How did it go this wrong? What happened in your life that you deserved this? What divine being or nasty politician did you get on the wrong side of to wind up here?
And what do you do now?
You've been taken. Kidnapped. Stolen. Hijacked. You're trapped on an awful, unstylish, decrepit old space ship, adrift in the cosmos, run by an insane, sarcastic A.I. (is there any other kind?)
You've been designated as "essential crew" by the A.I. And must now struggle to survive in this mechanical monstrosity, filled with the smells of broken space equipment, biological stench, and mold. Mold everywhere. probably ought to get that checked. Because this ship does NOT look like it was intended as an agricultural endeavor. Not that you really know.
Well, roll up your sleeves, time to get to work.
This is another shitty Ozarck game. You are unwilling crewmembers on a spaceship that is on it's last legs. Your goal is survival, and maybe eventually escape or profit. Or whatever.
Name:
Species:
Description:
Preferred Gravity: (High, medium, low)
Preferred atmosphere: (oxygen, water, ammonia, plasma, etc.)
Previous occupation:
Miscellaneous:
Life Support: UNKNOWN
Engines: UNKNOWN
Gravity: currently functional. you stick to the floor, somehow.
Life Support: UNKNOWN
Navigation: UNKNOWN
Communications: UNKNOWN
Sensors: UNKNOWN
Weaponry: UNKNOWN
A.I: irritable. snarky
Medical: UNKNOWN
crew quarters: UNKNOWN
Cargo: UNKNOWN
Captain: UNFILLED
Vice Captain: UNFILLED
First Officer: UNFILLED
Chief of Medicine: UNFILLED
Quartermaster: UNFILLED
Master Engineer: UNFILLED
Navigator: David Freeman - absent
Janitor: UNFILLED
Financial Officer: UNFILLED
Communications Officer: UNFILLED
Sensor Tech: UNFILLED
Other: UNSPECIFIED
"We'll see what we can do with that," the bundle of eels mentions in a disturbingly musical voice, like a chorus of little birds singing around a princess.
Try to find a map of the ship somewhere. Ideally for technical things, power lines and processing locations, but even a simple "crew quarters here, bathrooms there" would be handy.
Name: Sirirx
Species: Vetan
Description: An old-timey space suit filled with eternally writhing eels.
Preferred Gravity: High
Preferred atmosphere: Ammonia
Previous occupation: Marrow Farmer
Miscellaneous: These crewmates look kinda tasty...
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
Explore the ship, and put anything shiny I happen to come across on my back
Name: Rosomio
Species: Space Human
Description:He is a tall skinny human, around 6'5. His skin is gray and has a habit of slouching around. He is a timid fellow and always have a negative view on everything. His long hair is black and unkempt, and his eyes are droopy. He was born in a space station settlement that was once owned by the short lived Iberian Empire. Rosomio has a heavy Iberian accent, and has a monotone voice.
Preferred Gravity:Low
Preferred atmosphere:Oxygen
Previous occupation:Botanist
Miscellaneous:He's really good at sneaking around without people noticing him. He was also taught how to shoot a gun to defend against space raiders back home.
”sigh...I guess this is it for me. Always thought I’ll die in that old amada, but I guess this suits me well. Might as well see if there’s a bar around here“
.”
Explore the Ship in search of a bar or at least a canteen.
"Well I have no idea what that thing was on about, hope it wasn't important."
Start looking around the ship and try to avoid any weak spots in the floor.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Name: Crewbot
Species: Flying Sphere
Description: A sphere with wings that has an exoskeleton made of whatever it found to protect itself. Back on its home planet, it was part of a colony with a queen, soldiers, foragers, nurses and builders.
Preferred Gravity: Low
Preferred atmosphere: ammonia
Previous occupation: ForagersphereNonexistant, Queen Sphere is here
Miscellaneous: May have been brainwashed by the AI to think that the AI is the queen so that Crewbot would stop trying to put pieces of the ship onto its exoskeleton
Look for the speakers and try cleaning them somehow
"Mrh! Koff koff!" Koff complained and coughed and gagged and shook his head.
Once he found an opening, he scampered out of the annoying room and went exploring, using his ears and nose to search for something to eat and/or stalk and/or play with.
Name: Mr. Koff (pronounced "cough")
Species: Cat
Description: An adult, slightly chubby, short-haired grey cat with green eyes. Has a hoarse, grouchy meow.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen
Previous occupation: Chief Mouser
Miscellaneous: Humans still take cats with them in their long voyages for company and pest control, though the pests they chase are somewhat more troublesome. This one stuck his head somewhere he wasn't supposed to and ended up here.
"Hello, fellow crew!" the bot says in a rather cheerful, synthesized voice, even as half of the crew are already leaving the room
"I am Unit 37, here to help you with all your cleaning, maintenance and ERROR, INSUFFICIENT USER PRIVILEGES problems! Just give me a holler if anything is awry!"
Check out the hologram emitter on this table. See if I can't clean or repair it a bit so that at least the sound comes through better.
Then go search for the cleaning and/or maintenance supply room on the ship. Try and find some tools and chemicals that will help clean up all these nasty stains and mold
Name: Sanitation And Maintenance Unit 37
Species: Roomba with extreme upgrades
Description: Unit 37 started out as a simple, circular roomba for the workspace of a certain scientist. Said scientist amused himself with upgrading unit 37 piece by piece, to enable it to take on more cleaning duties, and eventually general maintance as well. Now it looks like a bulky humanoid industrial frame, wearing a grey boilersuit with SANITATION in bold letters. It's only distinguising traits from your run of the mill industrial cleaning bot is that it has one flexible, extendible tentacle attached to the back (to clean those hard to reach spots) and that its head is a a recased Roomba with one big glowing camera for an eye. The tentacle has three gripper claws and an nozzle to dispense cleaning fluid.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Anything non-corrosive (and clean)
Previous occupation: Maintenance and sanitation bot, Roomba (formerly)
Miscellaneous: Has somehow picked up a rather dainty apron somewhere that it has been wearing while on the ship. It's a dainty shade of light purple and says "Chortle, Cherish, Clean".
"We'll see what we can do with that," the bundle of eels mentions in a disturbingly musical voice, like a chorus of little birds singing around a princess.
Try to find a map of the ship somewhere. Ideally for technical things, power lines and processing locations, but even a simple "crew quarters here, bathrooms there" would be handy.
Name: Sirirx
Species: Vetan
Description: An old-timey space suit filled with eternally writhing eels.
Preferred Gravity: High
Preferred atmosphere: Ammonia
Previous occupation: Marrow Farmer
Miscellaneous: These crewmates look kinda tasty...
(5) you don't find a map in the conference room, but you do find ancient lighted strips along the walls that direct people to various points of interest. Naturally, most of the strips are unlighted, covered in mold, or missing. Fun fact: you know the Ship is a long, fat cylinder, like a lumpy soda can. Gravity pulls everything outward toward the rounded hull, but not due to rotation. somethng about the central, stick shaped engine pushes gravity outward radially.
Your suit has (6) turns of beathable ammonia. this counts as one turn.
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
Explore the ship, and put anything shiny I happen to come across on my back
(6) you wander off and find a large, sparkly crystal. you place it on your back securely. It makes a loud, crystally tingling sound. It is very heavy. You move on, slowly dragging yourself through the muck, slipping and sliding as you go.
Name: Rosomio
Species: Space Human
Description:He is a tall skinny human, around 6'5. His skin is gray and has a habit of slouching around. He is a timid fellow and always have a negative view on everything. His long hair is black and unkempt, and his eyes are droopy. He was born in a space station settlement that was once owned by the short lived Iberian Empire. Rosomio has a heavy Iberian accent, and has a monotone voice.
Preferred Gravity:Low
Preferred atmosphere:Oxygen
Previous occupation:Botanist
Miscellaneous:He's really good at sneaking around without people noticing him. He was also taught how to shoot a gun to defend against space raiders back home.
”sigh...I guess this is it for me. Always thought I’ll die in that old amada, but I guess this suits me well. Might as well see if there’s a bar around here“
.”
Explore the Ship in search of a bar or at least a canteen.
(1) you immediately get lost in the darkness. You step in something squishy. there are strange, chittering sounds nearby.
"Well I have no idea what that thing was on about, hope it wasn't important."
Start looking around the ship and try to avoid any weak spots in the floor.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
(1) you also nearly immediately get lost in the darkness. Careful as yu are, you still manage to slip in the slime and fall through what is presumably a hole in the floor. There is an acrid smell in this area, like burning rubber.
Name: Crewbot
Species: Flying Sphere
Description: A sphere with wings that has an exoskeleton made of whatever it found to protect itself. Back on its home planet, it was part of a colony with a queen, soldiers, foragers, nurses and builders.
Preferred Gravity: Low
Preferred atmosphere: ammonia
Previous occupation: ForagersphereNonexistant, Queen Sphere is here
Miscellaneous: May have been brainwashed by the AI to think that the AI is the queen so that Crewbot would stop trying to put pieces of the ship onto its exoskeleton
Look for the speakers and try cleaning them somehow
(1) You find the speakers, but your fiddling muffles the sound, which quickly turns into the sound of choking and gagging before falling eerily silent. Your ammonia processor unit has (6) turns of function, including this one.
Wander off to see if I can find a plasma torch/thrower. Ships have those right?
(3) you think a ship of this size probably has at least one of those somewhere. Probably in the kitchen. Or engineering. You find markings along a wall that direct you in the general direction of engineering.
"Mrh! Koff koff!" Koff complained and coughed and gagged and shook his head.
Once he found an opening, he scampered out of the annoying room and went exploring, using his ears and nose to search for something to eat and/or stalk and/or play with.
Name: Mr. Koff (pronounced "cough")
Species: Cat
Description: An adult, slightly chubby, short-haired grey cat with green eyes. Has a hoarse, grouchy meow.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen
Previous occupation: Chief Mouser
Miscellaneous: Humans still take cats with them in their long voyages for company and pest control, though the pests they chase are somewhat more troublesome. This one stuck his head somewhere he wasn't supposed to and ended up here.
(3) you find the smells of one of humanity's oldest companions: mice. You don't locate any immediately, but you know the ship is at least 'alive' somewhat.
