Bay 12 Games Forum

Finally... => General Discussion => Topic started by: Scoops Novel on July 27, 2022, 11:59:30 am

Title: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on July 27, 2022, 11:59:30 am
How would you run it?
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: TamerVirus on July 27, 2022, 12:31:43 pm
I'd make a spiral fractal dungeon that folds in on itself forever. Then I'd put some kobolds and a door mimic
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on July 27, 2022, 12:56:40 pm
Quote from: TamerVirus on July 27, 2022, 12:31:43 pm
I'd make a spiral fractal dungeon that folds in on itself forever.

Do you have any idea how much that COSTS?

Quote from: TamerVirus on July 27, 2022, 12:31:43 pm
Then I'd put some kobolds and a door mimic

Spoiler: You (click to show/hide)

Eh...

I know there's the famous example of Tucker's Kobolds (https://dungeons.fandom.com/wiki/DnDWiki:Tucker%27s_kobolds), but those cutthroats are as likely to take over as actually work for us.

The door mimic probably works 50% of the time though.

How about a actual loose cannon, on wheels, for the intimidation factor.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: EuchreJack on July 27, 2022, 01:30:51 pm
1) Steal Laptop of Scoops Novel
2) Change the password
3) Place new password in the center of the dungeon
4) Make taunting post directed at Scoops Novel
???
Profit!

...I think this counts as adding a Loose Cannon to the dungeon.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Starver on July 27, 2022, 05:37:35 pm
I wouldn't want us to have anything fancy. Just something quite modest (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ch%C3%A2teau_de_Br%C3%A9z%C3%A9)...
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: TD1 on July 27, 2022, 05:48:53 pm
This is reminding me of that time we were gonna buy an island in Canada.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on July 27, 2022, 06:12:21 pm
Quote from: Starver on July 27, 2022, 05:37:35 pm
I wouldn't want us to have anything fancy. Just something quite modest (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ch%C3%A2teau_de_Br%C3%A9z%C3%A9)...

"12th-century troglodytic basement"

We can probably afford that bit
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Starver on July 27, 2022, 07:50:18 pm
((Seriously (...well, 'upper-forum' seriously...) when I saw that place I realised that they'd already done pretty much IRL like I almost always tend to do with my own forts, these days. Except that I roof over the outer courtyards, as well, to prevent flying enemies.))
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: None on July 27, 2022, 07:56:12 pm
bowl o' rubbers at the door, for starters
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on July 27, 2022, 08:15:44 pm
Quote from: TamerVirus on July 27, 2022, 12:31:43 pm
I'd make a spiral fractal dungeon that folds in on itself forever. Then I'd put some kobolds and a door mimic

Quote from: None on July 27, 2022, 07:56:12 pm
bowl o' rubbers at the door, for starters

Quote from: None on July 27, 2022, 07:56:12 pm
rubbers

Quote from: TamerVirus on July 27, 2022, 12:31:43 pm
mimic

Does anyone else see a problem with this.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: King Zultan on July 28, 2022, 01:30:27 am
The door mimic will steal the rubbers?
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on July 28, 2022, 06:33:24 am
You're putting squeaky doors in a whole new light.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Egan_BW on July 28, 2022, 07:08:50 am
B1 is just a huge layer of explosive fertilizer, B2 is a bigass steel plate, B3 is the actual lair which is just a cozy basement. When invaders appear you set off the fertilizer and they're deleted.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on July 28, 2022, 10:49:09 am
But what about the feds?
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: TamerVirus on July 28, 2022, 11:05:55 am
Quote from: Scoops Novel on July 28, 2022, 10:49:09 am
But what about the feds?
They'll just arrest the mimic
This leads to a whole 'mimic must escape from high security prison' plotline that's only available if you have the DLC
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on July 28, 2022, 11:51:14 am
You're telling me we should pay for a condom-stealing blast proof door mimic. And for DLC?
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: None on July 28, 2022, 11:52:10 am
blast-proof rubbers
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: TamerVirus on July 28, 2022, 12:10:51 pm
You should only get the DLC if you're invested in the storyline involving the mimic
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on July 28, 2022, 12:13:30 pm
I'm invested
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Egan_BW on July 28, 2022, 01:25:54 pm
Quote from: Scoops Novel on July 28, 2022, 10:49:09 am
But what about the feds?
I already told you the strategy for invaders, pay attention.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: EuchreJack on July 28, 2022, 04:31:53 pm
Quote from: None on July 28, 2022, 11:52:10 am
blast-proof rubbers

...I hope the rubbers are blast-proof. That is one DLC worth purchasing!
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Magmacube_tr on July 28, 2022, 05:26:30 pm
I know the locations of many subterranean lava tube complexes from my endless escape from the feds, so no money spent on excavating. Most tunnels are airless and incredibly hot though.  Many of 'em are unavailable if you guys are picky.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on July 28, 2022, 05:44:33 pm
Every time we blow up the tunnel we'll need to clean up the lava. Does anyone know something affordable that eats lava?
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Magmacube_tr on July 28, 2022, 05:49:33 pm
There are lava tube complexes of extinct volcanoes, you could try that. No lava present. But the thing is that older a complex is, more fragmented and inaccesible it is from millenia of caveins.

