Bay 12 Games Forum
Finally... => Forum Games and Roleplaying => Roll To Dodge => Topic started by: Boksi on August 26, 2008, 05:59:59 pm
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Yes, it's another Roll To Dodge. considering how speed downgrades quality and vice versa, the high quality games are rather slow. I don't think it's that bad, really.
But to recap the rules:
The game is based upon randomness. You post one action, and one only. Silliness is often encouraged, although not quite as much in this thread as the others. When all players have posted their action, I will go over them, and determine their success with a roll of a six-sided dice. Higher numbers are higher grades of success, so let's try an example:
Action
"I pick my nose"
1 - Epic fail. You not only fail, you fail disastrously.
"You ram your finger through your nose and into your brain. You have frontal brain damage(-1 to willpower)."
2 - Failure.
"You accidentally hit your eye instead of your nose."
3 - Sort of success. It's not quite good, but hey, it still works.
"You pick your nose. Some mucus gets stuck on your finger and no matter how hard you shake your hand it won't come off."
4 - Success.
"You pick your nose."
5 - Great success. A very well executed action.
"You expertly pick your nose. It's very clean now."
6 - Overshoot. You went a bit too far.
"You pick your nose with such force that they are now devoid of anything, including those thingies that let you smell stuff."
The goal here, unlike the other RTDs, is to escape, not to be the last man standing. Don't worry, you'll cause plenty of havoc anyway. And if you're the only one alive, the escape is all the sweeter.
This RTD is set in a high fantasy setting, and I will be quite lenient with minor magical powers; making sparks appear at your fingertips doesn't require anything. Hurling fireballs might require you to spend a turn meditating on fire, or finding some magical artifact. Really powerful stuff like setting everyone in a hundred meter radius on fire will require artifacts and meditation both, probably with a 5 for the full specified effect.
Anyway, I think that's all. On with the game:
You wake up, drowsy, stark naked and with a mild hangover. You are located in some sort of room along with fourteen other groaning bodies, all in a similar condition to you. As you get up, you notice six things about this room:
1: It's a hemisphere made out of smooth rock.
2: Torches line the wall.
3: Right in front of you is a massive steel gate.
4: Diagonally to the right from you is a pile of armor and weapons. They look light and sharp, if somewhat frail.
5: Diagonally left is another pile of armor and weapons. They look heavy and durable.
6: The floor is made of cobblestones. Each of them has a red three painted on them.
I'll let you pick some armor and a weapon as a single action, so long as it's from the same pile, and wield them as another single action. They still have separate rolls
Gentlemen. Let the rolling begin.
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I pick up a heavy sword and some heavy armour.
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I twitch a little upon looking about this strange new place, wonder what I had been drinking last night and then get up, crack my knuckles and go over to the pile of light equipment. I then, of course, grab some weaponry and armor.
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Oh yeah, and I should probably limit the number of players.
15. If I do not reach that number before 00:00, 28th August, I will also begin the game, but I don't think that will be necessary.
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Think I could join? :o
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I go over to the durable armour and pick it up.
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I crawl over to the pile of heavy and durable stuff and grab some armor and weapons.
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Yes Mulch, you can join. No restrictions besides the player limit.
List:
sjmarshy
Xotes
lambskin
Devath
PTTG
Zako
Mulch Diggums
EDIT: Also, everyone is being very hasty, don't you think? Don't worry, the piles aren't trapped or anything. It's just that this place is designed to benefit those who are cautious.
EDIT2: To be honest, I wouldn't kick you out, really. I'd just increase the player limit to 16. I can do that, you know.
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I would like to take seat number 15; If you run out of space, feel free to kick me (out of the game).
I attempt to collect some light armor; I don't risk trying my luck with a pointy thing.
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Also, you might wanna edit the opening post room description. It won't really make any sense once we get past 10 people.
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Can I join? Im in the mood for random.
I pick up some durable armor and a weapon that I know how to use. From the same pile of course.
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Alright well I join. I sit down and try to atain matrix like reflex and agility by meditating
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Hasty pasty... I'll be cautious later.
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Hmm. Just what level of power do we have right now? As in, does an action "I use powers of divination to locate and obtain a Psi-Controller's Combat Interface Suit" auto-fail for reasons other than the target item being unknown to the general public?
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Yes. That, and it sounds sci-fi-ish, not high fantasy(though I could be mistaken).
You can spend a turn attempting to obtain powers of divination though, which would allow you to search for powerful items; either as spells(meaning you don't pick the item in question up), or as a natural bonus.
EDIT: Possession rules:
Ghost can possess things. They can possess inanimate objects, but only provided they could move them when they were alive; they sort of are moving them when possessing those things. This requires a possession roll. When possessing living beings, it's a different matter. You need to succeed on a possession roll like every other possession, but you have a -1 penalty unless you're especially prepared. If the creature is intelligent enough to resist, they may do so. Every turn. To regain control for a turn, you need a success. This is a free action. If you have control, you may attempt to evict the other spirit; this is not a free action, and is only taken after the other spirit's regain control roll. It cannot be done if you've just regained control, but in the turn after that. Ghosts can also possess a bodypart. This means a -1 penalty but not resistance each turn unless the victim purposefully tries to resist the ghost, which isn't a free action.
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I meditate on the power of life itself in order to gain the power to drant it at will, life that is.
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Ooh, looks like there is space.
I grab light armor and a light mace. You didn't specify which weapons are available, so I opt for something non-pointy and can double as a wand in a snap.
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I don't see 15 yet ;D
I stumble over to the weapons and get the biggest sword I can find.
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I'd like to join.
I walk over to the light armor and sit down next to it, not touching anything.
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I get a weapon along with shield, and full armor.
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Well, it could be high fantasy if it was "high" fantasy, if you know what I mean.
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There's a spot left, right?
I get up and practice my mixed martial arts form.
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The Combat Interface is... yeah, probably sci-fi enough not to count as fantasy, however "high". :P It does stuff reminiscent of magic, but does it through technology.
Alright, if there's a spot left, I join in. I wake up, concentrate, and focus my will on the art of conjuration, attempting to obtain powers granted by it.
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Is there space for me?
I Grab a set of steel plate and A two handed battleaxe
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List:
1. sjmarshy
2. Xotes
3. lambskin
4. Devath
5. PTTG
6. Zako
7. Mulch Diggums
8. Ioric Kittencuddler
9. Duke 2.0
10. yougiedeggs
11. Emepror_Jonathan
12. Kyselina
13. Frelock
14. Sean Mirrsen
15. Kashyyk
No spots left!
@Devath: I see what you mean, and yes, that's a great kind of setting. But this game are serious business.
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Darn! So close :D (Maybe next time i can made it)
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Maybe next, time, yes. Good luck. Rooster. You're gonna, need, it.
Anyway:
PLAYER ACTIONS:
I pick up a heavy sword and some heavy armour.
6: You pick up an enormous mithril Zweihander. It's very heavy; if it had been made of steel you wouldn't have been able to lift it. It's overall look is that of evil, and it's hilt has a large gem set in it that seems almost alive. +2 to melee damage.
4: You pick up a set of decent-looking, if a bit blood-stained armor that will probably fit you well. +1 to block.
I twitch a little upon looking about this strange new place, wonder what I had been drinking last night and then get up, crack my knuckles and go over to the pile of light equipment. I then, of course, grab some weaponry and armor.
5: You pick up two shortswords. You can use them both offensively(-1 to hit but two hits), use one for offense and one for defense(+1 to parrying), or use both for defense(+1 to parrying, two parrying attempts). You can switch styles as a free action at the beginning of your turn.
2: You stare at the armor for a while. You simply can't decide what looks best.
I go over to the durable armour and pick it up.
