
Btw I read the entire thread in some hours cause of the pura FAIL and fun that was in here xD
Post by: Robocorn on August 04, 2010, 06:08:26 am
I've only done that twice and the thread was a hell of a lot shorter then.
Anywho, In Battlefailed we get food in a myriad of magical ways.
- We flood huge swaths of the fort
accidentallyentirely on purpose and only plant things that are seasonal so we can wonder why there's no food come Felsite - We eat all of the
pets of deceased dwarvesstray animals by slaughtering them enne masse whenever they become a bother or the stockpile is too far away - We wait for the caravans to come get massacred by three goblin ambush squads simultaneously and
barter our valuablesransack the wreckage for sustenance - We fish.
Hope I helped ShadowZane, feel free to use our techniques in your own forts.
Post by: ShadowZane on August 04, 2010, 06:42:14 am
Post by: SethCreiyd on August 04, 2010, 11:55:21 am
Anywho, In Battlefailed we get food in a myriad of magical ways.
- We flood huge swaths of the fort
accidentallyentirely on purpose and only plant things that are seasonal so we can wonder why there's no food come Felsite- We eat all of the
pets of deceased dwarvesstray animals by slaughtering them enne masse whenever they become a bother or the stockpile is too far away- We wait for the caravans to come get massacred by three goblin ambush squads simultaneously and
barter our valuablesransack the wreckage for sustenance- We fish.
I did number two twice!
We're down to not-so-many dwarves. When you have as few as we do, you could probably sustain everyone on simple plant gathering in the caverns.
Animal husbandry is by far my favorite method of getting food. Embarking with three females and a male something is usually enough to guarantee you won't starve, as long as you keep the livestock safe. I usually trade for viddles rather than farming.
Post by: Zathel on August 05, 2010, 04:23:27 pm
I've ordered any unprocessed corpse still inside the walls to be brought to butcher's shops for processing. Maybe we can
20th Sandstone 513
Just in case, I decided to slaughter all warthogs, save one (for zoo's sake). We could use the meat anyway, and they smell worse than muskoxen.
27th Sandstone 513
It seems none of the bones from corpses can be used in reaction. Shame. Might as well stock the larders of Battlefailed with meat. I hope everyone here likes meat. We'll be eating it for decades to come. I guess if I ever get around to sculpting, I need to make a statue of Urist McPasteur in thanks for inventing his incredible preservation methods (especially his "5-minute rule") used in our society nowadays.
13th Timber 513
Goblins arrived today. About two score of them. I don't bother with counting exactly, they won't be getting in, they'll get bored and then they'll leave. Damn shame totem isn't finished.
15th Timber 513
Power must be getting to my head. Since there are no bowmen with them, I actually considered getting together with few others and basking in good ol' fashioned carnage. Cries of battle, clash of steel on iron, screams of the wounded, dance of life and death, trance of war and all that stuff.
Then I drank some beer and got better.
17th Timber 513
Thank god I came to my senses. Another score and some of them arrived, including a dozen or so bowmen. And a few trolls. It is not the day Battlefailed proves it's name was aptly chosen.
23rd Timber 513
Some of the dwarves started complaining about numb feet. Idiots. Just because no one died because of foot rot in a year doesn't mean you can run around naked, the damned extract is still around.
12th Moonstone 513
Today, Zon stumbled upon a gremlin in the spiral staircase at stockpile level. If only every problem Battlefailed suffers from was so kind to come straight to the solution.
***
I'm on 25th Moonstone now. I'll do the last two months tomorrow morning. Hopefully.
Right. Screenshots. I wish I could say I knew I forgot about something, but no such thing. I didn't know I forgot something. I can catch a shot of the siege, maybe a combat log from Zon's scuffle with the kobold if it didn't disappear yet.
I'd post the totem shot if the visualizer was working. Sadly, it wasn't updated as far as I know and the save doesn't work in earlier versions.
Post by: Oglokoog on August 05, 2010, 04:28:16 pm
Post by: SethCreiyd on August 05, 2010, 04:44:17 pm
Post by: Haspen on August 05, 2010, 05:10:57 pm
Posting for
Post by: Pisano on August 05, 2010, 05:12:47 pm
I'll bet twenty dwarfbucks that gremlin was headed straight for the main gate's lever.
I only take bets for bottles of sewer brew! In this case that would be been about the most fun thing for Battlefailed though so I'm inclined to agree.
Post by: melkorp on August 06, 2010, 07:05:33 am
Post by: SethCreiyd on August 06, 2010, 07:42:14 am
(http://i869.photobucket.com/albums/ab252/pisano_dwarf/battlefailed-5/5zon_gusto2.png)
Zon is so badass, he parries blows with his weapon while it's stuck in his enemy's flesh?
Post by: Robocorn on August 06, 2010, 08:26:57 am
Post by: Pisano on August 06, 2010, 08:40:49 am
Post by: Zathel on August 06, 2010, 10:23:17 am
Goblins still sit there, outside the gates. Only weird thing is that they've split into 3 groups. Hammergobs to the north, by the old shaft, the bulk of axegobs, lashers and archers southeast of the gate, on the plains, and a couple trolls at the beach, south of the fortifications. Are they planning something? Not likely. If they had any way of breaching the gates or bypassing the walls, they'd have done so long ago.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
1st Opal 513
That's it for the totem this year, I guess. I feel queasy just thinking about slaughtering more livestock, and we ran out of bones. Maybe my successor will pick it up. Maybe not.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Over 9000 hours in MS paint. I tried to make a skull. Lvl 104 contains teeth, lvl 106 nasal hole. I just hope I'm not the only one that can honestly say it resembles an actual skull.
7th Opal 513
The pump stack for the reservoir and irrigation isn't working. I don't know why. Maybe it has something to do with the tunnel dig out into the cavern at tle lowest level (WHY?). Maybe it has to do with the lake being made of obsidian now. If I could get my hands on the idiots that pulled off this foolishness, I would... gah. For the time being, I ordered reconstruction of the pump at the very bottom of the stack. Hopefully it'll help.
13th Opal 513
I found the reason for the whole pump stack mess. Bureaucracy. Apparently I was the only dwarf unaware that for some unfathomable reason usage of that one pump was forbidden due to some silly document. Thank gods I found that stupid piece of paper before I ordered construction of another pump right next to the perfectly functioning one. Shame I couldn't find it in time to stop the mining work to prepare space for it.
15th Opal 513
Finally, the reservoir is refilled. One more problem for the reactor out of the way. Now it only needs water wheels and axles to connect the gears. I'll finish installing the drainage system in coming days. However, actually flooding the banks of the power stations will have to wait until wheels are finished.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
27th Opal 513
Today, Onul, of of the most recent migrants, gave birth to a boy. She named him Erush. I guess Battlefailed isn't that bad of a place if children are still born here.
