so, how your dorfs, and you, explain the daily oddities of a fortress?Dwarves' beards are a living entity, and can move independently of the main booze containment unit.
what are the common beliefs, either at fortress and human level?
as for me i've read somewhere that dorfs smooth stone with their beard, which is quite dwarfy, but i can't figure how they manage to engrave or carve the fortification out the walls
oh, and how about the physiological needs? i've never saw a toilet, but man, anyone know that any dwarf worth his/her beard drink something near his volume in booze everyday
Beards are dwarf DNA and are the actual intelligence of the dwarf.Oh the irony.
Also, ever seen a dwarf using such tools as prongs or a hammer when forging? They use their teeth and faces instead. (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=36256.msg2161120#msg2161120)
Agreed.Also, ever seen a dwarf using such tools as prongs or a hammer when forging? They use their teeth and faces instead. (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=36256.msg2161120#msg2161120)
This is probably the funniest thing I have seen on the boards...
If the beards are the standard work tool, then how do females (in the purest vanilla) do work? You have to add a couple brackets to make females have beards...They use their hair, silly you!
If the beards are the standard work tool, then how do females (in the purest vanilla) do work? You have to add a couple brackets to make females have beards...Obviously, in embarrassment of not having a beard, they attach their hair to their faces, resulting in a "beard" that is attached to the dwarf's head. Said "beard" also can be used as a normal work tool, like a male dwarf's beard.
@IT 900 and Necro: Thanks! I quite enjoyedTo summarize:drawingscribbling it as well. I was snickering like hell while drawing the third dorf panel in particular. Call me mad if you want, but remember that you people can talk about weaponizing babies and laugh at the same time. :P
Also, new theory on how dorfs build walls (and possibly other things).Spoiler (click to show/hide)
They simply gaze at it with that thoughtless smile until it autonomously assembles itself. Even females wear that face all the time, so surely they can do it as well. Different kinds of thoughtless smiles would be required for different jobs, hence the still-remaining professions. Carpenterface, masonface, metalsmithface... You name it, the dorfs have someone who can do it! If the gaze itself fails, they just revert to smashing their chiseled visage into the resistant object, until satisfactory results are achieved.
@IT 900 and Necro: Thanks! I quite enjoyeddrawingscribbling it as well. I was snickering like hell while drawing the third dorf panel in particular. Call me mad if you want, but remember that you people can talk about weaponizing babies and laugh at the same time. :P
Also, new theory on how dorfs build walls (and possibly other things).Spoiler (click to show/hide)
They simply gaze at it with that thoughtless smile until it autonomously assembles itself. Even females wear that face all the time, so surely they can do it as well. Different kinds of thoughtless smiles would be required for different jobs, hence the still-remaining professions. Carpenterface, masonface, metalsmithface... You name it, the dorfs have someone who can do it! If the gaze itself fails, they just revert to smashing their chiseled visage into the resistant object, until satisfactory results are achieved.
Magma Men are the results of dwarves who perished during certain mining accidents and were given a second blessed life by Armok as creatures of the holy magma.No, it's just dwarves. Why do you think they go through all of your doors and into your fort in the most inconvenient manner?
Beards are dwarf DNA and are the actual intelligence of the dwarf.The beards should be smaller, then.
@IT 900 and Necro: Thanks! I quite enjoyedI would've liked it if the third panel was spread over something like three frames, with the view zooming in on the dorf's face until the second-to-last frame where the eyes turn red.drawingscribbling it as well. I was snickering like hell while drawing the third dorf panel in particular. Call me mad if you want, but remember that you people can talk about weaponizing babies and laugh at the same time. :P
Also, new theory on how dorfs build walls (and possibly other things).Spoiler (click to show/hide)
They simply gaze at it with that thoughtless smile until it autonomously assembles itself. Even females wear that face all the time, so surely they can do it as well. Different kinds of thoughtless smiles would be required for different jobs, hence the still-remaining professions. Carpenterface, masonface, metalsmithface... You name it, the dorfs have someone who can do it! If the gaze itself fails, they just revert to smashing their chiseled visage into the resistant object, until satisfactory results are achieved.
You know we can't have a long, mindless stare without some kind of horrifying realization. It also serves to illustrate my point that, deep down inside, all batshit insane alcoholic maniacs are dorfs.Fixed. But it still needs more ma-...
A Dwarf doesn't need chisels or sandpaper, they just use their rock-hard fingers and calloused palms.
It's also common knowledge that goblins capture dwarven children specifically for their ability to deconstruct otherwise invincible constructed walls and floors.Actually, that's just a bonus of
Dwarf hair has much less genetic and information density than DNA or brain nerves, so they actually have to be that long for them to have the intelligence the do have. For them to have human intelligence would require hair that could stretch to the moon and back.Beards are dwarf DNA and are the actual intelligence of the dwarf.The beards should be smaller, then.
Very dorfy.Dwarf hair has much less genetic and information density than DNA or brain nerves, so they actually have to be that long for them to have the intelligence the do have. For them to have human intelligence would require hair that could stretch to the moon and back.Beards are dwarf DNA and are the actual intelligence of the dwarf.The beards should be smaller, then.