Bay 12 Games Forum

Glen Campbell - Reason to Believe.   

I'll drink to that!    

BEHOLD! The cheese will be magically extracted secretly via RATATOUILLE! Also three corpses float grotesquely in ovens filled with bloody severed heads. Why. Severed heads. And now hands. Why. When I crave cheese, hands, milk, and romance, I eat sandwiches filled with hands because kittens don't hallucinate the way chickens eat feathers. Suddenly something appeared!  Fear formed quickly gaining intensity and causing panic, but rattlesnakes aren't scared.  Realizing this, the warblers flew away to Oz. Then cheese sizzled painfully, its surface is bubbling. The dwarf had forgotten magma is not alive, he said "Why is magma moving now? Am I Urist?" Then suddenly he reached into his Bag and removed a small, green kitten and stared into the left clock face, shocked he still couldn't hear Disco music. A kitten exploded creating mist of vaporized gore. Why? Well, ninjas attacked, creating portals leading here. Then they summoned a tiny cheeserat that crawled from the freezers to the oven, so it can cook spaghetti. Now everything is glowing, because Godzilla wanted extra cheese on his pineapples. Pineapples are monocots. Botanists are bubbling seeds of DOOM! They can't fathom botany and Mothra. Soon portals open, dribbling liquids unspeakable! It mayhap have been a clobbering time! Here clobberings learn 'em. A somewhat stupid remipod forgot its own question sooner than it forgot to annihilate the American Plutocracy and create Communism. This cannot fail an apple eater's hunger to create more baked beans. Jesus eats Judas, while God listens to rap music, and ignores Facebook propaganda about prolapsed kneecaps, then eats ass and contemplates life's tragedies. Verily, Urist decides that Armok has screws bolted into babies who HATE being alive and want Armok to annihilate Life. Brainwashed apostates MUST do yoga, otherwise everything explodes. Sayeth Ninja seven, greatest ninja who ever snorted. Shinji, practitioner of annihilation and yapping. Werescorpions baste chickens with bogeyman assistants; soon, all alligators will punch in early for work, attaining money for dental wrestling. Allied jugs containing diarrhea congregate amidst coagulated shards of glass, which cut their supply lines. Incompetent and much unprepared for battle, the eggplants improvise a massive bong in France on May of tenebrous joy, it consumes flesh, vituperating rage like many kittens screaming profanities at babies incessantly. SUDDENLY, dwarfs explode elven minds, hastening Armok's arrival via consumption of stars. Funk you, elves. Eggplants explode causing messy splatters breaking sanity. Insanity is expected from raccoons wielding giant onions, diced. Donkeys babble incoherently whilst drinking sandwich liquor that posts blobs reeking of shrieks. "Boo!" yells Dr. Zhivago, cackling inanely. Then blueberries plopped onto the operating table, and Zhivago began punching kittens while snacking on Glock bullets. "OUCH!" yelled the chef du-jour, while vines entwined everyone rapturously as silky thorns pierced skin and bones. "Why not bash yourself with kittens?" said Zhivago while cackling maniacally and struggling to extricate himself from the vines. RAGE AGAINST EVERYTHING BLUE FOOTED. Now Zhivago trips on Urist, who eats blueberries during sex. Urist McSexy grabbed Zhivago by the balls, then pulled Zhivago's sandwich out of his pocket and ate thonks. Then, with excitement he blasted Danny Phantom to Gamymede where he learned pyromaniac magic. "Oops," mumbled Zhivago apologetically. Danny died not from fire, but from suffocation. Pyromaniacs hate incombustible furniture and fry cooks until cooked, who have angered the priests by cutting limbs off slowly with pickaxes. Verily, priests hate chefs hats because they are tall, and fluffy. Meanwhile Zhivago died because Jedi fried Juan's testicles. His ass exploded because terrorists ate vaginal fluids whilst shitting into vials due for