3rd Obsidian 513
Drainage and water access floodgate mechanisms for the reactor are complete. I hope the rest of this month, and my term at the same time, will be uneventful and peaceful.
18th Obsidians
When I looked over the wall today, the goblins were gone. I wonder when they'll come again. I hope it'll be next winter, so they won't disrupt the caravans. I just love seeing the buggers stand in the rain, wallowing in muck of Plains of Ooze while being battered by pungent winds blowing from over the Blueness of Malodors.
1st Granite 514
Finally, I can lay down the burdens of leadership. It was a rather peaceful year, even if non of the big projects I planned out last Granite are finished. Not enough dwarves, not enough resources. I just hope next overseer will be someone more suited for the job.
I've started uploading the save. It'll take a while. I'll edit the post with the link soon
http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=2903 (http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=2903)
Post by: SethCreiyd on August 06, 2010, 11:05:54 am
Post by: Andreus on August 06, 2010, 11:51:22 am
Post by: TurkeyXIII on August 06, 2010, 01:20:34 pm
you happened to catch me on what may be a busy weekendBecause that's the Battlefailed way!
Post by: Zathel on August 06, 2010, 01:27:42 pm
Awesome. A giant skull hovering the fort is way appropriate.
In my plans it required 3 z-levels to be complete, which, assuming full completion of the sides of the skull, would require about 40 bone blocks more. I let out dogs and cows, maybe they'll breed to the point where completion of this project will be possible.
Also, the reactor should provide about 2500 units of power. I should be enough to power double pump stack carrying magma to the FAILCANNON itself. If not, building another reactor right next to the existing one (it could even be hooked up to the same drainage tunnel) should solve any power shortages. There is of course, major shortage of wood for the water wheels and axles.
Post by: Pisano on August 06, 2010, 02:05:15 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 06, 2010, 04:00:32 pm
Post by: NightmareBros on August 06, 2010, 04:09:36 pm
Post by: Pisano on August 06, 2010, 04:14:06 pm
edit: children
Post by: Zathel on August 06, 2010, 05:32:24 pm
The cause is the frozen extract of some FB. So, the foot rot is actually nothing more than untreated hypothermia. No chance of epidemic of any kind.
Post by: Andreus on August 08, 2010, 10:36:57 am
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_1.png)
*VWIP!*
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_2.png)
1st Granite, 514
Again I return from the darkness - and this time, I decided upon a body and mind far more fit for continued survival than my previous incarnations. It strikes me as a little odd I didn't think of this before. Something else that I cannot help but remark upon are the mind-searingly terrifying screams I heard while traversing the void between the world of the gods and departed spirits and this realm - I don't really remember that happening the last two times. I'll have to get on to Lur or Sahed to fix that for next time - really does spoil the trip. Either way, I have returned to the land of the living, and it seems that all is not well.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_3.png)
I mean for fuck's sake.
Post by: Andreus on August 08, 2010, 10:55:46 am
1. Continue a previous project that someone else was going to do (the reactor, for instance, or the failcannon). For this I will need a comprehensive explanation of how they're supposed to work, where all the control levers are and what isn't finished yet.
2. Start my own project for which I will need nothing more than an instruction on how to allow dwarves to build on the landscape outside the front gates.
3. Do nothing interesting for a year which is lame.
4. Burn the place to the goddamn ground as is in my mind to do but I shall not do without everyone else's express permission due to the fact that there are a lot of people on the list who haven't had a turn yet.
Post by: Zathel on August 08, 2010, 11:26:15 am
Building outside the gates is simple - the lever for the main gate is the one on the hoard level, in a small separate room, flanked by two lowered bridges.
Edit: oh fuck, sorry, I forgot to delete the graphics from the save folder.
Post by: Oglokoog on August 08, 2010, 11:43:51 am
Post by: TurkeyXIII on August 08, 2010, 01:14:54 pm
As for building on the landscape... is it still under siege or something?
Post by: Pisano on August 08, 2010, 03:33:05 pm
As for projects you should undertake... well, yeah, this is one of the most completely and totally screwed up fortresses I've ever seen. The fact that it limps along is amazing to me. Also the fact that we had migrants recently is astonishing. Make good use of them!
Post by: SethCreiyd on August 08, 2010, 03:42:16 pm
As for projects you should undertake... well, yeah, this is one of the most completely and totally screwed up fortresses I've ever seen. The fact that it limps along is amazing to me. Also the fact that we had migrants recently is astonishing. Make good use of them!
I share that astonishment. Were there any whispers about cursed death-traps or knowing Battlefailed would be their tomb?
Post by: Andreus on August 08, 2010, 07:23:12 pm
Curses.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_6.png)
EDIT:
CURSES!
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_7.png)
Post by: SethCreiyd on August 09, 2010, 02:04:04 am
Post by: NightmareBros on August 09, 2010, 02:38:43 am
Our new Overseer is now crippled by Footrot that spread to his entire body.
Post by: Zathel on August 09, 2010, 10:58:35 am
This is hilarious.
Our new Overseer is now crippled by Footrot that spread to his entire body.
First thing I did when I dwarfed myself was to draft him(myself?) into militia and get him to wear armor, boots included.
Actually, drafting every dwarf and setting only required equipment as boots should help. I made a bunch of bronze low and high boots at the end of my turn.
Post by: Andreus on August 09, 2010, 11:08:29 am
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_8.png)
Well we all know what this means.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_9.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_10.png)
I swear, if it weren't for the fact that every time they see them they hack them to bits, I'd swear that the goblins were in league with the elves.
Our militia can't possibly repel firepower of this magnitude so there's only one thing for it - the FAILCANNON must be deployed. Due to unfinished maintenance work a former overseer attempted to perform on it, it cannot be deployed automatically. There's only one thing for it.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_11.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_12.png)
The deployment shaft begins to fill with the Blueness of Malodor's befouled waters and I prepare to commit to memory the faces of the goblins as they are inundated under a tide of... wait, what?
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_13.png)
Goddamnit! They've just moved to the beach, where FAILCANNON can't reach them - wait, what?!
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_14.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_15.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_16.png)
Post by: Haspen on August 09, 2010, 11:13:26 am
Honestly.
Post by: NightmareBros on August 09, 2010, 11:14:02 am
Also I just got ninja'd.
Post by: Zathel on August 09, 2010, 12:06:00 pm
I can't wait till someone finally hooks up FAILCANNON to magma, just so it turns out the plumbing for the pump stack is leaky and hot searing death spills over Battlefailed. Couple that with accidental deconstruction of main power valve lever so the magma won't stop flowing.
Post by: NightmareBros on August 09, 2010, 12:17:50 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 09, 2010, 01:10:13 pm
Thank Armok it wasn't magma.
I can't wait till someone finally hooks up FAILCANNON to magma, just so it turns out the plumbing for the pump stack is leaky and hot searing death spills over Battlefailed. Couple that with accidental deconstruction of main power valve lever so the magma won't stop flowing.
