(http://www.the-iss.com/The%20Master.png)
Alright, I'm the King of Hell!.. wait... what's this... She?
...this is because your dwarf was female in my fortress, wasn't it?
Oh. How surprising. Undead wildlife kill someone. At least it wasn't me this time.This proves that Hellcannon is the true successor to Failcannon.
Deathsword is dead. I, Mego, must say that I am not amused by what I saw in this journal. Urist has sealed of the entrances, both to the surface and the caverns, so we are safe for the moment. The Master, however, is quite unhappy with all this. She never handled stress well, and I fear she may end up snapping.QUICK, CHANGE MY PROFESSION TO LORD AND MASTER!
Actually, I changed your profession to "The Mistress" thus resulting in: "The Master, The Mistress"Deathsword is dead. I, Mego, must say that I am not amused by what I saw in this journal. Urist has sealed of the entrances, both to the surface and the caverns, so we are safe for the moment. The Master, however, is quite unhappy with all this. She never handled stress well, and I fear she may end up snapping.QUICK, CHANGE MY PROFESSION TO LORD AND MASTER!
Murderous skeletal wildundeath √
Ghosts √
Undead in places they don't belong √
Not even year two yet √
Yup, it's a Battlefailed game.
Holy fuck people, you act like the Battlefailed trilogy is epic or something.
We were attacked by skeletal muskoxen (?). We were alerted by the dying sounds of a dog. Conchobar charged them, axe at the ready, but was smashed against the snow, ThatAussieDwarf and gamewizardinnc soon followed.
Deathsword is dead. I, Mego, must say that I am not amused by what I saw in this journal. Urist has sealed of the entrances, both to the surface and the caverns, so we are safe for the moment. The Master, however, is quite unhappy with all this. She never handled stress well, and I fear she may end up snapping.
Add me to the list, if you could. If I don't sign up now, chances are I'll wait 9 months for a turn.
If That Aussie Dwarf is dead, can we have him slip back 'in disguise' as a new dwarf? His ingenious plan will come to fruition!... Whatever it may be
MagmaMcFry - Noble - High Priest of Inconvenience - Likes magma for the painful death it will cause himHey, I'm trying to contribute to chaos here! Also, stop solving problems, because that would be convenient, therefore not Fun.
Why did we have to make something so immensely popular, and what the hell was I thinking when I decided to run the third incarnation?
By the way - did we ever settle on how exactly this fort proceeds from the previous?
I am going to regret this someday.
Dwarf me and give me a turn.
This will be my first Succession Fort, so I think this will be interesting. If it isn't interesting... then I will make it interesting.
Wasn't it a universe-level reset?
And CatalystParadox, are you ok with me sigging that quote of yours? And would you like your name on it? :P
Dont think you read what happened to the other forts.
Always! Proud to be in signatures, always. Which quote, btw?
Always! Proud to be in signatures, always. Which quote, btw?
The two of yours in his signature.
Merchants came, refused a deal with 200 dorfbucks gain and decided to leave. So I un-built the depot and stole their stuff. We need that booze and metal! (especially since I have yet to find a vein)
Btw, I'd like my custom profession to be...
The Great.
So is the aquifer a big problem?
Or we could just channel down to the aquifer and expose it to the elements. After all, this is a freezing embark.
I know who. THE ELVES!Or we could just channel down to the aquifer and expose it to the elements. After all, this is a freezing embark.
Who wouldn't want free constant exploitable power with which to drive Hellish engines of destruction that lay waste to dwarf and demon alike?
(also, who says I died in the first place? There was no one else around to see it... :o)
Added, and modified the dorfing list a bit. Since I will be crafting a storyline for this fort, there are some dorfs that need to be continually redorfed at the first opportunity. So far, it's Andreus (of course), ThatAussieDwarf, and myself, but the list is subject to change.
The storyline probably will not be massive. I'm just shooting for an epic explanation of why Hellcannon is Battlefailed 3.
Does the (unspoiledundwarven) Ocean of Slime extend under Hellcannon?
Gizogin, somehow, I missed you on the perpetual redorfing list. Also, the save is in the first post, if you want to crack it open.Okay, I did that. Looking at the thoughts/preferences screen, I have some very minor issues:
I wasn't the one who dorfed you. Take your issue up with Deathsword.Noted.
Added, and modified the dorfing list a bit. Since I will be crafting a storyline for this fort, there are some dorfs that need to be continually redorfed at the first opportunity. So far, it's Andreus (of course), ThatAussieDwarf, and myself, but the list is subject to change.
The storyline probably will not be massive. I'm just shooting for an epic explanation of why Hellcannon is Battlefailed 3.
What they carving the C with? Their beards?
Living migrants are rather scarce at Hellcannon, so I dorfed people as whatever dwarfs that made past the skoxes and skelks.Yeah, I did actually notice that almost all of the dwarfs in Hellcannon are female.
Just pretend you are a crossdresser if it bothers you so much.Living migrants are rather scarce at Hellcannon, so I dorfed people as whatever dwarfs that made past the skoxes and skelks.Yeah, I did actually notice that almost all of the dwarfs in Hellcannon are female.
We're having the same problem that Aussie did in Swordthunders.
Or, if you're a male dwarf, you fail to see any problem.
Not at all. That's what that list is there for.
Mego I read your post as ," Swimming through 7/7 kittens and beating the shit out of magma with a leather backpack."That sounds even more awesome.
Mego I read your post as ," Swimming through 7/7 kittens and beating the shit out of magma with a leather backpack."
Blargle flargle flargle. I added that so it would be less work for me, and now it is making more work. Fine, I'll add you, but from now on, if anyone wants continual redorfing, they have to prove their epicness by swimming through 7/7 magma and beating the shit out of a kitten with a leather backpack.
Blargle flargle flargle. I added that so it would be less work for me, and now it is making more work. Fine, I'll add you, but from now on, if anyone wants continual redorfing, they have to prove their epicness by swimming through 7/7 magma and beating the shit out of a kitten with a leather backpack.
Thanks.
I do wonder if there is a way to force a siege/ambush through a magma bath...
Perhaps if it was only 1-2/7?
Make a looooong corridor with a pressure plate at the end which dumps magma onto the corridor when stepped on and opens drains when released.
Blargle flargle flargle. I added that so it would be less work for me, and now it is making more work. Fine, I'll add you, but from now on, if anyone wants continual redorfing, they have to prove their epicness by swimming through 7/7 magma and beating the shit out of a kitten with a leather backpack.
Thanks.
I do wonder if there is a way to force a siege/ambush through a magma bath...
Perhaps if it was only 1-2/7?
Blargle flargle flargle. I added that so it would be less work for me, and now it is making more work. Fine, I'll add you, but from now on, if anyone wants continual redorfing, they have to prove their epicness by swimming through 7/7 magma and beating the shit out of a kitten with a leather backpack.
Thanks.
I do wonder if there is a way to force a siege/ambush through a magma bath...
Perhaps if it was only 1-2/7?
Do I need to point out that goblins path to the quickest way into your base? if that were to involve a floorhatch out of a sealable checkerboard-like pattern from outside...
Blargle flargle flargle. I added that so it would be less work for me, and now it is making more work. Fine, I'll add you, but from now on, if anyone wants continual redorfing, they have to prove their epicness by swimming through 7/7 magma and beating the shit out of a kitten with a leather backpack.
Thanks.
I do wonder if there is a way to force a siege/ambush through a magma bath...
Perhaps if it was only 1-2/7?
Do I need to point out that goblins path to the quickest way into your base? if that were to involve a floorhatch out of a sealable checkerboard-like pattern from outside...
Blargle flargle flargle. I added that so it would be less work for me, and now it is making more work. Fine, I'll add you, but from now on, if anyone wants continual redorfing, they have to prove their epicness by swimming through 7/7 magma and beating the shit out of a kitten with a leather backpack.
Thanks.
I do wonder if there is a way to force a siege/ambush through a magma bath...
Perhaps if it was only 1-2/7?
Do I need to point out that goblins path to the quickest way into your base? if that were to involve a floorhatch out of a sealable checkerboard-like pattern from outside...
Please dorf me. I prefer to be in the military, but if that's not possible, any profession will do. Name: Rurik.
That was a large migration wave for this early, what caused that?
The following were dorfed in the next wave.What.
The following were not dorfed because of complete lack of dorfs:
I think it's like "These guys weren't dorfed because there weren't enough dwarves left Oh hey, more dwarves."Yes, that's what I meant. I edited it after the second migrant wave. So, about what's actually going on...
The Master tantrums and punches Gizogin, killing him instantly.
Did you change my stats?
Out of curiosity, what skill did I fail?
I ALWAYS KNEW I WAS INSANE!!! :D*thumbs up*
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFldBVWFgWo RELEVANCE!!!!Out of curiosity, what skill did I fail?
Not getting kicked in the head.
EPICNESShttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFldBVWFgWo RELEVANCE!!!!Out of curiosity, what skill did I fail?
Not getting kicked in the head.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFldBVWFgWo RELEVANCE!!!!Out of curiosity, what skill did I fail?
Not getting kicked in the head.
MomuzC kills MagmaMcFry.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFldBVWFgWo RELEVANCE!!!!Out of curiosity, what skill did I fail?
Not getting kicked in the head.
I probably won't be the 13th player with the Curse of Failcannon likely hanging in the air like a particularly pungent dog fart.
Fuck it, I'll worry about updating that post tomorrow.
Fuck it, I'll worry about updating that post tomorrow.
Mwahahaha. It's only started.
Also, dorf request:
Urist Imiknorris - Captain of the Guard/Sheriff - Axecutioner - Gimme an axe. A good one.
Fun Fact:Just curious. Though I doubt the hot part due to where the new fort is biome-wise...
This world was genned remarkably hot and dry, with the maximum number of titans and an unreasonably low set parameter for attracting their attention (around population of 30 I think).
If it does die on my term, then I will blame the previous overseer(s) for screwing it over beforehand, as any proper politician should. If it happens on year 13 anyway, despite it not being my turn, then it probably wasn't my fault. Probably.I'll do my best to not be blameable for the fall of Hellcannon, then.
Hey, I was wondering when this new world was genned was it genned with the extra conditions of the original Aluonra?Fun Fact:Just curious. Though I doubt the hot part due to where the new fort is biome-wise...
This world was genned remarkably hot and dry, with the maximum number of titans and an unreasonably low set parameter for attracting their attention (around population of 30 I think).
(it was .03 right?)
Can I get a look at my dwarf's personality, please?
I opened the fort a bit. Should make it more efficient.Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Fort population?
Whose ghost is that? Is it mine? It'd be awesome if it were mine.
Can I see NotThatAussieDwarf's personality? Curious to see what his latest 'disguise' is like
Can I get a look at my dwarf's personality, please?Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Hey, I was wondering when this new world was genned was it genned with the extra conditions of the original Aluonra?Fun Fact:
This world was genned remarkably hot and dry, with the maximum number of titans and an unreasonably low set parameter for attracting their attention (around population of 30 I think).
Mego, the Dorfing list must be updated.
I was about to do that, but SOMEONE got pushy about the dorfing list, so I'm working on that instead.
*glares at peskyninja*
Wait, so I'm simultaneously a ghost and a newborn baby?
...sweet. I really couldn't have asked for more.
Wait, so I'm simultaneously a ghost and a newborn baby?
...sweet. I really couldn't have asked for more.
Does your life have meaning now?
You know whats odd? Nothing really interesting has happened yet. This seems to be the most successful fort in the Battlefailed triology so far... We need to design a megaproject now.
Filled with BOOZE!
I did promise to draw up plans for an obsidian machine gun...
(save clearing out the 'fired' obsidian, of course)
(save clearing out the 'fired' obsidian, of course)
Drop it into the magma sea. SMR eats cave-ins.
(save clearing out the 'fired' obsidian, of course)
Drop it into the magma sea. SMR eats cave-ins.
But then how will you use it to kill things if it just drops straight into the magma sea? Make it fire down into an unsupported section of flooring that's set over the top of the magma?
Obsidian machine gun: Awesome
Magma cannon: Good
Obsidian machine gun that can fire magma and water: Mind=Blown
Oh, and thanks Emerald for reminding me just who is conducting this fortress. I'm sorry if my post sounded a tad insulting, but it was like 3 in the morning when I typed that.
Oh, and thanks Emerald for reminding me just who is conducting this fortress. I'm sorry if my post sounded a tad insulting, but it was like 3 in the morning when I typed that.
Don't worry, it'll get far more interesting when the flying tigerwomen show up to taunt the metalworkers. :P
Mego, you did download the vanilla version of the file, right? No mysteriously flying tigermen or uber trolls for us to worry about? :o
Regardless, I like the idea of sticking with the cannon theme. Battlefailed had FAILCANNON. Failcannon was a cannon that fired pissed-off ghosts and mentally-shattered FB's. I have a storyline idea that could involve the cannon. Make sure Catalyst and I are the ones building it.
a) Coffins are emptied when deconstructed.
b) Falling objects don't injure creatures (except for stonefall traps).
a) Coffins are emptied when deconstructed.
b) Falling objects don't injure creatures (except for stonefall traps).
Yes, I downloaded vanilla. No need to worry about flying tigermen. Just the magma-eating FB-syndrome-shitting vampire/werewolf hybrids
It's a tundra. That means a lot of snow-covered rock. No ice unless you pump water up.
What if the uninvited guest can swim?
If the drowning doesn't work, just re-freeze the water.
Can I be the only armorer in the fort?
I'm a immortal being, I carry the knowledge of protection and I want to share this knowledge, but I need a great tomb and a bedroom to do so.(The tomb must have enough space for my other bodies.)
Can I be the only armorer in the fort?
I'm a immortal being, I carry the knowledge of protection and I want to share this knowledge, but I need a great tomb and a bedroom to do so.(The tomb must have enough space for my other bodies.)
This sounds like a noble to me. He shall be the first to test the magma cannon/moat!
Flash-freeze nobles, carve statues, place statues lining the entry into the fortress from the surface. Create a lane of nobsicles to show any immigrating noble we mean business. And by business we mean ice.
Flash-freeze nobles, carve statues, place statues lining the entry into the fortress from the surface. Create a lane of nobsicles to show any immigrating noble we mean business. And by business we mean ice.
And by ice we mean MAGMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Flash-freeze nobles, carve statues, place statues lining the entry into the fortress from the surface. Create a lane of nobsicles to show any immigrating noble we mean business. And by business we mean ice.
And by ice we mean MAGMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
No, just ice.
I JUST WANT AOPULENT TOMBMAGMA FLOW ROUTED THROUGH MY CHAMBERS!
I'd like to request a turn and to be dorfed.
Name: reteip9
Labours: siege engineering and mechanics
Proffession: Crazy Scientist
FOR THE SAKE OF WHAT IS LEFT OF MY SANITY AFTER ATTEMPTING SUPER KAIZO WORLD:
If you wish to be dorfed (or moved to the perpetual list if you're already on there), please put your request in the form that you see in the third post.
Fuck it, I'll worry about updating that post tomorrow.
I'd like to request a turn and to be dorfed.
Name: reteip9
Labours: siege engineering and mechanics
Proffession: Crazy Scientist
rghaskjdhasdjfgkasdfgsdhyujkfhwuiyefjefrghjsd
Reading posts is great.FOR THE SAKE OF WHAT IS LEFT OF MY SANITY AFTER ATTEMPTING SUPER KAIZO WORLD:
If you wish to be dorfed (or moved to the perpetual list if you're already on there), please put your request in the form that you see in the third post.
Fuck it, I'll worry about updating that post tomorrow.
Now my sanity is gone from playing Super Metroid Impossible.
Fucking bomb jumps.
Ovus Frothysuckers
Ovus Frothysuckers
Best. God. Ever.
On a more serious note, we have 8 drinks left and the still was sitting idle. I've enabled brewing. I knew you guys were mad and sadistic, but come on people.
On a more serious note, we have 8 drinks left and the still was sitting idle. I've enabled brewing. I knew you guys were mad and sadistic, but come on people.
On a more serious note, we have 8 drinks left and the still was sitting idle. I've enabled brewing. I knew you guys were mad and sadistic, but come on people.
There was a... barrel shortage during my turn, I'm afraid. There is, however, a well.
And we now have the god of succession games.
Wow. Mego, I pray you never discover I Wanna Be The Guy; The Movie, The Game...
Could I be added to the continual redorf list?
Wow. Mego, I pray you never discover I Wanna Be The Guy; The Movie, The Game...
I have played and beaten it. On Medium, mind you, I'm not completely mad. I am a challenge gamer.
Let's not discuss what happened during the 2 weeks it took me to beat it.
Wait, my dwarf, I mean Not My Dwarf, is the new militia commander? Better than I expected...
Wait, my dwarf, I mean Not My Dwarf, is the new militia commander? Better than I expected...
If you didn't expect it... it wasn't according to plan. Unless you expected the unexpected and had no real intention of achieving the plan you planned to be usurped by an unexpected turn of events that was all according to plan anyway.
So, apart from those visible, who else got roped into the squad?
Obviously Aussie's master plan is a series of concurrent Xanatos Roulettes.
I wonder how long it will be before wildlife eats me. :)
Looking at the layout plans for housing brings up to things two my mind.
First is that in the mind of a seasoned veteran of DF, this is an okay solution for housing all the dwarves and later on, once proper rooms are ready to be dug within stone, this whole area can be converted into a massive treefarm, saving us the trouble of ever again having to brave the depths!
Second is that I wonder how many years will the entire population be forced to live on this soil-layer, when the ones planned within stone inevitably end up flooded, either with magma or water, or housing some forgotten monstrosity or a whole bunch of skeletal horrors or something.
I'm betting on 12.
Looking at the layout plans for housing brings up to things two my mind.
First is that in the mind of a seasoned veteran of DF, this is an okay solution for housing all the dwarves and later on, once proper rooms are ready to be dug within stone, this whole area can be converted into a massive treefarm, saving us the trouble of ever again having to brave the depths!
Second is that I wonder how many years will the entire population be forced to live on this soil-layer, when the ones planned within stone inevitably end up flooded, either with magma or water, or housing some forgotten monstrosity or a whole bunch of skeletal horrors or something.
I'm betting on 12.
Okay, seeing as the original Mekboy got killed, can I be redorfed?
Name: Mekboy
Profession: Medical dwarf
Custom job title: Not a body snatching mad scientist.
How's Reudh fairing? Personality wise, recent happenings, if I could see them... Would be tremenjous.
Looking at the layout plans for housing brings up to things two my mind.
First is that in the mind of a seasoned veteran of DF, this is an okay solution for housing all the dwarves and later on, once proper rooms are ready to be dug within stone, this whole area can be converted into a massive treefarm, saving us the trouble of ever again having to brave the depths!
Second is that I wonder how many years will the entire population be forced to live on this soil-layer, when the ones planned within stone inevitably end up flooded, either with magma or water, or housing some forgotten monstrosity or a whole bunch of skeletal horrors or something.
I'm betting on 12.
12 because that's how many years will have passed between now and the end of Eric Blank's turn?
All we have left are, I think, an herbalist, a stoneworker and a herd of children. Hopefully we'll get some good survivors once immigrants start arriving.
I suggest planning on a Megaproject already so that we are prepared for when the fail is scheduled to happen.
Whaaaaat. So the failcannon and Faillever were elfy?I suggest planning on a Megaproject already so that we are prepared for when the fail is scheduled to happen.
I knew you were an elf.
DO NOT BLASPHEME!Whaaaaat. So the failcannon and Faillever were elfy?I suggest planning on a Megaproject already so that we are prepared for when the fail is scheduled to happen.
I knew you were an elf.
Hey look, I found it!DO NOT BLASPHEME!Whaaaaat. So the failcannon and Faillever were elfy?I suggest planning on a Megaproject already so that we are prepared for when the fail is scheduled to happen.
I knew you were an elf.
DO NOT BLASPHEME!
[/dalek]
Wait, how did I end up with turn #14? Am I losing my place on the turn list in favor of playing the 13th year? I'd prefer to play sooner than later, honestly. 13 is still the unlucky number. I can feel it.Mormota got moved down a few turns, so effectively you're still #13 because his first turn got skipped.
I think when Hellcannon falls, I'll do an adventurer exploring the ruins of it, like how Sankis Jr. explored the remains of Boatmurdered. :P
Sound good?
Given that Failcannon timeline/Aluonra is totally wrecked, I see no reason why we couldn't destrou a world again.
Related: my sig
Given that Battlefailed + Failcannon spanned versions 0.31.0...3? - 0.31.25 ... wow. Would it be fair to say, my fellow dorfs... that we destroyed DF2010? We should plan to adapt accordingly to future releases with Hellcannon, of course.
rose, john, feferi? WHO?!
That depends. Do you want topside patrol duty or cavern exploration duty? =P
About ten seconds after I unpaused, a huge migrant wave arrived, complete with a great heaping fuckload of animals. I'm tracking them as they're coming in, they should be enough to dorf pretty much everyone by my estimate. I'll make this a proper update when they're done arriving.
I'm currently dorfing everyone except Ghills, there was only one crazy cat lady and Ledi's claim is older. Otherwise, everyone on the dorfing list is getting a dorf. I didn't redorf anyone who died who isn't on the perpetual redorf list, but since we now have 63 people (as opposed to the 39 I started with), that shouldn't be a problem if so desired. Otherwise, I'll leave the anonymous population for future dorfing requests.
When/if Lord Reudh hits legendary in marksdwarf, could you make her into a marksdwarf militia captain? If you have it for that long. :D
Should make for interesting stories from the slightly-off dwarf that is me.
next overseer please Dorf somedorf as "Kaamanen" with custom profession "claustrofobic architect"
I'm going to be honest here, it'spretty bada massacre. All the militadorfs are named, and we're losing them left and right now. The muskskoxen were a pushover, but then some skelks appeared, turns out they're quite a bit more vicious than the muskskoxen.....
On the upside, this means that the lack of a sustainable food supply is less of a problem.
I remember typing that everything was going well. The game somehow found out. So naturally the place is going to hell in a handbasket.
I'm going to be honest here, it'spretty bada massacre. All the militadorfs are named, and we're losing them left and right now. The muskskoxen were a pushover, but then some skelks appeared, turns out they're quite a bit more vicious than the muskskoxen.....
On the upside, this means that the lack of a sustainable food supply is less of a problem.
I remember typing that everything was going well. The game somehow found out. So naturally the place is going to hell in a handbasket.
How am I doing? Did I kill anything?
Strategia, was Dariush dorfed?
Strategia, was Dariush dorfed?
Epic battle with skeletal wildlife? Is this Hellcannon or is this Headshoots?
Epic battle with skeletal wildlife? Is this Hellcannon or is this Headshoots?
Didn't Headshoots only have to deal with skeletal wildlife aboveground?
Let me guess: This thrilling suspense is related to what I assume is most likely due to one(or knowing these forts luck, both) of the walled cavern areas lacking a roof to keep flying nasties away.
So Deathsword the Younger is on his way to becoming Hellcannon's resident badass?
I htink the amount of objects that we haven't weaponized yet can be counted on somebody's fingers.
I fear for what's left of my soul, but I think I'll go to TVTropes and edit the Battlefailed page a bit to reflect Hellcannon's current status.Yay~
One of the skelks bites Phantom in the hand and shakes it viciously, tearing it to shreds. Phantom dies like many others, getting bowled over and kicked in the head.
How many are left? And since Thor was not mentioned I shall assume he is somewhat okay.
One of the skelks bites Phantom in the hand and shakes it viciously, tearing it to shreds. Phantom dies like many others, getting bowled over and kicked in the head.
Sounds about right. Any chance of a reincarnation (Phantom II - any random squaddie - Resident Coward).
On another note, I think one aspect of the original Aluonra was overlooked in genning this world - namely, the low threshold for titans, megabeasts, FBs and such. Battlefailed and Failcannon got these when they had a population of ~30 I think, Hellcannon currently has over 60 inhabitants and the greatest threats are the skanimals that lurk in the caverns.
Vursa doesn't mention in your writeup, there. Did she somehow survive this tragedy?
On another note, I think one aspect of the original Aluonra was overlooked in genning this world - namely, the low threshold for titans, megabeasts, FBs and such. Battlefailed and Failcannon got these when they had a population of ~30 I think, Hellcannon currently has over 60 inhabitants and the greatest threats are the skanimals that lurk in the caverns.
For the last time; the generation parameters were identical in every way to what I exported from the Aluonra save, except for the additions of new tags that didn't exist when it was generated and terrain data based on a map, so it got eroded a second time. Future, damnit!
If there hasn't been a good megabeast/titan/FB, it's because you've all been playing with invasions off, aren't making a compelling target for them, or are composed ofgoodbad-luck-stone and un-fun-metal.
Do we have any prisons set up by any chance? in the middle of the food stockpile? It sounds like they'll be needed...
The Sherriff/Captain of the Guard was beaten to a pulp by fellow dwarves, so we're not in any immediate risk of beatings.
I'll start picking up the pieces tomorrow, and that includes trying to rebuild at least some semblance of a military. I'll redorf you and anyone on the permadorf list then.
The Sherriff/Captain of the Guard was beaten to a pulp by fellow dwarves, so we're not in any immediate risk of beatings.
Aww.
I remember typing that everything was going well. The game somehow found out. So naturally the place is going to hell in a handbasket.
I remember typing that everything was going well. The game somehow found out. So naturally the place is going to hell in a handbasket.
It's almost like the game can read what you type. This seems like a good thread quote to start with.
Kaamanen is the first to fall, taking a shattering kick to the foot that temporarily stuns her, allowing the muskskox to tear off her right arm and kick her in the head twice. Alas poor Kaamanen, we hardly knew ye. Ye shall be remembered.
Waiting with excitement.I fear for what's left of my soul, but I think I'll go to TVTropes and edit the Battlefailed page a bit to reflect Hellcannon's current status.Yay~
Lw vhhpv wkdw pb dfwlrqv duh eulqjlqj rq d uhshdw ri wkh hyhqwv ri Edwwohidlohg, mxvw dv sodqqhg. Vrrq L zloo rqfh djdlq soxqjh wkh zruog lqwr gdunqhvv.
I'll take Nil.
Ide quite like to train up my minning skill later on if thats alright.
oh, and if you manage to make me legendary, use my miner uniform work around in my sig to make me head of a miner millita squad -sheilds and armour if you can manage them as well thank you- so that youve got a back up emergancy squad for when crap goes down inside the fort.
Other than that, thanks for listing all the dwarves ^^ a statue room or such would probably do good for the dwarves moods, or a golden path/road for them to walk over during their daily stuff.
Anything about my dwarf? Vain curiosity continues to pester me about it.
So I'm back. It seems that in my absence I've been promoted to an unstoppable force... That went better than expected. What are my kills so far? Also please dont take me off the militia. There have been plenty of dwarves able to kick ass. Though if you absolutely have to, I better be the best damn jeweler in the fortress.
Urist Imiknorris punches Karakzon and Eric Blank until both die. Creiydrek is now mayor.
...
Urist is beating random people for being criminals. With gusto.
Zeratul goes berserk. I send Urist in to kill him.
Urist Imiknorris punches Karakzon and Eric Blank until both die. Creiydrek is now mayor.
...
Urist is beating random people for being criminals. With gusto.
Zeratul goes berserk. I send Urist in to kill him.
Justice.
'Darvi' Sitalducim, Madman*punches self* STOP BEING SO MISERABLE!
In addition to some miscellaneous Rusty skills, some more useful (Competent Metalsmith), some less so (Skilled Swimmer), Mr. Darvi Westworks is a Great Brewer. It's in everyone's best interests if he stops being miserable.
And damnit, Urist, I said I was sorry!
And damnit, Urist, I said I was sorry!
It was just punishment for your crimes.
Darvi, I just noticed your avatar flashes the words "Don't Obey," in all caps every so often.
EDIT: Its eyes also change.
Darvi, I just noticed your avatar flashes the words "Don't Obey," in all caps every so often.
EDIT: Its eyes also change.
It's the effect of the batterwitch.
Darvi, I just noticed your avatar flashes the words "Don't Obey," in all caps every so often.
EDIT: Its eyes also change.
It's the effect of the batterwitch.
I'm sorry, but what the heck is a batterwitch?
Any sign of That Aussie Dwarf getting a redorfing/new disguise?
GEMS FOR THE KITTIES. THEY DEMAND THEIR SHINIES!
...Are there gems available or is Ledi VI going to end up on the dwarfing list soon? XD
MSPA is the new TvTropes (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TVTropesWillRuinYourLife).Darvi, I just noticed your avatar flashes the words "Don't Obey," in all caps every so often.
EDIT: Its eyes also change.
It's the effect of the batterwitch.
I'm sorry, but what the heck is a batterwitch?
See you in a month. (http://mspaintadventures.com)
MSPA is the new TvTropes (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TVTropesWillRuinYourLife).Darvi, I just noticed your avatar flashes the words "Don't Obey," in all caps every so often.
EDIT: Its eyes also change.
It's the effect of the batterwitch.
I'm sorry, but what the heck is a batterwitch?
See you in a month. (http://mspaintadventures.com)
If it's the destruction! Of! REALITY! ITSELF! then it's probably my plan :xBy this point I've accepted that I'm just along for the ride.
We're all just along for the ride. Dwarf Fortress is the one actually destroying reality. We're just innocent (or, in Aussie's case, not-so-innocent) bystanders.If it's the destruction! Of! REALITY! ITSELF! then it's probably my plan :xBy this point I've accepted that I'm just along for the ride.
I knew what I was doing when adding that one entry to the Battlefailed page.Which one was that?
I just had the most ridiculous idea, but it will only work if I'm right about this.
Will magma-immune creatures still get pushed by magma currents?
That will work. My plan:Spoiler: Hellcannon (click to show/hide)
I just had the most ridiculous idea, but it will only work if I'm right about this.Yes. All currents push things. I think magma flows more slowly, though.
Will magma-immune creatures still get pushed by magma currents?
for that to work, youde have to have an efficient multi magma sea feed and to build the pump stack up to a few z levels above the exit hole, so the pressure is at that Z level and erupts both magma and deamons.
That will work. My plan:Spoiler: Hellcannon (click to show/hide)
Won't the Fun people flying ability interfere with that?
