Bay 12 Games Forum

Finally... => General Discussion => Topic started by: Neonivek on March 16, 2017, 07:37:13 am

Title: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Neonivek on March 16, 2017, 07:37:13 am
Ok so you wake up one day and are given a box.

Inside this box is the cure for cancer. You have enough doses for a thousand people... and there is a series of books inside this box that teach you how to make and produce it inexpensively. Though they are written in a very thick scientific and medical jargon making it nearly impossible for ordinary people to read.

As well the cure is a magic bullet having absolutely no downsides and curing relatively quickly.

For the sake of this hypothetical... For whatever reason you KNOW the above information to be true.

So how do you manage to get this cure on the market as soon as possible using ONLY the resources you have right now at your disposal.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: You have the cure for cancer. What do you do?
Post by: Frumple on March 16, 2017, 07:43:17 am
Step one: Photocopy/transcribe the books to a digital medium.
Step two: Post that shit online any and every where you can.
Step three: Figure out the rest later.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: You have the cure for cancer. What do you do?
Post by: Loud Whispers on March 16, 2017, 07:44:50 am
I call friends whose trades are medicine and pharmacy, have them determine whether these cures have any merit to their claims and also who is the author of the cure or who its publisher is. Confirming that the cure is genuine, take up a loan or sell my house to fund clinical trial testing of the miracle cure. With the cure showing its success, with its production process being inexpensive, its proliferation would be pretty huge once its results would be known and the instructions for its production would be made public to scientific researchers. I feel that being able to show people verifiable proof that the cure works before putting the information online would be more useful than simply putting the information online

Also just to make sure that this isn't a ruse and won't just turn into I am Legend
Title: Re: Hypothetical: You have the cure for cancer. What do you do?
Post by: Loud Whispers on March 16, 2017, 09:00:45 am
inb4 suicided with two bullets to the back of the head
Title: Re: Hypothetical: You have the cure for cancer. What do you do?
Post by: FallacyofUrist on March 16, 2017, 09:14:48 am
Yeah. Put it on the internet... and in case the government tries to suppress or shut it up, also send it to Wikileaks.

Also make a blog where you demonstrate the cure's effectiveness on 1000 people, one a day, and become a public figure so your assassination will promote your cause.
~~~
This is now the hypothetical scenarios thread. Any objections?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: You have the cure for cancer. What do you do?
Post by: Antioch on March 16, 2017, 09:19:24 am
Contact a Patent lawyer.

Apply for patent.

Contact investors.

Hold trials.

Market cure.

Make millions worth of profit while saving the world.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: You have the cure for cancer. What do you do?
Post by: Neonivek on March 16, 2017, 03:33:00 pm
This is now the hypothetical scenarios thread. Any objections?

Nope none.

Though I do find it funny that for the MOST part... there is nothing you can really do.

How the heck you even co-ordinate people getting cured of cancer is beyond me. "Here take this unknown drug!"

But the internet solution is interesting and kind of works. It would take a while but a LOT faster than any alternative I can think of.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do?
Post by: helmacon on March 16, 2017, 04:01:51 pm
New Hypothetical Situation.

You, and only you have access to a specific machine.

The machine will permanently remove major obstacles to human civilization, but for a price.

The options are
1. - permanently remove the ability for diseases to develop antibiotic resistances (and remove all current medical resistances)
2. - humanity is provided with an infrastructure system and detailed schematics for the building and operation of fusion power generation plants.
3. - Remove all national distinctions and cultural tensions (unite the world)

Each option you choose will result in the spontaneous death of 1/3 of the world's population. (you are excluded)
You may substitute your life in payment for one of the options.

No one will ever know about your access to the machine and the decisions you make.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: You have the cure for cancer. What do you do?
Post by: ChairmanPoo on March 16, 2017, 04:02:06 pm
Contact a Patent lawyer.

Apply for patent.

Contact investors.

Hold trials.

Market cure.

Make millions worth of profit while saving the world.
Contact a Patent lawyer.

Apply for patent.

Sell patent to major pharmaceutical company.

Make millions worth of profit while saving the world.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Neonivek on March 16, 2017, 04:02:58 pm
Yeah but don't you need to prove you have the cure for cancer before people will invest?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Strife26 on March 16, 2017, 04:13:04 pm
Yeah but don't you need to prove you have the cure for cancer before people will invest?

Nah, that's the beauty of modern venture capitalism. You just need to find someone in the right area to go in with you (hint: I'm totally in silicon valley and would take equity in return for my time and experience).
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MetalSlimeHunt on March 16, 2017, 04:21:55 pm
-Cancer-
I'll combine the patent plan with the mass publication plan. First, learn enough about the cure that I can basically explain how it works, and use this knowledge to clandestinely persuade the parents of local child cancer patients that I'm for real. Use my patent ownership to terrorize outlets and force them to provide at a reasonable price, ala Ben Franklin. I will also publish my identity with the cure and immediately afterward head down to the children's hospital and distribute the originals to terminal cases on camera. Do as many interviews as possible to avoid getting blackbagged, claim I invented it in my house on accident (not untrue, in a Jedi sense).

Get rich off of publicity and go to a famous medical school. Also get a publicist, that's probably important. Later, launch a political campaign in which I ominously refer to myself as "The Cure" and exterminate humanity in a nuclear holocaust support the space program. Yes. That's what I meant.

Oh yeah, and empirically prove the existence of the supernatural at some point since what the fuck where did this box come from.
The machine will permanently remove major obstacles to human civilization, but for a price.

The options are
1. - permanently remove the ability for diseases to develop antibiotic resistances (and remove all current medical resistances)
2. - humanity is provided with an infrastructure system and detailed schematics for the building and operation of fusion power generation plants.
3. - Remove all national distinctions and cultural tensions (unite the world)

Each option you choose will result in the spontaneous death of 1/3 of the world's population. (you are excluded)
You may substitute your life in payment for one of the options.
This is clearly a malicious genie scenario. The first option will create biological symmetry and cause the extinction of all life, the second option will make us blow ourselves up and destroy civilization, and the third option will suck up everybody's souls into a giant red sphere in orbit and destroy individuality. Any of the options will assist these forms of destruction by the chaos of causing mass death, and me dying instead is to prevent me from telling anybody about the danger if there isn't mass death.

Do nothing and shout racist obscenities against aliens at the sky.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do?
Post by: FallacyofUrist on March 17, 2017, 09:55:39 am
New Hypothetical Situation.

You, and only you have access to a specific machine.

The machine will permanently remove major obstacles to human civilization, but for a price.

The options are
1. - permanently remove the ability for diseases to develop antibiotic resistances (and remove all current medical resistances)
2. - humanity is provided with an infrastructure system and detailed schematics for the building and operation of fusion power generation plants.
3. - Remove all national distinctions and cultural tensions (unite the world)

Each option you choose will result in the spontaneous death of 1/3 of the world's population. (you are excluded)
You may substitute your life in payment for one of the options.

No one will ever know about your access to the machine and the decisions you make.
3 doesn't appeal to me. What of the many benefits of cultural diversity?
1 is nice, but is much more of a long-term benefit that few people would notice right away.
That leaves 2, which I would go with... in a bit. As an old man, I would sacrifice my own life to activate two, assuming humanity hasn't achieved fusion power by then.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do?
Post by: McTraveller on March 17, 2017, 10:07:57 am
New Hypothetical Situation.

You, and only you have access to a specific machine.

The machine will permanently remove major obstacles to human civilization, but for a price.

The options are
1. - permanently remove the ability for diseases to develop antibiotic resistances (and remove all current medical resistances)
2. - humanity is provided with an infrastructure system and detailed schematics for the building and operation of fusion power generation plants.
3. - Remove all national distinctions and cultural tensions (unite the world)

Each option you choose will result in the spontaneous death of 1/3 of the world's population. (you are excluded)
You may substitute your life in payment for one of the options.

No one will ever know about your access to the machine and the decisions you make.
Number 3, and probably sacrifice myself to do it.

Number 1: death is actually important for ecology, so I wouldn't touch this one.
Number 2: Too easily abused by "the powers that be"
Number 3: the only one that stands a chance of actually improving things.  Also, as a side effect, if you do number 3, you probably get number 2 and at least effective treatment methods for number 1 along with it, since everyone is apparently now cooperating instead of fighting.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do?
Post by: Frumple on March 17, 2017, 10:45:46 am
3 doesn't appeal to me. What of the many benefits of cultural diversity?
Presumably the magic genocide box maintains the diversity, just gets rid of the tension and borders and similar such messes. All the benefits of cultural diversity without the xenophobia and murder.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Neonivek on March 17, 2017, 11:35:25 am
My issue with the third option is you are kind of messing with people's minds.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Baffler on March 17, 2017, 11:56:55 am
"National distinctions" makes me think it means just making everyone the same grey goo. That's not a good thing.

I think I'd take 1/3 to pay for the first one, then kill myself to pay for the second. The first is probably less people dying than if I hadn't pressed it, and the second one I'll pay for because while it'll probably still save more lives than pressing the button takes that's too many people dying when it can be bought much more cheaply. I'd probably wait to press it though, in case a solution to either of those problems ends up being developed on its own.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: helmacon on March 17, 2017, 02:19:45 pm
3 doesn't appeal to me. What of the many benefits of cultural diversity?
Presumably the magic genocide box maintains the diversity, just gets rid of the tension and borders and similar such messes. All the benefits of cultural diversity without the xenophobia and murder.
This

Quote
Number 1: death is actually important for ecology, so I wouldn't touch this one.
This dosent mean that diseases stop existing, or killing other organisms. It dosent affect natural immune responses and stuff, just antibiotics. Basically, it just means that when we try to treat something it will usually be successful.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on March 17, 2017, 03:00:04 pm
Here's a new hypothetical:
You have a briefcase. It appeared on your bed(or equivalent) this morning, out of nowhere. In the briefcase are 5 vials, a million dollars, and a note.
The note explains that you've been chosen to prepare humanity for the impending apocalypse. In 5 years, an alien invasion will begin. You're expected to mobilize and unite humanity to be as ready as possible for this threat, the nature of which is currently unknown to you.
The note also explains that the vials grant psionic powers to anybody that drinks one, drinking a second will temporarily supercharge one's powers to the point of being a one-man army, but a third will be lethal.

What do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Frumple on March 17, 2017, 03:08:47 pm
... depends on what "psionic powers" entails, really. There's conceptualizations of the stuff that could get some folks together, spend five years cracking open something like a wormhole, and then move the planet to another galaxy or whatev'. Or hide the solar system or somethin'. Or use the vial granted junk to forcibly enable the rest of the species to use the stuff, and then tap a few (hundred) million psionics to do... whatever, probably. The list just kinda' trundles its way into the distance. Indefinite space magic is indefinite.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Neonivek on March 17, 2017, 03:12:01 pm
I feel like I don't really have enough information here.

Psionic powers means little... and "Supercharged" lacks context.

As well FRANKLY... if aliens did invade... I don't think even super charged psionic powers would help much.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: McTraveller on March 17, 2017, 03:15:29 pm
Here's a new hypothetical:
You have a briefcase. It appeared on your bed(or equivalent) this morning, out of nowhere. In the briefcase are 5 vials, a million dollars, and a note.

You'd probably have to try at least one vial on yourself in order to convince people that they actually grant psionic powers.

So assuming you had the psionic powers, you will earn far more than $1M by using the psi powers for something, so the money is kind of... meh? I guess you could use it to pay your bills why you try to establish whatever psi power business you were doing.

There are some serious questions though - if the vials are from the alien force, they are already beyond humanity so I'd just live it up for the next 5 years - it's not like we'll be able to do anything to stop them, right, even with the psi powers - you'd have to assume all the aliens have them too?  If the vials are *not* from the alien force, from whom are they? And who cares?

Or is it some kind of goofy "hah we was just testing humanity, bro!" kind of thing?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on March 17, 2017, 03:16:57 pm
Psionic powers: initially weak(small scale), but grow with time, eventually capping at "I can blow up Hawaii" range, though this would take at least a decade. All psionics users get some basic abilities(telekinesis, extrasensory perception, telepathy), and one special ability that can be just about anything. It's possible to give other people psionics without the vials, but this is time consuming(1 year to awaken 1 person).
~~~
Aliens: You aren't told what the aliens are, but you are told that they're fightable. They aren't "ascended" types that could, say, destroy the entire human resistance in a day with a single shot of a doom laser.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Draignean on March 17, 2017, 03:17:31 pm
Hypothetical:

You've found a formula that proves P = NP.

What do you do?

For reference, solving the P=NP problem would allow certain algorithms to run millions of times faster, enable the prediction of protein folding, and provide a quantum leap forward in computation.

It would also invalidate all current non air-gapped software security systems and would tear through encryption like it didn't exist.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MetalSlimeHunt on March 17, 2017, 03:18:46 pm
World conquest, obviously.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on March 17, 2017, 04:27:04 pm
Here's a new hypothetical:
You have a briefcase. It appeared on your bed(or equivalent) this morning, out of nowhere. In the briefcase are 5 vials, a million dollars, and a note.
The note explains that you've been chosen to prepare humanity for the impending apocalypse. In 5 years, an alien invasion will begin. You're expected to mobilize and unite humanity to be as ready as possible for this threat, the nature of which is currently unknown to you.
The note also explains that the vials grant psionic powers to anybody that drinks one, drinking a second will temporarily supercharge one's powers to the point of being a one-man army, but a third will be lethal.

What do?
Steep by step plan:
1:Drink one vial
2:Keep another vial as backup
3:Choose  three liutenaunts of fanatical loyalty
4:the same thing we do every night Pinky...
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: misko27 on March 17, 2017, 05:33:36 pm
With regards to the early question, I feel like my first action would be to hire a lawyer. Or an intern. Or something.

I feel like most of the people (Loud Whispers excluded) here forget that you have to prove that your cure actually cures cancer before anyone believes a word out of your damn mouth. Anyone (and everyone) who claims they have cures for cancer get ignored. You shout that out loud, you're basically guaranteeing that people will never believe you. I mean what is to distinguish you from literally every other crazy in existence? And what would your story be? "Oh, I just found it somewhere". Yeah, sure random people find miracle cures all the time. People would ignore you straight up. It's not easy even to get so famous as to even get invited to some medical lab to get proven false. I mean if someone walks up to you and claims they've got the cure for cancer and want to cure your sick kid, you don't trust this fucker one bit. And as for publishing it on the internet, how useful is that? At best it's relatively simple to cook up, but then you are just relying on people sick with cancer making some spooky looking concoction that some half-ass image set on imgur is telling them works. And even if they do it, there's no guarantee they tell people about it. And if it's not very easy to make, you are depending on some medical student somewhere someday deciding to cook up a random recipe on the internet. Yeah. Bad idea. So bloody G-Men coming in and abducting you should be the bottom of your worry list until at least one other human being believes you.

3 doesn't appeal to me. What of the many benefits of cultural diversity?
Presumably the magic genocide box maintains the diversity, just gets rid of the tension and borders and similar such messes. All the benefits of cultural diversity without the xenophobia and murder.
This
It's kinda funny to say "Oh yeah it preserves diversity without bloodshed and is great and all" while at the same time killing 2.3 Billion people.

Why do people assume that the magic-murder-genie-box people have our best interests at heart? I mean seriously.
Here's a new hypothetical:
You have a briefcase. It appeared on your bed(or equivalent) this morning, out of nowhere. In the briefcase are 5 vials, a million dollars, and a note.
The note explains that you've been chosen to prepare humanity for the impending apocalypse. In 5 years, an alien invasion will begin. You're expected to mobilize and unite humanity to be as ready as possible for this threat, the nature of which is currently unknown to you.
The note also explains that the vials grant psionic powers to anybody that drinks one, drinking a second will temporarily supercharge one's powers to the point of being a one-man army, but a third will be lethal.

What do?
Ideally? Take over the world. Barring that? Use it to convince certain world leaders (or potential world leaders, who could be world leaders if given phenomenal power) to obey my will long enough to worry about da aliums. Five years isn't a lot of time though. It'll take five years at least to thoroughly cement my grasp on power, and buildup, itself, would take much longer. Hmm. Five years is a short period of time. In the interests of time, I'd develop my abilities to allow me to subliminally message large sections of the population; which I will use to whip them into an angry frenzy demanding more militarization and fear of aliens (if people without psychic powers can do this, surely a psychic person has the power to kick it into overdrive). No matter what I'd ideally like to keep one vial for research purposes.

Failing all this, pull a Watchman.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on March 17, 2017, 06:21:23 pm
Here's a new hypothetical:
You have a briefcase. It appeared on your bed(or equivalent) this morning, out of nowhere. In the briefcase are 5 vials, a million dollars, and a note.
The note explains that you've been chosen to prepare humanity for the impending apocalypse. In 5 years, an alien invasion will begin. You're expected to mobilize and unite humanity to be as ready as possible for this threat, the nature of which is currently unknown to you.
The note also explains that the vials grant psionic powers to anybody that drinks one, drinking a second will temporarily supercharge one's powers to the point of being a one-man army, but a third will be lethal.

What do?
Drink one vial and start training magical healing. When invasion comes, chug the other four vials and use my newfound godly power to keep myself from dying to overdose. Vaporize ayylmaos.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MetalSlimeHunt on March 17, 2017, 06:30:35 pm
I mean if someone walks up to you and claims they've got the cure for cancer and want to cure your sick kid, you don't trust this fucker one bit.
If you're referring to my plan, I was going to emotionally manipulate the parents of terminal cases. People try to use homeopathy and autism cures, the desperate will believe anything. Or at least one of them will, which is all I really need.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do?
Post by: Folly on March 17, 2017, 09:40:30 pm
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

1 and 2, humanity would be better off in the short-term, but worse in the long term. We need to figure out how to solve these problems for ourselves so that we will be prepared to tackle the problems that come after.
3, that would just make the world boring.

That being said, as long as I am excluded from the spontaneous death clause, I would arrange for the general population to vote on what to do with the machine. Sheep do love their democracies, and I might be briefly entertained by the resulting shitstorm.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Frumple on March 17, 2017, 10:24:37 pm
I feel like most of the people (Loud Whispers excluded) here forget that you have to prove that your cure actually cures cancer before anyone believes a word out of your damn mouth.
Completely irrelevant to the primary reason you immediately back up and disseminate the information necessary to create the cure to as many places as possible, in whatever format is easiest to continue to propagate. Point of as immediate as possible and public publishing is entirely so there's little to no chance mankind loses it. You can work out the rest of it once it's in several dozen different servers and it's not going to functionally disappear if you get hit by a truck or some shit while you're working on whatever step 3 is.

Seriously, most of the folks talking about trials and testing appear to be forgetting they're holding a cure to goddamn cancer in their hands in this scenario, and so far as they're aware the sole copy thereof. You don't squirrel that shit away while you're trying to convince people it works, you make as many copies as you can and put them in as many places as you can and worry about the rest once losing the original doesn't mean losing it entirely. You can't convince friggin' anyone you have a cure if the information burns up in a house fire and whatever physical backups you have go to pot for whatever reason. One backup isn't enough for something like that. Several isn't, either. Several dozen spread across the globe and you're getting where you probably should be for something that important.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Azzuro on March 18, 2017, 02:13:59 am
2edgy4u answer: destroy the all the cures, the documentation and all evidence that it ever existed. Cancer's most significant risk factor is age, and it's the leading cause of death in the developed world (admittedly second in developing countries). If you publish the cure, life expectancy will shoot up, but primarily in the first world, leading to worsening global income inequality between the longer-lived upper class with higher incidence of cancer versus the shorter-lived lower class, who still suffer from malaria, tuberculosis, pneumonia et al.

That's not even considering the fact that we're heading toward climate catastrophe, and increasing life expectancy inevitably means increasing consumption and pollution drastically, possibly enough to counteract all our climate accords so far (the vast majority of which are measured per capita and thus near-useless if life expectancy and thus population growth were to increase drastically). You could argue that people living longer means that they'll be more concerned with the future state of the world, but attitudes among the baby boomers show otherwise.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: IcyTea31 on March 18, 2017, 02:40:02 am
PTW
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do?
Post by: Loud Whispers on March 19, 2017, 09:33:14 am
New Hypothetical Situation.
You, and only you have access to a specific machine.
The machine will permanently remove major obstacles to human civilization, but for a price.
The options are
1. - permanently remove the ability for diseases to develop antibiotic resistances (and remove all current medical resistances)
2. - humanity is provided with an infrastructure system and detailed schematics for the building and operation of fusion power generation plants.
3. - Remove all national distinctions and cultural tensions (unite the world)
Each option you choose will result in the spontaneous death of 1/3 of the world's population. (you are excluded)
You may substitute your life in payment for one of the options.
No one will ever know about your access to the machine and the decisions you make.
1. Gods no, if the implication is that evolution ceases to be
2. While this is objectively the best option, I am concerned that the spontaneous death of 1/3rd the world's population would actually do more damage than fusion power would do in benefit. Humanity can deal with 1/3 of the population dying, but 1/3rd the world population dying at random all across the world? There's a fair chance of everything going completely tits up with world leaders, scientists and vital infrastructure personnel just up and dropping in what the doom prophets would be jumping to call rapture as the third world war begins amidst the chaos.
3. I would not sacrifice national distinctions just to alleviate cultural tension, I would certainly not do so at the cost of billions of human souls. Substituting my life in payment for option 2 would be the logical decision, however I am concerned that the machine may not be sincere in delivering its promise. How would I know for example, that the machine will not simply kill me and deliver none of its promises?

Here's a new hypothetical:
You have a briefcase. It appeared on your bed(or equivalent) this morning, out of nowhere. In the briefcase are 5 vials, a million dollars, and a note.
The note explains that you've been chosen to prepare humanity for the impending apocalypse. In 5 years, an alien invasion will begin. You're expected to mobilize and unite humanity to be as ready as possible for this threat, the nature of which is currently unknown to you.
The note also explains that the vials grant psionic powers to anybody that drinks one, drinking a second will temporarily supercharge one's powers to the point of being a one-man army, but a third will be lethal.
What do?
The first thing I would do is collect four companions, together we five would form the illuminati, with a combined warchest of one million dollars with each individual drinking one of the vials. In this manner we would maximize the psionic output per vial, assuming of course whatever is in the vial cannot be replicated (because otherwise this may turn into "I wish for unlimited wishes"). Between the five of us, maintaining communication through regular psionic meetups with our Grand Illuminator/Commander (I imagine selecting who our GI would be would be a rather simple case of electing the individual with the best communication and psionic potential). The four delegated Illuminators would thereupon be tasked with recruiting members to their factions in North America, Europe, East Asia and Southern Asia, which would allow the four delegated Illuminators to concentrate their efforts on dominating in the shortest time the largest population of the most influential Earthlings. Within five years, domination of majority of the public is unlikely, but domination of the elite is far more achievable. The Prime Illuminator themself would not look for any specific geographical locale, but would instead begin construction of an evil lair the most fortified and concealed position on planet Earth, wherein they would place themselves as the future nexus of human resistance. Designation: Queen's Nest

Thereafter we shall unleash the news through the media, through the world's leaders and astronomers all concluding the dire truth: We are not alone in the Universe, and we are all the more imperiled for it. Push for the United Nations to declare world martial law (we would have to set a few precedents without regard to sovereignty or international law) and mobilize doomsday paramilitary groups to begin fortifying all of their abodes whilst moving from the cities into the mountains, hills, innwds, with guns, ammunition, water and food to last. Millions would die in the chaos, this would be a useful time to weed out all opponents to the Illuminati, thereupon ensuring the alien invasion is met with a unified Earthling command. Also at this point focus all the world's economies available to us into total war economies, unifying all military secrets, technologies and production lines to create the largest human war machine mankind has ever made. The foundations for this would all have to be done within 6-12 months, giving us at least 3-4 years to give time for the massive reorganization of mankind towards war.

Leaving much of the macro and micro scale preparations to the best talented generals and ministers we have available, all efforts would be focused upon three grand strategic principles:
*Rendering all of human civilization battle-ready for the destruction that is to ensue. Being invaded by an extragalactic enemy force, it is unlikely humankind has many weapons capable of damaging the aliens. That is irrelevant, as we do not know what the capabilities of the aliens are or what their objective is. If they have come to conquer, exterminate or harvest, humans hunkered down and spread all over the world will inevitably be harder to destroy than unprepared humans residing in urban clusters. This will buy humankind more time for specialists to learn of the aliens and develop countermeasures, cyber, biological, radiological, psychological, kinetic, strategic - and so on, all doctrines from all mankind if given enough time will be able to discern how the aliens work, why they are invading and how to combat them. The initial assault whereupon it is unlikely that humankind will be able to inflict any damage upon the invader whilst they in turn are assaulted by orbital aliens will be the most devastating period, where human morale may be shattered. If we can get humankind to survive this phase, our chances of reaching parity and victory with the aliens increases drastically.
*Militiarizing outer space for the first time. It is unlikely that humankind's first warships will be anything quality compared to the aliens, but their sacrifices in orbit will provide us with valuable information regarding the aliens' capabilities in preparation for their first planetary assault. Moreover, the development of international military aeronautical infrastructure will be of paramount importance to bringing the fight to the aliens if we are capable of reverse engineering their warships.
*Formulating doomsday devices. Relativistic weapons that can destroy the aliens' homeworlds, in addition to doomsday devices that can destroy all of planet Earth. The briefcase has informed us the aliens are invading, when it stands to reason that if they wanted to exterminate us they could just destroy our planet. Evidently they want something on the planet or they want possession of the planet itself, thus if we can threaten to destroy it it can buy us valuable time or force the aliens to the negotiating table.

After the preparatory years are over, I would have our Prime World Leader representative send a message to the aliens declaring that we have expected them for a long time and thus have made adequate preparations. Thereupon we would invite their leader to come and see planet Earth. If they accept, with communications done in psionics to account for differing biologies and communication forms, begin discerning why they are here and what they want, to accelerate our preparations. If they decline and launch the initial assault, they will wipe out much of mankind's communication infrastructure, at which point the Illuminati will direct all of Earth's resistance through their psionic network. Grand Illuminator to the Council of Four, Council of Four to their regional delegates, regional delegates to their Generals and so on down the chain of command. This will take up all the time of the Illuminati, and the risk of losing the psionic communication network will mean all the psionics would be hunkered down in their respective fortified HQs.

Thereafter it will simply be a question of time.
If we are victorious, we shall psionically interrogate the aliens remaining until we discover their homeland, reverse engineer their technology and begin colonizing the stars - the psionics then extending their communication network through the stars, transforming humanity into one unified galactic species. If we are defeated, threaten the aliens with destroying planet Earth unless they leave.