5: You pick out some choice armor pieces. They'll fit you and look well-made. +1 to block.
I crawl over to the pile of heavy and durable stuff and grab some armor and weapons.
5: You pick out some heavy armor. It looks protective. +1 to block.
5: You pick out a nice-looking glaive-guisarme; +1 to melee damage and no chance of counterattacks.
I attempt to collect some light armor; I don't risk trying my luck with a pointy thing.
2: You walk towards the pile, then trip and fall flat on your face. Nothing else happens.
I pick up some durable armor and a weapon that I know how to use. From the same pile of course.
3: You pick out some leather armor. It's rather ill-fitting, both for you and each other. It's still somewhat protective. +1 to dodge.
6: You pick up a deadly-looking stiletto. You can feel death emanating from it's blade; it's a great weapon. +2 to hit(uh-oh).
Alright well I join. I sit down and try to atain matrix like reflex and agility by meditating
2: You sit down and attempt to realize your true potential. You do, but it's not that impressive. In fact, you suck.
I meditate on the power of life itself in order to gain the power to drant it at will, life that is.
4: I assume you meant grant when you wrote drant? You meditate on life in it's myriad forms, and manage to goad Death into a bargain. You can now cast "resurrection". It requires that you sacrifice another living being. You can use smaller ones though, like mice. You can resurrect souls into their original bodies, healing them completely, or some other item you've found or made. You cannot resurrect things that already have a spirit in them.
I grab light armor and a light mace. You didn't specify which weapons are available, so I opt for something non-pointy and can double as a wand in a snap.
1: You walk towards the pile of weapons. Right before you reach it, you trip over an uneven cobblestone and fall onto the pile.
MASSIVE DAMAGE AVOIDANCE ROLL:
3: You suffer some scrapes and bruises and a rather nasty cut on your left cheek, but nothing life-threatening.
I stumble over to the weapons and get the biggest sword I can find.
2: You trip over your own feet.
I walk over to the light armor and sit down next to it, not touching anything.
6: You sit down next to the light armor. And then don't do anything. In fact, you manage to completely cease all vital functions without harm for a short while(a long while would still cause problems).
I get a weapon along with shield, and full armor.
4: You pick up a flail. It looks nice and painful. +1 to damage.
5: You pick out a strong looking shield and some impressive armor. +2 to block.
I get up and practice my mixed martial arts form.
5: You feel warmed up and ready to go kick some ass. And for that matter, pound any part of a living creature into a thin paste. +1 to hit.
I wake up, concentrate, and focus my will on the art of conjuration, attempting to obtain powers granted by it.
3: You make headway into the art of summoning. You can probably summon something like a few giant rats into existence for a short while.
I Grab a set of steel plate and A two handed battleaxe
4: You grab some heavy armor. +1 to block.
4: You pick out a sharp and large axe. It looks like it could lop of limbs easily. +1 to melee damage.
NPC ACTIONS:
Suddenly, the ground shifts! The cobblestones flip over!
NOT-FALLING-ON-FACE ROLL!
sjmarshy
2: You fall flat on your face like an idiot. Your nose is bleeding.
Xotes
6: The cobblestones are scared of you. They're to afraid to move. You're mean :(
lambskin
5: With a graceful leap, you maintain your balance perfectly.
Devath
3: You stumble a bit but don't fall.
PTTG
AUTOSUCCEED. You were already flat on the ground, you just roll a bit.
Zako
3: Your hands hit the wall in time to prevent you from falling. You still look somewhat pathetic.
Mulch Diggums
AUTOSUCCEED. You were already sitting. You fall, but not badly. It's like a three, really.
Ioric Kittencuddler
2: You fall on your ass like a clown. Although comedic, it hurts quite a bit because there was a small but pointy stone on the ground that injured you.
Duke 2.0
AUTOSUCCEED. You were already on the ground. However... 2: You suffer a nasty injury from a weapon striking you when the ground shifts. You are bleeding.
yougiedeggs
AUTOSUCCEED. You already fell to the ground.
Emepror_Jonathan
AUTOSUCCEED. You're already sitting. The shift brings you out of your death trance, though.
Kyselina
2: You fall on your face. You have a minor scalp wound. It bleeds profusely for such a small wound, like all scalp wounds tend to do. It's not dangerous unless you're Haemophobic though.
Frelock
3: Your stumbling and cursing is comedic gold.
Sean Mirrsen
1: You fall, twisting your ankle on the way down. Ouch. -1 to dodge and fast movement.
Kashyyk
4: You don't fall. Because you decided not to fall. Of course, you still don't do it very well, but you don't fall.
The cobblestones now depict a bloody red two.
STATUS REPORT AND HINTS:
Remember you have to wear your armor, but holding your weapons is enough to use them. 0 people have discovered the secret in this room yet. It's blatantly obvious if you look.
sjmarshy: Naked. Holding artifact Zweihander(+2 damage) and bloody armor(+1 block). Nosebleed.
Xotes: Naked. Holding two shortswords(Three styles: -1 to hit with two hit rolls/+1 to parry/+1 to parry with two parry rolls). Meanie.
lambskin: Naked. Holding some heavy armor(+1 block).
Devath: Naked. Holding heavy armor(+1 block) and glaive-guisarme(+1 damage, no counterattacks).
PTTG: Naked.
Zako: Naked. Holding mishmash set of leather armor and artifact stiletto(+2 to hit).
Mulch Diggums: Naked.
Ioric Kittencuddler: Naked. Can cast "resurrection". Injured butt.
Duke 2.0: Naked. Suffering from numerous cuts and some bruises as well.
yougiedeggs: Naked.
Emepror_Jonathan: Naked. Can go into death trance for a short while(two rounds maximum).
Kyselina: Naked. Holding a flail(+1 damage), a shield and some heavy armor(+2 block). Minor scalp wound.
Frelock: Naked. Martial artist(unarmed attacks +1 to hit).
Sean Mirrsen: Naked. Minor summoner. Twisted Ankle(-1 dodge and fast movement).
Kashyyk: Naked. Holding some heavy armor(+1 block) and a two handed battleaxe(+1 melee damage).
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I look vera, vera closely at the cobblestones.
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I attempt to summon a swarm of non-poisonous web-weaving spiders in my vicinity.
(standard-sized, please, no overgrown monsters) :)
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I do some yoga in order to increase my agility and balance.
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ok, now i know this is your game and you are the gm and all, but i REALLY think you are giving away WAAAY too many bonuses. but i guess you are free to do as you wish. you probably have some plan to negate or surpress these bonuses anyways :)
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I take and wear some heavy armor.
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I put my armour on
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I think the cobblestones will count down to 0, after which all our bonuses will be well accounted for. :)
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Oh yeah, forgot to include this:
Swarming:
Swarming is defined as multiple creatures attacking a player in one turn. After the first time a player is attacked, every successive dodge/parry/block roll has a cumulative -1 penalty(so the fifth attack would cause four -1 penalties, of -4. You die, basically).
@Sean: Why else would they be counting down, if not to cause something at the end of the countdown?
Furthermore: 60/15=4
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You could have given us a bit more time than 3 turns to prepare though, considering the overall success chances. ;) I'm not complaining though, the chaos and death is where RTD excels, pretty much like DF. :)
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I try to pick up some armor. Despite bleeding, I must make sure nothing else gets to me.
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At 0 a ton of monsters will appear. well, this is the mad wizard's Arena!
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I begin to panic, looking for a set of steel knuckles.
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This thread gets the Strife Seal of Selection (S^3) for being the least annoying of the RTD's.
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I study the room carefully, looking for a way of escape.