So both choices are have their ups and downs.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: King Zultan on July 29, 2022, 01:46:44 am
No need to eat the lava if we just ignore it and let the lava do it's thing.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Starver on July 29, 2022, 03:29:07 am
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lava_bread

Yes, I know you'll be redirected...
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on July 29, 2022, 09:56:41 am
Spoiler: Starting to take shape (click to show/hide)

Underground lava tube complex, rigged explosion and a reset mechanism. Sounds like we need fire elementals as minions.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: King Zultan on July 30, 2022, 01:00:53 am
We could just set the door mimic on fire and pretend it's a fire elemental, it'll probably burn better after it steals all the rubbers.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on July 30, 2022, 08:34:35 am
... Fair enough. Ok, so after the explosion trips, and the titanium door mimic starts cleaning up the spilled lava and rubble and so on, who guards the door?
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: TamerVirus on July 30, 2022, 11:45:52 am
You, obviously
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on July 30, 2022, 12:58:17 pm
You're the virus, you could at least infect intruders.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: King Zultan on July 31, 2022, 01:21:26 am
Why don't we have door mimic guard the door mimic?
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on July 31, 2022, 03:41:54 am
We don't have enough condoms for that. In fact, we're probably encouraging them.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: King Zultan on July 31, 2022, 03:50:27 am
We must acquire additional condoms!


Also if we encourage the door mimics we can create an army of them.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Starver on July 31, 2022, 04:11:36 am
Imagine the door on door action...
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on July 31, 2022, 04:29:31 am
Sorry guys, the markets already been cornered. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6h58uT_BGV4)
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Loud Whispers on August 10, 2022, 05:37:31 am
I'd make a shitty corporate dungeon where the walls are endless thin dividers and the minions are terrified underpaid kobolds, depressed skeletons who keep going through the motions of work without accomplishing any work, and four devils in suits, skirts and ties who somehow devour 99% of minion salary. That way the low-budget would work in my favour and the overseers could find ways to generate revenue by forcing all the kobolds to grind for Gacha loot to be resold at reasonable prices. It would also give heroes motivation to raid the dungeon lair at a low low cost, as giving them actual treasure sounds expensive, so I can just give them virtual treasure instead
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on August 10, 2022, 08:39:13 pm
I demand better standards of villainy.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: King Zultan on August 11, 2022, 01:02:34 am
But better standards cost to much money, gotta keep expenses down and profits high!
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on August 11, 2022, 07:51:21 am
I thought we were re-investing everything.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: TamerVirus on August 11, 2022, 09:38:00 am
I thought we were doing a stock buyback
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: TD1 on August 11, 2022, 10:16:13 am
Quote from: King Zultan on July 31, 2022, 03:50:27 am
We must acquire additional condoms!

Otherwise you'll get an STD?

(Sexually transmitted door)
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Loud Whispers on August 11, 2022, 06:34:33 pm
Quote from: TamerVirus on August 11, 2022, 09:38:00 am
I thought we were doing a stock buyback
Naturally that is a top priority for any Chief Evil Officer, lest your dungeon become vulnerable to corporate raids from adventurers
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on August 12, 2022, 12:03:41 am
Quote from: Loud Whispers on August 11, 2022, 06:34:33 pm
Chief Evil Officer

No no no. Your terminology's all wrong. We say "Warlord" here.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: EuchreJack on August 12, 2022, 12:45:31 am
Apparently, the "adventurers" actually work for OSHA...
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: King Zultan on August 12, 2022, 01:20:28 am
OSHA officials are the worst thing that could happen to a dungeon or dwarven fort.

Quote from: Th4DwArfY1 on August 11, 2022, 10:16:13 am
Quote from: King Zultan on July 31, 2022, 03:50:27 am
We must acquire additional condoms!

Otherwise you'll get an STD?

(Sexually transmitted door)
Especially those, as they are worst kind of STD.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: TD1 on August 12, 2022, 05:16:07 am
You're forgetting Siege Transmitted Dwarf.