The most significant variable besides the aliens' initial unknowable nature is that we also do not know who provided us with the briefcase. Are they allies, are they human, are they a different kind of alien to the ones invading etc.? What are their plans? It is for example, entirely possible that the pretence of alien invasion is all a ruse, and mankind is being prepared for the stars by some unknown 3rd party. Thus in the event of the 6th year approaching and there being no alien invasion, at once set about with the spacefleet to the goal of colonizing the solar system and the galaxy as a whole. Spread out the pionics as far and wide as possible. There is a danger if the aliens do not arrive that the Illuminati commence infighting, this situation would be fatal for mankind, carved between five psionic warlords, thus the Illuminati would have to commit suicide or spread out into the stars to ensure this never happened. This of course would also maximize the chance of humanity surviving, ensuring that even if Earth was wiped out, others would survive unseen to carry the torch forwards.

My biggest concern in the aftermath, whether or not there is an invasion, whether or not mankind is victorious is what happens when the psionics die. Will their descendants form dynasties of psionics, or does the psionic power die with them? Would future psionics be able to maintain a centralized galactic state, or would it collapse like Alexander's Empire, going to the strongest? I suppose the alternative would be to attempt to create an Immortal Man Emperor of Mankind, thus ensuring no succession crises like that
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do?
Post by: Azzuro on March 19, 2017, 12:17:03 pm
2. While this is objectively the best option, I am concerned that the spontaneous death of 1/3rd the world's population would actually do more damage than fusion power would do in benefit. Humanity can deal with 1/3 of the population dying, but 1/3rd the world population dying at random all across the world? There's a fair chance of everything going completely tits up with world leaders, scientists and vital infrastructure personnel just up and dropping in what the doom prophets would be jumping to call rapture as the third world war begins amidst the chaos.

This is a good point. It'll basically be the Black Death come again, except across the entire world instantly rather than just Eurasia, with all the attendant socio-economic upheaval and war. Hell, just gathering burying the bodies alone before they start to rot could be an uphill task especially in urban areas. And modern economies definitely can't survive the loss of 1/3rd of the workforce in any recognisable fashion: this will also be the mother of all economic recessions. It also took the world population 2-3 centuries to recover to pre-Black Death levels, so really, sacrificing 1/3rd of the world's population for any of the three options is unthinkable in terms of advantage gained.

My biggest concern in the aftermath, whether or not there is an invasion, whether or not mankind is victorious is what happens when the psionics die. Will their descendants form dynasties of psionics, or does the psionic power die with them? Would future psionics be able to maintain a centralized galactic state, or would it collapse like Alexander's Empire, going to the strongest? I suppose the alternative would be to attempt to create an Immortal Man Emperor of Mankind, thus ensuring no succession crises like that

In the grim darkness of the 39th millennium there is only the search for ayylmaos to fight.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do?
Post by: Loud Whispers on March 19, 2017, 01:04:00 pm
This is a good point. It'll basically be the Black Death come again, except across the entire world instantly rather than just Eurasia, with all the attendant socio-economic upheaval and war. Hell, just gathering burying the bodies alone before they start to rot could be an uphill task especially in urban areas. And modern economies definitely can't survive the loss of 1/3rd of the workforce in any recognisable fashion: this will also be the mother of all economic recessions. It also took the world population 2-3 centuries to recover to pre-Black Death levels, so really, sacrificing 1/3rd of the world's population for any of the three options is unthinkable in terms of advantage gained.
Aye. Even worse than the black death too, in that the deaths are spontaneous, while the black death ravaged over decades allowing people to (broadly speaking) accommodate, plan and prepare for it. 1/3rd of the world just dying at once at the same time - I imagine the shock alone would kill many more, it could very well turn out to be one of those ironic things where humanity then has fusion power but human civilization collapses. One shudders even to think how humankind would even go about the rest of their lives having experienced such an unknown and terrifying mass death event, the cults that would ensue would be fanatical

In the grim darkness of the 39th millennium there is only the search for ayylmaos to fight.
"Somewhere, some incredible ayyylmao is waiting to be killed." - Carl Sagan

Also on review, I guess another way the ayylmaos could invade would be through infiltration, which wouldn't exactly work with all of mankind given advance forewarning to fear anything that might be ayylmaos. Also ban anime
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
The illuminati would have to ban anime to thwart ayylmao infiltration of human society by normalizing martian beauty standards
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do?
Post by: Folly on March 19, 2017, 01:29:00 pm
In the briefcase are 5 vials...In 5 years, an alien invasion will begin...the vials grant psionic powers to anybody that drinks one, drinking a second will temporarily supercharge one's powers to the point of being a one-man army, but a third will be lethal.
The first thing I would do is collect four companions...with each individual drinking one of the vials. In this manner we would maximize the psionic output per vial

The first alien arrives, his psionic powers are exactly 10% stronger than those granted by the vials. He hunts down you and your companions one by one and eliminates you because you have no way to power-up.

You have failed the test and Earth is destroyed to make room for an intergalactic highway.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do?
Post by: Loud Whispers on March 19, 2017, 03:11:49 pm
The first alien arrives, his psionic powers are exactly 10% stronger than those granted by the vials. He hunts down you and your companions one by one and eliminates you because you have no way to power-up.

You have failed the test and Earth is destroyed to make room for an intergalactic highway.
That situation would actually be very beneficial to my strategy. For starters, the first alien would have to get through the orbital forces first. Then it would have to make landfall on a fortified Earth, before navigating its way through a militiarized and heavily policed Earthling society - all unnoticed, which would nearly be impossible. It would then have to track down one of the human psionics despite the human psionics residing in heavily fortified and secretive bases with no need for contact with the outside world, and then have to kill one of the human psionics. Assuming it doesn't do anything like step on a landmine or eat bullets and missiles, it then has to defeat the human psionic with a mere 10% advantage in power, which would not exactly be much when considering reinforcements from conventional human forces.

Upon killing that human psionic, this then reveals that the alien invasion has begun, the aliens are psionic in nature, and that they are targeting human psionics - given that the other four psionics are on other corners of the world, there is no way then to stop this information being known by the rest of humanity and for countermeasures to be enacted, especially if all five are regularly maintaining contact - meaning even if one is taken by surprise and cannot send a distress message or warning, their absence will be noted. Once mankind dons their tinfoil hat technology or whatever alternative available, the aliens will be dealing with a mankind who knows what their enemy is and what their capabilities are. Thereafter this one alien, all by itself, will be stuck on planet Earth with the other four psionics directing the effort to hunt and capture it down. With this thing being 10% stronger than any one psionic, we're talking a psionic that's 110% capability versus the other four psionics at 400% before you factor in the billions of humans searching for it.

I am of the opinion that putting the vials into temporary usage on fewer individuals is putting too many eggs in one basket with too little resilience. Having one one-man army psionic on the frontline uses two vials and is only temporary simply sucks. It is worse if it is halted by the fact that if the invasion is planetwide, having one single psionic will simply be incapable of affecting any meaningful defence except in one geographical location. Only by directing human resources planetwide can the vials be most effectively utilized, both in short, medium and long term. It would be meaningless to have one individual drink all vials, become supersteroids psionic and then die having slaughtered the first wave of the enemy invasion, only to have all of mankind die in a following attack - or to know there is still the alien civilization out there.

Moreover, there is also the risk that the vials themselves are the ploy used by the aliens to conquer planet Earth, using psionic Earthlings to subjugate planet Earth in the most efficient manner possible before usurping and assuming command over the institutions and networks the psionics have crafted. Thus having a one-man army psionic would be too dangerous to humanity, the psionic humans must be valuable to humanity (providing intercontinental communications that cannot be destroyed by a spacefaring civilization is invaluable) without themselves being unstoppable to humanity (if in an unlikely event it turns out that the psionic humans are the unwitting tool of a rival faction of aliens, humans must stand a chance of being able to kill them). Dividing the vials in this way, ensuring none of the psionics can become one men armies at all, maximizes the utility of the psionics whilst likewise maximizing the reasonable chances for humanity to murder them if they go rogue, minimizing the damage done if any of the psionics die, and also ensuring that none of the psionics is strong enough to simply wipe out the other psionics easily and monopolize their rule to the detriment of defence preparations.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do?
Post by: Folly on March 19, 2017, 04:31:28 pm
the first alien would have to get through the orbital forces first.
The psionic bends space around itself, making it's ship invisible to all automated defenses.
It would then have to track down one of the human psionics despite the human psionics residing in heavily fortified and secretive bases with no need for contact with the outside world
10% more psionic power allows it to sense lesser psionics anywhere in the galaxy, while hiding it's own presence from detection by the weaker psionics.
it then has to defeat the human psionic with a mere 10% advantage in power, which would not exactly be much when considering reinforcements from conventional human forces.
Conventional human reinforcements are incapable of perceiving the psionic as a threat or anything out of the ordinary. Psionics basically trump all non-psionic defenses.
Upon killing that human psionic, this then reveals that the alien invasion has begun
The alien does not kill it's victims immediately. Upon overwhelming their inferior minds, it takes control of them and forces them to act normally until it has finished neutralizing all potential threats.
we're talking a psionic that's 110% capability versus the other four psionics at 400%
Psionic powers are not additive in that fashion. It would be like 4 guys with guns against 1 guy with a tank. Those 4 guys are going to be wishing they had that temporary army.
Moreover, there is also the risk that the vials themselves are the ploy used by the aliens to conquer planet Earth, using psionic Earthlings to subjugate planet Earth in the most efficient manner possible before usurping and assuming command over the institutions and networks the psionics have crafted.
So, you're handed a weapon and presented with an overwhelming enemy, and you refuse to use the weapon on the grounds that it might be what the enemy wants you to do? You're definitely screwed if you don't use the weapon, so you gotta take that risk.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Cthulhu on March 19, 2017, 04:34:25 pm
I'd flip all three switches, fuck the police.

Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do?
Post by: misko27 on March 19, 2017, 05:45:50 pm
STUFF
Everything you just said is an assumption based evidence not provided in the initial hypothetical. Saying psionic powers are not additive? I'm sorry, I'll need to see your degree in Psionics to trust you on that one.

For all you know, the aliens have 220% better psychic power, not 110%, so keeping the extra power is pointless entirely. For all you know, psionic power works exponentially when used between multiple people, so the power of five people is far more than a single individual. For all you know, psionic powers are barely better than placebos to begin with, as our only definition of their power is that 200% makes you into a one-man army, which still doesn't tell us much about 100% (20/80 principle kiddos).

It's better to limit our assumptions to things we actually know from the hypothetical, otherwise this is just Superman v. Goku.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Frumple on March 19, 2017, 06:02:10 pm
... seriously though, which superman are we talking? If you're going to bring it up, it's time to tread thoroughly trod upon old ground.

Goku's conceptually limited in some ways, but some of the superman incarnations have a list of powers that just reads, "Yes." Others get punched to death. Pick yer baseline!
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Folly on March 19, 2017, 09:28:47 pm
I'm sorry, I'll need to see your degree in Psionics to trust you on that one.

(https://u3.photofunia.com/2/results/3/l/3lTG4qDUVDtt_yS5IpRoKg_r.jpg)

If superman had a solar grenade that could supercharge his powers, and he knew that Goku was coming to pick a fight, so he used his solar grenade as a flashlight before Goku even showed up, then Superman would rightfully get his Kryptonian ass handed to him.

Regardless of the details, you had an option for powering up, and you squandered it based entirely on your own completely unfounded assumptions. If you had kept one or two vials in reserve, you would have been prepared. Instead, you killed us all.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Neonivek on March 19, 2017, 09:44:46 pm
I should remind you that come Dragon Ball Super... Goku has taken a severe drop in power level.

So thusly we should wait until the Aliens get their powers lowered... You know "Power Seep, Power Creep"

The worst show for this... was Saint Seiya without any competition. I should state the characters part way through the series move at the speed of light.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on March 19, 2017, 09:48:20 pm
Suddenly a wild Goku vs. Superman appears... >.>
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Neonivek on March 19, 2017, 09:50:11 pm
I dunno... is it important to the discussion?

I mean even if the aliens aren't that powerful... typically the fact that they can fight us from space... from perfect safety... pretty much dooms us.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Folly on March 19, 2017, 10:06:58 pm
I dunno... is it important to the discussion?
I mean even if the aliens aren't that powerful... typically the fact that they can fight us from space... from perfect safety... pretty much dooms us.

What part of "psionics trump all non-psionic weapons" aren't you understanding? Our psionic humans will simply generate light-barriers to protect our cities from the alien spaceship weapons. All we have to fear are the superior alien psionics, and then only if we don't have power-up vials to make our psionics stronger than theirs.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Strife26 on March 19, 2017, 10:12:30 pm
It's fine, we'll just use DU dust to counteract psionic fields.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Neonivek on March 19, 2017, 10:16:40 pm
I dunno... is it important to the discussion?
I mean even if the aliens aren't that powerful... typically the fact that they can fight us from space... from perfect safety... pretty much dooms us.

What part of "psionics trump all non-psionic weapons" aren't you understanding? Our psionic humans will simply generate light-barriers to protect our cities from the alien spaceship weapons. All we have to fear are the superior alien psionics, and then only if we don't have power-up vials to make our psionics stronger than theirs.

Yeah more powerful than... But, for example, a laser hits us faster than we can respond.

Or they could pump a toxin into our atmosphere... or throw asteroids down on us so our entire earth is covered in a thick crust blotting out the sun and killing our fields.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MetalSlimeHunt on March 19, 2017, 10:31:48 pm
No, no, no, you don't use dense materials to disrupt psionics, you keep a bunch of people on LSD drips in hidden compartments around so the psionic accidentally reads their minds and starts hallucinating.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Strife26 on March 19, 2017, 10:58:42 pm
It's not the density, it's the carcinogenic and pyrophoric properties.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Frumple on March 20, 2017, 12:48:40 am
If you're going to go through all that trouble, why not set everything on fire? Aliens can't catch you if the atmosphere is on fire, and everyone knows the cure to all space magic is space napalm. All problems solved.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Azzuro on March 20, 2017, 07:33:21 am
Look, all you need to do is build a few Psi-Labs, hire enough rookies to fill them, then just turtle up for 2-3 months and ignore the missions with psionic aliens. If you absolutely have to do a mission with enemy psionics or India signs a pact with the aliens, just land, blindfire two rockets out of the Skyranger, and dust off.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on March 20, 2017, 08:01:58 pm
Hypothetical continuation!

Okay, so, assuming you've beaten the aliens, you now have quite a bit of new technology and biology to analyze. What will you do now? Will you lead humanity to the stars? Will you take control over Earth permanently? Will you try to discover how psionics work? What will you do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Neonivek on March 20, 2017, 08:04:07 pm
Hypothetical continuation!

Okay, so, assuming you've beaten the aliens, you now have quite a bit of new technology and biology to analyze. What will you do now? Will you lead humanity to the stars? Will you take control over Earth permanently? Will you try to discover how psionics work? What will you do?

Who died and made us king?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MetalSlimeHunt on March 20, 2017, 08:14:03 pm
Hypothetically, say that you're shitposting on Bay 12 in a thread started by Neonivek about a hypothetical situation, and as you read through the posts you eventually come across a scenario posted by DPRK Threadlord and sexy beast MetalSlimeHunt, where he gets all weird about the thread's purpose and acts self-aggrandizing like he always does.

How do you respond?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on March 20, 2017, 08:25:24 pm
Like this.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on March 20, 2017, 08:37:09 pm
Hypothetically, say that you're shitposting on Bay 12 in a thread started by Neonivek about a hypothetical situation, and as you read through the posts you eventually come across a scenario posted by DPRK Threadlord and sexy beast MetalSlimeHunt, where he gets all weird about the thread's purpose and acts self-aggrandizing like he always does.

How do you respond?


I use the advanced knowledge gained from the aliens to annihilate the entire Korean peninsula, most of Indonesia, Hawaii and all the other Pacific Islands, a large portion of China, Japan, half of Australia (the shit half with nothing in it), a significant chunk of Africa, and then MSH's house in wherever he lives, just for good measure. I then lead the remaining human population into space to conquer everything in the universe. >.>
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: misko27 on March 20, 2017, 08:43:36 pm
Hypothetical continuation!

Okay, so, assuming you've beaten the aliens, you now have quite a bit of new technology and biology to analyze. What will you do now? Will you lead humanity to the stars? Will you take control over Earth permanently? Will you try to discover how psionics work? What will you do?
All of the above!
Who died and made us king?
You did, if you oppose my glorious and enlightened rule. The tragedy of our times, but necessary if we want to create the world of the future that I we want to have.
Hypothetically, say that you're shitposting on Bay 12 in a thread started by Neonivek about a hypothetical situation, and as you read through the posts you eventually come across a scenario posted by DPRK Threadlord and sexy beast MetalSlimeHunt, where he gets all weird about the thread's purpose and acts self-aggrandizing like he always does.

How do you respond?
Mostly ignore him in favor of expounding on how I intend to pervert the most recent hypothetical to conquer the Solar System, pausing to speak self-referentially in response to the above.
I use the advanced knowledge gained from the aliens to annihilate the entire Korean peninsula, most of Indonesia, Hawaii and all the other Pacific Islands, a large portion of China, Japan, half of Australia (the shit half with nothing in it), a significant chunk of Africa, and then MSH's house in wherever he lives, just for good measure. I then lead the remaining human population into space to conquer everything in the universe. >.>
Wait wait wait, hold up a second there. People live in Australia? ??? Why? Why would anyone do that? Who thought that was a good idea? What led someone to thinking that was wise?

New hypothetical: you've discovered a godless, forsaken continent to the south with strange and hostile wildlife. Can you imagine any reason to colonize this barren landmass that isn't an extended form of mass-suicide? And if so, how?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Baffler on March 20, 2017, 08:46:56 pm
Hypothetically, say that you're shitposting on Bay 12 in a thread started by Neonivek about a hypothetical situation, and as you read through the posts you eventually come across a scenario posted by DPRK Threadlord and sexy beast MetalSlimeHunt, where he gets all weird about the thread's purpose and acts self-aggrandizing like he always does.

How do you respond?

I respond to the prompt as presented, while silently judging Bay12's own representative of the glorious Korean People's Juche North Korea for harming the his cause with such shameless egotism.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on March 20, 2017, 08:48:25 pm
New hypothetical: you've discovered a godless, forsaken continent to the south with strange and hostile wildlife. Can you imagine any reason to colonize this barren landmass that isn't an extended form of mass-suicide? And if so, how?
Send all the criminals and let them set up a colony for the empire.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on March 20, 2017, 08:49:16 pm
New hypothetical: you've discovered a godless, forsaken continent to the south with strange and hostile wildlife. Can you imagine any reason to colonize this barren landmass that isn't an extended form of mass-suicide? And if so, how?


Prison continent.

I'd send political prisoners there, because I am PURE FUCKING EVIL.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on March 20, 2017, 08:57:28 pm
New hypothetical: you've discovered a godless, forsaken continent to the south with strange and hostile wildlife. Can you imagine any reason to colonize this barren landmass that isn't an extended form of mass-suicide? And if so, how?
GOLD! OIL! Other underground natural resources! Also, a place to live. Overpopulation isn't a concern anymore.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Frumple on March 21, 2017, 02:15:34 am
Plot twist, freakish arboreal monstrosities inhabiting the continent perpetually manufacture clones of the nearest intelligent lifeform once one comes close enough to them. By the time your colonists land on the shore, each one has a dozen confused copies waiting for them, casually excreting upon your attempts to solve overpopulation concerns. In trying to exploit the abominable hellscape, you have magnified your problem twelvefold and rising.

In short order starvation and overexploitation by desperate cast off mimics leaves the land barren of useful materials, hosting several new and horrifyingly deadly plagues, and flooding the continents of the rest of the world with an unending stream of confused replications of your expeditionary population.

BAD END
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on March 21, 2017, 02:18:21 am
In reaction to above, send in marines to torch the whole ecosystem, then exploit resources.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Frumple on March 21, 2017, 02:27:01 am
You'd probably rather it or something. You need something a ways off, offshore artillery just makes them launch giant balls of clones at the ships. Sending in marines would just get you an unending stream of marines running back at you and/or being used as counter artillery projectiles. Don't ask how the tree creatures copy their equipment, too.

You might be better off just cutting your losses, really.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on March 21, 2017, 09:39:04 am
No. NUKES. Wait a few thousand years after that, then get mining.
Alternatively, napalm.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on March 21, 2017, 12:41:13 pm
They can copy the equipment, but they can't copy good old spess mreen discipline! Equip everyone with flamethrowers, so when the clones try to shoot back they just help burn the foliage. They can't counter-shell our ships because we came in on ICBMs.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Frumple on March 21, 2017, 12:50:19 pm
Eventually the flamethrowers run out of fuel. The biological improbabilities just keep coming.

... also they totally copy the discipline, too. These are near perfect current state copies. Don't ask how the tree critters work. The clones probably wouldn't even be hostile if not for everyone trying to shoot them or let them die of starvation and neglect. and maybe just a little bit of brain chemistry alteration, who can say
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on March 21, 2017, 02:05:31 pm
Run out of fuel? There is more fuel being cloned constantl  for marines to Loot like videogame protagonists. And screw ye, PATRIOTISM can't be cloned by alien scum.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: helmacon on March 21, 2017, 02:54:19 pm
Hire the clones in logging operations. Their own creations will destroy them.

alternatively, exploit this as a source of renewable and quickly produced cattle/fish.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on March 22, 2017, 09:38:17 am
New hypothetical!
You find a spell book on your bed, and as you touch it, you feel it bind to you.
Choose any one D&D 3.5e or Pathfinder spell, 6th spell level or less, and you can now use it once per day, ignoring material cost. What class the spell belongs to doesn't matter. What is your choice, if any?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do?
Post by: Loud Whispers on March 22, 2017, 11:17:29 am
The psionic bends space around itself, making it's ship invisible to all automated defenses.
Then assuming all manned vehicles also fail to stop the alien, we have learned the alien invaders manipulate space itself and are potent psionics.

10% more psionic power allows it to sense lesser psionics anywhere in the galaxy, while hiding it's own presence from detection by the weaker psionics.
If we hold this to be true. I argue the contrary, given that more power makes things more visible, but ey, reality warping ayy lmaos are dangerous so let's assume the worse. My proposition proposes that the vials be divided between 5 people, which gives the maximum psionic potential over the longest period of time - literally only limited by the lifespan of the psionic humans in question. Assuming that the psionic ayy lmao is capable of infiltrating planet Earth without any of the 5 psionics from noticing that something more powerful than them has arrived, how on Earth (or indeed, out of Earth) would your proposal be better?

Analyzing this, we can have two scenarios. One wherein the five psionics have prepared for the full 5 years to mobilize all of mankind into a giant war state with screening and bureaucratic surveillance. I don't care if the psionic ayy lmao can make itself invisible, I want to know where its papers are, otherwise all glory to Arstoska, the ayy lmao has been found :P
Moreover, let us assume that psionic power is not additive and that contrary to human naturte, cooperation does not drastically multiply the power of weaker individuals. How is holding vials in reserve going to help at all? If we have simply one person holding onto the vials waiting for an invisible psionic material warping alien to show up only to use the vials then, that alien is just going to kill the human who cannot have any chance of sensing the psionc whatsoever, with that ayy lmao then taking control of all the vials. Also hell, even if each individual psionic cannot sense the one alien psionc, they will know when one of their own goes silent.

Let us assume this ordinary human is somehow capable of sensing the psionic and drinking two vials before the ayy lmao kills him. This human becomes a one man army, and is capable of killing the ayy lmao before it runs away. The increased psionic potential runs out, as it is only temporary. We're now down to 3 vials, and one psionic at standard strength, having killed only ONE alien. The aliens will now know that there is a human capable of outmatching their psionic potential on a temporary basis. There is absolutely nothing stopping them from wiping out all of humanity around this one human, there's no way in hell this human can stop the aliens from wiping out every human centre across the globe where this one psionic is. As soon as they realize this one psionic is only more powerful than them temporarily, they are going to launch their full assault, all of mankind's conventional communications will be wiped out, the psionic will be killed and all of mankind will be at the mercy of this extragalactic invader.

It makes zero sense whatsoever to be competing with an alien invader on their strengths when the aliens are objectively superior to you in every capacity. You need to compete on the strengths of humans.

Conventional human reinforcements are incapable of perceiving the psionic as a threat or anything out of the ordinary. Psionics basically trump all non-psionic defenses.
Then the alternative is having one human who is capable of perceiving the psionic threat for four temporary instances. If there are more than four aliens, of if the aliens attack outside of those four instances when one human is overpowered, mankind is defenceless and will certainly perish defenceless. On the contrary, having five psionics direct the defence, it doesn't matter if the humans cannot perceive the alien - the psionics can, and can direct the reinforcements to kill the aliens.

The alien does not kill it's victims immediately. Upon overwhelming their inferior minds, it takes control of them and forces them to act normally until it has finished neutralizing all potential threats.
The problem is that this then creates a very visible blackspot upon the already established illuminati network - it would be akin to a city full of lights, with one district suddenly having a blackout, a blackout visibly spreading in a certain direction. Normal human information analysis would be able to reveal the geographic locale of the alien, especially with the five psionics spread around the Earth - even if each individual psionic cannot sense where the alien is, because its magic psionic powers means it is more powerful than Sonic OCs, they can see where the humans formerly under their control have blacked out of the grid.

Psionic powers are not additive in that fashion. It would be like 4 guys with guns against 1 guy with a tank. Those 4 guys are going to be wishing they had that temporary army.
Whose to say that they are not? This alien has 110% the power relative to one individual with one vial at 100%. Someone who is 10% stronger than me and 10% tougher than me cannot help but be overwhelmed if there are five of me. It is like a beetle that is 10% larger than and vastly tougher and stronger than any individual ant. Yet two ants is enough to kill the beetle in safety, five ants is overkill. This is again assuming that all of humankind is ineffectual against the enemy, which is a big assumption to make - the note explicitly commanded us to mobilize humanity, one of the foremost details is that humanity will be of paramount importance to the defence of humankind.

Put another way, I am not at all interested in wasting a limited resource merely defeating one tank, when I am mobilizing the entire species and sum total of human civilization against an enemy that probably has multiple tanks and must be defeated asymmetrically.

So, you're handed a weapon and presented with an overwhelming enemy, and you refuse to use the weapon on the grounds that it might be what the enemy wants you to do? You're definitely screwed if you don't use the weapon, so you gotta take that risk.
No, I'm handed a weapon and presented with an enemy I don't know. I don't know what they want, what their capabilities are, whether they exist, what form they exist in, are they psionic, are they a swarm of critters, a mechanized borg, an extragalactic colony of long lost humans, a bunch of FTL pacifists etc.

I'm given five tools. Taken together, these tools can either provide an invaluable and permanent benefit to the defence of mankind, providing a communications network that cannot be destroyed in the high likelihood our satelites are wiped out and power grid is compromised. Moreover the actual consolidation of humanity and mobilization of humanity is a daunting task in of itself, having five full-time psionics working on all the corners of the globe's most powerful leaders would allow for the quickest consolidation and mobilization in the meagre five years provided.