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ok, now i know this is your game and you are the gm and all, but i REALLY think you are giving away WAAAY too many bonuses. but i guess you are free to do as you wish. you probably have some plan to negate or surpress these bonuses anyways :)
I was actually thinking this. You really ought to avoid giving out +2's or -2's. The reason is that once you have a +2 defense, you cannot fail. At all. If everybody were to get a +2 to their defense, this game would take forever to finish, and quickly become boring.
Just my 2cp.
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On the other hand, with swarm tactics rules... Since consecutive dodge rolls during the same turn become more and more reduced, I suppose even the bonuses can work, as long as they don't go over +3.
We really need defined rulesets for RTD.
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Or better, we can make an official ruleset and variations thereof(like my rules, more bonuses but more penalties as well).
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I actually like how you, and some of the other RTD mods, are handing out bonuses to specific actions, rather than the blanket bonuses I was using. I think specific bonuses is the direction we should start moving in.
We do this long enough, and we could make our own multiplayer browser based roguelike. ;D
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I have no opinion.
Anyway, I go through the pile again looking for some suitable armor.
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I wear my armor.
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I go into a trance and try to attain matrix like fighting skills.
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Rather repetitive, aren't you? I admit, I did forget to mention it, but there's a rule against just repeating actions until you succeed. It causes AUTOFAIL.
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Oh right, I just want to get some sort of..kung fu type ability. I'd rather rely on that than breakable armor. Alright then...I..Practice sneaking (Hopefully learning how to sneak past the enemys that are sure to come)
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I, for what it's worth, will attempt to further my summoning skills next turn, unless I get a 1 or 6 on this one (hm, what's the opposite of summoning a swarm of spiders?), at least so I can get a nasty effect in when the fighting starts (Maximized Extended Mass Summon Creature III? Btw, Conjuration presumes creation of inanimate things as well.)
p.s. just in case - this is not my action for the current turn.
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You haven't actually summoned the spiders yet, though. But I suppose hands-on experience does count for something. Still, it's not even a +1 bonus, so it's essentially useless.
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No, no. I will meditate on conjuration again, but next turn. This turn, I'm still summoning the spiders.
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I attempt to pick up a torch from the wall.
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Ah. That's more sensible. Waiting for them to spin their webs?
+Cave Spider Silk Sock+
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I do suppose they end up under my control... if they do appear... so I thought of making them weave clothes around me while I meditate... :D
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I thought this was interesting...
An absolute FAIL of roll to dodge found here. http://www.neoseeker.com/forums/39168/t1223054-crash-bandicoot-roll-to-dodge/
I lol'd
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This thread gets the Strife Seal of Selection (S^3) for being the least annoying of the RTD's.
Hey, how is mine annoying? Is it the obnoxiously long title? Because I was planning on changing that eventually, and I could do it now if it's really annoying.
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Im pretty sure strife just dosn't like penguins.
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That's horrible.
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I grab a torch from the wall and wield it.
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While holding my butt, I limp over to the pile and pick up some clericy equipment.
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I try to jump out of the hemisphere.
(as it is half of a sphere it it doesn't say it has a roof!)
I presumed the roof was the hemisphere, as in a dome over our heads, seeing as we have cobbles and not a hemisphere under us.
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FINE
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Come on Boksi. Everyone's done!
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I have biological needs, people. Also, I don't think Zako has posted yet. I'll assume he simply wears his armor.
PLAYER ACTIONS:
I look vera, vera closely at the cobblestones.
2: You stare at the cobblestones. They stare back. You lose the staring contest.
I attempt to summon a swarm of non-poisonous web-weaving spiders in my vicinity.
6: You summon an enormous swarm of large spiders. They're the size of a natural spider, albeit rather large ones. They number in the dozens. And they're ready and willing to do whatever you command, for a while at least.
I do some yoga in order to increase my agility and balance.
6: You feel like you could dodge a bullet. And knowing this game, you very well might, especially with a +1 bonus to dodge, rapid movement and balance.
I take and wear some heavy armor.
4: You put the armor on. You are now clad in some heavy armor.
I put my armour on
2: You can't figure out how some of the more complicated pieces work.
I try to pick up some armor. Despite bleeding, I must make sure nothing else gets to me.
5: You grab some chainmail and leather chaps. +1 dodge.
I begin to panic, looking for a set of steel knuckles.
2: You don't find anything of the like.
I study the room carefully, looking for a way of escape.
1: Using your incredible, inhuman powers you attempt to perceive illusion magicks covering up any doors in the vicinity. You think you find a magical portal, but it turns out to be a trick and you charge into a wall instead. Ouch.
5: Fortunately, you don't suffer any damage from the collision.
Anyway, I go through the pile again looking for some suitable armor.
4: You find a matching set of leather armor. +1 dodge.
I wear my armor.
6: You put on your armor, looking incredibly awesome while doing it. You wear it with style.
I..Practice sneaking
2: You attempt to sneak around. You are very loud.
I attempt to pick up a torch from the wall.
1: You fail in doing so and instead set your hair on fire.
I grab a torch from the wall and wield it.
4: You are now holding a torch.
While holding my butt, I limp over to the pile and pick up some clericy equipment.
1: You stand up. Somehow you manage to launch yourself three meters into the air, and when you land you twist your ankle(-1 dodge and fast movement like Sean)(man, two failures in a row).
Zako:
I assume he just puts his armor on.
NPC ACTIONS:
The cobblestones turn again!
NOT-BEING-AN-IDIOT-ROLL!
sjmarshy:
5: You easily avoid falling when the cobblestones shift again.
Xotes:
5: Similarly, you have no problems just jumping a bit.
lambskin:
6: You fall to the ground. You furthermore start rolling and put out the fire in your hair.
devath:
5: You're too damn awesome to fall down. The cobblestones recognize this.
PTTG:
4: You might not be graceful about it, but you don't fall.
Zako:
AUTOSUCCEED. He didn't post, I don't have the heart to make him do this.
Mulch Diggums:
2: You're too busy sneaking and fall.
Ioric Kittencuddler:
5: You were in the air when the cobblestones shifted.
Duke 2.0:
3: Your swearing is surprisingly inventive as you struggle to not fall over.
yougiedeggs:
3: See above.
Emperor_Jonathan:
2: You fall over backwards. At least you don't set yourself on fire.
Kyselina:
6: You smash the cobblestones. Grrr...
Frelock:
2: You were in the middle of practicing when you are suddenly toppled by the cobblstones. It's rather funny, really.
Sean Mirrsen:
2: You fall again. you must have rather slow reactions. At least no injuries this time.
Kashyyk:
6: The cobblestones you're standing on cannot shift your weight. They're damaged.
STATUS AND HINTS:
Remember to wear your armor. It wont' do any good if you're just holding it. Also, always try to foil the DM's plans, it's more fun that way. Finally, nobody has found what I was hiding in this room yet, but only because of the bad rolls.
sjmarshy: Naked. Holding artifact Zweihander(+2 damage) and bloody armor(+1 block). Nosebleed.
Xotes: Naked. Holding two shortswords(Three styles: -1 to hit with two hit rolls/+1 to parry/+1 to parry with two parry rolls) and a matching set of leather armor(+1 dodge). Meanie.
lambskin: Naked. Holding some heavy armor(+1 block). Burnt hair.
Devath: Wearing heavy armor(+1 block). Holding glaive-guisarme(+1 damage, no counterattacks). Damn awesome.
PTTG: Naked.
Zako: Naked. Wearing a mishmash set of leather armor. Holding an artifact stiletto(+2 to hit).
Mulch Diggums: Naked.
Ioric Kittencuddler: Naked. Can cast "resurrection". Injured butt and twisted ankle(-1 dodge and fast movement).
