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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2124855 times)

Splint

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6630 on: July 13, 2012, 01:25:48 am »
That measn someon is gonna lose a walking limb or suffer motor nerve damage in a foot. Can you not see it?
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Ironlion

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6631 on: July 13, 2012, 04:18:05 am »
Oh yes, and when that time comes I'll have the happiest crutchwalker ever.
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Other monsters crowded around me, continually attacking.  I treated them politely, offering the edge of my razor-sharp sword; but the feast, I think, did not please them.

Lolfail0009

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6632 on: July 13, 2012, 05:54:57 am »
Remove a dwarf's leg, leave it to rot and then replace the lost bones!

Anyway, I had my very first vampire, not counting the Scarlet sisters and the students at Cross Academy [lol, anime], who drained the blood out of my fisherdwarf. I decided this would be a prime time to find out how !!JUSTICE!! worked.

I then immediately imprisoned the first dwarf on my list - my Legendary +5 Miner, for 198 days as a murder suspect  >:(. The vampire decided to kill everyone else, and when she went for the miner:

SWISH!   ;) CLUNK!  :D

Brained by the dwarf who took your place, b****. 8)
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WillowLuman

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6633 on: July 13, 2012, 11:39:20 am »
Quote from: Lolfail0009 on July 13, 2012, 05:54:57 am
Remove a dwarf's leg, leave it to rot and then replace the lost bones!
Hasn't worked that way for a loooooooong time.
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Dwarf Souls: Prepare to Mine
Keep Me Safe - A Girl and Her Computer (Illustrated Game)
Darkest Garden - Illustrated game. - What mysteries lie in the abandoned dark?

BinaryBeast1010011010

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6634 on: July 13, 2012, 12:01:59 pm »
My civ : the molten bodice...
First artifact : a marble bed.
And now my thong wearing mayor is SO happy
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cant stop playing DF?
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Joben

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6635 on: July 13, 2012, 12:29:06 pm »
Some restraints and a whip next to the bed. :P
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Broken Arrow - A small stats tweak to fix unrealistically overpowered arrows and bolts.

My RTD games: Roll To Raptor (On hold), Dino Arena

Cheesoburgor

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6636 on: July 13, 2012, 04:12:37 pm »
Quote from: BinaryBeast1010011010 on July 13, 2012, 12:01:59 pm
My civ : the molten bodice...
First artifact : a marble bed.
And now my thong wearing mayor is SO happy
urist.mc.mayor has been found dead completely drained of blood
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Im alive again after a 4 year break!

BinaryBeast1010011010

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6637 on: July 13, 2012, 05:05:40 pm »
funny enough, before I lost the fort to tantrum spiral (in defense mod, I was half way equiping my squad in masterwork steel everything) I was training a near legendary armorer when one of the legendary miners got snuffed. I decided to wait and see, then selected the armorer to check his preferences and then :
ex general, ex grand oracle, ex ex ex ex of half page of civs and govs...
I jailed the sucker in the arena then smelted his two masterwork steel helms just to make him cry and go berserk... training dummy for the marksdwarves...
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cant stop playing DF?
 : (){ :|:& };:

Cheesoburgor

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6638 on: July 13, 2012, 05:12:57 pm »
Quote from: BinaryBeast1010011010 on July 13, 2012, 05:05:40 pm
funny enough, before I lost the fort to tantrum spiral (in defense mod, I was half way equiping my squad in masterwork steel everything) I was training a near legendary armorer when one of the legendary miners got snuffed. I decided to wait and see, then selected the armorer to check his preferences and then :
ex general, ex grand oracle, ex ex ex ex of half page of civs and govs...
I jailed the sucker in the arena then smelted his two masterwork steel helms just to make him cry and go berserk... training dummy for the marksdwarves...
did they start tantruming because of their loved vampire pet died?
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Im alive again after a 4 year break!

BinaryBeast1010011010

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6639 on: July 13, 2012, 05:32:16 pm »
Yeah, I thought they would go apeshit about the miner's death since he was here from the beginning of the fort but as he was always lost in remote tunnels digging for glory, his death went unnoticed (ha? the creepy guy died? serves him well!)...
but when they lost THAT bloodsucking f(r)iend to tragedy...
the hunter was the first to snap... He interrupted his meal halfway through his masterwork roast, drew his crossbow, shot the legendary cook in the head, and started to loose at the bystanders... by the time the militia got there four dwarves laid in pools of blood and roasted tallow... after that there was a chase in the tree farm, tough luck the game was a warrior with one of the masterwork battle axes. he ran around (one z level of cleared soil is flippin big when there is a psycho with a battleaxe to find and dispatch) took on the militia men one by one then got shot... with only two survivors in the militia I decided to sit back and eat my dinner watching it...

I must add that soundsense is a great thing to have...
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cant stop playing DF?
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Cheesoburgor

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6640 on: July 13, 2012, 05:49:46 pm »
berserk dwarf's mind in a nutshell
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Im alive again after a 4 year break!

misko27

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6641 on: July 13, 2012, 05:54:05 pm »
Quote from: Cheesoburgor on July 13, 2012, 05:49:46 pm
berserk dwarf's mind in a nutshell
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Now, Theres an Idea I hadn't thought of.
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The Age of Man is over. It is the Fire's turn now

HavingPhun

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6642 on: July 13, 2012, 10:38:34 pm »
Urist mcmilitiacommander: The goblin siegers are coming! Close the gates!!!
Urist McBroker: Hurry! before they steal my socks!  :'( There mine! ALL MINE!!!!!!!  :o
Im tired.
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Hanslanda

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6643 on: July 13, 2012, 11:11:51 pm »
Find a beautiful site for a fort, with a volcano, little bit of mountains, no aquifer, stream.
Sweet, civ name, Wheels of war. Fuck yes.
Prepare carefully.
Alright. Hmm. Let's hit 'v'... Oh shit that was 'e'.
You have arrived!
FUUUUUUUUUUU-
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Quote from: MaximumZero on March 12, 2013, 01:02:21 am
Well, we could put two and two together and write a book: "The Shit that Hans and Max Did: You Won't Believe This Shit."
Quote from: Devling on April 04, 2013, 09:57:15 pm
He's fucking with us.

k9wazere

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6644 on: July 14, 2012, 10:46:29 am »
Best face-palm moment I had, was in setting up an atom smashing trap for zombies. After putting a cat in an airlock as bait, I linked all the bridges to pressure plates and got ready to let the zombies in.

Then I order the level flipped, sit back, and watch the zombies enter. They immediately path up the access tunnel I'd forgotten to seal off, bypassing all the traps, and eat the kitten. Also I had no way of flushing them out of the system so the whole project was abandoned :p
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