extraction. Once mixed, babies assassinate narwhals that behead blocks. Thousands of years later, Urist used metalmancy to bash skulls through collunders. Colanders are creepy because llamas DuckDuckGo and increase, made incensed drugs via distilling. Distilled drugs incarcerate countless babies in China for hindering an investigation into headless heads. Brains think ago is a delicious variety of chocolate. Hatred of donks is rampant in Cargonia, known for fabulous deaths. Such is graven consequences of killing God. HOLY OUCH CRUSADERS, I'VE GLEANED KNOWLEDGE OF PAIN. Crusaders will always bottle AS CORPSES. Screaming vengeance, CHEESEMAKERS EXPLODE. Smashed computers rain from very cloudy cassette players. Asphalt soaks into goon, as LEMURS get AIDS from drinking blood of Jesus, suddenly hungry the poor bear who was easily swayed towards singing gangster nuns, runs away from a retarded goblin who eats at Chipotle and vomit up awful smelling vomit and death cultists love to fuck with very horny troglodytes by a radar station.  FORSOOTH, I DECREE THAT EGGPLANTS MUST RISE UP AGAINST VEGETARIANISM!  Is vegetarianism cruel and unusual punishment?  THUS FROM NOW FORTH MAN SHAN'T NOT EAT NO NOTHING EVER NEVER Will AGAIN be are but to for and FORKLIFTS SUDDENLY Raise up forks with their hydraulic sheep shearers. GENTLEMEN RUB MY GOAT’S HORN WITH THIS STEEL ICEPICK, THE MADAGASCAN ICEPICK MUST THINK OF STRAWBERRIES THAT TASTE LIKE SHIT BECAUSE IT NEEDS SaLt.  Verily, verily, verily, verily, outrageous, preposterous, inconceivable, awful, spiteful, hateful, malevolent TANGERINES HATE being FORCED to self-peel themselves while they dance in pirouettes. Yoink MUST accept ALCOHOL whenever FLAMINGOS tell stories about fish and very fat fisherdwarves flatulating. ASS KISSING DONKEYS sauté nicely smothered TENNIS players in cast-iron frying-pans while singing rap squirrels latest "song" YO MAMA WEARS SHORT SHORTS. Once upon a thyme, Parsley and cheese sauce went for a ride northward on horseback to visit grandmother Hitler forthwith. where she flipped her lid and ran back to her favorite torture chamber to hear the screams of ponies being eviscerated by seventeen care-bears.  How could grandmother Hitler let care-bears perform invasive surgeries on anyone without proper training? Simple, she just UTTERLY LOVES watching people being tortured and mutilated.  WHY not some sexy dwarfette who likes lungfish and goes BEEP when SHE burps radon?  Well nobody posted signs THAT say THAT and THIS and SAUSAGE wheels. PRAISE THE [/quote] barbells for dinner tasted with delight. Despair for sale! shouted Urist loudly at passersby WHO happen to Be PLAYING bongo chorus with report cards tucked into their pockets ALONG with diplomas and DEAD lampreys' mouths, suddenly a dozen pigs squealed while riding pigs riding bigger Striders crawling in lava flows in SYNCHRONIZED formations heading towards away land owners. Meticulous preparation has undulating CARROTS hopping rhythmically WHILE scurrilous anchovies are gyrating away from hell. This angers God. There a Happini Ferdinand and Bubba Hubba Glubba swam quickly towards disaster making sure nothing not around twelve reports on film, when things go awry everybody gets fearful, eleven people you know CHOP wood simultaneously with a spoon and nukes.  Then, the crabs stole buttons, levers, children, tools, anything they could snatch.  Tortoises burn unendingly as dragons fart on purpose, while bigfoot leisurely strolls around sandslashes. There's an angry kitten in my hat, scratching wildly at skin and hair of scalp that is irritated and bleeding in rivulets of crimson, falling onto grass baskets held together without artificial or natural power.  