Bay 12 Games Forum

Finally... => Forum Games and Roleplaying => Roll To Dodge => Topic started by: Yoink on October 06, 2012, 12:39:15 pm

Title: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Yoink on October 06, 2012, 12:39:15 pm
BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY

DEDICATED TO PROTECTING THE INTERNET FROM STUPID PEOPLE AND STUFF
YOU ARE DEWY-EYED IDEALISTIC ROOKIE SIGNING UP TO DO GOOD DEEDS AND ALL THAT

IN THE BAYTWELVENCY THERE ARE 12 DIVISIONS

COMMAND DIVISION
COMMANDO DIVISION
STRATEGY DIVISION
IT DIVISION
PAPER-PLANE-MAKING DIVISION
FINANCIAL DIVISION
PETTING ZOO DIVISION
GENERAL MAINTENANCE
SCIENCE DIVISION
GENERAL ENGINEERING
PAPER PUSHING DIVISION
JANITORIAL DIVISION

ALL THOSE SOUND REAL EXCITING AND STUFF, BUT YOU RESUME TOO BAD

YOU JANITOR

MOPPING FLOORS, PLUGGING BULLETHOLES IN WALLS, DISPOSING OF SECRET BODIES AND STUFF

MAYBE ONE DAY YOU GET PROMOTED TO PAPER PUSHING

FOR NOW YOU CLEAN POOP
MAYBE SHOULD HAVE BEEN A LAWYER LIKE [INSERT RELATIVE HERE] ALWAYS SAID
OH WELL

YOU ALL START OFF IN JANITORIAL BULLPEN

YOU EACH HAVE (1)JANITORIAL JUMPSUIT, (1)WOODEN MOP, (1)DENTED METAL BUCKET

SEVERAL POINTS ON THE BIG MAP ON WALL ARE FLASHING

THAT MEANS YOU GOT WORK TO DO, PEOPLE

>GET TO WORK
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: da_nang on October 06, 2012, 12:56:27 pm
EXCELLENT... >:D

>GRAB ZE GEAR AND GET TO ZE IT DIVISION. MONITOR ZE MONITORS VILE PRETENDING TO MOP ZE FLOOR. JA.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: LordSlowpoke on October 06, 2012, 01:29:52 pm
BREAK MAP

JOB COMPLETE
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Digital Hellhound on October 06, 2012, 01:31:01 pm
BAY 12 IS SECRET AGENCY? GREAT. CHECK POSITIONS OF PROMINENT BAY12ERS. START WITH YOINK (PROBABLY A JANITOR TOO).
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: TopHat on October 06, 2012, 01:36:37 pm
Grab gear.
Get to work, humming.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Yoink on October 06, 2012, 01:53:57 pm
EXCELLENT... >:D

>GRAB ZE GEAR AND GET TO ZE IT DIVISION. MONITOR ZE MONITORS VILE PRETENDING TO MOP ZE FLOOR. JA.

[1] YOU FILL YOUR BUCKET WITH SOAPY WATER, GRAB A HANDFUL OF ASSORTED SPONGES TO COMPLEMENT YOUR MOP, THEN HURRY OFF OVER TO IT DIVISION

YOU ARE PRETENDING TO WORK, MOPPING THE NON-DIRTY FLOOR WHEN SOMETHING REALLY INTERESTING POPS UP ON AN UNATTENTDED SCREEN

YOU STEP FOWARD TO TAKE A LOOK AND KNOCK OVER YOUR BUCKET, SPILLING HOT SOAPY WATER OVER A BUNCH OF CABLES

SMOKE POURS OUT, ALARMS START TO GO OFF

WHOOPS

BREAK MAP

JOB COMPLETE


[2] YOU CAN'T REACH IT

...YOU'RE KINDA SHORT

BAY 12 IS SECRET AGENCY? GREAT. CHECK POSITIONS OF PROMINENT BAY12ERS. START WITH YOINK (PROBABLY A JANITOR TOO).