He made a list with survivors. Just remove anybody who's not on it.
I've resigned myself to the fact that the fortress probably won't survive till my turn.
I've resigned myself to the fact that the fortress probably won't survive till my turn.
Oh, it will. Just barely and still soil-stuck, but it will.
Battlefailed was doomed to have malfunctioning super-weapons.
Failcannon was doomed to have such complex tunnels it screwed up with pathfinding
Hellcannon is doomed to stay in the soil layer, squeezed between hoofed skeletal monstrosities above and skull-biting monstrosities below.
Go Hellcannon!
I still think it should be callled Failhell...
As long as no skeletal giant badgers, skeletal carp or skeletal elephants appear, we're good.
As long as no skeletal giant badgers, skeletal carp or skeletal elephants appear, we're good.
I'm not sure that any of those show up in vanilla.
And now that I said that, Strategia will post that all 3 showed up at once and raped the fortress over. Twice.
QuoteThis is a quote pyramid. It is made from electrons and encircled with bands of hyperlinks. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality.Am I the only one not all that interested by it? MSPA I mean, TV Tropes is crack.
Meh. I got past the thing with the weird old-timey cop-show time-travel style thing, but I lost interest after that.
That sentence is a nightmare. Oh well, moving on.
Hellcannon is certainly doing well. (RARGH BACK ON THE RAILS)
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! NOW WE'RE JINXED FOR SURE!Then my work here is done.
I like that name, although I also liked the idea of having Fail in there for #4, like #2.Hellspent the Failed Cannon of Battles would work. Why is it most succession fortresses go with simple names? Is Auraaunt the Bald Awe-Inspiring Abbey of Ale to much to say in a single breath?
Wait this is too early to begin coming up with names for the next fortress. It's only the third year!
Randomnames the Alliterative Collection of The First Cool-Sounding Words You See When Scrolling Down The List Of Words To Use When Naming Your Fortress?I like that name, although I also liked the idea of having Fail in there for #4, like #2.Hellspent the Failed Cannon of Battles would work. Why is it most succession fortresses go with simple names? Is Auraaunt the Bald Awe-Inspiring Abbey of Ale to much to say in a single breath?
Wait this is too early to begin coming up with names for the next fortress. It's only the third year!
Zeratul goes berserk. I send Urist in to kill him. Zeratul murders Grov and Darvi in their sleep. Then he punches a sleeping Dariush, who promptly starts taking Zeratul apart with her pickaxe.Well, it was probably too much to hope for that I'd survive all the way until my turn. At least I took some people out with me, though. No rush redwarfing me, though, since I'll only get killed again. So long as I'm in there when my turn comes up, I'll be happy.
Elfbutcher the Dark Death-Ooze of Fail?
As for TV Tropes, re:above; I thought I was immune to it by now, but I just spent six straight hours staring at the bloody thing.Immunity to TvTropes is a rare and highly sought-after quality that can only be obtained by years of obsessive tab-abuse.
That would likely demand 100% of the dwarves' embark skills go into military skills, and that we bring shields and extra picks. Then assign labors after embark. But if something so insane succeeds, then it is truly blessed by the RNG.Elfbutcher the Dark Death-Ooze of Fail?
Dwarfbutcher the Fail of Fortresses, or maybe Battledwarf the Failfortress of Triumph. In which we finally manage to whup some skelk ass and establish a secure fortress on a frozen, savage, terrifying coast, right next door to a goblin fortress.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...
Ok i'm done.
Elfbutcher the Dark Death-Ooze of Fail?
Dwarfbutcher the Fail of Fortresses, or maybe Battledwarf the Failfortress of Triumph. In which we finally manage to whup some skelk ass and establish a secure fortress on a frozen, savage, terrifying coast, right next door to a goblin fortress.
That would likely demand 100% of the dwarves' embark skills go into military skills, and that we bring shields and extra picks. Then assign labors after embark. But if something so insane succeeds, then it is truly blessed by the RNG.Elfbutcher the Dark Death-Ooze of Fail?
Dwarfbutcher the Fail of Fortresses, or maybe Battledwarf the Failfortress of Triumph. In which we finally manage to whup some skelk ass and establish a secure fortress on a frozen, savage, terrifying coast, right next door to a goblin fortress.
Also, while I don't have total immunity to TVtropes, I still qualify as highly resistant. Never spend much time on it, and usually ignore links.
Also, roughly how many hostiles are on the map right now?
Would you say you had Insanity Immunity (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/InsanityImmunity)?
Now that was a good update. Hows the fortress looking at this point?
Also, roughly how many hostiles are on the map right now?
One Skeletal Blind Cave Ogre, at the bottom of the magma sea.
Sixteen skeletal crundles, apparently coming in through the second cavern layer.
One skeletal polar bear.
Seven skeletal reindeer.
One skeletal giant olm.
One skeletal giant toad.
Thirty-three dwarves.
OP-quoting this. I'll deal with dorfing requests and issues momentarily.
Like a perfectly pleasant little tundra fortress still busy getting its stuff together, that somebody painted a lovely shade of murder.
I'm an elf.
I'm also an elf.I also knew it.
The only fair solution to this is to murder both of you.
too late. you're already dead.*stares at Jadesprite-Avatar*
You messed up the link by Stratgia's name. It should be House of leaves.
You messed up the link by Stratgia's name. It should be House of leaves.
So, do all ghosts get a course in quantum mechanics when they die?
So, do all ghosts get a course in quantum mechanics when they die?I don't know about the others, but I certainly learned a few things at the University of the Damned.
Now if only English papers could go so smoothly...The answer to your conundrum can only be duct tape. Cover your paper in the stuff. Your professor will invariably tear the paper, or otherwise render it illegible trying to remove it. They can hardly claim that it's your fault that they ruined your work, and give you full credit. After all, they can't prove that it wasn't A+ material if they can't read it.
Or they could say that you need to turn in a readable paper.
Hey, that was uncalled for! Why can't you find something constructive to do, like help with the ongoing collapse of reality that you seem so worked up about?
Hey, that was uncalled for! Why can't you find something constructive to do, like help with the ongoing collapse of reality that you seem so worked up about?
I died soon after a series of bipolar flips between tantruming and being fine. Dying happened to flip me to tantruming again.
The place is descending into madness, dwarves are killing themselves and there's no sign of That Aussie Dwarf
All according to plan... probably.
Hopefully the thread won't die before the fortress does!
Hmmm... is it possible to scare (as in frighten, not intimidate) a future overseer using just the undocumented save?
Hmmm... is it possible to scare (as in frighten, not intimidate) a future overseer using just the undocumented save?
Are you kidding? Hellcannon's save strikes fear into the hearts of all who look at it. Merely mentioning its name causes quivers thought the world of dwarf fortress.
Speaking of which, about time to abandon my own irrevocable failure of a fortress.
Speaking of which, about time to abandon my own irrevocable failure of a fortress.
Speaking of which, about time to abandon my own irrevocable failure of a fortress.
That just gave me a cool idea for making Chaos Architecture applicable.
Meh, I was more amused letting the siege in. Killed everyone and wrecked the place. Blood and gore everywhere. Almost like it were Failcannon, without the ocean.Eric, if your fort was like FailCannon, it wouldn't be dead for "only" letting a siege in xDDD
If it were Failcannon, a siege butchering the population would constitute an event of minor interest that would barely be mentioned in comparison to the overseer's latest obsessive construction.
Wait, I've been helping STUZANG!!?!
This is bad.
It's not that I'm worried about Stuzang showing up, it's that I hate him (it?) and the idea of doing anything in his favor is abhorrent.Wait, I've been helping STUZANG!!?!
This is bad.
Nah, he will just get lost in the horrible, twisty passeges of doom that were created to level up a miner.
Meh, I was more amused letting the siege in. Killed everyone and wrecked the place. Blood and gore everywhere. Almost like it were Failcannon, without the ocean.
Meh, I was more amused letting the siege in. Killed everyone and wrecked the place. Blood and gore everywhere. Almost like it were Failcannon, without the ocean.
Sounds like you let it inside for the sake of nostalgia. I can understand that.
I fear I may be annoying everyone (especially Mego) with my failed dorfing requests, but i'll try again. D:
Reudh II - Bonecarver - Stoic - preferably to remain friendless; if that means burrowing him in his own little cloister, then cool!
DON'T WORRY...EVERY ONE OF US HAS HIS OWN INNER MADMAN.
I may have penetrated into the creature's core, while it itself is still relatively powerless, but its intrusions into the real world can yet harm me. Its primary avatar
a twisted stonefly
it comes
doom awaits
The Entity now
has a name
I will call it
Stuzang is coming
DON'T WORRY...EVERY ONE OF US HAS HIS OWN INNER MADMAN.
Using 18pt font, bold, red, and caps all at the same time makes me want to do things to you I usually reserve for my nobles.
... A bug primary avatar... A consciousness outside of the physical... feeding on small beings... Gentlemen... I believe... I have discovered the true horrors that lay in the darkness beyond the veil. This creature is IT. Stephen King is attempting to destroy our multiverse and replace it with his twisted Tower. He must be stopped at all costs. I'll need a minivan, two German Shepherds, a Stake and Cheese bagel from McDonald's, and one of those little refrigerators you need to open with a key.
DON'T WORRY...EVERY ONE OF US HAS HIS OWN INNER MADMAN.
Using 18pt font, bold, red, and caps all at the same time makes me want to do things to you I usually reserve for my nobles.
I think I can still spare a dwarf for that. I've saved at the beginning of Moonstone, I think, so I should have enough time to rig something up, provided people do what I tell them to do and ignore the skrundles visible from the staircase in the second cavern layer.... A bug primary avatar... A consciousness outside of the physical... feeding on small beings... Gentlemen... I believe... I have discovered the true horrors that lay in the darkness beyond the veil. This creature is IT. Stephen King is attempting to destroy our multiverse and replace it with his twisted Tower. He must be stopped at all costs. I'll need a minivan, two German Shepherds, a Stake and Cheese bagel from McDonald's, and one of those little refrigerators you need to open with a key.
Yet more I haven't read :-\ I'm really not much of a horror fan, it basically stops at Alien and John Carpenter's The Thing for me (and the latter is borderline).
I'm planning one more metaplot update, which will also likely contain the end-of-year save.
Dunno why, but Stephen King and McDonalds go together well in my mind. Make of that what you will.
Eh, Pennywise from IT was described as looking like Ronald McDonald in the book. Make of THAT what you will. :P
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Using 18pt font, bold, red, and caps all at the same time makes me want to do things to you I usually reserve for my nobles.
Using 18pt font, bold, red, and caps all at the same time makes me want to do things to you I usually reserve for my nobles.
Well...cooked fish would be nice...
Sorry for the triple posting,TIME TRAVEL NINJA POWERS ACTIVATE!
Very nice. So thus ends the fourth year of hellcannon's existence. You kept the fort alive after what I would say would be better called "The first battle of hellcannon" as there will surely be many many more.
Stuzang is Aussie Dwarf in disguise.
I just made up this, but then it would make a lot of sense (By a lot of sense, I mean in my headache-suffering brain, it does make sense now)
Meh, don't bother with Stephen King. IT was pretty good until the end (the movie actually doesn't do the full story any level of justice, but the endings are perfect matches). The books of his I read are interesting, but the ending is ALWAYS a cop-out. It is like he gets bored writing the book and finishes as quickly as possible. I'm not much of a horror fan either, but IT was more suspense than horror anyway... until it tries to become a cosmic horror story.
MMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmnnnnnnnnnrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrR.
I downloaded the save for a quick look, and it gave me one of those moments where I suddenly realize everything that's wrong with the world.
There seems to be a burning ogre sitting happily in the middle of the magma sea. I'm not sure what to make of that.
MMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmnnnnnnnnnrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrR.
I downloaded the save for a quick look, and it gave me one of those moments where I suddenly realize everything that's wrong with the world.
There seems to be a burning ogre sitting happily in the middle of the magma sea. I'm not sure what to make of that.
the first cavern layer is sealed off against anything that can't fly
can't fly
FLY
MMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmnnnnnnnnnrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrR.
Excellent... Did I get redorfed? If so, is he/she dead yet?
the first cavern layer is sealed off against anything that can't flycan't flyFLYMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmnnnnnnnnnrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrR.
Edit:Edit: I'm disappoint in you people. No Hotkeys! Shame on you.
Journal of Game, 16th Granite 206, Early Spring
Apparently the previous Overlords couldn’t see giant gaping holes in the floor and acknowledge the fact that everything can squeeze through a corner no matter how small unless there’s a 2 foot slab of rock behind it. I’ll point out these flaws in this picture:I’ve repaired most of these flaws at the time of the photo being taken.Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Any sign of That Aussie Dwarf in a new 'disguise'? Strategia mentioned he was going to do something, but I don't think he ever did (If I missed it, my bad)
So you want a dwarf called Not That Aussie Dwarf with the profession of Magnificent Bastard?
ThatNewZealandDwarfI very nearly said that. It was a toss up. That would have been awkward for us both. (Mustn't let down the curtain and reveal the puppet show, after all...)
I'm a magnificent bastard and am controlling the thoughts of everyone in the fortress.
Frawd Eissua Taht?I better not be the only one to notice that it's just "That Aussie Dwarf" backwards.
?yas uoy tahWQuoteFrawd Eissua Taht?I better not be the only one to notice that it's just "That Aussie Dwarf" backwards.
Eh syas Frawd Eissua Taht si Taht Eissua Frawd sdrawkcab. Tniauq, kniht uoy ton??yas uoy tahWQuoteFrawd Eissua Taht?I better not be the only one to notice that it's just "That Aussie Dwarf" backwards.
?yas uoy tahWQuoteFrawd Eissua Taht?I better not be the only one to notice that it's just "That Aussie Dwarf" backwards.
?yas uoy tahWQuoteFrawd Eissua Taht?I better not be the only one to notice that it's just "That Aussie Dwarf" backwards.
.amgam eht su pu tes ydobemoS
I am normally ok with moderate derailment. But, this backwards thing has gone too far. Pray that your dwarves aren't alive during my turn and I don't get a migrant wave with which to redwarf you.
THERE WILL BE HELL.
I ma yllamron ko htiw etaredom tnemliared. Tub, siht sdrawkcab gniht sah enog oot raf. Yarp taht ruoy sevrawd t'nera evila gnirud ym nrut dna I t'nod teg a tnargim evaw thiw hcihw ot frawder uoy.YFTF
EREHT LLIW EB LLEH.
Deathsword shall be the first punished. Tadpole will be the one doing the punishing.
Deathsword shall be the first punished. Tadpole will be the one doing the punishing.
Fun for everyone!
Deathsword shall be the first punished. Tadpole will be the one doing the punishing.
Fun for everyone!
No, only for me.
I am normally ok with moderate derailment. But, this backwards thing has gone too far. Pray that your dwarves aren't alive during my turn and I don't get a migrant wave with which to redwarf you.
THERE WILL BE HELL.
I am normally ok with moderate derailment. But, this backwards thing has gone too far. Pray that your dwarves aren't alive during my turn and I don't get a migrant wave with which to redwarf you.
THERE WILL BE HELL.
Reading for comprehension!
Truly, 'tis an underrated skill.I am normally ok with moderate derailment. But, this backwards thing has gone too far. Pray that your dwarves aren't alive during my turn and I don't get a migrant wave with which to redwarf you.Reading for comprehension!
THERE WILL BE HELL.
I think ToadyOne said something about saves not being compatible.
By that point, I'm sure someone has written how a dwarf became a manifestation of all chaos and creation, sending the world into a dimension not-so-different-than-their-own through a hole torn into reality upon their ascension to a higher level of existence, tearing the universe asunder during the chaotic first moments of their existence as a new god.I figured that was how FailCannon was going to end, but then it fell before .26 was done.
Holy shit, what's happening to this thread?
Nice. Hmm, can zombies stay members of their civilization? Undead Queen Led may be possible after all...
SEND IN THE CLOWNS! oh and MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAIMANELFHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAFun is going to ensue.
SEND IN THE CLOWNS! oh and MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAIMANELFHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Welp. Could be worse. Like, the next two guys on the list.
First Prime Minister of Britain, then President of the United States, and now this.Interesting note: My youngest brother, as both a natural born citizen of the U.S. and a lex sanguinis British citizen, could (theoretically, and to the best of my knowledge) become both the United States President and Prime Minister of Britain. I did a bit of research (read: I Googled it for a few minutes), and couldn't find anything that would prevent one from holding both positions.
oh you bastards...why did you make my dwarf have a gay marriage?! NO WONDER SHE/HE GOT KILLED!
odd actually, Dariush is the only named dwarf alive, but none of the others died on my turn!
Obviously the hospital is the most cheerful place on Hellcannon.
Why am I not surprised?
Obviously the hospital is the most cheerful place on Hellcannon.
Why am I not surprised?
"Bomrek, quick! Wave at that bowgoblin and get an arrow in your spleen! Once you're in the hospital the Overseer can't send you out into danger anymore!"
Obviously the hospital is the most cheerful place on Hellcannon.
Why am I not surprised?
"Bomrek, quick! Wave at that bowgoblin and get an arrow in your spleen! Once you're in the hospital the Overseer can't send you out into danger anymore!"
It's a legitimate strategy!
Gentlemen, everyone, EVERYONE IS DEAD, but there's one problem, IT DIDN'T ABANDON! IT'S TRUE, THE SAVE IS CURSED!!! THERE'S NO ONE LEFT ALIVE, I CHECKED, BUT IT'S NOT ABANDONED!
Gentlemen, everyone, EVERYONE IS DEAD, but there's one problem, IT DIDN'T ABANDON! IT'S TRUE, THE SAVE IS CURSED!!! THERE'S NO ONE LEFT ALIVE, I CHECKED, BUT IT'S NOT ABANDONED!
Wut? O.o
Proof.
Wait for migrants.
If everything is happening as the Master is telling us (no offense, dude)Wait for migrants.And hope the skelks and skoxes don't turn them into dwarf paste.
He's totally making this up.I really expect he doesn't.
He's totally making this up.I really expect he doesn't.
Because it'd be a hell of a record, seriously! 2 hours to completely wreck a fortress which has some serious "surviving" skills?
Just wow.
He did say he opened the rear surface doors. Combine that with the local wilddeath and a goblin siege, and you get one wrecked fortress.He's totally making this up.I really expect he doesn't.
Because it'd be a hell of a record, seriously! 2 hours to completely wreck a fortress which has some serious "surviving" skills?
Just wow.
Gentlemen, everyone, EVERYONE IS DEAD, but there's one problem, IT DIDN'T ABANDON! IT'S TRUE, THE SAVE IS CURSED!!! THERE'S NO ONE LEFT ALIVE, I CHECKED, BUT IT'S NOT ABANDONED!Seriously.
And we were making allusion to this:Gentlemen, everyone, EVERYONE IS DEAD, but there's one problem, IT DIDN'T ABANDON! IT'S TRUE, THE SAVE IS CURSED!!! THERE'S NO ONE LEFT ALIVE, I CHECKED, BUT IT'S NOT ABANDONED!Seriously.
Perhaps a goblin kidnapper is caught in a cage trap with a dwarf child? Or the bag with the child is still lying around somewhere?
And we were making allusion to this:Gentlemen, everyone, EVERYONE IS DEAD, but there's one problem, IT DIDN'T ABANDON! IT'S TRUE, THE SAVE IS CURSED!!! THERE'S NO ONE LEFT ALIVE, I CHECKED, BUT IT'S NOT ABANDONED!Seriously.
I would like to refer you to your signature. :P
This is Hellcannon, after all. Even though that it hasn't passed enough time to bend reality like in Failcannon.Time? You speak about time in this thread? We have so much time here, it's starting to wrinkle already. Also, we can always make more time. Or borrow some from earlier this thread.
And now, I realize that it has been a bad move to watch that "In time" film yesterday.This is Hellcannon, after all. Even though that it hasn't passed enough time to bend reality like in Failcannon.Time? You speak about time in this thread? We have so much time here, it's starting to wrinkle already. Also, we can always make more time. Or borrow some from earlier this thread.
Which yesterday are you speaking of?That yesterday X3
Fucking collages, how do they work. YOU'RE NOT EVEN REAL ART.
Oh, and it will make great for great meta-plot advancement.
Like I said...
---What.---It may not be the end of your turn. But SAVE. NOW. PLEASE.
Like I said...
-OMGWTFBBQ-
Like I said...
I always knew at some point we would create a fort that couldn't die. Didn't think we would create one so soon.
i'm guessing you'd have to do the EXACT same things I did, right down to the precise timing of actions, which is improbable. I think the universe just loving toying with us.
I think the exchange went as:
DF: Hey, man, your dwarves died, game's over!
Hellcannon: NOPE.
*Punchs DF in the face*
Helcannon: I FEEEL ALIVEEEEE!!
What kind of an abomination have we created, gentlemen?
I think the exchange went as:
DF: Hey, man, your dwarves died, game's over!
Hellcannon: NOPE.
*Punchs DF in the face*
Helcannon: I FEEEL ALIVEEEEE!!
What kind of an abomination have we created, gentlemen?
Mego, please put this in the OP.
Guys... Did we just win DF with this fort?No. We just didn't lose.
But we lost! Then we didn't! It's a win within a loss.Guys... Did we just win DF with this fort?No. We just didn't lose.
I think Mego killed himself when he saw the picture.
Like I said...Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Migrants. That's all there is to say.Time IS passing, and it seems to be ignoring the bleeding out reality slumped against the controls to the universe.
Hellcannon - the fortress that defined death itself.
FTFYHellcannon - the fortress that kicked death's backside.FTFY.
http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=34936.0%7C i'm going to cry in a corner...curse you nemesis unit...RAAHHHH!!!!!
http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=34936.0%7C i'm going to cry in a corner...curse you nemesis unit...RAAHHHH!!!!!
Just take the missing files from the last save.
There is only one thing we can do. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fi4K9Cus0_g&feature=related)Seppuku? xD
There is only one thing we can do. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fi4K9Cus0_g&feature=related)LET'S DO THE TIMEWARP AGAIN!!!!!
Why does this thread have so few screenshots?
I demand more.
Insanity is a lot more awesome if it comes with nice pictures.
I think the exchange went as:DF: Nemeis Unit Load Failed, I summon thee!
DF: Hey, man, your dwarves died, game's over!
Hellcannon: NOPE.
*Punchs DF in the face*
Helcannon: I FEEEL ALIVEEEEE!!
well, i'm not doing all of this again, so I guess we're savescumming.
There is only one thing we can do. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fi4K9Cus0_g&feature=related)
There is only one thing we can do. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fi4K9Cus0_g&feature=related)
I guess savescumming is the thing to do. Though this is perfect enough I'm almost tempted to say let it stand, and let this be the Battlefailed sequel that lasted less than a month before it failed to die, then was deleted by a glitch.
It was Hellcannon, bringing me into itself. I became part of the fortress, renewed with the energy to fight. I echoed my battle cry throughout the lands, as demons continued to pour in by the thousands:That's OP-quote stuff right there.
COME AT ME, BROS!
Nope. Just insane.(http://www.the-iss.com/The%20Master.png)
Aww... Now I can't kill it on it's thirteenth birthday... Or would it have to be fourteenth?I have no idea.
IM IN UR INTERNETyeah? I'm a smart person,
WATCHING U TYPE
IM IN UR INTERNETyeah? I'm a smart person,
WATCHING U TYPE
fetching the toad to stop your spamming.
IM IN UR INTERNETLook, it's getting smarter! It started with only Mmms. Now it's gathered some information from parts of the Internet and used it to formulate an average internet user expression (it just happens to have used the wrong parts of the Internet). I wonder what it's going to do next...
WATCHING U TYPE
Nice work, The Master, now you scared it away. Shame on you for opposing general weirdness.Actually, you just have to ask nicely. I was trying to get some general weirdness into this thread, but if you don't like it, I'll just stop.IM IN UR INTERNETyeah? I'm a smart person,
WATCHING U TYPE
fetching the toad to stop your spamming.
...you're very strange life forms, letting the troll baby grow up to be a big troll. You have to kill it before it kills you!The one time you finally manage to scare away a troll and it isn't even a real one.
Brilliant stuff so far, I especially like Strategia's Stuzang reprisal. Have you guys plotted out much of the backstory yet? I've been meaning to contribute, but I'm sort of developing a game and my time's been spent very painfully slowly learning sprites and chiptunes. Makes you realize why DF is ASCII.
Brilliant stuff so far, I especially like Strategia's Stuzang reprisal. Have you guys plotted out much of the backstory yet? I've been meaning to contribute, but I'm sort of developing a game and my time's been spent very painfully slowly learning sprites and chiptunes. Makes you realize why DF is ASCII.
Thank you :D I got the idea of a multiverse-devouring abomination after some people were talking about rifts in reality and such, then I re-read Battlefailed and Failcannon, realised the precedent had already been set, and decided to tie it all together, Battlefailed, Failcannon, Hellcannon and the metaplot.Spoiler: Meta-metaplot stuff, completely OOC and spoiler-y (click to show/hide)
Going good, so far nothing bad has happened, and a journal is out of the question because of this.
Going good, so far nothing bad has happened, and a journal is out of the question because of this.
Going good, so far nothing bad has happened, and a journal is out of the question because of this.
The Forgotten Beast Murphy has come! A huge skinless lizard. It has external ribs and it squirms and fidgets. It hunts those who taunt it. Beware its deadly law!
Going good, so far nothing bad has happened, and a journal is out of the question because of this.
The Forgotten Beast Murphy has come! A huge skinless lizard. It has external ribs and it squirms and fidgets. It hunts those who taunt it. Beware its deadly law!
I saw "Forgotten Beast" and flipped out. Fucking Swordthunders.
Question is, where is its soul?
It was too boring to post anything and you're embarassed about the last part of your turn running so smoothly, aren't you?
It was too boring to post anything and you're embarassed about the last part of your turn running so smoothly, aren't you?
Would certainly not be the first time.It was too boring to post anything and you're embarassed about the last part of your turn running so smoothly, aren't you?
A boring year where nothing happened in a Battlefailed fortress... Should we be surprised or scared?
Yes, I accounted for that. If all the people on the turn list were really going to play, I would probably get to play Battlefailed 5 in February 2013.
Yes, I accounted for that. If all the people on the turn list were really going to play, I would probably get to play Battlefailed 5 in February 2013.
Coming to a forum thread near you!
Yes, I accounted for that. If all the people on the turn list were really going to play, I would probably get to play Battlefailed 5 in February 2013.
Coming to a forum thread near you!
This fortress is not yet rated.
Side effects may include, but are not limited to:
Nausea, bleeding from the eyes, bleeding from the ears, bleeding from the nose, bleeding from the blood, internal hemorrhaging, external hemorrhaging, death, headache, stomachache, backache, spleenache, tendonitis, atrophied muscles, explosive discharge, diarrhea, necrosis of the skin, necrosis of the muscles, necrosis of the damned, zombie hordes, death, death-like symptoms, eldritch horrors from beyond time and space, vomiting, dry cough, fever, incontinence, dwarfism, vigilantism, mutant superpowers, death, amnesia, paranoia, claustrophobia, arachnophobia, schizophrenia, angina, hair loss, reduced sex drive, gambling addiction, alcoholism, death, reduced attention span, death, and mild swelling of the face.
Yes, I accounted for that. If all the people on the turn list were really going to play, I would probably get to play Battlefailed 5 in February 2013.
Coming to a forum thread near you!
This fortress is not yet rated.
Side effects may include, but are not limited to:
Nausea, bleeding from the eyes, bleeding from the ears, bleeding from the nose, bleeding from the blood, internal hemorrhaging, external hemorrhaging, death, headache, stomachache, backache, spleenache, tendonitis, atrophied muscles, explosive discharge, diarrhea, necrosis of the skin, necrosis of the muscles, necrosis of the damned, zombie hordes, death, death-like symptoms, eldritch horrors from beyond time and space, vomiting, dry cough, fever, incontinence, dwarfism, vigilantism, mutant superpowers, death, amnesia, paranoia, claustrophobia, arachnophobia, schizophrenia, angina, hair loss, reduced sex drive, gambling addiction, alcoholism, death, reduced attention span, death, and mild swelling of the face.
-quote removed to avoid a stupid pyramid-
You forgot identity theft and overly-complicated conspiracy
-quote removed to avoid a stupid pyramid-
You forgot identity theft and overly-complicated conspiracy
Body Surfing (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/BodySurf) Xanatos Speed Chessmaster (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/XanatosSpeedChess)?
-quote removed to avoid a stupid pyramid-
You forgot identity theft and overly-complicated conspiracy
Body Surfing (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/BodySurf) Xanatos Speed Chessmaster (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/XanatosSpeedChess)?
Overly Long Gag...
So far, out of seven turns, only four have actually been completed. Hellcannon started in early November, and it's now mid-December. At this rate, it'll be my turn by the end of January! I'll make it my birthday present to myself.
WHAT HAVE I INDIRECTLY PROVOKED?
So far, out of seven turns, only four have actually been completed. Hellcannon started in early November, and it's now mid-December. At this rate, it'll be my turn by the end of January! I'll make it my birthday present to myself.WHAT HAVE I INDIRECTLY PROVOKED?
You totally should have expected that.
I can ruin it again later if you wanted that.
apart from it raining on the tundra, a fucking obsidian pillar with smoking merchant remains, nothing much to report, the save will be up soon.
apart from it raining on the tundra, a fucking obsidian pillar with smoking merchant remains, nothing much to report, the save will be up soon.
That sounds so epic.
Summon the fortress artists!
He built a doomsday device. Nemesis is what happened when he screwed up.
but had lead plotful attack upon the fortress!No I didn't :V
When I said secrets I meant something only a person with a brain could find, BUT WHO NEEDS DEM IN ANYMORE, EH?!
No I didn't :V
So is the Fortress officially sentient, or was that retconned?
Make sense? MAKE SENSE?! Clearly you are insane. The fortress didn't become sentient; The inhabitants' will to survive drove them insane and they frantically clung to life until the gods told them to shut up and grow a beard.
He appears to have named all the dwarfs after him (except one),THE END OF TIME IS NIGH!