I'll do it!
Post by: Andreus on August 09, 2010, 01:22:43 pm
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_17.png)
The end result of FAILCANNON's deployment are two extremely damp elks, drenched hoof-to-horn in the foul water of the Blueness.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_18.png)
On a slightly more positive note, the Eternal Machine is in and of itself well on its way to completion, but a curious issue strikes me. I cannot work out through which combination of its control levers it will correctly activate. I must consult the schematics further, and see if I can divine the correct method by which it should be initialised.
Post by: Oglokoog on August 09, 2010, 02:47:16 pm
Post by: Battlecat on August 09, 2010, 04:31:30 pm
I didn't see if you solved the problem of the floating dwarves in your arena. Thought you might like to know, I had an eternally suspended dwarf in my fortress and I managed to get him unstuck using Runesmith. I built a stable surface for him to stand on and then found him in Runesmith. A suspended dwarf is flagged as being a projectile, so all I had to do is find him in the list and then uncheck the projectile Flag under the flags tab in Runesmith. Once I unpaused my game, he started walking on the surface I built and went right back to work like nothing happened.
Hope this helps!
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 09, 2010, 04:36:49 pm
Post by: Zathel on August 09, 2010, 04:52:09 pm
Leave them. They're a feature.
And when Battlefailed will be close to finally succumbing to one threat or another, they will wake from their sleep and deliver the fury of Armok upon the enemies of dwarfkind! (Even if stuck moody dwarf prevents us from ever creating another artifact).
Also, I am pretty sure the reactor will work fine. Only thing it needs is water. The basic power station (pump+2 wheels) is something I've taken from magmawiki, so there should be no flaw there. Only problem I can envision is the gear labeled "main power gear" collapsing upon deactivation when reactor finally starts running.
Post by: Andreus on August 09, 2010, 04:55:21 pm
Leave them. They're a feature.
Listen, can we work on a compromise? Can we unfuck the one with the strange mood, and leave the other guy there?
Post by: NightmareBros on August 09, 2010, 05:03:06 pm
No refunds
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 09, 2010, 05:51:01 pm
Post by: Twobeard on August 09, 2010, 07:59:43 pm
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 06:02:28 am
I looked outside today and it seems the goblins have vanished. I imagine the somewhat impregnable nature of the front gates combined with the fact that we can (admittedly very inefficiently) dump several metric tons of befouled seawater on their heads if they try to assault them must have rather eroded their conviction.
In other news, I have begun work on the final solution to the goblin problem - an undertaking which will undoubtedly take years, and I am unlikely in the extreme to be able to sustain leadership of this place for that long save some public relations miracle of cosmic proportions with the other denizens of this fortress. However, I shall start, and if the dwarves of this place desire a future, they shall complete its construction long after I have moved on.
Ladies and gentledwarves, I present to you: FAILCANNON PRIME.
I have used knowledge not of this world to aid in its construction. In a previous incarnation, I was permanent administrator at Laboredholy, one of dwarvenkind's most well-kept secret successes. For more than thirty years she stood before I died and passed from that world into another, and never have I been in a more successful fortress. Initially our forges were placed just above the great magma sea, but this became an arduous journey indeed, down more than a hundred flights of stairs through three separate cave levels. Part of the secret of its later successes was the magma plumbing which we used to funnel magma from the great magma sea far beneath the mountain into the forges only two flights of stairs beneath the main concourse in the highest level of the cave system. This kept the caves warm and allowed a new set of forges just below the rest of the fortress. To enable this we created a truly immense pump stack (http://mkv25.net/dfma/poi-23373-thepumpstack), a marvel of interdependent engineering that allowed us to raise the magma to the level we required it. It took five years to build, and suffered several setbacks - everything from attacks from forgotten beasts to an exhausted supply of iron.
I have dredged the memories out of the fog of ages with several arcane invocations and have reproduced as much as I can of the original design. At that point in my manylife, before I had discovered the secret of the Eternal Engine, the device had to be powered off a wind farm (http://mkv25.net/dfma/poi-23374-windfarm) on the surface, which was an inelegant and inefficient method of obtaining the neccessary motive force to keep the stack running. The axle and the turbines were also vulnerable to attack - a besieging army could have wrecked the turbines or the axle and disabled the stack (although we never suffered from such an ailment, as the kingdom in which we lived was an island nation, quite secure from any goblins). It never occured to me at the time to use such a stack to create a weapon - the only attacks we suffered from were forgotten beasts and the occasional giant cave spider, which were too irregular, erratic and unpredictably placed to effectively deploy magma against.
The stack will be the equivalent height of roughly one hundred and three flights of stairs, and will in places cut through empty space in the caverns around which stone containment walls will need to be built. However, the masterstroke in the modified plans which I have drawn up is that when it is operational we shall be able to power FAILCANNON PRIME's stack off of the Eternal Engine, meaning that the device is self-contained and need not present any vulnerable parts to the world above - only the business end of its magma pump, which shall rain down fire and brimstone upon the heads of all who oppose us.
For this undertaking we shall need 110 stone or iron blocks, 110 iron pipe sections, 110 iron corkscrews, 110 iron doors. At the very least we shall need 330 units of hematite, limonite or magnetite and 110 stones of a magma-safe material. I remember from my second incarnation within this stinking pit of hell that I crafted a sanctum for myself within a deposit of magnetite, but I believe that it's currently flooded with water or otherwise inaccessible.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 10, 2010, 07:41:20 am
Post by: NightmareBros on August 10, 2010, 07:46:56 am
Quote
FAILCANNON PRIMEAUTODORFS, rollout?
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 08:16:21 am
12th Limestone, 514
My journeys between realities, through the many levels of the hereafter and across the endless void that separates them and everything inbetween, though harrowing and tiring to my eternal soul, have not been without fruit. I have seen wonders and terrors beyond the wildest imaginings of lesser minds - and I've learnt knowledge that no mortal could hope to. And so it is that I try a grand experiment - through the use of Void Sorcery, I shall attempt a grand invocation to attempt to free the two souls trapped in spiritual stasis inside the cursed arena.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_19.png)
???????????????????????????????
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_20.png)
It worked... partially. Only Dante was freed from his eternal prison, but at least I have wrenched one soul from the void. Now he's... whispering to himself and running off?
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_22.png)
Oh. Oh.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_21.png)
Out of interest, I notice that due to being locked in time for several years, he's the only member of the fortress still wearing clothes by choice.
25th Limestone, 514
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_23.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_24.png)
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 10, 2010, 09:19:33 am
Also: Asshole miner stole too much of our precious lumber.
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 09:23:07 am
Also: Asshole miner stole too much of our precious lumber.
