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Dwarf Fortress => DF Dwarf Mode Discussion => Topic started by: valcon on March 26, 2008, 12:04:00 pm

Title: Meowschwitz
Post by: valcon on March 26, 2008, 12:04:00 pm
SO I noticed a chain of "has given birth to a litter of kittens", and I formulated a "final solution" if you will.

Is it just me, or do kittens make the finest bolts?  I hate practicing with forged bolts ... so, 65 kittens in the butcher shop and my fort is stocked for life!

[ March 26, 2008: Message edited by: valcon ]

Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: grelphy on March 26, 2008, 12:14:00 pm
Bone bolts kind of suck, actually. (There's a reason dwarves only use them and wood for practice.)

Kitten leather mittens, on the other hand, are rumored to be staggeringly soft, fluffy and comfortable...

Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Cthulhu on March 26, 2008, 12:18:00 pm
And kinky.
Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Tigerbunny on March 26, 2008, 12:45:00 pm
you can even make soap out of em.
Nothing feels better after a fourteenhour miningshift than grooming your facial hear with Zod Koganotils Beardconditioner and a nice bath with bubbles.
Now new with the flavours cave lobster, rock nut and slivery barb!

Ideal for long tradecaravans! Buy now and get a schistidol for free!

...I should play less

Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Benitosimies on March 26, 2008, 02:33:00 pm
This is a masterfully designed gabbro grate. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It menaces with spikes of cat leather and red spinel. On the grate is an image of a dwarf and dwarves. The dwarf is surrounded by the dwarves.
Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: atomicoctobot on March 26, 2008, 05:35:00 pm
See this hat, 'twas my cat,
My evening wear - vampire bat,
These white slippers are albino
African endangered rhino.
Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: BurnedToast on March 26, 2008, 06:00:00 pm
quote:
Originally posted by grelphy:
<STRONG>Bone bolts kind of suck, actually. (There's a reason dwarves only use them and wood for practice.)

Kitten leather mittens, on the other hand, are rumored to be staggeringly soft, fluffy and comfortable...</STRONG>


Actually masterwork bone bolts (easy to get a legendary bonecarver) do just as much damage as regular iron bolts (what the goblins use and everyone complains about that) AND they have a better chance to hit thanks to being masterwork (I think). They can also come in bigger stacks, metal is limited to 25 but bone comes in stacks of 5 times the bones used, so you can get some really huge stacks from say elephants dragons or demons.

Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: AlienChickenPie on March 26, 2008, 06:58:00 pm
Has anyone tried subsisting entirely on cat products? No agriculture, hunting or plant gathering, just cats. That could be a nice challenge, especially if you don't cage them.
Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Mr.Person on March 26, 2008, 08:36:00 pm
quote:
Originally posted by AlienChickenPie:
<STRONG>Has anyone tried subsisting entirely on cat products? No agriculture, hunting or plant gathering, just cats. That could be a nice challenge, especially if you don't cage them.</STRONG>

They early game would be hell and you would need a NASA supercomputer, but yeah, that sounds like a good challenge.

Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Hypcso on March 26, 2008, 09:27:00 pm
Good luck with that, once you get a dwarf that likes cats he/she will be adopted by every cat in the fortress, and then you can't butcher them.
Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: pushy on March 26, 2008, 10:48:00 pm
quote:
Originally posted by Hypcso:
<STRONG>Good luck with that, once you get a dwarf that likes cats he/she will be adopted by every cat in the fortress, and then you can't butcher them.</STRONG>
Ergo if any migrant likes cats, they have a little visit to that room with the leaky ceiling  :p
Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Garnan on March 26, 2008, 11:04:00 pm
quote:
Originally posted by atomicoctobot:
<STRONG>See this hat, 'twas my cat,
My evening wear - vampire bat,
These white slippers are albino
African endangered rhino.</STRONG>

In reply to atomicoctobot:
See my loafers,
Former gophers,
It was that or skin my chauffeurs.

In reply to the rest of the thread:
This game really does encourage sadistic play, doesn't it?

Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Khosan on March 26, 2008, 11:09:00 pm
You could do it with dogs too.  A bit easier too, since there's no chance of the dogs getting adopted while you're not paying attention.

I think problems would arise once the population gets to about...50 Dwarves.  You'd need like...200 dogs to keep the meat rolling in.

Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Earthquake Damage on March 27, 2008, 02:19:00 am
Q:  Why does everyone hate cats?

Their population seems to naturally stabilize after a few years (somewhere in the 50-100 range I think), they make vermin a non-issue, and they generally stay out of the way (with the exception that the one cat-lover they all adopt gets swarmed -- but you can give that bastard a cozy desk job so he stays out of everyone's way).  They occasionally block doors with dead vermin or upset their owners on death, but aside from that they're rarely a nuisance IMO.

I'm not really sure what makes them so obnoxious in so many forts.

Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: pushy on March 27, 2008, 02:51:00 am
quote:
Originally posted by Garnan:
<STRONG>

In reply to atomicoctobot:
See my loafers,
Former gophers,
It was that or skin my chauffeurs.</STRONG>


You missed a bit  :D

quote:
Q: Why does everyone hate cats?
Several reasons. The adoption is the main thing for me. If you're playing a long-term game and the game begins to lag a few years in, one way to quickly relieve some of the strain is to kill or imprison stray pets...but you can't do either of these with pets, and so it can be a real nuisance watching 100 cats/kittens running around your fortress, knowing that they're killing the speed of your game and short of killing their owner (who is probably a legendary worker and not someone you'd particularly want to sacrifice), there's bugger all you can do about the damn things.
Removing the [verminhunter] tag in the raws would solve this, of course, but then cats would lose their usefulness...so I keep a breeding couple, keep any pets brought by migrants, and let those few cats run around killing the pesky fire snakes and fluffy wamblers, and I just kill their babies the second I see a message saying that some kittens have been born.
Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Footkerchief on March 27, 2008, 04:32:00 am
quote:
Originally posted by Earthquake Damage:
<STRONG>Q:  Why does everyone hate cats?

Their population seems to naturally stabilize after a few years (somewhere in the 50-100 range I think)</STRONG>


There's your answer.

Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Asehujiko on March 27, 2008, 06:10:00 am
They are useful in massive numbers. About 90 or so can zerg a hydra/titan to death, loosing about 75% of their own in the process but they are expendable anyway. Don't attemp this on dragons or colosus, the first will fry them all immediatly, the latter doesn't become tired
Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: ZedEh on March 27, 2008, 06:48:00 am
"Nine-headed hydra interrupts eat miner -- zerged by kittens."

Awesome.

Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Earthquake Damage on March 27, 2008, 10:38:00 am
quote:
Originally posted by ZedEh:
<STRONG>"Nine-headed hydra interrupts eat miner -- zerged by kittens."</STRONG>

Kekeke :3

Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Dae on March 27, 2008, 01:58:00 pm
I'll always remember my very first fortress : for an enemy, entering its walls meant being plummed to death by a Dog Hell Squad of Doom. 230 dogs. In a one tile wide corridor.
Now I'm more counting on cows.
Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Alfador on March 27, 2008, 03:38:00 pm
Kitten rush!
Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Forumsdwarf on March 27, 2008, 06:19:00 pm
I can just imagine plotting a build order for a kitten rush:

"By 2:25 your first kitten will have spawned and your second litterbox should be about halfway completed ..."

Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Toaster on March 27, 2008, 07:26:00 pm
http://www.wayodd.com/funny-pictures2/funny-pictures-kittens-blow-up-a-city-zGK.jpg
Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: GRead on March 27, 2008, 08:59:00 pm
Why do I hate cats?

I hate cats *because* they kill vermin.
they kill vermin and then they don't eat them.
So all of my dwarves, busy as they are, have to stop what they're doing to drag dead rats outside so they don't turn into miasma.
Of course, because my dwarves are so busy, they never actually get to taking the dead thing out until it's started rotting.
So I've got the double whammy of having to take the bloody thing out of the fort which is yet another hauling job, and my dwarves get disgusted by miasma anyway.

Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Mulch Diggums on March 28, 2008, 05:14:00 am
Any normal fortress has 20 to 30 useless haulers that are used for such things. Any usefull dwarves should have cleaning removed
Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Forumsdwarf on March 28, 2008, 02:12:00 pm
Dedicated haulers complain about unemployment.

My preference is everybody works, everybody hauls, with two time-sensitive exceptions:
Farmers get food hauling only.  Crops have to be brought in before they wilt.
Butcher / Fish Cleaner / Tanners get animal hauling only.  Animals must be slaughtered, cleaned, and tanned before they rot.  I combine these 3 tasks so I only need 1-2 workers -- you'll never employ a fish cleaner or tanner full-time, and butchering jobs are directly managed by the player.

With universal hauling you can balance your intermediate product inventories by shutting down hauling temporarily on tasks that are falling behind.  Conversely workers in tasks that are "caught up" will do more hauling.  (Dyers, plant processors, and millers work fast, and there are seasonal variations in workload.)

Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Derakon on March 28, 2008, 02:26:00 pm
I turn off hauling for dedicated workers, since it leads to gross inefficiencies. Your miner's off on the strip-mining level, carving away at a stone block, and when he finishes, oop, it's time to take that bucket down in the living quarters back to the stockpile. Then, that job completed, he walks back to the mining level, carves out another block, and now it's time to take those hydra chunks[20] to the outdoor refuse pile...

Basically, having hauling on means that dwarves spend a lot of time walking back and forth and very little producing anything useful. This is fine for peasants who can't produce anything useful anyway, but it seriously slows down your productivity for your specialists.

Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Jurassiced on March 28, 2008, 02:31:00 pm
quote:
Originally posted by atomicoctobot:
<STRONG>See this hat, 'twas my cat,
My evening wear - vampire bat,
These white slippers are albino
African endangered rhino.</STRONG>

simpsons hell yesh =P

Title: Re: Meowschwitz
Post by: Forumsdwarf on March 28, 2008, 02:34:00 pm
Gah!  Miners and woodcutters, forgot about those guys!  No hauling, for the reason you stated.  Miners and woodcutters travel far afield; when they haul they'll spend most of their workday walking to and from job sites.

No hauling for miners, woodcutters, farmers, and animal processors.  Did I miss anyone?