[6] YOU HEAD ON OVER TO THE JANITORIAL COMPUTER TERMINAL (IT'S PRETTY DODGY, BUT IT KINDA WORKS)

YOU BRING UP A LIST OF EMPLOYEES

YOU'RE PRETTY SURE THIS STUFF WAS SUPPOSED TO BE OFF-LIMITS, BUT YOU MANAGE TO FIND A PROFILE MARKED 'YOINK'
APPARENTLY HE SHE OR IT WORKS IN THE PAPER-PLANE-MAKING DIVISION

THAT'S SEVEN DIVISIONS ABOVE YOURS WOW THAT GUY MUST BE REALLY AWESOME AND MYSTERIOUS

UNFORTUNATELY YOU HAVE BEEN SLACKING OFF AND DAYDREAMING AND MASTER JANITOR McGEE ROLLS OVER AND STARTS SHOUTING AT YOU

HE IS WEARING A FUNNY HAT AND IS THREATENING TO GET YOU DEMOTED

YOU'RE ABOUT TO ASK WHAT COULD POSSIBLY BE WORSE THAN JANITORS, BUT THEN YOU REALISE

OH NO

OH GOD NO THAT'S WHAT HE MEANS

ANYTHING BUT THAT
YOU HAD REALLY BETTER GET TO WORK

Grab gear.
Get to work, humming.


[2]YOU GET YOUR STUFF TOGETHER, HEAD OVER TO THE NEAREST TAP AND START TO FILL YOUR BUCKET

YOU HUM MEANWHILE

SADLY THE DAMN THING IS KINDA HEAVY, AND THE ASSIGNMENT YOU CHOSE IS WAY OVER IN B57 BLOCK. THAT'S A LONG WALK
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: TopHat on October 06, 2012, 01:59:21 pm
Find a closer assignment. Failing that, PERSEVERE!Whilst humming
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: LordSlowpoke on October 06, 2012, 02:00:53 pm
FIND THE MOST GRUESOME ASSIGNMENT AND HEAD TO SAID ASSIGNMENT WITH A SPONGE IN HAND AND TEASPOON OF SALTWATER IN OTHER
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Greenstarfanatic on October 06, 2012, 02:15:10 pm
>JUGGLE WHILE CLEANING.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: da_nang on October 06, 2012, 02:24:08 pm
SCHEISSE.

>PULL ZE CABLES! ALL OF ZEM! SCHNELL!
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Scelly9 on October 06, 2012, 02:24:58 pm
Clean while juggling!
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: mcclay on October 06, 2012, 03:11:24 pm
GO TO RANDOM SOPT AND CLEAN SHIT.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: hops on October 06, 2012, 03:30:34 pm
TELL A TECHNICIAN TO FIX DA_NANG'S MESS
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Yoink on October 07, 2012, 07:16:48 am
Find a closer assignment. Failing that, PERSEVERE!Whilst humming

[4] YOU CHOOSE CLOSER JOB INSTEAD

NEED TO MOP UP LEAK IN CHEMICAL STORAGE HALLWAY NEARBY IN F07

FIND THE MOST GRUESOME ASSIGNMENT AND HEAD TO SAID ASSIGNMENT WITH A SPONGE IN HAND AND TEASPOON OF SALTWATER IN OTHER

[5] YOU WANT MOST GRUESOME ASSIGNMENT?! YOU GET MOST GRUESOME ASSIGNMENT, DAMNIT

YOU GRAB SPONGE, SPOON AND SALTWATER AND HEAD OFF TOWARDS D647

THEY ARE DISSECTING DISEASED PART OF YOUTUBE IN LAB, NEED YOU TO MOP UP MESS + GET RID OF ICKY BITS

ON YOUR WAY OVER THERE LIGHT SUDDENLY DIMS FOR A MOMENT, BEFORE THE EMERGENCY GENERATOR KICKS IN.
WEIRD, BUT STUFF LIKE THAT HAPPENS A LOT APPARENTLY

>JUGGLE WHILE CLEANING.