Uh. I looked at the save... Are you sure it's the correct year? It's too fucking small. There's only 13 'visited' z-levels and most of them consist of only a staircase with maybe a couple of adjoining rooms. I wanted the glory of Failcannon continued, to order megaprojects while watching hundreds of dwarves dying and not caring! Fountains of blood! Mountains of enemy corpses! Clashing madhouses! Solid golden FUCKs! Adamantine wasted on cats' collars! Babies murdered/ing their mothers! Demons tearing apart the fortress! Magma and fire! Undead horrors! Eternal sieges! Living legends! You know, the usual day at the Battlefailcannon. Not this mudhole. Also 80 FPS. Could I please get moved arooound 8 turns down the list? :)
You goddamn human! Any dwarf would look at this small fortress as an opportunity, not a disappointment.Nah, I could create the unholy nightmare described above, but I probably won't be able to finish it in one turn and definitely will miss out on the opportunity to revel in the completed aforementioned unholy nightmare. When having a choice between managing a 24-soul fortress where one death can mean the downfall and waiting a couple of turns for an unholy nightmare (heh, I like that. Unholy nightmare. Sounds nice), I'll wait. Especially considering that the next turn after that probably won't come before about May 2012.
You goddamn human! Any dwarf would look at this small fortress as an opportunity, not a disappointment.Nah, I could create the unholy nightmare described above, but I probably won't be able to finish it in one turn and definitely will miss out on the opportunity to revel in the completed aforementioned unholy nightmare. When having a choice between managing a 24-soul fortress where one death can mean the downfall and waiting a couple of turns for an unholy nightmare (heh, I like that. Unholy nightmare. Sounds nice), I'll wait. Especially considering that the next turn after that probably won't come before about May 2012.
Or Winrar. Winrar can open 7z, Rar, Zip, and a bunch others besides.
What in the eleven hells happened to this fortress?
Corpses every-fucking-where, a good chunk of the fortress flooding, more corpses, Masters everywhere, corpses outside, and a pillar of obsidian next to trader stuff and two pillars of ice. At least there are any corpses at this landmark. Seriously, dude, how did you manage to do it?
Now that I have seen it, I'll draw the random obsidian pillar and the ex-traders (they are no more [irony]I'M SO FUNNY[/irony])
No, I'm not a Doctor fan (It helps that it's only shown in paid TV), but I google'd it, so I understood it. I was more worried about the corpses. There are a bunch of "hot spots", but then thay are strewn around the most unimaginable of all places. Also, the obsidian spike. I don't want to know what rawsorcery was done, but I propose to leave the sipke there, as an unusually uninteresting landmark :DWhat in the eleven hells happened to this fortress?
Corpses every-fucking-where, a good chunk of the fortress flooding, more corpses, Masters everywhere, corpses outside, and a pillar of obsidian next to trader stuff and two pillars of ice. At least there are any corpses at this landmark. Seriously, dude, how did you manage to do it?
Now that I have seen it, I'll draw the random obsidian pillar and the ex-traders (they are no more [irony]I'M SO FUNNY[/irony])
Have you ever watched The End of Time, the Doctor Who episode?
Silly humans! I didn't use dfhack, I PRAYED TO ARMOK AND HE MADE IT RAIN!!!
Master, how could you even concieve of using dfliquids in a succession game? You're horrible! :'(
We have an obsidian penis in front of the fortress. No matter how The Master made it, it is still an obsidian penis. We're keeping it.
We have an obsidian penis in front of the fortress. No matter how The Master made it, it is still an obsidian penis. We're keeping it.
That quote belongs in a MUSEUM! Or at least the OP.
Added MesACrowd to the TvTropes page.
Silly humans! I didn't use dfhack, I PRAYED TO ARMOK AND HE MADE IT RAIN!!!
Disclaimer:
Not all prayers to armok, or armok related sacrificed, devices or miracles will translate into miracular rains of magma, obsidian or body parts, neither will it result in any guaranteed containable manner, all prayers should be used at the discretion of the discerning follower of armok, armok is not responsible for misuse of prayers, magma, or obsidian. Any irregularities in your magma based products are solely the responsibility of the worshiper and the quality of their sacrifice and/or prayers. Have a great day!
Silly humans! I didn't use dfhack, I PRAYED TO ARMOK AND HE MADE IT RAIN!!!
I'm surprised you never added anything for Swordthunders post-checkerboard, to be honest.The place has a page too?
I'm surprised you never added anything for Swordthunders post-checkerboard, to be honest.The place has a page too?
when the current Overlord gets around to un-Mastering everyone?Said Overseer should also make their custom profession "Overseer of Rassilon".
when the current Overlord gets around to un-Mastering everyone?Said Overseer should also make their custom profession "Overseer of Rassilon".
Zeratul goes berserk. I send Urist in to kill him. Zeratul murders Grov and Darvi in their sleep. Then he punches a sleeping Dariush, who promptly starts taking Zeratul apart with her pickaxe.
...
Could I please get moved arooound 8 turns down the list?
*cough-cough*...
Could I please get moved arooound 8 turns down the list?
*cough-cough*...
Could I please get moved arooound 8 turns down the list?
I'm still waiting for the okay from Mego.
I'm still waiting for the okay from Mego.
Huh, I seem to have gained the ability to summon dwarfers at will. Two-for-two so far, so.... SethCreiyd?
For future occasions such as this, if someone skips their turn, the next person in line should go ahead and start. I'll update the turn list whenever I get the chance. Don't feel as if you have to wait on me to say you can take your turn.But I'm a lazy fuck and like postponing shit.
Just wait until you find out my profession. I think I might've foreshadowed it.
I also used some Runemagic to alter the traits of some people. Like, Eric now has decent Agility, and Reudh's dwarf has become antisocial. (Andreus got one with over 1800 Willpower, which I thought fitting for somebody who refuses to stay. Fucking. Dead. No hacking was involved there though, as luck would have it).
So I redwarfed everybody who wasn't struck out on the redwarfing lists (plus myself, of course).When you get a chance, what is Zeratul's gender and actual profession?
Note that I added one to the respective numbers of those people on the perpetual redwarfing lists (e.g. Mego is now Mego IV).
That means, yes, there were exactly as many dwarves let to do that, so there are no Masters running about (at least none that I know of).
You weren't redwarfed, so you'd still be GZGN III if you were still alive.
Was I dorfed yet, if so, personality please? If not, please just throw someone in the military with a hammer when you can.
Was I dorfed yet, if so, personality please? If not, please just throw someone in the military with a hammer when you can.
*hammers stormtemplar into the military*
Was I dorfed yet, if so, personality please? If not, please just throw someone in the military with a hammer when you can.
*hammers stormtemplar into the military*
For some reason that made me picture the new dwarf recruit reporting for duty in the barracks with a warhammer lodged in his helmet/head
Was I dorfed yet, if so, personality please? If not, please just throw someone in the military with a hammer when you can.
Was I dorfed yet, if so, personality please? If not, please just throw someone in the military with a hammer when you can.
*hammers stormtemplar into the military*
For some reason that made me picture the new dwarf recruit reporting for duty in the barracks with a warhammer lodged in his helmet/head
That is completely accurate.
FORTRESS ARTISTS!
Has That Aussie Dwarf taken a new disguise yet?Probably not.
Out of curiousity...
Do I, er... exist?
Negative.
Though that might change now that we got some unnamed dorfs.
Negative.
Though that might change now that we got some unnamed dorfs.
Cool. Void travels for me, then. Please let me know when I've been redwarfed.
Negative.
Though that might change now that we got some unnamed dorfs.
Cool. Void travels for me, then. Please let me know when I've been redwarfed.
When I get redwarfed, could you mention a migrant going missing and then turning up looking only somewhat similar to how they used to appear?
Negative.
Though that might change now that we got some unnamed dorfs.
Cool. Void travels for me, then. Please let me know when I've been redwarfed.
When I get redwarfed, could you mention a migrant going missing and then turning up looking only somewhat similar to how they used to appear?
I read this and imagined a dwarf holding a wire with a sock stuck on the end pulling it from the end of a passage and saying stuff like, "Yeah, come on ya little bugger... that's a good boy... closer... a bit closer... G'night mate!" *whud*
Negative.
Though that might change now that we got some unnamed dorfs.
Cool. Void travels for me, then. Please let me know when I've been redwarfed.
When I get redwarfed, could you mention a migrant going missing and then turning up looking only somewhat similar to how they used to appear?
I read this and imagined a dwarf holding a wire with a sock stuck on the end pulling it from the end of a passage and saying stuff like, "Yeah, come on ya little bugger... that's a good boy... closer... a bit closer... G'night mate!" *whud*
That's pretty much what I thought of as well.
Negative.
Though that might change now that we got some unnamed dorfs.
Cool. Void travels for me, then. Please let me know when I've been redwarfed.
When I get redwarfed, could you mention a migrant going missing and then turning up looking only somewhat similar to how they used to appear?
I read this and imagined a dwarf holding a wire with a sock stuck on the end pulling it from the end of a passage and saying stuff like, "Yeah, come on ya little bugger... that's a good boy... closer... a bit closer... G'night mate!" *whud*
Was I dorfed yet, if so, personality please? If not, please just throw someone in the military with a hammer when you can.
*hammers stormtemplar into the military*
For some reason that made me picture the new dwarf recruit reporting for duty in the barracks with a warhammer lodged in his helmet/head
That is completely accurate.
FORTRESS ARTISTS!
Kisame12794 has claimed a Sketchbook!
I NEED PENCILS! I NEED ERASERS!
Negative.
Though that might change now that we got some unnamed dorfs.
Cool. Void travels for me, then. Please let me know when I've been redwarfed.
When I get redwarfed, could you mention a migrant going missing and then turning up looking only somewhat similar to how they used to appear?
I read this and imagined a dwarf holding a wire with a sock stuck on the end pulling it from the end of a passage and saying stuff like, "Yeah, come on ya little bugger... that's a good boy... closer... a bit closer... G'night mate!" *whud*
(http://img.ie/23b03.png)
anything close to what your minds painted?
That's brilliant. Except it's only one dwarf, not two. That Aussie Dwarf works alone...
YOU MISSED A "!
This?Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Now we just need this.
The Aussie drawing has been added to the OP, and the quotes have been encased in a spoiler tag so they don't take up so much room.
I read this and imagined a dwarf holding a wire with a sock stuck on the end pulling it from the end of a passage and saying stuff like, "Yeah, come on ya little bugger... that's a good boy... closer... a bit closer... G'night mate!" *whud*
I leave the forums for a month and you guys demolish Failcannon.
I leave the forums for a month and you guys demolish Failcannon.
I leave the forums for a month and you guys demolish Failcannon.
It wasn't so much an accident as a definite outcome.
WHHHHYYYYYYYY. I have finished the picture, now I just need to scan it and upload it.Still like to see it :P might be even
For a minute I was staring at "Shashmebzuth" and trying to figure out if that was Hellcannon or Swordthunders. This is why we can't have nice things; someone goes and translates them into a language we can't be arsed to learn.
My previous post should be enough to tell you what's going on.
For a minute I was staring at "Shashmebzuth" and trying to figure out if that was Hellcannon or Swordthunders. This is why we can't have nice things; someone goes and translates them into a language we can't be arsed to learn.
Nokzamungeg -> Ungegugath -> Shashmebzuth. Sword is Dastot; Nokzamungeg and Ungegugath's civ was called Dastot Cog, The Sword of Boots. Swordthunders would be Dastotamud. (I had to look up Thunder here (http://daisyct.org/daniel/EnglishDwarfDictionary.html), amazing little tool. I've got the other ones memorised from spending so much time reading the threads.)edit: Please hold while repairs are being performedThank you for your time
Also, it would be Ungegmebzuth for Failcannon. Oar was changed to cannon for the name. And so, Led Shakeoars became Led Shakecannons.
Well, in the original Aluonra save it was belch that became cannon, so it's probably something else.
On other news: I am putting down all updates from all three forts in a .txt file for no reason other than a complete lack of anything intresting to do. Already done with the Battlefailed ones.
Well, in the original Aluonra save it was belch that became cannon, so it's probably something else.
On other news: I am putting down all updates from all three forts in a .txt file for no reason other than a complete lack of anything intresting to do. Already done with the Battlefailed ones.
I was thinking about doing this for archival purposes. Mind shooting me the Battlefailed updates?
Even better, add the in-between-update posts at the bottom of each update, SA-style.
For a minute I was staring at "Shashmebzuth" and trying to figure out if that was Hellcannon or Swordthunders. This is why we can't have nice things; someone goes and translates them into a language we can't be arsed to learn.
I'll send it to you after I finish my current archiving spree.
... I guess I should be the fort's bookkeeper or something.
Into my sig with ya, little bragging rights.I'll send it to you after I finish my current archiving spree.
... I guess I should be the fort's bookkeeper or something.
You're hired.
They are dead. They are all dead. The surface is actually completely free from anything that could hurt us. I didn't actually expect it but, things have actually turned for the better. Everybody's currently outside picking up stuff, as long as the coast is clear.
Maybe I was too pessimistic. I don't know. I hope that this stays that way for as long as possible.
The Master - N/A - Eternal Magnificent Bastard - On this list because Mego said soSo true.
And a few from the Battlefailed TV Tropes PageQuoteBizarrchitecture: By the Dwarves dumb enormous ghost.
Body Surf: The Stars later to the Boatmurdered the sequel and events.
None of tunnels, shafts and into a tomb, proved to do this crazy magnetic masteriffic.
Mad Scient Morality License: Deconstant fly known after won
The last survive outside the hooves of the fortress one ever, being beat the princess in several was to grab a crossbow another dwarves ended, Battlefailed...
— Andreus can communicate Meta Plot.
Hellcannon. Rigged up to the Battlefailed Failcannon, only going down after wiping out more than his share of kobolds. Note that this was a terrible idea."
— Seth Creiyd
"I have no idea where anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the unholy abommination that bought time and safety for the other succession fortress for three entire fortress. Now, Hellcannon itself becomes this after the device above. It's doomsday mechanism 'Faillever was pulled to unleash an army of Eldritch Abominations to enter, Failcannon, Battlefailed.
Strategia's notes on a brief scuffle with something to another dwarf was being taken over by Andreus' ghost. The joke stuck,
This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen
This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen
That's gold.
This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen
That's gold.
No, it's Dwarven Beat Poetry.
Current dwarfing list:
Journal of Mego, Chaos Crafter
What the hell, CP? I just got done yelling at Gizogin for doodling on the transdimensional veils, and now you're purposefully trying to rip them? Go take a hard look through the veil in the dining hall. You'll see what happened last time.
Journal of Mego, Chaos Crafter
What the hell, CP? I just got done yelling at Gizogin for doodling on the transdimensional veils, and now you're purposefully trying to rip them? Go take a hard look through the veil in the dining hall. You'll see what happened last time.
Journal of Mego, Chaos Crafter
What the hell, CP? I just got done yelling at Gizogin for doodling on the transdimensional veils, and now you're purposefully trying to rip them? Go take a hard look through the veil in the dining hall. You'll see what happened last time.
Nonono, this is totally different, I swear! I'm going AROUND it. No ripping at all.
It's... natural. Yeah. Homeopathic or some shit. Homeopathic dimensional tampering.
I don't think the integrity of the fabric of space-time matters anymore, really. One might be more concered with building a super-weapon of sorts to defeat the evil, whatever it is. A dwarfy one, of course.
I don't think the integrity of the fabric of space-time matters anymore, really. One might be more concered with building a super-weapon of sorts to defeat the evil, whatever it is. A dwarfy one, of course.
This will be done on my turn, if not sooner.
I don't think the integrity of the fabric of space-time matters anymore, really. One might be more concered with building a super-weapon of sorts to defeat the evil, whatever it is. A dwarfy one, of course.
This will be done on my turn, if not sooner.
Is that a threat?
You don't need to be the master of a kobold cave to know that you can't hemeopathically write on the dimensional dermi. Pretty soon you'll have Paklaras pouring in looking to invade your nest boxes and turn all your wood into crappy shields and breastplates to conquer the world. Or worse, invaded by armies of cats. Or open up a portal to some star somewhere and destroy the entire world in one go.
Actually, don't mess with the skin of the dimensions at all. Write your journals in microscript on the backs of slabs of stone or something. You're a ghost, you can go anywhere and see items of any scale, and you've got enough energy to make extremely fine cuts in weak stone somewhere dwarves won't see, and then will not understand they're looking at an artificial construct with the naked eye. Or, possess dwarves and write normal journals. It's not hard, I figured it out years ago! And it won't rain in the tundra so you won't have to deal with Entropic Energy Erosion of Non-Material Entities Through Liquid Water.
Report on the Battlefailed/Failcannon Archive thing. I'm at Eric's turn (turn 23 of 24) so it shouldn't be long. A warning to anyone who might want it: it's already 764 pages long and contain 126.797 words, and I'm not done yet.
Someone should make a novel or something out of it, however.
Updates, Darvi? Don't make me accidentally the hellcannon.First I'll have to update me other fort. Can take a while because I suck at drawing.
*threatens Darvi with large inflatable mallet*
-The Doctor claiming the mechanics workshop
-Told the dwarves to make crutches, splints and buckets, but rather than managing work orders Mego made himself dinner.
I think the mayor position is actually replaceable. At least I can, and don't remember ever editing the mayor's raw entry. Try it. Or lock my dorf away and make sure someone else has no labors enabled and spends all his/her life partying and making friends until I'm voted out!
IT doesnt matter if you have a mayor or a duke, the fort will still descend into chaos and will still end with a screaming dwarf holding up the head of the last sane dwarf on a pile of dead babies in the middle of a magma chamber while FBs rage outside.
It could also end with a mayor that repeatedly mandates things to remind you about our shortage of X, where X is something that overseers routinely forget to make which are still pretty nice, like dining tables. My mayor mandates shields. I always forget to manufacture more masterwork copper shields to clobber goblins with! What are my dorf's preferences anyway?He likes native copper, bismuth, onyx, highwood wood, crystal glass, giant eagle leather, crossbows, hatch covers, scepters, catapult parts and deer for their grace.
He likes deer for their grace.
Fun fact: most of the dorfs spend their time on the surface anyway. I guess that elven caravan had quite a few socks with them.It could also end with a mayor that repeatedly mandates things to remind you about our shortage of X, where X is something that overseers routinely forget to make which are still pretty nice, like dining tables. My mayor mandates shields. I always forget to manufacture more masterwork copper shields to clobber goblins with! What are my dorf's preferences anyway?He likes native copper, bismuth, onyx, highwood wood, crystal glass, giant eagle leather, crossbows, hatch covers, scepters, catapult parts and deer for their grace.
He's an elf? KILLL!!!
Darn you ninjas.
Ah but I am neither a dwarf nor an elf.
I am a horrible monstrosity, given form by Armok to destroy both kindreds if they insult the Blood God.
He likes native copper, bismuth, onyx, highwood wood, crystal glass, giant eagle leather, crossbows, hatch covers, scepters, catapult parts and deer for their grace.
ELF
Not even on the dorfing list.That's because, at some point in the future, Eric Blank killed him so hard that he was never even on the dorfing list to begin with.
Deviled cancels view pref screen: searching infant.Searching infant? What is this, airport security?
You know... Evil biomes in the new version seem like they're going to be a whole lot more terrifying... Namely the clouds of evil gases roaming the map. The disease-ridden rain could be a right terror as well if it causes drowsiness or sends dwarves to the hospital on a regular basis.
Battlefailed IV will certainly be full of !!FUN!! and built out of the skeletal remains of the deceased!
You know... Evil biomes in the new version seem like they're going to be a whole lot more terrifying... Namely the clouds of evil gases roaming the map. The disease-ridden rain could be a right terror as well if it causes drowsiness or sends dwarves to the hospital on a regular basis.
Battlefailed IV will certainly be full of !!FUN!! and built out of the skeletal remains of the deceased!
If we do get !!FUN!! rain, I'm going to collect it in a reservoir and pump it back out over the surface as a weapon.
Has That Aussie Dwarf been redorfed yet? I don't recall seeing a mention of itProbably not.
Guys, the dorfing list is still accurate. Go read that instead of continually pestering me.But that's substantially less work for all persons involved! What manner of elf are you, to suggest such a thing?
I am neither dwarf, elf, or man.
I am also lazy enough to let you guys do all the work.
And They Were Never Heard From Again... (http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=6fBRaq7rXNc#t=41s)I am neither dwarf or man.
I am also lazy enough to let you guys do all the work.
You mean you're an elf like me?
(Assuming he's still alive)
Guys, the dorfing list is still accurate.One would assume that people would learn, but since you guys are dorfs that was kinda stupid of me.
(Assuming he's still alive)Guys, the dorfing list is still accurate.One would assume that people would learn, but since you guys are dorfs that was kinda stupid of me.
(http://i1190.photobucket.com/albums/z442/WymarSane/rridgway.png)
You never showed my pref screen.
Or maybe they'll find YOU.It is my headcanon that this child is the previous incarnation of Remalle who died in an earlier update.
Goblin snatchers?
People will be added to the turn and dorfing lists once I get sleep.
If Aussie chloroforms me, I swear there will be strawberries.
(Darvi, I dare you to replace Mego's Dwarf with a That Aussie Dwarf with the profession Mego Doppleganger)
(Darvi, I dare you to replace Mego's Dwarf with a That Aussie Dwarf with the profession Mego Doppleganger)
That Aussie Mego - Mego Doppelgänger?
And a forbidden, "empty" coffin, hidden in a small niche behind a fake wall.
(Darvi, I dare you to replace Mego's Dwarf with a That Aussie Dwarf with the profession Mego Doppleganger)
That Aussie Mego - Mego Doppelgänger?
And a forbidden, "empty" coffin, hidden in a small niche behind a fake wall.
Surrounded by strawberries.
More Swordthunders references. It's like Hellcannon and Swordthunders are cosmically intertwined...
More Swordthunders references. It's like Hellcannon and Swordthunders are cosmically intertwined...
Please don't make me read a whole other fort to understand what's going on. I have enough trouble keeping up to date on this one.
More Swordthunders references. It's like Hellcannon and Swordthunders are cosmically intertwined...
Please don't make me read a whole other fort to understand what's going on. I have enough trouble keeping up to date on this one.
But you had to read 2 other forts to be able to keep up with this one already!
Sigh... very well.
I can't imagine why you would want to join in on something as crazy as thiswithout knowing the insanity that came before it.
TAD stop dying.
Darvi - N/A - Rassilon - High analytical ability, low memory and focus, negligible empathy
Go watch the Doctor Who 2009 Christmas Special before I pummel you with my rotting corpse.
Ieb, you're up. I don't really think I need to PM you, seeing as how you're constantly stalking this thread.
Hey, I should be on that continuous redorfing list!Who are you? I'm sure I haven't seen you around.
I've had dwarves sleep while in an active danger room.
- Give up, be stricken by melancholy and post the save of a year spent doing fuck-all right after I slit my wrists and submit the post and files with my last breath.
Quote from: Ieb- Give up, be stricken by melancholy and post the save of a year spent doing fuck-all right after I slit my wrists and submit the post and files with my last breath.WOAH! Woah, hold on there man... post the save and update, THEN kill yourself. Otherwise you might pass out from bloodloss before you manage to do the writeup and upload the save.
7th of Granite:
Dear diary. The military dispatched Kul today. Gizogin lost her whole right hand though. Looks painful. They refuse to stay in the hospital though. Admirable, although she's supposed to be our Chief Medical Dwarf. Does she really know what she's doing? Mosus was the one to kill Kul. She's so cool.
I recall you're an adept swordman who has been ordered to wield an artifact spore tree bow.He does frequently run out of ammo while hunting.
I'm not sure if we have any arrows.
Mood: Ecstatic to the nth degree.I felt exactly the same way the other day.
The master had a happiness score of over 1000.Mood: Ecstatic to the nth degree.I felt exactly the same way the other day.
Dear diary. Today I took control as the military commander of HellCannon. We didn't have one, and I had to have SOME title, you know?
"He also hated toads."The master had a happiness score of over 1000.Mood: Ecstatic to the nth degree.I felt exactly the same way the other day.
It's like he broke the Border of Extasy or something.
He also hated toads. Fitting considering what kind of a dick the Master is.
Urist Imiknorris had that position.
We need a doomsday device.Gizogin has it.
(Adept Swordsdwarf? Lost my right hand? Am I Jaime Lannister now?)
Oh uhh, two things. Darvi: Berserk dorfs overcome any obstacle in order to murder others. They just crawled over to the sleeping speardorf and bashed their head in.Oh. Right.
And uhhh Gizogin, I did my usual mistake of stating that "they lost their right hand" when I meant "they lost their right arm".Not much of a hindrance. Heheh.
I just realized. How could Thor do any harm if he was hospitalised?(Adept Swordsdwarf? Lost my right hand? Am I Jaime Lannister now?)Are you a blonde? I didn't check.No wait that's Tyrion.
Oh uhh, two things. Darvi: Berserk dorfs overcome any obstacle in order to murder others. They just crawled over to the sleeping speardorf and bashed their head in.
And uhhh Gizogin, I did my usual mistake of stating that "they lost their right hand" when I meant "they lost their right arm".
Sorry about that. What with you already having made a journal post and all that.
It's good to see a good, old-fashioned update again.
Also, Ieb,Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I hate to ask, but it's a really long time. Any ETA on my dorfing? As I said, just putting someone into the military with a hammer assigned to them would be fine.Your dorf's been and gone.
Also on that savescum part, a shrimp of fire attacked and it was slaughtered by our soldiers.You can worship me later for building up a decent military.
Also on that savescum part, a shrimp of fire attacked and it was slaughtered by our soldiers.You can worship me later for building up a decent military.
Also on that savescum part, a shrimp of fire attacked and it was slaughtered by our soldiers.You can worship me later for building up a decent military.
Yay for military dictatorships.
He uses his beard.
Duh.
(Nevermind that my current incarnation is female.Your point being?
(Nevermind that my current incarnation is female.Your point being?
You know exactly that dwarven beards don't discriminate.
[FEMALE]
[MULTIPLE_LITTER_RARE]
To add beards, put square brackets around the following:
BODY_DETAIL_PLAN:FACIAL_HAIR_TISSUE_LAYERSDiary of the spirit of stormtemplar
This fort is insane! I was dead by the time I realized I was alive! This place is a far cry from my old mighty home in horsemurdered. Shame its universe became unstable. Now I've possessed a new body and I must use my hammer to bring order to this fort, and to the cosmos around it. People DOODLING on the walls of space and time! UNACCEPTABLE! It's a shame it will take me time to regain my legendary hammer skills in this new body. Why the hell the gods made the world that way, I dunno.
After the Event Horizon of Failcannon, this hardly surprises me.
We should keep track of our headcanon somewhere.
Headcanon?Fund it!
Headcannon.
That should be the name for Battlefailed 4.
So what I'll do, is fix it up, make it have some form and purpose, and then destroy it so completely that there's no hope of salvage!
It wasn't broken either.
Just in poor shape.
So what I'll do, is fix it up, make it have some form and purpose, and then destroy it so completely that there's no hope of salvage!
I am not on the dorfing list! This is unacceptable!
Dorfing request as per forms: Deathsword - Bookkeeper if there is none, otherwise a Swordsdwarf (or both) - Obstructive Bureaucrat - If there are any non-sociable dorfs avaiable, dorf me as that, if not I don't care which one.
Ahem. The dorfing list in the main page seems incomplete.It has, in fact, not been updated since last year despite me pointing it out twice.
20th of Malachite:
Dear diary. Today, Conchobar III finally walked out of the hospital. Turns out that whoever put him up in traction last year forgot to remove him. Everyone has been diligent to take care of him though, so he hasn't complained too much. I worry once again about the medical work quality here. Conchobar checked in for a smashed finger- and toenails, you know? Well that and a missing ear. And some broken toes.
Mood: Puzzled.
with no medical trainingThat's technically untrue.
Ahem. The dorfing list in the main page seems incomplete.
Oh? Did I somehow gain medical experience without my knowledge?with no medical trainingThat's technically untrue.
Yeah, I should be on it to.Reading comprehension fail.
I think you started out with it. Migrants and all that shit.Oh? Did I somehow gain medical experience without my knowledge?with no medical trainingThat's technically untrue.
Yeah, I should be on it too.Reading comprehension fail.
Seems fine to me. I certainly didn't just fix that typo.....
I am not on the dorfing list! This is unacceptable!
Dorfing request as per forms: Deathsword - Bookkeeper if there is none, otherwise a Swordsdwarf (or both) - Obstructive Bureaucrat - If there are any non-sociable dorfs avaiable, dorf me as that, if not I don't care which one.
Ahem. The dorfing list in the main page seems incomplete.
Turn list
11. Mego
I thought I saw you on Darvi's last list, so I didn't bother adding you myself. That has been fixed.I don't see any changes.
At the very least copypasting my last list would'nt've taken too much time.
And you're not eve alive how are you supposed to do any masterminding?
Ephitemiius is dead, AC got dwarfed, and I know it's you TAD.
Hmm... I'd like to be dwarfed, if you don't mind. Male, militarydwarf if possible.
After that 0 population bit, who knows what'll happen in this fort [and likely Battlefailed 4, when it comes up]....
Mego has cancelled Write In Journal: Gone CrazyMego cancels Going Crazy: Redundancy Apparent.
For kicks and giggles, I could stream the battle on my justin.tv stream. Anyone interested?
Also, do the doors require manual unlocking?
Meeting Log, 1 Granite 209
Upon joining the meeting, TAD and CatalystParadox were confused as to why there were only two attendees. At that point, I realized I lack a body, and that TAD was occupying my former body. Fuck you.
I am overseer. What I say is canon. TAD bodysnatched me.I was also overseer. What I said is also canon.
"Mego IV? - Aussie Dwarf"
So, let me get this straight: Mego and TAD have become a single entity?
The horror...
This. The fact that Mego's body is still around means something, yanno.So, let me get this straight: Mego and TAD have become a single entity?
The horror...
Oh, no no. My dwarf just clubbed Mego's over the head with whatever was handy, dumped the body out in the snow, and broken out his Junior Dwarf Disguise Kit so that he now looks like Mego. They'll never know the difference and all according to plan...