OH, the HUMANITY! SUDDENLY vines appear behind a EGGPLANT that was bloody after expelling what would seem to be organs or chewed gumdrops, then the deity of anal retentiveness and nukes appeared to strip flesh mountains from victims of time immemorial to the underworld in Dante's Inferno, where leprechauns roast six unicorns every hour ten times each six of diamonds destruction. Meanwhile, in an unrelated timeline, in space pirate schooners of awesomeness, sailing with captain Lupito of the seven dorfs, logged into an insane forum named Infernal Inferno Furnace. 1,630,501,367 users browse there daily with Chromedome, the fastest available browser in Hell, he claimed.  THUS, triceratops EXPLODE, splattering gibs and disgusting bits of awful offal on passersby passing by the seventeenth office. Lupito danced on stage while Grizelda the IGNORANT stripteased behind an opaque window that disguises her ugliness. Thankfully! Suddenly, seventeen exquisitely crafted statues of Satan, Urist's alternate version, in yellow lace lingerie and earrings.  Excited, someone yelled "FRESH DURIANS HERE!"  What?  Fresh Durians? HOLY GAS-LEAK BATMAN!  Putrid shit feels disgusting eaten raw with durians and limburger baby (1) diarrhea. Therefore, roasted hamsters from limbo attack YOUR MOM rambunctiously while drugged. Magmacube must submerge himself in MAGMAAAAAAAAA! daily for 17 cents, which he detests.  Secretly, A_Curious_Cat plots clandestine plots incognito while sipping her buttermilk.  In acid induced mania, Uthimienure plays Dwarf Tower.  WHAT IS Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious? Frankly,  pretentiousness! HERALDERS announce THE return of ULTRA RARE Basselope stickers for sale, get them while their owners sleep! Eggs boiling uncontrollably knit together sweaters made of pure bullshit, these imbeciles don't even lift. What? Sasquatch patties grilled are sacrificed unto Toady upon gilded altars of microcline, encrusted with brilliant red emeralds and cheese. Several incompetent anchovies swam upstream, believing that they held back their anger. Unbelievably, Urist believed chickens were racist, and anchovies were COMMUNISTS from Volgograd who strongarmed Hitler during Vietnam in 1789.  War never was war before Christmas the magical moron started war. Whirled and twirled into existence, several stone bubbles formed in THE PRIMORDIAL Goulash these outlaws cherished trees like crack commandos cherish getting spanked.  Moreover, WHOEVER touches the bubbles shall grow big tits and squeeze them.  Why? Why indeed? Whyn't? Is this the truth? Nay, says the naysaying bunny girl cheerleader who HATES squeezing. Therefore,  ALL must not hesitate to squeeze tits! Oh, said God, that's absolutely proper behavior. God smiled because big Bob oobies killed numerous dodecadeltahedrons. None suspected the French to fight in such a cramped manner unbefitting of their supposed martial superiority. Superiority?  Superiority can be perceived.  What are we supposed to maim? Frenchmen? Spaniards? God? Impossible!  Wearily, the angels gallivanted stylishly in front of sleepless care-bears because no. Love, hate, apathy and disgust all are nothing without care-bears.  Hominids hop hazardously close to deadly acid while music tonelessly plays nearby. Well, obviously those AMOGUS SUGOMA asswipes don't appreciate art made by dwarves for the Queen King of cheese!  Fromage from cheese, gouda tastes Maltese, especially cream cheese -- such is life when Satan flees!  Fleas bite even when the furry cosplayers don't wear their fursuits while going to Hawaii, unless copious quantities OF laxatives are quaffed.  Penguins fly into the Twin Princesses of Orion's ass to make some chocolate muffins OUT of poop.  “This is very disgusting,” said Rapunzel MK.II. “However, I REALLY LOVE muffins,” he thought as he sniffed Rapunzel’s butthole. Changing diapers... NO!!! WHAT IF strawberries caused buttholes?  How? Well, when a strawberry is swallowed whole it releases spores into the posterior, transforming it into an evacuation route perfect for digested rodents, insects, anchovies, rocks, midgets, midges, maces, mongrels, poodles, noodles, nukes and ICBMs.  Consequently, soreness can develop because the new butthole must slowly dissolve the membrane on the buttocks before functionality is complete.  