[1] LA LA LAAA

OH BOY CLEANING IS SUCH EXCELLENT FUN WHEN YOU CAN JUGGL--

OH GOD MILITARY GRADE BLEACH IN THE EYYYYYYEEES OH IT HURTS IT HURTS

Item Lost: Sight!

IT IS DARK. YOU HURT

SCHEISSE.

>PULL ZE CABLES! ALL OF ZEM! SCHNELL!

OH GOTT OH GOTT VAT DO YOU DO?!

UNPLUG EVERYTHING, OF COURSE
THAT'S WHAT YOU DO WHEN WATER GETS ON THEM ELECTRICAL THINGIES, RIGHT?!

[1]BBBBZZZZZZZZTTTTSSSHHKKKRZZZZZ

Clean while juggling!

[1] (WTF RANDOM.ORG)

YOU WATCH SOME GUY ATTEMPT TO JUGGLE CLEANING PRODUCTS UP AHEAD OF YOU

DUMBASS SPILLS BLEACH IN HIS EYES
AS HE SCREAMS HIS HEAD OFF, YOU DECIDE TO SHOW HIM (WELL IF HE COULD SEE, HA HA) HOW IT'S DONE

WHILST STILL MOPPING WITH ONE HAND

SUDDENLY THE LIGHTS FLICKER IN THE MIDDLE OF YOUR PERFORMANCE, AND YOU DO THE EXACT SAME THING

WELL DONE

Item Lost: Sight!

GO TO RANDOM SOPT AND CLEAN SHIT.

[4] YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES AND RUN OFF WILLY-NILLY

END UP IN BATHROOM BLOCK T-437

TOILET IS CLOGGED, YOU ARE PRETTY SURE

SMELLS BAD, MAN

ALSO LIGHTS FLICKER, HEAR SCREAMING IN DISTANCE, ALL THAT JAZZ

TELL A TECHNICIAN TO FIX DA_NANG'S MESS

[1] YOU WATCH AS DA_NANG SPILLS WATER ON THE CABLES

YOU IMMEDIATELY TURN AND RUN TOWARDS A DOOR AS THE SIRENS START WAILING AND SHOUT FOR A TECHNICIAN, PLEASE, OH GOD WHERE ARE ALL THE TECHNICIANS

OH THERE THEY ARE, RUSHING ONTO SCENE

...THEY'RE KINDA HEAVILY ARMED
DON'T LOOK TOO HAPPY EITHER

YOU START TO EXPLAIN WHAT HAPPENDED WHEN ONE OF THEM SMACKS YOU IN HEAD WITH RIFLE BUTT AND PUSHES PAST

Item Lost: Consciousness!


((GM HAS NO IDEA WHERE HE IS GOING WITH THIS

RUNNING OUT OF INSPIRATION HALP))
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: TopHat on October 07, 2012, 07:48:54 am
Go and mop up chemical leak. While humming!
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: LordSlowpoke on October 07, 2012, 09:19:44 am
ACQUIRE MESS AND TURN IT INTO A POWER GENERATOR

HOOK UP TO MAIN POWER GRID

PUT ICKY BITS IN SPONGE, SELL ON SIDE FOR PROFITS
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Digital Hellhound on October 07, 2012, 10:23:34 am
BEGIN FORUM GAME IN AGENCY NETWORK. NAME IT 'BAY 12 IS FORUMS'. MAKE IT SO EVERYONE IN THE AGENCY IS ACTUALLY JUST PART OF AN ONLINE FORUM
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Greenstarfanatic on October 07, 2012, 11:12:43 am
TAKE SCELLY TO MED BAY.

AVOID OBVIOUS STATEMENT.


