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[Bumber]

Why doesn't sound emanate from most activities?

You're deaf. (The music is all in your head.)

Why doesn't fire spread in adventure mode? (Or: Some men just want to watch the field burn.)

[pisskop]

It does.  Start a fire by a tree.  Then stand next to it.  Wait for a few turns and now your adventurer has Mario fireball powers.

Why is there no steam power?

[Bumber]

It does.  Start a fire by a tree.  Then stand next to it.  Wait for a few turns and now your adventurer has Mario fireball powers.

Let me rephrase that: Why doesn't fire spread on its own?

Why is there no steam power?

The dwarf who would have discovered it fell into the magma that was powering his contraption. And then the whole thing collapsed on top of him.

[hops]

Why don't dwarves give booze to patients?

[P(ony)SI]

Why don't dwarves give booze to patients?

As you know, dwarves slow down when they don't have booze.
Dwarves have a strange metabolism where ethanol is the equivalent of crack to us, which also explains why they think it's a good idea to charge at their enemies without any weapons or armor.
In the past, there were often booze shortages in the wild, so their bodies developed a way to be able to survive the sober conditions: put both the mind and the body in a depression. Mother Nature being the genius she is, she reasoned that if a dwarf's body slowed down metabolism and became unhappy, the dwarf would take longer to die from any accidents. (Unfortunately, Armok doesn't create accidents)
Naturally, dwarves learned to exploit this, so a sober dwarf will take longer to die when their lungs are removed due to rotting finger tissue than a happy dwarf.

Is there a reason why the dwarves haven't invented the wheel yet? Sure, there's the wheelbarrow, but it has to be operated without a wheel of some sort, or I think there would already be magma-powered cars.

[flame99]

Simple: The great and powerful Armok has seen the wheel lead to more advanced technology, like automatons, and unfortunately, those don't bleed.

WWUD if he was Armok?

[Komra]

Uther was asked to fill in for Armok for the day. Uther created the newest fantasy world, crafting it with care and attention, working hard to make it a perfect land for all of the species upon it.

He failed horribly. Without the struggles that strengthen the civilized races, they fell against the inevitable horde of Megabeasts, which are integral to Armok's world-creating ability.

Subsequently, Armok came back and heartily congratulated Uther on successfully bathing a world in the blood of whole civilizations. Uther left in shame.


What is the answer to the Dwarven Question of Death, the MAGMAAAAAA, and Who Cares about Anything Else?

[flame99]

Cheese, the precursor to any great massacre.

[pisskop]

Why don't dwarves produce and enact theatrical plays?

[Mr Space Cat]

They are. Some dwarves consider the standard dwarven fortress to be the penultimate example of a tragic comedy, and the best part is it's all ad libbed.

Why do dwarves embark to evil regions when they know there's going to be zombies and blood rain that melts faces?

[flame99]

Because when the faces melt and the zombies kill, blood comes for Armok!

Why do the dwarves still worship Armok, who kills them by the cosmic-sized handfuls?

[Vid_the_Impaler]

Because Armok does not exist in-game.

How come when my dwarves get upset with the conditions in the fortress they never emigrate?

[wierd]

Because, despite how horribly despotic and miasma infused the atmosphere of the fortress is, it is still more aesthetically pleasing than the RNG generated fortress sites created at world gen, there is nowhere else to go.

(This is also why they they immigrate almost immediately to a new fortress that gets founded later, carrying all their emotional baggage with them.)



How is it, that necromancer towers can be built of stone blocks of a kind that simply cannot be found on the site, (Say, microcline on a swamp dominated by peat and mudstone?) Without having any masons in their order, and without any mason workshops?

[Bumber]

How is it, that necromancer towers can be built of stone blocks of a kind that simply cannot be found on the site, (Say, microcline on a swamp dominated by peat and mudstone?) Without having any masons in their order, and without any mason workshops?

Waylaid caravans. Contracted laborers.

[hops]

How is it, that necromancer towers can be built of stone blocks of a kind that simply cannot be found on the site, (Say, microcline on a swamp dominated by peat and mudstone?) Without having any masons in their order, and without any mason workshops?

Waylaid caravans. Contracted laborers.

That or BLAK MAJYYKS.