"Hello, fellow crew!" the bot says in a rather cheerful, synthesized voice, even as half of the crew are already leaving the room
"I am Unit 37, here to help you with all your cleaning, maintenance and ERROR, INSUFFICIENT USER PRIVILEGES problems! Just give me a holler if anything is awry!"
Check out the hologram emitter on this table. See if I can't clean or repair it a bit so that at least the sound comes through better.
Then go search for the cleaning and/or maintenance supply room on the ship. Try and find some tools and chemicals that will help clean up all these nasty stains and mold
Name: Sanitation And Maintenance Unit 37
Species: Roomba with extreme upgrades
Description: Unit 37 started out as a simple, circular roomba for the workspace of a certain scientist. Said scientist amused himself with upgrading unit 37 piece by piece, to enable it to take on more cleaning duties, and eventually general maintance as well. Now it looks like a bulky humanoid industrial frame, wearing a grey boilersuit with SANITATION in bold letters. It's only distinguising traits from your run of the mill industrial cleaning bot is that it has one flexible, extendible tentacle attached to the back (to clean those hard to reach spots) and that its head is a a recased Roomba with one big glowing camera for an eye. The tentacle has three gripper claws and an nozzle to dispense cleaning fluid.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Anything non-corrosive (and clean)
Previous occupation: Maintenance and sanitation bot, Roomba (formerly)
Miscellaneous: Has somehow picked up a rather dainty apron somewhere that it has been wearing while on the ship. It's a dainty shade of light purple and says "Chortle, Cherish, Clean".
(3) the holographic emitters (the ones that are currently active, that is) are located in the ceiling above the table. You manage to smear a bit of the gunk away from them, revealing a third functioning emitter. You look again at the hologram and it resolves itself into a female humanoid form. she is clutching her throat and waving, eyes bugged out, mouth agape. She falls to her knees, two feet above the slanted surface of the table, and holds a hand out, pleadingly.
Life Support: UNKNOWN. Oxygen seems okayish, if a bit thin
Engines: UNKNOWN. presumed functional, as gravity works.
Gravity: currently functional. you stick to the floor, somehow.
Life Support: UNKNOWN
Navigation: UNKNOWN
Communications: UNKNOWN
Sensors: UNKNOWN
Weaponry: UNKNOWN
A.I: irritable. snarky. Currently choking to death?
Medical: UNKNOWN
crew quarters: UNKNOWN
Cargo: UNKNOWN
Captain: UNFILLED
Vice Captain: UNFILLED
First Officer: UNFILLED
Chief of Medicine: UNFILLED
Quartermaster: UNFILLED
Master Engineer: UNFILLED
Navigator: David Freeman - absent
Janitor: UNFILLED
Financial Officer: UNFILLED
Communications Officer: UNFILLED
Sensor Tech: UNFILLED
Other: UNSPECIFIED
"Oh dear. I'll need to find a way to flood the ship with ammonia immediately!"
Try to find life support, ideally using those lighted strips.
Name: Sirirx
Species: Vetan
Turns of Ammonia Left: (5)
Description: An old-timey space suit filled with eternally writhing eels.
Preferred Gravity: High
Preferred atmosphere: Ammonia
Previous occupation: Marrow Farmer
Miscellaneous: These crewmates look kinda tasty...
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
”Hrrrgh!”
Find a place to store my amazing find, since it’s so heavy, and call the place my “lair”
"Damn it, this place is such a piece of shit."
Check my pockets and see if I still have my phone on me then use the flashlight on it to see where I've fallen.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Name: Zygomuc
Species: Space fungus
Description: A blob of gray and purple Mold, having achieved sufficient mass to become ambulatory and predatory.
Preferred Gravity: Low
Preferred atmosphere: Pressurized, no composition preference
Previous occupation:Blob of mold
Miscellaneous: It's a colony of space mold, what you not get?
Rise from the grime and try to find why the atmosphere is getting thin.
See if I can help get the speakers back in working order. If unscuccesful try to locate a different set of speakers to reroute the ship AI to.
If speakers are a no-go, ask the AI if it can't just project text instead of projecting its body. If not for some reason, find a screen for the AI to connect to so it can use text to communicate instead.
Name: Sanitation And Maintenance Unit 37
Species: Roomba with extreme upgrades
Description: Unit 37 started out as a simple, circular roomba for the workspace of a certain scientist. Said scientist amused himself with upgrading unit 37 piece by piece, to enable it to take on more cleaning duties, and eventually general maintance as well. Now it looks like a bulky humanoid industrial frame, wearing a grey boilersuit with SANITATION in bold letters. It's only distinguising traits from your run of the mill industrial cleaning bot is that it has one flexible, extendible tentacle attached to the back (to clean those hard to reach spots) and that its head is a a recased Roomba with one big glowing camera for an eye. The tentacle has three gripper claws and an nozzle to dispense cleaning fluid.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Anything non-corrosive (and clean)
Previous occupation: Maintenance and sanitation bot, Roomba (formerly)
Miscellaneous: Has somehow picked up a rather dainty apron somewhere that it has been wearing while on the ship. It's a dainty shade of light purple and says "Chortle, Cherish, Clean".
Hunt/Wait for mice for a while. If that doesn't pan out, then go watch one of the other crewmates, maybe they have food or something to play with.
Name: Mr. Koff (pronounced "cough")
Species: Cat
Description: An adult, slightly chubby, short-haired grey cat with green eyes. Has a hoarse, grouchy meow.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen
Previous occupation: Chief Mouser
Miscellaneous: Humans still take cats with them in their long voyages for company and pest control, though the pests they chase are somewhat more troublesome. This one stuck his head somewhere he wasn't supposed to and ended up here.
"Oh dear. I'll need to find a way to flood the ship with ammonia immediately!"
Try to find life support, ideally using those lighted strips.
Name: Sirirx
Species: Vetan
Turns of Ammonia Left: (5)
Description: An old-timey space suit filled with eternally writhing eels.
Preferred Gravity: High
Preferred atmosphere: Ammonia
Previous occupation: Marrow Farmer
Miscellaneous: These crewmates look kinda tasty...
(2) You end up in what appears to be a convenience store of some sort. there are lots of vending machines, their tasty goodness taunting you fro mbehind the space glass display screens. You eye a pungeant shrimp casserole sandwich hungrily.
"Great, what luck.."
I'll draw a laser pistol from my waist line and stealthy move forward in search of that bar.
(6) You pull out your old smuggler shootin' gun. A warning light blinks alarmingly on the pistol (on a small display panel where the hammer wold be in a revolver). fiddling with the settings, you fire off a sudden, bright burst that strikes a door panel a dozen feet away, sending a shower of sparks and triggering an emergency klaxon and red flashing lights. Hey, you've got light now!
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
”Hrrrgh!”
Find a place to store my amazing find, since it’s so heavy, and call the place my “lair”
(6) You scamper a couple dozen feet, up a small hill, and find a nice cool alcove. As you try to stuff the shiny into the alcove, it suddenly lifts from your back and gets all shiny, like with real light. It nestles inside a slot that seems designed for it, and the entire room illuminates, with blinking lights, shiny screens, and mold everywhere.
(7) A hologram appears in the room, of a silver orb on a metallic neck. "Welcome back, David. We are currently orbiting 34921-7 gamma. Curious, the planet seems %1 larger than at last examination. Do you wish to change course?"
"Damn it, this place is such a piece of shit."
Check my pockets and see if I still have my phone on me then use the flashlight on it to see where I've fallen.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
(6) You pull out your phone and fumble it on, shining your light around. The sudden illumination blinds you and you blink several times, waiting for your sight to readjust. as you do, you hear your voice chime: "Seventy-Five gallons of industrial lard purchase: CONFIRMED. Your confirmation # will be emailed to the linked address. Your balance has been adjusted. You are now fourteen hundred and seventy two credits in the red. All payments rendered will be taken until your account balances."
Your eyes adjust and you see that you fell down a ship's ladder into a lower hallway. the omnipresent dust in the air is accompanied by a definitive black smoke. The source of the thin smoke seems to be somewhere further down the hall, where a second hall intersects this one.
Get away from the speakers, check if they work, if not, try reversing what I did that messed them up, look for something that could be a source of ammonia
(5) you back away from the speakers, bumping into Unit 37 with a dull clang. You realize that the speakers are now clogged with slime and float forward to suck the slime out of hte holes. When you do, the Speakers make a loud sound like the long inhale of a breath, then cough several times loudly. "I'm good, I'm -cough - ... gimme a se- cough a seco -cough- w-wait ... -cough cough- Okay, okay that's better. ugh, I gotta brush my teeth, that's just nasty. Bleagh." (see Pancaek's turn for the continuation here)
Name: Zygomuc
Species: Space fungus
Description: A blob of gray and purple Mold, having achieved sufficient mass to become ambulatory and predatory.
Preferred Gravity: Low
Preferred atmosphere: Pressurized, no composition preference
Previous occupation:Blob of mold
Miscellaneous: It's a colony of space mold, what you not get?
Rise from the grime and try to find why the atmosphere is getting thin.
(6) You rise from the mold and are immediately sucked into an atmospheric scrubber. Fortunately for your immediate survival, the scrubber is not operational. This is also a clue as to why the air is getting thin. The place is in such disrepair that the mold is gaining sentience.
See if I can help get the speakers back in working order. If unscuccesful try to locate a different set of speakers to reroute the ship AI to.
If speakers are a no-go, ask the AI if it can't just project text instead of projecting its body. If not for some reason, find a screen for the AI to connect to so it can use text to communicate instead.
Name: Sanitation And Maintenance Unit 37
Species: Roomba with extreme upgrades
Description: Unit 37 started out as a simple, circular roomba for the workspace of a certain scientist. Said scientist amused himself with upgrading unit 37 piece by piece, to enable it to take on more cleaning duties, and eventually general maintance as well. Now it looks like a bulky humanoid industrial frame, wearing a grey boilersuit with SANITATION in bold letters. It's only distinguising traits from your run of the mill industrial cleaning bot is that it has one flexible, extendible tentacle attached to the back (to clean those hard to reach spots) and that its head is a a recased Roomba with one big glowing camera for an eye. The tentacle has three gripper claws and an nozzle to dispense cleaning fluid.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Anything non-corrosive (and clean)
Previous occupation: Maintenance and sanitation bot, Roomba (formerly)
Miscellaneous: Has somehow picked up a rather dainty apron somewhere that it has been wearing while on the ship. It's a dainty shade of light purple and says "Chortle, Cherish, Clean".