Pshaw, you obviously don't know about the steady supply of it from the muddy obsidian farm.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 10, 2010, 10:07:54 am
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 10:34:46 am
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_25.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_26.png)
Well, it is a VERY nice hatch cover, but I'm not entirely sure what use we'll find for it.
The aquifer in Upper Battlefailed has somehow burst open and is flooding the old farming area, so I've ordered one of the vertical accessways into the upper area of the fort to be paved over before the water reaches it. This shaft seems, as far as I can tell, to reach all the way down to the third cavern, breaching a solid pillar of rock in the second cavern to descend safely through the slime ocean, coming out near the obsidian flats the old lava pump used to produce (I am henceforth calling that my "proof of concept"). I have no idea what the purpose of this shaft is, but if it isn't sealed, the whole place will, quite inevitably, drown until the water reaches the level of the aquifer. I've unforbidden everything in the affected areas of Upper Battlefailed that it's safe to recover, and ordered the shaft sealed while we still can.
16th Timber, 514
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_27.png)
Finally! We've been waiting for this chance to show the Mountainhomes there's still life in Battlefailed for-
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_28.png)
Wait, what?!
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_29.png)
You've got to be joking.
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 10:42:27 am
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 12:54:37 pm
I have utterly terrible news.
Today is the day Battlefailed dies.
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_36.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_37.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_38.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_39.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_40.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_41.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_42.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_43.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_44.png)
More to follow.
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 12:57:21 pm
IT SHALL NOT FALL!!!!!!!!!!
Post by: Glacial on August 10, 2010, 01:03:06 pm
I'm seeing some forgotten beast action in those screenshots. Did we get a new one, or did the diamond slug make it up top?
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 10, 2010, 01:16:21 pm
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 01:26:01 pm
An entirely new one, actually. As I write this, Edzul Dodokducim, Child Menace just suffocated - it seems to go after the children by preference. Down to 7 dwarves - 2 miners (one of whom is Leesin, trapped in the Cursed Arena), 1 woodworker, 3 children and a recruit. If we get down to just Leesin, I'm going to remove his lost soul status, unmiserable him, buff him to Legendary in every combat skill and bring a decisive end to this invasion, one way or another.
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 01:28:05 pm
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_35.png)I want him to be the last one now.
An entirely new one, actually. As I write this, Edzul Dodokducim, Child Menace just suffocated - it seems to go after the children by preference. Down to 7 dwarves - 2 miners (one of whom is Leesin, trapped in the Cursed Arena), 1 woodworker, 3 children and a recruit. If we get down to just Leesin, I'm going to remove his lost soul status, unmiserable him, buff him to Legendary in every combat skill and bring a decisive end to this invasion, one way or another.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 10, 2010, 01:32:38 pm
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 01:35:09 pm
Since the last deathlist update, these dwarves have died:
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_45.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_46.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_47.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_48.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_49.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_51.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_52.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_53.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_54.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_55.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_57.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_58.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_59.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_60.png)
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 10, 2010, 01:38:10 pm
Post by: Dermonster on August 10, 2010, 01:39:09 pm
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 01:41:33 pm
Nightmarebros just made mayor by roulette selection.
He's currently paralyzed, winded, thirsty and miserable, his right arm is broken in two places, his right leg is severed below the knee and the thigh is broken and his upper spine's shattered.
I am going to chalk this up as quite probably the shortest reign of a mayor in the history of Dwarf Fortress.
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 01:43:08 pm
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_61.png)If he survives i am going to be happy
Nightmarebros just made mayor by roulette selection.
He's currently paralyzed, winded, thirsty and miserable, his right arm is broken in two places, his right leg is severed below the knee and the thigh is broken and his upper spine's shattered.
I am going to chalk this up as quite probably the shortest reign of a mayor in the history of Dwarf Fortress.
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 01:48:09 pm
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 01:50:48 pm
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_62.png)
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_63.png)
Post by: Lucus Casius on August 10, 2010, 01:57:58 pm
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 02:03:13 pm
Since we're pretty much screwed now, even if you buff the hell out of Leesin, I'm wondering if we're going to go to the trouble of reclaiming Battlefailed?
Reclaiming is utterly broken right now. Bar getting Toady One himself in here to advise me exactly what to do, I'm almost certain the game will crash if I try.
All the children are dead now. Nightmarebros has surprised me with his resilience - he's crawled away from the place where he was lying on the stockpile room floor and into some sort of odd drainage chamber filled with grates:
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/514_66.png)
Other than that we have Leesin, trapped in stasis, and Avuz Oshrirgasol who's holed up in the bowyer's workshop, unable to finish whatever he's working on.
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 02:09:05 pm
Post by: SethCreiyd on August 10, 2010, 02:10:08 pm
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 02:11:14 pm
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 02:13:52 pm
Post by: NightmareBros on August 10, 2010, 02:58:23 pm
Quote
just waiting for nightmarebros to dieoh lol. I am one resiliant little bastard, and increadibly sneaky too. That thing, whatever the hell it was that tried, very hard, too kill me just left me for dead. leaving me the position of mayor. JUST AS PLANNED.
Well, I lost one of my legs, and am nearly a cripple, but I suppose that using a crutch as a peg leg is not out of the question, and being crippled never stopped anybody from recovering. And plus it means I would never have to do some meangingfull work, due to being slightly crippled, and being the mayor. JUST AS PLANNED.
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 03:24:22 pm
For Battlefailed... (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IeJ1GaDDgzA)
Post by: helf on August 10, 2010, 03:26:05 pm
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 03:27:01 pm
EDIT: PRAISE BE TO ARMOK! Reclaim possible but point-buy does not look like it will provide either enough skills or enough equipment to allow for Stuzung to be taken down. Given that bolts are back to being ridiculously deadly I figure my best hope is to make seven crossbowdwarves and make a show of it. I was possessed of enough foresight to pull the lever that opens the front gate, so the fortress should be accessible without knocking anything down. I'll keep a documentation of the reclaim whether or not Stuzung dies, but if it doesn't, I think I'm going to declare that Battlefailed has had its time, and that all things must end.
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 03:30:53 pm
When you started posting all the pictures of the dead, i got mad world stuck in my head. And now you just posted a song that is also from the donnie darko sound track.
Could battlesfailed be the fortress verison of donnie darko?
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 10, 2010, 03:42:33 pm
Also, can I get the site and worldgen params?
Post by: NightmareBros on August 10, 2010, 03:47:03 pm
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 03:48:24 pm
I think we've had it, people. I'm really sorry. Want me to write a proper epilogue now?
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 03:51:00 pm
Post by: Haspen on August 10, 2010, 04:00:37 pm
The fort was hillariglorious, and also, lived to it's name by unability to battle siegers.
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 04:03:03 pm
IT SHALL SOMEHOW RISE FROM THE ASHES! YOU WILL SEE YOU WILL ALL SEE!
