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Author Topic: The Infinite Heavens: More than one way to skin a cat.  (Read 334279 times)

Toaster

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Too Quiet.
« Reply #1995 on: March 01, 2016, 12:03:33 pm »

((Was Dave not rolled for on purpose?  He was on the platform with Xan.))

"WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!"


Try to get Xan free!  He's got that fire magic, right?  Can't he use it?
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HMR stands for Hazardous Materials Requisition, not Horrible Massive Ruination, though I can understand how one could get confused.
God help us if we have to agree on pizza toppings at some point. There will be no survivors.

Comrade P.

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Too Quiet.
« Reply #1996 on: March 01, 2016, 12:32:34 pm »

Here I go, burning my hand into crisp again.

1. Order warbeast (via Engine Spirit) to jolt forward - hopefully some of these ropes aren't secured yet.
2. Open fire at the edges of the canyon. I have five shots of oily blood rounds loaded, fire them all. Target the areas where the ropes lead from the beast.
« Last Edit: March 01, 2016, 12:51:52 pm by Comrade P. »
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Sigs

Nobody exists on purpose. Nobody belongs anywhere. Everybody’s gonna die. Come watch TV?

Yoink

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Too Quiet.
« Reply #1997 on: March 01, 2016, 01:05:00 pm »

Mr. Bird: Heroically save the day by bombarding the mysterious attackers with poop.   
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Booze is Life for Yoink

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you need to reconsider your life
If there's any cause worth dying for, it's memes.

Xantalos

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Too Quiet.
« Reply #1998 on: March 01, 2016, 03:05:30 pm »

"I AM GOING TO BURN YOU ALL IN THIS AND YOUR NEXT INCARNATION FOR SUCH AN AFFRONT!"

Free myself/accept help being freed. Then go burninate everything in the direction the arrow that hit me came from with anything burny I have at my disposal. Molotovs, fire magic, etc.
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Sig! Onol
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XANTALOS, THE KARATEBOMINATION
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Harry Baldman

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Too Quiet.
« Reply #1999 on: March 01, 2016, 03:19:09 pm »

"Woods are full of angry beasties, lads! Though I suppose you can tell by now, yes?"

Fly higher and higher, and test whether it is possible to kill someone with feces flying at ballistic velocities. The attackers, probably.
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Egan_BW

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Too Quiet.
« Reply #2000 on: March 01, 2016, 03:59:09 pm »

"HAHAHA FUCKERS I GOT SOMETHING FOR THAT SELF-PRESERVATION YOU GOT THERE."

Use the orb (NOT the skull) to hum the tune of the Hungarian suicide song as loud as possible in the general direction of the attackers. Use the skull to scream the lyrics to an entirely different song at my comrades and myself.
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DoctorMcTaalik

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Too Quiet.
« Reply #2001 on: March 01, 2016, 05:00:54 pm »

Drop to the deck, and try to staunch the bleeding with my cloak. Think happy thoughts.
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piecewise

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Too Quiet.
« Reply #2002 on: March 03, 2016, 01:15:57 pm »

((Was Dave not rolled for on purpose?  He was on the platform with Xan.))

"WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!"


Try to get Xan free!  He's got that fire magic, right?  Can't he use it?
Dave was rolled for, Harry's birdman wasn't because he was flying up high enough to not be in danger.

[4] You gallop over to xan and bite hold of the shaft of the arrow, pulling on it with all your might. You don't quite get it free, but you get it extremely close. Unless Xan is some sort of childlike baby man with the strength of a boneless mouse, he should be able to get himself the rest of the way out.

"I AM GOING TO BURN YOU ALL IN THIS AND YOUR NEXT INCARNATION FOR SUCH AN AFFRONT!"

Free myself/accept help being freed. Then go burninate everything in the direction the arrow that hit me came from with anything burny I have at my disposal. Molotovs, fire magic, etc.
[3] You wiggle and waggle and pry and pull and finally get yourself free, though you leave a rather large chunk of floppy arm behind as you do.

[5] You run to the railing, pulling out a moltov as you do. You know for a fact that your magic is weak here, you can't conjure much more than a warm breeze or a incense stick worth of foul smelling smoke. But maybe...maybe if you do something a bit different. You hold the rag fuse of the moltov up next to your mouth and grind your teeth together with a single hard motion. Sparks fly as though you were striking flint, spraying out of your mouth and onto the rag. It ignites with a "WOMP" and you hurl the firebomb down into the woods. It hits a tree limb and bursts, spraying flaming fluid over a wide area and igniting the forest. Several of the tow lines attached to the war beast also catch fire.

"Woods are full of angry beasties, lads! Though I suppose you can tell by now, yes?"