My dwarf isn't mystical, he's the one mundane dwarf in the fortress. While you're all in the outer realms possessing random dwarves, mine's just... disposing of them and using bits from his disguise kit (with real horse-hair beard extensions and three different beard-dyes!) to wander around the fortress looking like them.
I had a dream about Hellcannon last night. I went online to check it, and it was on page 100, and also my turn. I was really excited to play, but when I opened it, my computer exploded. I'm not sure what it meant.
So, funny story. I opened up Dwarf Fortress to play more of my turn today. (funny inorite?) Well, I was quite confused when there were no fortresses named "Shashmebzuth" on the Continue Playing menu. I started freaking out, until I realized I had been playing the turn on the Linux side of my computer. I'm on Windows now. Linux can do read/write operations on NTFS filesystems, but Windows can't even detect the existence of ext4 filesystems. That means, I have to reboot into Linux, copy the save into my Windows DF folder, and then go back to Windows.
FORTRESS PROGRAMMERS! I NEED AN EXT4 READER FOR WINDOWS!
So, funny story. I opened up Dwarf Fortress to play more of my turn today. (funny inorite?) Well, I was quite confused when there were no fortresses named "Shashmebzuth" on the Continue Playing menu. I started freaking out, until I realized I had been playing the turn on the Linux side of my computer. I'm on Windows now. Linux can do read/write operations on NTFS filesystems, but Windows can't even detect the existence of ext4 filesystems. That means, I have to reboot into Linux, copy the save into my Windows DF folder, and then go back to Windows.
FORTRESS PROGRAMMERS! I NEED AN EXT4 READER FOR WINDOWS!
Better solution: Just keep the save in the Windows DF version, then do a symlink of the save folder in the NTFS partition into your Linux DF folder. Then you just have one save folder between the two versions and problem solved.
So, funny story. I opened up Dwarf Fortress to play more of my turn today. (funny inorite?) Well, I was quite confused when there were no fortresses named "Shashmebzuth" on the Continue Playing menu. I started freaking out, until I realized I had been playing the turn on the Linux side of my computer. I'm on Windows now. Linux can do read/write operations on NTFS filesystems, but Windows can't even detect the existence of ext4 filesystems. That means, I have to reboot into Linux, copy the save into my Windows DF folder, and then go back to Windows.
FORTRESS PROGRAMMERS! I NEED AN EXT4 READER FOR WINDOWS!
Better solution: Just keep the save in the Windows DF version, then do a symlink of the save folder in the NTFS partition into your Linux DF folder. Then you just have one save folder between the two versions and problem solved.
Translation: Blah blah technobabble (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TechnoBabble) blah science wizardry jargon blah blah strange words.
So what's the problem with Grath's solution?
Non-Technobabble Translation: Windows and Linux store files using different methods. Linux has a way to understand how Windows stores files, but nobody has yet made a way for Windows to understand how Linux stores files. Therefore, to be able to easily play Dwarf Fortress in either Windows or Linux, store the save files in the DF folder in Windows, and then tell Linux to pretend that the save files folder in the Windows DF folder is also in the DF folder in Linux.
The problem is, I started playing on Linux...Grath's solution means you have to start with Windows. Mego started with Linux, and we don't have a tool to turn the Linux file and make it usable with Windows.
Most unfortunately. No dwarves already inside the fortress have died. Yet. The migrants had no chance.
Also, for major plot stuff, you guys should all watch at least one of the last two updates. Watch carefully. Gizogin already noticed the major plot item. Can you?
If CatalystParadox fused with us, even the demons in Hell would fear ourmightlunacy.
If CatalystParadox fused with us, even the demons in Hell would fear ourmightlunacy.
I assure you that my silence of late is to be taken as ominous.
New overseer, less than ten turns before me... Think I'll take a chance at a redwarfing.Did this get missed? Or did I just get dwarfed and then immediately killed?
Vegdrasil - Something very dwarf-like - Dark Templar - Let me know what my profession is before the dwarfing, please.
A function Hellcannon would be a one-shot weapon, Mego. You'd need an isolated passage down from the surface to one of the adamantine spires, right down to the fatal digging point (Or suspend a block over it controlled by a lever). Pop the seal and out fly the demons to attack things on the surface. Preferably with the fortress sealed tight.
A function Hellcannon would be a one-shot weapon, Mego. You'd need an isolated passage down from the surface to one of the adamantine spires, right down to the fatal digging point (Or suspend a block over it controlled by a lever). Pop the seal and out fly the demons to attack things on the surface. Preferably with the fortress sealed tight.
....Unless you separated the demons into little clumps somehow. Then you might get....4-10 shots. Maybe more....depends how many demons you get and how well they could be split up....maybe use cave-ins to seal them into small rooms, and sacrifice a dwarf with each shot to let them into the "barrel"?
You could wall off hell like Aussie did, then create a designated area where demons can spawn and use a trail of chained cats (or nobles) to lead the demons to the barrel chamber, which is superpressurized with water and used to launch the horrors of the underworld at elves.
They'll eventually leave the map similar to animals, right?
I imagine they'd need masses of bait for it to work, be it dwarves, elves, whatever.
I imagine they'd need masses of bait for it to work, be it dwarves, elves, whatever.
Then the plan has no downsides, yes?
I'm certain this plan has a number of fatal flaws
Now, hang on a minute. My turn is coming up, and I'm not sure I want to have to wait for Battlefailed IV (This Time, it's Personal) to be able to take it. On the other hand, with the next release seemingly right around the corner, it might be fun to be the one to start the new fortress in DF2012...
Hellcannon News: End of Spring
18th Felsite
It seems that ThatAussieDwarf left out two important layers of his blueprints. We are examining the site of the trap today to determine if the necessary changes can be made. If not, I will have him hanged.
Hellcannon News: End of Spring
18th Felsite
It seems that ThatAussieDwarf left out two important layers of his blueprints. We are examining the site of the trap today to determine if the necessary changes can be made. If not, I will have him hanged.
Blupri- YOU'RE BUILDING A CHECKERBOARD!
Looks like you missed the text-only bit about me saying to leave two levels between the board surface and the storage tanks so the liquids can flow freely, huh?.
The final solution of Hellcannon:
We colonise hell.
We live in hell.
Demons are wiped out. We have a sealed fort from the new demons that wander in on the map edge.
Then, something 'happens' (someone breaks a wall, or something goes horribly wrong) and the demons fly through Hellcannon Proper and obliterate everything within.
According to the proposed plans, Hell must be sealed off from the fort in an area of identical proportion to that of our defensive perimeter around the surface. (ie: walling everything off up to the map edge.) As the Head Stoneworker and the one directly in charge of the workers, I am displeased by the so-far total lack of security measures and basic protection of our masons who will be responsible for the construction of these walls in these plans. After all, if they're dieing en-route to the construction zone, then they clearly aren't going to be constructing anything.
I propose that enclosed tunnels should be constructed over the floor of hell to at least get workers to the edges safely, and these tunnels be patrolled by highly trained and extremely well-equipped warriors. If it turns out the way that old legend of Swordthunders or whatever did, Hellcannon wouldn't have the staff or leadership to survive such a rate of attrition, and the project simply could not be completed.
It'd be dangerous though.
Hellcannon and Swordthunders are deeply linked. Expect Weird Time Shit (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TimeyWimeyBall) to go down.
I hope there's not too much Weird Time Shit.I agree. Also, I'm not sure if this has been said before, but updates should be mandatory. It's very confusing when we go 1-2 turns without any sort of news (excluding dwarfing) from a player.
I've once again sort of lost track what the fuck is supposed to happen, with body sliders and hell colonization and so on.
This whole story is like a rotten fruit that I keep trying to grasp to sate myself, and it keeps slipping away through my bony fingers in a mushy mess that I can't make anything out of.
Oh gawd, Ieb, now I'm worried. :S
Provided we have a population of 10 stone workers in a fort of 100 with 20-30 military, this could work.
Oh gawd, Ieb, now I'm worried. :S
You should be more concerned about Mego building a complex engineering project involving both magma AND water that he got wrong once already.
I hope there's not too much Weird Time Shit.
I've once again sort of lost track what the fuck is supposed to happen, with body sliders and hell colonization and so on.
This whole story is like a rotten fruit that I keep trying to grasp to sate myself, and it keeps slipping away through my bony fingers in a mushy mess that I can't make anything out of.
Oh gawd, Ieb, now I'm worried. :S
You should be more concerned about Mego building a complex engineering project involving both magma AND water that he got wrong once already.
That was Failcannon Prime right?
I'm still bummed that it turned out in the awesome reclaim thread that Failcannon Prime wouldn't have worked even if it had gotten finished.
Also nothing can possibly go wrong. I'm using Aussie's blueprints. That I spilled coffee on.
It seems that ThatAussieDwarf left out two important layers of his blueprints. We are examining the site of the trap today to determine if the necessary changes can be made. If not, I will have him hanged.
Ah, the dangers of being a megaproject pioneer.
Blueprints that have been stained brown, however...Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Blueprints that have been stained brown, however...Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Red, Clear 'n Brown!
It's the Hellcannon Flag!
The fortress flag should be a sock stained with FB ichor, booze, blood and vomit hoisted in an osidian pole
We'd would need to expose it to all those stuff
We'd would need to expose it to all those stuff
That... shouldn't be a problem...
So... Everyone died then, didn't they?Nah. If everyone died, Mego would have said something. In fact, the only thing we can be sure of is that everyone hasn't died.
So... Everyone died then, didn't they?
@Vgray: I don't believe we have any masons left, but on the list you go.
In other news, the flash drive that had my notes on it has disappeared. Fuuuuuuuck. I have a save from where I left off last time, so if the flash drive doesn't show up, I can redo that part of the turn.
The checkerboard is going exactly as expected. By that, I mean it is a wreck, because Gizogin had to go and spill some booze on the blueprints. Now they're brownprints.
@Vgray: I don't believe we have any masons left, but on the list you go.
In other news, the flash drive that had my notes on it has disappeared. Fuuuuuuuck. I have a save from where I left off last time, so if the flash drive doesn't show up, I can redo that part of the turn.
The checkerboard is going exactly as expected. By that, I mean it is a wreck, because Gizogin had to go and spill some booze on the blueprints. Now they're brownprints.
@Vgray: I don't believe we have any masons left, but on the list you go.
In other news, the flash drive that had my notes on it has disappeared. Fuuuuuuuck. I have a save from where I left off last time, so if the flash drive doesn't show up, I can redo that part of the turn.
The checkerboard is going exactly as expected. By that, I mean it is a wreck, because Gizogin had to go and spill some booze on the blueprints. Now they're brownprints.
Wait a minute...I thought TAD spilled coffee on the blueprints?
There's a dozen blueprints, all of which contradicting each other, most of them impossible to build, others plain insane.
Those last ones are the ones we want to use.
Deviled has uttered the enchantment, but the monument has not been created. This may mean doom for all of us.
Deviled has uttered the enchantment, but the monument has not been created. This may mean doom for all of us.
Deviled has uttered the enchantment, but the monument has not been created. This may mean doom for all of us.
Welp, nice knowing ya'll :P
Guess we'll be needing an enormous spectral forcefield created by the awakened spirits of the dead?
Journal of Gizogin, That Guy Who Mances Raws
Mego is annoyed with me for some reason. Claims I ruined some blueprints, or some such nonsense. As a genius in all areas worth being a genius in, I would never deface something of such merit as a set of blueprints! I would, however, improve any set of blueprints I felt needed improvement. Those blueprint's of Mego's were one such set. They were clearly lacking in dwarfishness, so I had to make them better. With booze!
Journal of Gizogin, That Guy Who Mances Raws
Mego is annoyed with me for some reason. Claims I ruined some blueprints, or some such nonsense. As a genius in all areas worth being a genius in, I would never deface something of such merit as a set of blueprints! I would, however, improve any set of blueprints I felt needed improvement. Those blueprint's of Mego's were one such set. They were clearly lacking in dwarfishness, so I had to make them better. With booze!
How exactly do you make a megaproject that murders an entire clown car in one shot MORE dwarfy?!
Journal of Gizogin, That Guy Who Mances Raws
Mego is annoyed with me for some reason. Claims I ruined some blueprints, or some such nonsense. As a genius in all areas worth being a genius in, I would never deface something of such merit as a set of blueprints! I would, however, improve any set of blueprints I felt needed improvement. Those blueprint's of Mego's were one such set. They were clearly lacking in dwarfishness, so I had to make them better. With booze!
How exactly do you make a megaproject that murders an entire clown car in one shot MORE dwarfy?!
I thought I made that abundantly clear! BY SOAKING IT WITH BOOZE! The only thing dwarfier than that is magma (and possibly socks), but some dwarves take soaking their work in magma as art defacement, or some such elfsense.
I've decided to change things up a bit from how they had gone originally. I'm taking advantage of my missing flash drive to add in some new story stuff.
Soundtrack for the next update. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UkvNmb9tMII)
I've decided to change things up a bit from how they had gone originally. I'm taking advantage of my missing flash drive to add in some new story stuff.
Soundtrack for the next update. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UkvNmb9tMII)
I've decided to change things up a bit from how they had gone originally. I'm taking advantage of my missing flash drive to add in some new story stuff.
Soundtrack for the next update. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UkvNmb9tMII)
Translation: I killed the fort at least twice in hilarious ways and got pictures of it happening.
Armok's blood and the blessed metal of Armok. Are we missing anything?MORE SOCKS!
SockCannon? It must be done!Armok's blood and the blessed metal of Armok. Are we missing anything?MORE SOCKS!
There is no such thing as enoughdakkasocks.
SockCannon? It must be done!Armok's blood and the blessed metal of Armok. Are we missing anything?MORE SOCKS!
There is no such thing as enoughdakkasocks.
KILL MAIM BURN!
Thanks for the idea.
*grabs a pick*
Count to the tenth dwarf, murder that one, and repeat.
Count to the tenth dwarf, murder that one, and repeat.
Urist, Cog, Likot, Reg, Astesh, Inod, Rakust, Erib, Ingish, Morul. *splargle*
Urist, Cog, Likot, Reg, Astesh, Inod, Rakust, Erib, Ingish, Rith. *shlink*
Urist, Cog, Likot, Reg, Astesh, Inod, Rakust, Erib, Ingish, Obok. *glirtch*
...
Hellcannon. Current population: 9.
The time travel was certainly shenanigans, but Xemorid most certainly is the same landscape and history as Aluonra, over a millenia after the second collapse of civilization into the darkness, and may well directly preclude a third. The RNG was not kind enough to maintain the name.
Now, whether or not there was mention of demons being summoned besides Ura and the Foul One she hosts is a good question...
In other news, during the last year at battlefaield there lived a dwarf by the name of Urist Boatclobbered. That's a very dorfy dorf if I've ever seen a dorf!
There was also Fikod Boatscarnage the Rough Boredom of Nature, most certainly a legendary militiaman.
Boats and Oars seemed very popular in Dastot Cog's history...
Also, why have there been like 50 pages since last time I was here? 0.0I only see 32 total.
Spoiler: History of Aluonra (click to show/hide)
Sooo... What's actually happening in the fort, Mego?Mego? Who is this Mego of which you speak? Oh! That one! Haven't heard from him in centuries! :P
I told you guys I was going to be gone all of yesterday and today. There's no time to play Dwarf Fortress when there is testing to do!
(I was at an academics competition. There were a lot of tests.)
I see 106.Also, why have there been like 50 pages since last time I was here? 0.0I only see 32 total.
I see 106.BURN THE HERETIC!
Nay magma is too good for him. Give him to the goblins.I see 106.BURN THE HERETIC!
My skills at precise counting clearly show I should be put in charge of a delicate megaproject.Also, why have there been like 50 pages since last time I was here? 0.0I only see 32 total.
I move to have CatalystParadox appointed henceforth as the sole supervisor of all megaprojects ever. Because clearly those amazing counting skills are awesome.My skills at precise counting clearly show I should be put in charge of a delicate megaproject.Also, why have there been like 50 pages since last time I was here? 0.0I only see 32 total.
The curse...
Journal of Mego, Former Chaos Crafter
I am afraid that I am no longer fit to lead Hellcannon. My fits of madness have made the others lose their faith in me. So, I will pass down the leadership to the next in line, Mormota. For the time being, I will lurk in the shadows, observing everything, quietly and subtly advancing my plans.
Mego(c)
Save here (http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=5453). The turn and dorfing lists probably won't be updated for a while. When I get better, I'll update them. Until then, best of luck. May the curse be with you.
I hope the next overseer goes and turn this fort into a maze like it's predecessors. What Eric said about the architecture is true, it's too... normal.
I suggest a 3D above-ground labyrinth for an entrance. One with random magma pits and boulder traps.I hope the next overseer goes and turn this fort into a maze like it's predecessors. What Eric said about the architecture is true, it's too... normal.
If Mormota doesn't, I'll do my best to eldritch-ify the crap out of the architecture.
EDIT: Just to clarify, no one will object if I use my turn to turn the fortress into an unnavigable mess of tunnels, magma, and death?
I'm thinking Death Waltz (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5F7GNQAO4T4&feature=related) in fortress form.If you do that, make every corridor a danger room. People who can't dodge shit can't be tolerated.
I'm thinking Death Waltz (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5F7GNQAO4T4&feature=related) in fortress form.If you do that, make every corridor a danger room. People who can't dodge shit can't be tolerated.
Oh wait. Shit.
I'm thinking Death Waltz (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5F7GNQAO4T4&feature=related) in fortress form.
Okay, so that's not actually the Death Waltz. That's "U.N. Owen Was Her."No difference.
Indeed. Patience certainly is not a trait of true dwarves.
Must know what's happening!
[MENT_ATT_RANGE:PATIENCE:450:950:1150:1250:1350:1550:2250] +
Well, you won't be waiting for too long, if Mormota doesn't show up it'll be your time to run this place.
I got just before winter started. By the United States' rules on presidential succession, you'll have more than half of my term, so it would count as your term. But, I don't really care. If you want a full turn in addition to the remnants of mine, be my guest. It's up to your discretion.
I got just before winter started. By the United States' rules on presidential succession, you'll have more than half of my term, so it would count as your term. But, I don't really care. If you want a full turn in addition to the remnants of mine, be my guest. It's up to your discretion.
Meh, I'm not a U.S. citizen (yet; it's (supposedly) in the works (I'm really just waiting on my parents, because if they become citizens, so do I)). I can't be president, so your rules don't apply to me! Anyway, It might not even be my decision, IF MORMOTA WOULD SHOW UP TO CLAIM HELLCANNON!
Why am I so impatient? I know everyone else on the turn list is going to have to wait longer than I will, and it really doesn't make any sense to be complaining, but darn it I'm going to complain anyway!
TO THE WALLS WITH YOU!
What is the point of this space? Presumably it was meant to be bedrooms at one point, but it's completely overgrown to the point where it's not worth trying to salvage anymore.Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Okay, I'm one with my responsibilities for today, so I have time for DF.
I know it may not have seemed that way from my last post, but I'm actually really happy with the state of Hellcannon. There isn't any real danger from the surface or the caverns, supply levels are reasonable, morale isn't terrible, and all industry is pretty much the way I like it. The only real problem I have is the complete lack of iron, but I completely forgot that green glass works just as well for magma pumps. I still haven't unpaused the game at all; I'm still planning. There'll probably be a real update coming later today.
EDIT: Just unpaused for the first time. 90 FPS!
As far as I recall, the landscape is all tundra, no glacier anywhere.
Luckily we do have an aquifer. A pretty big one too, I think a lot of the stone walls on the first cavern layer are just waiting for some foolish miner to swing their pick and cause another FPS-destroying flood.
As far as I recall, the landscape is all tundra, no glacier anywhere.
Luckily we do have an aquifer. A pretty big one too, I think a lot of the stone walls on the first cavern layer are just waiting for some foolish miner to swing their pick and cause another FPS-destroying flood.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
30 Timber 209:
Slime finished his project:
(http://tnypic.net/c4013.png)
(http://tnypic.net/cb939.png)
It's a vest with some battle scene on it. Not very useful, but pretty to look at.
Okay, I'm taking a bit of a break from playing, but I can check statuses and things like that if anyone's interested. Also, feedback: how am I doing? I'm probably going to play through to the end of 210, because I'm moving at a reasonable pace, unless anyone objects.
left over from the last world
*thread hop*I wasn't planning to, but I'm sure it'll happen eventually.
Um hello. Are you guys still planning on making Hellcannon a literal hellcannon?
Argh, the new release couldn't have come at a worse time. Now I have to choose between ending my turn early (thus sacrificing the turn I've been waiting for since Failcannon) or finishing the entire turn (but having to wait longer to get into DFVD).*thread hop*I wasn't planning to, but I'm sure it'll happen eventually.
Um hello. Are you guys still planning on making Hellcannon a literal hellcannon?
They sure do, it's Oltuloningul.
I used one of the possible translations of Rasputin, ie. распу́тица / muddy - road - season / rasputitsa to translate it into Dwarf, because I knew those three words making up Rasputitsa were in the dwarven language.
They sure do, it's Oltuloningul.
I used one of the possible translations of Rasputin, ie. распу́тица / muddy - road - season / rasputitsa to translate it into Dwarf, because I knew those three words making up Rasputitsa were in the dwarven language.
Uhhhhhhhhh.......... you know this how?
We can worry about battlefailed IV after hellcannon dies. For now, we can enjoy the serene landscape of the tundra. Especially the rivers of blood. There's no going back on Hellcannon. Mego has doomed us all, and there's no escaping it.
Summer 210:
Journal of Gizogin, Rawmancer:
NOTHING OF INTEREST, MOVE ALONG.
Oh, and my greatest project nears completion:
(http://tnypic.net/54493.png)
BWAHAHAHAHAHAAA!
Oh, and my greatest project nears completion:
(http://tnypic.net/54493.png)
BWAHAHAHAHAHAAA!
A mysterious row of levers with no documentation on what they do. You MONSTER!
Four of these levers are essential to the smooth operation of the fortress, five will kill everyone inside, and one releases a kitten. YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHICH IS WHICH!GOTTA SAVE THE KITTEH!
(Nah, I'm exaggerating. There isn't really a kitten.)
I make an artifact and there's not anything about it? Everyone else gets a screenshot and I get "but that's about it"?
You really hate me, don't you?
It's cool braw, I bet it was a crappy 1-item ring anyway.
Speaking of which, wasn't my dorf a woodcrafter?
God damn it. At least I still have my Lűk's vanguard, right?
Was that one of the military squads? I know there were only thirteen dwarves total in the military when I started, but I didn't pay attention to the specifics.
I'll be starting my run within a day or so. Today I'm busy with a college assignment, but tomorrow night should be free.
My first order of business will be to PULL ALL THE LEVERS!
I fired up the save and found all three traps. One started a fire in a cavern, another dropped a section of cavern on what I THINK was a farm, and the third started flooding the fortress.
Gotta ask though; how did you start the fire in the cavern? Couldn't see anything that started it off.<.< >.> v.v ^.^
I contacted Arcangelsd about the control room issue, and even though he and none of his other acquaintances can recall which lever did what, they were able to determine which ones were linked to the specialized defensive measures Gizogin installed.
DETERMINE
^ Personally, I prefer pits that menace with automated spiky impalement mechanisms. Preferrably made of glass, in the name of all that is painful. I suppose you could combine it with flooding+draining system, in case any goblins happen to survive falling and having a giant piece of glass forced through their body several hundred times.
So I'm checking out our artifact stockpile...Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Is my dwarf still alive? Or do I even have one?
Any Masons/Stonecrafters decide to visit the fort?
Any Masons/Stonecrafters decide to visit the fort?
Fortuneimpales indeed. How in the hell did Ieb manage to make a fungiwood ring (decorated with fungiwood) worth 362400 dwarfbucks!? And why wasn't this mentioned? It's worth more than all the other artifacts in the fortress combined, and one-tenth of the fortress itself.
-Incredibly smooth rock: I couldn't find any imperfection to the naked eye. Must add that it doesn't look like anything dwarfmade.
-The chamber forms a perfect circle: after precise measurings, I discovered that it fulfills the Uristhagorean theorem to the nth degree of accuracy.
-Sound probes revealed something.. unnerving. The entire chamber VIBRATES. At the same frequency. I must do some pressure test in there...
Or studying an engineering degree =D-Incredibly smooth rock: I couldn't find any imperfection to the naked eye. Must add that it doesn't look like anything dwarfmade.
-The chamber forms a perfect circle: after precise measurings, I discovered that it fulfills the Uristhagorean theorem to the nth degree of accuracy.
-Sound probes revealed something.. unnerving. The entire chamber VIBRATES. At the same frequency. I must do some pressure test in there...
Somebody has been reading Dean Koontz.
Gizogin refuses to accept that I am a man, for whatever reason.
Journal of Erica, Head Stoneworker of Hellcannon
And give him the profession name "Priest of Armok".
And give him the profession name "Priest of Armok".
And make sure his beard is dark auburn, with two braids, and maybe some strawberry blonde highlights in the moustache. And make sure he likes cows for their haunting moos and detests tuber beer and giant rat meat. Oh, and make him shy, and have eidetic memory while you're at it, please? :P
Contemplating whether killing you would be appropriate considering the dwarves now recognize that you're a jackass and rigged the whole fortress to be destroyed...
Contemplating whether killing you would be appropriate considering the dwarves now recognize that you're a jackass and rigged the whole fortress to be destroyed...
I just realised that a very easy, somewhat suitable way of getting rid of undesirables (such as dissidents or former leaders) would be to put them in one of the ex-bedrooms in the soil layer with a pick, wall off the entrance and then give them the option of either digging up and waiting for the wilddeath or just starving. You know, just throwing that out there.
Wait a minute... Did you actually disable my traps? I certainly hope you didn't, because that would be a bad idea.
Now I wish I'd thought to set up some sort of double-failsafe, where a certain combination of the levers has to be pulled every month to prevent a massive magma flood. Then you'd be screwed no matter what! But alas, I didn't think to do that, and I'm not sure I'd know how anyway.
Wait a minute... Did you actually disable my traps? I certainly hope you didn't, because that would be a bad idea.
Now I wish I'd thought to set up some sort of double-failsafe, where a certain combination of the levers has to be pulled every month to prevent a massive magma flood. Then you'd be screwed no matter what! But alas, I didn't think to do that, and I'm not sure I'd know how anyway.
What you want is a sacrificial pit with a pressure trap at the bottom. Hook it up to a slow-spreading magma clock that will activate something fatal to the fort if it's not drained regularly by the sacrificial pit.
Wait a minute... Did you actually disable my traps? I certainly hope you didn't, because that would be a bad idea.
Now I wish I'd thought to set up some sort of double-failsafe, where a certain combination of the levers has to be pulled every month to prevent a massive magma flood. Then you'd be screwed no matter what! But alas, I didn't think to do that, and I'm not sure I'd know how anyway.
2-3 days seems fair for most succession games...
Yeah... Kinda depressing.
I would do that, but then I'd only indulge in self-deprecating propaganda.Not self-promoting?
When dealing with a LP of DF the two are one in the same. I mean a good DF story is usually full of fail, incompetence, and oversights. Granted not all stories need that, but it is a good rule of thumb.I would do that, but then I'd only indulge in self-deprecating propaganda.Not self-promoting?
(http://img198.imageshack.us/img198/2203/38169741.png)
Yeah, I'm going to have to drop out of this, I'm afraid.
What, that's fairly solid.
(http://img198.imageshack.us/img198/2203/38169741.png)
Yeah, I'm going to have to drop out of this, I'm afraid.
(http://img692.imageshack.us/img692/7199/hellcannonfps.png)
Alright, I'm in. Where do I toss my sanity?
Everything That Assuie Guy says is quote-worthy. WHY NOT ME?! I'M INSANE TOO!!You're the EAGER insane one, we'd be drowning in quotes if EVERYTHING was quote worthy.
Everything That Assuie Guy says is quote-worthy. WHY NOT ME?! I'M INSANE TOO!!
I belive Toady said that 0.31.25 saves are not compatible with the 0.34.x versions.
Where's my update? I need to know what's happening!I opened the fortress. Now I'm fucking around in Wurm. Happy? :P
Soldiers will practice individually even when not active. When active, the only difference is that on their scheduled months, they go on soldier-mode automatically and take/participate in lessons or spar. Not to mention automatically attack any hostile they might encounter(which I hope is never, considering how deep into the fort our barracks are, or were if they've been relocated).
- Pump pressurized demon-filled magma to the surface and fire them at elves.FTFY
Huh, we're approaching reply No.1812 and we have no cannon(s) to show for it. I am severely disappointed in this fort ::)
Teaser time!
(http://img18.imageshack.us/img18/2395/8c8e43b442e34ef5aaa60c7.png)
Urist Imiknorris died from thirst. While in panic room. Which was sealed despite me not giving orders to seal it.
Urist Imiknorris died from thirst. While in panic room. Which was sealed despite me not giving orders to seal it.
I blame Aussie.
Time to continue the insanity. (http://www.twitch.tv/darayavaush)
More teasers time!
(http://img195.imageshack.us/img195/3669/9964b6feb74743e898258b1.png)
(http://img193.imageshack.us/img193/4687/e91962d37fb942de858f434.png)
Can you guess what could this possibly be?!
In other news, the magma is pumped to the level right below the surface. Brainstorming for applications time!
Why did you leave a safe path? The bridges could easily have covered the whole corridor.Because this is the only entrance into the fortress. Also, the bridges are automated, raising and lowering every 100 ticks or so.
Magma cannonToo much work on all four counts, but freeze trap is probably the most viable of them. I'll see what I can do.
Freeze trap (use the magma to keep the water liquid, then remove it to freeze the water)
Obsidianization trap
Magmafalls everywhere!
(http://img207.imageshack.us/img207/1783/247cd7c433f1457ea9038bf.png)
In the northern corner: a horde of migrants on a bridge. In the southern corner: a berserk camel in the totally inaccessible trade depot. Migrants can't pass the camel, soldiers can't access the depot to kill it. Add Yakety Sax and get the awesomest chase scene ever. What should I do? :(
Isn't that why crossbows are for?No crossbows, no crossbowdwarves, no archery targets. Going through the whole process just to get rid of one quadripedal piece of shit seems just too much hassle.