Post by: NightmareBros on August 10, 2010, 04:10:55 pm
Let Stuzung drown in a mess of his own making. We can always de-flood old battlefailed when we get the resources too.
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 04:12:29 pm
Post by: Lucus Casius on August 10, 2010, 04:13:35 pm
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 04:15:57 pm
*cue epic Urist McChurchill speech*Battlefailed is more then a fort, its an idea. Battlefailed represents what dwarf fortress is all about, and if this fort falls, then dwarf fortress falls. We have been though so much with battlefailed, so I ask you, the people, to suffer some more. Not for battlefailed, but for what it represents! It represents fun! AND I WANT SOME MORE GOD DAMN FUN!
Post by: SethCreiyd on August 10, 2010, 04:34:05 pm
*cue epic Urist McChurchill speech*Battlefailed is more then a fort, its an idea. Battlefailed represents what dwarf fortress is all about, and if this fort falls, then dwarf fortress falls. We have been though so much with battlefailed, so I ask you, the people, to suffer some more. Not for battlefailed, but for what it represents! It represents fun! AND I WANT SOME MORE GOD DAMN FUN!
Losing is fun.
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 04:36:43 pm
You miss the point of my speech, the greatness of battlefailed is that it always loses, but still goes on.Losing is fun. Cheating just to prolong losing is not.*cue epic Urist McChurchill speech*Battlefailed is more then a fort, its an idea. Battlefailed represents what dwarf fortress is all about, and if this fort falls, then dwarf fortress falls. We have been though so much with battlefailed, so I ask you, the people, to suffer some more. Not for battlefailed, but for what it represents! It represents fun! AND I WANT SOME MORE GOD DAMN FUN!
Post by: Glacial on August 10, 2010, 04:37:27 pm
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 04:41:48 pm
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 04:50:37 pm
The creature must have been enraged by the vibrations of the Engine as it began to grind into gear - there was no other explanation for the speed and ferocity of its attack, when so many other creatures had made their presences known years before any aggression was offered. Finding quick passage into the fortress, the monstrous stonefly screamed up the access shaft into the guts of the fortress - perhaps by chance, perhaps by some quirk of karma, perhaps by attraction to his mystic aura, Andreus' fourth incarnation was his first target. It was perhaps an indication of the fortress' impending fate when despite his incarnation's skill with an axe and quickness of body, he fell in an instant, struck dead by the monster before he could even scream. Soul shorn from his body, he could only watch as Fikod Koganilush Dumatedod Egom, one of the fortress' champions, was dashed against the walls in a similar fashion. Two miners fell dead by the time someone had fought to raise the alarm and mobilise the militia, little knowing the beast was far, far beyond such petty interruptions. As the first squad approached, the forgotten abomination showed its true, horrifying power - releasing a shockwave of foul, cloying dust, it stopped Battlefailed's bravest sons in their tracks, those who were not set upon by the thing immediately were left choking and gasping their last as they watched their friends cut down in front of them.
Nearly every former overseer of the fort left alive until that point was killed almost simultaneously - a somewhat fitting, if macabre closure to their careers. With no serious resistance left in the fortress, its malevolent gaze turned upon the most defenceless of all the residents - the children. A dozen screams rang out through the fortress in quick succession as each child was torn limb from limb. A last-ditch effort was made to save the fortress as every remaining dwarf who could hold a weapon ran to the stockpiles and siezed whatever instrument of war they could lay their hands on, charging the beast as one, with all the courage, fury and honour a dwarf with nothing to lose can muster.
It was a brave and honourable but ultimately futile guesture. Those who did not die instantly were to die a slow, painful death as Stuzung's foul dust filled their lungs and stopped their breath.
"Nightmarebros", one of the only survivors, clung to life for days afterwards, managing to crawl up to a safe spot where he could hide from the monster as it took out its unending rage upon the dining hall, the arena and the various workshops that had once filled the place with the clamour of chisel upon stone and saw upon wood. His back was broken in several places and the beast had hacked off his leg just below the knee - dragging himself on his hands and his one good leg had taken hours of painful, agonising effort, but for now he was safe. But to what future? Should the great armies of Dastot Cog arrive this very hour he would never walk again at the very best - more likely he would die choking within the next few days, for the dust was in his lungs. The fortress as he knew it was shattered, a boneyard and a charnel-house full only of the ashes of everything he had once loved. Everyone he knew was dead or dying. His breath slipping from him in ragged, frothy gasps, he pleaded to the gods for it to end.
Whether by the gods, or the spirits, or nature, or simply the random chance of the cosmos, his wish was granted. From his eternal imprisonment burst Leesin - despite being trapped outside of time itself, he somehow possessed an instinctive knowing of what had passed in the fortress. Quietly slipping past the monster he made his way into Upper Battlefailed. Little did he remember of the place, but he knew enough of what was there to sabotage the floodwalls keeping the foul ocean above out. As the water began to seep in, he made his way to Battlefailed's military stockpile and grabbed for himself what equipment was left after the rest of the populace had ransacked it. Seizing for himself a weapon which will forever be lost in the mists of time, he marched down to the hallway outside the grand dining hall which had once echoed with the rowdy, joyous drinking songs and animated conversations of a hundred or more dwarves. There he spied the beast.
All was lost. But there was still hope - hope that justice might yet be done. As he faced the chittering abomination, Leesin spoke only two words.
"Kar Nokzamungeg" - "For Battlefailed".
He died gloriously, in battle with the beast that had murdered his people, but before his last breath, a smile crossed his lips as a distant crashing was heard.
The water was coming.
Tossing the dwarf's mangled body aside, Stuzung Menacedcave the Dreamy Abyss screeched in rage as it caught the sound of the ocean in the fortress' stale air. Screeching and flailing it cast about to slake its insane rage upon anything within reach, workshops, corpses, doors, statues. The crash echoed closer.
The water was close.
Flailing with all six of its chitinous, vile limbs, this creature, this monster from before the dawn of recorded history, instead of seeking shelter, sought with all its might to somehow avenge its inevitable fate upon its surroundings, giving voice to its frustrations with an unclean holler of vexation. But it was far too late. The crashing water had reached the level of the great hall.
The water had come.
The creature had just time to witness with its many-faceted eyes the doom that awaited it.
And then Battlefailed was gone.
----
A moment of silence, if you will, gents.
Final save (http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/514/Battlefailed_TheEnd.zip).
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 04:55:40 pm
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 05:06:28 pm
Or is it?
Yeah. Really. It's gone. I am certain once you take a look at the save you will start agreeing with me.