That's an STD to fear.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Magmacube_tr on August 12, 2022, 05:34:46 pm
Quote from: Th4DwArfY1 on August 12, 2022, 05:16:07 am
You're forgetting Siege Transmitted Dwarf.

That's an STD to fear.

Man, should've used protective armor, now there are dwarves on me.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: TD1 on August 12, 2022, 05:53:50 pm
"Yea but dude it's your own fault. You delved too greedily and too deep. What did you think you'd find down there?"

My aptitude for crude innuendo disturbs me.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: King Zultan on August 13, 2022, 04:10:56 am
Quote from: Th4DwArfY1 on August 12, 2022, 05:16:07 am
You're forgetting Siege Transmitted Dwarf.
I don't think there are enough condoms in the world to protect you from that.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on August 13, 2022, 08:21:13 am
Quote from: Th4DwArfY1 on August 12, 2022, 05:53:50 pm
My aptitude for crude innuendo disturbs me.

See where it takes you.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Loud Whispers on September 08, 2022, 05:41:17 pm
Quote from: Scoops Novel on August 13, 2022, 08:21:13 am
See where it takes you.
A trojan horse full of Greeks taking you from behind?
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: TD1 on September 14, 2022, 02:40:08 pm
I mean what else would a horse full of Greek seamen do?
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Loud Whispers on September 14, 2022, 02:49:49 pm
Quote from: Th4DwArfY1 on September 14, 2022, 02:40:08 pm
I mean what else would a horse full of Greek seamen do?
Set sail for Ithaca!
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: TD1 on September 15, 2022, 04:49:53 am
Doesn't end well.

https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/45392/ulysses
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: A_Curious_Cat on September 15, 2022, 01:24:04 pm
Quote from: TamerVirus on July 27, 2022, 12:31:43 pm
I'd make a spiral fractal dungeon that folds in on itself forever. Then I'd put some kobolds and a door mimic

I’m not sure why, but this seems oddly familiar…
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on September 16, 2022, 10:48:28 pm
Memories of dungeons gone
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: King Zultan on September 17, 2022, 01:46:11 am
Nostalgia dungeon, come get killed by your fondest memories! 
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on September 17, 2022, 07:19:58 am
(https://imagesvc.meredithcorp.io/v3/mm/gif?url=https%3A%2F%2Fstatic.onecms.io%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2Fsites%2F6%2F2019%2F09%2Fgiphy-3.gif)
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Loud Whispers on October 03, 2022, 04:43:39 am
"Society grows prosperous when old men kill trees they planted and then kill themselves too. Then we stand in the glare of the sun on the graves they dug, before digging our own"
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Magmacube_tr on October 04, 2022, 07:19:34 am
Quote from: Loud Whispers on October 03, 2022, 04:43:39 am
"Society grows prosperous when old men kill trees they planted and then kill themselves too. Then we stand in the glare of the sun on the graves they dug, before digging our own"

Human civilisation in a shellnut.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Loud Whispers on October 04, 2022, 05:59:23 pm
Quote from: Magmacube_tr on October 04, 2022, 07:19:34 am
Human civilisation in a shellnut.
I pine for more
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Scoops Novel on October 04, 2022, 06:39:54 pm
We haven't tried barbarism in a while.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: King Zultan on October 05, 2022, 01:23:23 am
But what if we don't want to be barbers?
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Loud Whispers on October 05, 2022, 06:13:00 am
Quote from: King Zultan on October 05, 2022, 01:23:23 am
But what if we don't want to be barbers?
Then I'm worried you won't make the cut
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Magmacube_tr on October 05, 2022, 09:05:12 am
Alright, this is not Tumblr, stop with the pun chain.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Loud Whispers on October 05, 2022, 11:17:37 am
bay12 puns predate tumblr puns
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Magmacube_tr on October 05, 2022, 12:11:24 pm
Quote from: Loud Whispers on October 05, 2022, 11:17:37 am
bay12 puns predate tumblr puns

Oh yeah. This place is older than Tumblr, by a wide margin.
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: Starver on October 05, 2022, 02:50:29 pm
(A veritable institution, pun-chains. Pre-Tumbler, pre-Bay12, pre-web even. And very probably pre-Internet too, but I can't attest personally to that. Though I can imagine telegraph operators sending fish-puns down the wires or postal correspondants sneaking cheeses into their missives, betwixt the acrostics.)
Title: Re: If Bay12 had a Small, Low-budget Dungeon Lair
Post by: King Zultan on October 06, 2022, 01:56:01 am
Puns are an important part of Bay12, with out puns we would surly parish!