Commander: Alright, let's do this shit.
Elder: Unfortunate, that you have to-
Commander: Not listening. Alright team, we got some aliens to smush.
Elder: Is that a floating gun?
(https://i.imgur.com/lY0JSp9.png)
Commander: Hell yeah. Now let's get this ball rolling.
Brass: Aye sir. Am I still in command?
Commander: Yep.
Brass: Awesome.
Kaos: (Thank, fucking, god)
Commander: Kaos, you're on deputy leadership duty.
Kaos: (Fuck) Yes sir.
(https://i.imgur.com/zT3rIzL.png)
Brass: Alright, all forces advances. King, take point.
King: Aye.
*some time later*
King: I have visual.
(https://i.imgur.com/P1MtWCN.png)
Brass: Take a closer look if you can.
King: Aye. *is revealed*
(https://i.imgur.com/ZiChfLD.png)
King: Fuck.
Brass: So much for the stealthy approach. Engage!
Commander: That sectopod really shouldn't be out here.
CB: Who cares? We're dropping it.
(https://i.imgur.com/eH0je4T.png)
*CB goes in and does what Samurai does best*
CB: Ah hell. More of 'em!
(https://i.imgur.com/6Y88hnm.png)
Commander: Wow, I mean I usually see this shit behind a screen but this vision thing is stupid.
Brass: I know, right?
(https://i.imgur.com/j15ynie.png)
Shock&Awe: Rapport later, fight now!
Commander: Ok, ok, geez.
(https://i.imgur.com/7r6sx0y.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/n8KI4VI.png)
Literally Everybody: O_O
Elder: See?! See??? I told you he was amazing!
Elder2: Ok, jeez. You know he's out to kill us, right?
Elder: ...I'm strangely ok with that.
Elder3: (Fukin' M.)
*Acts of incredible violence continues*
(https://i.imgur.com/6Ptf13b.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/DiWEIUU.png)
Brass: Do something about that sectopod. Leaving it alone seems stupid.
One-Shot: Aye.
(https://i.imgur.com/QqXjps8.png)
Brass: Rojas!
Rojas: On it!
(https://i.imgur.com/pC3JSdn.png)
Rojas: I got a little something for a situation just like this.
(https://i.imgur.com/VkVowzW.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/YGBYmqv.png)
Everyone: O_O
Alien responsible for armoring the aliens: Ok see how the fuck is
that fair? I spent like three hours making sure their plating is up to code!
Commander: you guys have a code?
Alien Armorer: Who did you think we were, Chinese?
[Disclaimer: I can make that joke about my own people]
Brass: Alright, it's on the ropes. Who's got the last shot?
Porkins: Me.
(https://i.imgur.com/pgSzBLu.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/BpMN3pZ.png)
Alien Armorer: *pathetic sobbing*
Commander: there's a Mech with overwatch. Somebody tap him so we can get a move on.
Kaos: Got it.
(https://i.imgur.com/BpMN3pZ.png)
Kaos: There's another mech out there.
(https://i.imgur.com/wqyV8c7.png)
Brass: Got it.
Commander: Why can't we just get Shen to deploy a cloud of these things?
Shen: Because we're poor, commander.
(https://i.imgur.com/jI7j52I.png)
Commander: Ok, right, the mission.
Jack: Thank you.
Brass: Mop 'em up, will you?
Vanya & CB: Yep.
*They do*
Bradford: Commander, ADVENT is stepping up their attacks across the globe.
Commander: Understood. Keep as we are.
Brass: Really?
Commander: Taking unneccessary risks in the name of speed won't make this go any faster. King, up front.
King: I see 'em.
(https://i.imgur.com/LLZpLrn.png)
Flash: Moving forward. *pops the pod*.
Archon: Hey guys we heard like twenty people dying, do you happen to know what was up with that?
Everyone: Yes.
Archon: Cool. REPENT SINNERS
CB: BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD
(https://i.imgur.com/2yu2ACh.png)
CB: I win.