Duke 2.0: Naked. Holding some chain mail and leaher chaps(+1 dodge). Suffering from numerous cuts and some bruises as well.
yougiedeggs: Naked.
Emepror_Jonathan: Naked. Can go into death trance for a short while(two rounds maximum). Holding a torch.
Kyselina: Wearing some heavy armor(+1 block). Holding a flail(+1 damage) and a shield(+1 block). Minor scalp wound.
Frelock: Naked. Martial artist(unarmed attacks +1 to hit). Agile(+1 dodge, fast movement and balance).
Sean Mirrsen: Naked. Minor summoner. Twisted Ankle(-1 dodge and fast movement). Commanding large swarm of spiders.
Kashyyk: Naked. Holding some heavy armor(+1 block) and a two handed battleaxe(+1 melee damage).
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Giving up the staring contest as a bad deal, I decide to collect the best armor I can find.
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I, as per intention, command the spiders to weave a robe around my body. Considering entrusting my life to a horde of spiders better than any possible alternatives, I then resume meditation on the intricate arts of conjuration.
(I suspect the second action might get excluded, but I sense logic in my ways - I don't walk them through the process, I just give a mental order)
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Correct. The plague of spiders is a seperate entity which you can control. So long as you aren't guiding them step-by-step, you can do something else in the meanwhile.
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I put on my armour, looking rather miffed at the wall I just ran into.
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being out of luck, I decide to sit and channel the destructive force of chuck norris.
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You know, the more I think about it, the more I suspect I will get a 1 on the spiders' action roll... ah well. What's the worst thing that can happen? :)
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I smash the cobblestone floor with my flail, using all my strenght.
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You know, the more I think about it, the more I suspect I will get a 1 on the spiders' action roll... ah well. What's the worst thing that can happen? :)
Simple. The spiders tie you up, then crawl into your body and fill your lungs with webbing.
For added effect, imagine that actually happen to you. The real-life you. Imagine the slow death by asphyxiation that follows... MWAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!
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I practice using my battle axe
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I look at the cobblestones and give them my best attempt at a reassuring glance, trying to get rid of my status as a meanie.
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I wear my armor, looking for a way to wear it that'll protect me but not restrict my movement.
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I go over to the light armor pile, looking specifically for a ninja costume that will allow me to blend with my surroundings, or, failing that, some armor that looks flexible and durable.
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;_; I keep failing in this game. Alright...I jump onto the pile of weapons in hopes to kill myself. >:] hopefully i'll get a 1 and jump into the pile, jump into the armor and have the weapons fall into my hands.
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Frustrated with my repeated failure at any sort of physical activity I concentrate again on my life magic and try to learn how to create/summon living beings to assist me.
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Edit: I check the room for exits.
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I start stomping on the stones sending a morse code signal of YYZ.
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I go over to the heavy armor pile and grab and equip pants (only pants) and a double bladed axe.
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I meditate on weapon techniques.
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Giving up the staring contest as a bad deal, I decide to collect the best armor I can find.
2: You stare at the two piles. And simply can't decide which you'd rather have.
I, as per intention, command the spiders to weave a robe around my body. Considering entrusting my life to a horde of spiders better than any possible alternatives, I then resume meditation on the intricate arts of conjuration.
4: You have learned much from your endeavors, but you are still not a match for a truly powerful summoner, nor will you ever be unless you dedicate years upon years to studying it. Still, you can probably summon something on the order of a minor elemental.
5: Your spiders weave some beautiful white robes(+1 charisma). They feel incredibly soft and slightly magical to the touch. Admittedly, it's also impossible to be badass in these robes unless you're Jesus or something. After doing this, they disappear.
I put on my armour, looking rather miffed at the wall I just ran into.
3: You put your armor on. You fail to scare the wall though with your angry look though. Also, your nosebleed finally dries up. Your nose is stifled.
being out of luck, I decide to sit and channel the destructive force of chuck norris.
2: All you manage is to channel some annoyance.
I smash the cobblestone floor with my flail, using all my strenght.
5: KYSELINA SMASH! Several cobblestones go flying upwards.
COBBLESTONE ROLL!
3: The cobblestone flies a bit, then falls.
2: The cobblestone fall back down at you!
--BLOCK ROLL:
--3: Although you manage to block in time, it hurts a bit when it strikes your shield.
3: The cobblestone hurtles for some distance and hits a wall without grace.
5: The cobblestone flies high and in an arc.(Hit is executed in NPC ACTIONS)
2: The cobblestone falls towards the person with the lowest roll!(executed in NPC ACTIONS)
You've killed a bunch of cobblestones. Meanie.
I practice using my battle axe
4: You swing it around a bit. you find that it's heavy enough to break armor.
I look at the cobblestones and give them my best attempt at a reassuring glance, trying to get rid of my status as a meanie.
3: It's not very reassuring and comes off as somewhat awkward and forced, although it's not a complete failure. You're still considered a meanie.
I wear my armor, looking for a way to wear it that'll protect me but not restrict my movement.
1: You put on your armor all wrong, the chainmail is uncomfortable and the leather chaps seem to have been used. And their owner had little bladder control. You negate your dodge bonus!
I go over to the light armor pile, looking specifically for a ninja costume that will allow me to blend with my surroundings, or, failing that, some armor that looks flexible and durable.
3: You find a ninja suit. It is bright pink.
Alright...I jump onto the pile of weapons in hopes to kill myself. >:] hopefully i'll get a 1 and jump into the pile, jump into the armor and have the weapons fall into my hands.
5: You jump on the pile. You skewer yourself on six different types of weapons and your momentum keeps you rolling. You die, but at least your corpse looks like you were either really tough or really hated. You wait a little, then pick yourself off the floor. Your body remains there; you are an ethereal spirit known as a ghost.
Frustrated with my repeated failure at any sort of physical activity I concentrate again on my life magic and try to learn how to create/summon living beings to assist me.
3: You can summon celestial kittens now.
I check the room for exits.
5: After a detailed search using your amazing analytical skills, you conclude the only actual exit possible is the steel gate. However, you find a small trapdoor concealed as more cobblestones. Opening it, however, reveals only a bunch of clothes. You surmise they're for magic users, because there are a lot of pointy hats in there. There might be other kinds of clothes there as well.
I start stomping on the stones sending a morse code signal of YYZ.
5: You stomp hard enough for it to be heard for kilometers. The IATA code for Toronto Pearson International Airport, am I right?
I go over to the heavy armor pile and grab and equip pants (only pants) and a double bladed axe.
4: You can't find any pants, but you do find a nice-looking axe(+1 damage). You notice there is a fur loincloth there as well.
I meditate on weapon techniques.
5: You discover the secrets of Dragoons. The FF type dragoons. In case you don't know how they work, they wear heavy armor and a spear(your glaive-guisarme should work as a polearm), and they jump high into the air then land on their opponents, spearhead first.
NPC ACTIONS:
The cobblestones shift for a final time!
YOU-SHOULD-KNOW-WHAT-TO-EXPECT-BY-NOW ROLL!
sjmarshy
1:You fall on your face. Again. Your nosebleed starts again as well.
Xotes
5: Unlike sjmarshy, you don't fall on your face. You don't fall at all.
lambskin
2: You fall down
Devath
1: You fall and struggle quite a bit trying to get up before finally making it.
PTTG
6: You stare evilly at a single cobblestone. It's so scared that when you tell it to turn into a dagger, it does. The surrounding cobblestones are also scared of you. Meanie.
Zako
1: You stare evilly at the cobblestones as well. they are not amused and send you hurtling down flat on your face.
MASSIVE DAMAGE AVOIDANCE ROLL:
5: Your skull is thick enough that you don't suffer any real damage.
Mulch Diggums: You watch the others with a curious sense of apathy.