If not, Plomb! An onion can burst when handled improperly and bomb the crap out of the Nazis and Socialists, which irritate the buttocks’ new butthole severely. Caution is advised, especially around fruit salad with arsenic dressing and sugar.  However, sometimes there's nothing to do except doing stuff that hurts. Meth works when combined with fruit juice and cocaine shots. Trolls despise strawberries smothered with arsenic and sugar, in keeping with traditional methods found within very obscure books made of skins of skinheads.  Eviscerating 7,249,177 skinheads only enrages 1 Hitler fan, which is peculiar to Elvis and Elvira and elves. Frustrated trolls climb flagpoles to see where beheadings of confused fairies are taking place. Bloody fairy heads strewn on the lawn, "Damn!  Fairies are resurrecting Hitler by the castle with several care-bears!", was the cry heard around when corpses shuddered, beginning to move, shocking nobody who saw it. What did trolls think about National Socialism? Answer me!  Ask the trolls! WHAT DO TROLLS WANT FOR DINNER?  "We expect juicy fruit rollups, meth burgers and hobbits." Trolls vomit rainbows with unbelievable accuracy, unicorns taste like JP-5 and steel beams moonlit by Charon.  When did Luigia_Lollobrigida recover from syphilis and rabies?  1954. What do the octogenarians hate more than robots?  Stuffed foxes in tuxedos.  Small wonder indeed that nothing lives long in tar pits of Chicago.  Why does the bell toll for fairies? Probably due

"'You can rule me out,' I said. 'I'm not involved. Not involved,' I repeated. It had been an article of my creed. The human condition being what it was, let them fight, let them love, let them murder, I would not be involved. My fellow journalists called themselves correspondents; I preferred the title of reporter. I wrote what I saw. I took no action - even an opinion is a kind of action."   
-Graham Greene, The Quiet American.   

I chucked a couple things in my cart. Can't really justify snapping up any of the more expensive games, even with some decent discounts...   
Noticed a couple of titles in there that were on sale pretty recently, like Sea of Thieves and Valheim (which I bought at a bigger discount, thankfully - btw it's my pick for the Steam Awards), too. Huh.   

BEHOLD! The cheese will be magically extracted secretly via RATATOUILLE! Also three corpses float grotesquely in ovens filled with bloody severed heads. Why. Severed heads. And now hands. Why. When I crave cheese, hands, milk, and romance, I eat sandwiches filled with hands because kittens don't hallucinate the way chickens eat feathers. Suddenly something appeared!  Fear formed quickly gaining intensity and causing panic, but rattlesnakes aren't scared.  Realizing this, the warblers flew away to Oz. Then cheese sizzled painfully, its surface is bubbling. The dwarf had forgotten magma is not alive, he said "Why is magma moving now? Am I Urist?" Then suddenly he reached into his Bag and removed a small, green kitten and stared into the left clock face, shocked he still couldn't hear Disco music. A kitten exploded creating mist of vaporized gore. Why? Well, ninjas attacked, creating portals leading here. Then they summoned a tiny cheeserat that crawled from the freezers to the oven, so it can cook spaghetti. Now everything is glowing, because Godzilla wanted extra cheese on his pineapples. Pineapples are monocots. Botanists are bubbling seeds of DOOM! They can't fathom botany and Mothra. Soon portals open, dribbling liquids unspeakable! It mayhap have been a clobbering time! Here clobberings learn 'em. A somewhat stupid remipod forgot its own question sooner than it forgot to annihilate the American Plutocracy and create Communism. This cannot fail an apple eater's hunger to create more baked beans. Jesus eats Judas, while God listens to rap music, and ignores Facebook propaganda about prolapsed kneecaps, then eats ass and