Somehow either the seawall or the provisions we made to seal the aquifer have failed, and failed spectacularly. The whole of Battlefailed will flood, the framerate will crawl, and unfortunately, Stuzung will most likely still be alive (outside of inspiring fiction, FBs don't drown). Most of the mineral veins are now underwater. All three cave systems will eventually flood because Battlefailed was not hermetically sealed, and the cave systems are expansive enough that it would be difficult to dig around them to get to the magma ocean - and building a pumpstack would be nigh-impossible. In any case there would be absolutely no source of potable water as from what I understand of the mechanics it only takes a single 1/7 unit of seawater to contaminate an entire lake's worth of freshwater. The bondaries of the fort and the cave systems are not visible upon reclaim so it would be nearly impossible to tell if we were about to break into them. The only possible method I can think of for fixing this is some iteration of the burning lignite bin trick, for which we would need magma, which, as stated before, will be extremely difficult to access.
Battlefailed is dead, unless we savescum.
Post by: dragonshardz on August 10, 2010, 05:10:10 pm
EDIT: Snagging the final save, I'm going to poke about.
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 05:10:26 pm
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 05:14:01 pm
Post by: NightmareBros on August 10, 2010, 05:20:52 pm
Quote
I am going to attempt to save it without savescumming.A dwarf-worthy quest. May armok shine his many blessings out of your backside.
Also, andreaus, who's going to be mad at battlefailing dieing as it lived: failing spectaculary, with the failcannon, the bane of every engineer dwarf in the fort, finally exploding and flooding the fort so badly it could flood the entire underground.
And plus I probably didn't drown. JUST AS PLANNED. although I am now possibly stuck in a sealed room as water comes down around my ears, which was not part of the plan.
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 05:30:39 pm
I bet Stuxul is still down there on fire, though.
At some point we should have a summit on the general feasability of a reclaim, after we've each done our own research into the matter. I would highly value SethCreiyd and Urist Imiknoris' inputs on this matter as I get the impression they're the experts in the Dwarf Fortress field.
Post by: Zathel on August 10, 2010, 05:31:47 pm
May the souls of Battlefailed's dwarves rest in eternal peace, for they undertook the impossible and prevailed through threats and tribulations that have felled many greater fortresses.
Rest in peace, Battlefailed. And may you serve as a symbol of dwarven resilience in the face of impossible odds.
Even more so if the reclaim succeeds.
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 05:54:17 pm
The goblins we captured have escaped, and, due to the oddness of reclaim, are not only friendly, but appear to have killed some of the FBs. "Stuxul's yellow diamond" is lying on the floor of the main stockpile room near a few goblins.
According to Runesmith, Stuzung is somewhere nearby, hiding in ambush.
Post by: NightmareBros on August 10, 2010, 06:01:10 pm
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 06:03:22 pm
Oh wow, freindly goblins. I think we now have something to use against Stunzung. Or against the seiging goblins.
They'll turn violent the moment there's a siege or a childsnatcher.
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 06:05:23 pm
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 06:06:32 pm
16.Andreus 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1468087#msg1468087), 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1469178#msg1469178), 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1470667#msg1470667), 4 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1470960#msg1470960), 5 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1472983#msg1472983), 6 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1473159#msg1473159), 7 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1473403#msg1473403), 8 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1473638#msg1473638), 9 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1473694#msg1473694), 10 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1473997#msg1473997), 11 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=57052.msg1474197#msg1474197) Fall of Battlefailed.
I don't think I've ever been more honoured.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 10, 2010, 06:24:45 pm
At some point we should have a summit on the general feasability of a reclaim, after we've each done our own research into the matter. I would highly value SethCreiyd and Urist Imiknoris' inputs on this matter as I get the impression they're the experts in the Dwarf Fortress field.
Why thank you. I have the save, now to crack it open and see what horrors await in the world of dwarves.
Now would be a good time to mention that I have no clue how reclaim works? Personal Science Time. Or has it changed from 40d?
EDIT: Something ambushed something down on Z-96. Checking with dfreveal.
Result: A gobbo lasher found our buddy Stuzang.
And another beast (Nagnod, water blob) has ambushed as well.
Post by: Glacial on August 10, 2010, 06:33:57 pm
Note to self for future succession forts: implement panic rooms & plan for anti-flyer defenses. I'm having a problem with giant bat-mounted goblin siegers in my current fort. Stuzang looks ten times worse.
Post by: Andreus on August 10, 2010, 06:40:00 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 10, 2010, 06:45:15 pm
EDIT: Ambush #3. My guess is that the diamond slug is still on fire. If it is, I can stop digging and just let the fire evaporate the water. 8)
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 07:01:12 pm
EVERYONE GO FOR IT, IF WE HAVE ONE GOOD GAME WE CAN LIVE ON!
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 10, 2010, 07:06:06 pm
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 07:12:09 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 10, 2010, 07:23:09 pm
Post by: Dermonster on August 10, 2010, 07:48:06 pm
Post by: Daetrin on August 10, 2010, 08:31:21 pm
Post by: Twobeard on August 10, 2010, 08:32:28 pm
I shall raise a keg to Battlefailed and drink to its glorious misfortune
We shall remember them... The sons of Battlefailed.
Post by: Lucus Casius on August 10, 2010, 08:33:53 pm
You are contractually obligated to retell your experiences with mind rendering horrors.If you can write in an antiquarian style, so much the better.
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 09:05:07 pm
EDIT: Until i get my far superior computer back in the mail, I have to use this piece of junk. So temporary out of the business of saving battlefailed.
Post by: frozen on August 10, 2010, 09:21:20 pm
Post by: Aik on August 10, 2010, 09:55:25 pm
I'm downloading the save and will join in the reclamation efforts, but I don't have much confidence that my computer can handle it.
Edit: ... this place is more of a mess than I realised. Holy shit that's a lot of corpses.
From my brief look at it, the problem is that the doors stop being tightly shut after reclaim? If that's the problem, then the entire reason everything has gone to shit is the doors at level -2 that are now leaking water. By tightly closing them, shouldn't all the water in Upper Battlefailed just drain to the bottom and everything will be peachy?
Edit2: Aaaand Stuzang found us so we're all going to die.
Uh - how do doors work in this version, anyway? It's been a while since I played, and IIRC doors had to be kept tightly closed to keep water out. This is still true, right?
Because it does look to me like the water at the top levels is less deep than it was, and I can't see anywhere else that water could possibly be leaking in through other than those doors. I could be imagining it though, and it doesn't look like we get to see what happens any further. That deadly dust sure is deadly.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 10, 2010, 11:29:21 pm
Post by: cappstv on August 10, 2010, 11:41:02 pm
Now that I said that I expect one of you to come up with a brilliant idea to do just that.
Post by: Ieb on August 11, 2010, 06:32:14 am
You should start a fort right next to this one. RP it out as an attempt to mine to the place and reclaim it that way, but ingame-wise, it's for the engravings that might occur.
You know with dorfs dying, withering away and a stonefly laughing while curbstomping them.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 11, 2010, 11:29:44 am
If only there was a way to destroy those doors....
Now that I said that I expect one of you to come up with a brilliant idea to do just that.