Ioric Kittencuddler
5: The cobblestones sympathize with your plight. They don't trip you.
Duke 2.0
2: Oof! You fall!
yougiedeggs
2: You fall. Things aren't going well for you at all.
Emperor_Jonathan
4: With a hop, you avoid falling entirely.
Kyselina
5: The cobblestones are scared of you. They all turn their red ones turn into red :< s
Frelock
3(2+1): you just barely avoid falling.
Sean Mirrsen
6: Buoyed by your new powers, you command the cobblestones not to turn. They do so, probably only out of shock though.
Kashyyk
4: You don't fall. I suppose.
The cobblestones now display nothing. The steel gates slam open! Behind them, there is a hallway filled with a horde of angry, confused goblins. They're all armed, too.
COBBLESTONE TIME!
The cobblestone hurtles toward one of the people who rolled a 1 in this turn!
Duke 2.0 1
sjmarshy 1
Devath 2
Zako 4
The cobblestone htis the floor, breaks into two seperate pieces, each of which strikes one of the poor sods!
MASIVE DAMAGE AVOIDANCE ROLLS!
5: The piece of cobblestone bounces off your powerful and incredibly manly pectoral muscles!
4: You duck under the cobblestone piece.
AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT!
The other cobblestone hurtles toward the goblins!
MASSIVE DAMAGE ROLL!
4: The cobblestone strikes on of the goblins in the face, killing him!
59 more to go!
STATUS AND HINTS:
Oops! Goblins, and a lot of them, too. You can also reach another room now, which is good because your goal is to eventually escape.
@Sean: Your hair is currently undefined and you're wearing very beautiful robes. If you decide your hair has always been long and blonde (http://fireemblem.wikia.com/wiki/Lucius), well... Er, status report.
sjmarshy: Wearing bloody armor(+1 block). Holding artifact Zweihander(+2 damage). Nosebleed.
Xotes: Naked. Holding two shortswords(Three styles: -1 to hit with two hit rolls/+1 to parry/+1 to parry with two parry rolls) and a matching set of leather armor(+1 dodge). Meanie.
lambskin: Naked. Holding some heavy armor(+1 block). Burnt hair.
Devath: Wearing heavy armor(+1 block). Holding glaive-guisarme(+1 damage, no counterattacks). Damn awesome. Can use Jump attack(jumps in an arc towards a hostile creature. Requires a seperate jump check, but gives a +1 bonus to damage rolls).
PTTG: Naked. Meanie.
Zako: Wearing a mishmash set of leather armor. Holding an artifact stiletto(+2 to hit).
Mulch Diggums: Dead. Ghost.
Ioric Kittencuddler: Naked. Can cast "resurrection" and summon celestial kittens. Injured butt and twisted ankle(-1 dodge and fast movement).
Duke 2.0: Wearing some chain mail and leaher chaps(+1 dodge), but doing it wrong and negating the bonus. Suffering from numerous cuts and some bruises as well.
yougiedeggs: Naked. And annoyed.
Emepror_Jonathan: Naked. Can go into death trance for a short while(two rounds maximum). Holding a torch and a nice-looking two-bladed axe(+1 damage).
Kyselina: Wearing some heavy armor(+1 block). Holding a flail(+1 damage) and a shield(+1 block). Minor scalp wound. Meanie.
Frelock: Naked. Holding bright pink ninja suit. Martial artist(unarmed attacks +1 to hit). Agile(+1 dodge, fast movement and balance).
Sean Mirrsen: Waring beautiful white silk robes(+1 charisma). Summoner. Twisted Ankle(-1 dodge and fast movement).
Kashyyk: Naked. Holding some heavy armor(+1 block) and a two handed battleaxe(+1 melee damage).
-
I wait for the first goblin to come near me, and swing diagonally down at the goblin, hoping to separate some major parts of its body.
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@Boksi - You have doomed yourself to eternal die-rolling if one of us causes an explosion that affects all the goblins. :)
I consider the goblins a threat to my existence. I summon several (as many as I can) Dire Porcupines, that will, upon appearing, shoot needles at the goblins. (Note to self - treating that ankle should also help)
Also, my hair (or rather, my character's hair) is short and black. The hairstyle is something that would befit a mechwarrior.
Also also, did you know spidersilk has a tensile strength comparable to fine steel?
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I grab the cobblestone dagger; Hopefully from the not-pointy end.
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I forget about the power ranger suit. Being a martial artist, I attempt to go into a martial trance, which would negate the swarm bonus. I can only attack/defend while in the trance, though.
As an added note, if I am extremely lucky and get a six, perhaps I could also gain the ability to counterstrike whenever I roll a six to dodge. The added detriment would be that I would be exhausted when I left the trance (aka, when I can no longer attack/defend, meaning no more enemies, or too numerous wounds).
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I have to get lucky now...
I charge at a goblin shoulder first, wario style
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I duck behind the rest of the people, using them as shields, and attempt to put on my armor, having realized that just holding it would do nothing except burden me.
This is, of course, if I haven't put it on. If I have, I still duck behind everyone else but get into my best ass-kicking pose for when they break through.
-
Being that I'm all clericey and stuff, I move away from the goblins, towards the pile of weapons and armor that Mulch succeeded in killing himself with. I try to find some clericey type equipment.
-
I try to turn myself into a zombie so I can still kill the enemys
-
Don't you need necromancy abilities for that or something?
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Well, I don't think there's a rule that states that he can't possess his own corpse. And it would be like a classical zombie, minus the infecting.
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Wouldn't it be more like a fantasy zombie then? It's a corpse that's been possessed by a spirit in order to make it move around. Besides, he doesn't have rigor mortis yet so he shouldn't be stiff. Can I resurrect him if he's possessed his own dead body?
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I suppose so... Of course, it might also split his spirit into two... Hrmmm... It depends on the die roll then.. Heheh... Die roll...
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:( the dice in this game dont like me like imortal's
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I pick up and equip the furry loincloth.
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:( the dice in this game dont like me like imortal's
Don't worry little buddy, they sort of like me about half the time.
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I search thoroughly in the trapdoor compartment for anything useful to me.
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I put as many people between me and the goblins as possible and meditate on defense.
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I put on my armour and wait for a Toronto bound jumbo jet to crash through the roof.
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If that action did qualify, I'd expect its effect would be akin to "you successfully wait until a Toronto bound jumbo jet crashes through the roof. You are staggered to discover that you have spent 1583 and a half years in stasis. Also, you are now covered in kerosene. Burning kerosene." :)
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Again, I smash at the ground with my flail with all my might.... IN ATTEMPT TO SEND THESE GOD DAMN GOBLINS FLYING!
Also, Boksi. I think you didn't add a +1 damage to my flail smash, so it should have been 6.
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Ah yes. Well, the effects would have been the same anyway.
-
I put my armour on
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wow this game is slowing down a bit.
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annoying huh?
-
Yeah yeah, I'll get on with it. Multiple moments please.
-
here it is. I'm somewhat angry right now and I'm taking it out on you guys. Yes, you.
PLAYER ACTIONS!
I wait for the first goblin to come near me, and swing diagonally down at the goblin, hoping to separate some major parts of its body.
2(+0): you just stand there, dumbfounded.
I consider the goblins a threat to my existence. I summon several (as many as I can) Dire Porcupines, that will, upon appearing, shoot needles at the goblins. (Note to self - treating that ankle should also help)
5(+0): You summon (2d4-2=) 3 dire porcupines. When will you get a bad roll? Grrr...
I grab the cobblestone dagger; Hopefully from the not-pointy end.
1(+0): You somehow stab the dagger through your hand, completely ruining it and causing a lot of bleeding. Man you suck.