((Maybe make it so whenever we complete a task we're assigned, we get closer to levelling up to a new position.))
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: mcclay on October 07, 2012, 11:14:22 am
UNCLOG TAHT MOTHERFUCKER.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Neyvn on October 07, 2012, 11:19:13 am
\\Joining\\

Be somewhere else from all the mayhem atm, cleaning in another department...
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: RedWarrior0 on October 07, 2012, 11:27:30 am
BEGIN TO CLEAN CLEANING SUPPLIES
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: miauw62 on October 07, 2012, 11:30:10 am
PRETEND TO BE GORDON FREEMAN, SMASH RATS WITH MOP
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: chevil on October 07, 2012, 11:30:39 am
PRETEND TO TAKE CLEANING SUPLIES.
FOLD PAPER AIRPLANES SECRETLY.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Scelly9 on October 07, 2012, 12:50:04 pm
Build robotic eyes out of cleaning supplies.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Spinal_Taper on October 07, 2012, 12:51:16 pm
Ask for promotion to science bloke.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: da_nang on October 07, 2012, 01:51:22 pm
MEIN GOTT!

>VILE HOLDING ZE VOODEN END, SMASH ZE MONITORS VITH ZE MOP.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: hops on October 07, 2012, 03:07:05 pm
GET OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. SPY AROUND FACILITY
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: misko27 on October 07, 2012, 03:26:16 pm
ASK WHAT ARE CRITERION FOR PROMOTION.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Kaiserr on October 07, 2012, 04:36:07 pm
EAT THE MOP TO IMPRESS THE BOSS AND BECOME PROMOTED TO COMMANDO DIVISION
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Corai on October 07, 2012, 04:37:15 pm
STEAL SECRET DOCUMENTS. SELL SECRET DOCUMENTS TO RIVAL FORUM AGENCIES.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Teneb on October 07, 2012, 04:42:44 pm
GET PROMOTED BY MAKING PEOPLE IN ABOVE DIVISION SUFFER ACCIDENTS
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Praecordia on October 07, 2012, 05:15:26 pm
BE JANITOR. CLEAN JANITORIAL CLOSET.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: chevil on October 09, 2012, 12:57:30 am
FOLD THE BEST PAPER AIRPLANE EVER
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Xantalos on October 09, 2012, 01:45:20 am
>APPEAR OUT OF RANDOM DOOR
WERE IN CLOSET FOR 57 YEARS
AM NOW LEGENDARY +INFINITY JANITOR
>CLEAN WHOLE BUILDING
GET PROMOTE
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Yoink on October 17, 2012, 12:05:37 am
Go and mop up chemical leak. While humming!

[6] YOU MAKE IT TO F07 IN DOUBLE TIME, LOWERING YOUR MOP AND GETTING TO WORK WIPING UP SOME GLOWING PURPLE GOOP FROM NEXT TO A CRACK IN A WALL



AHH SATISFACTION

YOU HUM A HAPPY TUNE. YOU FEEL VERY HAPPY. GOSH, PHYSICAL WORK SURE DOES AGREE WITH YOU

YOU FEEL A BIT LIGHT-HEADED ACTUALLY

MAYBE YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD?

ACQUIRE MESS AND TURN IT INTO A POWER GENERATOR

HOOK UP TO MAIN POWER GRID

PUT ICKY BITS IN SPONGE, SELL ON SIDE FOR PROFITS


YOU SHUFFLE INTO THE LABORATORY

A GUY IN HOSPITAL SCRUBS PUSHES THE DOOR CLOSED BEHIND YOU

THERE ARE SEVERAL PEOPLE DRESSED SAME WAY WORKING ON SOME LARGE, QUIVERING SLAB OF WHAT LOOKS LIKE PURE, RANCID INTERNET ON OPERATING TABLE IN MIDDLE OF ROOM