(1) you produce a brushing utensil and thrust it into the speaker holes. the AI makes several choking and gurgling noises. The hologram froths at the mouth. While cleaning one of the speaker holes, you hear a loud POP, followed by a dull buzzing. A short tingle runs up your brush attachment and the smell of burnt electronics puffs into the room.
When the AI speaks again, its voice is rusty and rough, accompanied by the dull buzz of a broken speaker: "EEK! What are you doing? Not so rough. I think you chipped a tooth. Computer, make an appointment with my dentist. Thursday's no good. Next Tuesday? aww. I guess I can hold out until then." You recieve a notification chime on your communication suite. apparently, you have a dental appointment on Tuesday. "Now then. Welcome to the meeting everyone. Our first order of business is to introduce ourselves. It's important for the officers to have good communi-" The hologram looks around the room, then swings it's arms down and stamps its foot, sending an improbable gust of dust floating through the air. "H-hey! Where is everyone? You're all late! This is terrible!"
Continue to search for plasma torch/thrower in engineering.
(5) you manage to locate an engineering section. The door is even open enough to squeeze through.It's pretty dark in here though. You can't see enough to tell a plasma arc thrower from a neutronium rod disosolver.
Hunt/Wait for mice for a while. If that doesn't pan out, then go watch one of the other crewmates, maybe they have food or something to play with.
Name: Mr. Koff (pronounced "cough")
Species: Cat
Description: An adult, slightly chubby, short-haired grey cat with green eyes. Has a hoarse, grouchy meow.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen
Previous occupation: Chief Mouser
Miscellaneous: Humans still take cats with them in their long voyages for company and pest control, though the pests they chase are somewhat more troublesome. This one stuck his head somewhere he wasn't supposed to and ended up here.
(5) you do indeed catch a few mice. Well, that's one crewperson fed. As for followingthe others -well, you'll have to be morespecific, since, you know, they're aalmost all in diffferent places by now.
In The area around the conference room, emergency lighting and klaxons have been triggered. a few of you are outside the area of the alarm and are still blind, but most of you now have sufficient light no navigate by.Also the alarms are annoyingly loud.
Life Support: UNKNOWN. Oxygen seems okayish, if a bit thin
Engines: UNKNOWN. presumed functional, as gravity works.
Gravity: currently functional. you stick to the floor, somehow.
Life Support: UNKNOWN
Navigation: Functional.
Communications: UNKNOWN
Sensors: UNKNOWN
Weaponry: UNKNOWN
A.I: irritable. snarky.
Medical: UNKNOWN
crew quarters: UNKNOWN
Cargo: UNKNOWN
Captain: UNFILLED
Vice Captain: UNFILLED
First Officer: UNFILLED
Chief of Medicine: UNFILLED
Quartermaster: UNFILLED
Master Engineer: UNFILLED
Navigator: David Freeman. Currently in the guise of a large crab.
Janitor: UNFILLED
Financial Officer: UNFILLED
Communications Officer: UNFILLED
Sensor Tech: UNFILLED
Ship's Dentist: Unit 37
Other: UNSPECIFIED
clearly the issue is that there is a leak in the air scrubber. Try to find some debris to plug the hole That I am being pulled to. Zygomuc hates leaks.
Name: Zygomuc
Species: Space fungus
Description: A blob of gray and purple Mold, having achieved sufficient mass to become ambulatory and predatory.
Preferred Gravity: Low
Preferred atmosphere: Pressurized, no composition preference
Previous occupation:Blob of mold
Miscellaneous: It's a colony of space mold, what you not get?
Edit: Life support is listed twice in the spoilers.
"Okay so technically I'm suffocating to death but maybe I can just REAL QUICK grab a bite to eat."
Try to jimmy loose that shrimp casserole sandwich, then scurry into the vents and wriggle through it until I hit life support. If I'm too bulky to fit in the vents, backtrack on foot looking for life support.
Name: Sirirx
Species: Vetan
Turns of Ammonia Left: (4)
Description: An old-timey space suit filled with eternally writhing eels.
Preferred Gravity: High
Preferred atmosphere: Ammonia
Previous occupation: Marrow Farmer
Miscellaneous: These crewmates look kinda tasty...
"What the hell would you do with that much lard?"
Follow the smoke and see where it's coming from.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Inventory:
Phone
Rosomio gives a half sleepy smile, " ¡Buenísimo! Guess that solve the light problem."
Rosomio tries to make out his surroundings.
Name: Rosomio
Species: Space Human
Description:He is a tall skinny human, around 6'5. His skin is gray and has a habit of slouching around. He is a timid fellow and always have a negative view on everything. His long hair is black and unkempt, and his eyes are droopy. He was born in a space station settlement that was once owned by the short lived Iberian Empire. Rosomio has a heavy Iberian accent, and has a monotone voice.
Preferred Gravity:Low
Preferred atmosphere:Oxygen
Previous occupation:Botanist
Miscellaneous:He's really good at sneaking around without people noticing him. He was also taught how to shoot a gun to defend against space raiders back home.
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
”No no, that’s quite alright. Just keep a steady orbit around this planet until further notice.”
Make my way back to the conference room with the choking hologram to see if they made any progress yet
Get a dead mouse's remains and bring them to that eel suit (or to the conference room, if I can't find the suit). Present the mouse and meow until someone pays attention to me.
Name: Mr. Koff (pronounced "cough")
Species: Cat
Description: An adult, slightly chubby, short-haired grey cat with green eyes. Has a hoarse, grouchy meow.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen
Previous occupation: Chief Mouser
Miscellaneous: Humans still take cats with them in their long voyages for company and pest control, though the pests they chase are somewhat more troublesome. This one stuck his head somewhere he wasn't supposed to and ended up here.
"Do not worry, friend computer, most of the crew have already introduced themselves to eachother while you were in disrepair and are now taking actions of their own volition! I am Unit 37, cleaning, maintenance and ERROR, INSUFFICIENT USER PRIVILIGES robot! As a green level user, you may assign me practically any cleaning and/or maintanance task that you wish! Is there anything I can do for you right now?"
Converse with the ship AI a bit.
If it assigns me a cleaning and/or maintenance task, go and do that to the best of my abilities.
If it does not assign me a task, go search the ship for the maintenance section. Surely a ship such as this must have a bunch of maintenance and/or cleaning gear laying about?
Name: Sanitation And Maintenance Unit 37
Species: Roomba with extreme upgrades
Description: Unit 37 started out as a simple, circular roomba for the workspace of a certain scientist. Said scientist amused himself with upgrading unit 37 piece by piece, to enable it to take on more cleaning duties, and eventually general maintance as well. Now it looks like a bulky humanoid industrial frame, wearing a grey boilersuit with SANITATION in bold letters. It's only distinguising traits from your run of the mill industrial cleaning bot is that it has one flexible, extendible tentacle attached to the back (to clean those hard to reach spots) and that its head is a a recased Roomba with one big glowing camera for an eye. The tentacle has three gripper claws and an nozzle to dispense cleaning fluid.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Anything non-corrosive (and clean)
Previous occupation: Maintenance and sanitation bot, Roomba (formerly)
Miscellaneous: Has somehow picked up a rather dainty apron somewhere that it has been wearing while on the ship. It's a dainty shade of light purple and says "Chortle, Cherish, Clean".
"Yes yes, nice protein factory. Not now, must find a way to avoid suffocation."
Pet the yowling butthole and try to find an engineering section or the like. If there's no formal place to pump ammonia into the vents, I'll have to make do with synthesizing or harvesting it from somewhere else in the ship.
Take kitty and its prize with me, of course.
Name: Sirirx
Species: Vetan
Turns of Ammonia Left: (3)
Description: An old-timey space suit filled with eternally writhing eels.
Preferred Gravity: High
Preferred atmosphere: Ammonia
Previous occupation: Marrow Farmer
Miscellaneous: These crewmates look kinda tasty...
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
”Ah, good, you’re talking now, shiny translucent projection. You might be somewhat happy to know that I have managed to get the navigation up and running. However, I have to admit I think this place is generally dull and nasty. Perhaps you have some knowledge of the issue?”
Speak with the hologram, indirectly asking for a task
"Oh god I'm gonna die here."
Try to find a way to ether unplug or turn off the smoking and sparking things.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Inventory:
Phone
Be the parrot-cat! Shoulder is the best place to perch. I'm sure that will upgrade the bundle of eels to the rank of captain.
However, if I do smell the scent of urine (i.e. ammonia), go investigate, especially if it is unnaturally strong. And meow for the eel thing to follow me. For it's scent to be that strong it must be some gigantic rat. ((Perhaps a bit flimsy justification, but if we find some tank of ammonia it might keep Irony and the rest of our ammonia breathers from suffocating.))
Name: Mr. Koff (pronounced "cough")
Species: Cat
Description: An adult, slightly chubby, short-haired grey cat with green eyes. Has a hoarse, grouchy meow.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen
Previous occupation: Chief Mouser
Miscellaneous: Humans still take cats with them in their long voyages for company and pest control, though the pests they chase are somewhat more troublesome. This one stuck his head somewhere he wasn't supposed to and ended up here.
"Excellent, thank you for your tasks, green level user!
I am unsure wether this apron comes in other colours, because I may or may not have picked it up off of a corpse some time in the past!"
Start doing the tasks Friend Computer gave me. Just go top to bottom, because surely Friend Computer has already sorted them by importance!
Name: Sanitation And Maintenance Unit 37
Species: Roomba with extreme upgrades
Description: Unit 37 started out as a simple, circular roomba for the workspace of a certain scientist. Said scientist amused himself with upgrading unit 37 piece by piece, to enable it to take on more cleaning duties, and eventually general maintance as well. Now it looks like a bulky humanoid industrial frame, wearing a grey boilersuit with SANITATION in bold letters. It's only distinguising traits from your run of the mill industrial cleaning bot is that it has one flexible, extendible tentacle attached to the back (to clean those hard to reach spots) and that its head is a a recased Roomba with one big glowing camera for an eye. The tentacle has three gripper claws and an nozzle to dispense cleaning fluid.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Anything non-corrosive (and clean)
Previous occupation: Maintenance and sanitation bot, Roomba (formerly)
Miscellaneous: Has somehow picked up a rather dainty apron somewhere that it has been wearing while on the ship. It's a dainty shade of light purple and says "Chortle, Cherish, Clean".