Being a martial artist, I attempt to go into a martial trance, which would negate the swarm bonus. I can only attack/defend while in the trance, though.
3(+0): You do quite well, but then you think of something ridiculously funny and burst out laughing.
I charge at a goblin shoulder first, wario style
2: You charge at a goblin swordsman like a madman. Goblin gets counterattack before you strike at +1 bonus.
5(4+1): He hits you in a vital area! +1 damage roll!
4(3+1): Congratulations! You are now a proud owner of a gaping hole in your chest where you left kidney used to be! And as a bonus, you are now suffering from heavy bleeding!
I duck behind the rest of the people, using them as shields, and attempt to put on my armor, having realized that just holding it would do nothing except burden me.
4(+0): Although you don't actually have any armor, you manage to run to the other end of the room and hide in a corner, as insofar as a hemispherical room has corners. Consider yourself spared from the coming goblin onslaught for this round.
Being that I'm all clericey and stuff, I move away from the goblins, towards the pile of weapons and armor that Mulch succeeded in killing himself with. I try to find some clericey type equipment.
4(+0): You find a mace(+1 damage) and a suit of iron armor along with a shield(+1 block).
I try to turn myself into a zombie so I can still kill the enemys
5(+0): RAAAAGGGHH! I HUNGER FOR THE FLESH AND SOULS OF THOSE WHO HAVE WRONGED ME! You move like normal but are unable to use magic abilities. All magic harms you, including healing magic.
I pick up and equip the furry loincloth.
5(+0): You are wearing more than just a furry loincloth. You are wearing the essence of the furry loincloth. It is the great force that drives forward all of civilization, yet it's greatest expression is the primitive scream of rage bellowing from you. You're a lot tougher than most now, and can withstand a lot more damage than the rest of the cast. See poor yougiedeggs' chest wound? Wouldn't slow you down more than a sprained wrist at most.
I search thoroughly in the trapdoor compartment for anything useful to me.
6(+0): You search through the compartment with such incredible speed that you literally tear through the clothing. Eventually you find a Ring of the Assassin, which gives a bonus on hide check made in shadows. Unfortunately, in your mad search, you got tangled in the various clothes and cannot move easily, if at all.
I put as many people between me and the goblins as possible and meditate on defense.
1(+0): You jump at an axegoblin! Unfortunately, you miscalculate and hit your head on the roof! You fall towards the axegoblin!
DODGE ROLL!
2(+0): The axegoblin is picking his nose and doesn't notice you! WHAM!
DAMAGE ROLL!
6(+0): SPLAT! Bits and pieces of goblin are strewn about, thanks to your incredible weight hitting him suddenly.
Unfortunately, you are now prone and unable to do much anything. -1 to block, as if the swarming rules weren't enough...
I put on my armour and wait for a Toronto bound jumbo jet to crash through the roof.
2(+0):You put on your armor and wait. Nothing happens.
Again, I smash at the ground with my flail with all my might.... IN ATTEMPT TO SEND THESE GOD DAMN GOBLINS FLYING!
7(6+1): KYSELINA SMASH! Your flail hits with the force of a meteor striking the earth! Your rage knows no limits! The gods quake before you! No mortal can match the destruction caused by a single swing of a flail you make! I'm even hitting the keys on my keyboard harder than normal! No sentence in this paragraph is without an exclamation mark! Have I got my point across about the incredible force you hit the ground with yet?! GOOD! BECAUSE YOU CAUSED AN AREA-OF-EFFECT EXPLOSION OF COBBLESTONES! 5d4= 13 FRIGGING COBBLESTONES! UNLUCKY NUMBER! YOU GET HIT BY FIVE OF THEM! BLOCK ROLL, WITH SWARM RULE IN EFFECT!
3+(1+1+1): You block, but it hurts like heck!
5(4+1+1-1): You block that one as well!
6(6+1+1-2): That one goes flying away and towards Sean Mirrsen because I don't like his luck.
0(1+1+1-3): ARGH! Broken collarbone and a broken jaw! Very nasty injuries! Heavy internal bleeding!
1(3+1+1-4): HEAD TRAUMA ROLL!
5: you avoid serious head trauma, but you're still woozy. Minus -1 to all rolls for 2 rounds! That is, this round and the next one.
I put my armour on
5(+0): You put your armor on. You look somewhat intimidating, but that won't help you because it's only a fraction of a bonus.
NPC ACTIONS!
COBBLESTONE FUN TIMES AHEAD!
1d8 = 7 cobblestones veer toward the goblins! The last one simply strikes the wall.
COBBLESTONE ALPHA REPORTING IN!
2(+0): The goblin completely fails to dodge and the cobblestone hits him!
DAMAGE ROLL!
6(+0): The spinning cobblestone strikes the goblin in the head! It explodes into gore!
3(+0): The goblin just so dodges the cobblestone!
6(+0): The goblin dodges into the wall!
DAMAGE ROLL!
6(+0): It makes a nice abstract red-colored mural on the wall!
1(+0): The goblin stares dumbfounded at the rock hurtling towards him.
DAMAGE ROLL AT +1 BONUS!
3(2+1): Smack! Broken left arm!
5(+0): The cobblestone strikes the goblin in the chest!
DAMAGE ROLL!
3(+0): A broken rib. That is all, gentlemen.
6:(+0): The cobblestone expertly fits into the open mouth of the goblin!
DAMAGE ROLL AT +1 BONUS!
7(6+1): KABLAMMO! The cobblestone goes straight through like a legendary miner through rock!
5(+0): The cobblestone strikes yet another goblin. Why is it that my minions are dropping like flies?!
DAMAGE ROLL!
5(+0): Alright, this is pissing me off. All of you will die. Like this goblin just did. That's, what, one dodge out of seven? And two survivors out of six? What sort of bewitchery is this? Grrr...
COBBLESTONE STRIKE GROUP BETA, REPORTING IN!
Hehehehe... I didn't forget that one was headed towards Sean...
1(+0): No! NO! THIS CANNOT BE! I AM INVIN- no wait, that last part doesn't fit...
GO GO GOBLIN RANGERS!
Grrr... There are 54 goblins left. Yes, you read that right. 54 goblins. You're all gonna die. Problem is, I can't finish this turn right now. Don't even think of queuing up any actions until I've rolled over a hundred dice and posted the results. Grrr...
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I feel so sorry for you Boksi
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If it makes you feel better, Boksi, one of the planned events in my game is a Zerg rush. :D
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ah bugger!
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If it makes you feel better, Boksi, one of the planned events in my game is a Zerg rush. :D
Kekekekekeke!
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I try to eat the flesh of the most alive goblin.
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He didn't finish rolling yet.
-
he has 32 to roll, and 3 players are dead. *GULP*
-
10 left to roll, actually, and 4 dead, as well as at least 1 mortal injury.
-
Ouch. I can bet the next room's surprise will be a battalion of minotaurs. I'm not even going to guess whether I'm alive or no, with the dodge penalty from the ankle...
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No, it's actually pretty quiet. So long as you don't enter it, nothing bad will happen to you. If you do, though, you'll have to beware constant navigational hazards, poor lighting and some other unspecified threat. If you survive this. I promise that much, at least.
Maybe I'll give you people a one-time action next round. So you might actually survive, y'know.
-
Grrr... Goblin rage!
Normal targets get three or four goblins. Easy targets get more!
BWAHAHAHAHA!
Easy targets are Devath, who is prone and can't defend himself, Kyselina who is wounded and woozy, and to a lesser extent PTTG, who has pretty much earned the title "the pathetic".
AXEGOBLIN ATTACK!
3(+0): The axegoblin strikes Devath!
BLOCK ROLL!
5(6-1): Devath blocks the attack!
6(+0): Another axegoblin strikes at poor Devath!