Fly higher and higher, and test whether it is possible to kill someone with feces flying at ballistic velocities. The attackers, probably.
[1]
Here I go, burning my hand into crisp again.

1. Order warbeast (via Engine Spirit) to jolt forward - hopefully some of these ropes aren't secured yet.
2. Open fire at the edges of the canyon. I have five shots of oily blood rounds loaded, fire them all. Target the areas where the ropes lead from the beast.

You shout for the warbeast to run and you're in the midst of aiming your pistol when a fist sized mound of avian waste hits you square in the top of the head with enough force to knock you to the ground. This is...one of the worst things to happen to you in a while. And that includes having your skin replaced with scar tissue and charcoal.

"HAHAHA FUCKERS I GOT SOMETHING FOR THAT SELF-PRESERVATION YOU GOT THERE."

Use the orb (NOT the skull) to hum the tune of the Hungarian suicide song as loud as possible in the general direction of the attackers. Use the skull to scream the lyrics to an entirely different song at my comrades and myself.
[3]
This would probably be a very effective weapon if you were on key.  Also you're humming a very lackluster rendition of "Bohemian Rhapsody" instead of the suicide song so it's pretty much a fail all around.  Perhaps your attempts at sonic warfare will distract them, if nothing else.

Drop to the deck, and try to staunch the bleeding with my cloak. Think happy thoughts.
[5]
You flatten yourself against the deck and manage to almost instantly stop the bleeding via liberal use of your cloak as both bandage and tourniquet. Still hurts like a mother fucker but for some reason you really don't mind. In your head everything is fine, this entire event is nothing but gumdrops and delicious gazelle carcasses being fed to you by scantly clad women.





The Warbeast strains forward, pulling against the tow lines. The burning lines snap in a spray of embers and several of the the other lines tear free, trailing the trees they were anchored to behind them. The Beast makes it a few steps forward and stops, still pulling hard on the lines but unable to move any further forward

"They've bound our feet" The engine spirit announces, "Some kind of cable is connecting them together and anchoring them down. Whoever these attackers are, they seem quite practiced in taking down large creatures. Fighting might be our only option unless you can sever these lines."

As he says this the shadowy figures from the forest below begin to climb up the tow cables. You can see them more clearly now; their garb is tribal in design; leather and fur festooned with beads, stones, and all manner of small bones. They carry weapons strapped to their backs, large cleavers, Maquahuitl made out of wood with what look like oversized razor blades embedded in them. As they climb the ropes they bellow and chant, singing something in a language you don't understand.  They are not hellborn though, their bodies are vastly disparate, though most appear to be some kind of semi-humanoid animal or sapient beast. A crocodile headed man, a snake with 4 arms, a gorilla with shrunken and vestigial legs and head, just a furry heavily muscled torso clambering up the rope.   

Harry Baldman

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Too Quiet.
« Reply #2003 on: March 03, 2016, 01:36:39 pm »

Excellent in principle! Too bad that's probably all I had in me for now.

If not, try again! And hit somebody hostile in the process!

If yes, swoop down on one of the climbing beastfolk and try to dislodge it from the climbing rope with a well-timed assault.
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Toaster

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Too Quiet.
« Reply #2004 on: March 03, 2016, 01:42:41 pm »

Use teeth and horn to start cutting ropes!  Or gore anyone who boards.  Yarrrr.
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HMR stands for Hazardous Materials Requisition, not Horrible Massive Ruination, though I can understand how one could get confused.
God help us if we have to agree on pizza toppings at some point. There will be no survivors.

Comrade P.

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Too Quiet.
« Reply #2005 on: March 03, 2016, 02:05:16 pm »

- I WILL ROAST YOUR GUTS, BIRD! AND YOU MOTHERFUCKERS AREN'T SEEING SUNSET!

Wipe bird shit from eyes, make my damn five shots, then go grab a sword and get into rope cutting business or swordfight, whatever is applicable at this point.
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Sigs

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Xantalos

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Too Quiet.
« Reply #2006 on: March 03, 2016, 02:16:58 pm »

"AHAHAHAHA! AND I HAVE PLENTY MORE WHERE THAT CAME FROM!"

So I'm being influenced to have mouth-connected fire abilities, am I? Fitting for how often I spew insults.

