Bay 12 Games Forum
Dwarf Fortress => DF Dwarf Mode Discussion => Topic started by: Porpoisepower on February 17, 2014, 09:07:35 am
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That lever was for the baron,
and now you are barren,
When you should be making,
a masterpiece bearing
Add your own!
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Oh little dwarf upon my screen,
Cooped up like a big sardine,
In a box with your pet cat,
Someone pull the lever; SPLAT.
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A pile of stone, a wall to be;
To raise it up was ordered he.
Not from the outworld, from inside!
Oh had he listened - now he died.
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There once was a dwarf in a cave,
who many would consider brave.
With a head like a block
he went out for a sock,
his ass I won't bother to save.
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There once was a dwarf in a cave,
who many would consider brave.
With a head like a block
he went out for a sock,
his ass I won't bother to save.
LMAO
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Urist was a gatherer
He ventured to the caves
And found a fell forgotten beast
Giant, with webs, and full of rage
Urist, plump helmet in hand,
entered into trance
Took up the battle stance and charged
and stumbled into sticky strands
The beast, unfazed, swept forth a claw
Covered the cave with dwarf-bloodstains
Roared a first and second time,
And dashed out Urist's brains.
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There once was a dwarf in a cave,
who many would consider brave.
With a head like a block
he went out for a sock,
his ass I won't bother to save.
May I please sig this? It's so glorious that others must see it.
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There once was a dwarf in a cave,
who many would consider brave.
With a head like a block
he went out for a sock,
his ass I won't bother to save.
May I please sig this? It's so glorious that others must see it.
Go ahead.
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Soapmaker make me a stack
Something smelling of walrus and yak
Maybe with a touch of lilac
Be sure to decorate it with rings of slate
And some fibrous ropes I'd appreciate
to keep me from dropping it down the grate
As there is nothing quite as obnoxious
Or anywhere near as preposterous
As being buggered by a herd of colossuses
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Here there be many levers
One for the Smasher
Two for the drawbridges
Three for the nobles
Four for the floodgates
Which is which, I forgot
(Yeah I know it doesn't rhyme, but I felt it had a place here.)
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(a haiku)
Deep beneath the earth
Magma and stone, greed and steel
neurotic drunks die
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There once was a fat midget drunkard,
whose house was a hole where he hunker'd.
One day (in a flash)
he was transformed to ash
'cause a large magma pipe he had punctured.
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Urist had made a crossbow,
Of gold and iron wrought,
An artifact fit for a king,
'The Snuggling of Forts'
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Down deep where the dwarves never go,
a monstrosity paced to and fro.
A Forgotten Beast!
Expecting a feast,
he was struck down. (he was made of snow.)
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A hauler walked across the mound
As the miner removed the ground
The hauler fell through
And blew to bits too
His ghost then haunted the compound
This is a great thread.
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Ode to the Ten Miners
Urist 1 was having fun
Digging out a well
He channelled straight
But stopped too late
20 z levels he fell
Urist 2, he died too
Digging out a lignite seam
He had no fear
Of damp stone near
Now he's floating off downstream
Urist 3 fought a sea lamprey
And came off second best
Back teeth dislodged
Off the bridge she dodged
In the river she now rests
Urists 4, 5, 6, and 7
Were digging a cistern (11x11)
My focus lapsed
The cavern collapsed
And sent them up off to dwarfy heaven
Urist 8 arrived too late
To escape the goblin attack
His ghost was resentful
Things got quite eventful
Til we inscribed his name on a plaque
Urist 9 was supposed to be fine
And survive long in my fort as a miner
But into oblivion
While casting obsidian
Was her fate... we still cannot find her
So Urist the 10th, of uncommon strength
Grab your pick and whistle your work-song
Your new job ain't so rough
Just mine out this blue stuff
And relax! What could possibly go wrong?
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I gave the sword to Rovod
And I said to keep it well,
That she may learn the warrior's ways
And face invaders fell.
The sword was forged of adamant,
With blood-parched edges dread
But when at last the foe arrived,
She used her child instead.
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I gave the sword to Rovod
And I said to keep it well,
That she may learn the warrior's ways
And face invaders fell.
The sword was forged of adamant,
With blood-parched edges dread
But when at last the foe arrived,
She used her child instead.
Love it :)
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My contribution:
(Two friends stare at a computer screen in a dark room)
Friend 1: Never gets old, eh?
Friend 2: Nope.
Friend 1: Kinda makes you wanna...
Friend 2: Break into song?
Friend 1: Yup.