Tut tut.
honk HONKTut tut.
Imagine a dwarf. Stained in blood and vomit. And more blood. Wiping his battleaxe on the sock of a dead dwarf. Turning around to you. His eyes bulging. His breath smelling. His nose dripping. He opens his mouth. And with a voice soaked in loathing and despise, he throws at you the following two words:
Tut tut.
I died as I lived.
In the wrong place, at the wrong time.
Tut tut.
Imagine a dwarf. Stained in blood and vomit. And more blood. Wiping his battleaxe on the sock of a dead dwarf. Turning around to you. His eyes bulging. His breath smelling. His nose dripping. He opens his mouth. And with a voice soaked in loathing and despise, he throws at you the following two words:
Tut tut.
I find it amusing how these forts always have major incidents occur because of decisions done years ago, that no one remembers/can bother to check through a bazillion pages to get to that one tiny post about THAT LEVER, or whatever.This post sums up every catastrophe in a succession fort ever.
Two questions: Who was that soldier? And is my dwarfs still alive?Some random guy named Feb Fathor. And yep, you're still alive.
FTFYTwo questions: Who was that soldier? And is my dwarfs still alive?Some random guy named Feb Fathor. And yep, you're still alive.
Now seriously, how do I make my dwarves spar instead of watching demonstrations?
Also, I won't be doing redorfings due to the TERRIFIC death rate.
So is the aquifer a big problem?
as long as you don't go diggin in the topmost Z of the first cavern and the lowest soil layer, no.
Nope, cavern water.So... this?So is the aquifer a big problem?as long as you don't go diggin in the topmost Z of the first cavern and the lowest soil layer, no.
Oh dear Armok... Tell me I survived...I find your sanity undwarfy. And yes, you're still alive. Temporarily. ]:->
Send everyone to the panic room (set civilian alert to !!PANIC!!), and lock the doors. There's a farm and a still in there, adn plenty of excess food. That will make managing this catastrophe a tad bit easier.
There are two levers. One on either side.Nnnnnope, I'm pretty sure there's only one.
(http://img141.imageshack.us/img141/5182/6e00f3fa771046c18545d89.png)
Protip: don't wander outside (where everything is forbidden) across the fucking Crusher in the middle of a fucking siege.
I hope to god I don't have to fix another permanent flood again. That shit took half the year last time.
situation where dwarves are exploding for no reasonThat's malicious slander! The only dwarf explosions in Hellcannon can be fully justified by drawbridges crashing onto their heads!
Btw dariush, you said I survived but didn't mention anyone with hammer skills. Did I die or am I not bring trained in hammer use or did you just forget?I didn't check anyone's hammer skills, since I prefer swords and axes.
A long line of somber looking dwarves, all named Gizogin told me that I could do some thing with the fabric of reality, like graffiti?
Darvi = creative.That made me choke right now.
Staying dead requires proper burials. The overseers need to learn how to bury the dead, before they possess someone else and suppress their soul out of existence.
head of Erica's Stoneworker Army. (Or was he?)
I've been granted the save during mid-autumn I believe, so I think I'll just go on and take it to another mid-autumn..Actually, it was midwinter.
there's an aquifer leaking into the caverns horribly mangling the FPSEr, if you're talking about the first cavern level, it can be turned off by a lever in the lever room (I needed water to fill the lower cavern). If you're talking about the second level, that reservoire is going to be used for the hospital well and is actually filled from the first level.
[/size][/font][/b][/color][/center]Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Damnit Seth, stop breaking reality. It doesn't need any help.
Also Gizogin stop writing on the walls Armokdamnit.
I'm just waiting for someone to take a war hammer to the walls of space and time.
You know, I somewhat expect that, whenever the Battlefailed history truly ends, it will turn out that TAD is the main villain and responsible for everything, including the deaths of the forts.
That would explain why we didn't get killed by the sieges during our first months in Failcannon. Y'know, when TAD and I couldn't get into the fort.
Dude bribed the goblins.
Y'know, when TAD and I couldn't get into the fort.Yeah, I kinda doubt that.
Y'know, when TAD and I couldn't get into the fort.Yeah, I kinda doubt that.
warrant a rescue by the military...And nobody died in the Crusher? Did you get the wrong save from before it was built?
the repeater's broken*eye twitch*
That would explain why we didn't get killed by the sieges during our first months in Failcannon. Y'know, when TAD and I couldn't get into the fort.
Dude bribed the goblins.
That would explain why we didn't get killed by the sieges during our first months in Failcannon. Y'know, when TAD and I couldn't get into the fort.
Dude bribed the goblins.
He didn't bribe the goblins...Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Also Darvi, did you just admit to being in cohorts with TAD? I would threaten you with death, but that's the favorite pastime of the Battlefailed forts.
Instead, I'll threaten you with LIFE!
Instead, I'll threaten you with LIFE!
Geez, what's everybody suffocating from?
Also Darvi, did you just admit to being in cohorts with TAD?No, he was my cohort. Or so I thought at the moment, as I am sure he arranged our exile.
Sign me up for another turn. If I haven't died of old age by the time I get my turn that is...
...no one ever died unless he met with an accident that prevented him from living.
Sign me up for another turn. If I haven't died of old age by the time I get my turn that is...
Don't worry about that, dwarves don't die of old age in the Battlefailed series. In a way it is like the Land of Oz books.
I was talking about myself. Expect another Master outbreak on my turn.Sign me up for another turn. If I haven't died of old age by the time I get my turn that is...
Don't worry about that, dwarves don't die of old age in the Battlefailed series. In a way it is like the Land of Oz books.
He was probably talking about himself, not his dwarf.
And look, I have turn 32. This is going to be a long wait.
I was talking about myself. Expect another Master outbreak on my turn.Sign me up for another turn. If I haven't died of old age by the time I get my turn that is...
Don't worry about that, dwarves don't die of old age in the Battlefailed series. In a way it is like the Land of Oz books.
He was probably talking about himself, not his dwarf.
And look, I have turn 32. This is going to be a long wait.
I was talking about myself. Expect another Master outbreak on my turn.Sign me up for another turn. If I haven't died of old age by the time I get my turn that is...
Don't worry about that, dwarves don't die of old age in the Battlefailed series. In a way it is like the Land of Oz books.
He was probably talking about himself, not his dwarf.
And look, I have turn 32. This is going to be a long wait.
If we kill everyone but you then you can't make anyone else the master.
Is that a challenge?
our increasingly legendary seven dwarves [...] can handle [...] skelk
I think by now we should all be aware that death is no where near permanent. If anything a Eldridge abomination destroying the world would be an improvement.
[...]the inevitable mass slaughterings.
I think by now we should all be aware that death is no where near permanent. If anything a Eldridge abomination destroying the world would be an improvement.
I dunno, he seems pretty harmless (http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/7/7c/Charles_W._Eldridge.png) to me tbh. :P
...seven dwarves worth of a militia....
Please, the fort survived with 0 dorfs for a time. I bet the Foul One can only enter Aluonra if TAD dies for good.
TAD abused vampires before they even got implemented.
TAD is Dracula.
Hey, Dracula was killed by simultaneous decapitation and chest-impalement.
Anyway, has TAD now become this memetic character who's never surprised by anything, and is, in fact, responsible for everything ever? I can support that.
You conned Hell out of its riches. A few dwarves shouldn't be a problem.
Aaand updated the TvTropes page with the recent revelations about TAD.
I have found the perfect description of how the story of the Battlefailed forts will be told in the future. (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/NoodleIncident)
So, in that picture, I noticed an even more massive set of levers than the one I put in. I heartily approve. At a rough estimate, how many of them will kill everyone?
I have found the perfect description of how the story of the Battlefailed forts will be told in the future. (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/NoodleIncident)
Certainly how the foundation of Hellcannon will be referenced...
Master of Disguise: That Aussie Dwarf. And because they're dwarves, Wig, Dress, Accent works marvelously.
I would also like to direct your attention to the newly created WMG page.
So, I am SUDDENLY dead, my turn is marked as skipped and my Crusher is fucked up. Fucking fuck.
Also, why the fuck did you delete all the notes? :-/
The best part about the big succession games isFTFYit actually feels likethat you're actually making history, both in the game world and in the community.
This is what I love about DF.
The best part is these guys pretty much played with the events that were handed to them each in their own way. It forms a rather oddly cohesive story despite the randomness of DF and the general insanity of anyone playing the game.
Yeah, I haven't got a single idea what caused the game to flip out like that. I did claim it's the 42th incarnation in summer's picdump. Guy disappeared from the unit list after all the deaths, so I just went with it, counted them up, and called it #42. Feel free to tone it down to #2 if you don't agree with my way of counting things.
Andreus ain't got shit on the immortal president.
Good read. Gizogin at least lived up to his name this time around. When he died at the end of Failcannon, he was hiding naked in his quarters from a swarm of bloodthirsty kobolds, and I only let him out to end the damn thing. Not exactly impressive or bad-ass. More like a scared child in a closet.
Yeah, I haven't got a single idea what caused the game to flip out like that. I did claim it's the 42th incarnation in summer's picdump. Guy disappeared from the unit list after all the deaths, so I just went with it, counted them up, and called it #42. Feel free to tone it down to #2 if you don't agree with my way of counting things.
Actually, that makes it even more impressive.
Also, my second turn is ever closer. Aw yeah. Here's to hoping it'll be after my exam week so I can actually focus and finish it on timely fashion, wouldn't want to hold this up by a few days so other people can have a turn too.
Clearly Hellcannon is a sentient and evil eldritch abomination and is bringing back the dead to prevent a follow-up to the cosmos-wrecking catastrophe that is Failcannon.
That's right kids. You scared the shit out of Yogg Sothoth.
Clearly Hellcannon is a sentient and evil eldritch abomination and is bringing back the dead to prevent a follow-up to the cosmos-wrecking catastrophe that is Failcannon.
That's right kids. You scared the shit out of Yogg Sothoth.
"Did You Just Scare The Shit Out of Cthulhu?"
Andreus ain't got shit on the immortal president.
Good read. Gizogin at least lived up to his name this time around. When he died at the end of Failcannon, he was hiding naked in his quarters from a swarm of bloodthirsty kobolds, and I only let him out to end the damn thing. Not exactly impressive or bad-ass. More like a scared child in a closet.
He's not supposed to know that.
Andreus ain't got shit on the immortal president.
Good read. Gizogin at least lived up to his name this time around. When he died at the end of Failcannon, he was hiding naked in his quarters from a swarm of bloodthirsty kobolds, and I only let him out to end the damn thing. Not exactly impressive or bad-ass. More like a scared child in a closet.
He's not supposed to know that.
But...
What?
:'(
*snip*
Just started taking a serious look around the fortress, trying to figure out what's happening and what's going on and what needs to be done... And I found a room with - and this isn't an exaggeration - A HUNDRED LEVERS. Most are off. Several are on. Only three are labeled.
Armok help us.
Dark_T_Zeratul, could you please change my profession to "Not a goblin spy"? It wasn't changed during the dorfing wave.Got it, and updated my previous post.
*There is an undead cave ogre on fire in the magma that is somehow not dead-dead.
*There is an undead cave ogre on fire in the magma that is somehow not dead-dead.
He dropped in while the First Battle of Hellcannon was winding down, during my turn. He's just been down there, on fire, ever since. He's like our good-luck charm, so long as that Skeletal Blind Cave Ogre is happily sitting at the bottom of the magma sea Hellcannon cannot fall :P
.....that actually kinda works, can somebody get that into the lore?
*There is an undead cave ogre on fire in the magma that is somehow not dead-dead.
He dropped in while the First Battle of Hellcannon was winding down, during my turn. He's just been down there, on fire, ever since. He's like our good-luck charm, so long as that Skeletal Blind Cave Ogre is happily sitting at the bottom of the magma sea Hellcannon cannot fall :P
.....that actually kinda works, can somebody get that into the lore?
Talk to the historian. And TAD. He kinda runs things around here.
I bet someone is going to drop a cave-in on top of that ogre just because of that.*There is an undead cave ogre on fire in the magma that is somehow not dead-dead.
He dropped in while the First Battle of Hellcannon was winding down, during my turn. He's just been down there, on fire, ever since. He's like our good-luck charm, so long as that Skeletal Blind Cave Ogre is happily sitting at the bottom of the magma sea Hellcannon cannot fall :P
.....that actually kinda works, can somebody get that into the lore?
Talk to the historian. And TAD. He kinda runs things around here.
Of course! It's in the magma sea, that makes it the only denizen of the fortress TAD can't bribe, convert, corrupt, or otherwise reach!
Speaking about history...
The one reason I haven't yet uploaded the Battlefailed Archive (does not include Hellcannon. I'll wait for it to end before doing adding it.) is because I feel it is still quite messy. And could use an index of sorts. And I am somewhat intimidated by the task of indexing that monster.
So it's more like three reasons.
Speaking about history...
The one reason I haven't yet uploaded the Battlefailed Archive (does not include Hellcannon. I'll wait for it to end before doing adding it.) is because I feel it is still quite messy. And could use an index of sorts. And I am somewhat intimidated by the task of indexing that monster.
So it's more like three reasons.
Do like the Australians do: Upload it, and have someone else do it for you.
casual readersAs opposed to what, hardcore readers?
(Maybe current overseer could work on slabbing the dead?)I'm discovering that when your fortress has this many dead, slabbing them becomes incredibly irritating. Reudh II is the first ghost in the unit list, and yet after scrolling through the list of names twice when making a memorial slab, I don't see him. There really needs to be a search function.
I'm discovering that when your fortress has this many dead, slabbing them becomes incredibly irritating.
Reudh II is the first ghost in the unit list, and yet after scrolling through the list of names twice when making a memorial slab, I don't see him. There really needs to be a search function.
unless there's a tantrum spiral or the defenses are breached (or an overseer gets tired of your constant job canceled spam) you'll probably survive for quite a while.
8th Felsite, 214
Stormtemplar the 2nd has somehow become "myseriously" locked in his room.
We see what you did there. (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Recap/DoctorWhoNSS4E17E18TheEndOfTime)Stop quoting me! D:
Could I get bumped down one spot in the overseer list? Judging from the speed DTZ is handling the fort, I'd get the pass in the middle of my exam week and I don't want to hold up the game by a few days since we have a good flow going on here.
You're saying that e don't have enough cat-loving dorfs.
Hellcannon trivia: Ghills was #18 to request dorfing, on post #46. To this date, he still hasn't gotten a dorf.That's not true. He was dwarfed when I got the save. Most recently, he was complaining that the skreinder I ordered him to kill was preventing him from picking up the equipment needed to kill it.
Stozu: Hey.
Stuzo: Yeah?
Stozu: You ever wonder why we're here?
Stuzo: It’s one of life’s great mysteries isn’t it? Why are we here? I mean, are we the product of some cosmic coincidence, or is there really an Armok watching everything? You know, with a plan for us and stuff. I don’t know, man. But it keeps me up at night.
Stozu: ...........What?! I mean why are we out here, in this freezing wasteland.
Stuzo: Oh. Uh... yeah.
Stozu: What was all that stuff about Armok?
Stuzo: Uh...hm? Nothing.
Stozu: You wanna talk about it?
Stuzo: No.
Stozu: You sure?
Stuzo: Yeah.
Stozu: Seriously though, why are we out here? As far as I can tell, it's just a freezing wasteland in the middle of nowhere. No way in or out.
Stuzo: Mm hmm.
Stozu: The only reason that we set up a camp here, is because they have a fortress over there. And the only reason they have a fortress over there, is, well... Ok we don't have any clue why they're retarded enough to be here.
I think it's more that there is so much death and we are still here so there must be something good here. Or goblins are insane. I'm surprised that goblins don't retch on site when they arrive, I mean we have painted a big fuck you in goblin blood all across the tundra.
Too bad the fort doesn't have glass available. That would have been a massive boost to it's defensibility.I seized a ton of sand from the elves.
All must serve El Presidente! Death is no excuse not to.
All must serve El Presidente! Death is no excuse not to.
Did I ever mention that I nicknamed you Pedro in my head?
You are that dwarf.Unless someone changed that dorf's name, it's name is Kar something.
On the morn of Granite first
From a hangover most dwarvenly
Did rise those fateful starting seven
What a party last night!
...
Andreus, Father of Heroes
Slain by flying shit monster
Didn’t see that coming,
Immortal Philosopher-general?
Shem Shipdusts,
Shit Slayer
Battlefailed commends you
Even though everyone suffocated.
...I don't even...I have absolutely no idea. When I got the save, you were already spamming job canceled announcements due to not being able to pick anything up.
1. How did I lose my hands?
2. Why did no one mention this
Mr. Zeratul, would we be able to get a list of the dwarves currently dwarfed during your turn?The list on page 135 is still pretty close to accurate. Most of the other people who have not yet been dwarfed requested professions that don't exist among the undwarfed dwarves.
Hellcannon trivia: Ghills was #18 to request dorfing, on post #46. To this date, he still hasn't gotten a dorf.That's not true. He was dwarfed when I got the save. Most recently, he was complaining that the skreinder I ordered him to kill was preventing him from picking up the equipment needed to kill it.
John Smith?
But we'll never have a legitimate crazy cat lady if this keeps up!
all according to plan...
I arrived here at HELLCANNON on the trail of my BASTARD FAMILY WHO LEFT ME WITH WOLVES at the age of TWO.And then Reudh founded Rome.
I am not a poet, I'm a geology student!So you have a very keen insight into the Dwarven writing style, then.
Gizogin wants to be CMD, and Reudh wants to be the nurse...
Get the fanfics ready, folks.
If you wouldn't mind, next overseer, please reforbid whatever it is my dorf insists he must have. It's probably his shoe or something.I really wish I knew what it was. He has all his labors turned off, and the "Pickup Equipment" spam persists.
What exactly caused the injuries to my foot, anyway?Dunno. You were like that when I got the save.
Am I literally unable to perform any labors?Presumably due more to the nerve damage than the missing foot, yes as far as I can tell.
The same weapon killed me twice... I shall have my revenge.I'm not sure which dwarf you are; what are you taking revenge on?
Gizogin wants to be CMD, and Reudh wants to be the nurse...
Get the fanfics ready, folks.
...
I'm appalled, yet morbidly fascinated.
In order to help people find the last turn, copy this to the first page:
Dark_T_Zeratul (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3136361#msg3136361) 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3136663#msg3136663) 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3137764#msg3137764) 4 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3139439#msg3139439) 5 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3142250#msg3142250) 6 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3145078#msg3145078) 7 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3151410#msg3151410) 8 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3154193#msg3154193) 9 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3154937#msg3154937) 10 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3155471#msg3155471) 11 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3155856#msg3155856)
EDIT:Fixing links, messed up bad.
Fixed
Conchobar. I shall have my revenge on the weapon that lured me to my death through a cunning strategy that probably involves me being lured to my death some more.The same weapon killed me twice... I shall have my revenge.I'm not sure which dwarf you are; what are you taking revenge on?
Why do I keep dying but nobody redorfs me? :( Dariush *insert number*, anybody useful. Preferably a legendary. Maybe a noble.
I had to downgrade to Vista recently, and my computer is much slower ever since.
Reudh was indifferent about operating systems lately, though he will admit Vista is bloaty.
Ghills, go ahead and play what you can. A partial year is better than nothing.
Ieb: What kind of maths?
I had to use something completely inferior to Linux recently, and my computer is much slower ever since.
FTFY.
Mego was disgusted by an inferior OS recently.
Gee, I was just about to call that out.
It's only been two days.
Which, granted, is an eternity on this forum.
The human traders actually got here, and we actually managed to trade with them, despite the broker getting a strange mood *after* they arrived and I flipped the "broker needed at depot" setting. He's already named (Kar Puwuncob, profession El Presidente), but I'm wondering whether his profession should really be "Wally" https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Dilbert_characters#Wally (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Dilbert_characters#Wally) for sheer dedication to refusing to do his job. Any thoughts?
The human traders actually got here, and we actually managed to trade with them, despite the broker getting a strange mood *after* they arrived and I flipped the "broker needed at depot" setting. He's already named (Kar Puwuncob, profession El Presidente), but I'm wondering whether his profession should really be "Wally" https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Dilbert_characters#Wally (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Dilbert_characters#Wally) for sheer dedication to refusing to do his job. Any thoughts?
No, he's earned the right to his own name. He's the dwarf that somehow keeps reincarnating whenever he dies. You'd better ensure he gets whatever he needs for his mood though. I suspect a mood shift might be permanent through all his reincarnations. Wouldn't want an eternal beserker roaming the halls...
The human traders actually got here, and we actually managed to trade with them, despite the broker getting a strange mood *after* they arrived and I flipped the "broker needed at depot" setting. He's already named (Kar Puwuncob, profession El Presidente), but I'm wondering whether his profession should really be "Wally" https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Dilbert_characters#Wally (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Dilbert_characters#Wally) for sheer dedication to refusing to do his job. Any thoughts?
No, he's earned the right to his own name. He's the dwarf that somehow keeps reincarnating whenever he dies. You'd better ensure he gets whatever he needs for his mood though. I suspect a mood shift might be permanent through all his reincarnations. Wouldn't want an eternal beserker roaming the halls...
AND WHY THE HELL NOT?
Yes! It's angry mob time.The human traders actually got here, and we actually managed to trade with them, despite the broker getting a strange mood *after* they arrived and I flipped the "broker needed at depot" setting. He's already named (Kar Puwuncob, profession El Presidente), but I'm wondering whether his profession should really be "Wally" https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Dilbert_characters#Wally (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Dilbert_characters#Wally) for sheer dedication to refusing to do his job. Any thoughts?
No, he's earned the right to his own name. He's the dwarf that somehow keeps reincarnating whenever he dies. You'd better ensure he gets whatever he needs for his mood though. I suspect a mood shift might be permanent through all his reincarnations. Wouldn't want an eternal beserker roaming the halls...
AND WHY THE HELL NOT?
Shall I fetch the torches and pitchforks?
So I'm dead again? Great. All I want for Christmas is enough time alive to write a living diary entry.
Or, if you want to cut out the middleman (with a spoon), you could do what I did and engrave your thoughts on the firmament of reality itself. Be advised, however, that you then take full responsibility for the fortress becoming a lot more Fun.
You know, after reading through that WMG on Tvtropes about TAD, I just came up with an alternate explanation for how he never seems to die.
He's a dwarven version of Doctor Doom!
He hasn't been killing and taking the place of random migrants, those were all actuallyDoomAussiebots. It stands to reason therefore, that the real Aussie Dwarf has never appeared in the Battlefailed Saga.
You know, after reading through that WMG on Tvtropes about TAD, I just came up with an alternate explanation for how he never seems to die.
He's a dwarven version of Doctor Doom!
He hasn't been killing and taking the place of random migrants, those were all actuallyDoomAussiebots. It stands to reason therefore, that the real Aussie Dwarf has never appeared in the Battlefailed Saga.
It still surprises me how far a simple joke about my dwarf avoiding all the bad stuff happening in Failcannon as evolved into this.
I told the damn miners to hurry up already, some lunatic named "Eric the Second" has been screaming in pain down in the entrance for weeks now. By the time I can attempt some sort of half-assed surgery on him, he'll probably have succumbed to infection.He's been that way since before my turn started, so on the plus side, he's not suffering from anything inevitably fatal without treatment. On the minus side, he's not suffering from anything that CAN be treated, so you'll have to deal with his screaming in some other fashion.
I told the damn miners to hurry up already, some lunatic named "Eric the Second" has been screaming in pain down in the entrance for weeks now. By the time I can attempt some sort of half-assed surgery on him, he'll probably have succumbed to infection.He's been that way since before my turn started, so on the plus side, he's not suffering from anything inevitably fatal without treatment. On the minus side, he's not suffering from anything that CAN be treated, so you'll have to deal with his screaming in some other fashion.
On the minus side, he's not suffering from anything that CAN be treated, so you'll have to deal with his screaming in some other fashion.
[...] so you'll have to deal with his screaming in some other fashion.
[...] anything inevitably fatal [...]
The fact that I cannot stand nor grasp items is a fatal blow. I'm dead.
Now is an excellent time to become a necromancer ghost and possess another dorf.
DO NOT bury my corpse. Ever. Even if my ghost is violent and/or murderous, I demand a supernatural manifestation, as well as any unclaimed miner or mason (same parameters as already on the dorfing list.) For story purposes... :P
My fort in an evil desert finally fell just as I was about to complete my 20 or so z-level magma pump stack that would enable me to scour the surface of all unlife.
I fail to see why perma-burning zombies would be a problem.My fort in an evil desert finally fell just as I was about to complete my 20 or so z-level magma pump stack that would enable me to scour the surface of all unlife.
Wouldn't it have just set them on fire? Magma doesn't cause HP damage, so it wouldn't hurt undead. That's why Hellcannon still has a skeletal blind cave ogre sitting in the magma sea.
I fail to see why perma-burning zombies would be a problem.My fort in an evil desert finally fell just as I was about to complete my 20 or so z-level magma pump stack that would enable me to scour the surface of all unlife.
Wouldn't it have just set them on fire? Magma doesn't cause HP damage, so it wouldn't hurt undead. That's why Hellcannon still has a skeletal blind cave ogre sitting in the magma sea.
Do we currently have a CMD? Also, am I alive presently? If no and yes, I would very much like to become the CMD, because of stuff that happened in the "If Bay Forum were a mountain hall" thread.At the moment, my dwarf is the CMD for storyline purposes. I'll be sure to step down as CMD at the end of the The Doctor's reign and promote you to the newly-vacated position.
Im in militia right? Or am I dead already?It seems you have passed into the void. I've got 4 new migrants, so do we have a list? If not, I'll just give them out first come first serve.
Do we currently have a CMD? Also, am I alive presently? If no and yes, I would very much like to become the CMD, because of stuff that happened in the "If Bay Forum were a mountain hall" thread.At the moment, my dwarf is the CMD for storyline purposes. I'll be sure to step down as CMD at the end of the The Doctor's reign and promote you to the newly-vacated position.Im in militia right? Or am I dead already?It seems you have passed into the void. I've got 4 new migrants, so do we have a list? If not, I'll just give them out first come first serve.
Just checking in to see what's going on, as I've been spending a lot of time on other boards. Updates are always good news, and so is the fact that I'm somehow still alive. Maybe I can stay that way for a while this time.You actually got incredibly lucky, you barely escaped the goblin menace when I was putting up the door :P
Did anything happen between the last update and the end of the turn?Nothing notable, the artefact is still in progress.
Wait... Your turn is finished?Yes, I'm just not going to have the time to finish, sadly :-\
Does this mean you didn't finish the year? If so, where did you stop?Wait... Your turn is finished?Yes, I'm just not going to have the time to finish, sadly :-\
...Assuming Hellcannon lasts that long, I'd like a second turn.
Near the end of Opal. Pretty close to late winter.Does this mean you didn't finish the year? If so, where did you stop?Wait... Your turn is finished?Yes, I'm just not going to have the time to finish, sadly :-\
So did Reudh III get dwarfed?Sadly, no, I haven't been able to get any migrants into the fort.
Also... I'm wondering how Kar Puwuncobi came about.
Given that Gizogin destabilised the fabric of reality by drawing on it a few times, surely the same dwarf dying 42 times should be pretty-bloody-bad?
I think we need a drawing of Andreus, Gizogin and Kar Puwuncobi as ghosts, looking mildly confused while reality itself twists around them. :P
I'd like to ask something: people are not trying to use the fort in the 2012 version, are they? I'm copying the rest of the turns into the text file and I can see no mention of it being transferred (not that it'd work, I think) or keeping it in 0.31.25. Some posters, however, seemed to think that the save was compatible, so I find it's best to make sure. Also, Mego, could you please change the thread title in order to indicate that we are using 0.31.25?
EDIT: Updated version of archive (http://dl.dropbox.com/u/55435372/BATTLEFAILED.doc). I know I've been asking for a lot of things, but, if possible, could you stick that link in the OP should anyone want it?
Looks like CatalystParadox is up. I guess that means a loyalty cascade or something similar.
My guess is it's disliking graphics. I'll try again either tomorrow or late with the nice raw ASCII graphics and see if that behaves any better.
Mego; I asked for another turn again quite some time ago. Where am I on that list? I just wanted another chance to start some fires! :(
I think you missed my request too.
I expect you'll MAKE it dead? :P
THANK JEGUS I FINALLY GOT EVERYTHING UPDATED!
Oh bloody hell, I got a few hours in, thought everything was working, and then it crashed again...
:(
I don't know what the hell the problem is, but I think Hellcannon might hate me. I had exciting plans for actually trying to BUILD a Hellcannon - which probably would have ended up destroying the fort instead. So far what was happening was no one wanted to dig despite having plenty with the labor enabled and more than enough picks, though.
I'll post a quick update in a little while from the screenshots I took, we can assume it all happened in Catalyst's deranged mind, and you let me know if you're patient enough to try this as I repeatedly crash half the times I try to make an update.
THANK JEGUS I FINALLY GOT EVERYTHING UPDATED!
Kind of a bitch after a while isn't it?
THANK JEGUS I FINALLY GOT EVERYTHING UPDATED!
Kind of a bitch after a while isn't it?
You can say that again. Actually, don't. GO MAKE SOME FUCKING SLABS.
THANK JEGUS I FINALLY GOT EVERYTHING UPDATED!
Kind of a bitch after a while isn't it?
You can say that again. Actually, don't. GO MAKE SOME FUCKING SLABS.
GET BACK TO WORK ON THE WAAAAALLLS!!
..Sorry, don't know what came over me for a moment there.
Catalyst, you may be able to complete your turn if you save all the time. Yes, it's going to be very annoying, but, if you keep experiencing crashes, it may be the only way.
And, if so, in figuring out the fort?
And, if so, in figuring out the fort?
You should know the answer to that question already.
Off topic: Deathsword, what is the deal with the penguin avatars?Go to general discussion. Easier this way.
Off topic: Deathsword, what is the deal with the penguin avatars?Go to general discussion. Easier this way.
Actually unless something HILARIOUS occurs or someone actively does something HILARIOUS this fort has a pretty good chance of going strong.