Thus I can choose. Provide an invaluable utility to mankind which will keep it united through the apocalypse, or I can create a weapon which will last a few days against a threat which is a planetary invasion, which suggests an incredibly protracted campaign - how can you be thinking of creating temporary supermen out of a limited resource when the enemy can simply wait in space for your ability to run out? Rofl
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on March 22, 2017, 06:00:13 pm
I'm from the USA, so I would keep it all to myself and pretend that it is super expensive to make and produce/sell it sparingly so I can live on a yacht for the rest of my life. I would practice my indignant tone for whenever someone tries to point out what I'm doing.

Then I would receive some kind of national award and go down in USA history as a good guy.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on March 22, 2017, 06:11:26 pm
I know the above answer is for the cure to cancer, but it's amusing to me to imagine it's for the psy-vials instead.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Frumple on March 22, 2017, 06:43:38 pm
New hypothetical!
You find a spell book on your bed, and as you touch it, you feel it bind to you.
Choose any one D&D 3.5e or Pathfinder spell, 6th spell level or less, and you can now use it once per day, ignoring material cost. What class the spell belongs to doesn't matter. What is your choice, if any?
Prestidigitation, at least so long as it stayed cantrippy and I could ignore that 1/day thing. Least wish for the win.

If it'd still hold the 1/day thing, probably mage's lubrication. If you have to choose a spell it might as well be the one that lets you choose a bunch of other ones. Probably something better than that specific one for the same effect in some 3.5e or pathfinder splatbook, but eh, close enough.

... though depending on if summoning works and you can hunt up a spell that lets you call in efreeti or somethin' that can still cast wish, well...
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on March 22, 2017, 06:45:29 pm
I don't know DnD spells very well, so I guess I'd just take fireball.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on March 22, 2017, 06:55:41 pm
New hypothetical!
You find a spell book on your bed, and as you touch it, you feel it bind to you.
Choose any one D&D 3.5e or Pathfinder spell, 6th spell level or less, and you can now use it once per day, ignoring material cost. What class the spell belongs to doesn't matter. What is your choice, if any?
Prestidigitation, at least so long as it stayed cantrippy and I could ignore that 1/day thing. Least wish for the win.

If it'd still hold the 1/day thing, probably mage's lubrication. If you have to choose a spell it might as well be the one that lets you choose a bunch of other ones. Probably something better than that specific one for the same effect in some 3.5e or pathfinder splatbook, but eh, close enough.

... though depending on if summoning works and you can hunt up a spell that lets you call in efreeti or somethin' that can still cast wish, well...

Summon Monster VI.

You can summon minor genies, which can cast other spells. it's not until VII that you can summon ACTUAL genies, which have like a 1% chance to be able to cast wish.

Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Frumple on March 22, 2017, 07:25:12 pm
Actually wouldn't work by rules as written, I think, assuming they're in effect. At some point summoning was clarified such that things specifically summoned can't/won't use effects with an XP cost... such as wish. There's other spells that get around that (stuff that binds or calls, ferex), but using SM 6 or whatev' probably wouldn't work. Planar ally (or whatever it's called) or something might.

In any case, any class was specified. I'm sure there's some prestige class or random splatbook out there with a variant/non-standard class with something that would work. I just don't know what it'd be and ain't about to start looking.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on March 22, 2017, 07:45:10 pm
Actually wouldn't work by rules as written, I think, assuming they're in effect. At some point summoning was clarified such that things specifically summoned can't/won't use effects with an XP cost... such as wish. There's other spells that get around that (stuff that binds or calls, ferex), but using SM 6 or whatev' probably wouldn't work. Planar ally (or whatever it's called) or something might.

In any case, any class was specified. I'm sure there's some prestige class or random splatbook out there with a variant/non-standard class with something that would work. I just don't know what it'd be and ain't about to start looking.

Noble Genies are the exception. They are able to grant three wishes. Anyway you'd need SM VII, which the question forbids to begin with.

At VI you can get minor genies, but they can create food for you :D
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on March 27, 2017, 01:56:45 pm
New hypothetical: you learn that a magnitude 11 earthquake will strike California one year from now. As a side note, you no longer need sleep. What do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MetalSlimeHunt on March 27, 2017, 02:01:44 pm
There exist two possibilities:

A. The earthquake scale has undergone a stack overflow, suggesting an incredibly small earthquake.

B. The earthquake scale is advancing logarithmically beyond 10.0, which itself should be all but impossible on Earth and suggests the entire planet is going to be shattered by a massive impact.

Either way, rejoice in my freedom from sleep.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on March 27, 2017, 02:03:36 pm
That's, like, on the other side of the country. Tell everyone about my premonition and then play videogames 24/7.
If people notice that staying awake all the time doesn't kill me, then it would become obvious that something magical is happening; therefore people might actually listen to me and prepare.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Enemy post on March 27, 2017, 02:08:37 pm
Using my non-sleeping as evidence, have California's name changed. Shortly thereafter, have a rock officially named California and shoot it into space.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on March 28, 2017, 02:26:34 pm
Buy up soon-to-be waterfront property in Nevada.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on March 30, 2017, 12:44:18 pm
Okay, new hypothetical. Two of them, actually.

If, for some reason, you needed to keep this thread active for a year(because if you fail to do so, you will end up crushed by a space rock), what would you do?

Secondly... if you have not taken control of the world in the next 20 years, the Yellowstone super volcano will erupt.

Thankfully, you can choose two blueprints and two objects from these two spoilers to help you take control of the world.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
What do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Neonivek on March 30, 2017, 12:45:40 pm
I dunno I thought about taking people's hypotheticals and updating the main page to highlight which one we are on at anytime.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Strife26 on March 30, 2017, 01:44:47 pm
Build several straw accounts and keep the thread purely active within them. Staple pieces of any other hypothetical onto this one whenever they occur in another thread, excepting anything dealing with gun control, because locky-locky would likely be an autofailure.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Playergamer on March 30, 2017, 02:44:36 pm
Need to keep the thread active for a year? Shoot Skyrunner, lock word association game with a post saying it's been moved to this thread for reasons, done.

I'd take the formula for the cancer cure, sell the cure it at a ridiculously high price, buy my own island, declare independence, patent never expires. Sell the giant laser emplacement to the "project starshot" people.

Take the functional jetpack because jetpack, and the camera. The jetpack is just so I have a jetpack. Use the camera to get blackmail on politicians, gain even more influence because ridiculous sums of money.

And answering the question in the first post: Memorize the cancer cure, destroy the formula, create more, sell it for large amounts of money, and bomb the Yulin Dog Festival with the money.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on March 30, 2017, 06:53:26 pm
Hmm. Giant laser, gravity device, million dollars, memory eraser. First make use of memory eraser until nobody remembers that the money is illegally obtained. Invest money into starting a space launch company, using the gravity device to make rockets lighter, making it much cheaper to launch rockets. Do a few genuine launches to make some money, then build a Giant Lazor satellite under cover of something else. Use Giant Lazor to ransom some country for lots of money. Use money to launch more lasers. Repeat until nobody can oppose me because too many lasers.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on March 31, 2017, 12:24:46 pm
1: Post more hypotheticals

2: use briefcase to move to UK, buy nice house w/ underground bunker. Use camera to check on progress of volcano. Grow crazy-man beard, survive volcanocalypse.

Maybe bring the robot double and the gravity thing so I can pretend to be Obi-Wan Kenobi in the following wastelands.

Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on April 05, 2017, 05:22:19 pm
New hypothetical. This thread will not die.

You suddenly realize you only have 30 days left to live before you will die of an unstoppable and thankfully painless heart attack. You also get a can of spray you can use to convince any one person that this is true by spraying them in the face. What do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on April 05, 2017, 05:27:34 pm
Spray self in face with can. Now I can simply believe that the knowledge of my upcoming death is an illusion caused by the can, and live the next 30 days as normal.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MetalSlimeHunt on April 05, 2017, 06:37:39 pm
Spray my most loyal confidants, use their certainty to convince them to hold a surgeon at gunpoint so they'll give me a heart transplant. Spray said surgeon as well so they're more likely to go along with it.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on April 05, 2017, 07:09:53 pm
You also get a can of spray you can use to convince any one person that this is true by spraying them in the face. What do?
Insufficient spray, MetalSlimeHunt.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MetalSlimeHunt on April 05, 2017, 07:11:14 pm
I'm not playing your game, capitalist. I shall seize the memes of hypothesis!
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on April 05, 2017, 07:14:18 pm
Just mix some filler in there.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TheBiggerFish on April 11, 2017, 12:15:49 am
Okay, so FoU's hypothetical:

Take the time machine (camera) and...Something else, I suppose?

Can I take two of those cameras?  Because I want to reverse-engineer them and nothing else really appeals.

As for blueprints: Gravity device, cancer cure.

Use camera to prove I'm for real in controlled trial.

Patent gravity device, license to SpaceX and NASA and similar at a reasonable price.

Patent cure for cancer, release it on an open license (possibly after selling limited doses to rich people for money), manufacture and sell some if no-one else will.  Terminal patients, if nothing else, will thank me.  If we can determine which 10% of people will die, everyone will, and I mean it does depend on the definition of 'die'.

Meanwhile, work my way into everyone's pockets using proceeds from these efforts.  Take control of the world through lobbying or something.  Form world government under best principles from multiple nations.  Take over the world!!! but make sure no-one else can.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on May 08, 2017, 05:37:09 pm
this thread shall not die.

A mysterious stranger sends you an email offering to give you a fictional sword of your choice. He warns that asking for a sword that oversteps his means means you will suffer a punishment of some kind.

Do you ask for a sword? If so, what?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on May 08, 2017, 05:41:40 pm
Master Sword! Why? Because Master Sword!
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on May 11, 2017, 06:52:46 am
New hypothetical: you learn that a magnitude 11 earthquake will strike California one year from now. As a side note, you no longer need sleep. What do?
Be the most productive individual in the world, haunted by a life without dreams. Also California gets destroyed by a mag 11 earthquake because I'd probably forget to warn the Californians, or else not know how to convince them to leave their homes without starting an apocalyptic cult. And can you imagine founding an apocalyptic cult and then getting proven right?

You suddenly realize you only have 30 days left to live before you will die of an unstoppable and thankfully painless heart attack. You also get a can of spray you can use to convince any one person that this is true by spraying them in the face. What do?
I think it would be entertaining to be all mysterious and shit, telling everyone cryptic nonsense about having to go away on the date you expect to die. Settle all your accounts in order before you "depart for another journey" and spread mystical bullshit as far and wide as you can in those 30 days. Also I'd definitely take up skydiving on day 30

this thread shall not die.
A mysterious stranger sends you an email offering to give you a fictional sword of your choice. He warns that asking for a sword that oversteps his means means you will suffer a punishment of some kind.
Do you ask for a sword? If so, what?
I wouldn't ask for a sword, because it's a trick question. If he was offering a non-fictional sword of choice perhaps, but he's instead offering to provide a sword that does not exist with the expectation of punishment if he can't deliver, and he can't deliver because the sword doesn't exist - thus this is clearly the setup to an obscure /tg/ porno or a magical realm situation, in which the only way to win is to not play
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on May 22, 2017, 09:20:07 am
I will singlehandedly keep this thread going if I bloody well have to.

All guns in the world disappear for thirty days, after which they reappear colored red. What happens?

If you got a sword from the mysterious stranger, you are given the opportunity to travel to one fictional world of your choice, keeping the sword. He says if you "beat" it, he will return you home. Do you accept the offer?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TheBiggerFish on May 22, 2017, 10:41:49 am
What happens to gun parts?

What happens to guns that are made in the middle of that 30 days?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on May 22, 2017, 09:34:09 pm
Gun parts stay, guns that are made in the middle also vanish and reappear at the same time.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Strife26 on May 22, 2017, 11:00:56 pm
Gun parts stay, guns that are made in the middle also vanish and reappear at the same time.

How gunlike do the guns have to be to vanish? Does an electronic fired weapon only vanish once a battery is installed? What happens to very early firearms that might just be a tube with a touch hole? If I fill an AR upper receiver with lead or otherwise demilitarize it, does it still vanish whatever lower I connect it to?

Do nongun parts attached to guns vanish too? Things like scopes, becoming progressively gun-like as we consider flashlights, slings, and people holding guns.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on May 23, 2017, 08:35:47 am
If the average American would look at it and see a gun, then it's a gun. It's still a gun even if it can't be fired, so boof. If an average American wouldn't recognize it as a gun, it stays. Yes, because it would still be recognized as a gun.

Some would(like a scope), but most wouldn't as they wouldn't be recognized as essential parts of the gun. It's not like most snipers use iron sights rather than a scope(on the other hand, there was the White Death, but you probably haven't heard of him).
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Strife26 on May 23, 2017, 10:34:56 am
So, if we take the average American to be equal in intelligence to the average American cop, we're looking at temporary vanishing of all cell phones, toy firearms, wallets, and bananas.

If we include the TSA, we can add insulin pumps to the list.


The economic ramifications would not be inconsiderable.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: misko27 on May 24, 2017, 03:01:08 am
If it only depends on whether it looks like a gun, can we disguise it? Or paint it lime green or something?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on May 24, 2017, 03:06:44 am
Take over the world during those thirty day using guns cleverly disguised as crossbows. Without guns, nobody will be able to fight back!
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Imic on May 24, 2017, 03:24:29 am
Step 1: Go to my old school, go to the chemistry teacher, find the other science teacher because she was the worst teacher in the school, and explain to them what's going on.
Step 2: Cure cancer
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on May 24, 2017, 03:04:53 pm
If it only depends on whether it looks like a gun, can we disguise it? Or paint it lime green or something?
If it would be recognized as a gun, poof. If you can disguise it, it might stay if the disguise is good enough.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Neonivek on May 24, 2017, 04:21:34 pm
Quote
you learn that a magnitude 11 earthquake will strike California one year from now

Dear goodness... I am not sure there is anything I could do. I mean Magnitude 11 would mean California is gone and the USA would be in shambles.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: inteuniso on May 25, 2017, 01:54:33 pm
I know right? I feel like the Yellowstone supervolcano, massive asteroids, really any massive world-rending events are better (wow I'm really no better than the government) covered up/hidden/obfuscated/publicly denied. Sending everyone into a mass panic just ensures more people dying & it's not like we can do anything to prevent the disaster anyways.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on May 30, 2017, 11:20:33 am
New hypothetical. You come to consciousness holding an unloaded pistol in front of a corpse filled with bullets from that pistol. What do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Criptfeind on May 30, 2017, 11:25:42 am
New hypothetical. You come to consciousness holding an unloaded pistol in front of a corpse filled with bullets from that pistol. What do?
Turn myself in because I'm having some sorta of extremely serious mental and probably physical health issue and just killed someone?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 14, 2017, 08:55:49 am
New Hypothetical!

You notice a bomb in your basement. If you didn't have a basement, you have one now. The bomb's display says it's going to go off in 30 minutes.

What do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Neonivek on July 14, 2017, 09:12:08 am
Ok...I clear everyone out of my house and then call the police and inform my immediate neighbors.

To admit though given that the bomb will probably blow up my house I probably should have taken my laptop... But this is my wellbeing...
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: IcyTea31 on July 14, 2017, 09:26:38 am
First of all, call the police. My local police don't have an EOD unit, but they do have a protocol for it that involves calling such specialists from elsewhere. They'd probably tell me not to touch the bomb, so I wouldn't and would instead evacuate the house and neighbours while waiting for them, though I'm not sure if they could reach me in 30 minutes. It would most likely go off, causing material damage, but I'm fairly certain my insurance covers it (assuming this is a bomb that occurred naturally and nobody can be blamed for it), though the company would wait for the police to investigate the case.

I don't trust my own abilities to disarm a bomb, and while there are some explosives experts of the private sector in town, I doubt the police would actually call them for assistance.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: exdeath on July 14, 2017, 11:32:06 am
New Hypothetical!

You are the president of the country you were born at (or the one with power to answer this question), and russia* say "become part of russia or we will throw atomic bombs at your country", do you:
A) Accept the deal
or
B)Don't accept the deal and so russia will bomb you.

*if you are from russia, the country that will bomb you is USA.

Some rules:
1-If you tell them you will bomb then back if they do what they say and then and pick choice B, they will still bomb you.

2-If you bomb them first and pick A then won't bomb you back

3-If you bomb them first and pick B they will still bomb you.

EDIT: Its impossible to fix all holes, you could just:
A- not answer the question and so at the same time not be bombed or annexed.
B- Fake your own kidnap to be able to not answer the question and so not be bombed or annexed.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Neonivek on July 14, 2017, 11:45:42 am
To my knowledge mutually ensured destruction is the best dissuasion device and people have argued that the advent of Nukes is in fact one of the main contributors to our world's current state of relative peace.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Criptfeind on July 14, 2017, 12:26:51 pm
New Hypothetical!

You are the president of the country you were born at, and russia* say "become part of russia or we will throw atomic bombs at your country", do you:
A) Accept the deal
or
B)Don't accept the deal and so russia will bomb you.

*if you are from russia, the country that will bomb you is USA.

If Russia is committed to suicide in such a fashion, who am I stop them? I'm the president so probably have a pretty swish nuke bunker anyway.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 14, 2017, 01:43:53 pm
Immediately nuke Russia first.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on July 14, 2017, 01:55:07 pm
If they're warning me first they've basically given me the opportunity to launch a preemptive strike, which could greatly reduce the amount of damage my country takes in the first place. Also we have more nukes than them. :P
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Reelya on July 14, 2017, 11:10:41 pm
New Hypothetical!

You notice a bomb in your basement. If you didn't have a basement, you have one now. The bomb's display says it's going to go off in 30 minutes.

What do?

I'm less than 30 minutes travel from the beach, put the bomb in a bag, catch a tram, throw it into the ocean at the 5 second mark. Not sure the cops can remove the bomb quicker than I could throw it in the ocean.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Neonivek on July 14, 2017, 11:14:47 pm
If they're warning me first they've basically given me the opportunity to launch a preemptive strike, which could greatly reduce the amount of damage my country takes in the first place. Also we have more nukes than them. :P

I dunno how much a preemptive strike can honestly prevent retaliatory strikes.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Reelya on July 14, 2017, 11:17:43 pm
Yeah, after all, both Russia and America built their systems to assume the other side shot first and be able to shoot back. That's how the whole nuclear deterrent system works. Pre-emptive strike on Russia assumes that you can bomb all their nuclear launch systems, across one of the biggest nations on Earth, not even counting nuclear-armed submarines.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: IcyTea31 on July 15, 2017, 01:55:16 am
I'm less than 30 minutes travel from the beach, put the bomb in a bag, catch a tram, throw it into the ocean at the 5 second mark. Not sure the cops can remove the bomb quicker than I could throw it in the ocean.
Since we don't know what sort of explosive the bomb uses, this could cause massive ecological damage. A concrete basement would be a safer place to let it explode, especially as doing so doesn't require touching the bomb. In my opinion bomb disposal is best left to the professionals.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Criptfeind on July 15, 2017, 06:46:46 am
Also if it's a noticeable enough bomb, convincing people it's not your fault is going to be relatively important, especially since it's no ones fault but the authorities will realllllly want someone to blame for it. I feel like if you just chuck it into the sea before it explodes, you're pretty likely to take the blame and not be able to convince them you didn't make it... Of course, you might take the blame anyway for it being in your basement. But I feel like you have a better chance to get away if you tell them about it first thing.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: misko27 on July 15, 2017, 10:58:01 am
My basement is quite big, many people could be blamed who aren't me. The wonders of apartment buildings. So just report it to my building probably, saying "hey, by the way, there is what looks suspiciously like a bomb in our basement."

Also get the hell out of my building. It's not going to collapse or anything, but let's not take any chances eh?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on July 15, 2017, 12:14:49 pm
I'd lock FallacyofUrist in the basement. He presumably put the bomb there so he can deactivate it
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on July 15, 2017, 09:23:40 pm
New Hypothetical!
You notice a bomb in your basement. If you didn't have a basement, you have one now. The bomb's display says it's going to go off in 30 minutes.
What do?
Cook a curry in under 29 minutes, use the last minute to eat the curry. If the bomb was legit I am dead, if it wasn't, I have curry

New Hypothetical!
You are the president of the country you were born at, and russia* say "become part of russia or we will throw atomic bombs at your country", do you:
A) Accept the deal
or
B)Don't accept the deal and so russia will bomb you.
*if you are from russia, the country that will bomb you is USA.
Extra rules:
1-If you tell them you will bomb then back if they do this and pick choice B, they will still bomb you
2-If you bomb them first and pick A then wont bomb you back, if you bomb them first and pick B they will still bomb you.
The UK does not have a President, which means that I would be asked to abolish Parliament and the Monarchy or else face atomic destruction. I'd probably then go with option B-1, wherein we're gonna get bombed so bomb them anyways and just kickstart WWIII because hypothetical putin is being unreasonable

Although I must admit option A is attractive, if only because it would be very difficult for Russia to enforce any authority over such long distance and geographical separation
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 17, 2017, 08:09:39 pm
New hypothetical! Every human on earth falls up instead of down for ten seconds, then gravity resumes as normal. Every year at the exact same time, the same event occurs. How does society change?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 17, 2017, 08:40:08 pm
New hypothetical! Every human on earth falls up instead of down for ten seconds, then gravity resumes as normal. Every year at the exact same time, the same event occurs. How does society change?

We will Duct-Tape ourselves to a tree, Pinky.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on July 17, 2017, 08:48:03 pm
New hypothetical! Every human on earth falls up instead of down for ten seconds, then gravity resumes as normal. Every year at the exact same time, the same event occurs. How does society change?
How would weights, air and pressure affect this. This would alter what happens to divers caught in this anomaly greatly
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Criptfeind on July 17, 2017, 08:52:26 pm
National falling up day would be heavily over commercialized shlock.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: IcyTea31 on July 18, 2017, 05:17:09 am
The various space agencies of the world would use it as a launch day, saving millions in rocket fuel.

Ninjaedit: nevermind, if it's only humans that fall up, this won't work.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 18, 2017, 03:25:20 pm
The various space agencies of the world would use it as a launch day, saving millions in rocket fuel.

Ninjaedit: nevermind, if it's only humans that fall up, this won't work.

The various space agencies of the world would use it as a launch day by packing hundreds of humans into thruster-shaped housings to provide lift, thereby saving millions in rocket fuel.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 18, 2017, 03:33:27 pm
Only the humans themselves fall up. Their clothes don't, but that doesn't matter as the weight from the clothes they wear isn't that much compared to the weight of the actual human being.

Upwards movement is opposed by the usual air resistance and pressure effects. Not enough to stop falling up, I would think.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Reelya on July 18, 2017, 10:18:41 pm
If you're outside and fall for 10 seconds at 1g, that's 500 metres, so anyone outside would fly 500 metres into the sky then plummet to their deaths when gravity resumed (you'd be doing about 100 m/s at impact). Anyone indoors e.g. in bed or in a chair would fall face/head first into the ceiling. Then 10 seconds later, you slam back to the floor. People in cars with seatbelts would be the safest, however it's likely that many car accidents (etc) would occur and fires etc would break out (because of people dropping cigarettes, and otherwise knocking fire-starting things over. There wouldn't be enough hospital staff left to cope with close to 100% of the population being injured to some degree, so i'd imagine disease would break out too.

So the first year it would depopulate large chunks of the Earth. People would rebuild, but ... on the second year it's unlikely that anyone is expecting it to happen at exactly that time, and so much of society would be devastated that perhaps they aren't prepared for it. The population would dwindle over several years but eventually people would work it out and I'd imagine life would be a lot like before, but with extra precautions around that time of year.

And I imagine some form of religious belief or cult would form around the incident, perhaps heretics / criminals would be left outdoors at that time of year as a form of execution.

Another possibility would be to turn it into a sport / thrillride. Wear a parachute and wait for the lift, then pull the chord and sail back down.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Adragis on July 19, 2017, 06:16:06 am
Hypothetical scenario: You are in a locked room with no windows, no door, and five-foot-thick titanium walls with an orange, a knife, and nothing else. Inside the room you will never die, but you will never interact with anyone.
What would you do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Criptfeind on July 19, 2017, 06:19:40 am
Nothing I guess.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Adragis on July 19, 2017, 06:34:53 am
You fool!

You simply cut the orange in half, and put both halves together to make a whole.

Then you put the whole on the wall and escape.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Criptfeind on July 19, 2017, 06:47:27 am
That's not how oranges work.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Adragis on July 19, 2017, 07:52:42 am
That's not how oranges work.

Oh wow!
Look at this person, they're so intelligent!
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on July 19, 2017, 08:01:37 am
That's not how oranges work.

Oh wow!
Look at this person, they're so intelligent!
you should take the orange, cut it in half, put them together to make a whole, and then shove it right into your a...
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Adragis on July 19, 2017, 08:19:40 am
That's not how oranges work.

Oh wow!
Look at this person, they're so intelligent!
you should take the orange, cut it in half, put them together to make a whole, and then shove it right into your a...

That's not how holes work.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Criptfeind on July 19, 2017, 08:37:38 am
No, that's exactly how how holes work.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Adragis on July 19, 2017, 08:39:45 am
No, that's exactly how how holes work.

But oranges don't?
What about a whole orange?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Criptfeind on July 19, 2017, 08:53:13 am
I mean it might take a bit of stretching but oranges are squishy, it'd probably work.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Adragis on July 19, 2017, 09:01:06 am
Ah, you misunderstand. I mean, if you've already made the hole, you can't pick it up, right?




Also, new (not-a-terrible-joke) scenario which may have been done and is overused anyway:

You can either eradicate death by old age, or eliminate harm done by malicious violence. This applies to everybody currently alive and who will be alive in the future. Nobody will know you did it.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 19, 2017, 09:24:05 am
Eliminate harm done by malicious violence.

Eliminating death by old age, I think, would lead to overpopulation. Just because you can't age to death doesn't mean you can't starve... also, Face of Boe issue. If you keep aging, but can't ever die...

Eliminating harm done by malicious violence has its own issues, but it's a lot easier for society to work around.

Would boxers have malice for each other in the ring?

Police could still inflict harm if necessary if they were properly trained, if their violence had no malice behind it... "we just want to help you!".

Though admittedly, I can't even know if police would be necessary. Well, I can guess, but... does stealing count as harm to somebody, and is the act of it malicious violence?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Criptfeind on July 19, 2017, 09:30:54 am
Yeah. I don't think we're ready for "death via old age" to not be a thing... After all, "old age" is really a lot of different conditions that either slowly or quickly build up to death... If it only stopped the last thing that actually killed you we'd eventually have a bunch of crippled old people on the edge of death... That'd be pretty horrifying.

