It's like the static on a video camera when it's broken, or the loud, ear-rending roar of a television picking up ambient signals. There's a throbbing pain behind your head, and you clutch at it and wheeze, feeling like you might throw up, like you might fall over and die at any second. There's a strange hollow feeling in your stomache- no, your heart- no, your head... somewhere. You're losing cohesion. Your soul is drifting away, your body nothing but a meatpuppet, a vessel to carry memories.
Isn't that all you are?
With a sharp crash it all comes back and you rip at tear at your ears, anything to get the sounds to stop. You clench shut your eyes, anything to get the static to stop. There's nothing here. There's nothing here! It's sucking you in like a vacuum, drawing you away, ripping you apart because there's nothing here!
The sound of a pair of car wheels screeching. People shouting. People leaving. There's crimson where there's no color to be seen. Everything is black and white in a world where black and white are stained red.
The static grows more quiet. Drops of blood vanish into the juttering depths below you, dropping through the ground you can't be standing on, because it doesn't exist.
You're going to die here, darling.
Through the fog, images begin to appear. A shield with some strange egg shape on the front.
Don't worry, I can make it better.
"Well now, you don't look to well off. I'm guessing you're experiencing significant pain right now. Your intestines are on the sidewalk. A pity most people here just run away."
He's a liar and a deceiver.
"I'm kind of surprised. She has enormous potential."
"Does she?" He speaks in half truths and Faustian deals - The Devils Duo must not be trusted
"Indeed. And I think she's awake."
You are a sinner.
Suddenly you're on the ground, and there's hot breath in your ear. The nausea and pain in your abdomen reaches a crescendo.
"I can make all of this better, but I need you to do something for me."
You should never have taken that deal.
The static blinks out into something darker than black. It hurts to look at it, but you really don't want to look at the only other thing with you.
Two glassy, crystalline eyes, and a cats mouth.
"Make a wish."
[MAKE A WISH]
[X] I wish my parents still loved me.
[X] I wish I didn't have to hurt like this.
[X] I wish I could have been quicker.
[X] I wish I had more time.
[X] I wish I was stronger than I was.
[X] I wish I could go back and fix this mess.
[X] I wish I had made a little more, and broke a little less.
[X] I wish...
[X] Write in
[RULES]
1) Forum rules apply, obviously.
2) You are always free to take more than one action, assuming they are not mutually exclusive. The order can be determined in your post by the order you choose them. That said, not all actions that are inclusive of each other sync properly, and people may think you're a bit insane if you jump around too much. Treat this as a Role-play, not a comedy.
3) While the MC's personality is determined, to an extent, by your choices, her knowledge is not. Please take this into account.
4) Tasks with a random element or some measure of difficulty will be rolled on a d100. Choices involving these actions will be labeled with a percentage. This is the percentage chance of completing that action. So if [X] Stop crying [2%] is chosen, a d100 is rolled and anything higher than a 98 will be a success.
5) Much like a roguelike, the game cares not a whit for your survival. NPCs play by the same rules you do, and likely want to kill you brutally. If a witch rolls a critical success and you do not, expect to be maimed at the very least, restart from the beginning more likely.
6) If your MC dies by the dice fucking her over, you may petition for a reset to the last success roll. If she dies because you thought you should make a funny joke vote and not label it properly, it's set in stone, and you will restart. From the beginning. Suicide ends the game. Period. Deal with your choices.
7) The caustic world of PMMM fucking hates you and wants you to die. Please act like it.
8/) More rules and amendments may be added at any time I feel like. I'd like not to railroad as much as possible but PMMM has a certain feel to it and to do it justice much of Bay12 humor is probably going to end up hurting people you care about.
9) Label joke votes as [jk], [Q], or [J]. all [X] votes will be taken seriously.
[X] Explain...
[X] "It's nothing to worry about, that it looks and feels a lot worse than it is, that a doctor absolutely said it was fine, and that I just sort of forgot to take it easy."