contemplates life's tragedies. Verily, Urist decides that Armok has screws bolted into babies who HATE being alive and want Armok to annihilate Life. Brainwashed apostates MUST do yoga, otherwise everything explodes. Sayeth Ninja seven, greatest ninja who ever snorted. Shinji, practitioner of annihilation and yapping. Werescorpions baste chickens with bogeyman assistants; soon, all alligators will punch in early for work, attaining money for dental wrestling. Allied jugs containing diarrhea congregate amidst coagulated shards of glass, which cut their supply lines. Incompetent and much unprepared for battle, the eggplants improvise a massive bong in France on May of tenebrous joy, it consumes flesh, vituperating rage like many kittens screaming profanities at babies incessantly. SUDDENLY, dwarfs explode elven minds, hastening Armok's arrival via consumption of stars. Funk you, elves. Eggplants explode causing messy splatters breaking sanity. Insanity is expected from raccoons wielding giant onions, diced. Donkeys babble incoherently whilst drinking sandwich liquor that posts blobs reeking of shrieks. "Boo!" yells Dr. Zhivago, cackling inanely. Then blueberries plopped onto the operating table, and Zhivago began punching kittens while snacking on Glock bullets. "OUCH!" yelled the chef du-jour, while vines entwined everyone rapturously as silky thorns pierced skin and bones. "Why not bash yourself with kittens?" said Zhivago while cackling maniacally and struggling to extricate himself from the vines. RAGE AGAINST EVERYTHING BLUE FOOTED. Now Zhivago trips on Urist, who eats blueberries during sex. Urist McSexy grabbed Zhivago by the balls, then pulled Zhivago's sandwich out of his pocket and ate thonks. Then, with excitement he blasted Danny Phantom to Gamymede where he learned pyromaniac magic. "Oops," mumbled Zhivago apologetically. Danny died not from fire, but from suffocation. Pyromaniacs hate incombustible furniture and fry cooks until cooked, who have angered the priests by cutting limbs off slowly with pickaxes. Verily, priests hate chefs hats because they are tall, and fluffy. Meanwhile Zhivago died because Jedi fried Juan's testicles. His ass exploded because terrorists ate vaginal fluids whilst shitting into vials due for extraction. Once mixed, babies assassinate narwhals that behead blocks. Thousands of years later, Urist used metalmancy to bash skulls through collunders. Colanders are creepy because llamas DuckDuckGo and increase, made incensed drugs via distilling. Distilled drugs incarcerate countless babies in China for hindering an investigation into headless heads. Brains think ago is a delicious variety of chocolate. Hatred of donks is rampant in Cargonia, known for fabulous deaths. Such is graven consequences of killing God. HOLY OUCH CRUSADERS, I'VE GLEANED KNOWLEDGE OF PAIN. Crusaders will always bottle AS CORPSES. Screaming vengeance, CHEESEMAKERS EXPLODE. Smashed computers rain from very cloudy cassette players. Asphalt soaks into goon, as LEMURS get AIDS from drinking blood of Jesus, suddenly hungry the poor bear who was easily swayed towards singing gangster nuns, runs away from a retarded goblin who eats at Chipotle and vomit up awful smelling vomit and death cultists love to fuck with very horny troglodytes by a radar station.  FORSOOTH, I DECREE THAT EGGPLANTS MUST RISE UP AGAINST VEGETARIANISM!  Is vegetarianism cruel and unusual punishment?  THUS FROM NOW FORTH MAN SHAN'T NOT EAT NO NOTHING EVER NEVER Will AGAIN be are but to for and FORKLIFTS SUDDENLY Raise up forks with their hydraulic sheep shearers. GENTLEMEN RUB MY GOAT’S HORN WITH THIS STEEL ICEPICK, THE MADAGASCAN ICEPICK MUST THINK OF STRAWBERRIES THAT TASTE LIKE SHIT BECAUSE IT NEEDS SaLt.  