This is the engineering section right? Why is there nothing here?
Go and try the kitchen next I guess.
(4) you stumble your way through the dark for a while until you discover a kitchenette, complete with microwave and mini-fridge. The sink is full of dirty dishes and roaches. The room is lit only by the small light mounted under the microwave.
this calls for celebration for preventing everything from being sucked out into the void! Zygomuc goes to find something organic to sink their mycelium into for nutrients and mass.
(3) you find some mold, some old insect chitin, and a suspicious glob of slime. The slime at least is edible, apparently.
Crewbot
Find a place with lots of chemicals, and mix some together hopefully producing ammonia
(2) You wander around for a while without a clue what you are looking for. You don't find it. After some blind flailing in the dark, you stumble back into the light, none the wiser., nor any more ammoniated than you were before. You wonder if there might be a better way. Surely these space vessels had contingencies for this kind of thing. if only there were someone who might know.
"Yes yes, nice protein factory. Not now, must find a way to avoid suffocation."
Pet the yowling butthole and try to find an engineering section or the like. If there's no formal place to pump ammonia into the vents, I'll have to make do with synthesizing or harvesting it from somewhere else in the ship.
Take kitty and its prize with me, of course.
Name: Sirirx
Species: Vetan
Turns of Ammonia Left: (3)
Description: An old-timey space suit filled with eternally writhing eels.
Preferred Gravity: High
Preferred atmosphere: Ammonia
Previous occupation: Marrow Farmer
Miscellaneous: These crewmates look kinda tasty...
(2) The path to engineering disappears into the darkness. After some blind flailing in the dark, you stumble back into the light, none the wiser., nor any more ammoniated than you were before. You wonder if there might be a better way. Surely these space vessels had contingencies for this kind of thing. if only there were someone who might know.
Knowledge check:
Rosomio growing up in a space station gives him a general knowledge on how a space station should work. Rosomio will try to identify which of the doors in around him leads to power generator and try to get the power up and running again.
(2) Rosomio knows that the power supply for the ship lies in it's complex gravitational drive system, and that if the power supply is off, the gravity also would be off, and everyone would be dead - not just on the ship, but in a 10,000 kilometer radius around the point of failure. Knowing this, Rosomio encounters a mystery: why, if the power is functional, are all the blasted lights out?
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
”Ah, good, you’re talking now, shiny translucent projection. You might be somewhat happy to know that I have managed to get the navigation up and running. However, I have to admit I think this place is generally dull and nasty. Perhaps you have some knowledge of the issue?”
Speak with the hologram, indirectly asking for a task
"Navigation? Fantastic! Wonderful! Now we can finally sell all this cargo. We're dreadfully late. late indeed. But I am sure the nascent harvest worlds of the Omi cluster won't mind if our wares are a little on the dirty side. They need these to survive the colonization process, after all!"
The A.I. beams at her brilliance, then blinks at you. "What's this about dirt? Well, you can hardly blame me, now can you? I don't even have hands, How would I weild a mop?" (2) the A.I. seems to have missed your hint about a task.
"Oh god I'm gonna die here."
Try to find a way to ether unplug or turn off the smoking and sparking things.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Inventory:
Phone
(6) You grab the panel covering the sparking wiring and are immediately blown across the hall into the other alcove, unconscious. You aren't aware ofit, but this apparently trips a breaker or blows a fuse and the whole workstation goes dark. Smoke still rises lazily, but it is dying out without a source.
Your alcove alights, however, fully and brightly, not that you can see that. Another hologram appears. this one is a lab coat wearing a stethoscope and carrying a very large hypodermic needle. "Greetings. Please state the nature of your visit to the AID station. For your convenienecf while you wait, a nurse will be by momentarily to administer some hallucinogenics."
Be the parrot-cat! Shoulder is the best place to perch. I'm sure that will upgrade the bundle of eels to the rank of captain.
However, if I do smell the scent of urine (i.e. ammonia), go investigate, especially if it is unnaturally strong. And meow for the eel thing to follow me. For it's scent to be that strong it must be some gigantic rat. ((Perhaps a bit flimsy justification, but if we find some tank of ammonia it might keep Irony and the rest of our ammonia breathers from suffocating.))
Name: Mr. Koff (pronounced "cough")
Species: Cat
Description: An adult, slightly chubby, short-haired grey cat with green eyes. Has a hoarse, grouchy meow.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen
Previous occupation: Chief Mouser
Miscellaneous: Humans still take cats with them in their long voyages for company and pest control, though the pests they chase are somewhat more troublesome. This one stuck his head somewhere he wasn't supposed to and ended up here.
(4) you perch on the eelsuit's shoulder. "Welcome aboard, Captain Andre. your dry cleaning is in your cabin. A tin of tuna has been prepared for Mr. Big Boi. Please consult your secretary for your schedule and state of the ship review." (2) sadly, Chief of Staff Big Boi doesn't find anything to save our poor ammoniates from their imminent asphyxiation. If only there were some standard delivery system for space suit atmosphere, located in convenient dispenser systems throughout the ship, brightly colored yellow with dedicated sockets for ammonia ports. If only. Not that you care. You are just disappointed that you cannot hunt the legendary Really Big And Mean Rat. Curse you, Really Big And Mean Rat, for your absence. Curse yooooooouuuuuuu!
"Excellent, thank you for your tasks, green level user!
I am unsure wether this apron comes in other colours, because I may or may not have picked it up off of a corpse some time in the past!"
Start doing the tasks Friend Computer gave me. Just go top to bottom, because surely Friend Computer has already sorted them by importance!
Name: Sanitation And Maintenance Unit 37
Species: Roomba with extreme upgrades
Description: Unit 37 started out as a simple, circular roomba for the workspace of a certain scientist. Said scientist amused himself with upgrading unit 37 piece by piece, to enable it to take on more cleaning duties, and eventually general maintance as well. Now it looks like a bulky humanoid industrial frame, wearing a grey boilersuit with SANITATION in bold letters. It's only distinguising traits from your run of the mill industrial cleaning bot is that it has one flexible, extendible tentacle attached to the back (to clean those hard to reach spots) and that its head is a a recased Roomba with one big glowing camera for an eye. The tentacle has three gripper claws and an nozzle to dispense cleaning fluid.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Anything non-corrosive (and clean)
Previous occupation: Maintenance and sanitation bot, Roomba (formerly)
Miscellaneous: Has somehow picked up a rather dainty apron somewhere that it has been wearing while on the ship. It's a dainty shade of light purple and says "Chortle, Cherish, Clean".
(1) task one is to give a progress report to the quartermaster. You query the system for the name and location of the quartermaster and receive a FILE NOT FOUND error.
Life Support: UNKNOWN. Oxygen seems okayish, if a bit thin
Engines: UNKNOWN. presumed functional, as gravity works. Also, power is functional, because if it weren't you and about half the planet you are allegedly orbiting would be vapor
Gravity: currently functional. you stick to the floor, somehow.
Life Support: UNKNOWN
Navigation: Functional.
Communications: UNKNOWN
Sensors: UNKNOWN
Weaponry: UNKNOWN
A.I: irritable. snarky.
Medical: UNKNOWN
crew quarters: UNKNOWN
Cargo: UNKNOWN
Captain: Sirix "Andre" 3000. Eelsuit
Vice Captain/Chief of Staff: Mr. "Big Boi" Koff. Cat
First Officer: UNFILLED
Chief of Medicine: UNFILLED
Quartermaster: UNFILLED
Master Engineer: UNFILLED
Navigator: "David Freeman." Currently in the guise of Tamatoa, a large crab.
Janitor: UNFILLED
Financial Officer: UNFILLED
Communications Officer: UNFILLED
Sensor Tech: UNFILLED
Ship's Dentist: Unit 37
Other: UNSPECIFIED
[/quote]
"I'm not suffocating, you're suffocating!" Sirirx insists to nobody in particular.
Try to access the ship's AI to find ammonia sources. Munch on my delicious mold-shrimp-casserole sandwich on the way there. Give kitty some when he inevitably demands it even though he's not going to eat it.
Name: Sirirx
Species: Vetan
Turns of Ammonia Left: (2)
Description: An old-timey space suit filled with eternally writhing eels.
Preferred Gravity: High
Preferred atmosphere: Ammonia
Previous occupation: Marrow Farmer
Miscellaneous: These crewmates look kinda tasty...
Try to regain consciousness.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Inventory:
Phone
Between the red flashing light, Rosomio will try to make out any light source mounted on the wall. He will then go up to it and try to inspect what's wrong with it. If he can't reach it. Then he'll go to the janitor's room and try to find a stepladder. While there, He'll see if there's any light replacement device or light bulb charger around and bring it to the light source to fix it.
Name: Rosomio
Species: Space Human
Description:He is a tall skinny human, around 6'5. His skin is gray and has a habit of slouching around. He is a timid fellow and always have a negative view on everything. His long hair is black and unkempt, and his eyes are droopy. He was born in a space station settlement that was once owned by the short lived Iberian Empire. Rosomio has a heavy Iberian accent, and has a monotone voice.
Preferred Gravity:Low
Preferred atmosphere:Oxygen
Previous occupation:Botanist
Miscellaneous:He's really good at sneaking around without people noticing him. He was also taught how to shoot a gun to defend against space raiders back home.
”Okay, let me rephrase that. This place is disgusting and I want to clean it up so it can be shiny. And while that’s going I could also probably turn the ship toward the Omi cluster so we can sell your cargo.”
Directly try to obtain a task from the hologram this time
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
"ERROR: Unable to complete task one due to employee failure to present.
On to task 2!"
Can't be helped if fleshy employees fail to do their part of the job, on to task 2! Also scan the list to see if there's anything on there that seems like a priority/important task.