I know we have at least a few more bottles of flammable booze stuff or somesuch. Get one of them and try the ol' flamethrower technique on the approaching hostiles. Or take a page from rappers and literally spit fire at them. Whatever my inner pyromaniac thinks is best.
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DoctorMcTaalik

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Too Quiet.
« Reply #2007 on: March 03, 2016, 05:31:43 pm »

Use my 3 functional limbs to scramble back to one of the shelters, and try to snipe attackers from a position of relative safety.
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Egan_BW

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Too Quiet.
« Reply #2008 on: March 03, 2016, 05:42:12 pm »

LOUDER, LOUDER! AND MORE CORRECT! USE THE SKULL TO SING TOO!
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piecewise

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Too Quiet.
« Reply #2009 on: March 07, 2016, 03:18:23 pm »

LOUDER, LOUDER! AND MORE CORRECT! USE THE SKULL TO SING TOO!
[1]
You suddenly feel insanely depressed. To the point of wanting to immediately fling yourself off the warbeast.

So thats what you do.

[6]
You fall 50 feet and end up getting caught in the upper branches of a large tree. Over all, considering you're a glass ball that just fell 50 feet, you're in pretty damn good shape. Here's hoping the beast doesn't step on you very soon.

Use my 3 functional limbs to scramble back to one of the shelters, and try to snipe attackers from a position of relative safety.

You scrabble back into the living quarters and drag one of the beds over to the door, flipping it over and wedging it into place, forming a little barricade. You steady your rifle against the barricade and wait for the invaders.

"AHAHAHAHA! AND I HAVE PLENTY MORE WHERE THAT CAME FROM!"

So I'm being influenced to have mouth-connected fire abilities, am I? Fitting for how often I spew insults.

I know we have at least a few more bottles of flammable booze stuff or somesuch. Get one of them and try the ol' flamethrower technique on the approaching hostiles. Or take a page from rappers and literally spit fire at them. Whatever my inner pyromaniac thinks is best.

[6]
You grab a bottle of the strongest booze left on the beast and take a mouthful of it. The action of sparking your teeth while also spitting is a difficult one, and one that if done wrong could easily ignite the booze while it was still in your mouth. But this time at least, it works quite well. You aim for the ropes, shooting sprays of burning alcohol out from between your teeth. You light several ropes, snapping a few and even lighting a wolfman looking bastard on fire in the process. He burns quite well, falling from the rope and disappearing into the foliage below. The other invaders on the burning ropes either side back down or hurl themselves onto the beast if they are close enough. Most of these fail to catch hold and go plummeting into the trees below, but a few continue to climb.

Your spray of burning spittle has also caught a small area of the deck on fire. The wood is still damp and the fire isn't much more then a smolder for the moment, but it will grow.

- I WILL ROAST YOUR GUTS, BIRD! AND YOU MOTHERFUCKERS AREN'T SEEING SUNSET!

Wipe bird shit from eyes, make my damn five shots, then go grab a sword and get into rope cutting business or swordfight, whatever is applicable at this point.
You get up, spit, curse, spit, wipe your face, spit, curse again, and spit once more. That done, you walk to the railing, aim your pistol and start firing.
[5]
You take aim at the biggest, most dangerous looking boarder still climbing up the lines and pull the trigger. Blood pours up the grip and into the engravings, instantly boiling away. Your burn scars glow and embers lift off your skin. The shot comes out as a streak of red, like a hot poker being swung through darkness. It punches straight through the big invader and several more behind him before hitting the rope and causing the entire thing to ignite and burn to ash in an instant.
[5]
You take aim at the covered area where several of the tow lines are coming from and fire. The bullet comes out as a burning comet, arcing down like a mortar shell and impacting like a 50 lb bomb. The trees, the ropes, the entire area is blown to pieces.
[2]
You fire again, but the bullet fizzles, spraying nothing but hot smoke and ash out of the barrel.

You curse and manually clear the barrel and the dud cartridge, but by the time you're ready to fire again, several invaders have already reached the deck. Hyenankles tosses you a sabre from the crew cabin. You hold the blade in one hand and the pistol in the other. Two rounds left.


Use teeth and horn to start cutting ropes!  Or gore anyone who boards.  Yarrrr.
[4]
You manage to gnaw through one rope before the boarders get to the deck. You charge the nearest one, a 6'5" monstrosity that looks like a cross between a man and a lobster.
[3]
You turn and give him a courageous whack with your tail. But the blow doesn't make it past his citin and he counters with a kick that sends you rolling back across the deck.

Excellent in principle! Too bad that's probably all I had in me for now.

If not, try again! And hit somebody hostile in the process!

If yes, swoop down on one of the climbing beastfolk and try to dislodge it from the climbing rope with a well-timed assault.

[5]
You swoop down on the ones still climbing the few remaining ropes or on the body of the beast itself. You claw and peck and generally harass the shit out of them in that particularly infuriating way only birds are capable of. You dislodge several and injure even more, clawing and pecking at any exposed eyes, bellies or throats. You take solace that even those that you don't dislodge will probably die of infection thanks to your particular dietary and hygiene habits. Such as pissing on yourself to cool off.
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