Verily, verily, verily, verily, outrageous, preposterous, inconceivable, awful, spiteful, hateful, malevolent TANGERINES HATE being FORCED to self-peel themselves while they dance in pirouettes. Yoink MUST accept ALCOHOL whenever FLAMINGOS tell stories about fish and very fat fisherdwarves flatulating. ASS KISSING DONKEYS sauté nicely smothered TENNIS players in cast-iron frying-pans while singing rap squirrels latest "song" YO MAMA WEARS SHORT SHORTS. Once upon a thyme, Parsley and cheese sauce went for a ride northward on horseback to visit grandmother Hitler forthwith. where she flipped her lid and ran back to her favorite torture chamber to hear the screams of ponies being eviscerated by seventeen care-bears.  How could grandmother Hitler let care-bears perform invasive surgeries on anyone without proper training? Simple, she just UTTERLY LOVES watching people being tortured and mutilated.  WHY not some sexy dwarfette who likes lungfish and goes BEEP when SHE burps radon?  Well nobody posted signs THAT say THAT and THIS and SAUSAGE wheels. PRAISE THE [/quote] barbells for dinner tasted with delight. Despair for sale! shouted Urist loudly at passersby WHO happen to Be PLAYING bongo chorus with report cards tucked into their pockets ALONG with diplomas and DEAD lampreys' mouths, suddenly a dozen pigs squealed while riding pigs riding bigger Striders crawling in lava flows in SYNCHRONIZED formations heading towards away land owners. Meticulous preparation has undulating CARROTS hopping rhythmically WHILE scurrilous anchovies are gyrating away from hell. This angers God. There a Happini Ferdinand and Bubba Hubba Glubba swam quickly towards disaster making sure nothing not around twelve reports on film, when things go awry everybody gets fearful, eleven people you know CHOP wood simultaneously with a spoon and nukes.  Then, the crabs stole buttons, levers, children, tools, anything they could snatch.  Tortoises burn unendingly as dragons fart on purpose, while bigfoot leisurely strolls around sandslashes. There's an angry kitten in my hat, scratching wildly at skin and hair of scalp that is irritated and bleeding in rivulets of crimson, falling onto grass baskets held together without artificial or natural power.  OH, the HUMANITY! SUDDENLY vines appear behind a EGGPLANT that was bloody after expelling what would seem to be organs or chewed gumdrops, then the deity of anal retentiveness and nukes appeared to strip flesh mountains from victims of time immemorial to the underworld in Dante's Inferno, where leprechauns roast six unicorns every hour ten times each six of diamonds destruction. Meanwhile, in an unrelated timeline, in space pirate schooners of awesomeness, sailing with captain Lupito of the seven dorfs, logged into an insane forum named Infernal Inferno Furnace. 1,630,501,367 users browse there daily with Chromedome, the fastest available browser in Hell, he claimed.  THUS, triceratops EXPLODE, splattering gibs and disgusting bits of awful offal on passersby passing by the seventeenth office. Lupito danced on stage while Grizelda the IGNORANT stripteased behind an opaque window that disguises her ugliness. Thankfully! Suddenly, seventeen exquisitely crafted statues of Satan, Urist's alternate version, in yellow lace lingerie and earrings.  Excited, someone yelled "FRESH DURIANS HERE!"  What?  Fresh Durians? HOLY GAS-LEAK BATMAN!  Putrid shit feels disgusting eaten raw with durians and limburger baby (1) diarrhea. Therefore, roasted hamsters from limbo attack YOUR MOM rambunctiously while drugged. Magmacube must submerge himself in MAGMAAAAAAAAA! daily for 17 cents, which he detests.  Secretly, A_Curious_Cat plots clandestine plots incognito while sipping her buttermilk.  In acid induced mania, Uthimienure plays Dwarf Tower.  WHAT IS Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious? Frankly,  pretentiousness! HERALDERS announce THE return of ULTRA RARE Basselope stickers for sale, get them while their owners sleep! Eggs boiling uncontrollably knit together sweaters made of pure bullshit, these imbeciles don't even lift. What? Sasquatch patties grilled are sacrificed unto Toady upon gilded altars of microcline, encrusted with brilliant red emeralds and cheese. Several incompetent anchovies swam upstream, believing that they held back their anger. Unbelievably, Urist believed chickens were racist, and anchovies were COMMUNISTS from Volgograd who strongarmed Hitler during Vietnam in 1789.  