I'm trying it. All you need to do is dig a little and desecrate Andreus' laboratory. The problem is that the still-flooded area is 3-4 z-levels high and the door is on the bottom. My armorer keeps cancelling because he chooses to stand in the doorway while deconstructing it.
Post by: SethCreiyd on August 11, 2010, 01:30:11 pm
You should start a fort right next to this one. RP it out as an attempt to mine to the place and reclaim it that way, but ingame-wise, it's for the engravings that might occur.
You know with dorfs dying, withering away and a stonefly laughing while curbstomping them.
I really like that idea. Battlefailed may have died, but perhaps we haven't heard the last of Queen Led and the Blueness of Malodors. For all we know she's still ticking, and even if not, her heiress daughter is shaping up to be just as nasty.
We're set up for a sequel. We never saw Iddor Deerlies, Led never came to the fort, we missed our opportunity to become a barony, and the ending was well, you know (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/LeftHanging).
I say we one day start a new outpost for the glory of all The Sword Of Boots. Maybe we could have a succession adventure game in the meantime to add a little more history to the region?
Regarding reclaim attempts, I haven't been able to look at it yet, but it does sound pretty screwed.
Post by: Andreus on August 11, 2010, 01:39:39 pm
Regarding reclaim attempts, I haven't been able to look at it yet, but it does sound pretty screwed.
My firm opinion sir, is that if anyone can make head or tail of this fuckstorm, it's Robocorn, Imiknorris or you.
In the meantime, would anyone be willing to help me do a playtest of a mod I made?
Post by: Zathel on August 11, 2010, 01:50:00 pm
Regarding reclaim attempts, I haven't been able to look at it yet, but it does sound pretty screwed.
My firm opinion sir, is that if anyone can make head or tail of this fuckstorm, it's Robocorn, Imiknorris or you.
In the meantime, would anyone be willing to help me do a playtest of a mod I made?
What kind of mod are we talking about here?
Post by: cappstv on August 11, 2010, 01:58:59 pm
Post by: cappstv on August 11, 2010, 02:33:33 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 11, 2010, 02:45:13 pm
EDIT: Oh hey there Stuzang.
Its abdomen is fractured. Its left antenna bears a massive straight scar.
EDIT2: I (believe I) have completely isolated the surface. The fort will have to be reclaimed in time, but it must first drain. There is already a hole leading into the caverns,so we will not have to worry about not having room for the water to drain into. We are surviving. Stuzang has been walled/floored into the fort. He will have to wait for us to build a military and challenge him to continue his assault.
Post by: cappstv on August 11, 2010, 03:07:40 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 11, 2010, 03:09:08 pm
Post by: cappstv on August 11, 2010, 03:16:16 pm
EDIT: I was finishing off the rest of the members of the cult until I suddenly started to die. As i went unconscious 6 members of the cult surrounded me and killed me. I guess this is what i get for getting distracted from my quest to kill the queen.
Post by: Robocorn on August 11, 2010, 03:41:05 pm
Either way, the blueness is still going to suck, there's still going to be hostile undead horned animals in the plain of ooze and Titans will still show up at the drop of a hat. I guess that might be the point of it all.
It would be nice to have a Dwarven paradise succeed to spite that human queen but even without all of the glitches we faced it will be tough. Is everyone up for it? There might be a river in the plain of ooze if you don't want to go near the shoreline.
Post by: BlackRogue on August 11, 2010, 03:44:20 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 11, 2010, 04:00:48 pm
Post by: NightmareBros on August 11, 2010, 04:13:20 pm
Quote
peaceful and quiet.
Quote
Battelfailedwhat.
WHAT.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 11, 2010, 04:16:36 pm
EDIT: I just told my mother about this fort. She got two impressions from it:
1) "That doesn't even sound salvageable."
2) "Random Primal Horrors would be a great name for a rock band."
Post by: cappstv on August 11, 2010, 04:20:54 pm
I was wrong, this whole world is crazy insane.
Post by: Lucus Casius on August 11, 2010, 04:25:28 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 11, 2010, 04:27:19 pm
Post by: Andreus on August 11, 2010, 04:33:52 pm
EDIT: I just told my mother about this fort. She got two impressions from it:
1) "That doesn't even sound salvageable."
2) "Random Primal Horrors would be a great name for a rock band."
On that note I'd like to say that your mother sounds pretty cool.
Post by: cappstv on August 11, 2010, 04:42:48 pm
I have no chance of revenge, or do I?
I'm going after the daughter.
NOTE: Her husbands ear was torn off by a yeti, and her foot was injury by a Cyclops.
Post by: Robocorn on August 11, 2010, 05:10:01 pm
I still wish we could use some tool to see what exactly is going on in Battlefailed, most of the other famous successions fell to Spirits of fire, Stuzang seems to be a whole other beast quite literally.
A stonefly looks like this apparently
(http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/e/e6/Stonefly_-_dinotoperla.jpg/220px-Stonefly_-_dinotoperla.jpg)
I might start some fanart myself.
I'll link to any sequel once it get's going at the end of the turn list.
Post by: cappstv on August 11, 2010, 06:04:36 pm
Post by: melkorp on August 11, 2010, 08:44:25 pm
Post by: cappstv on August 11, 2010, 08:57:30 pm
Battlefailed 2: Led is dead Or: How I learn to stop worrying and love the failcannon.
Post by: darkwolf on August 11, 2010, 09:16:28 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 11, 2010, 09:20:54 pm
Post by: BlackRogue on August 11, 2010, 09:43:25 pm
Post by: Robocorn on August 11, 2010, 09:57:58 pm
Post by: Lucus Casius on August 11, 2010, 10:08:07 pm
Post by: cappstv on August 11, 2010, 10:16:20 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 11, 2010, 10:29:27 pm
Post by: Robocorn on August 11, 2010, 10:36:12 pm
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 11, 2010, 10:40:12 pm
Post by: Robocorn on August 11, 2010, 10:47:42 pm
Here? "Works."at least without negator.
anyway, I'm going to replace OAR with CANNON because oars don't even exist.
tally ho
Works, if your not ashamed of having a fortress that in it's coding is named failoar.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 11, 2010, 10:49:33 pm
...On second thought, do it.
Post by: SethCreiyd on August 11, 2010, 11:05:33 pm
Spoiler: From Wikipedia, another stonefly pic. (click to show/hide)
To continue melkorp's tie-in continuity, I've borrowed his crossover mechanic, so if anyone is interested, the misadventures of Creiydrek continue on in Cavebrands (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=52116.msg1476366#msg1476366).
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 11, 2010, 11:47:12 pm
Change POISON. That way all the Stozus of the world will remind us of our purpose and our predecessors.