Harm by malicious violence though... Yeah, that's sounds okay. The key word here would be malicious. There's A LOT of harm done that I'm not sure we're ready to remove from society, but often it's hard to qualify such things as malicious. So. I think that'd be an okay thing to remove.

Would boxers have malice for each other in the ring?

That'd be an interesting side effect of it, because I'd say normally no. But certainly if some have a real beef with each other, they might be ironically unable to harm each other.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 19, 2017, 09:35:42 am
"And boxer Harris is unaffected whatsoever by boxer Harry's punch! Looks like that punch had some malice behind it!"

There are other issues. What defines harm? If one were to attempt to kill another player in Minecraft, with malice(I want your diamonds!), would any damage occur?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on July 19, 2017, 11:44:43 am
I'd  elliminate FallacyofUrist by malicious violence.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Adragis on July 19, 2017, 04:56:37 pm
"And boxer Harris is unaffected whatsoever by boxer Harry's punch! Looks like that punch had some malice behind it!"

There are other issues. What defines harm? If one were to attempt to kill another player in Minecraft, with malice(I want your diamonds!), would any damage occur?

Let me clarify, then:

Eternal youth and good health for all, or inability to be physically injured without giving consent.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 19, 2017, 06:53:08 pm
Malicious violence, because death by old age is like the failsafe to life it's there for a good reason.

::EDIT::
You can definitely pick up that hole if you grip it by the orange.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: crazyabe on July 19, 2017, 06:55:26 pm
PTW
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 20, 2017, 08:23:07 am
Well, eternal youth and good health for all is still nasty. Overpopulation is going to be a thing. Especially if that good health can't be removed in any way. I'm still going for the second one.

New hypothetical!
You've been granted the opportunity to grant humanity one of several boons. You have also been granted the opportunity to curse humanity in some way, in exchange for choosing another boon. What would you choose, if any?

Boon of Advancement: Humanity enters a 100-year scientific golden age when you choose this, speeding up scientific progress threefold and increasing how much new and old technology spreads across the world.
Boon of Vigor: Old age ceases to be an inhibiting factor(beyond the fact that it eventually kills you). All the elderly, present and future, now retain the vigor, the vitality, the intelligence, the whatnot, of their younger selves. This doesn't prevent death by old age, but that death is now a painless occurrence that occurs in one's sleep.
Boon of Magic: The supernatural comes to the world. People who study enough can learn to use magic based on their personality. It is a long and arduous process, lasting many years of study and spiritual and mental meditation, but for some, it's worth it.
Boon of Preservation: Humanity is prevented from experiencing apocalypses from now on. Humanity will not experience any apocalypse other than the destruction of their planet via expanding star, as a result of manipulated luck. An apocalypse is defined as any event that lays waste to an entire continent or more, leaving 80% or more of the people within dead.
Boon of Potential: Particularly driven humans who express their determination in some extreme manner will receive the power you know as the Gamer. Various caps are in effect to prevent growth to extreme(read: capable of causing an apocalypse) levels, but it's still quite the power, given just how fast those with the power advance. Should they lose their determination, their power will fade gradually unless they gain their determination back, at which point the power returns in force.
Boon of Wishes: One person other than you of your choice gets an antique lamp, that, when rubbed, unveils a genie. Only the person you choose can make wishes using the genie, however. The genie offers four wishes. The first wish will be granted according to the wish maker's desires completely. The second wish will be granted utterly literally. The third wish will be granted in a horrendous, monkey's paw manner. The fourth wish will only work for 24 hours, unless it is intended to undo the effects of an earlier wish. If anybody other than you and the person you choose learns about the magical properties of the lamp, the lamp explodes. If the person you choose learns that you know the magical properties of the lamp, the lamp explodes. If the genie is asked to resurrect the dead or mind control people, the lamp explodes. If a wish is made for the genie to be freed... well, it may be a good idea, but it depends on what wish is used. Wishes cannot remove Boons or Curses, nor can they accomplish anything on the scale of a Boon or Curse. If a wish is made for more wishes, the lamp explodes.

Curse of Silence: No human can speak, present and forevermore. This also applies to singing and any method of vocalization whatsoever. This also applies to using mechanical devices to create a voice for oneself. Other methods of communication are not effected. The magic detailed in the Boon of Magic often depends on speech, but not always. Furthermore, the sense of hearing of every human being is weakened, and cannot be remedied with hearing aides.
Curse of Conflict: Humanity will never unify into a single government. The fewest governments humanity can be divided into is 4. Luck manipulation will ensure this. Furthermore, governments will constantly be at edge with each other unless they have very strong diplomatic ties, and governments cannot merge except by conquering the other.
Curse of Lycanthropy: Various strains of werecreature disease spread across the world. The strains cannot be cured(not even with magic or super tech or Potential), but it is possible to prevent the disease from taking hold if medical treatment is applied within 24 hours of receiving a werecreature bite. Those with the Gamer power from Potential can learn to exert some(but not complete) control over their were form and learn to change into it outside of the full moon.
Curse of Boon: A random boon other than the ones already chosen and the Boon of Wishes is applied to humanity for 2d40 years. At the end of that time, the boon is removed, and its removal will come as a great shock to humanity, causing devastation(but not a full-scale apocalypse). Furthermore, the boon applied via this curse will have some drawback that makes it much less of a benefit.
Curse of Incursion: Every 3 months, a portal appears somewhere on Earth and some horrible threat from another universe spills out before the portal closes. It will never be apocalyptic in scale, but it won't be good at all for the local area.
Curse of Villain: Some human will utilize the benefits of what Boons you've chosen to become a great villain, one only old age will stop. Whether the villain will be hammy or truly evil is up to the Villain. Whenever the current Villain dies, another one will arise in 10 years. The Villain will always be a significant threat to the nation he or she is in.
Curse of Sloth: Humanity, as a collective, moves more and more towards laziness. There will always be exceptions to the rule, but they will be rare.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Adragis on July 20, 2017, 08:34:12 am
Boon of Advancement, bam, done.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Criptfeind on July 20, 2017, 09:08:57 am
Yeah. Boon of advancement seems like pretty okay. I mean... Arguably we're on a course towards self annihilation via science and a rapid increase in technology without time for testing is probably not going to help. But civilizations already in a death spiral right now and seems to need some technological shizwazee to fix it anyway... So, a gamble, but seems worth taking.

Boon of Vigor... Okay. It'd have pretty profound impacts on a lot of thing, including some bad things (arguably with old people able to enforce their will for longer and better social progress will slow down... But maybe not.)

Boon of preservation... Well. That's. A very hard to predict one if it'd be good or bad... But I'd go for it.

Magic and Potential both sound like curses of dictators and bullshit. Pass. Maybe if I specifically got to be a super human person in these scenarios I'd have to decide if I'm greedy enough to fuck up humanity for my own gain... But one can't assume that.

Wishes also sounds awful.

I think the best would be advancement... Although preservation is also temping... Curses wise... Curse of boon might not be TOO bad. Since it doesn't last for too long. Curse of Lycanthropy if you're taking preservation also seems like it'd be okay. I mean... A bit of genocide there. But preservation would keep it from explosively spreading so it'd probably eventually be wiped out. Hum.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on July 20, 2017, 01:21:05 pm
Advancement, Magic, Lycanthropy.

Sounds like the one with the most cool shit happening. Don't see how Magic is going to make more dictators and bullshit than Advancement. Lycanthropy can be pretty easily managed, especially with the help of the two boons. Advancement pretty much covers Vigor by itself.
Why would you ever pick Wishes, it's just terrible.

Also Advancement + Magic is probably the best bet to let us figure out how the Boon-Granting Mechanism works, and abuse the hell out of it.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Criptfeind on July 20, 2017, 04:39:21 pm
Don't see how Magic is going to make more dictators and bullshit than Advancement.

Cuz with magic you're going to get a select group of people with unfathomable reality breaking powers that don't make sense. Now. Arguably that already sorta exists in a way. A dude flying around throwing fireballs isn't more impressive then a fighter jet. But random mage dude doesn't need nearly the support structure and build up that technology does.

And just like, magic man. You never know. Man meditates for 20 years, gains power to force everyone within 200 miles commit suicide? Stuff like that etc. It's just complete bullshit. It personally discomforts me, at least with advancement, no one will ever know.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 24, 2017, 01:58:54 pm
New hypothetical.

You gain up to 3 supernatural abilities of your choice, subject to the limitation that it must be summed up in one to two words. For each ability you choose, a malicious supernatural entity enters Earth in New York City with the power you choose. What do you choose, if any?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 24, 2017, 02:37:46 pm
Does the supernatural entity have the same powers you do, or do you get to choose their powers too?

Because I'm giving my nemesis the uncontrollable ability to spontaneously create cheap hotdog stands in relevant locations. My two-word powers will be summed up as "Dr. Manhattan".

::EDIT::
If they have to have the same powers as me, we both get the hotdogs.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: IcyTea31 on July 24, 2017, 03:57:34 pm
Advancement, Preservation, Conflict.

Advancement because it has a high chance of providing effects similar to other Boons with its science and technology, and more. Vigor is theoretically doable, Magic is arguably already here, and Potential is plausible if unlikely.

Preservation to avoid the dangers of too rapid scientific advance, as well as to diminish the effects of Conflict. The way it's worded, it seems it applies to any planet we settle on, so it's a cool 5 million or so years to get ourselves around a red dwarf or similarly stable body.

The Curse of Conflict really isn't that bad, especially when coupled with Preservation. It's in human nature to disagree on things, so a single government would either be totalitarian or horribly inefficient at providing to people's needs. Wars and dictators will arise, but will never end the world and won't fully conquer it either.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on July 24, 2017, 06:34:31 pm
Superpower: "Obey Egan."
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 24, 2017, 07:26:03 pm
I have to wonder how many people named Egan are in the world. More than just you, probably.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on July 25, 2017, 12:29:46 am
Usually it's a last name, though. It's somewhat possible that nobody else would qualify for the power, and if they do I ain't telling them. :V
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 25, 2017, 12:20:40 pm
*Legally changes name to Egan*
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Imic on July 26, 2017, 02:52:36 am
I you had a tardis, what would you do? When would you go?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: scriver on July 26, 2017, 03:16:39 am
No matter what or who you've been
No matter when or where you've seen
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 26, 2017, 12:13:07 pm
1955 to bet on baseball.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Draignean on July 26, 2017, 10:37:50 pm
It always feels like.... somebody's watching me!
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 28, 2017, 06:12:41 pm
New hypothetical: The oceans are rising for no apparent reason. By 2050, only some mountains will be above water even partially. What you do? What world do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 28, 2017, 07:07:24 pm
Make reason apparent through science.

Solve reason.

If this fails, build an ark.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on July 28, 2017, 08:31:23 pm
Create portal at the bottom of the sea with the other end being mars.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: IcyTea31 on July 29, 2017, 07:05:54 am
World: Rebuild major cities and infrastructure from pressure-resistant, sealed materials. Develop genemodding tech to adapt the next generations of children to life under the sea. Continue business as usual.

Myself: buy/lease land in the mountains, capitalize on tourism to the mythical Dry Land.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Caz on July 29, 2017, 09:33:06 am
Quote
New hypothetical: The oceans are rising for no apparent reason. By 2050, only some mountains will be above water even partially. What you do? What world do?

(http://i.imgur.com/5YIDZ1F.jpg)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Neonivek on July 29, 2017, 09:34:23 am
I am PRETTY sure we are doomed in that scenario outright... Without possible way to recover.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Caz on July 29, 2017, 01:22:53 pm
All I could do is save for a large boat, learn to fish, and make some sort of boat greenhouse thing for some plants. The only thing I could see helping more than just me is a lot of research being thrown into underwater habitats, and even then there'd NEVER be enough for all 7 billion for us to survive.

Live on lots of floaty platforms, harvest tidal energy, get destroyed by superstorms, whales inherit the earth.

I do wonder where all this water is coming from if it's appearing fast enough to put most of the earth underwater by 2050. No airpressure 4 u
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 29, 2017, 01:47:00 pm
Obviously its raining. That's where water comes from, you know. Clouds.

Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: martinuzz on July 29, 2017, 02:49:56 pm
Rain, from clouds? Whaha hilarious, who made you believe that?. Everyone knows rain comes from God having her period.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: IcyTea31 on July 30, 2017, 09:39:16 am
Actually, if you look at a bottle of water, it has a picture of a mountain on it. And the hypothetical specifically says only mountains will be above water. Coincidence? I think not! Wake up sheeple, the water conspiracy is the mountains' fault!
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on August 02, 2017, 04:21:55 pm
New hypothetical. In each of five locations(the United States, Brazil, Cuba, Australia, Antartica), portals 10 feet tall and wide open to locations in a life-supporting alien world about 1.2 times the size of earth. Yes, it can support human life. Within a week of each portal opening, at least one person notices them and puts the location on the internet(except Antartica, which takes 3 months). What happens?

Plot twist one: The new planet is inhabited by a few thousand sentient beings, the last survivors of their civilization. Apparently, the civilization opened the portals accidentally and the societal panic destroyed their society.

Plot twist two: Some of the fruit that grows in the alien world is of a quality Earth has never seen.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on August 02, 2017, 06:43:44 pm
We 100% kill each other over who gets the best fruit, but only after we kill the remaining natives.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: martinuzz on August 02, 2017, 06:50:06 pm
But what if the natives are even tastier than the fruit?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on August 07, 2017, 04:20:34 pm
New hypothetical.

You can gain one fictional item of your choice, provided it is in a book and the item can fit through the book it's in. What would you choose?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on August 07, 2017, 04:25:01 pm
The One Ring.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on August 07, 2017, 04:28:12 pm
Mind controls you. Congrats, you're now a thrall of Sauron who's trying to use you to figure out how to get into your universe.

Or at least I think that's how it works.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on August 07, 2017, 04:56:52 pm
Slightly abusing the meaning of "book", I grab the master sword from an artbook that came with a special edition of some zelda game, and use it to slay the evil that Hans just brought into the world.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on August 07, 2017, 07:42:18 pm
One fully loaded Infinity Gauntlet, please.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Imic on August 07, 2017, 07:44:36 pm
Everyone knows rain comes from God having her period.
Sigged.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: scriver on August 08, 2017, 12:58:19 am
The Tinker's bag of tricks. (https://imgur.com/gallery/s5Xco)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: IcyTea31 on August 08, 2017, 02:14:50 am
A Wand of Wishing from Nethack's user manual. With one wish reserved for a blessed scroll of charging, I'm left with 4-6 wishes to follow the usual guidelines for Nethack-style wishes. I'll have all of the items other people mentioned above, thank you very much, unless I can come up with something better.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: AzyWng on August 08, 2017, 11:02:19 am
Thinking small:

A handgun.

They always hollow out books for that sort of thing in spy flicks, right?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on August 09, 2017, 10:55:31 am
Mind controls you. Congrats, you're now a thrall of Sauron who's trying to use you to figure out how to get into your universe.

Or at least I think that's how it works.

That's okay because now I am motherfucking Sauron with his Ring, in a universe where Mount Doom doesn't exist. Or elves. Checkmate, bitches.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on August 09, 2017, 12:46:40 pm
It's not like throwing the ring into mount doom is the only way to defeat sauron, especially with all the other fictional stuff we're bringing in.
Ahem. Point being, Sword What Seals The Darkness seals the darkness.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on August 09, 2017, 01:35:57 pm
It's not like throwing the ring into mount doom is the only way to defeat sauron, especially with all the other fictional stuff we're bringing in.
Ahem. Point being, Sword What Seals The Darkness seals the darkness.

Master Sword was forged by sealing away the literal personification of evil, it can probably handle Sauron.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on October 06, 2017, 08:45:07 pm
New hypothetical.

Whenever a person dies, their body explodes. Think "hand grenade". How does society change?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Strife26 on October 06, 2017, 09:35:40 pm
Maybe pull out one of the Swords of Power? Shieldbreaker or Coinspinner would be pretty cool.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MrRoboto75 on October 06, 2017, 09:37:20 pm
New hypothetical.

Whenever a person dies, their body explodes. Think "hand grenade". How does society change?

The necromancer in diablo 2 would have a different skill.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: IcyTea31 on October 07, 2017, 02:37:18 am
How soon does the body explode? The scenario is wildly different depending on if it's on the last breath or, say, 5 minutes later. You could go even closer and say that receiving an unsurvivable wound counts as "being already dead" even if you're still showing life signs.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TheDarkStar on October 07, 2017, 02:43:10 am
New hypothetical.

Whenever a person dies, their body explodes. Think "hand grenade". How does society change?

No more crowds - getting within 10 feet of another person without their consent is illegal.

Retirement homes no longer exist and are replaced by small villages with one house per person.

Hospitals throw nearly-dead people down a pit. Or they keep everyone on life support. Or they simply don't exist.

War is... messier. In terms of casualties, of course - the actual bodies aren't really left over.

Not even polar bears hunt humans.

Depending on the details, pregnancy is really dangerous.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: martinuzz on October 07, 2017, 04:32:31 am
That gives a whole new meaning to the term 'baby-boom'
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Reelya on October 07, 2017, 09:00:51 am
Terrorist attacks would be much worse. But people will be more scared to clump together too, balancing that out.

Public transport popularity will plummet.

Complaints amount "manspreading" taking up seats will pleasantly disappear to be replaced by paranoia about people who like to sit too close.

However, oil drilling and construction work safety standards will be rigidly enforced for the first goddamn time.

Also consider diseases. Dyssentry and cholera sufferers now explode.

Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: scriver on October 07, 2017, 09:56:46 am
They explode in a rain of virulent body fluids at that.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TheDarkStar on October 07, 2017, 11:26:13 am
All diseases become Ebola.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Trekkin on October 07, 2017, 12:05:10 pm
New hypothetical.

Whenever a person dies, their body explodes. Think "hand grenade". How does society change?

The Republicans' support for alternative energy skyrockets.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on October 07, 2017, 07:47:47 pm
All diseases become Ebola.
Diseases would get a big advantage if they kill the victim, unlike how things work now. Expect more deadly diseases to evolve, due to the new possibility of spreading via human shrapnel.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on October 07, 2017, 08:18:40 pm
Suicide bombing would become both cheaper and more cost-effective (increased chance of causing chain reactions).

... Actually, due to chain reactions, wouldnt there be a high impact on military tactics? In general  it would be dangerous to stay close to any of your mates. A well placed shot might cause a chain reaction that wipes out a whole battalion.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Reelya on October 07, 2017, 08:25:52 pm
Real military don't bunch up like keystone cops, haven't done for a long time.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on October 07, 2017, 08:31:41 pm
Yes, but you don´t need to stick really close to each other for a chain reaction, considering bone sharpnel and the like...
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Reelya on October 07, 2017, 08:46:09 pm
But that would probably only wound you then, and soldiers wear helmets / body armour these days.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Strife26 on October 07, 2017, 09:00:56 pm
Yes, but you don´t need to stick really close to each other for a chain reaction, considering bone sharpnel and the like...

The hypothetical is listed as hand grenade power, which is basically the exact thing modern TTP's space for.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on October 07, 2017, 09:05:19 pm
But a human body has far more potential sharpnel. AKA bone spear  (https://j.gifs.com/mZxMzr.gif)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Strife26 on October 07, 2017, 09:17:37 pm
Yes, but it's not bone optimized for use as shrapnel
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on October 07, 2017, 09:24:04 pm
Well, now that you mention it, living bone IS kind of rubbery. It probably wouldnt have much penetration power
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Strife26 on October 07, 2017, 10:00:28 pm
Does DF model different material values for living versus deceased bone?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on October 09, 2017, 06:11:18 pm
How soon does the body explode? The scenario is wildly different depending on if it's on the last breath or, say, 5 minutes later. You could go even closer and say that receiving an unsurvivable wound counts as "being already dead" even if you're still showing life signs.
We can go with two different hypotheticals: Last breath, and 10 seconds later.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: AzyWng on October 09, 2017, 07:14:07 pm
How soon does the body explode? The scenario is wildly different depending on if it's on the last breath or, say, 5 minutes later. You could go even closer and say that receiving an unsurvivable wound counts as "being already dead" even if you're still showing life signs.
We can go with two different hypotheticals: Last breath, and 10 seconds later.

So if someone's head was cut off or if their brains were blown out would that immediately trigger an explosion/an explosion 10 seconds later?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on October 09, 2017, 07:43:05 pm
Yes.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: IcyTea31 on October 10, 2017, 02:34:53 am
What if they later rise as zombies and are subsequently re-killed?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TheDarkStar on October 10, 2017, 02:41:09 am
What if they later rise as zombies and are subsequently re-killed?

I'm not sure vaporized bits of dead body are reanimatable. Aside from random pieces of unconnected muscle, there wouldn't be enough left to cause anything resembling movement.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: IcyTea31 on October 10, 2017, 03:47:51 am
An explosion the strength of a hand grenade doesn't vaporize a human body. I'm sure a clever necromancer could sew it together well enough.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Paxiecrunchle on October 11, 2017, 07:12:12 am
PTW
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on October 13, 2017, 06:35:55 pm
New hypothetical: Tiny superpowers!

A tenth of the population suddenly gains tiny superpowers. Think "one pound of telekinesis", "target hears imaginary music for a few seconds", "self-destruct target cell phone, 1 day cooldown". How does this impact society?

Variation: Only members of Bay 12 gained the powers, but all of them did. Someone who joins Bay 12 henceforth does not gain a power, but someone who deletes their account loses their power. Does this have differences from the above scenario?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on October 13, 2017, 06:40:44 pm
Toady starts a little justice league and bans anyone who doesn't join.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MetalSlimeHunt on October 13, 2017, 06:41:31 pm
Within one month the most reckless and foolish of our members provide a clear enough data trail to identify that people on Bay 12 were given superpowers. We are henceforth almost all kidnapped and experimented on by various intelligence agencies, with people outside nations allied to the United States having the best chance at escaping. They will likely fruitlessly attempt to replicate our abilities to the point of torture.

Worst case scenario: Biological immortality is invented in the 21st century and we are indefinitely kept in blacksites constantly being cut up in scientific experiments.

Best case scenario: Fevered investigations into the nature of Bay 12 lead to the accidental destruction of the server rack and thus everybody's accounts. We are all most likely executed to protect state secrets.

Most best case scenario: I immediately drop off the grid when I realize what's happening and find a way to bootstrap my power into world conquest, freeing some of you along the way and gaining your service by offering you acceptance and power.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: scriver on October 14, 2017, 11:47:09 am
World Conquest, one exploded mobile phone per day at a time.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on October 18, 2017, 05:20:11 pm
New hypothetical: You can choose to remove, permanently, one concept from every human being's mind... except yours and seven other randomly selected human beings. Would you choose to do so, and if so, what concept?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Trekkin on October 18, 2017, 06:11:39 pm
New hypothetical: You can choose to remove, permanently, one concept from every human being's mind... except yours and seven other randomly selected human beings. Would you choose to do so, and if so, what concept?

Yes: morality. Remove the idea that "good" and "evil" are anything other than cognitive shortcuts to stop us having to think through the consequences of our actions, and with it goes the idea that some propositions are unthinkable or some positions must be accepted axiomatically. Rather than whiny opining about what we (or, generally, everyone else) "should" do or smarmy appeals to "principles", let us instead accept that we do as we wish, and instead focus on what is likely to get us what we want and with what side effects.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: scriver on October 18, 2017, 06:43:54 pm
So basically you want to replace morality with... morality. Okay, makes sense.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Helgoland on October 18, 2017, 06:47:10 pm
The notion of absolute truth. People would immediately understand the scientific method, and we'd quickly find ways to deal with all the PoMo weirdness. Also folks' communication skills would improve since they'd no longer assume the other person thinks the same way they do.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MetalSlimeHunt on October 18, 2017, 07:35:55 pm
The notion of absolute truth. People would immediately understand the scientific method, and we'd quickly find ways to deal with all the PoMo weirdness. Also folks' communication skills would improve since they'd no longer assume the other person thinks the same way they do.
The year is 2038. It has been 21 years since the beginning of the Grand Malaise, though now most know it as the Suicide Plague. The human race now stands at 2.3 billion members, with a global average fertility rate of 0.15. It has been 18 years since mainstream politicians began accepting endorsements from the Voluntary Human Extinction Movement. It has been 12 years since the cults were legalized, and 9 since they were granted public education exclusivity. It has been 4 years since emergency services were formally pulled from rural areas. It has been 1 year since the production of alcohol was outlawed.

The only fields which are experiencing growth are reality show production, weapons sales, and formal philosophy.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Reelya on October 19, 2017, 10:45:35 pm
The real problem is that removing any concept is the same as removing any emotion from a human. The idea of removing "fear" from a person sounds great - they'll be brave from now on. Until they start sticking their hands in a fire because they aren't concerned about the consequences. Think about what car travel / pedestrians would be like if nobody had the concept of fear?

Personally, I think removing something as big as the concept of truth from the minds of all humans would have a similar-level effect to that. "Truth" is the sense of that something can be known, e.g. that it can be predicted, and since it can be predicted, you can fall back on heuristics to quickly determine what's compatible with that. With no sense of truth, humans would become a race of neurotics. e.g. people would wake up and lie in bed because they can't be sure life outside bed exists. They wouldn't put shoes on because shoes could just be an illusion. You'd have to have that debate every morning. Because when you take away "absolute truth" it is taken away for the big questions, but also the small question that we normally don't ask.

So you definitely don't want to mess with things by removing a core part of human psychology that people use to navigate the world unless you want a disaster world where nobody can function at a basic level of normality. You want to remove one more or less useless concept which also causes problems. "Tribalism" which underlies patriotism/nationalism/bigotry would be my choice. However, then the consequences would be that groups aren't cohesive, e.g. things like special interest clubs wouldn't be stable since members wouldn't feel the need to associate with other members more than with a random person they don't know. Still less disruptive than removing "truth" but with most of the benefits.

The notion of absolute truth. People would immediately understand the scientific method, and we'd quickly find ways to deal with all the PoMo weirdness. Also folks' communication skills would improve since they'd no longer assume the other person thinks the same way they do.

Well you can say that, but just removing the concept of truth doesn't mean people would understand jack shit, sorry to say. They might as easily turn to scrying magical chicken guts or something. Then if the reading is disliked, read more chicken guts until you get one you like. Then you turn around and say "go for the scientific method it's better than chicken guts!" and they go "oh really? well that's just one theory".
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on October 20, 2017, 07:29:47 pm
I want to remove the notion that a Furby can be anything other than intrinsically terrifying.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on October 21, 2017, 07:24:54 pm
New hypothetical: You can make it so that all games on Steam are and will forever be free for you and you only with no repercussions, in exchange for causing all movies and television programs to be invisible and inaudible to your eyes. Would you do so?

