Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[GrimDark_Majyyks]

How is it, that necromancer towers can be built of stone blocks of a kind that simply cannot be found on the site, (Say, microcline on a swamp dominated by peat and mudstone?) Without having any masons in their order, and without any mason workshops?

Waylaid caravans. Contracted laborers.

That or BLAK MAJYYKS.

Oh. I thought someone had called me. Blak is my cousin; we don't talk. He has horrible taste though, it is totally possible he gave necromancers hideous candy-blue rocks simply to offend my sensibilities. I shall have to intercept him and give them glumprong instead.

[TheDarkStar]

If a dwarf is legendary in dodging, why does it not dodge out of the way when a miner channels under it?

[GrimDark_Majyyks]

If a dwarf is legendary in dodging, why does it not dodge out of the way when a miner channels under it?

Maybe his observation is low.

[pisskop]

Why do slabs ALWAYS hold either one dead creature's name or secrets?

[Dirac]

Their temperatures are capped in the nether sections of the temperature scale, and entropy keeps them at said cap. Hence, the name.

Thermodynamics: You're doing it wrong.

[Liber celi]

Aristotelian Tragedy. She never had a chance.

How do my dwarves know all the dead goblins' names?

[Ora_the_Owlish]

No self-respecting goblin would neglect to embroider his name on his *cave troll fur underpants*

Why is Urist McMiner afraid of a little warm stone, but sees nothing wrong with leaping beard-first into dragonfire?

[Ora_the_Owlish]

You haven't sacrificed enough dorfs to the RNG.

Why is Urist McDisgustedbymiasma idling on the corpse stockpile?

[Drazinononda]

Because you designated the corpse pile inside his fortress.

Why do my dwarves insist on trying to collect webs behind locked doors?

[CapnUrist]

Because your incessant need to lock doors will not dissuade their passion for the art of silk weaving!

Why are goblin thieves only interested in children, while kobold thieves are only interested in material goods?

[InfinityOrNone]

Because goblins are Dwarven Child Protection Services.

Why do Jeweler's Workshops wall off eastern openings?

[Swonnrr]

Because dwarven religion says to build from left, and that's statistically the best way to stay stranded, wich usually leads to a lot of Armok Offerings.

How can a spider the size of child rip of a dwarf's head from the first attack?

[escondida]

Because fortress-born dwarves *are* the size of dwarven children, and because those mandibles are *strong*.

Why did dwarves suddenly get really bad at finding underground rivers and bottomless pits?

[Drazinononda]

They didn't.

Why do I get every megabeast except Titans at my forts?

[flame99]

Because they're off fighting crime.

Why does this thread keep dying then coming back to life?