Post by: SethCreiyd on August 11, 2010, 11:54:39 pm
Code: [Select]
[WORD:OAR]
[NOUN:oar:oars]
[FRONT_COMPOUND_NOUN_SING]
[REAR_COMPOUND_NOUN_SING]
[THE_COMPOUND_NOUN_SING]
[THE_NOUN_SING]
[REAR_COMPOUND_NOUN_PLUR]
[THE_COMPOUND_NOUN_PLUR]
[THE_NOUN_PLUR]
[OF_NOUN_PLUR]Change that to this
Code: [Select]
[WORD:OAR]
[NOUN:cannon:cannons]
[FRONT_COMPOUND_NOUN_SING]
[REAR_COMPOUND_NOUN_SING]
[THE_COMPOUND_NOUN_SING]
[THE_NOUN_SING]
[REAR_COMPOUND_NOUN_PLUR]
[THE_COMPOUND_NOUN_PLUR]
[THE_NOUN_PLUR]
[OF_NOUN_PLUR]for instant awesome.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 11, 2010, 11:56:13 pm
We still have the nonissue of Mrs. Shakecannons.
Post by: Robocorn on August 12, 2010, 12:34:34 am
I'll post it and leave it if nobody wants any other non major mods. I'm going to give nickel silver an obscene modifier because there is no longer any way to produce it.
Post by: LizardKing on August 12, 2010, 09:21:01 am
Wow.
I'm really surprised you managed to hold out for so long despite all the insanity. The combination of thorough documentation, masterwork journals and some bizarre outbreaks of madness and horror made it a wonderful read. I saulte you all.
Post by: magicwalker on August 12, 2010, 03:06:22 pm
Now.. to compile the story and fan fiction on a page that doesn't have all the out of character chatter.
Post by: cappstv on August 12, 2010, 03:13:04 pm
Fun read.Or you could just use the handy dandy links
Now.. to compile the story and fan fiction on a page that doesn't have all the out of character chatter.
Post by: nonobots on August 12, 2010, 04:49:59 pm
My favourite part is definitely the tantrum spiral that almost got the fortress. That was an awesome recovery. How the two-miners-that-got-stuck bug got explained and participated in the story. The FAILCANNON was awesomely FUN.
That last FB was definitely the gods trying to solve Andreus' soul imbalance.
Anybody still trying to make a reclaim work or is that completely impossible?
Congratulation to everyone who participated.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 12, 2010, 05:18:52 pm
Post by: Pisano on August 13, 2010, 12:05:12 pm
Post by: SethCreiyd on August 17, 2010, 11:16:19 pm
Any advice on dealing with Stuzang?
Post by: Lucus Casius on August 17, 2010, 11:22:39 pm
Slightly (slightly) more seriously, try throwing adventurer after adventurer at him. Might actually get lucky.
Post by: Zathel on August 18, 2010, 11:02:23 am
And, remember to write in how and why we can make blocks out of bone now. Recovery of Alchemist's notes perhaps?
Post by: Glacial on August 18, 2010, 11:25:50 am
The turn list could continue on from Andreus, for everyone that's interested in it. I'd like to start things off with a prologue adventure quest to Battlefailed as seen in the final save, if that's okay with everyone, I downloaded 'Battlefailed_TheEnd.zip,' and just need to do the cannon-oar word swap and raise the value of the now-highly-rare nickel silver.
Continuing with the current turn order sounds like a plan. I agree with Zathel about including the bone block discovery -- I hope we can create an actual dwarven alchemist in the sequel.
I'm sure we all look forward to seeing what you put together!
Post by: Robocorn on August 18, 2010, 12:44:29 pm
Any advice on dealing with Stuzang?
create a long winding secondary entrance that is equipped with a ballista, with any luck you'll be able to shoot him with a few giant bolts before he goes down.
Get the body, make a forgotten beast chitin coat.
Post by: Andreus on August 19, 2010, 08:41:54 am
Post by: Zathel on August 19, 2010, 08:45:05 am
Man, I really wish I'd at least been able to complete FAILCANNON PRIME :(
We were so close... so close...
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 19, 2010, 12:59:16 pm
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
If you guys like it I'll start a new thread.
Post by: Pisano on August 19, 2010, 06:24:43 pm
Post by: Lucus Casius on August 19, 2010, 06:38:33 pm
I'm calling a turn!
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 19, 2010, 08:16:17 pm
Post by: Robocorn on August 19, 2010, 08:23:41 pm
If you guys last a year I'll give you a link in the OP.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 19, 2010, 08:31:52 pm
Post by: Glacial on August 19, 2010, 10:21:12 pm
Also, I believe SethCreiyd has a prologue coming.
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 19, 2010, 10:33:06 pm
Post by: nordak on November 07, 2010, 03:47:05 pm
Post by: dragonshardz on November 07, 2010, 06:01:05 pm
This fort's impossible to reclaim - they just haven't updated it recently.
Post by: Korva on November 09, 2010, 10:35:23 am
Now, onwards to the sequel thread ...
Post by: masam on November 24, 2010, 01:41:17 am
Post by: dragonshardz on November 24, 2010, 03:46:11 am
Post by: Chagen46 on April 25, 2012, 12:48:01 pm
Bravo.
Fucking bravo.
I got to this thread from the Legends thread. Wow. I spent four days reading the whole thing. This was simultaneously awesome and mind-blowing. And hilarious.
Only in DF can something this epic happen.
Only in DF.
Post by: matioshka on January 03, 2013, 02:54:10 am
7th Malachite, 509
I meander into baseless speculation here, but it seems to me as if all dwarves are driven by some force that we are unable to resist, yet cannot quite understand or put our finger on. If, truly, that is so, then escaping beyond this force is surely the only way in which a postdwarven society could possibly flourish?
8th Galena, 509
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/19.png)
We've just had another possession. But what if it is in fact, us that are possessed?
(http://mxdcorp-radio.com/dwarf/Battlefailed/509/21.png)
You trying to break the fourth wall there?
Post by: laularukyrumo on January 03, 2013, 08:09:43 pm
Post by: Evondral on July 27, 2014, 02:09:00 pm
Post by: Spish on July 27, 2014, 08:42:32 pm
Post by: Evondral on July 27, 2014, 11:26:37 pm
Fortunately, Deathsword took it upon himself to diligently archive the Battlefailed saga in it's entirety. Here is the .pdf from the Horrorfailed OP. (https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/18216514/BATTLEFAILED.pdf) The .doc link appears to have broken.
Thanks an absolute ton, I was hoping this existed.
Post by: FearfulJesuit on March 29, 2015, 04:45:19 pm
Post by: Zuglarkun on March 30, 2015, 01:15:01 am
1220 pages total. Images should be intact as far as I know.
Uploaded to DFFD.
http://dffd.bay12games.com/file.php?id=10721 (http://dffd.bay12games.com/file.php?id=10721)
Post by: guska on September 24, 2017, 07:59:18 pm
http://dffd.bay12games.com/file.php?id=13103