Double new hypothetical: You receive a magic calendar in the mail. It lists three future dates and events attached to them: November 19, 2020, invention of 50% reliable perfect cancer cure, January 3 2059, asteroid approaches earth and has a 20% chance of hitting and causing the apocalypse, March 5 2070, the Singularity. The calendar's magic allows you to either erase one of the dates from occurrence or move two of the dates either closer to or further from now. What would you do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Reelya on October 21, 2017, 09:53:14 pm
I would certainly not do that. Free steam games isn't worth losing all other major media. Because I can earn money to get the steam games I want, plus there isn't enough time to play them all, and most of them suck anyway. Whereas not being able to see any tv, movies or anime would not be something fixable with money.

As for the second one it's not very balanced.

-  November 19, 2020, invention of 50% reliable perfect cancer cure (good thing, soon) - not worth removing or advancing
- January 3 2059, asteroid approaches earth and has a 20% chance of hitting and causing the apocalypse (bad thing, distant) - worth removing
- March 5 2070, the Singularity (good thing, distant) - worth advancing

So the question really boils down to just whether you'd prefer to advance the date of the singularity decades earlier, or remove a 20% chance of Earth being destroyed before that. In terms of preparing for the worst-case scenario you'd remove the asteroid completely. A few extra years of singularity isn't worth a 20% chance of destroying the Earth.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on October 21, 2017, 09:58:27 pm
Now, if I wanted to play every game for free while keeping access to other media I could just be a remorseless pirate. And taking that deal is gonna look mighty silly if Steam ever shuts down.

For the other one, suppose I'd shove the singularity to tomorrow and the asteroid to the same day that the earth is going to be destroyed by the sun expanding. That seems to maximize the chance of humanity surviving. "Singularity" is a pretty vague term, of course.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Reelya on October 21, 2017, 10:00:54 pm
Heh, I assumed the time-moving would be a reasonable amount myself. However if there's no limit on how far you can move things, you're right! Why not make the asteroid it 10 trillion years away and the singularity tomorrow?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TheDarkStar on October 21, 2017, 10:07:57 pm
Why not move the asteroid's impact really really far in the future (Graham's Number years away?) to ensure that the universe won't end before then (because if the earth and asteroid are gone, then they couldn't collide).
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on October 21, 2017, 10:25:19 pm
I assume that because the asteroid is fated to collide with earth, you can only pick a date at which the earth will still exist. If you can move the collision farther back while keeping that fate... uh, eternal Earth I guess?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Maximum Spin on October 21, 2017, 10:27:56 pm
You know, with everyone else I know, "Singularity" means (well other than a black hole, which is more common of course) "robots become superintelligent and take over the world and probably destroy humanity".

So with that in mind I'd definitely move it closer and put off this whole "curing cancer" business until after the robots cure cancer by exterminating all life.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TheDarkStar on October 21, 2017, 10:46:22 pm
Another solution:

Move the asteroid to the past. If it already had a 20% chance to hit the earth but you're still around, obviously it missed.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on November 08, 2017, 02:33:12 pm
New hypothetical.

In one month, every human on the planet capable of conscious thought, above the age of 13, and below the age of 80 will immediately want to kill you, and will become willing to do whatever is necessary in order to kill you, short of using nuclear weapons. Every human affected by this will value killing you higher than everything else, including their own life. This madness will fade in one month after it starts.

Your advantages:
Your learning speed will be overclocked for the month before the madness. To be precise, your learning speed will be fifty times what it normally is.
Your body will be restored to a pristine state the day the madness begins, and this will occur again every Sunday.
You may select three supernatural abilities from the below list which you will have for the duration of the month of madness.
-Invisibility. You may turn yourself and everything you touch invisible for up to an hour. Cooldown for use is equal to the amount of time you used the ability.
-Dopplegangers. Once per day, you may create 3 copies of yourself that follow your orders which will last for the next 6 hours. They are indistinguishable from you in appearance, possess all of your skills, but do not possess any of your powers. When one of them is killed, you will remember everything that clone experienced.
-Possession. Once per day, you may possess a person, taking full control over their body for up to 6 hours. When you leave their body, their memories of the time in which they were possessed will be wiped. If the person you are possessing is killed, you will be expelled from their body but will not be killed yourself.
-Teleportation. Once per week, you may touch a photograph and instantly teleport yourself to wherever it was taken.
-Reload. Once per day, if you would die, your mind is sent back in time into your body as of the last time you awoke from sleep. Ability cooldowns remain in effect when this triggers.
-Sanity. Once per day, you may free one person you touch from the madness, and grant them a copy of any power you possess other than Sanity.
-Invulnerability. Once per day, you may become immune to all physical harm for 30 minutes.
-Resources. Once per three days, you may designate a container. 1000$ worth of objects will be created inside that container. You may write a "wish list" and put it inside the container before using this ability if you wish to exert more control over what you receive.
-Shapeshift. Once per day, you may take the physical form of a mammal you touch some part of for 6 hours. If that mammal wears clothes, your clothes will shift to become the clothes that mammal most recently wore until the hours end, if that mammal doesn't wear clothes, your clothes will vanish and then reappear on you when those six hours end.
-Shelter. Once per week, you may transform a door into an extradimensional portal leading to a safe haven that will last one day. At the end of that day, if you are still in the haven, you will be expelled from it. The haven cannot be accessed by people seeking to kill you.
-Network. Every member of Bay 12 and one other online forum of your choice is freed from the madness, and you may send and receive telepathic messages with them.

If you survive the month, you may choose one ability you had during the month to keep, and you may opt to restore to life any people you killed during the month.

If you want additional powers, you may choose an additional power in exchange for creating Huntsmen. For the duration of the month, 5 of the people seeking to kill you will become Huntsmen and have two special Hunter powers each, in addition to leadership talent, superhuman strength, speed, stamina, and senses.
-Direction: Once per two days the Hunter may learn what direction you are in.
-Pinpoint: Once per week the Hunter may learn your exact location in longitude and latitude coordinates.
-Unfoolable: Once per day the Hunter may enter a state in which they can see you even if you're invisible, determine if someone who appears to be you is a Doppleganger or not, know if someone they look at is Possessed, know if a creature they look at is you shapeshifted into that form, and know if someone is lying to them. This state lasts for 3 hours.
-Madness: Once per day the Hunter may undo the effect of Sanity or Network on a person they touch.
-Resurrection. Once per week, if the Hunter is killed, they will come back to life the next day.
-Sacrifice. If the Hunter touches you, they may sacrifice their own life instantly to permanently remove one of your powers and make your exact location known to all other Hunters.
-Hunt. Once per day, the Hunter can shapeshift into a carnivorous mammal of their choice for 3 hours, and shapeshift up to 7 other people other than you, within a radius of 100 feet of them, into that mammal as well for 3 hours as well.
-Bless. Once per three days, the Hunter can grant a non-Hunter one Hunter power of their choice, permanently. This can only be used once on a given person.
-Iron. Once per day, the Hunter can become immune to all physical harm for 1 hour.

What do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: bloop_bleep on November 08, 2017, 02:44:03 pm
...

This could very easily be a forum game.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on November 08, 2017, 02:50:06 pm
Take every power, proceed with the awesome action movie antics.
Just a few powers with 1-day or longer cooldowns won't be enough, and 40 hunters isn't much on top of the entire population of earth.

If I somehow survive your insane deadly nightmare scenario I'd keep the Dopplegangers. Shelter is nice but has too long of a cooldown.

Oh! And for the additional forum given by Network I choose Facebook. Everyone I use Sanity on will be given Network and instructed to pick another forum maximizing for largest user base more than anything. Should be able to free a very sizable portion of people who use the internet that way.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on November 08, 2017, 06:28:06 pm
Oh! And for the additional forum given by Network I choose Facebook.
Ha. Didn't think of that.

Everyone I use Sanity on will be given Network and instructed to pick another forum maximizing for largest user base more than anything.
Didn't think of that either.

Take every power, proceed with the awesome action movie antics.
Just a few powers with 1-day or longer cooldowns won't be enough, and 40 hunters isn't much on top of the entire population of earth.
And finally I didn't think of that either. Although my intention was that you could only take an additional power once. Not that it changes much for your Networking.

This could very easily be a forum game.
I'll think about it. If it does become a forum game, I'm removing Network, good grief.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on November 08, 2017, 08:10:05 pm
I powergamed your game before it was a game! :P
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Helgoland on November 08, 2017, 08:46:30 pm
Shouldn't the solution look something like 'get a month's supply of water and oxygen, sink yourself into the ocean, teleport out on the last day'?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MetalSlimeHunt on November 08, 2017, 08:53:49 pm
The militaries of the world, having become united in the cause of hunting you down, will surely begin searching and depth charging every inch of the ocean they suspect you of hiding in. Joined by both merchant and civilian vessels, in fact.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Helgoland on November 08, 2017, 09:43:12 pm
every inch of the ocean they suspect you of hiding in.
Ah, there's the rub: No need to let them suspect anything. Fake your own death, teleport to prepared shipwreck somewhere.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MetalSlimeHunt on November 08, 2017, 09:48:15 pm
If they're crazy enough to do everything else, they're crazy enough to assume you faked your death. And a shipwreck, really? That's an obvious target. If I were crazy and hunting you under the sea, blowing up all the known Imperial German shipwrecks would be literally the first thing I'd advise Hunt Leader Mike Pence to do.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: bloop_bleep on November 08, 2017, 11:23:00 pm
Go to the ocean floor and kill the yeti crabs for food. With enough planning you could make a device that uses the thermal vents' energy to separate salt from the water and electrolyze the water to get oxygen. You could live in an under-seafloor bunker to avoid detection.

Also, with Urist's permission, I might make this into a forum game myself. I've never GMed before and I'm not sure if I'll have the time (or the motivation), but it's a possibility.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dorsidwarf on November 09, 2017, 06:25:05 am
The militaries of the world, having become united in the cause of hunting you down, will surely begin searching and depth charging every inch of the ocean they suspect you of hiding in. Joined by both merchant and civilian vessels, in fact.

This seems unlikely, considering that they only have a month to find you, and that the area of deep sea floor they have to search is about 300 million square kilometers, or well over half the surface area of earth. They never found MH370 after all, and while the search force wasnt "all the world's navies", the target area was also about a hundred times smaller, they had a rough idea of where the plane had gone, the target wasnt actively concealing itself from them, they knew what to look for, and had debris wash-ups to guess where it went down.

Plus, the whole world can't dedicate all its effort to searching the sea, because they can't be sure you're even in the sea as opposed to anywhere else on or below the earth. Plus I don't think depth charges exist that can be dropped the 2-4 kilometers that would be needed to hit you, nor are there enough depth charges to cover the whole ocean floor (around 1-300,000,000,000,000). Modern torpedoes have a crush depth of something like 8-1200 meters too so no firing torpedoes straight down.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Helgoland on November 09, 2017, 01:34:51 pm
Go to the ocean floor and kill the yeti crabs for food.
You don't need food, it's only a month.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on November 09, 2017, 09:49:12 pm
Now the real question is how are you going to survive on the ocean floor. Invulnerability is temporary, Shapeshift is temporary but longer, and Shelter is temporary but even longer. So you can survive down there for a little bit(if you use Shapeshift, you're going to need to touch a whale or something first), but good luck surviving a month unless you've seen some loophole in the powers I haven't.

Also, a little more food for thought.

If you haven't taken Network, the people of Bay 12 are going to want you dead too, and odds are one of them will remember having seen this hypothetical when the month starts...

If the Hunters are smart enough, they'll power game and all choose Bless. There's no rule stopping them from giving copies of Bless to other people.
Hunters basically nullify the ocean floor tactic if you choose to create them, Pinpoint and Direction can be used to figure out where you are so they can... do whatever they would do to kill someone on the ocean floor.
~~~
Also, with Urist's permission, I might make this into a forum game myself. I've never GMed before and I'm not sure if I'll have the time (or the motivation), but it's a possibility.
You have my permission. If you'd like, I could mentor you. I've done several forum games myself and could help run this game, I'm liking the concept.

"Literally everyone(okay, minus children and the elderly, but still) wants to kill you, and will use everything short of nukes in order to do so. You have but a few advantages. Good luck. You only need to survive for a month."
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Maximum Spin on November 09, 2017, 10:01:10 pm
Acquire large box, get inside box, sink box, use Resources to fill box with $1000 worth of oxygen and potable water.

If you can't use Resources on the box while inside it, get two boxes.

Also, the ocean is really big, nobody is going to be able to search the whole ocean for you.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on November 10, 2017, 05:14:40 am
Ocean wouldn't be a good place to hide because one Hunter with half a brain would shapeshift himself and seven people into megalodons. Or orcas. Sperm whales.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on November 10, 2017, 10:08:46 am
Acquire large box, get inside box, sink box...
What kind of box can survive the massive pressure at the sea floor?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Strife26 on November 10, 2017, 11:34:25 am
Acquire large box, get inside box, sink box...
What kind of box can survive the massive pressure at the sea floor?

The kind that's a lot more than a grand.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Helgoland on November 10, 2017, 01:10:30 pm
Find some sealed cave-like thing then, and teleport there. Or teleport to some desert island with a couple trees. Make the vastness of planet earth work in your favor.

Actually I guess what you could do is secretly assemble a reasonably big ball made of air-tight tarp, and teleport to the dark side of the moon (or some asteroid or whatever). You might want to bring a heater though. Or teleport to a sustainable sort of orbit around the sun, close enough to keep you warm. The photo condition can be dealt with by using photos from different seasons or from satellite probes.

The general trick is that your teleport is untraceable, really.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on November 10, 2017, 01:57:43 pm
Until a hunter pinpoints you in space and repurpose some ICBMs sans warheads to shoot you with an enormous kinetic projectile, that plan wouldn't be so bad. Except for the radiation. And searing heat slash bitter cold.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: bloop_bleep on November 10, 2017, 03:05:38 pm
Until a hunter pinpoints you in space and repurpose some ICBMs sans warheads to shoot you with an enormous kinetic projectile, that plan wouldn't be so bad. Except for the radiation. And searing heat slash bitter cold.

I don't think ICMBs can reach the moon just yet, given that there never was any reason to design projectiles to blow stuff up on the moon until this point.

Though I suppose that if NASA and every space agency and rocket manufacturer in the world were to team up and launch a spacecraft to reach your exact location in under a month, that would be a problem. It would probably be very difficult if not impossible for them to do so, though.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on November 10, 2017, 04:44:50 pm
Iirc ICBMs have a longer range in space than across the earth. It's just rocketry and programming. Also no gravity or inertia to fight in space. That's actually a part of first alien contact plans. Basically we message them a variety of ways with instructions on where to go to indicate peaceful intent and if they deviate, we launch a shitpile of nukes at them.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: nogoodnames on November 10, 2017, 06:12:47 pm
Going to the Moon would keep you safe for a little while; but with most of mankind hellbent on your destruction, it wouldn't take more than a month for someone to crash a probe into your shelter.

Mars would probably be the safest place to wait out the madness. It's too far for anything short of a nuclear pulse rocket or something launched from a mass driver to reach it in less than a month; and even with unlimited resources, it would take at least a couple weeks to set something like that up. Places in the outer or inner solar system may be more remote, but either have less welcoming environments or lack comprehensive and detailed photographs.

Assuming that teleport doesn't allow you to bring along objects (aside from maybe clothes you are wearing) you could use invulnerability for initial setup, then dig a hole to use as a container, write a wish list in the dust and summon some basic shelter supplies like air tanks, heaters, CO2 scrubbers, heavy duty airtight canvas, etc. It'll be a tight budget initially, but with the equivalent of 36k hours of research it should be possible to get a basic Mars shelter up for $1000. Then it's just a matter of playing Mark Watney for a month, expanding your shelter every 3 days as you summon more materials.

The only real threat from Earth during that time would be from one of the Mars rovers trying to murder you with a rock drill; but with communication delay, slow speeds and clumsy scientific tools as their only weapons, you clearly have the advantage there. Or you could use a photo from, say, one of the Viking landers and be well away from the still-functioning rovers. There's also the Mars orbiters, but they probably can't perform the precision reentry required to hit you.

Of course, once everyone regains their sanity there are probably still going to be several kinetic kill vehicles headed your way. So before that happens, either wish for a photo of Earth or, if that doesn't work due to the photo being created by your power and not actually taken by a camera, get a radio and a printer so someone can send one once they stop trying to kill you. This means you'll have to choose teleport as the one power you keep, but that would probably be my choice anyway.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: bloop_bleep on November 10, 2017, 07:21:11 pm
Of course, once everyone regains their sanity there are probably still going to be several kinetic kill vehicles headed your way. So before that happens, either wish for a photo of Earth or, if that doesn't work due to the photo being created by your power and not actually taken by a camera, get a radio and a printer so someone can send one once they stop trying to kill you. This means you'll have to choose teleport as the one power you keep, but that would probably be my choice anyway.
-- Or you could just bring a photo with you.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on November 10, 2017, 09:40:37 pm
Assuming that teleport doesn't allow you to bring along objects (aside from maybe clothes you are wearing)
Teleport lets you bring along anything you can carry.

Making your plan even better.
~~~
You know, when I made this hypothetical, I was expecting "hide in the wilderness", not "hide on Mars" or "hide on seafloor". I suppose that's Bay 12 for me.
~~~
bloop_beep, do you plan on making this a forum game? If you won't, I probably will.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Helgoland on November 10, 2017, 10:04:52 pm
I still think hiding on the opposite side of the sun is much more badass.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on November 19, 2017, 12:15:09 pm
Something or other killed you. You wake up to find Death standing over you. Turns out the whole "game with Death" thing is real, and you can choose what game you want to play with him. Keep in mind he's been doing this for millennia and has likely been challenged to a very wide variety of games. What game do you challenge him to?
~~~
One day, you wake up in the world of Minecraft, with all the attributes of a Minecraft character. What do you do?
~~~
A mysterious box shows up on your doorstep or equivalent. The box always contains various works from up to ten years in the future(games, books(fiction and non-fiction), music, art, magazines, the like). How does this affect your life?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Trekkin on November 19, 2017, 12:30:10 pm
Something or other killed you. You wake up to find Death standing over you. Turns out the whole "game with Death" thing is real, and you can choose what game you want to play with him. Keep in mind he's been doing this for millennia and has likely been challenged to a very wide variety of games. What game do you challenge him to?
~~~
One day, you wake up in the world of Minecraft, with all the attributes of a Minecraft character. What do you do?
~~~
A mysterious box shows up on your doorstep or equivalent. The box always contains various works from up to ten years in the future(games, books(fiction and non-fiction), music, art, magazines, the like). How does this affect your life?

1. The Campaign for North Africa, just because this is probably the only scenario in which anyone has had time to play it.
2. Punch a tree.
3. The usual results of having knowledge of the future from nonfiction books.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: bloop_bleep on November 19, 2017, 07:01:46 pm
Obligatory. (https://xkcd.com/393/)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on November 19, 2017, 07:03:39 pm
D&D, but I'm the GM.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Trekkin on November 19, 2017, 07:20:01 pm
D&D, but I'm the GM.

But D&D is cooperative. How could you win in such a way that Death would also have lost?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on November 19, 2017, 08:40:52 pm
The point isn't to win, because you never "win" D&D, specially as GM. Point is to play for however long I want with skelebro.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: scriver on November 20, 2017, 06:45:10 am
Skelbro: I ROLL A CHAOTIC NEUTRAL KENDER ROGUE
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Helgoland on November 20, 2017, 11:46:30 pm
2x2 tic-tac-toe. Youngest player starts.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: IcyTea31 on November 21, 2017, 03:30:41 am
Something or other killed you. You wake up to find Death standing over you. Turns out the whole "game with Death" thing is real, and you can choose what game you want to play with him. Keep in mind he's been doing this for millennia and has likely been challenged to a very wide variety of games. What game do you challenge him to?
I read this in a webcomic once, but the obvious choice is a wet T-shirt contest. Even if your chest isn't particularly manly or womanly, it's likely to win over a bare ribcage.

Any sort of beauty contest would work, really.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: bloop_bleep on November 21, 2017, 03:35:03 am
Something or other killed you. You wake up to find Death standing over you. Turns out the whole "game with Death" thing is real, and you can choose what game you want to play with him. Keep in mind he's been doing this for millennia and has likely been challenged to a very wide variety of games. What game do you challenge him to?
I read this in a webcomic once, but the obvious choice is a wet T-shirt contest. Even if your chest isn't particularly manly or womanly, it's likely to win over a bare ribcage.

Any sort of beauty contest would work, really.

Nobody saw my link?  :P

Obligatory. (https://xkcd.com/393/)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MetalSlimeHunt on November 21, 2017, 03:36:44 am
I choose parliamentary debate, to be resolved and judged by a random and informed English-speaking human.

If anything goes wrong I spend the entire thing squirreling out with topicality arguments and philosophical critique of Death's person.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on November 21, 2017, 01:19:33 pm
I choose the Game of Life.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: scriver on November 21, 2017, 01:21:05 pm
What about The Game?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on November 27, 2017, 09:09:33 am
You and seven other people around the globe wake up wearing a pointy wizard's cap. There are eight colors of cap, and each one allows the wearer to use a different kind of magic.

Red: Fire Magic
Orange: Illusion Magic
Yellow: Light Magic
Green: Plant Magic
Blue: Electricity Magic
Indigo: Water Magic
Violet: Fungus Magic
Black: Darkness Magic

Wearing multiple hats does allow one to use multiple magics, and furthermore, enhances the power of all the caps one is wearing.

What do? What government do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on November 27, 2017, 04:06:55 pm
Obviously kill the others and take their caps, in theory one will contain some kind of wizardry allowing me to wear 8 pointy hats at once. Until that time I would wear one on my head, one strapped to my chin as a wizardly beard, one on each hand, 2 as shoulder pads, and definitely wear one as a codpiece. The last one I haven't figured out yet because I haven't caught you yet, but I'm coming for you, Last Hat Wizard.

Also, take over the government and rule with a fist made of pointed hats.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: scriver on November 27, 2017, 05:30:46 pm
Ew no, wearing more than one hat is incredibly tacky. What's even the point of being Sorcerer Supreme if you can't be a tasteful wizard?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: AzyWng on November 27, 2017, 05:43:40 pm
Hide your hat; hide your power level.

Find a way to keep the hat on you in a way that you can quickly access it without others knowing you have it. Make your hat into a secret weapon.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on November 27, 2017, 06:52:13 pm
Illusion hat illusion makes the illusion hat invisible. Now nobody knows your power.
Watch as the other hatters run around being obvious, wait until one of them kills all the others, bringing all seven other hats together and doing all the work for you. Illusion them just long enough to snatch the hats off their head and onto yours. Now you're god.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on November 27, 2017, 08:08:32 pm
Gonna go ahead and say lightning hat is best codpiece hat, because then I can pelvic thrust some lightning bolts at my enemies.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: scriver on November 28, 2017, 11:17:01 am
Thunderthrusts and lightning, very very frightening!
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on November 30, 2017, 08:32:07 pm
Ding! You've been teleported to a desert island. In another ding, a rather large chest appears next to you, containing:
368 Miracle Bars, each of which tastes like a different flavor of pie and provides enough nutrition and calories to survive with moderate physical activity for a whole day.
12 Ultimate De-Salt-ifiers, a gadget capable of converting salt water into freshwater if you turn the crank. Each one lasts for a month.
Assorted cups, bowls, plates, and cutlery.
1 book of your choice.
A laptop computer with infinite charge, loaded with one music album of your choice, an archived version of one website of your choice, one video game of your choice(with all expansion packs/DRM), and Microsoft Word.
Inflatable mattress and blankets.
6 changes of clothes.
A mysterious bucket with a black inside bottom. Anything touching the black bottom vanishes.

For one year(or until you escape or are rescued), you will be trapped on this desert island. What do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on November 30, 2017, 08:38:35 pm
Wear the bucket as a helmet.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Reelya on November 30, 2017, 09:03:20 pm
Just shrink the hats so they fit inside each other like those Russian dolls.

If they're conic hats, they'll just stack together, you don't need to shrink them. The only visible issue would be a rainbow section at the bottom, or a stack of rainbow brims if they have a flat part at the bottom.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on December 01, 2017, 07:12:58 pm
Jump into bucket immediately. Take as much stuff with you as possible, especially the laptop.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: IcyTea31 on December 02, 2017, 04:17:37 am
Use the laptop (or any other object with a reflective and/or backlit surface) to signal S.O.S. to a passing ship or plane.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Strife26 on December 03, 2017, 02:10:38 pm
Throw bucket into ocean.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Helgoland on December 03, 2017, 02:57:10 pm
Use the chest as a boat, and submerge the bucket in such a way that the water level difference propels the boat forwards. Go back to civilization, analyze the bucket, become the next Einstein.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on December 03, 2017, 05:53:43 pm
What does the fungus hat do
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on December 05, 2017, 08:16:08 pm
What does the fungus hat do
Gives you power over fungus!
Make magical mushrooms! Control magical mushrooms! Give someone toe infections!
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on December 05, 2017, 09:22:19 pm
What does the fungus hat do
Gives you power over fungus!
Make magical mushrooms! Control magical mushrooms! Give someone toe infections!

Everyone loves/Magical Trevor/Cuz the things that he does/Are ever so clever
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on December 06, 2017, 03:05:42 am
What does the fungus hat do
Gives you power over fungus!
Make magical mushrooms! Control magical mushrooms! Give someone toe infections!

Everyone loves/Magical Trevor/Cuz the things that he does/Are ever so clever
Is that supposed to be sung to the tune of "everybody wants to rule the world"?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on December 06, 2017, 12:44:55 pm
Google Magical Trevor song. Tis wonderful.

Beans lotsa beans...
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on December 11, 2017, 10:20:21 am
New hypothetical. For the next three days, all six-sided dice roll nothing but sixes when thrown. What happens?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on December 11, 2017, 10:31:15 am
The world explodes as everyone starts overshooting constantly.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: andrea on December 11, 2017, 10:32:30 am
Arms races will get an unusual influx of overambitious designs.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Strife26 on December 11, 2017, 02:31:33 pm
New hypothetical. For the next three days, all six-sided dice roll nothing but sixes when thrown. What happens?

Slight bump to sales of Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on December 17, 2017, 06:45:21 pm
New hypothetical. All citrus temporarily grants super strength when eaten. What happens?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on December 17, 2017, 07:26:16 pm
Everyone eats citrus every few minutes, burly world peace.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on December 23, 2017, 11:37:49 am
Buy citrus vitamins. Like so many.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: AzyWng on December 23, 2017, 12:08:42 pm
Eating some more citrus fruits (kind of like the thingie) wouldn't hurt either...

Emergency workers would probably be interested in carrying a few oranges at times. You know, in case they need to break down a door or lift someone heavy so they can rescue someone.

Same goes for construction workers, bouncers, and probably plenty of other professions where physical strength is a requirement.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: exdeath on December 28, 2017, 11:00:44 am
I want to check something and this thread is perfect for it.

If you voted for hillary (or would vote if you were an american citizen) what situation would you prefer?

1-Hillary win 2016 and 2020 election, trump win 2024 and 2028 elections.

2-Hillary and trump lose 2016 election and every presidential election they run for (they also lose primaries, for the sake of giving their parties a chance to win).

Vote at the poll.
http://www.strawpoll.me/14713330
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on December 28, 2017, 02:15:30 pm
...

I'm not sure if that's in the spirit of this thread. Ah well.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on December 29, 2017, 04:21:10 pm
...

I'm not sure if that's in the spirit of this thread. Ah well.

This. But I will vote upon the pyre of your poll.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: AzyWng on January 01, 2018, 06:23:13 pm
...

I'm not sure if that's in the spirit of this thread. Ah well.

This. But I will vote upon the pyre of your poll.

And I shall enter the pyre of your poll that I might burn away in the flames and be in this Trump-dominated world no longer.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on January 03, 2018, 10:52:53 am
New hypothetical. You somehow now own a library containing at least one copy of one book ever written(and one copy of every book that will be written for the next ten years). What do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Criptfeind on January 03, 2018, 10:55:58 am
Immediately cause a universe ending paradox.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: scriver on January 03, 2018, 11:15:21 am
Check for the next Song of Ice and Fire book. Every day.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Whisperling on January 03, 2018, 12:48:09 pm
Sell the historic manuscripts to museums and collectors for as much money as possible. Retire, proceed to enjoy the vast amount of reading material.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on January 03, 2018, 12:58:05 pm
Sell the historic manuscripts to museums and collectors for as much money as possible. Retire, proceed to enjoy the vast amount of reading material.
Sell the historic manuscripts to collectors for as much money as possible in order to fund a scientific/industrial complex based mostly on plagiarizing future textbooks. 
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on January 03, 2018, 03:42:14 pm
Sell the whole thing for All The Money.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: scriver on January 03, 2018, 06:33:43 pm
You don't sell the whole thing. You sell the books, because because the place contains every book they're still going to be there tomorrow so you can sell them again.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MrRoboto75 on January 03, 2018, 07:06:23 pm
You don't sell the whole thing. You sell the books, because because the place contains every book they're still going to be there tomorrow so you can sell them again.

So you're saying I could burn it to boil water and generate infinite electricity?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on January 03, 2018, 08:53:24 pm
You don't sell the whole thing. You sell the books, because because the place contains every book they're still going to be there tomorrow so you can sell them again.

So you're saying I could burn it to boil water and generate infinite electricity?
For some reason I'm reminded of this
https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/a_bunch_of_rocks.png
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on January 04, 2018, 08:57:24 am
New hypothetical. You somehow now own a library containing at least one copy of one book ever written(and one copy of every book that will be written for the next ten years). What do?
Well you'd probably want to get a priceless historical book from the library of Alexandria or Bagdhad or something. Either that or top sekrit documents from a government detailing how the moon landing was faked because the moon isn't real
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: scriver on January 05, 2018, 04:52:50 am
Turns out both the Alexandrian and Bagdad libraries only held ancient fanfiction and furry porn. Sorry.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on January 06, 2018, 02:53:17 pm
Turns out both the Alexandrian and Bagdad libraries only held ancient fanfiction and furry porn. Sorry.
Quote
Re called the Two Contendors before Him. He passed Divine Jugdment upon Them for Their wrong-doings. He demanded that They cease their quarreling. Seth appeared to agree. He invited Horus to stay with Him in His palace.

One evening, as the two lay together resting, Seth inserted his penis between the thighs of Horus. Horus, however, unknown to the Dark Lord of Storm, had caught Seth's semen in His hand. With the help of His mother, Isis, He placed His own semen upon lettuce growing in a garden; lettuce that Seth was to eat.

Seth spake unto Horus, "Come, let us go, that I may contend with you in the Court." Within the Court, Seth declared, "Let the office of Ruler be given to Me, for as regards Horus who stands here, I have done a man's deed to Him."

Horus laughed and said, "What Seth has said is false. Let the semen of Seth be called, and let us see from where it will answer."

And so Thoth, the Self Created, called upon the semen of Seth. The answer came from a far-away marsh, where Isis had long since deposited it.

Horus said, "Let mind be called, and let us see from where it will answer."

Then Thoth laid His hand on the arm of Seth and said, "Come out, semen of Horus!" And it spake unto Him, "Where shall I come out?" Thoth said to it, "Come out of His ear." It replied to Him, "Should I come out of His ear, I who am Divine Seed?" Then it came out as a Golden Sun Disk upon the head of Seth. Seth became very angry, and He stretched forth His hand to seize the Golden Disk.
deepest lore (http://www.theologywebsite.com/etext/egypt/horus.shtml)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on January 31, 2018, 09:25:09 am
This thread will never die if I have anything to say about it.
~~~
You open your closet one day to find it stuffed full of living cats(of various species). What do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on January 31, 2018, 09:46:49 am
This thread will never die if I have anything to say about it.
~~~
You open your closet one day to find it stuffed full of living cats(of various species). What do?
CLOSE IT YOU FOOL BEFORE THE CATSPLOS-
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TamerVirus on January 31, 2018, 10:09:07 am
cats(of various species).
I'd probably get mauled to death by a cougar.

The good old Red Dead Redemption way of death
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on January 31, 2018, 07:11:46 pm
Introduce large hawks to the closet, one of the common cats' only natural predators.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on January 31, 2018, 09:32:15 pm
Um. Run out of the house and call animal control.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on February 02, 2018, 08:16:09 pm
Um. Run out of the house and call animal control.
Animal control, while rather confused, manage to get all the cats out of your closet. The portal in your closet, leading to the Plane of Cats, is another story.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on February 02, 2018, 08:33:51 pm
Um. Run out of the house and call animal control.
Animal control, while rather confused, manage to get all the cats out of your closet. The portal in your closet, leading to the Plane of Cats, is another story.

Consult Papa Pussycat, whose sole vocation is surprisingly limited to expert-level general shamanistic knowledge of portals to feline planes of existence.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on February 02, 2018, 11:26:47 pm
Become rich and famous due to discovering interdimensional portals.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on February 04, 2018, 11:38:52 am
Become rich and famous due to discovering interdimensional portals.

You discover interdimensional portals and build a device that can create two of them at will. What do you do with it?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on February 04, 2018, 01:15:51 pm
Make sure the creation of the portals doesn't have any byproducts, first of all. Strangelets would be bad.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on February 04, 2018, 05:14:49 pm
Make one portal to the universe of infinite matter and another portal to the universe of infinite antimatter. Harness enormous amount of energy to power the whole world. Primarily clean transportation and clean water.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on February 05, 2018, 02:33:19 pm
Make one portal to the universe of infinite matter and another portal to the universe of infinite antimatter. Harness enormous amount of energy to power the whole world. Primarily clean transportation and clean water.

HAVE YOU EVEN PLAYED DOOM
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on February 05, 2018, 04:41:22 pm
Not fuckin hell, matter and antimatter.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MrRoboto75 on February 05, 2018, 05:04:01 pm
Make one portal to the universe of infinite matter and another portal to the universe of infinite antimatter. Harness enormous amount of energy to power the whole world. Primarily clean transportation and clean water.

HAVE YOU EVEN PLAYED DOOM

I paid as much attention as doomguy did
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on February 05, 2018, 09:28:52 pm
Make one portal to the universe of infinite matter and another portal to the universe of infinite antimatter. Harness enormous amount of energy to power the whole world. Primarily clean transportation and clean water.

HAVE YOU EVEN PLAYED DOOM

I paid as much attention as doomguy did

This is as fair a statement as I have ever seen.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on February 07, 2018, 06:28:19 pm
You open the portal to the universe of infinite antimatter.

... why is the antimatter made of cats?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TamerVirus on February 07, 2018, 06:38:52 pm
Why not?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on February 07, 2018, 06:54:42 pm
If you can't prove to me right here in this thread that all antimatter is not actually made of cats, perhaps some form of anticat, I'm going to accept that as fact.

We probably just can't properly examine it well enough to understand it's feline nature.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on February 07, 2018, 07:28:50 pm
Catantimatter. New favorite word.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on February 07, 2018, 08:45:03 pm
You open the portal to the universe of infinite antimatter.

... why is the antimatter made of cats?
It doesn't really matter what the antimatter is shaped like when you're annihilating it for energy anyway.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on February 07, 2018, 08:47:52 pm
Not fuckin hell, matter and antimatter.
Yeah, it's not like UAC and Black Mesa were delliberatedly trying to trigger transdimensional invasions either.

Btw I just realized that Half Life is almost a step by step retelling of Doom and Doom 2.  Down to the final bosses  (Gornach = Spider Mastermind, Nihilant = Oremornhoj).   Not that I complain, it's a beautiful homage, if I may say.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dorsidwarf on February 08, 2018, 08:57:40 pm
I mean the UAC totally knew they were sticking their hand in the beartrap of Hell, they just hoped that they'd propped the beartrap open securely enough
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on February 08, 2018, 11:53:25 pm
And a certain someone is totally responsible for intentionally triggering the black mesa incident.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on February 09, 2018, 03:31:22 pm
You open the portal to the universe of infinite antimatter.

... why is the antimatter made of cats?
It doesn't really matter what the antimatter is shaped like when you're annihilating it for energy anyway.

It matters to the anticats, made of catantimatter in the nega-cativerse.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on February 10, 2018, 09:46:02 am
This is the best conversation.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on February 12, 2018, 09:05:40 pm
You wake up with an extreme talent you never had before. What would you like this talent to be?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on February 13, 2018, 08:00:39 pm
Extreme Kazoo
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TamerVirus on February 13, 2018, 08:03:16 pm
EXTREME POTATO COUNTING
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: NRDL on February 13, 2018, 08:25:35 pm
Extreme organisation skills.

Seriously. It would be applicable to literally ever facet of my life, any endeavour I'd like to accomplish I'd be able to do so in the most efficient and expedient manner possible. Life would actually be genuinely straightforward if I got my shit together.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: AzyWng on February 13, 2018, 10:22:50 pm
Extreme time management will probably cause a number of problems, but having it would probably help me the most both immediately and in the future.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: bloop_bleep on February 13, 2018, 11:06:25 pm
Does EXTREME MATH SKILLZ count, given that I already have at least somewhat of a talent in it?

Going down in history for solving some significant mathematical problem has been a lifelong dream of mine.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on February 14, 2018, 03:51:51 pm
No wait

Extreme crab juggling.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: scriver on February 15, 2018, 12:33:07 am
X-treme Everyday Chitchatting!
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on February 16, 2018, 04:04:33 pm
NEW HYPOTHETICAL.

You wake up with the power to juggle any object, regardless of size or weight. You must have 3 identical objects in order for your power to work. You are able to accomplish any juggling trick you are aware of, all of which is providing that physical space allows.

How do you utilize this power.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on February 16, 2018, 06:56:36 pm
How identical do the objects have to be?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on February 16, 2018, 06:58:10 pm
Not literally identical. If you are juggling basketballs they don't need to be the same color.

You can juggle a basketball and a baseball at the same time.

You cannot juggle a baseball glove and a baseball.

Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on February 16, 2018, 07:21:43 pm
At least three, or more than three?

If more than three is acceptable, I can juggle bullets flying at me.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: AzyWng on February 16, 2018, 08:04:56 pm
Juggle chainsaws, duh!

Small ones, of course, but still. Could make a good bit of money as part of a show.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TamerVirus on February 16, 2018, 08:08:15 pm
I'll go to Vegas and get filthy stinking rich as the cat juggler extraordinaire
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on February 16, 2018, 08:54:08 pm
Are earth, mars, and venus close enough in composition to juggle
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on February 16, 2018, 09:00:06 pm
Alternatively, juggle cars. Iron Man did it, why can't I?
~~~
New hypothetical. You find a briefcase on your bed one morning. In it, you find five vials, a million euros, a strange blob of putty, and a note.