BLOCK ROLL!
0(2-1-1): Absolute failure! You get into an awkward position, increasing your block penalty to -2!
DAMAGE ROLL WITH +1 BONUS!
6(5+1): HAHA! You just lost a leg! Very heavy bleeding!
3(+0): A goblin strikes at sjmarshy!
BLOCK ROLL!
5(4+1): The attack, as pathetic as it was, clatters harmlessly off you armor!
1(+0): An axegoblin attempts an attack against(no player beginning with A? Awww) Sean Mirrsen's porcupine! He hits himself instead!
DAMAGE ROLL!
4(+0): That's a nasty wound the goblin is suffering from there! Heavy bleeding!
4(+0): Another axegoblin lashes out against the terrifying porcupines!
DODGE ROLL!
3(+0): The porcupine is intact!
4(+0): Axegoblin targets Kyselina!
BLOCK ROLL!
-2(3+1-1-5): Whoops! Swarm rules! You cannot block at all! Goblin gets +1 bonus!
DAMAGE ROLL!
4(3+1): You just lost an arm! Don't worry, I'll endeavor to give you a true DF style death :3
3(+0): PTTG SHALL FALL!
DODGE ROLL!
4(+0): PTTG DODGES!
4(+0): KASHYYK!
BLOCK ROLL!
2(1+1): Failure! You fail! Et cetera!
DAMAGE ROLL!
6(+0): BLAM! Your head is split in two! You are dead! Your spirit floats out, cringes and checks his head.
1(+0): The ninth axegoblin(yes, I'm keeping track) hurls his axe away accidentally instead of actually hitting yougiedeggs. I suppose he needs some luck every now and then.
6(+0): Imitating the other one, but intelligently, another axegoblin hurls his axe towards Emperor_Jonathan!
DODGE ROLL!
5(+0): Never hurl your axe over six meters and expect someone watching you not to notice it!
5(+0): Goblin rage! Ioric, the cuddler of kittens, is next! RAGH!
DODGE ROLL!
2(3-1): You fail at basic not getting killed!
DAMAGE ROLL!
3(+0): Ow. I suppose. It's not that bad of a wound, but still, it hurts a lot.
2(+0): The twelfth goblin just stands there. Duuuuurrrr...
2(+0): And the thirteenth decides to join him.
6(+0): The fourteenth axegoblin doesn't like their ideas, and charges Zako like a crazy bastard!
DODGE ROLL!
4(+0): Zako avoid him!
3(+0): Two other axegoblins don't like how Mulch Diggums looks and attack him!
DODGE ROLL!
2(+0): Mulch hasn't quite gained full control of his old body and fails to dodge!
DAMAGE ROLL!
2(+0): Still, a cut is hardly going to injure a zombie.
1(+0): The second axegoblin isn't quite as smart as the first one and simply falls down on his face.
1(+0): The seventeenth axegoblin is even dumber, and chokes on his own drool a bit. Stupid goblins... At least I've got better servants in the rooms ahead... Oh yes, I do indeed...
BOWGOBLIN BLAST!
The squad of bowgoblins takes aim! Doom to whomever they hit!
5(+0): Kyselina! Death awaits you!
BLOCK ROLL!
-1(5+1-1-6): You completely fail to block the arrow!
DAMAGE ROLL AT +1 BONUS!
7(6+1): Every single organ in your body is pierced through at the same time! You are dead! Your spirit is relieved form it's pain and desperation...
5(+0): Sean Mirrsen! Your luck will be tolerated no longer!
DODGE ROLL!
4(5-1): Curses!
2(+0): Awww... Thirdie doesn't want to play...
4(+0): The final bowgoblin takes aim at lambskin, and fires!
BLOCK ROLL!
3(2+1): The arrow makes a nasty dent in your armor.
HAMMERTIME!
God, I'm tired of all this rolling. And I've only killed two of you. Time to drop the hammer on Devath.
3(+0): A hammergoblin stirkes[sic] Devath!
BLOCK ROLL!
-2(2-2-2): You absolutely fail to block the hammer.
DAMAGE ROLL WITH +1 BONUS!
6(5+1): WHAM! Your face is now neighbors with your hippocampus. You are dead! Your spirit floats up, cursing every single goblin it sees. It doesn't do anything though, because they're not magical curses.
2(+0): One hammergoblin temporarily forgets how to move his feet.
3(+0): Another one has no dance magic, but still strikes at Frelock!
DODGE ROLL!
3(2+1): You dodge the hammer!
1(+0): One hammergoblin goes batshit insane from stress! He bashes his brains in!
DAMAGE ROLL!
6(+0): KABLAMM! Bits of goblin brain fly everywhere!
1(+0): Another more heroic goblin attempts an assault versus the dire porcupine menace, but only succeeds in tripping and falling on his rear.
4(+0): Screaming obscenities, one of the hammergoblins drops the hammer on PTTG!
DODGE ROLL!
4(5-1): PTTG dodge again! Amazing!
6(+0): HAMMERFALL! Sjmarshy is going down!
BLOCK ROLL!
3(4-1): You are bruised but not seriously injured.
1(+0): Another goblin drops his hammer on his toes!
DAMAGE ROLL!
4(+0): He breaks one foot!
5(+0): No mercy! Yougiedeggs!
DODGE ROLL!
1(+0): You hurl yourself at the hammer!
DAMAGE ROLL AT +1 BONUS!
7(6+1): I love it when a dice roll goes my way. Your chest is removed from the rest of your body. You die. Your spirit says something to the effect of "figures"...
4(+0): Lambskin is the next target!
BLOCK ROLL!
2(3-1): You fail to block the hammer!
DAMAGE ROLL!
4(+0): You break an arm. The left one.
4(+0): Hmmm... Zako! DIE!
DODGE ROLL!
2(3-1): You fail to dodge! Oh noes!
DAMAGE ROLL!
5(+0): Several ribs break and your left lung is pierced by one! Heavy internal bleeding! OH NOSES!
3(+0): DOWN WITH THE EMPEROR!
DODGE ROLL!
3(4-1): Emperor_Jonathan dodges.
6(+0): The thirteenth hammergoblin literally hurls himself at Ioric Kittencuddler.
DODGE ROLL!
4(6-1-1): Ioric dodges the hammergoblin-projectile! It skids to a stop a while away. It is prone!
5(+0): Hammergoblin rage is directed towards PTTG!
DODGE ROLL!
2(4-2): Finally! The hammergoblin lands a hit on PTTG!
DAMAGE ROLL!
1(+0): It causes PTTG's hand to heal! WHAT THE FLAMING FUCK?!
1(+0): The fifteenth hammergoblin spontaneously combusts!
FIRE DAMAGE ROLL!
1(+0): The hammergoblin is not harmed at all.
5(+0): The sixteenth hammergoblin strikes Frelock!
DODGE ROLL!
1(1+1-1): HAMMERFALL!
DAMAGE ROLL AT +1 BONUS!
3(2+1): Frelock is bruised but not broken.
3(+0): Final hammergoblin attack! Sean Mirrsen!
DODGE ROLL!
2(3-1): Whee! Finally!
DAMAGE ROLL!
3: The goblin falls flat on his face in front of Sean. His hammer lands on his foot, complicating his movements even more, but except for his foot, Sean is unharmed!
SWORDGOBLIN STRIKE!
4(+0): Two swordgoblins try to strike down the porcupine menace!
DODGE ROLL!
3(4-1): The porcupine dodges! Dang porcupines!
2(+0): The other swordgoblin develops temporary amnesia!
6(+0): The third swordgoblin throws his sword at Mulch Diggums!
DODGE ROLL!
5(6-1): Whoops. Turns out this isn't an awesome move to make.