OCCASIONALLY LIGHTS FLICKER ACROSS ITS BUMPY, SLIMY SURFACE AS THEY CUT AWAY AT IT, MACHINES BEEPING AS THEY SCAN

YOU SEE STRANGE LINES OF TEXT LIKE "aahh its so happy! haha its great? :]"  "i think? the blondie and the wig are cute but idk if they r the same person btw im egyptian soo im a wog aswell -333"  "loool 'i have capsican? spray and im not afraid to use it'" FLASHING ACROSS THE SCREEN IN TIME WITH THE STRANGE TISSUE'S SPASMS

YOU PUT ASIDE YOUR DISGUST AND ATTEMPT TO TURN IT INTO A POWER GENERATOR FOR SOME REASON

[1] YOU JAM HANDFUL OF ELECTRICAL CABLES INTO IT

IT "SCREAMS", ECHOES OF INARTICULATE PAIN BOUNCE THROUGH ROOM

IS HORRIBLE

AFTER FEW SECONDS YOU THROW UP VIOLENTLY AND COLLAPSE TO YOUR KNEES

IT DOESN'T STOP

YOU BLACK OUT

Item Lost: Consciousness!

Item Lost: Sanity!


BEGIN FORUM GAME IN AGENCY NETWORK. NAME IT 'BAY 12 IS FORUMS'. MAKE IT SO EVERYONE IN THE AGENCY IS ACTUALLY JUST PART OF AN ONLINE FORUM

[3]YOU OPEN UP THE JANITORIAL WEB-BROWSER, START FORUM GAME

NOT MUCH INTEREST BECAUSE EVERYONE ELSE IS WORKING, UNLIKE SOME PEOPLE

STILL, COUPLE OF PEOPLE MAKE APPS




TAKE SCELLY TO MED BAY.

AVOID OBVIOUS STATEMENT.


((Maybe make it so whenever we complete a task we're assigned, we get closer to levelling up to a new position.))

[2] YOU STUMBLE AROUND BLINDLY

(BECAUSE YOU BLIND)

[3] "HAHA, WE JUST BURNT OUT OUR EYES WITH CORROSIVE LIQUID. WE'LL PROBABLY GET COMPENSATED, I THINK"

UNCLOG TAHT MOTHERFUCKER.

[1] OKAY! UHM. LET'S DO THIS

...WAIT... YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO... STICK YOUR HAND... DOWN THERE?

I, UH, OH G-GOD...

Item Lost: Consciousness!

\\Joining\\

Be somewhere else from all the mayhem atm, cleaning in another department...

[6] YOU ARE ELSEWHERE

YOU ARE VERY ELSEWHERE. INFACT, TOO MUCH ELSEWHERE

YOU AT BUS STOP MILES AWAY, LATE FOR WORK BECAUSE BUS NEVER CAME

IS RAINING

CRAP

BEGIN TO CLEAN CLEANING SUPPLIES

[3] YOU WIPE SOME FINGERPRINTS OFF A LABEL. YOU THINK. OR WAS THAT SOME LETTERS?

PRETEND TO BE GORDON FREEMAN, SMASH RATS WITH MOP

THERE ARE RATS IN THE WALLS. YOU GOING TO KILL THEM. YES.

[6] YOU PUT ON A PAIR OF FREEMAN-ESQUE GLASSES, OPEN UP THE MAINTENANCE HATCH AND CLIMB INTO A CRAWLSPACE, HURRYING ALONG LOOKING FOR RATS. WAIT. UHH.

IT'S A BIT HARD TO SEE WITH THESE PRESCRIPTION GLASSES ON. YOU RUN INTO WALL, FALL OVER.
HEAR SCUTTLING NOISES APPROACHING FROM DARKNESS. SHIT.

PRETEND TO TAKE CLEANING SUPLIES.
FOLD PAPER AIRPLANES SECRETLY.