The note informs you that you've been chosen to save humanity from an alien invasion. In three years, give or take six months, an alien invasion will begin. The note also elaborates on the nature of the invasion, and it isn't good.

Earth is going to be invaded by a coalition of three alien species, the Argar, Neshaneki, and Sk'karitz, doing their best to destroy humanity in order to claim Earth's resources. The Argar are militant monstrous humanoid aliens, the grunts of the coalition. They never stop growing until they die of their own weight. The largest of them can survive multiple tank shells to the torso before collapsing. The Sk'karitz are the spiderlike scientists and engineers of the coalition, the ones who have invented FTL travel and constructed the coalition's equipment and vessels. When they fight, they typically utilize power armor and drones. The purple catlike Neshaneki are the coalition's leaders and the fewest in number. Only a few dozen Neshaneki are on the mothership aiming to invade Earth, but they make up for it with their psionic powers. Neshaneki have the ability to induce absolute loyalty in anyone they touch, once per 79 hours and 38 minutes, along with brutally strong telekinesis and memory manipulation. The Neshaneki are immune to each others' powers. The writer of the note suspects that the Neshaneki will attempt to subvert Earth's governments while the other parts of the coalition invade.

The note emphasizes that you shouldn't give up hope. While the coalition's mothership is most likely impossible to destroy, the note emphasizes that the coalition is cautious. If you destroy enough of their invasion force, especially the infiltrating Neshaneki, the mothership will retreat. The coalition's tech base is much higher than Earth's, but isn't an insurmountable advantage. In addition, the note describes the vials. The four yellow vials contain an infusion of Sk'karitz brain mixed with various chemicals and bacteria. If injected into the spine, it should increase the technological giftedness of whoever it is injected into to extreme levels. The single purple vial contains an infusion of Neshaneki brain mixed with various chemicals and bacteria. If injected into the spine, it should grant whoever it is injected into the psionic powers of a Neshaneki, starting weak but growing to full strength in a month. The note notes that the vials may possess the side effect of gradually altering the physiology and mentality of the recipient to be more like the physiology and mentality of the donor species, though the writer isn't sure.

The note informs you that it shouldn't be impossible to replicate the vials, but they will require brain matter from the donor species in order to fabricate.

The note informs you that if you'd like to pass the responsibility of uniting and rallying humanity to another, you must simply eat the putty, and you will wake up a day later hungover and lacking your memories of the briefcase and its contents. It supposedly tastes like cinnamon fish brownie pie.

The note is signed, "Mr. E."
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on February 16, 2018, 09:11:55 pm
Inform the police that I found a weird briefcase full of European money. Don't touch any of the stuff in there, including the note.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on February 16, 2018, 09:17:53 pm
Blow up the Earth.

Fuck you, aliens.


Alternatively, drink one of each vial and take over the planet, unifying it into a prepared military force to resist the incoming invasion. Assuming that the "should" isn't code for "just kidding you are dead now", then......

Step 1: Use loyalty powers to create small, ineffective band of minions. Use money to finance this endeavor. Tell them to attempt to kill the President, but stop them subtly but publicly with your crazy-go-nuts telekinesis. Kill em' all so they can't talk.

Step 2: When the President shakes your hand for the media, loyalty-snare him.

Step 3: Influence President to assign you as some manner of important foreign dignitary. For one year, continue to attend meetings of world leaders and loyalty-shake their hands, bringing them and as many high-ranking decision-makers into your fold. We are able to (directly) control 110 people before three years are up.

Step 4: At this point, you have enough power and influence to form some kind of anti-alien coalition. Using your SCIENCE POWERS reverse-engineer the remaining science vials. Give select individuals the SCIENCE POWERS and instruct them to focus on defensive military might.

Step 5: Resist aliens with newfound unity and technology.

Step 6: Conquer Galaxy for humanity.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on February 16, 2018, 09:44:22 pm
But you misread. There is no drinking.  You hve to give yourself an intrathecal injection.

Its probably a better idea to inject someone else with the sciserum and have him reverse engineer everything.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Maximum Spin on February 16, 2018, 10:47:37 pm
Reverse-engineer the formula, obtain human brains, produce formula using human brains, inject aliens.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on February 16, 2018, 11:03:20 pm
Reverse-engineer the formula, obtain human brains, produce formula using human brains, inject aliens.
But we need only the best brains.  Brains like genius. Believe mE
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TamerVirus on February 16, 2018, 11:05:30 pm
Go to Vegas with my million euro.
Put chunks of putty in the food of random people at the buffet
kill self day before invasion
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on February 17, 2018, 03:47:47 pm
Go to Vegas with my million euro.
Put chunks of putty in the food of random people at the buffet
kill self day before invasion

+1
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on February 17, 2018, 04:44:04 pm
Wait, why do they think they need to destroy humankind in order to get at Earth's resources? Inject yourself with the psionic fun times and infect the coalition with human capitalism. Propose intergalactic trade for maximum profit and peaceful solution to everything. Sell them memory loss putty in order to help them forget terrible nights out with the Neshaneki
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on February 20, 2018, 09:19:57 pm
An invincible forcefield that's intangible except to humans forms, connecting the north and south pole. It promptly starts rotating around the globe, slowly. What happens?
~~~
A suit of empty alien power armor crash-lands in your bedroom. Its neural interface promptly bonds with you. What happens?
~~~
All knives cut through matter as if it were butter. How does this change society and warfare?
~~~
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: AzyWng on February 21, 2018, 03:44:02 pm
How solid would the butter in the "cut through like butter" be? If it were something like melted butter...

Things could get quite messy.

If it cut through matter like solid butter, things shouldn't be quite so bad.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on February 23, 2018, 02:26:25 pm
1- Nobody cares except for billionaires who want to launch cars into space.

2- World domination, obviously.

3- If knives were made out of butter they wouldn't be able to cut things very well now would they how would we eat steaks hmm?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: bloop_bleep on February 23, 2018, 03:08:25 pm
3- If knives were made out of butter they wouldn't be able to cut things very well now would they how would we eat steaks hmm?
Stuff it all in at once, like a MAN.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on February 27, 2018, 09:52:19 pm
New gosh-darn hypothetical.

You open your front door this morning to see nothing but empty blackness. Your home building has been suspended in a void. Everyone living in your home building has been replaced by a Bay 12 member. Air doesn't seem to be a problem, but what about everything else?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: bloop_bleep on February 27, 2018, 09:55:43 pm
Launch the most fucking epic RPG tabletop game ever.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TamerVirus on February 27, 2018, 11:09:13 pm
Cannibalism.
It will end in cannibalism
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on March 05, 2018, 02:48:56 pm
Assign self position of overseer.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on March 12, 2018, 03:17:10 pm
If you could choose one item from the Bizarre Magical Items thread (http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=138652.0) to have in your possession, what would it be?

Bonus: You may choose to have three items instead, but if you do, three items will be randomly selected from the thread and dumped in the White House, your bedroom, and the Moon.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Whisperling on March 12, 2018, 04:08:55 pm
Escalator: This magical amulet makes the user escalate any situation.
Quick Buck: A dollar that enhances its owner's salesmanship ability to absurd levels. Those who have been sold to will realize their idiocy after a few hours, and inevitably sue(or take things to an even worse level).
Intrest:
This is a simple silver coin which creates an exact copy of itself once every second, which will then start making it's own copies. If any of the coins are melted down or otherwise stop being coins, they lose the magical effect and become inert silver. Side effects of this item may include making silver valueless.


Nothing could possibly go wrong.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on March 12, 2018, 05:01:14 pm
Welp.

Exponential growth is not going to end well. Sure, you can sell the Intrest coins with the Quick Buck. But you've basically doomed the world unless one of the random items is the Wand of Anti-Self-Replication.

*rolls*

The White House gets a glass of milk that has +1 to attack.

Trump: "Just this morning, I found a glass of milk in my bedroom!"

*rolls*

You get a Wing of Flight. Not Wings, Wing.

You: "Maybe I can sell it?"

*rolls*

A fork appears on the Moon. It's immune to being imploded.

The U.N: "Who put a fork up there! How did we not notice!"

I guess the world is doomed to suffocate under silver, then.

Everyone: "The coins! The coins!"

Economist: "So much for the value of silver."

Trump: "Who cares about the value of silver, we're all going to be crushed under a pile of coins! Should've put more money into NASA!"
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on March 12, 2018, 09:10:43 pm
Reminder that though Interest grows quickly, it's not unstoppable, because the coin will stop replicating itself if it is, say, crushed under a massive amount of silver coins.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: NAV on March 14, 2018, 01:43:20 pm
All humans will die long before coins stop being replicated.

The best answer is to launch lots of nukes at the center of the coinpocalypse ASAP. Maybe Trump is actually the best president to deal with the Silvergularity?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Rockeater on March 14, 2018, 01:49:01 pm
PTW
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: bloop_bleep on March 14, 2018, 03:16:46 pm
Even nukes won't be able to stop it. Assuming that the coins are spread out evenly over the Earth so that no coins overlap, it would take just under a minute for the coins to cover the entire surface of the Earth.

Though that's probably a pretty bad assumption to make, and we're not even accounting for the coins dropping into the ocean...

I sense that I'm about to go on a calculating spree to find out just how long it takes for the world to end in this scenario.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: NAV on March 14, 2018, 05:24:33 pm
Eh, it starts with one coin in one place. The moment the silver engulfs an area the size of a small town trigger happy trump will launch the nukes and glass the area. Problem solved. Unless some coins at the outskirts are blasted away but not destroyed in which case problem massively accelerated.

Just in case anyone is wondering I don't support trump I'm a canadian socialist.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Rockeater on March 15, 2018, 12:01:09 am
What the area a nuke can effectevly destroy?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: IcyTea31 on March 15, 2018, 04:49:50 am
What the area a nuke can effectevly destroy?
Depends on the weapon. Most nuclear weapons are designed to destroy medium-large cities, but the biggest, theoretical ones could destroy entire small nations.

I think the biggest problem with nuking the coins, however, is that it's not unlikely for even one coin to survive the heat and pressure. Or worse, be thrown a long distance away to spread the silvery death to other places. If that happens, you've just killed countless innocents for no gain.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: NRDL on March 19, 2018, 06:26:53 am
New hypothetical, an oldie but goodie. You find a clone of yourself standing in front of you, all your memories, essentially you.

Do you fight, or $#%@?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on March 19, 2018, 06:33:12 am
like really why would I fight
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Whisperling on March 19, 2018, 08:19:17 am
Agree not to do the whole "kill the other and take their place" thing, work together instead. There are now two of me to throw at any given problem.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Rockeater on March 19, 2018, 08:33:38 am
Probably nither.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Grim Portent on March 19, 2018, 08:34:17 am
Probably sit down together and talk about the interesting ramifications of there being two of us and how we'll diverge from that point onwards. Probably try to figure out a way to accomodate the clone in my life. Might make property division awkward until we get things properly arranged, and I'd need to make a second hobby space for it somewhere.

Wouldn't fight because really what would be the point, wouldn't bang because I don't possess the traits I find sexually attractive.

Getting it registered as it's own legal entity might be difficult but would be important.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on March 19, 2018, 09:32:49 am
Have a long, long talk. Both of us think we're the original. Things would probably get awkward within my family. Having both of us attend my college classes would be...

Well, it would be weird. I'd need another bed.

Once I get it all worked out, though, best friends forever.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on March 19, 2018, 12:26:22 pm
Whatever I decide to do DIRECTLY after the cloning, my clone will do the same because we're both almost exactly the same person at that moment and we're both in the same situation. Therefore I pretty much have the prisoner's dilemma where I know that whatever I decide to do in advance, we'll both do. So the only reasonable option is mutual gain.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on March 19, 2018, 01:24:25 pm
Probably sit down together and talk about the interesting ramifications of there being two of us and how we'll diverge from that point onwards.
yeah but two people in a room with identical ideas who sit around confirming each other's opinions and beliefs is basically a circle jerk anyway, so why not go all out?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TamerVirus on March 19, 2018, 01:40:17 pm
(http://i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/694/181/fe4.jpg)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: AzyWng on March 19, 2018, 05:17:57 pm
Agree not to do the whole "kill the other and take their place" thing, work together instead. There are now two of me to throw at any given problem.

I've seen this quandary enough times to decide that killing the other is just a bad move, period.

This means both of us would agree on this point (and probably every other, as stated earlier).

So yeah, this. I'd do this.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on March 19, 2018, 05:44:42 pm
Apparently the clone knows it's a clone, so if I was a clone I'd probably just move somewhere else and have a go at life.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on March 21, 2018, 01:36:32 pm
Hey now I only have to work part time. We just split our life in half for maximum laziness time.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on March 21, 2018, 02:05:34 pm
Hey now I only have to work part time. We just split our life in half for maximum laziness time.
You still need to feed both yourselves. You might get away with sharing a room and bed because you're literally the same and thus have no need for privacy, but some costs will certainly go up.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on April 06, 2018, 03:55:19 pm
If you could choose to have a billion dollars added to an unhackable bank account under your name and control, but be forever unable to gain more money in any way, or receive a check for a thousand dollars at the end of every month, which would you choose? Or will you forfeit both options and choose the mystery option?

~~~
You've been given governmental command over every nation on Earth, minus seven people who are coming to kill you. The people each possess a different supernatural power. The seven powers they possess are infinite inertia(the ability to completely ignore any amount of kinetic energy), rebellion(the ability to create speeches that cause all those who hear them, minus you, to rebel against government control if they listen for long enough), competence(the ability to instantly become a master at any humanly possible skill), possession(the ability to possess anyone and take complete control over them, and access their memories), reload(the ability to send their mind into their past self, but only up to ten times and up to twenty five hours in the past), replication(the ability to create a clone of their self once per hour, with the clone having all the capabilities of the original minus the ability to make clones), and photomancy(the ability to pull physical objects out of printed photographs, but only once per object). If you manage to kill or permanently incapacitate all seven, you may choose to revert the state of the world to before the challenge begins, and gain two of the powers listed. If you manage to survive for three months, you may choose to revert the state of the world to before the challenge begins.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on April 06, 2018, 04:03:59 pm
The thousand. I don't need massive amounts of money to be happy, in fact that would probably be counterproductive. The only reason you'd want that much money is because it makes it easier to earn more money, which is verboten.
And not taking the mystery option, you might have filled it with bees for all I know.

Edit:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)



Abduct the seven's families and find a nice bunker somewhere. Abdicate military control to someone more competent than me. With the following orders.
ID possession. If she shows up anywhere near somebody with real power, engage with extreme prejudice and retire everyone involved.
If Rebellion so much as shows his face in public anywhere, drone strike him with no regard for collateral.
I'll hole up in my bunker with my hostages as well as a crack team of commandos. The stated plan to EVERYONE BUT ME is that the seven go into the bunker and are ambushed by the commandos. The real plan is that the seven inevitably slaughter all of my protectors. I'm in a room with only one entrance, empty except for me and my hostages. I wait beside the door in and stab anyone who enters in the neck with a knife.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on April 06, 2018, 04:05:32 pm
I went with the mystery option, given that one billion dollars would probably run out faster than one would think, and one thousand dollars every month is frankly small potatoes from my point of view.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on April 06, 2018, 04:20:19 pm
$1000 a month may not be a huge impact, but it's better than nothing. The mystery option maybe well be much, much, much worse than nothing. The thousand is the only option with no capacity to screw you over.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: NRDL on April 06, 2018, 07:05:16 pm
Thousand seems pretty decent, but it would take a good bit of day to day planning. Is there no way to acquire more money? Like, I'm guessing the prompt would require you to not work or earn your own income from a job, but could you invest the part of the $1000?

Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on April 06, 2018, 07:13:25 pm
I read the thousand as "+1000 no strings attached"  ie you can still earn money in other ways.   I went with the mistery option because I'm not as risk averse as some wusses here  Egan is, and 1000 bucks is poo anyway. (And a hypothethical anyway :p ).  And it aint bad at all, imo  ;)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on April 06, 2018, 10:31:31 pm
Thousand seems pretty decent, but it would take a good bit of day to day planning. Is there no way to acquire more money? Like, I'm guessing the prompt would require you to not work or earn your own income from a job, but could you invest the part of the $1000?
The thousand comes with no strings attached. The billion comes with the string you see. The mystery option comes with the mystery strings.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on April 06, 2018, 10:34:02 pm
"No strings" is intrinsically more desirable than "mystery strings", because I have absolutely no idea if the wish giver is going to be a dick.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: NRDL on April 06, 2018, 11:23:12 pm
Fuck yeah I'll take the extra $1000. As it stands, I could put say half of it in a bank account and use the other half to supplement daily expenses.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on April 07, 2018, 03:57:40 am
The trick with the mystery option is that

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on April 07, 2018, 04:01:37 pm
I'll go ahead and do my own hypotheticals.

Assuming I didn't know what the mystery option is, I'd take the billion. If it's possible to live on fifty thousand dollars a year, my fortune would last me twenty thousand years if I lived off that much per year.  Or I can live on a hundred thousand dollars per year for ten thousand years. Two hundred thousand dollars per year for five thousand years. Four hundred thousand dollars per year for two thousand five hundred years. It goes on and on. Eight hundred thousand dollars a year for one thousand two hundred and fifty years. 1.6 million dollars a year for six hundred and twenty five years. 3.2 million per year for three hundred twelve and a half years. 6.4 million per year for one hundred six and a fourth years. I could live in luxury for that. Assuming inflation doesn't become too much of an issue or we don't develop super anti-aging tech, I'll be fine.

With regards to the mystery option,

Spoiler: Mystery! (click to show/hide)

With regards to hunting down the seven:

There's no guarantee the seven will value the lives of their families over ending my own life.

Possession and Rebellion are very dangerous for subverting the population, but Photomancy's dangerous in his own way if he manages to get ahold of original photographs of nuclear weapons. Competence can definitely acquire the skills necessary to set one off.

I'd make public all information I had on the seven, and offer massive rewards to those who supply info about their location. Tactical drone strikes do seem like a good idea, they're immune to basically anything the seven can do aside from escaping. As soon as I have a location, missile the heck out of them, prioritizing...

Actually, that's a good hypothetical.
~~~
With regards to the seven enemies described in my earlier hypothetical, how would you rank them on the danger scale?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on April 07, 2018, 11:14:07 pm
Possession is stronger than any of the others because she can just take over any of the others and use their powers, in addition to her own. :P

There's no guarantee the seven will value the lives of their families over ending my own life.
There's no guarantee of anything, but is seems statistically very likely that if the seven are chosen randomly from the population that at least one and probably a lot more of them have valuable loved ones. And if even just one of them does, they'll use that special power of theirs to the fullest to prevent the others from nuking me.
In this light, nuclear weapons aren't actually that big of a threat. Even if they get a picture of an IBCM, they won't have the resources to actually fire it, so it has to be something that they summon at the target location, or delivered by truck or something. And if they somehow succeed in exploding a city or something without vaporizing themselves in the process, the population of earth is now much more motivated to hunt them down than I could ever manage myself.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on April 14, 2018, 07:21:40 pm
If you knew the apocalypse(via plague) was coming in five years, and could choose seven cities to put under temporal stasis for ten years, which cities would you choose?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Rockeater on April 14, 2018, 11:48:27 pm
Probably most populated ones, maybe replace the seventh with the one I am at.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on April 15, 2018, 09:57:26 am
Would the stasis spare us?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on April 16, 2018, 06:59:11 pm
Would the stasis spare us?

This. Also, mine.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Grim Portent on April 16, 2018, 07:27:28 pm
I'm not sure putting the biggest cities in stasis is necessarily a good idea. That's ten years the rest of the world is missing them, which will just make the disaster worse if it's possible for anyone outside the cities to survive the apocalypse plague, and then you have to deal with the logistics of supplying the cities post stasis when the surrounding infrastructure is ruined. In post apocalypse scenarios you don't want to overburden yourself with too many people before you get back off the ground.

Ideal choices would be places with some farms that fall within the notional city limits, a smallish population with a broad range of technical skills, a good set of schools, robust well engineered surrounding roads that can last with minimal maintenance, mild weather year round, good stockpiles of complex medical supplies, refineries for various resources and they should ideally all be within a reasonable distance from each other to coordinate rebuilding the world together without needing to rely on a likely failed communication network. Clean water sources that will still be available post apocalypse and stasis of course. Bunch of other stuff to think about for after the apocalypse.

Probably wind up picking a few medium sized cities in the region of France/Italy/Spain as a first instinct. The weather's not too extreme to become a major problem unlike a city in Canada or Saudi Arabia for example, decent natural resources, they're close enough that travel/cooperation isn't a major hurdle, populace has a decent basic education level, no particularly problematic diseases or vermin that I can think of.

Cities with huge food/water stockpiles would be a good choice, but I'm not sure if it would outweigh other considerations by itself.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on April 27, 2018, 07:44:50 pm
If you had a Death Note, would you use it, and if so, who would you use it on?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: NRDL on April 27, 2018, 08:33:20 pm
So, having watched the anime, my first response would be just not use it. If I can't destroy it, I'll probably try and bury it somewhere where no one else can get their hands on it.

I suppose the only thing that would prompt me to use it is if I were in a protracted situation where my life is under threat, like say from a hypothetical belligerent criminal, a stalker, or say a known terrorist was holding family or loved ones hostage.

As to HOW I would use it, obviously in a less noticeable manner than Light Yagami. No heart attacks out of nowhere, gotta craft really elaborate yet believable scenarios. Getting gunned down by police, killing themselves after making them act in a suicidal manner in public, stuff like that. Absolutely no one can suspect supernatural interference.

From there, it would probably be a slippery slope for me as I use the Death Note to kill people whom I find affect my life in a negative manner.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on April 27, 2018, 08:37:12 pm
Write down the names of every known god, of course. Just in case any are real.
*tips fedora, moonwalks out of thread*
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on May 01, 2018, 10:17:26 pm
What personality, likes and dislikes, and beliefs would you want your hypothetical ideal best friend to have?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on May 01, 2018, 10:29:42 pm
Probably whatever my real best friend is like. They're my best friend for a reason, right? ;P
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on May 02, 2018, 12:43:54 pm
A football-playing king in space.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on June 03, 2018, 11:44:17 pm
It's time to pick some talents! Assume they're cumulative.

Of drawing, music, and writing, which would you rather have a talent in?

Of computer programming, tax law, and interior design, which would you rather have a talent in?

Of cooking, sewing, and woodwork, which would you rather have a talent in?

Of video gaming, board gaming, and card gaming, which would you rather have a talent in?

Of tennis, football, and water polo, which would you rather have a talent in?

Was there a talent listed that you really wanted to pick but couldn't because it was in the same trio as something else you wanted to pick more? If so, which ones? Would you be willing to forfeit two other talents to take that one?

Would you be willing to sacrifice three or five of your new talents for a mystery option?

Spoiler: If So: (click to show/hide)
~~~
If you could choose one fictional world to visit for a day, what would it be? Keep in mind you can choose your date and time of entry, and you gain the ability to speak, read, and write the most common native language for the day.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on June 04, 2018, 01:57:56 pm
I'll the pick the ones I have! I'm good at drawing, programming, cooking, video games, and tennis!

Also, no, I would not sacrifice anywhere between 60% and 100% of everything I know for a chance at one thing I might like.

Spoiler: If so: (click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on June 09, 2018, 06:33:54 pm
300 Spartans vs. the Persian army. Who wins.

The Spartans are from Halo.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on June 09, 2018, 07:04:37 pm
Spartans drop from space in their sweet drop pods. Start shooting at the persians.  Then Tyranids come and eat everything.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on June 11, 2018, 12:57:52 pm
Nobody wins, because then they couldn't milk a sequel.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MrRoboto75 on June 11, 2018, 01:21:45 pm
Nobody wins, because then they couldn't milk a sequel.

Just reboot it a few years later
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Rockeater on June 11, 2018, 01:30:37 pm
Nobody wins, because then they couldn't milk a sequel.

Just reboot it a few years later
The reboot need to be grrity and realistic
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Folly on July 02, 2018, 11:52:48 pm
You are a superhero.

A feud between supervillains has resulted in your arch-nemesis being suspended in a cage that is slowly being lowered into a vat of molten lava. On the opposite side of town, a bus full of schoolchildren is slowly rolling down a hill with a deadly cliffside at the bottom. You are midway between the two situations, and only have time to save one of them.

Obviously you're going to save the kids. But, being the hero you are, you do the noble thing and call the supervillain to inform him of the situation and let him know he's going to die. The supervillain then tells you that you should save him, and he will use his smart-phone to hack into the bus's onboard computer system and save the children. Nobody has to die.

Now, several things are more than a little bit suspicious about this proposal. Do busses even have onboard computers with wireless access and the capacity to take control of the vehicle? You don't think they do...and even if they do, could a smart-phone actually be used to perform such an outlandish hack in a matter of minutes? On the other hand, this supervillain is the mad genius type, and you've seen him pull off exactly this kind of shit before. On the other other hand, this guy is also pure evil, and he would definitely lie about something like this to save his own skin. And even if he can save the children, he might let them die just for teh lulz. On the other other other hand, your superhero code says that if there is even a slim chance to save everybody, you have to go for it. On the other other other other hand, that same code has gotten a ton of other superheroes killed, and dead heroes can't save anybody.

Anyway, you have to choose, save the kids or try to save everybody? What do you do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on July 03, 2018, 01:16:03 am
Do the classic superhero thing and Take The Third Option.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on July 03, 2018, 01:22:16 am
Hmmm
How about "try saving the villain, but if he's lying become DR-Man"?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Reelya on July 03, 2018, 02:58:05 am
It's time to pick some talents! Assume they're cumulative.

Myself I'd pick ones I lack, since they impress me more.

drawing, music, and writing => drawing

computer programming, tax law, and interior design => interior design

cooking, sewing, and woodwork => woodwork

video gaming, board gaming, and card gaming => card gaming

tennis, football, and water polo => tennis

So in this hypothetical other life I'm a cabinet maker, artist and decorator who plays tennis on Saturdays and has a poker night one night per week. Livin' la vida loca.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 03, 2018, 12:09:12 pm
Save the kids. For sure. Things are only going to get nasty if we free the nemesis. Odds are he'll escape somehow anyways.
~~~
There's a plague going around. A rather nasty plague. It's spread so rapidly that basically every human on the planet has it now. There are those guys hanging out in Antartica, but who cares about them anyways?

Well apparently those folks are really good at science and have cooked up a cure to the plague. Several cures to the plague, actually. The main reason being that they can't seem to iron out the rather extreme side effects of each version.

Thanks to their efforts, you can get your hands on one of the cures pretty easy. The question is... which one will you choose? Or will you refrain from choosing a cure and suffer through weeks of pain and suffering and a 70% chance of death/30% chance of survival?

Spoiler: The Cures (click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on July 03, 2018, 03:10:51 pm
There's a plague going around. A rather nasty plague. It's spread so rapidly that basically every human on the planet has it now. There are those guys hanging out in Madagascar, but who cares about them anyways?
ftfy

Coma cure would have to be the one. Fairly straightforward, highest chance of survival while several years is an acceptable tradeoff compared to death
The death cure is a high second. Continual pain of the kind which leaves you unable to sleep, nor wake, eventually reduces you to a state of pain induced delirium - the pain doesn't go away, but you're not able to process it fully. The devil is in the details though, boosted immune system sounds great if it means you gain serious immunity to future infections, but I'm worried the ambiguity could also mean a high risk of autoimmune diseases and allergies which would make life unbearable.
Furry cure can be #1 or #3 depending on what the side effects will manifest as. If all your kids had the intelligence of a squirrel or a rare genetic disease afterwards for example, it'd be considerably more worrying than if they were simply born with webbed toes. Too open to know.
Brain cure... 52% of serious effects ranging from severe brain damage to death. No thanks.
Untested cure: All things considered, bretty good. All things are temporary, but doesn't hold a candle to coma & death cure
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 03, 2018, 03:35:14 pm
Coma cure. Trade a few years of your life for the rest of your life, and the continued existence of humanity. Done deal.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on July 03, 2018, 04:32:04 pm
Do we get superpowers with the furry cure? Can we choose the animal/being we are spliced with?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on July 03, 2018, 05:31:25 pm
Do we get superpowers with the furry cure? Can we choose the animal/being we are spliced with?
If you could pick and choose and have kangaroo legs, eagle vision, dog hearing and all that stuff that'd be pretty baller, but I'm imagining in this grimdark world you wouldn't be getting anime-tier animal splicing, you'd be getting serious congenital defects caused by the mismatch of gene expressions of humans with distant genetic relatives. Less elephant men and more elephant man
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 03, 2018, 05:37:39 pm
Do we get superpowers with the furry cure? Can we choose the animal/being we are spliced with?
If you could pick and choose and have kangaroo legs, eagle vision, dog hearing and all that stuff that'd be pretty baller, but I'm imagining in this grimdark world you wouldn't be getting anime-tier animal splicing, you'd be getting serious congenital defects caused by the mismatch of gene expressions of humans with distant genetic relatives. Less elephant men and more elephant man

KHAJIIT HAS WARES TO SELL.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on July 03, 2018, 05:39:20 pm
KHAJIIT HAS WARES TO SELL.
Skyrim belongs to the lusty argonian maids
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 03, 2018, 06:38:12 pm
Do we get superpowers with the furry cure? Can we choose the animal/being we are spliced with?
No control over the splicing, though it will tend to be mammalian.

The Furry Cure won't effect your brain(the blood-brain barrier is a thing) but everything else is fair game. You might get super senses or whatever, but on the other hand, good luck using your smartphone with paws.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on July 03, 2018, 06:42:21 pm
No control over the splicing, though it will tend to be mammalian.

The Furry Cure won't effect your brain(the blood-brain barrier is a thing) but everything else is fair game. You might get super senses or whatever, but on the other hand, good luck using your smartphone with paws.
Is that it? You sacrifice modern convenience of smartphones and other idle bullshit in exchange for actual powers? Yeah boi gimme dat otter lung capacity and sheit. Also don't pretend you're not worldbuilding a post-apocalyptic setting in which humanity has died out and been replaced by various tribes of hybrid human-animal chimeras

I see what you're up to
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on July 03, 2018, 06:43:54 pm
No control over the splicing, though it will tend to be mammalian.

The Furry Cure won't effect your brain(the blood-brain barrier is a thing) but everything else is fair game. You might get super senses or whatever, but on the other hand, good luck using your smartphone with paws.
Is that it? You sacrifice modern convenience of smartphones and other idle bullshit in exchange for actual powers? Yeah boi gimme dat otter lung capacity and sheit. Also don't pretend you're not worldbuilding a post-apocalyptic setting in which humanity has died out and been replaced by various tribes of hybrid human-animal chimeras

I see what you're up to
Not to go on all-fours; that is the Law. Are we not Men?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 03, 2018, 07:14:52 pm
But we all have a beast within, no matter what the good doctor thinks.
~~~
I dunno. I'd miss having hands.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on July 03, 2018, 07:20:58 pm
I dunno. I'd miss having hands.
Adapt, evolve, collect essence
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on July 03, 2018, 07:34:51 pm
Coma cure sounds great, with the slight holdup that you'll be uh, in a coma. During a plague that's killing everyone. Not dying of plague isn't worth much if everyone else is either dying or ALSO in a coma, and you die of dehydration in your sleep or something. So it can be a good choice, but if everyone picks it, goodbye humanity.

Death cure will... probably incapacitate you too, requiring people with other cures to take care of you. And it'll hurt a lot and probably still kill you anyway.

Brain cure has a decent chance of killing you outright or else rendering you unable to care for people on the coma cure. Not a good choice.

Furry cure will... almost certainly save you, relative to the others, excepting coma. And the plus side is that it'll leave you awake and mobile and mentally stable, so you can make sure the people on coma don't just fucking die. And hey, might get superpowers!

Unknown cure isn't worth it when we already have two good options here. Depending on what it does, it could either be a boon for the remaining furry civilization, or just another set of bodies to care for. Hey, who knows! Even if I don't pick it, someone else will, so I don't have to wonder forever. :P


So. Ideally, pick furry to be a caretaker for the majority of people who took coma.


Spoiler: unknown cure edit (click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Grim Portent on July 03, 2018, 09:27:51 pm
I assume Coma Cure putting you into stasis means you don't need to eat or drink, you're just fully vulnerable for the time it takes to end the coma. Which is a problem if you live anywhere you can't expect a building to stand for years without maintenance. Got a safe place to hunker up and it's the best option, but if you have plague immune dependants (pets) then it's not that good. No safe place to hunker and exposure or wild animals might kill you anyway.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 03, 2018, 09:38:49 pm
Except the Coma Cure doesn't actually remove your need to eat or drink. It'll slow down your metabolism(think hibernation bear) but you'll still need help.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Grim Portent on July 03, 2018, 09:48:44 pm
In that case the coma cure is out because if basically everyone has this disease and has to take a cure then you can't rely on basic infrastructure working right, let alone having someone able to keep you on an IV drip and bathe you for years. Whoever needs to care for you also needs to take a cure after all, as do the people who fix water pipes, drive delivery vehicles, grow food, etc.

Animal hybrid cure is probably the best in that case, some people will get screwed over but it's probably easier to adjust to 10% of the population dying and the rest having some odd physical traits than the ratios of dead to living the others leave behind even without the side effects they feature. A few people could gamble on the coma cure and hope that enough other people took more immediate cures to support them, but I wouldnt want to run that risk myself.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 03, 2018, 10:09:05 pm
It seems that I've accidentally made furries too OP. Welp.
~~~
Of every novel by H.G. Wells, if you had to choose one to be self inserted into, which would you choose? And of a random Devil Fruit, a backpack full of Tinker bombs from Worm, or a rifle with unlimited ammo, which would you choose to aid you?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: NRDL on July 03, 2018, 11:32:10 pm
Definitely 20,000 Leagues. Self insert myself into one of the guy's captured by the Nautilus, and try and join the crew. Like, legitimately try, not just play along out of fear and curiosity like the other protagonists.

*googles all the Devil Fruits*

Yeah, regardless of what I actually get it sounds freaking awesome, so I'll take that.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Reelya on July 04, 2018, 08:40:17 pm
How they treated Verne is one of the reasons to despise artistic elitism / hipster 'tude. Initially, critics and scientists loved his books, but then they became popular, so the French literary world did a 180o, and said "well he must be shit then", piling scorn on him until he died, with him only coming back into favor many years after his death.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: NRDL on July 04, 2018, 11:44:07 pm
Damn, it is Verne. My bad.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 05, 2018, 09:49:09 pm
Okay, let's broaden the horizons a bit.

You get the opportunity to live in one fictional world for one week. You enter at the time and place of your choosing. When the week's up(or you die), you're sent back to your original location, at the time you left, completely restored in every way to how you were before you left, the only difference being you keep your memories(filtered of infohazards and the like). In short, your only benefit is the experience. Our reality doesn't run on magic or whatever, so knowledge of spells or cold fusion or whatever the world you visited has won't help you here. So... where would you go?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: NRDL on July 06, 2018, 01:18:22 am
I'd probably want to live on a Culture Orbital for a week. See if I can get access to some sort of virtual reality program that makes me live an entire lifetime ( preferably a hedonistic, carefree Culture lifetime ) in a second. If I can't, I'll just spend the week talking to Minds, getting into drug-fueled orgies, etc, etc.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on July 06, 2018, 06:02:14 am
Okay, let's broaden the horizons a bit.

You get the opportunity to live in one fictional world for one week. You enter at the time and place of your choosing. When the week's up(or you die), you're sent back to your original location, at the time you left, completely restored in every way to how you were before you left, the only difference being you keep your memories(filtered of infohazards and the like). In short, your only benefit is the experience. Our reality doesn't run on magic or whatever, so knowledge of spells or cold fusion or whatever the world you visited has won't help you here. So... where would you go?
I feel like that would ruin me, like the Narnia effect

You're gone for a few hours but it's a whole lifetime. Permanently changes who you are and then you're back, but the ordinary world is ruined to you and you can't go back. Questioning everything you knew about the world as being so wrong on the most fundamental level. I'd probably ramp it up and make sure I'd die in the fictional world at the end of the week, so coming back to life would make it even more distressing but meaningful. I believe some of us experience such things which radically alter our perspectives of the world, like standing amidst the open ocean's powerful grip under the starry cosmos, seeing how close our flesh and bone is to its final permutation, a life lived in an environment from which home's comforts are nothing but distractions anymore, and the spirit is roused to great wakeful action. But nothing so radical as experiencing a true world, a different reality. Reminds me of a dream I once had in adolescence, wherein I gave everything up and took a ferry over to France and began walking east, following some path I was convinced was laid out for me. I saw so much, met so many, and after a lifetime I at last found a mountain to climb with a restful spot so sit at the top, and my journey was finished. I awoke, and was thoroughly startled to find it was all a dream that had taken place in hours. But imagine how much more rattling it'd be if you spent that lifetime in a certain reality? What an experience that would be. I'd probably pick the setting I went to completely at random
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: x2yzh9 on July 06, 2018, 05:38:53 pm
If you guys could rule the world for one month and that's it, what would you do? At the end of the first month, all countries go back to their respective borders, but what you implemented still is in effect, or maybe for an added variable, it is with the knowledge that if you have not made the appropriate changes within that month-countries could hypothetically revert those changes, if you didn't use that month to maximum benefit. Or did we already discuss this earlier in the thread? I thought it would be a productive response to the topic.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: NRDL on July 06, 2018, 05:41:28 pm
What's our level of control here? Do we only control governmental branches and powers, or do we have dictatorial control over the individual lives of everybody?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on July 06, 2018, 07:35:32 pm
Build a really tall statue of myself with a generator inside powering point defense cannons so that nobody can knock it down.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: bloop_bleep on July 07, 2018, 11:32:27 am
Solve World Hunger.™
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on July 07, 2018, 11:35:01 am
Ban the next poster from the internet, and from using public restrooms
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 07, 2018, 12:23:42 pm
Hey guys what's u-░§_◙è╝   ß§ æ▓.œΩžÐ   ÿ   δ -

ERROR ▓Ωœ1: user deleted from reality
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MrRoboto75 on July 07, 2018, 12:29:57 pm
Hey guys what's u-░§_◙è╝   ß§ æ▓.œΩžÐ   ÿ   δ -

ERROR ▓Ωœ1: user deleted from reality

MonikaS
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on July 07, 2018, 01:03:10 pm
Hey guys what's u-░§_◙è╝   ß§ æ▓.œΩžÐ   ÿ   δ -

ERROR ▓Ωœ1: user deleted from reality

MonikaS

Oh, how I wish this were a real emote.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 16, 2018, 05:42:06 pm
You wake up and you find that your house has been packed full of various fictional characters. Not all of them speak english, and quite a few possess potent supernatural abilities. You also seem to have become a Time Lord for some reason, and Cybermen are marching the streets of your city. What do?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on July 16, 2018, 05:44:59 pm
Do something highly improbable with a screwdriver.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 17, 2018, 01:56:12 pm
Watch a better show fite me
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on July 20, 2018, 01:12:14 pm
How much would you give up for eternal youth? You don't pay in money, but in your life. Amnesia? Poor health? Faulty senses? How much would you be willing to sacrifice?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 20, 2018, 01:46:13 pm
You have to provide options, or else I can offer the contents of today's lunchbox for immortality.

On that note, it's leftover mashed potatoes and a sandwich. I'm off to enjoy my eternal life now, peace out.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TamerVirus on July 20, 2018, 01:51:09 pm
Eternal youth
Not Eternal life

Given how you've given up your lunchbox, you're bound to starve to death now.
But at least you'll look young and snazzy whilst dying.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 20, 2018, 01:55:45 pm
Joke's on you I have food in my desk, too.

It's not as good as home-cooked food, but hey.

Anyway is this DnD halting of aging in that you just sort of keel over at 95 for no apparent reason even though your body is young? That's cool too, mind you.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on July 20, 2018, 02:19:22 pm
Assuming that means immortality, I'd give all of the memories I've made up to now. Essentially starting a whole new life, but one that won't end. If that means not-immortality, or stupid monkey's paw immortality where I get to sit around in an empty universe for all eternity once everything but me's succumbed to entropy, no deal.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Rockeater on July 20, 2018, 02:22:04 pm
I don't know, just being a teen for the rest of my life does worth something, not too much though
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Caz on July 20, 2018, 02:40:26 pm
I don't know, just being a teen for the rest of my life does worth something, not too much though

Go back to the time before your frontal lobe was developed, great idea.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on July 20, 2018, 02:41:27 pm
Eh, who knows what side effects there might be to that, or how much it will cost from the magical hypothetical-giver. I'd rather stick with the normal human planned obsolescence. At least that way I know roughly what I'm getting.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: NRDL on July 25, 2018, 11:48:41 pm
You can give a command to the entire people's of the Earth. Conditions:

1. The command can only be done once. If you were to say "Everyone on Earth must give me a back rub", once somebody gives you a back rub, they've completed your command. Strictly one time order. Order cannot be stretched out over time intentionally, no exploits for infinite duration can be used. Once the order is given, it will be completed as time efficiently as possible.

2. You can specify sub groups of humanity. So if say, you wanted "All comedians on Earth must go to my house to do a live stand up show" only people who can justify the status of comedian will be affected. Naturally, you'd have to argue what classifies a comedian, going by that example.

3. Command will not affect you.

What's your order?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on July 25, 2018, 11:50:47 pm
I order you in specific to allow me to edit your post in such a way allowing me to perform this power an unlimited number of times.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: NRDL on July 25, 2018, 11:51:26 pm
Joke's on you, I'm not human.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Maximum Spin on July 26, 2018, 12:50:27 am
"Everyone who does not consent to my permanent autocratic rule shall peacefully report for termination immediately."
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: NRDL on July 26, 2018, 12:59:30 am
Pretty sure you've just ordered the mass suicide of the human race apart from extremely submissive people.

I mean, if that's what you intended, that's great.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 30, 2018, 02:19:27 pm
Yodel in unison
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Rockeater on July 30, 2018, 02:29:39 pm
Get us to post scarsity socaity
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on July 30, 2018, 06:20:44 pm
Renounce lima beans as food
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on August 03, 2018, 07:13:58 pm
If you've committed a felony and haven't been caught, turn yourself in to the police peacefully.
~~~
A massive portal opens in New York City. Technologically advanced aliens spill out and demand a blood sacrifice. Literally. A sacrifice of ten thousand gallons of human blood. They then put you in charge of acquiring that blood. How do you go about this?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on August 03, 2018, 07:18:41 pm
"Hello, commander..."
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on August 04, 2018, 07:15:19 am
If they dont demand them with a time by just packing their way expired units.