"Riiight." Evan drawls, looking at the sticky redness dripping from the front of your chest. "The waterfall of blood is horrifying in the extreme, but the doctor said it was nothing to worry about so we're fine."
You flinch at his sarcastic tone, but keep going.
[X] "Also, I'd rather not go into details as it's rather personal and sensitive..."
Helga looks hurt, but nods. Evan just folds his arms and sighs.
[X]" ...and I'm going to need to find a bathroom, go home for a change, or both."
"I will take her," Helga immediately says with conviction.
"I don't-"
"I will take you." Helga being this serious is enough to shut you up as she grips your hand and drags you back towards your house.
"What about me?" Evan deadpans, trailing along behind you. "I am a part of this friendship, aren't I?"
Helga turns, flint in her eye as she stares at him. You flinch again.
"Tell Nurse that Chelsea is home sick. Got sick on way to school. Also, take notes."
"But-"
"Take notes. Chelsea already failing Geometry. Does not know what triangle is. Your job to teach. Get to it." A stab of pain glues your eyes shut for a moment as you hold back tears, so you miss whatever look Helga sent him. All you know is that you hear Evan retreating back towards the school.
"Come. Is time to go." Helga grips your hand a little tighter and almost drags you back down the streets.
It's hard to appreciate Wichita, Kansas right now, partially because it's summertime and you're sweating like a pig, but mostly because your chest is shooting lances of pain throughout your body. Helga keeps looking at you worriedly, and then around the streets, watching for pedestrians you never meet. Your intuition suggests that Tsubey is responsible for that, though you have no idea how.
You're thrown off balance when Helga gives you a firm but gentle shove down an alleyway and spins to face you.
"What really happened, Chelsea? Why lie to me and Evan? What does kitty have to do with it? What is going on? Why are you hurt?" She's almost crying now.
<She got hurt fighting a witch. It's just what Magical Girls do. You could help, you know.>
Tsubey is back.
[Choice Select]
{You may pick any number or all of the available options}
[X] Shut Tsubey up.
[X] Let him talk
[X] Talk to...
[X] Tsubey
[X] About...
[X] Getting hurt
[X] Magical Girls
[X] Helga
[X] Helga
[X] About...
[X] Getting hurt
[X] Magical Girls
[X] Tsubey
[X] Hit it with your flails
[X] The eye [35%]
[ROLL: 49 : FAILURE]
You're a failure. Disgraceful little girl.
You lash out with your flails, but don't have much power. It turns out to be even worse than you thought, when the spiked head of the flail bounces off the eye with a clunk, as if it's made of solid porcelain. You cry out as the witch lifts you up by your broken thigh, and with a violent twist hurls you into a nearby cube.
Like it was going to work anyway
You smack into it solidly, bouncing off and landing in the grass with a gasp of pain. Your leg is completely useless now... Did you think you were special? DID YOU THINK YOU WERE NEEDED?
Can you feel that?
It's still in the witches mouth.YOU WERE NEVER ANYTHING BUT A NUSIANCE. YOU DESERVE THIS.
The pain?
THIS IS[COMBAT]YOUR FAULT
You're going to be sick
[X] Heal your leg [Forfeit all other moves]
[X] Try to hit the witch...
[X] The Face [35%] [Mild]
[X] The body [65%]
[X] The tail [45%]
[X] The leg [25%]
[X] The arm [25%]
And it's not because of your leg.
[X] Flee [45%]
You hate yourself.
[X] Check soul gem
[X] Check Soul Gem
[SOULGEM: 845/1500 : Light Despair]
Oh. You shouldn't have let it get this far.
That's quite a lot. If you were a little better, you might not have had to force it like you will now.
You don't have a lot of magic left... a little less than half. Healing your leg would probably cost you a decent chunk of that too (+250C)...
The Witch slams into the wall beside you, shocking you out of your reverie. You notice a small scratch on it's eye as it rears away; maybe you did more damage than you thought. It comes back again for a second pass...
And hits the wall again so far away from you that you fail to hit it with your flail.
...Did you give it brain damage or something?
It rears back and tries once more to hit you, and you lash out. This time it's headed right towards you...