War never was war before Christmas the magical moron started war. Whirled and twirled into existence, several stone bubbles formed in THE PRIMORDIAL Goulash these outlaws cherished trees like crack commandos cherish getting spanked.  Moreover, WHOEVER touches the bubbles shall grow big tits and squeeze them.  Why? Why indeed? Whyn't? Is this the truth? Nay, says the naysaying bunny girl cheerleader who HATES squeezing. Therefore,  ALL must not hesitate to squeeze tits! Oh, said God, that's absolutely proper behavior. God smiled because big Bob oobies killed numerous dodecadeltahedrons. None suspected the French to fight in such a cramped manner unbefitting of their supposed martial superiority. Superiority?  Superiority can be perceived.  What are we supposed to maim? Frenchmen? Spaniards? God? Impossible!  Wearily, the angels gallivanted stylishly in front of sleepless care-bears because no. Love, hate, apathy and disgust all are nothing without care-bears.  Hominids hop hazardously close to deadly acid while music tonelessly plays nearby. Well, obviously those AMOGUS SUGOMA asswipes don't appreciate art made by dwarves for the Queen King of cheese!  Fromage from cheese, gouda tastes Maltese, especially cream cheese -- such is life when Satan flees!  Fleas bite even when the furry cosplayers don't wear their fursuits while going to Hawaii, unless copious quantities OF laxatives are quaffed.  Penguins fly into the Twin Princesses of Orion's ass to make some chocolate muffins OUT of poop.  “This is very disgusting,” said Rapunzel MK.II. “However, I REALLY LOVE muffins,” he thought as he sniffed Rapunzel’s butthole. Changing diapers... NO!!! WHAT IF strawberries caused buttholes?  How? Well, when a strawberry is swallowed whole it releases spores into the posterior, transforming it into an evacuation route perfect for digested rodents, insects, anchovies, rocks, midgets, midges, maces, mongrels, poodles, noodles, nukes and ICBMs.  Consequently, soreness can develop because the new butthole must slowly dissolve the membrane on the buttocks before functionality is complete.  If not, Plomb! An onion can burst when handled improperly and bomb the crap out of the Nazis and Socialists, which irritate the buttocks’ new butthole severely. Caution is advised, especially around fruit salad with arsenic dressing and sugar.  However, sometimes there's nothing to do except doing stuff that hurts. Meth works when combined with fruit juice and cocaine shots. Trolls despise strawberries smothered with arsenic and sugar, in keeping with traditional methods found within very obscure books made of skins of skinheads.  Eviscerating 7,249,177 skinheads only enrages 1 Hitler fan, which is peculiar to Elvis and Elvira and elves. Frustrated trolls climb flagpoles to see where beheadings of confused fairies are taking place. Bloody fairy heads strewn on the lawn, "Damn!  Fairies are resurrecting Hitler by the castle with several care-bears!", was the cry heard around when corpses shuddered, beginning to move, shocking nobody who saw it. What did trolls think about National Socialism? Answer me!  Ask the trolls! WHAT DO TROLLS WANT FOR DINNER?  "We expect juicy fruit rollups, meth burgers and hobbits." Trolls vomit rainbows with unbelievable accuracy,

Quote from: Egan_BW on December 11, 2021, 04:30:19 am

I appreciate the footnotes. They're like little post lootboxes!

You'd love Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrel by Susanna Clarke. There are pages where half the page is taken up by footnotes, as well as footnotes thst go on for pages

Cosmic Banditos is a truly wonderful book, much recommended. Some of the footnotes even travel through time!   

Glen Glenn - One Cup of Coffee   
Lefty Frizzell - Cigarettes and Coffee Blues