[1] YOU GRAB A COUPLE OF BOTTLES OF DETERGENT, BLEACH AND SUCH, AS WELL AS A FEW SHEETS OF PAPER FROM THE DES-- "WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" HEAD JANITOR IS SHOUTING AT YOU
"YOU HAD BETTER NOT BE PLANNING ON FOLDING AIRPLANES WITH THOSE, YOU TRAITOROUS BASTARD! THAT STUFF'S SO FAR ABOVE YOUR CLEARANCE YOU'D GET A CRAMP IN THE NECK FROM TRYING TO LOOK AT IT!!"

Build robotic eyes out of cleaning supplies.

[2] YOU CAN'T FIND ANYTHING, REALLY. BEING BLIND DOESN'T HELP. YOU WALK INTO OTHER BLIND PERSON, EVERYONE FALLS OVER IN HALLWAY. THIS KINDA EMBARASSING.

Ask for promotion to science bloke.

[5] YOU HEAD OVER TO ADMIN DESK, SMILING CHARMING-LIKE AT ATTRACTIVE SECRETARY

"HEY LOVE, HOW ABOUT YOU GET ME A PROMOTION TO SCIENCE BLOKE?"

[2] "OH, UM... WELL... YOU'D HAVE TO FILL OUT THESE APPLICATION FORMS AND SUBMIT THEM. THE BOARD WILL LOOK OVER THEM AND REPLY WITHIN 3 TO SEVENTEEN WEEKS." SHE SEEMS ALMOST APOLOGETIC AS SHE DUMPS BIG PILE OF PAPERWORK ON DESK. DANG.

MEIN GOTT!

>VILE HOLDING ZE VOODEN END, SMASH ZE MONITORS VITH ZE MOP.

[1] YOU TWITCH SPASTICALLY ON THE FLOOR AS ELECTRICITY RUNS THROUGH YOU LIKE CURRY THROUGH AN IBS SUFFERER

MONITOR FALLS OFF TABLE ONTO YOU

MAKES JUICY *SKRRAKUNCH* SOUND

CAN'T FEEL YOU LEGS

YOU BLACK OUT, BUT NOT BEFORE CATCHING A GLIMPSE OF SOME ARMOUR-CLAD FIGURES SURROUNDING YOU AND STARTING TO DRAG YOU OFF SOMEWHERE. IS PAINFUL.

GET OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. SPY AROUND FACILITY

[4] WOW! IT'S LIKE YOU OUT OF BODY, FLOATING AROUND FACILITY

LOOK, THERE ARE SCIENCE GUYS BUILDING TOP-SECRET WEAPONS!

THERE IS JANITORIAL OFFICER SPINAL CHATTING UP A RECEPTIONIST!

THERE IS THAT GROUP OF SECURITY FOLKS DRAGGING DA_NANG OFF TOWARDS SOME BLAST DOORS MARKED WITH "KEEP OUT- LEADS TO COMMAND/O DIVISION"

ASK WHAT ARE CRITERION FOR PROMOTION.

HEAD JANITOR TOO BUSY SHOUTING AT CHEVIL, IGNORES YOU. WHAT A MEANIE.

MAYBE YOU BETTER GET TO WORK BEFORE HE SHOUTS AT YOU...?

EAT THE MOP TO IMPRESS THE BOSS AND BECOME PROMOTED TO COMMANDO DIVISION

[6] YOU RAISE THE MOP ABOVE YOU, TILT YOUR HEAD BACK AND LOWER IT DOWN, MOUTH OPENED WIDE

YOU SLIDE IT DOWN, PAST YOUR LIPS, [CENSORED] AS YOU [CENSORED]. [CENSORED] FROM [CENSORED], UNTIL MOP IS COMPLETELY EMBEDDED IN DIGESTIVE TRACT, JUST SPONGY CLOTH END PROTRUDING FROM MOUTH

HIGH-RANKING OF BOARD HAPPENED TO BE WATCHING WITH AMAZEMENT AND... AROUSAL?
COMPLIMENTS YOUR ABILITIES AT HANDLING "LONG WOODEN OBJECTS", OFFERS YOU "PROMOTION"

IT OCCURS TO YOU THAT MAYBE THIS NOT KIND OF PROMOTION YOU WANT

OH DEAR

STEAL SECRET DOCUMENTS. SELL SECRET DOCUMENTS TO RIVAL FORUM AGENCIES.