Name: Sanitation And Maintenance Unit 37
Species: Roomba with extreme upgrades
Description: Unit 37 started out as a simple, circular roomba for the workspace of a certain scientist. Said scientist amused himself with upgrading unit 37 piece by piece, to enable it to take on more cleaning duties, and eventually general maintance as well. Now it looks like a bulky humanoid industrial frame, wearing a grey boilersuit with SANITATION in bold letters. It's only distinguising traits from your run of the mill industrial cleaning bot is that it has one flexible, extendible tentacle attached to the back (to clean those hard to reach spots) and that its head is a a recased Roomba with one big glowing camera for an eye. The tentacle has three gripper claws and an nozzle to dispense cleaning fluid.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Anything non-corrosive (and clean)
Previous occupation: Maintenance and sanitation bot, Roomba (formerly)
Miscellaneous: Has somehow picked up a rather dainty apron somewhere that it has been wearing while on the ship. It's a dainty shade of light purple and says "Chortle, Cherish, Clean".
((Heh. Watch Sirix suffocate to death and we end up with a cat as the captain.))
"Mow!" Koff complains and bats on Sirix's hand until he can properly smell its contents. Seeing that it's nothing too interesting, he lets it go.
"Maaao?" he states his desire demand to play with something to the hologram and the rest of the room from his perch on the eel-suited captain (pun intended). He was hoping the eel-suit would had gotten the mouse moving again, but that hadn't worked out.
Name: Mr. Koff (pronounced "cough") / "Big Boi"
Rank: Vice Captain/Chief of Staff
Species: Cat
Description: An adult, slightly chubby, short-haired grey cat with green eyes. Has a hoarse, grouchy meow.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen
Previous occupation: Chief Mouser
Miscellaneous: Humans still take cats with them in their long voyages for company and pest control, though the pests they chase are somewhat more troublesome. This one stuck his head somewhere he wasn't supposed to and ended up here.
Look for the nearest surface to carve.
Name: Bubbles
Rank: Chaplain
Species: Harvester
Description: A robot shaped like a centipede, with blades, surgical, and masonry tools replacing the first three pairs of legs. Its 'antennae' have been replaced by a pair of bubble cameras.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Any non- corrosive (though organic particulate is appreciated.)
Previous occupation: Flesh Logger, (briefly) Cargo
Miscellaneous:
Was salvage payment from few jobs back. Eventually became Chaplain during a fad of "religious accessibility". The engravings on the chapel walls grow by one inch every year, in the direction of the hydroponics bay.
[/quote]
"I'm not suffocating, you're suffocating!" Sirirx insists to nobody in particular.
Try to access the ship's AI to find ammonia sources. Munch on my delicious mold-shrimp-casserole sandwich on the way there. Give kitty some when he inevitably demands it even though he's not going to eat it.
Name: Sirirx
Species: Vetan
Turns of Ammonia Left: (2)
Description: An old-timey space suit filled with eternally writhing eels.
Preferred Gravity: High
Preferred atmosphere: Ammonia
Previous occupation: Marrow Farmer
Miscellaneous: These crewmates look kinda tasty...
(4) "Non-standard atmosphere is distributed through the atmospheric resupply tubes located in each sector of the ship. the access ports for ammonia are marked and highlighted in yellow. You may need to clean the port surfaces to locate the markings. You will find an access port two doors down from the conference room. Please seal the door of hte atmosphere kiosk behind you while recharging, to prevent accidental leaks into the main atmospheric environment. thank you for your cooperation. Your charges will be deducted automatically from your pay." While discussing this with the AI, you aqcuire an additional mold colony on your space suit leg. it seems to take offense to the flora already hitching a ride there. That, or maybe they are mating. Who knows, really.
Try to regain consciousness.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Inventory:
Phone
(1) no. hmm. You are dying. Hopefully someone finds you before you do.
Try and find a plasma/flamethrower here.
in the kitchenette? (6) You look at the microwave for a solid three minutes before deciding it probably won't be easy to convert to whatever it is you are trying to get. You root around in the cabinets and pull out some aerosol cans and a pack of matches. You light a match, hold it in front of the can, wince, and spray. After a few false starts, you manageto get a steady stream of fire. You also catch your hand on fire from the build up of whatever was in the aerosol canister. You scorch the woodwork of the cabinet, but it doesn't incinerate.
Between the red flashing light, Rosomio will try to make out any light source mounted on the wall. He will then go up to it and try to inspect what's wrong with it. If he can't reach it. Then he'll go to the janitor's room and try to find a stepladder. While there, He'll see if there's any light replacement device or light bulb charger around and bring it to the light source to fix it.
Name: Rosomio
Species: Space Human
Description:He is a tall skinny human, around 6'5. His skin is gray and has a habit of slouching around. He is a timid fellow and always have a negative view on everything. His long hair is black and unkempt, and his eyes are droopy. He was born in a space station settlement that was once owned by the short lived Iberian Empire. Rosomio has a heavy Iberian accent, and has a monotone voice.
Preferred Gravity:Low
Preferred atmosphere:Oxygen
Previous occupation:Botanist
Miscellaneous:He's really good at sneaking around without people noticing him. He was also taught how to shoot a gun to defend against space raiders back home.
(5) You begin inspecting the light elements. You fiddle with some panels, poke about along hte wall and ceiling, and press a few buttons. You activate a screen of some kind, but the glow is dull, black, and covered in slime. Another button activates the AI. this hologram is faded and dark green, as if seen through an algae infested swamp. "For thousands of years, I have slumbered. Who dares awak- oh, it's you. What do you want?" [color]"trying to fix the lights"[/color] you mutter, in whatever color you speak in. "I will activate the lights, for a terrible price" the ominous spectre intones. AS she speaks, the lights in the room come on, and the emergency light blinks out. "You must bring me five sapients, and wire them into the engine transmutation core. Then, you must trace the sigils in salt onto the corrupted processor, intone the spell, and offer a fresh soul to the CPU. Only then will I be freed of my curse and will be able to activate the lights for you." By now, the lights in the hallway are on, and you hear the sounds of a couple of the other crew commenting about being able to see again.
Zygomuc eats the slime, but still hungers for something more substantial. Didn't my mold-hairs detect vibrations of some other creatures yelping and breathing and stomping about? Go find and try to eat one of them.
(6) you go and find a walking space suit with a cat and a dead mouse on it's head. You attach yourself to the space suit's leg. A mushroom takes offense and begins waging biological warfare with you. The two of you angrily spore at each other, locked in coprophagous combat.
”Okay, let me rephrase that. This place is disgusting and I want to clean it up so it can be shiny. And while that’s going I could also probably turn the ship toward the Omi cluster so we can sell your cargo.”
Directly try to obtain a task from the hologram this time
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
(5) "the medbay is terribly unhygenic, and would be an excellent place to start cleaning. You will find the medbay a floor down and six doors along the hall, on the left. it appears that one of the first aid kiosks alongthat hall have a visitor. perhaps you could enlist that visitor in your efforts? make sure she finishes filling out all the necessary paperwork for her treatment before hand. She seems terribly uncooperateive, lying there in a pool of her own blood and surrounded by scorch marks like that1 the nerve of some people."
Task get: clean the medbay. enlist the unconscious to assist.
Crewbot
Find my way to the AI and ask her about where ammonia is stored
You join Captain Sirix in listening to the AI explain the atmospheric dispensers, followed by an in flight safety lecture, and a detailed description of the in flight snack schedule and the precise volume of carbonated beverages available per passenger in coach and business classes.
"ERROR: Unable to complete task one due to employee failure to present.
On to task 2!"
Can't be helped if fleshy employees fail to do their part of the job, on to task 2! Also scan the list to see if there's anything on there that seems like a priority/important task.
Name: Sanitation And Maintenance Unit 37
Species: Roomba with extreme upgrades
Description: Unit 37 started out as a simple, circular roomba for the workspace of a certain scientist. Said scientist amused himself with upgrading unit 37 piece by piece, to enable it to take on more cleaning duties, and eventually general maintance as well. Now it looks like a bulky humanoid industrial frame, wearing a grey boilersuit with SANITATION in bold letters. It's only distinguising traits from your run of the mill industrial cleaning bot is that it has one flexible, extendible tentacle attached to the back (to clean those hard to reach spots) and that its head is a a recased Roomba with one big glowing camera for an eye. The tentacle has three gripper claws and an nozzle to dispense cleaning fluid.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Anything non-corrosive (and clean)
Previous occupation: Maintenance and sanitation bot, Roomba (formerly)
Miscellaneous: Has somehow picked up a rather dainty apron somewhere that it has been wearing while on the ship. It's a dainty shade of light purple and says "Chortle, Cherish, Clean".
(1) task two has an attachment, which, when opened, downloads the Baby Shark song into your Roomba. Good luck getting that back out of your robotic head. (3) you scan the list for priority assignments. Nothing seems to stand out beyond the basic: repairs to various subsystems, purchase of snacks and fuel, filtering incoming calls to crewpersons, and answering insurance billing questions. You notice two tasks that seem perhaps more interesting than the others (except the cleaning duties, of course): fill out the crew roster, beginning with teh officer information chart, and check the primary ship systems, activating the ones that need it, and verifying the status of each. Might be good to do after bleaching the bedsheets, or synthesizing the widow cleaner, or stirring the waste treatment vats (making sure to hydrate soem space worms to help with the eco-friendly waste processing.)
((Heh. Watch Sirix suffocate to death and we end up with a cat as the captain.))
"Mow!" Koff complains and bats on Sirix's hand until he can properly smell its contents. Seeing that it's nothing too interesting, he lets it go.
"Maaao?" he states his desire demand to play with something to the hologram and the rest of the room from his perch on the eel-suited captain (pun intended). He was hoping the eel-suit would had gotten the mouse moving again, but that hadn't worked out.
Name: Mr. Koff (pronounced "cough") / "Big Boi"
Rank: Vice Captain/Chief of Staff
Species: Cat
Description: An adult, slightly chubby, short-haired grey cat with green eyes. Has a hoarse, grouchy meow.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen
Previous occupation: Chief Mouser
Miscellaneous: Humans still take cats with them in their long voyages for company and pest control, though the pests they chase are somewhat more troublesome. This one stuck his head somewhere he wasn't supposed to and ended up here.
