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Author Topic: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.  (Read 448976 times)

MaximumZero

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Because no one answered that, I'll posit a furthermore.

Furthermore, if dorfs fish with their beards, and dorfs mince with their beards, why don't they ever pull up minced fish?
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probably figured an autobiography wouldn't be interesting

SirAaronIII

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Quote
With all the inventions of the day, why am I forced to mod in shovels?
Furthermore, if dorfs fish with their beards, and dorfs mince with their beards, why don't they ever pull up minced fish?
1. Shovels? Ha, who needs shovels. Everyone knows that real dwarves use picks. ONLY picks. On everything, including dirt.
2. I assume they lower one hair of their beard to fish, and use the whole thing like steel wool for mincing.

If the dinosaurs are dead, then why are there FB and titan dinosaurs?
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"I want to watch the sun setting below the horizon, thinking about my significance in this world. That's my dream."

acetech09

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*necro'd. I just thought of a question so I had to.*

They aren't dinosaurs. they look like dinosaurs. They are actually shards of Armok's beard, and since Armok is slightly immature, he still loves dinosaurs and has dinosaur pajamas, he like sending dinosaurs at his dwarves and watch them go *RAWR*

Why does bismuth bronze not contain any bismuth?
« Last Edit: August 28, 2011, 12:26:55 pm by acetech09 »
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Theifofdreams

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It does, but the beard hates dealing with bronze AND bismuth so it destroys the bismuth.

Why haven't dwarfs destroyed the planet, or at least taken over, given the mass destruction they cause?

Sting_Auer

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Their beards know when they are beginning to cause too much destruction. The beards then cause them to go into moods that they never come out of, which is why we have insane dwarves.


Why the Circus is it that the dwarven mountainhomes won't let you take subterranean creatures with you to the new fortress?
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Thank you everyone for the help! I've since flooded the fortress I was working on and now have a new one going up.

jaxy15

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The mountainhomes are selfish about subterranean creatures.

Why don't goblins use troll breast milk?
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Dwarf Fortress: Threats of metabolism.

MaximumZero

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The mountainhomes are selfish about subterranean creatures.

Why don't goblins use troll breast milk?

Would you? I wouldn't. Troll fur is bad enough.

Who decided that it would be a good idea to eat intestines, anyway?
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Holy crap, why did I not start watching One Punch Man earlier? This is the best thing.
probably figured an autobiography wouldn't be interesting

Angel Of Death

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People in the middle age. They ate every part of the animal.

Why are the beards attached to the dorfs?
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Frogwarrior

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It's actually the other way around. Beards don't have legs or arms, so they need a host body.
(Also, re: the intestines: The better question would be, where's the REST of the hotdog?)

If the Forgotten Beasts were forgotten, why does everyone know their names?
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Lately, I'm proud of MAGMA LANDMINES:
http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=91789.0
And been a bit smug over generating a world with an elephant monster that got 87763 sentient kills.
http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=104354.0

acetech09

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That's the only thing that's remembered. After your entire military is in the hospital, you wonder why you didn't remember that the FB they just fought caused full systemic necrosis.

If you made dwarves any more drunk, what would you call that?
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Komra

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They actually are entirely incapable of overconsumption of alcohol. In dorfen biology, alcohol and its related substances are converted upon consumption into substances from which their cells can assemble vital carbohydrates, proteins, etc. This process has become so efficient that dwaves do not actually feel an alcoholic 'buzz,' but instead their body releases endorphins, adrenaline, and/or dopamine (depending on the dwarf/alcohol combination, which along with simple taste causes their preference). This is what spurs dwarves to continue their rampant 'alcoholism' that actually is more like an organic drug addiction.
Kinda went off on a tangent there, but I love coming up with random fake-science stuff. Hehe.

How do dwarves draw out magma for use in a forge?
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But you never see a movie where a terrible coal plant accident causes a horrible devastation, do you? Nope, everyone seems to think that nuclear plants get their energy by smacking live atomic warheads all day or something.

andyman564

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dwarves do not physically draw the magma up to the forges, they merely insert a heat gathering pipe into said magma, and when 4/7ths of the pipe is submerged it can gather enough heat to power the forges.


why is it that while dwarves can pump magma over hundreds of z-levels, burn wood and operate forges, they cannot light a simple campfire.
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Yeah.  Thus why I didn't make a trap.  In it's current state the fortress didn't need a trap, the whole damn fortress is a trap.

Liber celi

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Because campfire are symbols of imperialistic human invaders.

how is badger man babbie formed?
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jaxy15

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they need to do way instain sow who killed thier babbies. because these babby cant fright back?

How can dwarven babies punch a dragon in the ribs so hard a rib jams through it's heart?
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Dwarf Fortress: Threats of metabolism.

flieroflight

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dwarfs can channel the essence of captain falcon at fare moments in time
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