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Author Topic: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves  (Read 1496808 times)

Keldor

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3615 on: May 22, 2012, 08:55:06 pm »

Mac isn't Dorfy enough.

Linux... now that's Dwarfy.

Mac is downright Elfy, in fact.  Intuitive rather than logical, and restrictive with doing anything outside of the expected user behavior.  Also, there's the general air of condecension about it (though that might just be the user base).
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If ignorance is bliss, why are my dwarves all tantruming?

wierd

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3616 on: May 22, 2012, 10:07:32 pm »

You think macOS is bad?


Try the amiga user fanbase.  If windows users are humans, and linux users dwarves, and osx users are elven.....amiga fan..things... are the residents of the necromancer's tower, raising the bones of the dead to do unnantural things.

Behold! The computer undead!
« Last Edit: May 22, 2012, 10:13:42 pm by wierd »
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WillowLuman

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3617 on: May 22, 2012, 11:34:04 pm »

With macs, it's the user base that's mainly condescending. The ad campaigns do add to it some, though. I just have a 6 year old mac that's barely kicking along, after my main DF computer, a 6 year old Dell laptop, kicked the bucket 2 weeks ago.
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Nyxalinth

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3618 on: May 23, 2012, 12:47:42 am »

You think macOS is bad?


Try the amiga user fanbase.  If windows users are humans, and linux users dwarves, and osx users are elven.....amiga fan..things... are the residents of the necromancer's tower, raising the bones of the dead to do unnantural things.

Behold! The computer undead!

In that case, I'll be off to compose my lengthy tome while my undead minions lurch around my tower :D  It shall be called "Ancientglories" and be written with much complaining about how an inferior system won out due to better marketing and it will be bound in elf bones /tongue in cheek

Seriously, while I miss my Amiga, I do love my PC.
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Nyxalinth likes the color blue, gaming, writing, art, cats for their aloofness,  Transformers for their sentience and ability to transform, and the Constructicons for their hard work and building skills. Whenever possible, she prefers to consume bacon cheeseburgers and pinot noir. She absolutely detests stupid people.

Meta The Golem

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3619 on: May 23, 2012, 10:04:46 pm »

some one should make a GlaDOS with a bookkeeper and a crap ton of leavers.
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Sus

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3620 on: May 24, 2012, 10:51:04 am »

You think macOS is bad?


Try the amiga user fanbase.  If windows users are humans, and linux users dwarves, and osx users are elven.....amiga fan..things... are the residents of the necromancer's tower, raising the bones of the dead to do unnantural things.

Behold! The computer undead!

In that case, I'll be off to compose my lengthy tome while my undead minions lurch around my tower :D  It shall be called "Ancientglories" and be written with much complaining about how an inferior system won out due to better marketing and it will be bound in elf bones /tongue in cheek

Seriously, while I miss my Amiga, I do love my PC.
Ah, poor Amiga. Wonderful for gaming and making demos, not so much for anything else. Yet it still evokes a feeling of nostalgia...  :)
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fakechuck

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3621 on: May 24, 2012, 01:35:44 pm »

The most annoying thing to me right now is the fact that trading is a lower priority job than anything else. This really doesn't make any sense given there is a dedicated position for brokerage and having to assign my broker to a 'TRADE NOW MOTHERFUCKER' burrow gets old quickly.
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Callista

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3622 on: May 24, 2012, 03:04:21 pm »

The most annoying thing to me right now is the fact that trading is a lower priority job than anything else. This really doesn't make any sense given there is a dedicated position for brokerage and having to assign my broker to a 'TRADE NOW MOTHERFUCKER' burrow gets old quickly.
Yeah, that's really crazy. Nothing should be higher priority than trading, other than eating when starving or drinking while dehydrated (not just "hungry" or "thirsty"). I think part of the problem is that the trader doesn't get the go-to-depot task until everything's been dragged to the depot already, and by then he's usually found something else to do. My solution would be to have the trading be a high priority task that starts when the first item lands in the depot and doesn't get canceled unless the broker is starving, dehydrated, asleep on the spot, or chased away by an enemy.
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fakechuck