The Witch slams you up against the wall, disturbingly human mouth gnawing uselessly at you. Your bones creak under the pressure, but you manage to get your flail free.
[ROLL: 85 : SUCCESS]
The flail dances around the edge of the porcelain face and slams into the witches body as you twist out of the way. The witch rolls onto its back, crying in pain.
[COMBAT]
[X] Press the Advantage [45%]
[X] Heal your leg while it rights itself
{X} Roll a Spot Check
[X] Don't Take It
You hesitate. There's a part of you that's afraid to have Helga hate you, a part of you terrified of what she might say. It's illogical, it's dumb, but...
You hesitate.She already hates you
Helgas wish is cut of by a pained scream as the Witch darts down. You hurl your flail, more strength in your arms than ever before, but...
[ROLL: 60 : FAILURE ]
Doesn't it make you want to laugh?
You miss. There's this sickening, teeth-grating crunch as bones are snapped, and the cry turns strangled. You see the Witches whole body move, as if swallowing.She's eating her.
Helga drops to the ground. Her bottom half is missing. It's not missing. It's in the Witches mouth. You watch it chew.
Oh god her legs are gone.
You fall over into the rapidly pooling blood. The Witch looks upward while it swallows, like a demented, twisted mockery of a dinosaur or crocodile. It's drool mixes with the crimson blood, staining the porcelain face a darkening red, while it's strangely human teeth gnash your best friends flesh into unidentifiable strands of muscle and shards of bone. It knows what it's doing. It enjoys your pain.
Helga is on the floor, a shocked expression on her face, staring into the false sky. Her breath is ragged and shallow, halfway between a open, undignified sobbing and pained screaming, but she's otherwise completely silent. Her mouth is moving.
The Witch, with one last swallow, freezes in place, as if savoring the aftertaste of it's meal. And with a sound like someone squeezing a bag of gelatin, the soulless eyes of the Witch snap to meet yours. "I love you."
And it smiles.
And it charges.
And it bites.
You are dead. You have all been dead since the very beginning. Wasn't it only a matter of time since the inevitability of death? The only fight you had left was to fight for another day, another week, but never forever. Eternity was beyond your grasp. It was always beyond your grasp. You're useless, you're stupid, you're pathetic. You'd be pitied if there was any quality about you that was redeeming. Instead you're reviled. Nobody wants to spend time with you. Nobody cares. Who are you? You're a nobody, a useless little girl, a subhuman wretch who doesn't have the decency to kill herself and instead demands that others clothe her, feed her, make her look almost as if she were a functioning member of a society that doesn't need or want a flimsy little bitch like you. Did you really think you could do anything? Did you really think you were capable of making even the slightest difference in the span of time? What does eternity care about a reject that even the most broken, crippled homeless waste of space wouldn't give the time of day. You're untouchable, not because of some high and mighty concept but because nobody in their right mind would want to dirty themselves by your presence. Your face makes your own Mother want to vomit. Small children won't talk to you. Helga hates you, because you were too weak to save her, and now she's in pain, because you were to PATHETIC and WEAK to make even the weakest witch cast a glance in your direction. You should die, and clean the world a little bit. Nobody would care. Nobody would even notice. Not even your parents would put out a missing persons report. They would thank God that the useless, ugly, wailing little piece of shit they had for a daughter was gone. You've known this for a while, Haven't you? Pushing at the back of your mind, insistent that you PAY ATTENTION. That you do something to make yourself worth more than the embryonic fluid you were born in, but instead, you just keep consuming valuable resources worth more than your whole life multiplied five times over. A wretched little girl like you should GO DIE, instead of polluting the air that actual, real human beings breath, instead of tainting the "friendship" you had with Helga with the fact that you weren't worth the crumpled gum wrapper God spat you on. You weren't "friends", you weren't "cool", you were a sycophantic leech that drank from the meager presence of a illegal immigrant, that improved her position only by associating herself with people who shouldn't have even been involved with people at your level. Like a rat, you scavenged the trash and refuse of your betters, but instead of staying in the gutter where you belonged, you latched yourself onto something beautiful, and FUCKING SHAT ALL OVER IT. You were nothing but a vile pile of pus, dressed up in the clothes of normal people like a insect in the silks of a king. You were worthless, you knew it, and yet you still dragged her into your disgusting mess, and now she's DEAD because YOU wanted to feel wanted, and needed. Because you wanted to be something you weren't. Human.