[3] YOU CREEP AROUND, DODGING OCCASIONAL BEMUSED SECURITY GUARDS AT THEIR POSTS, UNTIL YOU FIND AN UNLOCKED OFFICE... CREEPING INSIDE, YOU FIND SHOPPING LIST ON TABLE. SCORE!

GET PROMOTED BY MAKING PEOPLE IN ABOVE DIVISION SUFFER ACCIDENTS

[1] YOU LOOK AS INCONSPICIOUS AS POSSIBLE, WALKING PAST THE HEAD JANITOR AS HE SHOUTS AT SOMEONE

YOU ENTER THE PAPER-PUSHING DIVISION, AND QUICKLY SPOT ONE OF THE PAPER-PUSHERS, A DEPRESSED-LOOKING PIMPLY DUDE WITH SKIN LIKE COOKIE DOUGH, DOZING OFF AT HIS DESK

STIFLING YOUR EVIL LAUGHTER DOWN TO A SNICKER, YOU CREEP OVER THERE AND GIVE A LARGE, TEETERING PILE OF PAPERS A SHOVE, INTENDING FOR IT TO FALL AND CRUSH HIM

YOU PUSH IN MIDDLE OF STACK, CAUSES TOP HALF TO FALL ON YOU WITH LOUD CRASH INSTEAD

OUCH

Item Lost: Consciousness!

Items Gained: Lots of papercuts!


BE JANITOR. CLEAN JANITORIAL CLOSET.

[1] ((WHOAH))

YOU LOCK SELF IN CLOSET ON ACCIDENT

WHOOPS

YOU FEEL/SMELL AT LEAST ONE OTHER PERSON LOCKED IN HERE, TOO

NOT SURE IF THEY ALIVE

THIS CLOSET NOT GET USED OFTEN

FOLD THE BEST PAPER AIRPLANE EVER

YOU IGNORE THE MASTER JANITOR, STARTING TO FOLD A PIECE OF PAPER

[3] IT IS QUITE MEDIOCRE, BUT STILL RECOGNIZABLE AS PLANE. MASTER JANITOR GOES INTO RAGE, DRAWS PORTABLE VACUUM CLEANER FROM ITS HIP HOLSTER

[2] VS [1] YOU MANAGE TO DODGE HIS WILD SHOT, AND HE TRIPS OVER AND FALLS HEADFIRST INTO BUCKET OF SOAPY WATER

HE KINDA OLD

THINK HE MIGHT BE DROWNING IN THERE. KICKING HIS LEGS AND STUFF. YOU SAVE HIM...?

>APPEAR OUT OF RANDOM DOOR
WERE IN CLOSET FOR 57 YEARS
AM NOW LEGENDARY +INFINITY JANITOR
>CLEAN WHOLE BUILDING
GET PROMOTE

[2] DARK.

IT IS DARK.

LIKE ALWAYS, YOU HEAR SOUNDS FROM OUTSIDE. YOU ARE TRAPPED, EVER SINCE THAT FATEFUL DAY 57 YEARS AGO WHEN YOU TRIED TO CLEAN JANITORIAL CLOSET. EVERY MOMENT, YOU RUE THE DAY YOU DECIDED TO-- WAIT! THE DOOR, IT IS OPENING!

SOMEONE IS ABOUT TO CLEAN THE CLOSET! YOU GO TO DIVE OUT--

AND THEN THEY LOCK THEMSELVES IN, TOO, JUST AS YOU DID ALL THIS TIME AGO. DERP.