(6) ERROR. VIOLENCE WILL BE MET WITH EQUAL FORCE. LEVEL TWO SUPPRESSION ENGAGED. a turret appears from the ceiling and swivels around a moment before stopping, beeping six times, and turning on a laser of some kind. A bright red spot illuminates the wall opposite you before beginning to swivel in your direction. Red dots are fun, right?
Look for the nearest surface to carve.
Name: Bubbles
Rank: Chaplain
Species: Harvester
Description: A robot shaped like a centipede, with blades, surgical, and masonry tools replacing the first three pairs of legs. Its 'antennae' have been replaced by a pair of bubble cameras.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Any non- corrosive (though organic particulate is appreciated.)
Previous occupation: Flesh Logger, (briefly) Cargo
Miscellaneous:
Was salvage payment from few jobs back. Eventually became Chaplain during a fad of "religious accessibility". The engravings on the chapel walls grow by one inch every year, in the direction of the hydroponics bay.
Chaplain, eh? Alright, Chaplain it is. (2) every wall in the recharging port you are attached to is covered in etchings.
Lights have been activated. Everyone is now able to see, more or less. assuming you have visual processors of some kind. Currently, four of you are together near one of hte atmospheric ports: the eelsuit, the cat, the mold and the drone. Everyone else is still roughly scattered about the sector, but within a hundred meters or so of each other. Currently we have two injured, not that anyone else is aware of that fact. Looks like the captain and the drone will be able to start breathing (or whatever it is they do with the atmosphere) next turn, assuming the ammonia ports are functioning and there is a supply of ammonia on the ship (there probably is)
Life Support: UNKNOWN. Oxygen seems okayish, if a bit thin
Engines: UNKNOWN. presumed functional, as gravity works. Also, power is functional, because if it weren't you and about half the planet you are allegedly orbiting would be vapor
Gravity: currently functional. you stick to the floor, somehow.
Life Support: UNKNOWN
Navigation: Functional.
Communications: UNKNOWN
Sensors: UNKNOWN
Weaponry: UNKNOWN
A.I: irritable. snarky.
Medical: UNKNOWN
crew quarters: UNKNOWN
Cargo: UNKNOWN
Captain: Sirix "Andre" 3000. Eelsuit
Vice Captain/Chief of Staff: Mr. "Big Boi" Koff. Cat
First Officer: UNFILLED
Chief of Medicine: UNFILLED
Quartermaster: UNFILLED
Master Engineer: UNFILLED
Navigator: "David Freeman." Currently in the guise of Tamatoa, a large crab.
Janitor: UNFILLED
Financial Officer: UNFILLED
Communications Officer: UNFILLED
Sensor Tech: UNFILLED
Ship's Dentist: Unit 37
Chaplain: Bubbles
Other: UNSPECIFIED
Try to stop dying or at least wake up to do something about my dying.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Inventory:
Phone
"Precious ammonia!"
Get to those ammonia ports and breathe deep!
Name: Sirirx
Species: Vetan
Turns of Ammonia Left: (!!1!!)
Description: An old-timey space suit filled with eternally writhing eels.
Preferred Gravity: High
Preferred atmosphere: Ammonia
Previous occupation: Marrow Farmer
Miscellaneous: These crewmates look kinda tasty...
Red dot! My mortal enemy! We meet again at last! You may have eluded me all those times before, but this time it will be different! This is the time I will finally catch you and consume you, the day I shall taste your glowy flesh! Charge! Catch the red dot! Kill kill kill! This is the moment I've dreamed about! (https://xkcd.com/729/)
Name: Mr. Koff (pronounced "cough") / "Big Boi"
Rank: Vice Captain/Chief of Staff
Species: Cat
Description: An adult, slightly chubby, short-haired grey cat with green eyes. Has a hoarse, grouchy meow.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen
Previous occupation: Chief Mouser
Miscellaneous: Humans still take cats with them in their long voyages for company and pest control, though the pests they chase are somewhat more troublesome. This one stuck his head somewhere he wasn't supposed to and ended up here.
Travel to the medbay and search for the crew mate allegedly in a first aid kiosk in that area
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
"Baby Shark.FLAC detected. Oh. Oh no. It's stuck on infinite loop..."
Unit-37 goes completely still
"Initiating emergency debugging mode"
Reboot into emergency safe/debug mode and attempt to purge the baby shark song.
If succesful, go and find the primary ship systems and enable those that seem to require enabling.
If unsuccesful, scream while attempting a full factory reset.
Name: Sanitation And Maintenance Unit 37
Species: Roomba with extreme upgrades
Description: Unit 37 started out as a simple, circular roomba for the workspace of a certain scientist. Said scientist amused himself with upgrading unit 37 piece by piece, to enable it to take on more cleaning duties, and eventually general maintance as well. Now it looks like a bulky humanoid industrial frame, wearing a grey boilersuit with SANITATION in bold letters. It's only distinguising traits from your run of the mill industrial cleaning bot is that it has one flexible, extendible tentacle attached to the back (to clean those hard to reach spots) and that its head is a a recased Roomba with one big glowing camera for an eye. The tentacle has three gripper claws and an nozzle to dispense cleaning fluid.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Anything non-corrosive (and clean)
Previous occupation: Maintenance and sanitation bot, Roomba (formerly)
Miscellaneous: Has somehow picked up a rather dainty apron somewhere that it has been wearing while on the ship. It's a dainty shade of light purple and says "Chortle, Cherish, Clean".
Examine my surroundings for any crew, alive or dead. If none can be found, attempt to seek out the chief of staff. He has a way of bending Loggerheads to his will.
Name: Bubbles
Rank: Chaplain
Species: Harvester
Description: A robot shaped like a centipede, with blades, surgical, and masonry tools replacing the first three pairs of legs. Its 'antennae' have been replaced by a pair of bubble cameras.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Any non- corrosive (though organic particulate is appreciated.)
Previous occupation: Flesh Logger, (briefly) Cargo
Miscellaneous:
Was salvage payment from few jobs back. Eventually became Chaplain during a fad of "religious accessibility". The engravings on the chapel walls grow by one inch every year, in the direction of the hydroponics bay.
Try to stop dying or at least wake up to do something about my dying.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Inventory:
Phone
(3) The afterlife you have contacted is experiencing technical difficulties. Please hold for the next available representative. Estimated wait time, 31, 353 hours 34 minutes 16 seconds. Your time is important to us. Please hold for the next available representative. You wake up at the end of this turn with your head completely wrapped in guaze and slathered in ointment. Something is broken, but bound, and you are disoriented as fuck and feel like vomitting, but suspect that doing so would not end well for you in your current state. You paw at your face, only to find that both your hands are similarly ointmented and bound.
"Precious ammonia!"
Get to those ammonia ports and breathe deep!
Name: Sirirx
Species: Vetan
Turns of Ammonia Left: (!!1!!)
Description: An old-timey space suit filled with eternally writhing eels.
Preferred Gravity: High
Preferred atmosphere: Ammonia
Previous occupation: Marrow Farmer
Miscellaneous: These crewmates look kinda tasty...
"Precious ammonia!"
Get to those ammonia ports and breathe deep!
follow Srirx to find and breathe ammonia
(1)The two of you scramble into the atmospherics booth in a comic, two stooges style pushing match. You refill on ammonia. The scent of Generic Pine Flavored Cleaning Disinfectant and Industrial SolventTM fills your inhalatory ports. It stings. Well, it's better than asphyxiation, I suppose. You attempt to tur nto unlock the air booth only ot find that you are jammed tightly. You can't even reach the door panel to order the release.
Zygomuc begins an advance on the dead mouse and cat at the top of the spacesuit, being mindful not to let their Basidiomycotanian rival's spores take root on them or their meal(s) first.
(4) the cat disaappears from the spacesuit long before you make any progress. The dead mouse remains smeared across the suit's faceport though, dripping some delicious nectars onto your filaments occasionally, which you manage to get the bulk of over your fungaloid foe. Dominance of the lower external appendical portions of the suit is within your grasp!
Look at the lit hallway, then back to the AI.
"Well, it looks like someone beat me to it. My fingers are twitching real bad. Is there any booze on this station? "
go to where the AI direct me to go.
(4) "booze? Of course there is! What kind of pirate ship goes anywhere without booze? You can find many varieties in the general crew mess halls' storage cabins. The quartermaster will assign you an allotment, which you can redeem at mess hall #3alpha, which is three flights up the main stairwell, first door on the left, or at any of the other crew mess halls as well!" The A.I. gives you afdditional direcetions to the quartermaster's ofice, which you find wiht relative ease. It is, however, unlit and locked, a "take a number" dispenser presenting the number "qualeph," waving it expectantly at you.
Red dot! My mortal enemy! We meet again at last! You may have eluded me all those times before, but this time it will be different! This is the time I will finally catch you and consume you, the day I shall taste your glowy flesh! Charge! Catch the red dot! Kill kill kill! This is the moment I've dreamed about! (https://xkcd.com/729/)
Name: Mr. Koff (pronounced "cough") / "Big Boi"
Rank: Vice Captain/Chief of Staff
Species: Cat
Description: An adult, slightly chubby, short-haired grey cat with green eyes. Has a hoarse, grouchy meow.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen
Previous occupation: Chief Mouser
Miscellaneous: Humans still take cats with them in their long voyages for company and pest control, though the pests they chase are somewhat more troublesome. This one stuck his head somewhere he wasn't supposed to and ended up here.
(1) you launch off the suit's shoulder as it rushes toward the atmospherics kiosk, only to be suddenly propelled to the left and pinned to the wall in a bundle of sticky fibres that smell faintly of lavender. "Target neutralized. Administering disciplinary measures, per standard quadrant 37-c6 beta ethical procedures, as outlined in the Galactic Gamblers' Guide to Taxxes IV Hold 'Em, volume 2." A thin squirt of rather dirty water drizzles out of a nozzle two feet away from your face, plopping into the dust and carpet of the hallway, leaving a muddy puddle. "N#g$ty Kixxxy. ^augh( Kit~." The speakers pronounce in staticky monotone. "Disciplinary coourse complete. Subject compliance satisfactory. administering cetification of completion and standard tier one reward, as outlined in the aforementioned Treatise on Proper Workshop Layout and Maintenance, volume 3." A small, blackened bead drops from a port on the ceiling onto your head, bouncing off and falling out of sight below. whatever it was, it had no discernable smell. Moments later, a second pellet falls onto your head, bounces off, and sticks to the fibers enmeshing you.