We just need to play to our strengths.
As long as we have soldiers within the fort, we have skilled soldiers ready to take on any forgotten beastie or berserker or whatever.
Actually unless something HILARIOUS occurs or someone actively does something HILARIOUS this fort has a pretty good chance of going strong.
...to decide to go want to do look more like...
...to decide to go want to do look more like...
Are you suggesting taking the elevation from this iteration and tweaking it?
Not all version upgrades needs a cosmic reset. In this case, all the new features could be chalked up to a couple thousand years of time passing. The dark creatures, mists, and rain could be due to continued unchecked corruption from the foul one and dwarven tech simply could have advanced in the meanwhile as well to explain the rest.
Granted, that is all considering if the story continues along the same meta-plot thread.
Well, considering that Hellcannon takes place meta-plot-wise after the cosmic reset of Failday, it's certainly not unprecedented. It's pretty much up to how we feel when Hellcannon falls that will determine how the story continues.
Well, considering that Hellcannon takes place meta-plot-wise after the cosmic reset of Failday, it's certainly not unprecedented. It's pretty much up to how we feel when Hellcannon falls that will determine how the story continues.
Yeah, true. But Failday had a pretty decent set-up and a good deal of build up. I'm not sure anyone will want to build a massive fractile grave site and set the whole thing to collapse in on itself again... Plus, a magician never does the same trick twice. So if we are going to reset this world, we are going to need something huge... something crazy... and most of all... dorfy.
Well, considering that Hellcannon takes place meta-plot-wise after the cosmic reset of Failday, it's certainly not unprecedented. It's pretty much up to how we feel when Hellcannon falls that will determine how the story continues.
Yeah, true. But Failday had a pretty decent set-up and a good deal of build up. I'm not sure anyone will want to build a massive fractile grave site and set the whole thing to collapse in on itself again... Plus, a magician never does the same trick twice. So if we are going to reset this world, we are going to need something huge... something crazy... and most of all... dorfy.
That has never been a problem for us. Remember, it *is* Catalyst's turn.
<quote pyramid>
No pressure :P
I am not alone in this endeavor - the Overseers who have come before me have left their guidance as well, even if not written on paper blueprints, their designs and ambitions still resonate in these halls. I will see them brought to fruition... Oh my yes. I dare say the very purpose of Hellcannon itself will be fulfilled soon...
Where on earth did we get this menagerie, anyway?Various caravans, whether by barter, theft, or picking up after their horrible massacre.
I am not alone in this endeavor - the Overseers who have come before me have left their guidance as well, even if not written on paper blueprints, their designs and ambitions still resonate in these halls. I will see them brought to fruition... Oh my yes. I dare say the very purpose of Hellcannon itself will be fulfilled soon...
Uh-oh, I think he means to finish your Checkerboard, Mego.
Work is continuing on the great Project quite nicely, and though I have managed to locate this "Checkerboard" my predecessors spoke of, I cannot fathom its use. I have already devised my own system, which grows nearer and nearer to readiness - we will see if the Checkerboard can be integrated someday - perhaps the combined result will be even greater than either Mego or I imagined.
Work is continuing on the great Project quite nicely, and though I have managed to locate this "Checkerboard" my predecessors spoke of, I cannot fathom its use. I have already devised my own system, which grows nearer and nearer to readiness - we will see if the Checkerboard can be integrated someday - perhaps the combined result will be even greater than either Mego or I imagined.
Well this can't be good...
Work is continuing on the great Project quite nicely, and though I have managed to locate this "Checkerboard" my predecessors spoke of, I cannot fathom its use. I have already devised my own system, which grows nearer and nearer to readiness - we will see if the Checkerboard can be integrated someday - perhaps the combined result will be even greater than either Mego or I imagined.
Well this can't be good...
I predict spectacular failure.
all according to plan...
- He's modifying something that was incorrectly made and he doesn't understand into some new obscenity of engineering.I choked on my tea.
Oh, if it was incorrectly made, that explains why it didn't look like anything that would work, to me. Mystery solved.
Not that that means I shouldn't still try to use it...
Oh, if it was incorrectly made, that explains why it didn't look like anything that would work, to me. Mystery solved.
Not that that means I shouldn't still try to use it...
Well you know where the instructions are if you want to know how to build a working checkerboard
Oh, if it was incorrectly made, that explains why it didn't look like anything that would work, to me. Mystery solved.
Not that that means I shouldn't still try to use it...
Well you know where the instructions are if you want to know how to build a working checkerboard
- He's modifying something that was incorrectly made and he doesn't understand into some new obscenity of engineering.I choked on my tea.
Those are both truer than you know.
I'll give you all a real serious update tonight, or resign the fort to someone better equipped to run it - Actually, given where Catalyst is right now, I might have to resign anyway due to a critical existence failure!
Update coming in a matter of hours.
That poor bastard doesn't stand a chance...
Is my Dwarf still alive?
He meddled with one of my engineering creations and paid the price. All as I planned...
Is my Dwarf still alive?
What's your dwarf's name?
Either Tasrak, or failing that, my username. And if it is my username rename him.
Why Aussie, dear Aussie.
The aquifer's just in the way, it has no bearing on the real project.
I'm building the Hellcannon, of course.
Why Aussie, dear Aussie.
The aquifer's just in the way, it has no bearing on the real project.
I'm building the Hellcannon, of course.
Oh, of course. But do you know how to rig it so you can safely weaponize the Clown Car into a one-time surface-clearing wave of death?
Of course, it's also possible i have no idea what I am doing, am wrong about basic principles, and it will simply kill us all.
The second? I wonder how the first one died.Skoxes: http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3154193#msg3154193
The second? I wonder how the first one died.
Are the clowns in league with the Foul One?
Wilddeath. It figures. My Dwarf was stupid enough to go outside.
The second? I wonder how the first one died.
Are the clowns in league with the Foul One?
Wilddeath. It figures. My Dwarf was stupid enough to go outside.
Hey, I'm not foul!
The second? I wonder how the first one died.
Are the clowns in league with the Foul One?
Wilddeath. It figures. My Dwarf was stupid enough to go outside.
Hey, I'm not foul!
The other Foul One. Or is Aussie really the Foul One in mortal form?
The second? I wonder how the first one died.
Are the clowns in league with the Foul One?
Wilddeath. It figures. My Dwarf was stupid enough to go outside.
Hey, I'm not foul!
The other Foul One. Or is Aussie really the Foul One in mortal form?
Aussie just slipped.
Either that or he's something worse than the Foul One, wanting us to believe that he is the Foul One.
Your design is interesting, but flawed; You need a means to fully contain the demons within your HellCannon, or they'll just get bored of being contained and go back down to Hell.
Your design is interesting, but flawed; You need a means to fully contain the demons within your HellCannon, or they'll just get bored of being contained and go back down to Hell.
That is planned - there will be a gate to keep them in the collection chamber once I am finished hollowing it out.
I just finished reading battlefailed, failcannon and skimmed this one. Can I humbly request to get a dorf? If so give it my username, custom profession Renegade, real job military, but please don't sign me up for a turn, I have quite literally no skill at these sort of forts
And I betwe are going to forget how to operate it in a few turnssome jackass, probably the next guy (no offense), is going to remove all the levers and documentation for operating it and relocate bits and pieces in random order to the levercontrolclusterfuck room without notes and rendering the entire thing inoperable, not to mention making it impossible to run the fort.
I shall regroup with booze and tacos for a fresh assault.
but please don't sign me up for a turn, I have quite literally no skill at these sort of fortsThat's exactly why you SHOULD sign up for a turn.
nonono, what I mean is I'm quite horrible at any sort of fort and everyone would just end up starving or dehydrating because I have no idea how to do anythingbut please don't sign me up for a turn, I have quite literally no skill at these sort of fortsThat's exactly why you SHOULD sign up for a turn.
EDIT 2: Does anyone know how El Presidente got named (Kar Puwuncobi)? I'm going through all the thread and can't find mention of it, only of his first death.
nonono, what I mean is I'm quite horrible at any sort of fort and everyone would just end up starving or dehydrating because I have no idea how to do anythingbut please don't sign me up for a turn, I have quite literally no skill at these sort of fortsThat's exactly why you SHOULD sign up for a turn.
EDIT 2: Does anyone know how El Presidente got named (Kar Puwuncobi)? I'm going through all the thread and can't find mention of it, only of his first death.
Well, it was during my turn. But for the exact meaning of the name, I'll tell you it's certainly from a DF language, and leave the rest a mystery.
And I did it during the usual bout of dorfing when I started.
I just found out after digging through all language files. Bravo.EDIT 2: Does anyone know how El Presidente got named (Kar Puwuncobi)? I'm going through all the thread and can't find mention of it, only of his first death.
Well, it was during my turn. But for the exact meaning of the name, I'll tell you it's certainly from a DF language, and leave the rest a mystery.
And I did it during the usual bout of dorfing when I started.
I looked it up. And I laughed.
You forgot he'll just get up after the lynching and go about his business, thus making it somewhat hard to toss him into the hellcannon.
Won't that prevent the demons from leaving the cannon when we want them to?
Is ThatAussieDwarf still lurking about the fort? He seems unusually quiet as of late...He is clearly doing some very important and convoluted scheming. As was planned.
It's tempting to me to try to render Hellcannon in an RPG Maker game, but that would be doing Battlefailed a disservice.skelk and skoxen would be like giant rats, forgotten beasts the first boss that always turns into a common mook, goblin raids the the war sequence (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TheWarSequence) and stuzang the final boss (because it kills everyone) but they all are still stupid tough and you only succeed through sheer quantity of dwarves
ThatAussieDwarf has mostly somehow managed to avoid all my plans to have him killed, including dodging all the Skelks when I sent him out on masonry duty. That was actually the first time Catalyst died - when they both went out together to build the Hellcannon mouth. Aussie was fine and went back inside while Catalyst was blinded by the sun.
I had a look at the archive. I have one thing to say:Yeah, all in calibri size 11
ONE THOUSAND PAGES!?!?
It will remove already linked bridges from the list, but only after they are linked by the dwarves.
Generally, when I link levers to a lot of stuff I will add a couple link jobs and then wait until they are done and add more.
Oh dear.
All according to plan...
Oh dear.
All according to plan...
I think we just found ourselves a volunteer.
Oh dear.
All according to plan...
I think we just found ourselves a volunteer.
Oh dear.
All according to plan...
I think we just found ourselves a volunteer.
I also volunteer to fight against the evil bird.Oh dear.
All according to plan...
I think we just found ourselves a volunteer.
Umm, yeah. I just volunteered. Literally the post before Aussie's.
Ya gotta send me in, coach!
Looks like we are in for some Fun.I also volunteer to fight against the evil bird.Oh dear.As do i, if i still live. But i want a crossbow and a spear. Love my spears.
All according to plan...
I think we just found ourselves a volunteer.
Umm, yeah. I just volunteered. Literally the post before Aussie's.
Ya gotta send me in, coach!
Looks like we are in for some Fun.And there, we all got caught in TAD's plan. Now he has his cannon fodder where he wants, and will escape. Because he always escapes.I also volunteer to fight against the evil bird.Oh dear.
All according to plan...
I think we just found ourselves a volunteer.
Umm, yeah. I just volunteered. Literally the post before Aussie's.
Ya gotta send me in, coach!
Alright, well... You guys (literally) asked for it.
I will post the results of the Battle of the Bird later tonight.
164 pages with the default settings. We are nearing the number of pages Failcannon achieved.Alright, well... You guys (literally) asked for it.
I will post the results of the Battle of the Bird later tonight.
This does not bode well...
EDIT: Holy carp, 50 pages (with 50 posts/page)!
164 pages with the default settings. We are nearing the number of pages Failcannon achieved.Alright, well... You guys (literally) asked for it.
I will post the results of the Battle of the Bird later tonight.
This does not bode well...
EDIT: Holy carp, 50 pages (with 50 posts/page)!
I probably ensured it's survival by mentioning that, since if the fort falls we'll be able to make a fort in the DF 0.34.X .164 pages with the default settings. We are nearing the number of pages Failcannon achieved.Alright, well... You guys (literally) asked for it.
I will post the results of the Battle of the Bird later tonight.
This does not bode well...
EDIT: Holy carp, 50 pages (with 50 posts/page)!
Don't jynx the fort! It could turn out that the hummingbird kills us all now.
I probably ensured it's survival by mentioning that, since if the fort falls we'll be able to make a fort in the DF 0.34.X .164 pages with the default settings. We are nearing the number of pages Failcannon achieved.Alright, well... You guys (literally) asked for it.
I will post the results of the Battle of the Bird later tonight.
This does not bode well...
EDIT: Holy carp, 50 pages (with 50 posts/page)!
Don't jynx the fort! It could turn out that the hummingbird kills us all now.
No, Murphy's Law dictates that Hellcannon will, in fact, survive! Somehow, I had logic to back that up, but in the space of typing that first sentence, I've forgotten what it was. Oh well.Well, Murphy's law is "everything that can go wrong, will go wrong." So if we were to define what "go wrong" is: Something "going wrong" is when something happens that is the opposite of what people want. "What people want" is for Hellcannon to go out spectacularly. The remaining domain for "going wrong" would be the fort living or suffering an unspectacular death. Since giant three-eyed hummingbird deathbeasts fall firmly into the category of spectacular, it isn't currently possible for the fort to die an unspectacular death. This means in order to "go wrong" the fort must live.
I shall be the first to fall! On the blood of my many past lives, this I swear!
In order to "go wrong" the fort must live.
No, Murphy's Law dictates that Hellcannon will, in fact, survive! Somehow, I had logic to back that up, but in the space of typing that first sentence, I've forgotten what it was. Oh well.Well, Murphy's law is "everything that can go wrong, will go wrong." So if we were to define what "go wrong" is: Something "going wrong" is when something happens that is the opposite of what people want. "What people want" is for Hellcannon to go out spectacularly. The remaining domain for "going wrong" would be the fort living or suffering an unspectacular death. Since giant three-eyed hummingbird deathbeasts fall firmly into the category of spectacular, it isn't currently possible for the fort to die an unspectacular death. This means in order to "go wrong" the fort must live.
I shall be the first to fall! On the blood of my many past lives, this I swear!
No, Murphy's Law dictates that Hellcannon will, in fact, survive! Somehow, I had logic to back that up, but in the space of typing that first sentence, I've forgotten what it was. Oh well.Well, Murphy's law is "everything that can go wrong, will go wrong." So if we were to define what "go wrong" is: Something "going wrong" is when something happens that is the opposite of what people want. "What people want" is for Hellcannon to go out spectacularly. The remaining domain for "going wrong" would be the fort living or suffering an unspectacular death. Since giant three-eyed hummingbird deathbeasts fall firmly into the category of spectacular, it isn't currently possible for the fort to die an unspectacular death. This means in order to "go wrong" the fort must live.
I shall be the first to fall! On the blood of my many past lives, this I swear!
Also, sorry Eric Blank. Finally had to give up your awesome quote in my sig.
Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo-h well.
At least I've noted one other quote of mine in someone's signature. Not that I ever say much worth listening to.
Well I did replace it with a rapsheet of all the crimes I've comitted against physics and sapient creatures in DF.
Well I did replace it with a rapsheet of all the crimes I've comitted against physics and sapient creatures in DF.
Nothing could ever be more dwarven than a rapsheet involving everything else that is dwarven reformed into a hideous crime against all known laws of science and nature!
And if there be another installment of the Battlefailed variety, it may as well be on the coasts of the Blueness of Malodors once again. The evil, so horribly evil coasts...
Well I did replace it with a rapsheet of all the crimes I've comitted against physics and sapient creatures in DF.
Nothing could ever be more dwarven than a rapsheet involving everything else that is dwarven reformed into a hideous crime against all known laws of science and nature!
And if there be another installment of the Battlefailed variety, it may as well be on the coasts of the Blueness of Malodors once again. The evil, so horribly evil coasts...
This time with husks and perma-rezing zombies!
Actually, El Presidente isn't a zombie. It happens that he just cannot be bothered by the fact that he should be dead, like, 42 times, and he simply gets back up again and simply walks away.Well I did replace it with a rapsheet of all the crimes I've comitted against physics and sapient creatures in DF.
Nothing could ever be more dwarven than a rapsheet involving everything else that is dwarven reformed into a hideous crime against all known laws of science and nature!
And if there be another installment of the Battlefailed variety, it may as well be on the coasts of the Blueness of Malodors once again. The evil, so horribly evil coasts...
This time with husks and perma-rezing zombies!
*Cough*El Presidante*Cough*
No, Murphy's Law dictates that Hellcannon will, in fact, survive! Somehow, I had logic to back that up, but in the space of typing that first sentence, I've forgotten what it was. Oh well.Well, Murphy's law is "everything that can go wrong, will go wrong." So if we were to define what "go wrong" is: Something "going wrong" is when something happens that is the opposite of what people want. "What people want" is for Hellcannon to go out spectacularly. The remaining domain for "going wrong" would be the fort living or suffering an unspectacular death. Since giant three-eyed hummingbird deathbeasts fall firmly into the category of spectacular, it isn't currently possible for the fort to die an unspectacular death. This means in order to "go wrong" the fort must live.
I shall be the first to fall! On the blood of my many past lives, this I swear!
Yes there are. They're just not available in the biome Hellcannon exists in. Only OCEAN_ARCTIC, which I didn't know was a valid tag.Really? I thought they were added in 0.34.01. Good to know.
Yes there are. They're just not available in the biome Hellcannon exists in. Only OCEAN_ARCTIC, which I didn't know was a valid tag.Really? I thought they were added in 0.34.01. Good to know.
The bird killed RL catalyst, it seems : /
The bird killed RL catalyst, it seems : /
Sorry! I've been on the road and I expected the game would run on my laptop - it runs DF okay most of the time - but it just hasn't been working out with Hellcannon.
Spoiler: I assure you, everything is fine... (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: I assure you, everything is fine... (click to show/hide)
Oh my god... You actually got some stockpiles sorted out? Kudos to you, Catalyst!
Can we get his title changed to "Glorious El Presidente'"?
I take Gizogin and I survived the whole incident.
Still, El Presidente Glorioso deserves to be added to the badass entry in the tvtropes page. Going to do that now.
I take Gizogin and I survived the whole incident.
Still, El Presidente Glorioso deserves to be added to the badass entry in the tvtropes page. Going to do that now.
You both did, yes. Gizogin actually later had to put down the moody DevilEd. You... I think you may be unable to walk? At least I HOPE you have a good excuse for never showing. I should check this.
That's what TAD wants you to think!
Also, I think the numbering for my guy is wrong.
That's what TAD wants you to think!
Also, I think the numbering for my guy is wrong.
All I know is TAD got the hell out of there the moment trouble started. Smart dwarf, really.
That's what TAD wants you to think!
Also, I think the numbering for my guy is wrong.
All I know is TAD got the hell out of there the moment trouble started. Smart dwarf, really.
Actually, he came downstairs with the others to the rally point - or so it seemed. I gave the order to attack and he just kept on walking - right back up the stairs elsewhere on to some other task, evidently. Tricky bugger.
That's what TAD wants you to think!
Also, I think the numbering for my guy is wrong.
All I know is TAD got the hell out of there the moment trouble started. Smart dwarf, really.
Actually, he came downstairs with the others to the rally point - or so it seemed. I gave the order to attack and he just kept on walking - right back up the stairs elsewhere on to some other task, evidently. Tricky bugger.
You never hear me... I guess it has something to be with the fact that I'm dead.
You never hear me... I guess it has something to be with the fact that I'm dead.
That never stopped anyone in Hellcannon before.
You never hear me... I guess it has something to be with the fact that I'm dead.
That never stopped anyone in Hellcannon before.
Speaking of, where's Andreus?
Deathsword, as far as I can tell, (probably due to her "poor focus" in combination with being "absolutely inexhaustible" -- or maybe because she's "not" a goblin spy) has been too preoccupied trying to fill the work order for more rock blocks (they actually ran out) to respond in a timely fashion to the summons to battle.
Erica, Head Stoneworker, has been redorfed. This would be IV - yes?
Seems somehow fitting that HellCannon will fail because it's titular weapon doesn't work. Seems familiar, somehow...
Seems somehow fitting that HellCannon will fail because it's titular weapon doesn't work. Seems familiar, somehow...
I seriously cannot tell you how many times I checked those exact bridges and linkages.
The worst part is the OTHER bridge actually WAS connected and closed properly - but I decided to leave it in the other position instead so the bait chambers could still potentially be loaded.
Anyway, if there was leakage into the magma sea area all along, then that's the real problem - not the incomplete cannon containment.
I feel like I had a hand in the coming downfall of the fortress, for suggesting the name, suggesting the construction of the titular weapon, and trying to make the first step in doing so (and failing horribly).
I also feel like that hand actually belongs to Aussie.
Also, arcangelsd, good fucking luck.
I feel like I had a hand in the coming downfall of the fortress, for suggesting the name, suggesting the construction of the titular weapon, and trying to make the first step in doing so (and failing horribly).
I also feel like that hand actually belongs to Aussie.
Also, arcangelsd, good fucking luck.
Indeed.
When I first started, and saw the fort in such depressingly stable state, I made a decision. Do something spectacular - whether it was a spectacular success or spectacular failure mattered little - the important thing was that it be completely, utterly insane.
I'd say I succeeded at that, at least.
I feel like I had a hand in the coming downfall of the fortress, for suggesting the name, suggesting the construction of the titular weapon, and trying to make the first step in doing so (and failing horribly).
I also feel like that hand actually belongs to Aussie.
I propose HellCannon. Of course, to live up to the name, Aussie will have to take a turn.
Only if I get to open the way to hell, AND with a Checkerboard
@Aussie: You can be one of the starting seven, if you please.
That region's far to happy and peaceful. It sounds like a pleasant childhood story would take place there, not a fortress of unimaginable dwarven torment and horrorI'll look at finding a more horrifying site, then.
I propose HellCannon. Of course, to live up to the name, Aussie will have to take a turn.
Only if I get to open the way to hell, AND with a Checkerboard@Aussie: You can be one of the starting seven, if you please.That region's far to happy and peaceful. It sounds like a pleasant childhood story would take place there, not a fortress of unimaginable dwarven torment and horrorI'll look at finding a more horrifying site, then.
ALL.
AS.
PLANNED!
Edit: Mego - I love the giant "OH FUCK" next to my name in the turn list.
Edit: Mego - I love the giant "OH FUCK" next to my name in the turn list.
I probably won't ever change that. I'm debating whether the rest of your turn should get linked there. Currently leaning towards "no", simply because of the sheer awesomeness that happened in your last update. Nothing else can compare.
EDIT: Made it a bit bigger. Don't you dare bring up Freud.
For future reference, forge level can be accessed by FBs from the volcano. Someone should do something about it.
What. What. WHAT
What I have done to you guys xDDDDDD
Well, I inherited the exact same situation in FailCannon, so I think I could damage control this one too.
If we conquered hell in this condition, it would definitely be worth being in the Hall of Legends. As it stands, it's not a very original idea.Which is exactly why we need to conquer hell in this condition.
Wow guys, I go to sleep and you open hell.
Should we survive this we may want to go to the Hall of Legends and nominate the fort.
What about something like 1 2 3 4 OH FUCKEdit: Mego - I love the giant "OH FUCK" next to my name in the turn list.
I probably won't ever change that. I'm debating whether the rest of your turn should get linked there. Currently leaning towards "no", simply because of the sheer awesomeness that happened in your last update. Nothing else can compare.
EDIT: Made it a bit bigger. Don't you dare bring up Freud.
It was all leading up to that anyway. I would request a smaller, parenthetical link to the beginning afterward, like so: (starts here) For all the meandering nothing posts, there IS backstory on the cannon's construction at least.
I'm only on IV? Clearly you people need to sacrifice more babies.
Here's the other posts from Catalyst's turn:
23. CatalystParadox - 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3246508#msg3246508) 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3252178#msg3252178) 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3254599#msg3254599) 4 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3263536#msg3263536) 5 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3270064#msg3270064) 6 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3277494#msg3277494) 7 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3279819#msg3279819) 8 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3298320#msg3298320) 9 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3306033#msg3306033) 10 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3335443#msg3335443) OH FUCK (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3337646#msg3337646)
It'd feel pretty disjointed for anyone new coming into the thread, though, and not knowing what the Hellcannon was.Here's the other posts from Catalyst's turn:
23. CatalystParadox - 1 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3246508#msg3246508) 2 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3252178#msg3252178) 3 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3254599#msg3254599) 4 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3263536#msg3263536) 5 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3270064#msg3270064) 6 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3277494#msg3277494) 7 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3279819#msg3279819) 8 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3298320#msg3298320) 9 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3306033#msg3306033) 10 (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3335443#msg3335443) OH FUCK (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3337646#msg3337646)
Only one of those actually matter.
Has arcangelsd picked up the save?Yep.
I'd like to propose that we send Presidente Kar against the demons.Sounds good to me. After all, what good is an immortal if you don't put their name to the test?
So send El Glorioso Presidente to clear the surface. You set up a road with walls protecting it all the way to the map edge and call it a day forevermore.Then he becomes very unhappy due to extended time in the military, goes berserk and kills everyone. And everyone lived happily ever after.
So send El Glorioso Presidente to clear the surface. You set up a road with walls protecting it all the way to the map edge and call it a day forevermore.Then he becomes very unhappy due to extended time in the military, goes berserk and kills everyone. And everyone lived happily ever after.
So send El Glorioso Presidente to clear the surface. You set up a road with walls protecting it all the way to the map edge and call it a day forevermore.Then he becomes very unhappy due to extended time in the military, goes berserk and kills everyone. And everyone lived happily ever after.
So we train him. We take our immortal and put him through hell till he's utterly amoral and night-indestructable. Then we turn him loose on the world at large.
You've got it backwards. We play the game because we are twisted and psychopathic, not the other way around.
You've got it backwards. We play the game because we are twisted and psychopathic, not the other way around.
Quite you. You made me laugh while I was sewing puppies into slippers. Those little buggers fidget enough as-is.
We should set up a one-dwarf training gym just for our glorious president. Make him pump, dodge and be emotionally crippled until he doesn't even care that he can single-handedly kill anything he lays eyes on.
Yea, I got the save. But I don't have a lot of spare time lately, so I'm still in the "What the hell I'm looking at" phase. I mean, I'm still overseeing the maze that is hellcannon in order to see how much I can salvage of it.
Yea, I got the save. But I don't have a lot of spare time lately, so I'm still in the "What the hell I'm looking at" phase. I mean, I'm still overseeing the maze that is hellcannon in order to see how much I can salvage of it.
This sounds... interesting. Did Hellcannon ever reach the level of insanity of the previous two forts in layout? Granted I was surprised when Failcannon became as convoluted as it did. I mean Battlefailed had the excuse of forming an upper fort and then later retreating further underground. Failcannon had no excuse for being as crazy as it was... except for "plain and simple" madness.
but wait I'm confused, did I get redorfed and immediately killed afterwards, or was that the story of my first dwarf getting killed again?
Yea, I got the save. But I don't have a lot of spare time lately, so I'm still in the "What the hell I'm looking at" phase. I mean, I'm still overseeing the maze that is hellcannon in order to see how much I can salvage of it.
This sounds... interesting. Did Hellcannon ever reach the level of insanity of the previous two forts in layout? Granted I was surprised when Failcannon became as convoluted as it did. I mean Battlefailed had the excuse of forming an upper fort and then later retreating further underground. Failcannon had no excuse for being as crazy as it was... except for "plain and simple" madness.
Quick question, does El Presidente have any relationships (family or otherwise) with other living dwarves? A tantrum spiral after opening the HFS because we sent an immortal to Hell would not be ideal.
...This may be one of theFTFYmost terriblebest ideas I've ever suggested for a community fortress...
If anything I found Hellcannon more convoluted than Failcannon. Lots of large areas that had been blocked off so you had to ignore them in tracing navigation... lots of stairs going up then down then up then down again just to get from one place to another. And overall just more spread out across levels. Failcannon was crazy, but it was a brand of crazy that eventually made a kind of sense to me. Hellcannon, not so much.Failcannon doesn't make sense, it drives long-time viewers insane to such a degree that they understand it. It's a memetic effect and all three forts could probably qualify as SCPs.
Though that may be a saving grace with the clowns. They seem to hesitate a lot before deciding where they are going.I seem to remember a bunch of Forgotten Beasts had pathing trouble in Failcannon too.
Demon 1: Which way leads out!?
Demon 2: Um, the exit seems to be in a state of flux.
Demon 1: How... how is that even possible? We finally escape hell to end up in this labyrinth of tunnels will our torment never end?
Demon 1: Which way leads out!?
Demon 2: Um, the exit seems to be in a state of flux.
Demon 1: How... how is that even possible? We finally escape hell to end up in this labyrinth of tunnels will our torment never end?
And then they go back to Hell because it's nicer there. I hear they even have strawberries now.
What if we locked our glorious president in a private waterfall-filled bedroom made of gold and his favourite metals while systematically killing off his friends and loved ones in a series of 'accidents'? It should render him uncaring about anything while remaining utterly ecstatic.THIS is truly the greatest, most dwarfy thought EVER!!!
...This may be one of the most terrible ideas I've ever suggested for a community fortress... :-\
Aaaaaaaaaaaand now something horrible is going to happen to balance out this "good luck"
I have only another wall to be finished, and the crisis will be averted. Casualties: 0
Yet.
Crisis averted. Salvaged all the fortress save the magma forges and the panic room. This is incredibly ironic.
Aaaaaaaaaaaand now something horrible is going to happen to balance out this "good luck"
I have only another wall to be finished, and the crisis will be averted. Casualties: 0
Yet.
Crisis averted. Salvaged all the fortress save the magma forges and the panic room. This is incredibly ironic.
Aaaaaaaaaaaand now something horrible is going to happen to balance out this "good luck"
I have only another wall to be finished, and the crisis will be averted. Casualties: 0
Yet.
Crisis averted. Salvaged all the fortress save the magma forges and the panic room. This is incredibly ironic.
That's not how Hellcannon works - One overseer will fix the potentially cataclysmic disaster instigated by the previous overseer and then the one after them will undo their hard work while starting a new project.