If they demand them at once, you don't, as there is not enough human blood to comply with the request
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on August 04, 2018, 10:26:42 am
Back off, Nuke the site from orbit. Only way to be sure.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Reelya on August 26, 2018, 03:20:59 am
Recent SMBC

https://www.smbc-comics.com/comic/disc-world

I put it here, because hypothetically how would you deal with situation?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Rockeater on August 26, 2018, 04:58:24 am
Probobly live them on their own
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Grim Portent on August 26, 2018, 05:23:08 am
Stick them somewhere safe and feed them, probably talk to them from time to time and try to explain the scale of things outside the plate and try to understand more about the life on the plate.

If things can be explained well enough back and forth then bringing them to the attention of scientists would be an obvious step after a while.

We're basically talking about a civilization that fits into a space smaller than a hamster cage and probably needs less food, but experiences time on a scale that allows it to ask questions we can comprehend at a volume we can hear. It's not a huge thing to take care of if you can handle a goldfish.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Reelya on August 26, 2018, 06:26:58 am
We're basically talking about a civilization that fits into a space smaller than a hamster cage and probably needs less food

And then all the world's call centres are redirected there.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on August 28, 2018, 03:35:49 pm
Open dialogue, figure out how they handle issues such as energy sources and tool use on a super-micro scale, and apply them to our reality.

Be rich forever and probably solve half the world's practical problems.

Also, see the "Lisa Creates Life" episode of Simpsons.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: KittyTac on September 23, 2018, 06:03:47 am
What if you had near-absolute control over websites, all with being completely anonymous? Like, the ability to ban or unban anyone, the ability to edit databases or code, edit posts, see people's IP, etc., all while maintaining complete anonymity?

I would basically act as a second admin to Bay12, except more active.

But then... I would do bad things to 4chan. let's start:
a) I would make a thread that goes like this: "Something very bad is about to happen to this website..."

b) I would then listen to people's bewildered remarks.

c) After 15 minutes have passed, I would commence The Purge. Ban all of the users, erase all of the databases, code, and possible backups, destroy ALL of the boards. Then make a website that hosts cute kitten pictures at that domain instead. Meow!

Then I'd offer my services to Google or the government, and then continue acting as a good admin for random forums.

What would you do if you had those powers?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on September 24, 2018, 06:51:20 pm
Like, all of them?

Commence dark web vigilantism. Enjoy free access to paywalled journal sites.

Maybe troll someone on occasion.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on September 25, 2018, 12:39:42 pm
Go mad with power immediately, if not sooner.

Edit internet to make it seem like I went mad with power sooner, maybe in the 1700's or so.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on September 27, 2018, 06:57:42 am
What would you do if you had those powers?
Ban every google, reddit, facebook, twitter, instagram account and so forth, usher in the age of anonymous information for everyone. Seems like a no brainer. Also bullying /ck/ and /po/ seems mean, they never did anything to deserve death
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: KittyTac on September 27, 2018, 07:03:04 am
As I said, I'd tell the Google management about my powers and offer to work on retrieving information for them for a lot of money. While anonymously taking a look at their databases (I want to see how that stuff works).
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on September 27, 2018, 07:21:39 am
As I said, I'd tell the Google management about my powers and offer to work on retrieving information for them for a lot of money. While anonymously taking a look at their databases (I want to see how that stuff works).
Imo with such awesome power any amount of money is beneath you, and certainly Google management. You'd end up having a shot to bring back the wild west of the internet except in an age where there are billions of internet users, you can bet your rectums that working as a Google online content policer would be a grievous waste of potential and a certified crime against imagination

Also it'd be absolutely mandatory that if you were to make the mistake of doing so publicly, you would only allow yourself to be identified via hackerman memes
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: KittyTac on September 27, 2018, 07:39:11 am
Yeah, I could enforce internet freedom. But then again, it's a free ticket for millions of dollars. Money, dear boy (https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MoneyDearBoy).

But your opinion is your opinion. That's what this thread is about, what you would do with X superpower.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on September 27, 2018, 08:15:02 am
Yeah, I could enforce internet freedom. But then again, it's a free ticket for millions of dollars. Money, dear boy (https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MoneyDearBoy).

But your opinion is your opinion. That's what this thread is about, what you would do with X superpower.
Which is precisely what I'm getting at - you get X superpower, why chase after money of all things? It's the least compelling motive where extraordinary capabilities are concerned. The question is fundamentally asking what would you do if certain or all material constraints upon your will were removed overnight. Chasing after a material leverage for a constraint which does not affect you precludes the next inevitable question, what will you do when you have your desired sum of cash and that self-imposed constraint is gone?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: KittyTac on September 27, 2018, 08:50:56 am
Yeah, I could enforce internet freedom. But then again, it's a free ticket for millions of dollars. Money, dear boy (https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MoneyDearBoy).

But your opinion is your opinion. That's what this thread is about, what you would do with X superpower.
Which is precisely what I'm getting at - you get X superpower, why chase after money of all things? It's the least compelling motive where extraordinary capabilities are concerned. The question is fundamentally asking what would you do if certain or all material constraints upon your will were removed overnight. Chasing after a material leverage for a constraint which does not affect you precludes the next inevitable question, what will you do when you have your desired sum of cash and that self-imposed constraint is gone?
After obliterating 4chan and securing a job as a Google online content policier?

Vigilantry. Go into forums and banhammer anyone who breaks the forum rules, then disappear. Bust cybercrime. Forcibly clean up forums. Maybe rename trolls' accounts to "PenisDick2010". That's what I would do. Basically, goof off.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: scourge728 on September 27, 2018, 09:21:53 am
I'd probably just enforce fair use, and then just screw around with things
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ggamer on September 27, 2018, 10:10:19 am
Find other people in IT who would know much better than me how best to use this power, and get them to tell me what to do.

Although I do think this opens up to a broader discussion on information ethics. When is it ethical to deplatform a radical group? Precedence tells us that only those who directly incite violence should be silenced. I don't really know, but we could probably start by instantly banning anyone who harrasses other people on social media. Clean the place up a little bit, maybe even make something like twitter actually pleasant.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: scourge728 on September 27, 2018, 11:21:26 am
That reminds me, would definitely be banning trump
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Caz on September 27, 2018, 11:45:45 am
Go mad with power immediately, if not sooner.

Pretty much. Dominion over the internet is pretty much dominion over the world. U L T I M A T E P O W E R




Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: MorleyDev on September 27, 2018, 11:57:56 am
What if you had near-absolute control over websites, all with being completely anonymous? Like, the ability to ban or unban anyone, the ability to edit databases or code, edit posts, see people's IP, etc., all while maintaining complete anonymity?

Isn't this basically the plot of Deus Ex? :)

I mean, going full Bob Page isn't a bad idea. Manipulating world events whilst keeping governments under control via an artificial plague, and then merging with a supercomputer and becoming a god is basically how I want to spend my twilight years.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: GiglameshDespair on September 28, 2018, 08:01:02 am
I would basically act as a second admin to Bay12, except more active.

...

Then I'd offer my services to Google or the government, and then continue acting as a good admin for random forums.
Except I doubt Toady would appreciate some rando appointing themselves moderator.

Same with whatever random forums you decide to mess with.

It'd probably end up giving them more work since they'll have to deal with unbanning and sorting out your victims, and trying to find out why and who is doing it.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: KittyTac on September 28, 2018, 08:08:11 am
I would basically act as a second admin to Bay12, except more active.

...

Then I'd offer my services to Google or the government, and then continue acting as a good admin for random forums.
Except I doubt Toady would appreciate some rando appointing themselves moderator.

Same with whatever random forums you decide to mess with.

It'd probably end up giving them more work since they'll have to deal with unbanning and sorting out your victims, and trying to find out why and who is doing it.
Not if I do not announce my presence. It's as if the users just untraceably banned themselves. I mean, I could include a ban reason. Most forums support that feature.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: GiglameshDespair on September 28, 2018, 08:18:52 am
And all it takes is one person to appeal, and Toady looks and thinks: "I don't remember banning this person."

It's not like many people are banned from bay12, after all.

And then he has to try and work out what's causing random people to get banned. If it only happens after they post something you find objectionable, it wouldn't be too hard to connect the dots after a while and work out someone was doing it, even if they can't discover who.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: KittyTac on September 28, 2018, 09:29:50 am
But on other, more ban-happy forums, these bannings would get buried under actual bannings. Especially if those forums are facing a troll attack and the moderators are overloaded. THAT would be helpful.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: George_Chickens on September 28, 2018, 09:31:51 am
This sounds increasingly like an untenable power fantasy and not a what if
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: KittyTac on September 28, 2018, 09:37:50 am
This sounds increasingly like an untenable power fantasy and not a what if
And what? It's not like these powers are possible in real life. But this is getting pretty prolonged for a what if, I agree.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TD1 on September 28, 2018, 10:38:15 am
I dare say I would do my best to ignore my awesome internet-powers. I'd probably cave every now and then and be petty, but for the most part I like to think that I would realise that my opinion/impression does not mean a huge amount. Who am I to be Fudge, Judy and Exchequer?* Basically; carry on as normal. I do not want to impose my subjective system of morals over such a huge body as the internet.
 
*KittyTac, I know that was you. Stop it please.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: GiglameshDespair on September 28, 2018, 10:52:57 am
But on other, more ban-happy forums, these bannings would get buried under actual bannings. Especially if those forums are facing a troll attack and the moderators are overloaded. THAT would be helpful.

I don't think there's many forums that have so many bannings that they can't keep track of them all, and even if they do... it falls down if any of those people appeal their banning, or you get the rules wrong, or over-react...

It's like you see someone committing burglary so you kidnap them and keep them in your basement for a few years. Yeah, burglary carries the penalty of imprisonment, but somehow I doubt the police would be impressed with your act of good citizenry, aye?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on September 28, 2018, 01:33:01 pm
This sounds increasingly like an untenable power fantasy and not a what if
And what? It's not like these powers are possible in real life. But this is getting pretty prolonged for a what if, I agree.
We watch Superman knowing that there is no laser vision or super strength, it's all about asking what we want to will into action and why. So for example, my desire to destroy all identifiable social media information and meta-information is because I desire an anonymous arena of free ideas and content, constrained not by egos or commercial interest, as my belief believes me to believe this will usher in the golden age of information - which to me, would be a more pleasing vision for how I would see the future unfold. I am guessing you in turn would be an online content policer because you believe dicking over helpless and acceptable targets would be 1. hilarious, and 2. conducive towards a moderated internet, which in turn would be for you a more pleasing internet. This is where the "what if's" become really delicious, because it effectively asks you to define your own character motivations if you yourself was a character in fiction, then ask how the world would respond to you if you were to become unaccountably and undeservedly powerful :]
So we learn about ourselves and others, 1337 hackermans of hypothetical vision
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on September 28, 2018, 01:44:21 pm
Remove consequences via anonymity
 
Trust human nature to regulate itself
 
No further action required
 
Utopia
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on September 28, 2018, 03:39:33 pm
I'd accidentally usher in an age of oppressive communistic wealth redistribution as I tried to right what I saw as societal wrongs until eventually my lack of economic understanding destroyed the fundamentals of the world economy, bringing about a social apocalypse of unprecedented proportions.

Then I'd force some random asshole I think I could beat into sword fighting me on a rooftop during a thunderstorm while I hammed it up like a motherfucker. After my inevitable defeat (cuz fucking Chad didn't put "Took fencing classes once" on his goddamn Facebook) I would lead a monastic life of celibacy from computer use as the world slowly recovered from the terrible wounds I had inflicted on it, until the day aliens come and it is revealed I never needed access to a computer to use my power and Inexplicably Good Swordsman Chad and I team up to take down the invading aliens.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: KittyTac on September 28, 2018, 09:29:18 pm
This sounds increasingly like an untenable power fantasy and not a what if
And what? It's not like these powers are possible in real life. But this is getting pretty prolonged for a what if, I agree.
We watch Superman knowing that there is no laser vision or super strength, it's all about asking what we want to will into action and why. So for example, my desire to destroy all identifiable social media information and meta-information is because I desire an anonymous arena of free ideas and content, constrained not by egos or commercial interest, as my belief believes me to believe this will usher in the golden age of information - which to me, would be a more pleasing vision for how I would see the future unfold. I am guessing you in turn would be an online content policer because you believe dicking over helpless and acceptable targets would be 1. hilarious, and 2. conducive towards a moderated internet, which in turn would be for you a more pleasing internet. This is where the "what if's" become really delicious, because it effectively asks you to define your own character motivations if you yourself was a character in fiction, then ask how the world would respond to you if you were to become unaccountably and undeservedly powerful :]
So we learn about ourselves and others, 1337 hackermans of hypothetical vision
Exactly.

Before the "KittyTac hates Roblox" jokes commence, here's a thing:
a) Go to the Roblox website.

b) Literally wipe the admins' accounts from existence with my database-editing.

c) Appoint myself sole admin.

d) Delete the Roblox download link from the main site. Remember that I am the only admin left.

e) Slamdunk the main page with porn. Because it's hilarious.

f) Leave the site in such condition.

This is potentially still fixable if someone hacks to appoint him/herself as an admin and cleans up the mess I left, but I doubt it.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on September 28, 2018, 09:48:36 pm
Hey KittyTac I'm legit one of the last people left on the forum that hasn't brought that up and is willing to defend you. Just fyi. You made a rude mistake and that's fine. I've done so many many times. As long as you learned literally anything from it, I support you.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: KittyTac on September 28, 2018, 10:33:39 pm
Hey KittyTac I'm legit one of the last people left on the forum that hasn't brought that up and is willing to defend you. Just fyi. You made a rude mistake and that's fine. I've done so many many times. As long as you learned literally anything from it, I support you.
Just forget it.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: George_Chickens on September 28, 2018, 10:38:52 pm
If I had that power I would destroy all the Roblox accounts. Then I'd go to work for Google or something.

But actually, to be 100% serious, my power fantasy is strategically shutting down sites and chasing off people until we can completely halt the centralized grip over the internet and return to Web 1.0. EVERYTHING can get its own forum and people can learn not to spill their personal information out once again. Oh, I would also replace Reddit with Lastmeasure. Also, what LoudWhispers said too.

It would be like, very very perfect and shit. I would like it.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: KittyTac on September 29, 2018, 12:57:53 am
I would pretty much make an authoritarian centralized internet. Then obliterate those communities that are disruptive. Part of my personality.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on September 29, 2018, 01:11:51 am
I'd appoint LW as undisputed high queen of the internet, download a copy of every single game/movie/etc. on the internet, and put the powers away.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TD1 on September 29, 2018, 03:30:53 am
If you want to shake up the internet, I guess you have to put a 'Scanner in charge.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: KittyTac on September 29, 2018, 05:42:12 am
Oh, and sites similar to 4chan won't be spared from my rampages. Erased from existence. Incels will also be obliterated.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on September 29, 2018, 09:40:41 am
I'd appoint LW as undisputed high queen of the internet, download a copy of every single game/movie/etc. on the internet, and put the powers away.
IT BEGINS (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IBH4g_ua5es)

Oh, and sites similar to 4chan won't be spared from my rampages. Erased from existence. Incels will also be obliterated.
Wouldn't unlisted imageboards be spared from your rampage?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: GiglameshDespair on September 29, 2018, 09:43:44 am
Oh, and sites similar to 4chan won't be spared from my rampages. Erased from existence. Incels will also be obliterated.
The users don't stop existing because just because you attacked their website. They'll just go elsewhere to other forums.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: KittyTac on September 29, 2018, 09:47:22 am
Oh, and sites similar to 4chan won't be spared from my rampages. Erased from existence. Incels will also be obliterated.
The users don't stop existing because just because you attacked their website. They'll just go elsewhere to other forums.
If they carry 4chan's personality with them, they're likely to just get banned without my intervention.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on September 29, 2018, 09:48:28 am
If they carry 4chan's personality with them, they're likely to just get banned without my intervention.
Banning is no obstacle to them either tbh
Pouring water on oil
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: KittyTac on September 29, 2018, 09:58:44 am
If they carry 4chan's personality with them, they're likely to just get banned without my intervention.
Banning is no obstacle to them either tbh
Pouring water on oil
Still, they would be less annoying without their "headquarters". At least people could deal with them more easily.

Repeat for every annoying, politically-charged community.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on September 29, 2018, 10:35:35 am
Still, they would be less annoying without their "headquarters". At least people could deal with them more easily.

Repeat for every annoying, politically-charged community.
The whole point of any non-hierarchical entity is that it doesn't have a headquarters, with any disruption to 4chan merely resulting in the distribution of its users across the internet like oil over water, spreading them to unlisted sites or communication channels where it's impossible to keep track of all of them. What you'd want to do to kill all of them by the source is just eradicate all anonymity and have it so that all usage of the internet requires identification to be displayed, so that what people post online has repercussions to their life, just as if they posted something on twitter or facebook
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: KittyTac on September 29, 2018, 10:51:32 am
Still, they would be less annoying without their "headquarters". At least people could deal with them more easily.

Repeat for every annoying, politically-charged community.
The whole point of any non-hierarchical entity is that it doesn't have a headquarters, with any disruption to 4chan merely resulting in the distribution of its users across the internet like oil over water, spreading them to unlisted sites or communication channels where it's impossible to keep track of all of them. What you'd want to do to kill all of them by the source is just eradicate all anonymity and have it so that all usage of the internet requires identification to be displayed, so that what people post online has repercussions to their life, just as if they posted something on twitter or facebook
Did you read what my occupation would be? A corporate/government informant. That has been taken care of.

Now, here's a modification of the what-if.

The same thing, except all users who commented on this what-if were granted those powers simultaneously. What would you do?

The internet would be a warzone, I guess, as I would try to sabotage LW, Dunamisdeos, and George while furthering my agenda. I could make a forum game about this.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TD1 on September 29, 2018, 11:49:52 am
And for the lols, I would edit said forum game so it is about dressing KittyTac up as a cat. Or a portly old gentleman. Haven't decided yet.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on September 29, 2018, 12:01:24 pm
I suspect the only thing that would change about mine is that I'd end up sword fighting a Forumite on the rooftop, and no offense guys, but I'm in quite good shape and I'm a pretty big guy.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TD1 on September 29, 2018, 12:03:30 pm
But would nevertheless lose as a result of your general inexperience with a blade.

Let's assume that Bay12 gets to nominate its champion - and I firmly believe it should - then we will likely choose Arx.

And you will be el screwdo.

Edit: Or me, I guess, though that would entail two big fellas in quite good shape slapping at each other ineffectually with swords.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on September 29, 2018, 12:11:31 pm
I'm pretty good with a short walking stick, what kinda swords would we use?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TD1 on September 29, 2018, 12:22:49 pm
I daresay I could wield a fencing post with some level of dexterity.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on September 29, 2018, 02:05:10 pm
I can hit things with sticks.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on September 29, 2018, 02:10:16 pm
Did you read what my occupation would be? A corporate/government informant. That has been taken care of.
A sole informant dealing with billions of people is a task which is beyond me, and probably you - hence why with such a power, the most likely way to have any measure of success would be to alter the environment and let everyone else do the work for you

The internet would be a warzone, I guess, as I would try to sabotage LW, Dunamisdeos, and George while furthering my agenda. I could make a forum game about this.
I would immediately change it so that if you don't do 20 push ups or sit ups or squats every 1 hour, your internet bandwidth will slow to a tantalising crawl. This would hopefully have the desired effect of making everyone swoler
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on September 29, 2018, 02:13:52 pm
I suspect the only thing that would change about mine is that I'd end up sword fighting a Forumite on the rooftop, and no offense guys, but I'm in quite good shape and I'm a pretty big guy.

And I actually know how to use a sword. Which means that I know that how big you are isn't actually massively important when we're using swords. :v
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: GiglameshDespair on September 29, 2018, 02:31:20 pm
I suspect the only thing that would change about mine is that I'd end up sword fighting a Forumite on the rooftop, and no offense guys, but I'm in quite good shape and I'm a pretty big guy.

And I actually know how to use a sword. Which means that I know that how big you are isn't actually massively important when we're using swords. :v
I think if someone six foot fought someone with dwarfism, that his size may compose some part of his advantage
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Hanslanda on September 29, 2018, 03:24:44 pm
I suspect the only thing that would change about mine is that I'd end up sword fighting a Forumite on the rooftop, and no offense guys, but I'm in quite good shape and I'm a pretty big guy.

And I actually know how to use a sword. Which means that I know that how big you are isn't actually massively important when we're using swords. :v
I think if someone six foot fought someone with dwarfism, that his size may compose some part of his advantage


It's the size of the fight in the dog mate, not the size of the dog in the fight. Though, yeah, size can constitute some nice advantages. It also brings some disadvantages.

I know enough about sword fighting to want a shield, and I wouldn't be parrying because that's how you end up with sword halves.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on September 29, 2018, 03:34:04 pm
Quote
For years now, Berners-Lee and other internet activists have been dreaming of a digital utopia where individuals control their own data and the internet remains free and open. But for Berners-Lee, the time for dreaming is over.
My nipples could cut diamonds (http://archive.is/8Wfdx#selection-645.363-645.590)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on September 29, 2018, 04:30:41 pm
I suspect the only thing that would change about mine is that I'd end up sword fighting a Forumite on the rooftop, and no offense guys, but I'm in quite good shape and I'm a pretty big guy.

And I actually know how to use a sword. Which means that I know that how big you are isn't actually massively important when we're using swords. :v
I think if someone six foot fought someone with dwarfism, that his size may compose some part of his advantage


It's the size of the fight in the dog mate, not the size of the dog in the fight. Though, yeah, size can constitute some nice advantages. It also brings some disadvantages.

I know enough about sword fighting to want a shield, and I wouldn't be parrying because that's how you end up with sword halves.

I can hit things with two sticks.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TD1 on September 29, 2018, 04:38:43 pm
I'm six three and own fire arms. And have military training in battle tactics and gun usage.

There. Battle won :P
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on September 29, 2018, 05:30:27 pm
I'm bigger than you and I have two sticks so far, come at me.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: KittyTac on September 29, 2018, 08:31:46 pm
I didn't mean physically fighting. Okay, while you are swordfighting, I establish an authoritarian internet.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on September 29, 2018, 08:46:52 pm
I didn't mean physically fighting. Okay, while you are swordfighting, I establish an authoritarian internet.
I would support this if the eternal sovereign authority was a self-learning chatbot
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: KittyTac on September 29, 2018, 08:49:54 pm
I didn't mean physically fighting. Okay, while you are swordfighting, I establish an authoritarian internet.
I would support this if the eternal sovereign authority was a self-learning chatbot
To be fair, any of the users here could be an advanced chatbot pretending to be a human.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on September 29, 2018, 09:05:40 pm
To be fair, any of the users here could be an advanced chatbot pretending to be a human.
thank you for your shared.input error#56 fellow human

Reminds me of an old text based game. Can't remember the name of it, but it worked with other chat bots. It was pretty great, you had to convince other humans that you were human too, in a world where machines were exterminating the last remnants of humanity. The plot twist was that you were a machine that believed it was a human, programmed to earnestly convince itself and other humans into giving their location out
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TamerVirus on October 01, 2018, 04:40:48 pm
Damned synths...
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on October 02, 2018, 06:16:27 am
Damned synths...
The humans are... (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDqHoxVHW_s)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Rowanas on October 02, 2018, 06:59:23 am
Damned synths...
The humans are... (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDqHoxVHW_s)

The robots are... (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghFtR64y0XQ)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: FallacyofUrist on January 19, 2019, 03:10:16 pm
Reanimate!
Reanimate!
Reanimate!

(The new hypothetical is related).

New hypothetical...

You gain the ability to touch a dead person and bring them back to life, provided they died in the past week. The restoration brings them back to good health(for someone of their age). You can't revive the same person twice.

What happens?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Dunamisdeos on January 19, 2019, 04:21:07 pm
Charge for services, be rich?
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on January 19, 2019, 07:06:33 pm



The robots are... (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghFtR64y0XQ)
What does he want?????
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on January 20, 2019, 08:08:57 pm
New hypothetical...

You gain the ability to touch a dead person and bring them back to life, provided they died in the past week. The restoration brings them back to good health(for someone of their age). You can't revive the same person twice.

What happens?
There was this one lad who was a carpenter...
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TD1 on January 20, 2019, 08:18:37 pm
Whose wit was keener than a sharpener.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Egan_BW on February 02, 2019, 07:17:13 am
You are given a choice between the following options and must pick one.

A: Over the course of the next 1 second, you feel the sum total of all the pain and suffering you would feel over the course of the rest of your life. Afterwards, you live your life feeling only happiness and no suffering.
B: over the course of the next 1 second, you feel the sum total of all the joy and happiness you would feel over the course of the rest of your life. Afterwards, you live your life feeling only suffering and no happiness.
C: as with A, except the 1 second of suffering comes to you at the end of your life.
D: as with B, except the 1 second of happiness comes to you at the end of your life.
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: ChairmanPoo on February 02, 2019, 08:12:05 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: Loud Whispers on February 02, 2019, 10:59:19 am
You are given a choice between the following options and must pick one.

A: Over the course of the next 1 second, you feel the sum total of all the pain and suffering you would feel over the course of the rest of your life. Afterwards, you live your life feeling only happiness and no suffering.
B: over the course of the next 1 second, you feel the sum total of all the joy and happiness you would feel over the course of the rest of your life. Afterwards, you live your life feeling only suffering and no happiness.
C: as with A, except the 1 second of suffering comes to you at the end of your life.
D: as with B, except the 1 second of happiness comes to you at the end of your life.
Lol I already picked option B
Title: Re: Hypothetical: What do you do? (What if you had the cure for cancer)
Post by: TD1 on February 02, 2019, 11:02:59 am
All of those options are horrible. The happy life ones seem like what would happen if Rand al Thor killed the Dark One.