Archon: PURGE THE UNWORTHY!! *Blazing Pinyons*
(https://i.imgur.com/zCc8hJ7.png)
Commander who has cheated in like 200 AWC days: That seems like cheating.
Everyone: =_=
Commander: What? Just putting that out there.
CB: SHIT!
(https://i.imgur.com/Q9ca4yU.png)
Matron: I got him.
(https://i.imgur.com/K9zLBYW.png)
CB: Whew. Thank ya.
Matron: Watch the window.
CB: yep.
(https://i.imgur.com/L7v5rE6.png)
*Our turn*
Brass: MURDER THAT FUCKING ARCHON!
Archon: HERESY!
*Everybody lays into him*
(https://i.imgur.com/AEg8kh8.png)
Jack: Now stay dead.
Brass: Good, now kill the last of 'em.
*they do*
Rojas: Next batch here.
(https://i.imgur.com/tnJXGcu.png)
Brass: Pity they saw us like this. Reform and engage.
Commander: MORTAL COMBAT!!
(https://i.imgur.com/FGA5c72.png)
Commander: Don't stand in that when it explodes, it'll kill ya.
Brass: ...right, well, mop up the rest.
Kaos: Is it really mop up if they're basically fresh?
(https://i.imgur.com/yxjSMzZ.png)
Rojas: Gah! Fuck.
Shen: My armor! I spent hours on that!
Alien: SEE?!
(https://i.imgur.com/LC6h9NY.png)
Rojas: Cunt.
Brass: There was no way you'd hit.
Rojas: It's the message that matters.
One-Shot: What, that you're a terrible shot?
Rojas: Shush, you. Also, dead Andro moving in.
(https://i.imgur.com/0Uyb0YG.png)
Porkins: Got 'em.
Brass: Nice shot.
(https://i.imgur.com/c1PHWoc.png)
Brass: Jesus christ.
Commander: Told you stepping in it would be a bad idea.
Brass: Well...ok then.
Porkins: Engaging bogey.
(https://i.imgur.com/BLR35rz.png)
Brass: Do you have to spin like that?
Porkin: Dunno what you're talking about.
King: Uh, guys?
(https://i.imgur.com/hDcL8Xi.png)
Commander: Eyes on the prize, people. What the aliens are doing is an open secret.
King: R-right. There's another group beyond the enclosure.
(https://i.imgur.com/HmmRPhl.png)
Brass: Copy. Finish off these two first.
*so they do*
(https://i.imgur.com/AIYDR9Z.png)
CB: More of 'em!
Brass: HOLD FIRE
CB: Too late!
(https://i.imgur.com/YufEJq0.png)
Brass: Oh sweet jesus.
CB: Um.
Commander: It's specifically your problem.
CB: Damn.
Brass: Engage!
(https://i.imgur.com/n7su4oz.png)
Kaos: Aye.
Brass: Get some frost on those balls before they fuck all of us.
Jack: I can only hit one of them.
Brass: Better than nothing. Do it.
(https://i.imgur.com/xtLZFkE.png)
Jack: Done.
Commander: I'll take him.
Brass: What
(https://i.imgur.com/Kdn01Nh.png)
Brass: Couldn't you have done that on the live one?
Commander: Can't. It was live.
Brass: ...I'll take your word for it.
Commander: Mop up the Codexes before this more complicated.
Vanya: 'k.
(https://i.imgur.com/848uH6D.png)
(Repeat above a few times)
Brass: Look out, they're moving!
(https://i.imgur.com/h6lHldx.png)
Commander: Ah shit.
(https://i.imgur.com/6D2tTBm.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/HIzK8kP.png)
A lot people: Fuckin' Hell!
(https://i.imgur.com/BfzreL1.png)
Vanya: Fuckin' hell.
(https://i.imgur.com/FxTo9lq.png)
Vanya: Payback's a bitch, ain't it?
Commander: Hey Vanya, your shield's still working, right?
Vanya: Yes, why?
Commander: Just checking.