[ROLL: 96 : SUCCESS ]
You dodge. You roll out of the way, the Witch slamming into the ground you were just in. It leaves a small crater, right next to Helga and the growing pool of her blood. You're covered in her blood. You aren't worth it.
"AAAAAAAGHGGGGGGGGGH!"You aren't worth it.
You don't bother spinning up your flails. Instead you just smash it into the Witches ugly, inhuman face.You aren't worth it.
[ROLL: 99 : CRITICAL SUCCESS ]
It smashes through the porcelain like a piston fired from an engine block. Shards of ceramic go flying as you raise your arm and smash it again and again, breaking open it's face so large you can see the brain, a enormous dodecahedron ensnared by a webbing of blood vessels. You aren't worth it.
You rip it out.You aren't worth it.
And then you keep going, eventually abandoning your flails in favor of your own bare hands, heedless of the thrashing of the monster underneath you. You rip and tear out the innards of the witch piece by piece, and you're not done when you red out. You were never worth it.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The cool water mixes with your tears when you come to. Face first in a puddle, you don't have the strength to even lift your face out of the rank water, the mud of the street filtering through your slightly open lips and into your mouth.
You summon the will to look upwards, or rather, towards the other wall of the alley. Where's Helga.
Helga is gone.
Not even a body left behind.
Turning even further, you spot your soul gem glistening on your wrist. Or, it should be glistening. It's a deep black right now, a dark shadow that seems to put out a sort of anti-light, making everything around it seem dimmer, more dismal. A tiny mote of green dances in the very center, as if frightened. You want to smash it.
[SOULGEM: 1498/1500 : GO DIE GO DIE GO DIE GO DIE ]
You also notice the grief seed lying just out of arms reach.You want to smash this too.
Balanced delicately upon it's point, the grief seed spins softly. There's the slightest sound of music emanating from it, so soft that it's hard to hear over the sound of the rain hitting the ground.
You hate it.
You're such an idiot.
[GO DIE GO DIE GO DIE GO DIE]
[X] Grab the Grief Seed
[X] Give Up.
I took a look at the federal gun law and is hilarious (each state has their own laws as well)
An individual 21 years of age or older may acquire a handgun from a dealer federally licensed to sell firearms in the individual's state of residence.
An individual 18 years of age or older may purchase a rifle or shotgun from a federally licensed dealer in any state. However, the applicant may not purchase a pistol gripped long gun that does not have a shoulder stock until he or she is 21 years of age.
For transactions that do not involve federal firearms licensees, such as private transactions, federal law is less strict when it comes to minimum age.
In a private transaction, federal law prohibits the transfer or the sale of a handgun or ammunition, for use only in handguns, to individuals under 18 years of age. Although, there are certain exceptions in federal law, that if met, would allow an individual to transfer a handgun or ammunition, for use only in handguns, to someone under 18 years of age.
There is no federal law concerning minimum age for the transfer or sale of a firearm that is not defined as a handgun, such as rifles, semiautomatic rifles, short-barreled rifles, shotguns, short-barreled shotgun, etc., for transactions that don't involve federal firearms licensees
Apparently, we can legally buy a sniper rifle, if is a private transaction. Is illegal if we try to buy it for a licensed dealer.
LOL
Get to the street.
I took a look at the federal gun law and is hilarious (each state has their own laws as well)
An individual 21 years of age or older may acquire a handgun from a dealer federally licensed to sell firearms in the individual's state of residence.
An individual 18 years of age or older may purchase a rifle or shotgun from a federally licensed dealer in any state. However, the applicant may not purchase a pistol gripped long gun that does not have a shoulder stock until he or she is 21 years of age.