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.
Wait a minute...Yeah, they caught up to her. Poor thing.Yup. She, I think. At the bottom of the magma pipe. The clowns will probably kill her.And, for some reason, the blind cave ogre name in the (u)nits list is flashing red and yellow VERY fast. I'm disturbed.Wasn't he permanently on fire?
...Crisis averted. Salvaged all the fortress save the magma forges and the panic room. This is incredibly ironic.
SWEET ARMOK WE'RE DOOMED.*There is an undead cave ogre on fire in the magma that is somehow not dead-dead.He dropped in while the First Battle of Hellcannon was winding down, during my turn. He's just been down there, on fire, ever since. He's like our good-luck charm, so long as that Skeletal Blind Cave Ogre is happily sitting at the bottom of the magma sea Hellcannon cannot fall :P
Uh-oh...SWEET ARMOK WE'RE DOOMED.*There is an undead cave ogre on fire in the magma that is somehow not dead-dead.He dropped in while the First Battle of Hellcannon was winding down, during my turn. He's just been down there, on fire, ever since. He's like our good-luck charm, so long as that Skeletal Blind Cave Ogre is happily sitting at the bottom of the magma sea Hellcannon cannot fall :P
Eric, did the clowns move in your saved game? Because... in mine, they are only enjoying a magma bath : /
Yeah, they caught up to her. Poor thing.
On the other hand, our local wilddeath is killing some trolls. Normal stuff there.
I have only another wall to be finished, and the crisis will be averted. Casualties: 0
Yet.
Ironically, the mechanism-operated door that leads to the panic room makes me unable to finish that damn last wall. Now the clowns are in the forges. Pray to Armok, people.
Crisis averted. Salvaged all the fortress save the magma forges and the panic room. This is incredibly ironic.
I posted the short version, due to time constraints. I had to get back at my beloved fotovoltaic cells : ) Maybe tomorrow, you'll get the long version, and realize how horribly lucky I was xDDDEric, did the clowns move in your saved game? Because... in mine, they are only enjoying a magma bath : /
Yeah, they caught up to her. Poor thing.
On the other hand, our local wilddeath is killing some trolls. Normal stuff there.
I have only another wall to be finished, and the crisis will be averted. Casualties: 0
Yet.
Ironically, the mechanism-operated door that leads to the panic room makes me unable to finish that damn last wall. Now the clowns are in the forges. Pray to Armok, people.
Crisis averted. Salvaged all the fortress save the magma forges and the panic room. This is incredibly ironic.
That's horribly anticlimactic ...
Somehow, despite the setbacks, you must find a weaponize the clowns and raze half the fort at the same time :-)
(and think of it this way, Hellcannon still gets migrants. The same can't be said for other forts that breached hell).
TAD "died" at the end of Catalyst's turn, I think. Still, you do have an immortal dwarf running about.
I'm pretty positive of having seen a TAD carrying something to a bin when I was building the walls.
when I was building the walls.
the walls.
We have wildfires blazing in the magma forges, and in the second and third caverns. All our refined metal is now part of a nice melted collage on the floor. We have lost the previously said forges, and our panic room with some valuable supplies. We are at 18 dwarves, four of them children, and one of the able-bodied ones just died of thirst. The only dwarf with military skills is currently running up and down the stairs, half naked and wielding a pick, and on the verge of snapping. I somehow can't find TAD, and a metric fuckton of kittens are born each day. The demons are killing everything up to the second cavern level. Our main entrance is by now the place of a giant melee between trolls and our beloved wilddeath, and dwarves keep running off to store bloodied rags on bins that are 400 miles away from their position.
I mean, I can swear seeing one TAD running around in the units list, and in the fortress. I swear it, I'm not making this up.
It must have been a trick of the mind. I'm pretty positive of having seen a TAD carrying something to a bin when I was building the walls.
I guess we now know what really happened at The Master's turn to cause a zero-dwarf fort.
we'll do what any normal DF player would do, we'll figure out how to weaponize it and use it to kill elves
we'll do what any normal DF player would do, we'll figure out how to weaponize it and use it to kill elves
Awesome. Though it could use a minor note hinting as to it STILL being all part of TAD's master plan, whatever that might be.
Awesome. Though it could use a minor note hinting as to it STILL being all part of TAD's master plan, whatever that might be.
Done.
Does it involve dumping magma on them? :DWe need something better, magma has been overused. We have plenty of syndrome-bearing demons right under our feet.
Does it involve dumping magma on them? :DWe need something better, magma has been overused. We have plenty of syndrome-bearing demons right under our feet.
EDIT: Mego, that is going into the archive. Might even make it the epilogue once this ends.
Does it involve dumping magma on them? :DWe need something better, magma has been overused. We have plenty of syndrome-bearing demons right under our feet.
EDIT: Mego, that is going into the archive. Might even make it the epilogue once this ends.
It's a shame that Catalyst already tapped the HFS - I actually have an idea for a Clown Car trap that I've been itching to try out.
Are they still generally heading upwards? It might yet be possible to contain them all (or at least most of them) if so.Most of them are at the top of the empty magma chimney, which for some reason has a bigass floor only sustained on a single pillar. I keep wishing for one of the buggers to destroy the pillar, and drop the entire buiding on them. Sadly, I haven't had any luck for now.
That pillar is connected to a lever in the Hall of Spite. AKA bigass room of levers everyone is rightfully scared of.
Just a tip.
Pull all levers! All of them!Time to pull all of them. It can only get funnier anyways, why not speeding the proccess?
That pillar is connected to a lever in the Hall of Spite. AKA bigass room of levers everyone is rightfully scared of.
Just a tip.Pull all levers! All of them!Time to pull all of them. It can only get funnier anyways, why not speeding the proccess?
Hell, now I'm in the mood of pulling some schrödinger's levers. I'll post the results tonight. (FYI, where I live is 18:39)
Yes, they now "control" the third and second cavern floors, the magma forges , the panic room and nearly everything in between.
I have a plan to trap some of them, if somebody wants to have some demon pets. Actually I think two of them ARE isolated, but in a rather large area.
Yes, I did. And the magma forges are connected to the third cavern level, and then are connected to the second cavern level via an empty volcano chimney. I didn't even attempt to floor over the forges : /Yes, they now "control" the third and second cavern floors, the magma forges , the panic room and nearly everything in between.
I have a plan to trap some of them, if somebody wants to have some demon pets. Actually I think two of them ARE isolated, but in a rather large area.
Strange, I had no such problems short of being incapable of flooring over the magma forges in time. Did you make sure to cancel dwarves' jobs and disable all other labors judiciously when designating walls?
Maybe the correct combination of lever pulls will pour magma over the clowns and obsidianize them :-).No. That honour goes to Ineverrememberhisname, formerly known as seanhl.
(incidently, did I ever get dorf'ed?)
EDIT: Mego, that is going into the archive. Might even make it the epilogue once this ends.
That pillar is connected to a lever in the Hall of Spite. AKA bigass room of levers everyone is rightfully scared of.
Just a tip.Pull all levers! All of them!Time to pull all of them. It can only get funnier anyways, why not speeding the proccess?
Hell, now I'm in the mood of pulling some schrödinger's levers. I'll post the results tonight. (FYI, where I live is 18:39)
I had a better (bastard-er) idea. I will wait until the end of my turn, then pull ALL the levers and leave to the next poor bastard the task of sorting it out.EDIT: Mego, that is going into the archive. Might even make it the epilogue once this ends.That pillar is connected to a lever in the Hall of Spite. AKA bigass room of levers everyone is rightfully scared of.
Just a tip.Pull all levers! All of them!Time to pull all of them. It can only get funnier anyways, why not speeding the proccess?
Hell, now I'm in the mood of pulling some schrödinger's levers. I'll post the results tonight. (FYI, where I live is 18:39)
Looks like it won't be long now.
I had a better (bastard-er) idea. I will wait until the end of my turn, then pull ALL the levers and leave to the next poor bastard the task of sorting it out.EDIT: Mego, that is going into the archive. Might even make it the epilogue once this ends.That pillar is connected to a lever in the Hall of Spite. AKA bigass room of levers everyone is rightfully scared of.
Just a tip.Pull all levers! All of them!Time to pull all of them. It can only get funnier anyways, why not speeding the proccess?
Hell, now I'm in the mood of pulling some schrödinger's levers. I'll post the results tonight. (FYI, where I live is 18:39)
Looks like it won't be long now.
It will be my testament to this fortress.
<snip>
That will be great! It will totally suck for whoever is next.
I'm fairly certain pulling all the levers would do nothing to the fortress that hasn't already happened. Sure, you might get some lava spillage, maybe a few collapsed ceilings and spikes shooting out of the floor, but I doubt it'll be any worse than the demons and general insanity already running rampant.You may be right; given the actual state of the fortress, a little more chaos may go unnoticed. Change of plan: I'll add some levers of my own, THEN pull all of them.
I sailed from my vessel, and went to the magma forges. Well, the ex-magma forges, now “demon party hall”. Did I mention that it’s completely in fire? I had no idea that lead could catch fire.
I sailed from my vessel, and went to the magma forges. Well, the ex-magma forges, now “demon party hall”. Did I mention that it’s completely in fire? I had no idea that lead could catch fire.
So, we have a room full of flaming lead, magma, and demons?
... Now all that remains is to kill elves with it.
Oh, I can rig that. The problem is how to make a counter that can get that high
Use magma. If a cistern contains 500 units of magma, you just need a system that lets it overlfow at that exact point, burns down a support holding something up, leading to a series of catastrophic events that destroy the world.
Use magma. If a cistern contains 500 units of magma, you just need a system that lets it overlfow at that exact point, burns down a support holding something up, leading to a series of catastrophic events that destroy the world.
So, I've come up with a plan.
Step 1: Lure all demons out of Hell.
Step 2: Isolate demons so they can't go back to Hell.
Step 3: Move fort to Hell.
Step 4: ???
Step 5: Profit.
At this point we ask the question. Do we continue to hold the handbrake and try and stop our decent down the hill of madness. Or do with let go, put the pedal to the metal and ride death and disaster down to hell.
At this point we ask the question. Do we continue to hold the handbrake and try and stop our decent down the hill of madness. Or do with let go, put the pedal to the metal and ride death and disaster down to hell.
There's a handbrake on our madness?
At this point we ask the question. Do we continue to hold the handbrake and try and stop our decent down the hill of madness. Or do with let go, put the pedal to the metal and ride death and disaster down to hell.
There's a handbrake on our madness?
I'm just as confused as you are.
I say FULL STEAM AHEAD! We shall blaze a new path to madness, and nothing shall stand in our way! On this day, we stand not as men, not as dwarves, but as vanguards of death itself! And other inspirational stuff.
And then we make every civilization extinct by routinely killing off their caravans.
And then we make every civilization extinct by routinely killing off their caravans.
...Does this mean I just technically caused an Age of Darkness with two bridges and some pressure plates?
Can I request a dwarfing as a pick wielding beekeeper named Neotemplar? Gender does not matter. I'm just starting to read this, having read the previous two and I figured it'd be amusing to see my dwarf bite the dust after 170+ pages :) (Death being the inevitable fact of dwarves.)Beekeepers may be in short supply. Picks probably not.
There I go again. Frankly, when demons are setting lead on fire, do you really think they won't set the shooting gallery on fire too?The disturbing part is that the shooting gallery is a wall with a few fortifications. Still, up in flames it went.
Anyway, if there is a free dwarf I'd like to be redwarfed as "Deathsword - Carnifex" , please.
On other related news, the demons seem to be… retreating further into the places they own now. They all seem to be assembling in the panic room. All of them. I guess the non-euclidean architecture of HellCannon finally took a toll in their sanity and they panicked. I don’t know if this is awesome or horrific.
Especially if you consider that it'll be a ‼rave party‼ in the best ‼party hall‼ in the fort.On other related news, the demons seem to be… retreating further into the places they own now. They all seem to be assembling in the panic room. All of them. I guess the non-euclidean architecture of HellCannon finally took a toll in their sanity and they panicked. I don’t know if this is awesome or horrific.
Nah, they're just assembling in there tosmash furniturethrow an awesome rave party in the best party hall ever concieved of.
It's hard to say how many turns it'll last. Failcannon seemed nearly dead during the loyalty cascade, yet it survived until my rather stable turn when I triggered Failday.Everyone is still alive, save Deathsword. I think my turn is going to let you down. For now, it has been chock-full of anticlimaxes (<- Is that right?)
It really depends more on what the overseer does than anything else.
arcangelsd, could you give us any information on the status of the fort, or, if you haven't played since your last post, when you'll be able to get it going again? Hellcannon doesn't deserve to fall off page 1 while it's still alive.
And how did they get there? :o
Brace thyselves, an anticlimax is coming.I want this in the description of my turn.
Well, here's the pattern:
Battlefailed -> Failcannon -> Hellcannon
To stick with that, the new fortress should be either "Hell-Something" or "Something-Hell" (and really, now that Hell has been breached, I think it's only fitting, too). If we wanna cap off the "series" we could come full circle and call it Battlehell. Otherwise, we can continue the progression and make the "Something" something other than Battle, Fail, or Cannon.
I vote for a name with "Fail" in the title - as I believe THAT has been the unifying theme of the series.
Perhaps Hellfailed.
Kar approached, intercepted them, blocked their fire with a wooden shield, and torn them apart.
Kar approached, intercepted them, blocked their fire with a wooden shield, and torn them apart.
Versus how many exactly? Combat logs plox? Demons are naturally legendary in every skill they'd get the chance to use on you. Kar either died multiple times and popped right back up, or the RNG god not only smiled on him but laughed their ass off, then threw their now-disembodied ass at the demons, striking them in the head, the severed parts sailing off in graceful arcs.
We need a new secondary word. I propose HellBastion. You know what must be done with this fortress.
We need a new secondary word. I propose HellBastion. You know what must be done with this fortress.
If we listen to Aussie, it will surely be our doom!
But, surely he anticipated that, so really not listening will be our doom!
But, surely he also anticipated that, so really listening to him will be our doom after all!
Fuckfuckfuckfuck. (http://wiki.mafiascum.net/index.php?title=WIFOM)
Also, El Presidente's theme song. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=usPqh66pQaA)
And blood-paved streets, also.
In other news, I'm genning a world in Xbox 360 Minecraft with the name "Battlefailed" and the seed "ThatAussieGuy". There is no way this will be anything but epic.
The map is ‼AWESOME‼ Iron and wilddeath (skeletons and zombies) everywhere. Also a TON of creepers. Well, there were a ton of creepers. Now there's some creepers, a bunch of craters, and a stack of gunpowder in my chest.
Sounds like Battlefailed to me.
Hellmaze would sum up the history of this particular succession game pretty well...+1 to that
I like HellBastion pretty well.
Though we could shout out to DF history and make it HellBoat.
Failcannon didn't have an actual cannon, you know. At least Hellcannon has something resembling one.
I approve the Hellboat name.
Failcannon didn't have an actual cannon, you know. At least Hellcannon has something resembling one.
I approve the Hellboat name.
I know. Battlefailed had the Failcannon, which utterly failed. Hellcannon has the Hellcannon, which never really got finished.
You forgot Failday at Failcannon. It worked. In fact, it did more than just smash some coffins.
You forgot Failday at Failcannon. It worked. In fact, it did more than just smash some coffins.
I was talking about us being 0-for-2 on cannons, not us being 3-for-3 on spectacular failures that were actually successes.
Failboat?
And the Hellcannon was SUPPOSED to be finished, but...
Keep in mind, the next fort will probably be in 34.11, unless this one somehow manages to last until the next version (probably 35.01, considering all the major changes Toady is planning to make). So killing the invaders/elves won't be the problem. It will be making them stay dead.And the Hellcannon was SUPPOSED to be finished, but...
...you forgot to take into account just which fortress you built it in.
I could probably build the next fortress a functional cannon of some sort. Or at least something that will keep visitors off the front lawn and in a bloody heap.
Keep in mind, the next fort will probably be in 34.11, unless this one somehow manages to last until the next version (probably 35.01, considering all the major changes Toady is planning to make). So killing the invaders/elves won't be the problem. It will be making them stay dead.And the Hellcannon was SUPPOSED to be finished, but...
...you forgot to take into account just which fortress you built it in.
I could probably build the next fortress a functional cannon of some sort. Or at least something that will keep visitors off the front lawn and in a bloody heap.
I think our biggest problem next fort will be keeping the dead dead. I mean how often does a dwarf die in one of these forts. And how often do they die inside the fort? We'll either need a crematorium or a big pit.
I think our biggest problem next fort will be keeping the dead dead. I mean how often does a dwarf die in one of these forts. And how often do they die inside the fort? We'll either need a crematorium or a big pit.
An average of about one dwarf every three months, barring !!FUN!! You really want a fort that's only on a site with some haunted tiles, rather than the full area if you want to survive longer than a year.
Indeed. We will do whatever it takes to survive in a 100% evil zombyifing embark. Maybe if we store a vampire in a completely sealed area...I think our biggest problem next fort will be keeping the dead dead. I mean how often does a dwarf die in one of these forts. And how often do they die inside the fort? We'll either need a crematorium or a big pit.
An average of about one dwarf every three months, barring !!FUN!! You really want a fort that's only on a site with some haunted tiles, rather than the full area if you want to survive longer than a year.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!
Also arcangelsd, you are not allowed to kill the fort until .35 comes out.
I think our biggest problem next fort will be keeping the dead dead. I mean how often does a dwarf die in one of these forts. And how often do they die inside the fort? We'll either need a crematorium or a big pit.
An average of about one dwarf every three months, barring !!FUN!! You really want a fort that's only on a site with some haunted tiles, rather than the full area if you want to survive longer than a year.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!
Also arcangelsd, you are not allowed to kill the fort until .35 comes out.
Now, back to reading Battlefailed.
My favorite, dropping him into a glowing pit so he can bring death and terror to whatever is down there.
Frankly, if the fort is to ever end we'll need to kill Kar in one way or another. The options I've thought of so far are atom-smashing, being encased in ice, osbisidianizing, and, my favorite, dropping him into a glowing pit so he can bring death and terror to whatever is down there.Well, I, while bored, created an paralel reality, in which he fought another demon with instarot powder, and he died just fine. Also, he did, for some reason, wear an "alder mail shirt" I don't know how did that happen.
Frankly, if the fort is to ever end we'll need to kill Kar in one way or another. The options I've thought of so far are atom-smashing, being encased in ice, osbisidianizing, and, my favorite, dropping him into a glowing pit so he can bring death and terror to whatever is down there.Well, I, while bored, created an paralel reality, in which he fought another demon with instarot powder, and he died just fine. Also, he did, for some reason, wear an "alder mail shirt" I don't know how did that happen.
Parallel realities have a known tendency to be unrealistic.
El Presidente won't just revive because you told him to.Frankly, if the fort is to ever end we'll need to kill Kar in one way or another. The options I've thought of so far are atom-smashing, being encased in ice, osbisidianizing, and, my favorite, dropping him into a glowing pit so he can bring death and terror to whatever is down there.Well, I, while bored, created an paralel reality, in which he fought another demon with instarot powder, and he died just fine. Also, he did, for some reason, wear an "alder mail shirt" I don't know how did that happen.
Parallel realities have a known tendency to be unrealistic.
Would you mind if I sigged this?
Going to use this bump by Dinjoralo to poke a bit at arcangelsd and ask how is the turn going.
Seriously people, we're at page 182, Failcannon had 189 pages. We can't let this thread die before that.
And, of course, I'm not telling you about my secret plans.
We've gone over this already. Even if nobody posts in this thread, it will not die. Just like Hellcannon.I'm tempted to grab the save once arcangelsd finishes his turn to see how fast I can kill the fort.
I'm tempted to grab the save once arcangelsd finishes his turn to see how fast I can kill the fort.Sounds like fun, but don't give the next Overseer too many ideas. If the fort dies, chances are what killed it will be
Going to use this bump by Dinjoralo to poke a bit at arcangelsd and ask how is the turn going.
Seriously people, we're at page 182, Failcannon had 189 pages. We can't let this thread die before that.
It's not going to die. I'm just.. embarassed by the LACK of things happening. FYI, I'm in autumn now, and ANYTHING has happened since last update. Well, if you want to read about dwarves getting boozed up, and me checking the fortress for possible weak points, I'll write about it, gladly.
And, of course, I'm not telling you about my secret plans.
Gentledwarfs! I have an announcement to make. The archive is finally organized. All turns numbered, formatting errors purged, etc. Still have to do a spell-check, but I am uploading the new version now.
Gentledwarfs! I have an announcement to make. The archive is finally organized. All turns numbered, formatting errors purged, etc. Still have to do a spell-check, but I am uploading the new version now.
It's also been a month now since Catalyst Paradox breached Hell; boring or not, details of any kind would be appreciated.How can breaching Hell be boring? I'd have thought stuff like that would kill most normal forts before you can say "Oh shit".
As you said yourself, this is Hellcannon. If 80% of the fort population isn't dyingIt's also been a month now since Catalyst Paradox breached Hell; boring or not, details of any kind would be appreciated.How can breaching Hell be boring? I'd have thought stuff like that would kill most normal forts before you can say "Oh shit".
Also, I edited my Dorf request, it's a bit more lenient, but I'm betting that Arc already got to it. Kinda pointless because, well, this is Hellcannon.
It's also been a month now since Catalyst Paradox breached Hell; boring or not, details of any kind would be appreciated.How can breaching Hell be boring? I'd have thought stuff like that would kill most normal forts before you can say "Oh shit".
I mean, Aussie is on the turn list. He won the game by making Hell his bitch. HE GREW STRAWBERRIES IN HELL! The demons should be the ones that go "OH SHIT" when they accidentally breach Hellcannon.
I mean, Aussie is on the turn list. He won the game by making Hell his bitch. HE GREW STRAWBERRIES IN HELL! The demons should be the ones that go "OH SHIT" when they accidentally breach Hellcannon.
My turn's not for a long time yet. And you forgot the fortress-o'-sacrifice I made.
I mean, Aussie is on the turn list. He won the game by making Hell his bitch. HE GREW STRAWBERRIES IN HELL! The demons should be the ones that go "OH SHIT" when they accidentally breach Hellcannon.
My turn's not for a long time yet. And you forgot the fortress-o'-sacrifice I made.
You're still on the list. It still counts.
I mean, Aussie is on the turn list. He won the game by making Hell his bitch. HE GREW STRAWBERRIES IN HELL! The demons should be the ones that go "OH SHIT" when they accidentally breach Hellcannon.
My turn's not for a long time yet. And you forgot the fortress-o'-sacrifice I made.
You're still on the list. It still counts.
Wait, freakin' strawberries?! Don't you need sunlight for that? And an irrigated plot? Don't tell me you managed to get sunlight and water into Hell. Sweet Armok.
Wait, freakin' strawberries?! Don't you need sunlight for that? And an irrigated plot? Don't tell me you managed to get sunlight and water into Hell. Sweet Armok.
I had looked through the thread before but never read it in it's entirety.QuotePyramid quote.
The link is in his sig. It's also right here. (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=94140.0) I'm not going to tell you where it is in the thread. You'll have to read the entire thing.
I had looked through the thread before but never read it in it's entirety.QuotePyramid quote.
The link is in his sig. It's also right here. (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=94140.0) I'm not going to tell you where it is in the thread. You'll have to read the entire thing.
Also, you just sent me searching for mentions of strawberries and bees in Hell in an 80+ page thread at 1:30am. You're evil. And probably a supervillain.
I had looked through the thread before but never read it in it's entirety.QuotePyramid quote.
The link is in his sig. It's also right here. (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=94140.0) I'm not going to tell you where it is in the thread. You'll have to read the entire thing.
Also, you just sent me searching for mentions of strawberries and bees in Hell in an 80+ page thread at 1:30am. You're evil. And probably a supervillain.
Cats exploding? Fortress flooding? Dwarves thrown into demon pits?
You pulled my levers, didn't you.
Cats exploding? Fortress flooding? Dwarves thrown into demon pits?
You pulled my levers, didn't you.
No, the fun part comes from that I DIDN'T
Yet.
Just a reminder that I too requested a dorfin' back on page 172. But, um, yeah, your point about the migrants is noted. I'm not sure what level of brain damage would be required for someone to want to immigrate to this fine, er, gated community anyway.
Or the equivalent of a dwarven death sentence.
As you said yourself, this is Hellcannon. If 80% of the fort population isn't dyingOh. I'm still used to 50% of the dwarfs dyinghilariouslyhorribly, then it is boring.
As you said yourself, this is Hellcannon. If 80% of the fort population isn't dyingOh. I'm still used to 50% of the dwarfs dyinghilariouslyhorribly, then it is boring.like moronswith dignity.
Also, NEXT fort? NEXT?! There's more?! Awesome~! :D
As you said yourself, this is Hellcannon. If 80% of the fort population isn't dyingOh. I'm still used to 50% of the dwarfs dyinghilariouslyhorribly, then it is boring.like moronswith dignity.
Also, NEXT fort? NEXT?! There's more?! Awesome~! :D
We're big on slapstick comedy here. Shooting ourselves in the foot once? Funny.
Shooting ourselves in the foot three times? Hilarious.
We don't shoot ourselves in the foot! That implies that we have the presence of mind to carry a loaded weapon, which clearly isn't the case. The Battlefailed saga is so dangerous that a weapon would make logical sense, so we obviously must not have one.
No, what we do is much more akin to dipping our collective foot into magma, realizing that it burns horribly, then sticking it back in repeatedly out of spite.
The next guy will get 80% of the population killed through negligence, regardless of and detrimental to the massive improvements you achieved in your time, if my turn is an example. :P
Well, obviously, any turn that something goes right, the next turn the overseer pulls all the levers in the big room marked "DO NOT TOUCH, FOR THE LOVE OF ARMOK!" And thus, Fun happens. Maybe the lever releases all the cats from their cages, maybe they release the Happy Fun Stuff, maybe they just randomly raise or lower all the bridges in the fortress at just the right time to crush Urist McIncrediblyPopular, Urist McManicDeppressive's 14 cats, and the baby of Urist McIncrediblyPowerfulChampion.Or the next player will turn the project of their predecessor into a doomsday device.
Or throwaway the control levers/notes for using some important part of the fortress. Or fill a whole room with levers, none of which are labelled and thus crippling the fortress because all the controls to the gates and such are in there.I actually did that for the gate lever in Failcannon. Then added a trap lever with a note saying it was the gate one. Then Failday happened and my sabotage was turned useless.
You've done all this stuff, and you haven't said anything about how you've done it...I wanted to keep some secrecy, and there wasn't anything interesting happening apart from my constructs. But long story short, I jury-rigged several deathtraps (more) to the Hall of Spite, and I'm planning of setting them off tonight. Sorry, EmeralWind, you'll hate me, once you get some way of getting rid of the water that may or may not be laced with FB secretions.
We don't shoot ourselves in the foot! That implies that we have the presence of mind to carry a loaded weapon, which clearly isn't the case. The Battlefailed saga is so dangerous that a weapon would make logical sense, so we obviously must not have one.
No, what we do is much more akin to dipping our collective foot into magma, realizing that it burns horribly, then sticking it back in repeatedly out of spite.
(You're also alright with exploding children, are you not?)
Actually, I'm not sure about what is going to happen. Hilarity for sure.(You're also alright with exploding children, are you not?)
That's actually disappointing. We expect more from you.
I take that as an insult to our ingenuity at the time of Failcannon's demise.
And I haven't finished preparing the 34.11 world yet! :o
Hey guys Eric is running the next thread.
[abbr=whatever]text[/abbr]You've done all this stuff, and you haven't said anything about how you've done it...I wanted to keep some secrecy, and there wasn't anything interesting happening apart from my constructs. But long story short, I jury-rigged several deathtraps (more) to the Hall of Spite, and I'm planning of setting them off tonight. Sorry, EmeralWind, you'll hate me, once you get some way of getting rid of the water that may or may not be laced with FB secretions.
If FUN should find me before I break, I pray to Armok my soul to take!
I vote to remove/reduce animal-men. Because we need skelks in the next fort, obviously.
As for descriptor shapes: I'd say all characters important to the meta-plot (TAD included) and all overseers.
Prequel? Screw Prequels. Too much effort.
We can definitely reduce the animalman populations to mroe specific conditions, such that they won't show up in a terrifying biome.
And what are THEY
I think... Don't you mean Syrupleaf? Unless there's another THEM that I'm forgetting?
(EDIT: Huh, never thought that'd be what it'd take to make me delurk :\)
But weren't THEY technically introduced in Syrupleaf, which means that in the context of your statementEh, who cares? I certainly don't. Ahem.
I haven't technically been initiated yet. I still must first pass through the 170 Pages Of Madness. (Naturally, I only began reading once everything was already winding down :V)
I'm decently-skilled at modding creatures, if any help is needed. I'm not exactly up to speed on the Fail-Mythos, though.
Totally awesome ideas are alright, I still think though that we should use some stuff of our own rather than steal from someone else. I have no idea about the mythos of this fort series though, because I sort of haven't kept up with it at all. Don't we have enough dead already and violations of time and space to make a hostile civ from it?
The dead from previous forts? Is there even any deity or anything appropriate that'd be interested in raising an army of the dead and assault everything? If so, appropriate course of action would be to give all the dead the ability to raise corpses. Wouldn't even need an evil embark or a tower nearby then to get undead attackers within.
Queen Led would make a fitting deity for the dead. Making a civ out of the overseers from the first three forts that attacks the next fort? Awesome.
Perhaps we could say that, in order to make ourselves perfectly good, we completely banished the evil from ourselves. That evil became our shadow selves, formed a civ, and started wreaking havoc on life, the universe, and everything. Unfortunately, that would require us to actually plan a fort's design so that it looks like a citadel of righteousness instead of a massive, chaotic clusterfuck.
The two problems with making a fort in that secluded island are these: Not an evil region and no sieges. This means there'll be nearly no threats at all. That is undesirable when trying to build another fort-shaped abomination.
Since people were talking about mods earlier... I tend to be a proponent of the fewer, the better in succession forts, so that you don't get weird things happening with inconsistencies in who does or doesn't have certain mods.