(https://i.imgur.com/1UN2COx.png)
Vanya: WHAT THE HELL?!?
Commander: It held, didn't it?
(https://i.imgur.com/KxJ5p4H.png)
Rojas: Just kill the damn balls before things get worse!
Porkins: Aye.
(https://i.imgur.com/9xENA96.png)
(He looks so strangely white.)
(https://i.imgur.com/zAUAIaX.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/2fn1CDP.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/GL0uhIA.png)
(All that happened in one turn)
Commander: Damn. Good work Leeroy. Alright, reform and advance, we're not out of the woods yet.
(We executed the captured Gateway later)
(https://i.imgur.com/aEo2VdB.png)
Brass: new batch. What's on the menu?
(https://i.imgur.com/6Xg3Jbl.png)
Commander: I got this.
(https://i.imgur.com/ZTg2vrz.png)
Brass: Nicely done, sir. Alright, mop 'em up.
Shock&Awe: Done.
(https://i.imgur.com/UzZ0VNO.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/8dnOAZY.png)
Brass: Alright, now let's see what we're...
(https://i.imgur.com/PEmKprs.png)
Brass: ...dealing...with.
Kaos: Were we under water the entire time?
Commander: Target in front, focus on him first.
(https://i.imgur.com/LtbdK4n.png)
(Avatar shows up then poofs)
Commander: So that's how it's gonna be. Everybody move up and position.
King: I see 'em.
(https://i.imgur.com/NVOizvb.png)
Commander: Good. Let's finish this.
Kaos: Understood.
(https://i.imgur.com/u2WaIQr.png)
Commander: Begin.
Hellion: Hell yeah.
(https://i.imgur.com/mdIu7NV.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/rLhdYKh.png)
Kaos: Piss.
(Kaos proceeds to miss every overwatch shot except one)
Schmidt: My turn.
(https://i.imgur.com/GltFQtp.png)
Kaos: Your turn to do what?
Schmidt: Shush.
Kaos: I'm just sayin', if you can't deliver-
Schmidt: Wait where did the Avatar go?
(https://i.imgur.com/K8D3kcL.png)
King: He's dead.
Porkins: LEEROY
(https://i.imgur.com/CAmtC4X.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/yxDZfXD.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/CT3FvNY.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/4USsw0P.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/bn5wZEY.png)
Porkins: ...Porkins.
Brass: Oh my god he just killed everything.
Kaos: Is that how that joke went?
King: what do we do now? the Avatar is dead.
Commander: They have spares. Set up and prepare to intercept anything that comes out of the other gateways.
*A few Faceless and Codexes warp in*
Kaos: Let's get to work then.
(https://i.imgur.com/R5NmBDP.png)
CB: Aye.
(https://i.imgur.com/lxF58OG.png)
*They get ded really fast*
(https://i.imgur.com/nJASw8e.png)
Avatar: 'Sup?
King: 'sup.
(https://i.imgur.com/kjFNnhV.png)
Avatar: Blarg
Matron: Yo.
(https://i.imgur.com/XgY95ZF.png)
Avatar: *ded*
(https://i.imgur.com/azC8iKy.png)
The Elders: Ok guys we really need to give our Avatars some actual armor
*some 20 minutes of wiping out mooks later*
(https://i.imgur.com/arlfyyn.png)
Commander: Third one is here.
Kaos: Aye.
(https://i.imgur.com/YQ2jqmo.png)
Commander: can you drag him closer?
Kaos: Ok, one more.
(https://i.imgur.com/iHjI2nC.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/rkeXlkG.png)
Kaos: ...he's out of my line of sight.
Hellion: I'll break his legs!
Avatar: Wait what
(https://i.imgur.com/QXezhgu.png)
Avatar: Blarg
Commander: hello.
Avatar: ...Uh.
(https://i.imgur.com/klNbie7.png)
Avatar: Can we talk about this?
Commander: No.
Avatar: Dang.
(https://i.imgur.com/xybqiXU.png)
Commander: Indeed.