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3623 on: May 24, 2012, 03:21:57 pm »

The status of pending trade goods isn't even factored here as far as I can tell. Even when all goods are in the depot, my broker would rather dump things in a garbage pile, store random shit in stockpiles, and basically find anything else possible to do except trade in the damn depot.
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Hanslanda

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3624 on: May 24, 2012, 10:25:25 pm »

Dear Mistem McMechanic,
Why, in the name of me, did you think that that side of the door was the correct one to link it from?  Do you LIKE being on fire?  It could be arranged, very swiftly. Magma is no joke, and it isn't funny when you attempt to set yourself on fire. Are you from Jackass? Did you get a social skill stat boost from running around on fire like, well, a jackass?

Sincerely,
Supreme Overlord
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Jake

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3625 on: May 25, 2012, 01:59:09 am »

Dear God of Random Numbers,

Sending no fewer than twelve hunters to the fortress I've using to test the Black Powder Firearms mod would have been more helpful if the mod wasn't horribly, horribly broken for no apparent reason, but currently feels rather like you're mocking me. It's also creating some logistical issues; I haven't even been able to plant half the crops I have seeds for lest we run out of larder space, and if I foist much more of the surplus upon the merchants I'll have their home civ preferring charges of attempted murder by cholesterol poisoning!

All the same, thanks for the four fey moods in genuinely useful skills and an "ambush" that consisted of about five goblins, all of whom were clobbered by the caravan guards without trouble while my so-called militia were buggering about trying to find their armour.

Yours,

An Avatar of Armok and Novice Modder.
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Never used Dwarf Therapist, mods or tilesets in all the years I've been playing.
I think Toady's confusing interface better simulates the experience of a bunch of disorganised drunken dwarves running a fort.

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Ruhn

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3626 on: May 25, 2012, 12:37:59 pm »

Dear cats and kittens of Lionwalls,

Yes, I saw the lizard down in the dry moat.  Somehow one of you used cat-ESP to alert every other feline in the fortress of this fact.  Why don't you give up?  The maintenance hatch is quite locked, there is no way to get to this lizard.  In fact, the hatch is locked for your safety.  It could be quite dangerous to go down there if ...

Screw it, you all just had full litters anyway.  Good luck with that.

Disclaimer: No dwarves were injured in the battle for the lizard.

snoopychicken

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3627 on: May 25, 2012, 07:41:04 pm »

Dear migrants to Bronzecuts.
From now on no migrant wave will be allowed in if they bring more children than they do adults. We've got enough dead weight, we don't need anymore!

Love to your mothers,
All Seeing God.
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ZzarkLinux

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3628 on: May 25, 2012, 07:57:54 pm »

Dear Pond Grabber of RabbitHut

Maybe it's just me, but it seems like you've been sitting in that cavern lake for way too long.

Yes, it is cool to see you down there, and you're also hanging out with those Cave Fish (They do exist).
But I'm starting to think that you are blocking undead wildlife from spawning. All I see is you, and nothing else.

I've sealed off your pool, and the Dwarves are using another pool for cleaning/drinking/pumping.
Please vacate the map so that hopefully more zombies will appear.

Sincerely,
The Overseer

P.S. I don't have time to drop a mountain on you. Please just leave now
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Sarkovar

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3629 on: May 26, 2012, 12:37:22 am »

Dear Urist McRambo
     We had assumed all was lost when the goblin swordmaster slew our brave militia commander. Little did we know that the swordmaster's callous slaying of a little duckling would send you, a humble pot ash maker, into a rage so legendary we shudder at the very memory of it. You proceeded to slay the swordmaster and his entourage, not with a mighty weapon of steel but with a piece of wood. Even when the vile goblins stabbed you in the heart you continued to slay them until finally with your dying breath you crushed the swordmaster's skull. We interred you in our finest tomb along with your precious duckling and noble oak log. As our final gift we bestow upon you the title of Kinron "Oakenrage".

With tears in my eyes and pride in my chest, your's eternally, The Overseer
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