WELL, GREAT. MISERY LOVES A LITTLE COMPANY, RIGHT?
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Corai on October 17, 2012, 12:07:22 am
KILL SECURITY OFFICER AND HIDE BODY WHEN NOBODY IS LOOKING. TAKE UNIFORM AND GUN.

FIND SECRET DOCUMENTS, SELL TO RIVAL FORUM AGENCIES.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Greenstarfanatic on October 17, 2012, 12:08:27 am
GET WORKERS COMP. THEN GET UN-BLINDED.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: misko27 on October 17, 2012, 12:12:01 am
DO SOME AMAZING ACTION THAT IMPRESSES SUPERIORS. PREFERABLY DANGEROUS AND DIFFICULT. LIKE CLEANING UP ACID THAT PERIODICALLY EXPLODES, OR FEEDING VENUS FLY TRAP, OR SMACKING ANNOYING BUT VERY LARGE MAILMAN THAT NO ONE COULD SAY NO TOO.

IF PROMOTED, CHAT UP NEAREST ATTRACTIVE LAB-TECHNICIAN.
IF NOT, AND THEREFORE HEAVILY INJURED, SEEK WORKMENS COMP.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: hops on October 17, 2012, 12:14:58 am
SCREW UP SCIENCE EXPERIMENT THROUGH GHOST POWERS FOR KICKS.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: Xantalos on October 17, 2012, 12:16:06 am
CLEAN DOOR OFF. ESCAPE. CLEAN EVERYTHING. PEOPLE SO DIRTY. MUST CLEAN. CLEAN. C̛͆͂͊̍͌̿̋̑҉̧̛̣͙̠̪͓͔̰̘͓̕Ľ̴̄͋̇͑҉̰̩̩̪̟̮͔̙̜͕͔̼̬͈̦͎E̡̧̛̎̈́ͪͮ̋̑ͯ̆͜҉͎̯͙͖̠̳̲͚̥̳̼͔̖ͅͅA̷ͭ̈́͊̓̒̑ͬ̒̿̄̽ͩ̈̃͟͏̺̫̠̘̲͙̞͓̲̤͉̝̫͈̩̭̻̮N̶͚͓̯̟̻͖͉̠̏̌̉̌̏͛ͯ̐͟.̨̗̤͙̺̠̪̮͖͓̜̲̖̙̪̺̥̺͉̩ͨ̽ͦ̀̊ͨ̎ͨ̉̄͠͝ ̵̰̬͍̰̪̯̼̤͛͊ͦ̃ͧ̽̐ͥͫ̋͊ͭ͗̎̆͛́͆̔ͅͅ
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: RedWarrior0 on October 17, 2012, 12:17:03 am
CONTINUE CLEANING CLEANING SUPPLIES
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: TopHat on October 17, 2012, 10:51:54 am
Finish cleaning then get a glass of water. Whilst humming.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: da_nang on October 17, 2012, 11:02:17 am
>VEN AVAKE, EXPLAIN TO ZE OFFICERS ZAT I VAS PREVENTING FOREIGN FORUM AGENCIES FROM GAINING AKSESS TO OUR IT DATABASE. ASK FOR PROMOTION.
>IF FAILED, MEMORISE EVERYZING IN ZE COMMAND/O DIVISION AND ACTIVATE ZE EMERGENCY TEMPORAL SHIFT.
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: chevil on October 17, 2012, 02:24:52 pm
WAIT FOR THE MASTER JANITOR TO DROWN
GET PORTABLE VACUUM CLEANER
Title: Re: BAY12 IS SECRET AGENCY
Post by: LordSlowpoke on October 17, 2012, 04:36:45 pm
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I HAD SANITY

IF I KNEW I WOULD HAVE SOLD IT

IS VERY PRICEY

AWAKEN

ESTABLISH FOUNDATIONS FOR GLORIOUS TRANSPORT TYCOON THAT IS SELF