Singer:
I love collapses,
I love this Giant Sponge,
I love the circus,
I love this mermaid's guts,
I love Dwarf Fortress,
And all it's crazy dorfs,
Boom de yada!
Boom de yada!
Boom de yada!
Boom de yada!
I love your burning,
I love a wagon thrall,
I love Forgotten beasts,
I love Boatmurdered's fall.
I love Dwarf Fortress,
And all it's boogiemen.
Boom de yada!
Boom de yada!
Boom de yada!
Boom de yada!
I love this dragon,
I love my magma,
I love wierd artifacts,
I love this spider,
I love Dwarf Fortress,
This game is pretty cool!
Boom de yada!
Boom de yada!
Boom de yada!
Boom de yada!
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My contribution:
(snip)
I know I'm supposed to hear this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=at_f98qOGY0) but all I can hear is this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=srIIre8mvV4).
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Ok. So, uh, Mr. Whitman, and while I'm at it, Mr. Lincoln? I just want you to know, I really actually do feel bad about this. I'm genuinely a terrible person.
O Catten! My Catten! the darksome hole is dug;
The glowing pits are emptied, and the the soldiers loiter, smug;
Plump helmet roasts and sunshine toasts and children throwing parties
While stout arms lade the minecarts with a great "Heave-ho, my hearties!"
But O heart! heart! heart!
O face so pale and wan
For 'neath his pick my Catten lies
His upper body's gone.
O Catten! My Catten! 'Twere best you did not rise
This biome isn't evil, though our captured necro tries.
But would you walked, for now your name is trumpeted in glory
Your sacrifice was meet; it made a nifty fortress story.
O Catten! Dear Miner!
Bedecked with cabochon
Your monument is honored, but
Your upper body's gone.
My Catten does not answer, his braided beard is still;
I have not found his lower leg, and fear I never will;
The pick with which the tube he pierced, and victory presaged
We'll place within his tomb, soon as a hauler can be paged.
Exult, O dwarves, and fill the halls!
But I this denoument
Shall memorize, as Catten lies:
His upper body's gone.
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My contribution:
(snip)
Where's the mention to hot magma?
Nonetheless, someone somewhere needs to sing this.
As for me... here's my take on the man from Nantucket. As I can't make Nantucket in Dwarf, the closest I got was Nantunkethil (I read it nan-tun-ket-hill), which translates to "The Unnameable Door-Principle"
There once was a dwarf from Nantunkethil
Who kept his head inside a bucket.
But his daughter, named Nan,
Fell pray to a boogieman
And as for the bucket, Nantunkethil.
But the daughter, intents malign
To a Necromancer was brought in shine.
And as she wake
From the master she take
A waterskin of Sunshine
The wrench with force sublime
The master's head bit off in time
From a pocket a book drops
That puts the wrench in tops
The book was full of grime
The daughter returns to Nantunkethil
Where a dwarf kept his head inside a bucket
From the grimy book's strife
Puts the dwarf's head to life
And as for the bucket, Nantunkethil.
Daughter and father reunite
Until a siege beckons fight
The heads of goblins are bit off
Until one begins to scoff
That the husks he smote in fright
In her final bed the daughter lies
Uttering words between cries
This is one lousy pun
But Losing is Fun
And this ode finally dies.
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My contribution:
(snip)
I know I'm supposed to hear this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=at_f98qOGY0) but all I can hear is this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=srIIre8mvV4).
THIS
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My contribution:
(snip)
Where's the mention to of hot magma?
EDIT: Added to original post.
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Ode to Urist
I remember when I first saw Urist,
Whose ASCII tile's smile was the purest,
He worked hard and strong under Sunshine's song,
A work that lasts as long as lifelong.
I remember when I never saw Urist,
To sell to our elf-eared tourists,
The depot was dwarfless and Urist was gone,
Eating minced sugar and pig tail spawn.
I remember when I last saw Urist,
In the caverns he fell I'm surest,
His crossbow he'd draw into the badger fiend's maw,
Yet still he would fall to the floor.
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A foolish young elf in a caravan
Says, "Sell me wood? You BARBARIAN!"
In rage, the dwarf shouts,
"Pull the lever, you louts!
We'll see how he likes our obsidian!"
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The Dwarves of olden times were dead,
He’d slept for years beyond the count.
When Urist first raised up his head
He rose to mine his stony mount.
The Toad, the Three toed man and all,
Were there to wish him fairest well;
They grinned and laughed upon his death
And sneered about his new-built hall,
He mined the depths and fought all hell
And in his stores he hoarded wealth.
Oh Urist never got a chance,
His fate was worse than ours,
He lived inside a wormy hole;
His life, it spanned no more than hours.