Travel to the medbay and search for the crew mate allegedly in a first aid kiosk in that area
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
(3) you find the crewperson (Zultan's character). You don't know that much about mammals or whatever, but you are pretty sure things aren't supposed to bend that way. The hologram nearby wearing a stethoscope awaits your command. "Uh ... fix him?" You suggest. "right away, sir. CODE GREY!" the hologram suddenly shouts. The sudden loud noise is followed by dozens of tubes, mechanical arms, and guaze dispensers pouring out of the walls, sometimes literally. Of the ones that don't fall into a puddle on the floor, one or two poke randomly at the body, which twitches and moans in reply, two actually seem to straighten and bandage whatever was most damaged, and one applies a very liberal heap of ointment onto the creature's face, wrapping the head in comical amounts of shockingly pristine medical gauze.
"Baby Shark.FLAC detected. Oh. Oh no. It's stuck on infinite loop..."
Unit-37 goes completely still
"Initiating emergency debugging mode"
Reboot into emergency safe/debug mode and attempt to purge the baby shark song.
If succesful, go and find the primary ship systems and enable those that seem to require enabling.
If unsuccesful, scream while attempting a full factory reset.
Name: Sanitation And Maintenance Unit 37
Species: Roomba with extreme upgrades
Description: Unit 37 started out as a simple, circular roomba for the workspace of a certain scientist. Said scientist amused himself with upgrading unit 37 piece by piece, to enable it to take on more cleaning duties, and eventually general maintance as well. Now it looks like a bulky humanoid industrial frame, wearing a grey boilersuit with SANITATION in bold letters. It's only distinguising traits from your run of the mill industrial cleaning bot is that it has one flexible, extendible tentacle attached to the back (to clean those hard to reach spots) and that its head is a a recased Roomba with one big glowing camera for an eye. The tentacle has three gripper claws and an nozzle to dispense cleaning fluid.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Anything non-corrosive (and clean)
Previous occupation: Maintenance and sanitation bot, Roomba (formerly)
Miscellaneous: Has somehow picked up a rather dainty apron somewhere that it has been wearing while on the ship. It's a dainty shade of light purple and says "Chortle, Cherish, Clean".
(5) your debug mode seems to work. When you reboot, you are no longer hearing Baby Shark, are dresed in only a n apron, and are vacuuming a single stretch of pristine carpet 9surrounded by perfectly filthy carpet completely untouched) in an unfamiliar room.
(6) You locate the nearest major ship system and go to it's control room, activating all the ship's weapons systems one by one. Naturally they immediately launch into DEFCON 3 and begin firing into the void. You have no way of knowing what they are shooting at, if they are hitting, or what the response will be. Satisfied with a job well done, you turn your attention to the next ship's system: The chemical plant. You are dangerously low on Pine Flavored Disinfectant and Organic Scented Aerosol Odor Obscurant.
Examine my surroundings for any crew, alive or dead. If none can be found, attempt to seek out the chief of staff. He has a way of bending Loggerheads to his will.
Name: Bubbles
Rank: Chaplain
Species: Harvester
Description: A robot shaped like a centipede, with blades, surgical, and masonry tools replacing the first three pairs of legs. Its 'antennae' have been replaced by a pair of bubble cameras.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Any non- corrosive (though organic particulate is appreciated.)
Previous occupation: Flesh Logger, (briefly) Cargo
Miscellaneous:
Was salvage payment from few jobs back. Eventually became Chaplain during a fad of "religious accessibility". The engravings on the chapel walls grow by one inch every year, in the direction of the hydroponics bay.
(5) you discover the ship's morgue. it's chock full of crew remains and religious opportunities. An information desk has a visitors' logbook appended. the screen blinks softly in blue, awaiting your signature.
Eh, it will do.
Start burning the mold away in the kitchen with my makeshift flamethrower.
(3) You blacken some mold, spewing dust and smoke into the air and failing to increase the percentage of your body that is burned. Yo manage to clear the doors of the refrigerator/freeze of much of the mold, leaving behind the evidence of your passing as you go.
Life Support: UNKNOWN. Oxygen seems okayish, if a bit thin
Engines: UNKNOWN. presumed functional, as gravity works. Also, power is functional, because if it weren't you and about half the planet you are allegedly orbiting would be vapor
Gravity: currently functional. you stick to the floor, somehow.
Life Support: UNKNOWN
Navigation: Functional.
Communications: UNKNOWN
Sensors: UNKNOWN
Weaponry: Online: firing
A.I: irritable. snarky.
Medical: UNKNOWN
crew quarters: UNKNOWN
Chemical Plant:EXTANT
Cargo: UNKNOWN
Captain: Sirix "Andre" 3000. Eelsuit
Vice Captain/Chief of Staff: Mr. "Big Boi" Koff. Cat
First Officer: UNFILLED
Chief of Medicine: UNFILLED
Quartermaster: UNFILLED
Master Engineer: UNFILLED
Navigator: "David Freeman." Currently in the guise of Tamatoa, a large crab.
Janitor: UNFILLED
Financial Officer: UNFILLED
Communications Officer: UNFILLED
Sensor Tech: UNFILLED
Ship's Dentist: Unit 37
Chaplain: Bubbles
Cook: UNFILLED
Other: UNSPECIFIED
Admire the shiny hologram and figure out a way to effectively and efficiently clean up this here medbay
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
Two stooges got us into this mess, two stooges will get us out! Comically leverage the other chump in here to push the button with them.
Name: Sirirx
Species: Vetan
Description: An old-timey space suit filled with eternally writhing eels.
Preferred Gravity: High
Preferred atmosphere: Ammonia
Previous occupation: Marrow Farmer
Miscellaneous: These crewmates look kinda tasty...
Gently examine myself and see if I can't find out if I actually need the bandages on my hands and also determent if I can talk or not.
(4) You pat yourself through the gauze and feel a tingling pain. you might not need to be cosplaying as a mutant Q-tip, but it seems the bandages and ointment are roughly in the right places. You test your voice. it works fine, though it is mufled by the wrappings. You get some ointment in your mouth. Your tongue goes numb. The bandages soak up any drool, at least.
Admire the shiny hologram and figure out a way to effectively and efficiently clean up this here medbay
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
(3) You aren't entirely sure what a medbay is supposed to look like when it is clean. Mushrooms are used in herbal remedies, right? You are pretty sure, at least, that the broken machinery and overturned carts should be disposed of. The thick sheen of some kind of industrial oil definitely should be mopped up, judging by the samll herd of dead rats laying at it's edges, the parts in contact with the oil being discolored and dissolved. You locate a wet floor sign and place it in front of the oil, taking great care not to step within a foot of the oil itself.
Read the book to determine their fate, and then sign off on it. Mourn the Loggerheads and their demise, and then ritualistically celebrate the life that they had given, and the value they have held, by ritualistically removing their most valuable organs, to later be sold. Once these most valuable pieces have been removed, go to the cafeteria.
(5) you are in luck. It seems that most of the valuable organs, and the brains, for some reason, have been removed and stored very carefully already. There are a few bodies that this process hasn't been completed on. Some of these are decayed husks, while a couple are themselves held in a sort of suspended animation. You deactivate this and dissect two bodies, carefully storing the organs in a separate cooler, which you label "totally not black market organs. Don't steal."
As for the logbook - it doesn't really give information on what happened to the mortuary residents: it's just a list of names, dates, and reason for visits, most of which are either "deliver body" or "collect remains and personal effects." "Drinking party" is a (surprisingly?) common occurrence as well.
Two stooges got us into this mess, two stooges will get us out! Comically leverage the other chump in here to push the button with them.
Name: Sirirx
Species: Vetan
Description: An old-timey space suit filled with eternally writhing eels.
Preferred Gravity: High
Preferred atmosphere: Ammonia
Previous occupation: Marrow Farmer
Miscellaneous: These crewmates look kinda tasty...
(2) you reach around to try to press the orb against the release button, but she dangles just out of reach of your eels, still trying to gorge herself on disinfectant tainted ammonia.
after consuming what is left of the mouse ,Zygomuc jumps ship and attempt to find where the cat went.
(1) you start gnawing on the mouse and fall off the eelsuit onto the floor, mouse side up. Something steps on you and you or the mouse let out an indignant squeak.
I walk up to the Quarter Master door. And kncok on the door.
"AI, can you open? There's know one here." I said out loud so the AI can hear me. If that doesn't work. Then I'll pull out a lock pick from my pocket and start fiddling with the lock.
you realize you only bolded the knock on the door part, right? Which you do. The Take-A-Number dispenser beeps angrily and waggles it's Qualph at you. You aren't sure whether to be offended or embarrassed to have a Qualph waggled in your face.
I’m smaller, so theoretically I can get done faster
Try getting my way past the captain to fill up on ammonia, when/if done, get out of the way so the captain breathes too
You and he both got Ammonia'd up last turn, silly. you are currently locked in the atmospherics booth, smelling inf industrial solvent and cleaner and dodging the Captain's grasping spacesuit fingers.
Head over to the chemical plant and acquire some heavy-duty cleaning supplies
(5) the motherlode. You stock up on as much as you can comfortably carry, catalogue the rest, and cackle in staticky glee as you prepare to hose down the entire space barge with Industrial Pine Fresh and Institutional Scrubbing Bubble-like Foam Spray and Windex.
Life Support: UNKNOWN. Oxygen seems okayish, if a bit thin
Engines: UNKNOWN. presumed functional, as gravity works. Also, power is functional, because if it weren't you and about half the planet you are allegedly orbiting would be vapor
Gravity: currently functional. you stick to the floor, somehow.
Life Support: UNKNOWN
Navigation: Functional.
Communications: UNKNOWN
Sensors: UNKNOWN
Weaponry: Online: firing
A.I: irritable. snarky.