For transactions that do not involve federal firearms licensees, such as private transactions, federal law is less strict when it comes to minimum age.
In a private transaction, federal law prohibits the transfer or the sale of a handgun or ammunition, for use only in handguns, to individuals under 18 years of age. Although, there are certain exceptions in federal law, that if met, would allow an individual to transfer a handgun or ammunition, for use only in handguns, to someone under 18 years of age.
There is no federal law concerning minimum age for the transfer or sale of a firearm that is not defined as a handgun, such as rifles, semiautomatic rifles, short-barreled rifles, shotguns, short-barreled shotgun, etc., for transactions that don't involve federal firearms licensees
Apparently, we can legally buy a sniper rifle, if is a private transaction. Is illegal if we try to buy it for a licensed dealer.
LOL
Get to the street.
God fucking dammit America. Distributing Sniper Rifles to fourteen year old magical girls. THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS.
Now I don't have any valid reason not to turn this into Mahou Shoujo★Sniper-Chan. Besides the fact that you'll have no skill with a rifle and the kick from any proper sniper would probably knock you over the first few times you shoot it.
********************************************************************************
[X] Climb the building
Your fingers are much stronger than they should be. You aren't entirely sure why, but you do feel like you should retrieve your soul gem. At the very least, Tsubey would be very upset if you lost it. And those girls sounded almost sinister in their designs for it, so you jump the first ten feet and latch onto the bottom of a windowsill.
Your feet scrabble for purchase on the bricks and you quickly make your way up the side of the building, a cross somewhere between Spiderman and Altair. It costs you a good five seconds to get up there, but you finally make it.
You see crimson and deep blue rocketing over the rooftops ahead. Those Puella are fast! But you're faster.
Three time track champion and experienced long jumper, you move into action, sprinting to the edge of the building and leaping clear over the next one to land on a roof two buildings away.
The Crimson and the Blue Puella nod at each other and jump in different directions. Damn! Now you'll have to make a choice. You can always turn and chase the other if you sense your Soul gem moving further away, but it'll cost you valuable time...
[CHOICE]
[/b]
[DISTANCE: 130m / 200m]
[X] Follow the Red Puella [50% Risk of lost DISTANCE]
[X] Follow the Blue Magi [50% risk of lost DISTANCE]
[X] Follow the Red Puella [50%]
[ROLL: 74 : SUCCESS ]
You launch yourself off the rooftop towards the Red streak, who drops towards the ground, bouncing through traffic as if it isn't even there.
Tsubey will clean up the front as far as the masquerade goes. A few forgotten memories here or there isn't too bad you suppose, so you follow, a flash of green racing after the red.
You spin and dodge through a forest of sedans, vans and semi-trucks, some parked and some not. It puts you uncomfortably in mind of the situation that forced you to make a wish, but...
You note with a start that you're a millisecond away from eating the grill of a giant dominos semi. You twist to the side, but it still clips you and sends you sprawling. You're up on your feet, already sensing for your gem - there!
You're still closer than you were before, but your soul gem is on the other side of the building in front of you, and moving away fast.
[DISTANCE: 154m / 200m]
[CHOICE]
[X] ---We're going through the building! [???]
[X] ---Up and over! [???]
[X] ---The Alley! [???]
[X] Regenerate your leg
[ROLL: 63 : SURVIVE]
You concentrate on healing your leg. Luckily, your soul gem hovers around the same area. You don't want to think about what would happen to you if you lost it and Kyuubey found out.
It's a patchy job; regeneration isn't really your thing. Anyone could look at the crooked, broken figure you cut and know you're not healthy. But you can run on it (kind of) and stand up (painfully)
You limp around the building in front of you, and find yourself at a dead end of brick walls. There are a few backdoors here... Your soul gem is somewhere below you.
[Distance: 50m / 200m]
CORRUPTION: 385/1500 : +10 Corruption per turn from separation sickness
[CHOICE]
[/b]
[X] Left
[X] Right
[X] Center