Kobolds actually appeared in Failcannon (and then helped kill it), but I guess Hellcannon is too cold for them.
That lake and the one to the north-west of it still exist, although the island in that one is no longer star-shaped and is now more with the secluded area to the south. It actually looks a bitlike Australia
Australia
It actually looks a bit like Australia
It actually looks a bit like Australia
All According To Plan...
It actually looks a bit like Australia
All According To Plan...
... you magnificent BASTARD.
EDIT: Actually, if TAD turned out to be Lur Thiefwitch all along, it would be strangely appropriate.
It actually looks a bit like Australia
All According To Plan...
... you magnificent BASTARD.
EDIT: Actually, if TAD turned out to be Lur Thiefwitch all along, it would be strangely appropriate.Spoiler (click to show/hide)
So did we want to go ahead with introducing the dangerous Australian animals (maybe as TAD's gift to the world?) to Hellcannon or Battlfailed IV?
I'm happy to code em up.
@Reudh:
I... Poisonous trees? Really? O-O
I'm assuming you're typing this from within a hermetically-sealed bunker? If not... WHY NOT? D8
If the massive amount of horrifying things to add is a problem, just pick the worst one, though I guess that's easier said than done :V
@Eric:
I'll poke around with the bone blocks, seeing as how I have absolutely nothing better to do.
It can cause death! A continent! Just by being on it! :P
reaction_boneblock
[OBJECT:REACTION]
[REACTION:MAKE_BONE_BLOCKS]
[NAME:make bone blocks]
[BUILDING:CRAFTSMAN:NONE]
[REAGENT:A:1:NONE:NONE:NONE:NONE]
[USE_BODY_COMPONENT]
[ANY_BONE_MATERIAL]
[PRODUCT:100:8:BLOCKS:NONE:GET_MATERIAL_FROM_REAGENT:A:NONE]
[SKILL:BONECARVE]
You know this means the next fort will have floors literally paved with the dead, right?
You know this means the next fort will have floors literally paved with the dead, right?
Isn't it exciting?
E: Not really important, but by leaving out [ANY_BONE_MATERIAL], I managed to produce solid, construction-able blocks of raw aardvark flesh. Yummy.
Anyway, it's Thursday, so arcangelsd should be telling us all about the exploding kids in a few hours. That might be the weirdest sentence I have ever typed.
I'd think adding new creatures ought to be kept to a minimum, but large herds of man-sized funnelweb spiders plagueing the world would be a nice touch.
Anybody got a reaction that successfully outputs bone blocks? That one form Battlefailed does not, in fact, work.
here is the state of the descriptor shapes file as of present:Spoiler (click to show/hide)
My name’s Arcangelsd, and..
What’s going on down there with those little guys?
OH MY GODS THAT PLATFORM JUST FELL DOWN WITH THOSE CHILDREN STANDING ON IT
Welp, they are mostly all right. They broke a few bones, and are currently lying in a messy pile of flesh that formerly were felines, on the bottom of the first cavern level. I was kinda hoping that they would explode or something. So sad. Wait, what the hell did I just say?
Must help, must seek help…
No, wait. I’m the one who did it. Designed it, or most of it, and put it into motion. It’s coming to my mind now. I remember… everything. I remember the twelfth bay. And why we started those stupid projects, in order to slowly break this fantastic reality.
Of course. Stuzang.
That persistent mother****er keeps trying to hijack those realms. He nearly got it in Battlefailed, but we managed to control him that time. In FailCannon, he got defictionalized.
And in HellCannon, he got real. Dangerously real. I learned it the first time I went, huh, KIA, lacking a better word to express myself.
He was recruiting. US.
I'll keep posting tomorrow. I'm really tired, and there's still a lot to say. I hope that those update will be well received.
And I'm leaving most of the post-event description to EmeralWind. I'm sure he'll appreciate all the content to write about.
I'm downloading the save! NOW!You are aware that is not the final save, correct? It's the pre-pull save. Like the pre-failday one in Failcannon.
I'm downloading the save! NOW!You are aware that is not the final save, correct? It's the pre-pull save. Like the pre-failday one in Failcannon.
I believe arcangelsd meant that that save was actually a bit after (or maybe before) the end of his turn. He designated all the levers to be pulled, and saved right before it, so that EmeraldWind could do the after-action report and take over. Regardless, I think he intended that to be the save that EmeraldWind starts with, so in the OP it goes.Ok, I'm sorry. You misunderstood me. That's the pre-event save, which is unfortunately a mere minute my turn actually ends.
So what if we unleashed hell, ARMOK WILL SAVE US!
So what if we unleashed hell, ARMOK WILL SAVE US!
Armok doesn't seem like the saving type.
He's probably pleased with us though.
So what if we unleashed hell, ARMOK WILL SAVE US!
Whoa, our food stocks seem low. Better start fixing that, Emerald.
Whoa, our food stocks seem low. Better start fixing that, Emerald.
Always focusing on the important bits.
The fortress is flooded in water and magma, demons are running everywhere, but damnit, WE'RE HUNGRY!
Why are all of our proffessions listed in... Spanish? ???
Judging by the "other" section, we have plenty of food for 14 dorfs.
Just lock the doors to flooded areas, that should do the trick.Why are all of our proffessions listed in... Spanish? ???
I think it happened after Kar got his proffession in spanish.
Should The Master be "el Maestro"?
Hellcannon: The Spanish Soap Opera.Nobody expects a spanish
Should The Master be "el Maestro"?
As long as we get "el Médico"
I changed it to Spanish, in the first half of my turn when I wad bored and the idea of pulling the levers just hadn't ocurred to me yet.
Actually, either El Doctor and El Inmortal are proper Spanish. You think I should know, that with being Spaniard and all that, but you can change the names in a whim, as I did xD
I like to see that it was hilariously well recieved. Gratuitous Spanish FTW!!
Hey, emeralWind, haven't you found the demon pit yet? XD
Oh, right, I noticed I seem to have died at some point. I imagine it was a while ago, and I just forgot. Have I been buried, or will my slightly miffed ghost be roaming around at some point?
More Good news. Andreus is alive, but unconscious.Bad news: without a functioning hospital, complete with medical dwarves, that's a death sentence. RIP, Andreus.
He only has a broken elbow as an injury.
More Good news. Andreus is alive, but unconscious.Bad news: without a functioning hospital, complete with medical dwarves, that's a death sentence. RIP, Andreus.
He only has a broken elbow as an injury.
Glorious, EmeraldWind. Absolutely glorious.Definitely one, maybe two. It's hard to tell if they are separate floods or one big one.
I have never seen so much vomit.
E: Am I correct in surmising that this fort has had at least one catastrophic flooding incident? Because that's what it looks like.
Not necessarily. At least it's not an unstaffed or untrained hospital. THOSE are death-sentences.More Good news. Andreus is alive, but unconscious.Bad news: without a functioning hospital, complete with medical dwarves, that's a death sentence. RIP, Andreus.
He only has a broken elbow as an injury.
So Ledi's been training the cats into an army of disposable warbeasts? Why did no-one think of this sooner?!
The only boon seems to be that breathing fire isn't that bad of attack. Andreus never seemed to take damage from the flames.
That hole in the defenses you mentioned? The one near the water reactor? I'm pretty sure that was my fault. Sorry about that.
The cats are having their revenge for years of mass kitten slaughter. This is clearly a sign of the end of the world.
::) Yeaaaahhh, about that... the cats weren't getting much revenge, unless you count leading the FB upstairs.This is exactly what I am talking about.
That hole in the defenses you mentioned? The one near the water reactor? I'm pretty sure that was my fault. Sorry about that.
I told you to stop writing on the walls!
I'm not sure the situation is salvageable.Well, to paraphrase Lord of the Rings, if this is to be Hellcannon's end, then let it be such an end as to be worthy of remembrance.
at this point everyone in the fort could die of old age and it will be something to rememberI'm not sure the situation is salvageable.Well, to paraphrase Lord of the Rings, if this is to be Hellcannon's end, then let it be such an end as to be worthy of remembrance.
at this point everyone in the fort could die of old age and it will be something to rememberI'm not sure the situation is salvageable.Well, to paraphrase Lord of the Rings, if this is to be Hellcannon's end, then let it be such an end as to be worthy of remembrance.
Just a heads up, I got a couple real life things taking my time up. I should be able to do another post Tuesday at the latest.
I just wanted to communicate that rather than just go dark for the rest of the week.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say that we should do the next fort in .23a.
Heavily modded, if the consensus be. Though vanilla should be fine enough? I really should have spoken up before people went ahead with preparing mods for 0.34 and genning another Aluonra there.
Perhaps, if we ever finish a fort before the next major version is released, we could revert back to 23a for the following one. That's unlikely, though, considering how long these forts tend to last. We're sitting at 8.5 months right now.Battlefailed was quite short, lastin only 3 months. We can never know with these forts.
Or Battlefailed 4 will be really, really short.
Before we choose, we should consider if we can survive the first turn on a region where corpses constantly re-animate. Or Battlefailed 4 will be really, really short.
The problem is not us not having the will to embark on a 100% terrifying area. That was never what I questioned. What I questioned is our capability of surviving past turn 1.
Go and read the first turns of both Battlefailed and Hellcannon, now imagine that with skelks that do not stay dead.
Thralls/Husks are utterly terrifying. That said, if the syndrome doesn't reach your dwarves IMMEDIATELY somehow, such an embark ought to be fairly survivable. The constant-reanimation embarks are tough... bring a 3-4 decent military dwarves (with weapons!), no animals, and hole up quickly, and it should be doable. Deadly rain is just a crapshoot.
I think we should be deciding what KIND of evil biome in .34 we want to locate. We can gen the world, then have a few people embark at different areas til we find the right one.
Thralls/Husks are utterly terrifying. That said, if the syndrome doesn't reach your dwarves IMMEDIATELY somehow, such an embark ought to be fairly survivable. The constant-reanimation embarks are tough... bring a 3-4 decent military dwarves (with weapons!), no animals, and hole up quickly, and it should be doable. Deadly rain is just a crapshoot.
I think we should be deciding what KIND of evil biome in .34 we want to locate. We can gen the world, then have a few people embark at different areas til we find the right one.
How about one as close as possible to a pleasant biome? Clearly the expedition was supposed to go there, but SOMEONE read the map wrong.
Thralls/Husks are utterly terrifying. That said, if the syndrome doesn't reach your dwarves IMMEDIATELY somehow, such an embark ought to be fairly survivable. The constant-reanimation embarks are tough... bring a 3-4 decent military dwarves (with weapons!), no animals, and hole up quickly, and it should be doable. Deadly rain is just a crapshoot.
I think we should be deciding what KIND of evil biome in .34 we want to locate. We can gen the world, then have a few people embark at different areas til we find the right one.
How about one as close as possible to a pleasant biome? Clearly the expedition was supposed to go there, but SOMEONE read the map wrong.
...shut up. I also read your blueprints wrong, but that's because there were booze stains from being used as coasters.
The better question would be who didn't use them as coasters? You leave a big detailed piece of paper on the table, and it's going to get used as a tablecloth.Thralls/Husks are utterly terrifying. That said, if the syndrome doesn't reach your dwarves IMMEDIATELY somehow, such an embark ought to be fairly survivable. The constant-reanimation embarks are tough... bring a 3-4 decent military dwarves (with weapons!), no animals, and hole up quickly, and it should be doable. Deadly rain is just a crapshoot.
I think we should be deciding what KIND of evil biome in .34 we want to locate. We can gen the world, then have a few people embark at different areas til we find the right one.
How about one as close as possible to a pleasant biome? Clearly the expedition was supposed to go there, but SOMEONE read the map wrong.
...shut up. I also read your blueprints wrong, but that's because there were booze stains from being used as coasters.
Sure, sure.....Just WHO used them as coasters though?...
EDIT: Oh, and Emerald... Have you been playing Bastion lately? Maybe it's just a coincidence, but your post reminded me a lot of that game.
EDIT: Oh, and Emerald... Have you been playing Bastion lately? Maybe it's just a coincidence, but your post reminded me a lot of that game.
Um no. I haven't ever played Bastion. In fact, I haven't heard of it before. But upon researching it, I wonder how I missed that train.
The thread, I think.
The fort's hanging on by a thread, from what I remember last.
Except instead of deciding it's on a strict one year schedule. And instead of going to the worthy it keeps passing through the hands of this lot.
Oh, and IT is waiting for Hellcannon's power to grow before IT kills the fort? ELF SACRIFICES FOR THE ELDRITCH ABOMINATION!
Bravo indeed. A fittingly epic end to a phenomenally epic fortress.
KAR WHY DIDN'T YOU RESPAWN
Oh well. Being the ninth one standing and also being the last noble of Hellcannon is respectable enough for me. Especially when another guy of the "Presidential Crew" (Kar, a medic, the captain of the guard, an armorer, and a farmer? I don't remember if the farmer actually was there.) managed to end up third and explode a demon with the power of FIST! So when is the fourth edition popping up? Or are we going to dare a reclaim?
Who will get the first turn, EmeraldWind? MagmaMcFry, who was the next in line? Will the turn list carry over or will we have a new one?My assumption is that Eric will get the first turn, since he's starting it. My personal opinion is that carrying the list over is probably not a great idea, since there are as many people on it as took turns in the whole of Hellcannon.
Who will get the first turn, EmeraldWind? MagmaMcFry, who was the next in line? Will the turn list carry over or will we have a new one?My assumption is that Eric will get the first turn, since he's starting it. My personal opinion is that carrying the list over is probably not a great idea, since there are as many people on it as took turns in the whole of Hellcannon.
Who will get the first turn, EmeraldWind? MagmaMcFry, who was the next in line? Will the turn list carry over or will we have a new one?My assumption is that Eric will get the first turn, since he's starting it. My personal opinion is that carrying the list over is probably not a great idea, since there are as many people on it as took turns in the whole of Hellcannon.
Agreed. Also consider that 5 out of the 12 people carried over from Failcannon were skipped. Also, it would make sense in the canon, if we're going to make 4 a prequel. Call Battlefailed, Failcannon, and Hellcannon the original trilogy. Then, after we have 3 more forts, people can have senseless debates about which trilogy was better.
Who will get the first turn, EmeraldWind? MagmaMcFry, who was the next in line? Will the turn list carry over or will we have a new one?My assumption is that Eric will get the first turn, since he's starting it. My personal opinion is that carrying the list over is probably not a great idea, since there are as many people on it as took turns in the whole of Hellcannon.
Agreed. Also consider that 5 out of the 12 people carried over from Failcannon were skipped. Also, it would make sense in the canon, if we're going to make 4 a prequel. Call Battlefailed, Failcannon, and Hellcannon the original trilogy. Then, after we have 3 more forts, people can have senseless debates about which trilogy was better.
So, in other words, Battlefailed was A New Hope?
I don't think there were enough Star Wars analogs. Also, Hellcannon was the one with ice, whereas The Empire Strikes Back had Hoth....
Your analogy is flawed, and you should feel flawed.
Who will get the first turn, EmeraldWind? MagmaMcFry, who was the next in line? Will the turn list carry over or will we have a new one?My assumption is that Eric will get the first turn, since he's starting it. My personal opinion is that carrying the list over is probably not a great idea, since there are as many people on it as took turns in the whole of Hellcannon.
Agreed. Also consider that 5 out of the 12 people carried over from Failcannon were skipped. Also, it would make sense in the canon, if we're going to make 4 a prequel. Call Battlefailed, Failcannon, and Hellcannon the original trilogy. Then, after we have 3 more forts, people can have senseless debates about which trilogy was better.
So, in other words, Battlefailed was A New Hope?
I don't think there were enough Star Wars analogs. Also, Hellcannon was the one with ice, whereas The Empire Strikes Back had Hoth....
Your analogy is flawed, and you should feel flawed.
Yeah, the analogy is pretty thin. But let's not insult each other, shall we? We are all madmendwarves here. I was mostly just poking fun at those who complain that the Star Wars prequels weren't as good as the original series.
Fair enough. We can all enjoy a little fun poking.quote.-midPy--ra-
So the demons finally figured out the pathing...
I'd like a turn in the next game, and if I'm not too late to claim one of the starting seven...?
So the demons finally figured out the pathing...
I'd like a turn in the next game, and if I'm not too late to claim one of the starting seven...?
Actually, the demons were practically lead around to the dwarves by the cats.
The pathing was so broke that the demons would standstill when they couldn't find a new target to kill, but the cats knew the layout of the fort better than even the dwarves apparently and were constantly leading the demons to the dwarves. With the exception of the couple of dwarves that made their way down where they shouldn't have gone.
Spoiler: The Foul One... (click to show/hide)
Who will get the first turn, EmeraldWind? MagmaMcFry, who was the next in line? Will the turn list carry over or will we have a new one?My assumption is that Eric will get the first turn, since he's starting it. My personal opinion is that carrying the list over is probably not a great idea, since there are as many people on it as took turns in the whole of Hellcannon.
Because I was simply startled by the sheer madness of this place (and thus retreated to my more benign thread) I must ask: What was the cause of this epic to sink like a sack of bricks?
Demonic incursion, right?
And so it ends, the greatest(this WAS the greatest, right?) clusterfuck of our story. It had a good run, the ups and downs of this fort were amusing. I also find it amusing that the fort ended on the turn 24, and I'm on spot 24 in the next fort's turn list.Actually, it ended on turn 25. Mego forgot to list arcangelsd as complete. A shame it wasn't 24 turns. Failcannon ended on turn 24.
Well, I better be on the turn list! I also wanted in on the starting seven, but something like 10 people already asked :P
*dumps magma for crickets*
*dumps magma for crickets*
It's QuakeCon weekend. Leave us alone, we're busy!
*dumps magma for crickets*
It's QuakeCon weekend. Leave us alone, we're busy!
This caused me to check out the info on QuakeCon, which caused me to find out about the MASSIVE quakecon special bundle on Steam. Thank you. I just bought about 25 great games and a ton of expansions at an overall discount around 80%. Sweet!
*dumps magma for crickets*
It's QuakeCon weekend. Leave us alone, we're busy!
This caused me to check out the info on QuakeCon, which caused me to find out about the MASSIVE quakecon special bundle on Steam. Thank you. I just bought about 25 great games and a ton of expansions at an overall discount around 80%. Sweet!
Steam Sales have sadly lost a lot of lustre for me. It's mostly a case of "got it... got it... got it..."
So, when are we planning to start the thread for Battlefailed IV? What still needs to be done before we can get things going again?
So, when are we planning to start the thread for Battlefailed IV? What still needs to be done before we can get things going again?
A ritual sacrifice, three half-numb cats,two barrels of dwarven beer, and the realization that my turn is ever-growing closer with evil designs upon the fort, whatever state it may be in.
I have two drums of 100% ethanol labelled "beer" in my basement. With hopes that it's strong enough, I cross out the beer from the list. Don't have a goat or any numb cats though.So, when are we planning to start the thread for Battlefailed IV? What still needs to be done before we can get things going again?A ritual sacrifice, three half-numb cats,two barrels of dwarven beer, and the realization that my turn is ever-growing closer with evil designs upon the fort, whatever state it may be in.
How about the Foul One? Gizogin, the last survivor (and resident badass) of Failcannon? Catalyst, who unleashed (if memory serves) the loyalty cascade?
Now what will we call the new fort?
3710414 giant sponges
My vote's still for Hell-something, where "something" is neither fail, battle, or cannon.
What about something completely new? I say we start fresh with the names, and go for something like Dragongild or Frozenhalls or whatever.
Everyone wants it to be a prequel... I like to move forward! After another apocalypse; a fresh start in the distant future that somehow sucks even more for those that have to live in it. Incompetent gods and such...
For the site, I STRONGLY suggest either researching the regions to find one where the dead don't reanimate (which would suck) or embark on the border of an awesome reanimating evil region and a much-less-evil one, so we have somewhere to stuff the corpses. There is no way the fort would survive to see the third year if nobody knows how to dispose of the corpses safely, so we pretty much need a safe region to toss them in, even if it's only 1/4 the map.
Mego and Gizogin could have escaped through the cracks in reality
If it's okay with everyone, I'll start the thread once we decide for a name (unless Eric wants to, don't know since he placed the world here. confused I am.). First turn will go to one of the claimed starting seven (decided by post order in this thread a few pages ago) that is not me.
By post order, the starting seven are: TAD, Gizogin, Sinterous (Sinpwn), Myself,arsenicCatniparmaggedonCounselor, DevilEd, Catalyst.
EDIT: Finally added Helcannon's end to the archive. Will post/edit when it's uploaded.
(unless Eric wants to, don't know since he placed the world here. confused I am.)
Yay you continued the joke that I thought nobody noticed.
Looks like that is cleared out. So we only need a name.(unless Eric wants to, don't know since he placed the world here. confused I am.)
Hellnope!
While I remember, TAD isn't a god in disguise. He is just always there. Wherever you go, a sneaky dwarf is planning to do....something in your fortress via an overly-complex scheme and multiple elaborate disguises
"Fail" is important to me, as I feel it's been definitive in this series. I like the idea of a 3+ part name.
I'm still in favor of "Hellboat the Failure of Cannons"
So Aluonra is yin, and Xemorid is yang...I only used the yin-yang as an easy visualization of what I was talking about.
Does that not infer the existence of an inherently barren world representing wuji?
I vote Battlefailed 4 on a very barren world where people barely survive, if we're going with the yin/yang idea.
That earlier site suggestion also made me wonder if the spot is an island embark. Wouldn't that leave only the undead, megabeasties and titans as our opponents since none of the other entities could reach us but dorfs?
The australia island is also mostly good biomes, with some evil in the middle.That earlier site suggestion also made me wonder if the spot is an island embark. Wouldn't that leave only the undead, megabeasties and titans as our opponents since none of the other entities could reach us but dorfs?
No, I'm pretty sure we dismissed the Australia of the Gods as a possible embark site a long time ago precisely because of that. The other site I found is on the mainland, a swampy peninsula jutting out into what used to be the Blueness of Malodors way back in Battlefailed's day, and it's quite close to at least three goblin fortresses to boot.
No, I'm pretty sure we dismissed the Australia of the Gods as a possible embark site a long time ago precisely because of that. The other site I found is on the mainland, a swampy peninsula jutting out into what used to be the Blueness of Malodors way back in Battlefailed's day, and it's quite close to at least three goblin fortresses to boot.
Maybe if I can get a copy of the world after we create it, I'll try out an embark on Australia of the Gods and see if it's interesting at all, just for the sake of my curiousity?
Maybe if I can get a copy of the world after we create it, I'll try out an embark on Australia of the Gods and see if it's interesting at all, just for the sake of my curiousity?
Eric uploaded the world here (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=96005.msg3516190#msg3516190).
Also, if the current turn order isn't carried over (which is for the best I think), I'd like to claim a turn now please.
The rain is RIDICULOUS. There are literally birds tumbling from the sky and dying because they get rained on and incapacitated mid-flight.
It occurs to me the name is awfully, horribly appropriate. Hellboat (if you take "boat" as a metaphor for "fortress") describes the hellish location, and "The failure of battles" speaks to the utter futility of ever laying siege to the place. The weather phenomenon, once successfully avoided, becomes the best defense in the world. I guess the question becomes whether it remains this awesome after you have a fort safely established.
The migrants/caravans problem could be solved by making several seal-able entrances across the map. A 1-tile channel with a bridge inside should be enough. Not that we will get any sieges there, so battles are probably going to be dwarf vs dwarf.
Terrifying is a pretty good description of that place. :o
I'll be checking out some other locations and the terrors associated with them.
Eh, I don't know about the yin-yang idea. AFAIK, the Foul One is only interested in consuming and unmaking worlds, not creating new ones. It is the pure essence of nothingness, the antithesis of all that is real, it may not even be sentient as we know it. I think that it is physically (insofar as such an adjective can be applied to it) incapable of making anything.
Spoiler: This is what 'absurdly lethal' looks like... (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: This is what 'absurdly lethal' looks like... (click to show/hide)
That looks a bit familiar to my turn in the Swordthunders reclaim. My dwarf there was reduced to a massive blob of blisters after punching the snot out of a FB. To make things worse, she just laid unconscious in a bed for the 3-4 months that I played, refusing to die, while the FB (along with almost every ghost in the fortress) was watching over her bed.
Didn't you also have every other dwarf unconscious in the hospital along with yours, as well as two FB's in a horrible toxic orgy?
Spoiler: This is what 'absurdly lethal' looks like... (click to show/hide)
That looks a bit familiar to my turn in the Swordthunders reclaim. My dwarf there was reduced to a massive blob of blisters after punching the snot out of a FB. To make things worse, she just laid unconscious in a bed for the 3-4 months that I played, refusing to die, while the FB (along with almost every ghost in the fortress) was watching over her bed.
Didn't you also have every other dwarf unconscious in the hospital along with yours, as well as two FB's in a horrible toxic orgy?
Didn't you also have every other dwarf unconscious in the hospital along with yours, as well as two FB's in a horrible toxic orgy?
"Two Forgotten Beasts in a Horrible Toxic Orgy" sounds like a good name for a death metal comedy/parody band. Or an average day back in Failcannon.
Too long. The band name would be "Two Forgotten Beasts," while "Horrible Toxic Orgy" is the album title.
EDIT: Actually, I'm not sure it wouldn't work better reversed.
"And now, here's Horrible Toxic Orgy, with a song from their latest album, Two Forgotten Beasts!"
"Two Forgotten Beasts" probably works best as a music/album name.Too long. The band name would be "Two Forgotten Beasts," while "Horrible Toxic Orgy" is the album title.
EDIT: Actually, I'm not sure it wouldn't work better reversed.
"And now, here's Horrible Toxic Orgy, with a song from their latest album, Two Forgotten Beasts!"
Yeah, I was considering just going with "Horrible Toxic Orgy", it does sound better on its own. I don't really know about "Two Forgotten Beasts" as an album title, maybe it could be a tribute band of some sort, the supporting programme to start the performance while Horrible Toxic Orgy is waking up with hangovers backstage?
We need a name and a location so I can get the next fort going. Mego, maybe you can use the poll on top of the thread for that?
Has the name for FailCannon IV been set in stone? If not, I'd just like to put in my two-cent idea:
The Common Plank.
Also, have a pleasant day, all of you.
I'd like to throw DarkHell into the pot as well.
I'd like to throw DarkHell into the pot as well.
That'll only encourage them to try and dig a straight vertical shaft to hell, you know.
Didn't we just do that?I'd like to throw DarkHell into the pot as well.
That'll only encourage them to try and dig a straight vertical shaft to hell, you know.
And this is a problem, why? :P
Alright, I'll try my hand at some serious names.
Helltide
The Waves of Failure
The Worst of Worlds
Warfailed
Savagephantom
And excuse me for trying to be nice. It's not like I'm trying to jinx the fort.
It's really just the fact that you said Failcannon IV.Oh, It turns out, I am an idiot, in every sense of the word. GO ME!
It's really just the fact that you said Failcannon IV.Oh, It turns out, I am an idiot, in every sense of the word. GO ME!
But yeah, sorry. I'm still looking at Failcannon right now, and I completely forgot it was a sequel, though I still remembered this would be the fourth. Again, GO ME!
Or, hell, maybe something with "Cannon" as the front compound. That hasn't been done.CannonCrest
HellcanyonCannonWalls!
Hellkitchen
Hellkitten
Hellchicken
Or, hell, maybe something with "Cannon" as the front compound. That hasn't been done.
Or, hell, maybe something with "Cannon" as the front compound. That hasn't been done.CannonCrest
CannonRule
CannonBurn
CannonBorn
CannonTruth
CannonThinking
CannonQueenElizabethIII
I dunno, it doesn't quite have that same ring to it that Hell or Fail have as a first compound.
Or, hell, maybe something with "Cannon" as the front compound. That hasn't been done.CannonCrest
CannonRule
CannonBurn
CannonBorn
CannonTruth
CannonThinking
CannonQueenElizabethIII
I dunno, it doesn't quite have that same ring to it that Hell or Fail have as a first compound.
It says something about DF that Hell and Fail both add the same amount of cool to a fort name.
Then the only solution, is for whoever embarks to choose the name and tell democracy to go shove itself. That's what anymodern-day noblepolitician would do!
I found a nice vicious tundra/forest/neutral grassland embark up in the north-west. Very cold, but the forest's ponds thaw during summer. Undead, and two forms of horrible mists. The nefarious mist in the forest causes extreme swelling, to the point of possible blood loss/necrosis on smaller creatures, and the msit in the tundra does... I dunno. One of the dorfs with an axe went berserk and murdered everyone before symptoms showed up.
I found a nice vicious tundra/forest/neutral grassland embark up in the north-west. Very cold, but the forest's ponds thaw during summer. Undead, and two forms of horrible mists. The nefarious mist in the forest causes extreme swelling, to the point of possible blood loss/necrosis on smaller creatures, and the msit in the tundra does... I dunno. One of the dorfs with an axe went berserk and murdered everyone before symptoms showed up.Screenshot with location, please?
I found a nice vicious tundra/forest/neutral grassland embark up in the north-west. Very cold, but the forest's ponds thaw during summer. Undead, and two forms of horrible mists. The nefarious mist in the forest causes extreme swelling, to the point of possible blood loss/necrosis on smaller creatures, and the msit in the tundra does... I dunno. One of the dorfs with an axe went berserk and murdered everyone before symptoms showed up.
EDIT: Opened the world and... no sword of boots civ. Do we even have a Queen Led?
If they're a vampire anyway, that could be reasonable. Led, though, would not immediately have contacts in this world, and wouldn't necessarily be here before The Foul One sent her here to deal with us.
If they're a vampire anyway, that could be reasonable. Led, though, would not immediately have contacts in this world, and wouldn't necessarily be here before The Foul One sent her here to deal with us.
Led could use Andreus's possessing technique on someone after sliding into this world.
And it's up after a minor fail on my part. I'll send a pm with the save to TAG now.
Necro'ing this a bit...
Deathswords .doc is awesome, but I generally do not use that format, so I went and converted it into a PDF for my own ebook viewing pleasure.
Here is a link to it for anyone else interested - https://dl.dropbox.com/u/18216514/BATTLEFAILED.pdf