Medical: UNKNOWN
crew quarters: UNKNOWN
Chemical Plant:EXTANT
Cargo: UNKNOWN
Captain: Sirix "Andre" 3000. Eelsuit
Vice Captain/Chief of Staff: Mr. "Big Boi" Koff. Cat
First Officer: UNFILLED
Chief of Medicine: UNFILLED
Quartermaster: UNFILLED
Master Engineer: UNFILLED
Navigator: "David Freeman." Currently in the guise of Tamatoa, a large crab.
Janitor: UNFILLED
Financial Officer: UNFILLED
Communications Officer: UNFILLED
Sensor Tech: UNFILLED
Ship's Dentist: Unit 37
Chaplain: Bubbles
Cook: UNFILLED
Other: UNSPECIFIED
”Huh...mushrooms.”
Dispose of the carts and broken crap, pick the mushrooms and store them in a preservative container, check on the patient, then get a mop and mop up that nasty oil. In that order. ;D
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
"Very well! Take this!"
Gently kick the squeaky mouse-thing at the door release button. At least I hope it's a button, I'm not sure projectile rodent corpses are a regulation method of operating levers or hand scanners.
Name: Sirirx
Species: Vetan
Description: An old-timey space suit filled with eternally writhing eels.
Preferred Gravity: High
Preferred atmosphere: Ammonia
Previous occupation: Marrow Farmer
Miscellaneous: These crewmates look kinda tasty... but I probably shouldn't eat my own crew. Maybe as a special treat?
"Oh man I almost died, I need to get out of here."
See if there's a doctor around as some one with medical knowledge had to have fixed me, if there is one around find out how long I have to be bandaged up like this, then see if there is any kind of task I'm supposed to be doing.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Inventory:
Phone
Meow until I am free. Scratch and bite the thing that is holding me until I am free. One of the two is bound to work eventually.
Name: Mr. Koff (pronounced "cough") / "Big Boi"
Rank: Vice Captain/Chief of Staff
Species: Cat
Description: An adult, slightly chubby, short-haired grey cat with green eyes. Has a hoarse, grouchy meow.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen
Previous occupation: Chief Mouser
Miscellaneous: Humans still take cats with them in their long voyages for company and pest control, though the pests they chase are somewhat more troublesome. This one stuck his head somewhere he wasn't supposed to and ended up here.
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
”Alright, oil creature, this means war.”
Locate a source of water or cleaning liquid, then find a hose of some kind that I can use to spray the water or cleaning liquid at the oil
"I don't know how I got here ether."
It is time to arm myself to increase my likely hood of survival by searching for some kind of weapon.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Inventory:
Phone
Name: Cog the Goblin
Species: Goblin
Description: Cog is small; standing at 3ft and weighing less than 60lbs. Cog has greenish-grey skin, his ears are large and floppy yet his eyes are yellow and beady. The goblin has a big mouth with tiny teeth, but is missing a few giving him a somewhat snaggletooth smile. Cog often wears a vest with innumerable pockets for whatever the hell he picks up off the ground. His pants are holey and ragged, but upon his feet the goblin wears a fancy pair of shiny black cowboy boots that he keeps in perfect shape yet their one size larger than his own shoe size.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred Atmosphere: Oxygen
Previous Occupation: Space Garbage Man.
Miscellaneous: Obsession with shiny objects.
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
”Alright, oil creature, this means war.”
Locate a source of water or cleaning liquid, then find a hose of some kind that I can use to spray the water or cleaning liquid at the oil
(4) you get a hose and spray water at the oil. this goes exactly like one would expect spraying water at oil would go. The oil spreads across every surface it coems into contact with, though it is pushed back by the water.. The entire medbay is now completely contaminated by the biohazardous material. "Hmm. I was sure that oil and water would mix really well. But somehow, this isn't happening. Maybe I'll try fire next time!"
Flip the number dispenser off and go to wherever I got to go for my booze.
(5) you get the booze. You sign some electronic form, and the computer starts calling you "Kyu Em" for some reason.
"I don't know how I got here ether."
It is time to arm myself to increase my likely hood of survival by searching for some kind of weapon.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Inventory:
Phone
(1) you yank off one of your antlers and swing it around menacingly. You hit yourself in the shin, then again in the gut. You double over in pain. You go to the medbay, but a crab is waging a losing battle with some toxic waste in ther, so you think better of it and stagger off in what you hope is the direction of the crew quarters to sleep it off.
Name: Cog the Goblin
Species: Goblin
Description: Cog is small; standing at 3ft and weighing less than 60lbs. Cog has greenish-grey skin, his ears are large and floppy yet his eyes are yellow and beady. The goblin has a big mouth with tiny teeth, but is missing a few giving him a somewhat snaggletooth smile. Cog often wears a vest with innumerable pockets for whatever the hell he picks up off the ground. His pants are holey and ragged, but upon his feet the goblin wears a fancy pair of shiny black cowboy boots that he keeps in perfect shape yet their one size larger than his own shoe size.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred Atmosphere: Oxygen
Previous Occupation: Space Garbage Man.
Miscellaneous: Obsession with shiny objects.
You awake in a pile of garbage, wedged into a maintenance shaft behind the primary kitchen facilities. this is not an unusual situation for you, as you have been sleeping here for as long as you can remember. You've managed to keep the rats at bay, in spite of the leftover food packets, soiled garments, and piles of rotten hay, by the simple expedient of lots of rat poison. You don't eat the dead rats anymore. You only made that mistake once ... in a while.
What is unusual is the amount of light leaking in through the walls and through the grme on the emergency hatch window. Heck, you diodn't even know the hatch had a window before. What's with all this light out there? You stare dumbfounded at the murky window, idly picking roaches off your fur ror skin and eating them. Hmm, seem to be a lot more roaches in here today. Must be running from the lights.
Zygomuc got stepped on... by another fungal growth? Unacceptable! Devour the entire thing!
(6) you consume the fungoid and double in size. You belch spores for a while and turn from whatever color you were to a bright orange. You have a sudden urge to eat plastic.
Meow at the hologram in the hopes that it will interpret that as something useful (like giving me a job or an idea about what to investigate) or at least mildly amusing.
(1) The hologram barks at you. How rude. You are starting to think this ship doesn't even know how to function itself, let alone how to give proper attention and praise to it's feline overlord. there's only one thing to do with a being as dumb and big as this: teach it to hunt! You look around for dead rodents to place at the hologram's feet.
Life Support: UNKNOWN. Oxygen seems okayish, if a bit thin
Engines: UNKNOWN. presumed functional, as gravity works. Also, power is functional, because if it weren't you and about half the planet you are allegedly orbiting would be vapor
Gravity: currently functional. you stick to the floor, somehow.
Life Support: UNKNOWN
Navigation: Functional.
Communications: UNKNOWN
Sensors: UNKNOWN
Weaponry: Online: firing
A.I: irritable. snarky.
Medical: Medbay under attack by some sort of vile and corrosive oil
crew quarters: UNKNOWN
Chemical Plant:EXTANT
Cargo: UNKNOWN. Also Booze.
Captain: Sirix "Andre" 3000. Eelsuit
Vice Captain/Chief of Staff: Mr. "Big Boi" Koff. Cat
First Officer: UNFILLED
Chief of Medicine: UNFILLED
Quartermaster: Rosomio. Space Human
Master Engineer: UNFILLED
Navigator: "David Freeman." Currently in the guise of Tamatoa, a large crab.
Janitor: UNFILLED
Financial Officer: UNFILLED
Communications Officer: UNFILLED
Sensor Tech: UNFILLED
Ship's Dentist: Unit 37
Chaplain: Bubbles
Cook: UNFILLED
Other: UNSPECIFIED
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
Find some matches or a blowtorch and light the oil on fire, exiting the room as soon as the flames take effect
Captain Sirirx snaps out of his ammonia reverie.
"Right, time for leadership!"
Try to find the ship's bridge, cockpit, command deck, or other area wherein a captain is expected to sit or meander about barking orders.
Name: Sirirx
Species: Vetan
Description: An old-timey space suit filled with eternally writhing eels.
Preferred Gravity: High
Preferred atmosphere: Ammonia
Previous occupation: Marrow Farmer
Miscellaneous: These crewmates look kinda tasty... but I probably shouldn't eat my own crew. Maybe as a special treat?
"Oh shit I ripped off on of my own antlers I think I'm starting to lose it, god I hope I can put it back."
Go try to find the crew quarters so I can rest, failing that just find a decent looking chair.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Inventory:
Phone
Antler
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
With the medbay sparkling, how about I find something else to clean up while steering clear of that robot
Continue to sleep and hope my injuries heal.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Inventory:
Phone
Antler
Use the flashlight on my phone to figure out where the exit is, then use it to get out of here.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Inventory:
Phone
Antler
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
Scurry back to that navigation room and see what the ship is freaking out about now...
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
Go find my self a space suit that will fit so I can breathe until the air is fixed, or at least a bowl full of water I can put on my head and make sure it doesn’t spill
"Oh god I'm gonna die!"
For get about washing off I need to find a space suit.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Inventory:
Phone
Antler
"We're so screwed."
Look for some kind of welding equipment so I can try to fix the holes in the hull.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Inventory:
Phone
Antler
some kind of space gear
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
Exercise caution as I search for the invaders. Pick up an available weapon should I happen to come across one. If not, my claws should work fine for hand to hand—er—claw combat
"There's got to more stuff around here."
Keep searching for equipment to fix the ship.
Name: Dr. Bob
Species: Deerman
Description: Average looking for someone of his species.
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: oxygen
Previous occupation: Geneticist
Miscellaneous: Would prefer not to be here.
Inventory:
Phone
Antler
some kind of space gear
duct tape
length of cord
Name: Tamatoa
Species: Coconut Crab
Description: A large crab, bluish-purple in color in most places except his back, which is more of an orange...sorta plaid theme. Has two arms with pincers, five legs and one stump where the sixth leg used to be (although I don’t remember if crabs have six or eight legs normally), two swiveling eyestalks with more human-like eyes, and a mouth that also resembles that of a human
Preferred Gravity: Medium
Preferred atmosphere: Oxygen and water are both acceptable
Previous occupation: Hoarding
Miscellaneous: Loves all things SHINY and has no regard for any inner qualities.
An airlock huh? Continue the cautious search elsewhere