6(+0): Undaunted, the fourth swordgoblin tries the same!
DODGE ROLL!
0(2-2): Now that was unexpected!
DAMAGE ROLL WITH +1 BONUS!
7(6+1): Schluck! Your head flies off. You can still move that part of your body, but the rest falls down lifeless.
4(+0): Now for Jonathan...
DODGE ROLL!
5(6-1): Grr.. Another dodge?
4(+0): I'm not giving up that easily.
DODGE ROLL!
2(4-2): HAHA! HIT!
DAMAGE ROLL!
5(+0): Yes. The emperor is dead! Long live the emperor! No wait, you're not quite dead. Darn. Still, I don't think you can last long with such a heavily bleeding wound...
5(+0): Alright... Let's go for PTTG!
DODGE ROLL!
-2(1-3): Epic Fail!
DAMAGE ROLL AT +1 BONUS!
5(4+1): Ouch! Wasn't that your just-healed hand? Heavy bleeding is to be expected.
3(+0): The swordgoblin figures that they're gonna win anyway, so why stick his neck on the line?
5(+0): The ninth swordgoblin decides to attack Zako!
DODGE ROLL!
3(4-1): Zako dodges that, at least.
2(+0): Swordgoblin McSorethumb does not want to fight.
2(+0): And neither does his cousin, Cheesemaker McSorethumb
4(+0): The twelfth swordgoblin does, though. He attacks Frelock!
DODGE ROLL!
2(3+1-2): Frelock fails to dodge!
DAMAGE ROLL!
6(+0): YEE-OW! That must've hurt. Is that your pelvis in your ribcage? You are dead. Your ghost is vengeful.
5(+0): The thirteenth swordgoblin, a father of two, attacks sjmarshy!
BLOCK ROLL!
3(4+1-2): You block. It's not well-executed, but you're still alive.
3(+0): Swordgoblin McIncestlasher came to the same conclusion as the eighth swordgoblin. Remember that guy?
THE REST OF THE GOBLINS!
3(+0): The previously(last round) injured axegoblin runs away. Sorta. He can't run very fast because of his broken rib.
4(+0): The goblin swordsman also runs away. He has an injured left arm, in case you're curious.
SUMMONED BEAST!
No, I hadn't forgotten. Here, it's only fair, really.
1(+0): One of the porcupines shoots another porcupine!
DODGE ROLL!
4(+0): That porcupine is unscratched!
6(+0): Another porcupine releases a storm of quills, hitting everything in the area!
PORCUPINE A DODGE ROLL!
3(5-2): The porcupine dodges, somehow!
PORCUPINE C DODGE ROLL!
6(+0): The porcupine hurls itself three meters into the air!
AXEGOBLIN DODGE ROLL!
1(+0): The axegoblin is perforated by needles. Combined with earlier injuries, this causes his death!
AXEGOBLIN 2 DODGE ROLL!
6(+0): The other axegoblin beats the porcupine, actually hitting the roof!
HAMMERGOBLIN DODGE ROLL!
0(1-1): The hammergoblin, having already fallen prone, is completely unable to defend himself!
HAMMERGOBLIN DAMAGE ROLL!
3(2+1): However, he proves surprisingly resistant to the quills.
HAMMERGOBLIN 2 DODGE ROLL!
3(+0): The goblin is only slightly perforated. Only maybe two dozen quills at most.
HAMMERGOBLIN 2 DAMAGE ROLL!
2(+0): It does not impede him the slightest.
SWORDGOBLIN DODGE ROLL!
3(+0): Similar to hammergoblin 2
SWORDGOBLIN DAMAGE ROLL!
2(+0): Geez, it's a carbon copy. What are the odds? No, really, it should be a simple enough calculation. You can do that, can't you?
6(+0): I am not doing all those rolls again. Instead, let's say that the last porcupine killed two bowgoblins.
I really can't be bothered to update the list. You can just use last round's and update it personally if you want to. I've done too much already.
Anyway, I'm introducing a temporary new mechanic. Limit breaks. Yeah, the JRPG concept. You think it's lame? Well, if you still think it's lame after what I say, you must have a serious grudge against them. Here's how it goes:
Anyone still alive, ie not dead or undead, can perform this, but only if I say so. Like this next round, I'll allow you to do them so you can actually survive. First of all, limit breaks do not depend on random chance, they depend on your ability to be bizarre. You simply state how it happens, within limits. You cannot extend the scene beyond this room, but you can summon any object you need as part of it. Make sure it isn't too long, you lose points for that. The more ridiculous, contrived, insane and generally crazy your limit break is, the better your outcome. It's still random, but I assign dice to it depending on how I like it. Remember to make it weird and hilarious, but coolness can help if you can add that too.
So there you have it. Round's over, I've likely made some mistakes and frankly I don't care a bit.
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Limit break huh? well seeing as I'm not going to move too well after the bruising I've just recieved, I attempt to summon a custard gollum(or however you spell it). This gollum slowly walks through the goblin masses. absorbing the odd weapon, ignoring physical attacks and suffocating any it comes in contact with, due to the horrid lumpy consistancy of the custard it was born of.
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That's a decent attempt. Not too impressive, but I chuckled so it's a solid hit. You can change it if you think of a better one.
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If I made myself auto-overshoot summoning a Dire Wolf, and ended up with a Daishi (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daishi#Daishi.2FDire_Wolf) landing on top of the goblins, would that qualify?
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Hmm... Yes. I think it would. It would only work as a very large hunk of metal falling on them, though, and disappear after the limit break.
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Hrm. As my armor was already equipped, and I feel my power level rising, I feel free to shout "OVER NINE THOUSAND!!!" And then proceed to zip around the room at the speed of sound, bouncing off the walls like a pinball in the hands of a good player. I then, having shocked the goblins into being frozen by the fact that I am unharmed in the slightest, do it again but this time I plow into the goblins using my hands and my feet and my daggers to cause much death.
How's that?
In response... HUZZAH! :D
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The part where you bounce around like a pinball was amusing, yes. Solid hit as well.
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Ok, try this you green bastards!
Limit break! I focus my rage into existance in the physical reality and create...
A flying slipper...OF DEATH!
It grows teeth and becomes bigger and devours all my goblin foes!
Edit: I love kitties! I feel the love.
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I grow spider legs out of my neck and jump at the goblins to try to impale themwith my sharp legs. >:D fuck science and reason! woo!
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can we post an action, or is this a limit round? If we can, I attempt to posess one of the goblins.
Edit: By the way, Boksi, excellent game! This is the best roll to dodge yet, just stop rolling me 2's!
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Yeah, dead or undead characters(like Mulch Diggums) can use normal actions. So can living characters, but they're probably better off doing a limit break.
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Alright, tell me what you think of my limit break: I strike a pose, sticking my finger up into the air to summon a horde of one hundred (100) adorable winged kittens who then fly in a circles around the room letting out their adorable plaintive calls (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5CEl2X7OecM). This continues five (5) seconds with various different camera angles before I lower my hand and the adorable host sweeps down upon everyone visible. The kittens land on everyone in the vicinity and start licking them with their adorable scratchy little tongues. This might be a good point for them to lick the flesh off their bones since that's what cat's tongues are for, but instead their saliva is made out of the concentrated essence of love! Overwhelmed by the adorableness, enemies change sides, helping to fight against any who would dare to harm the bringer of such fuzzy soft warm squeaky little puddins. Thanks to the fact that the kitten's saliva is in fact made of love, it also heals the wounds of any who feel the love because love is more powerful than death or something. Also whenever they lick someone little heart shaped confetti appears in the wake of their tongues.
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A limit break of bringing all the dead back would be appreciated...
Edit: Yay Kittens!
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Well, if your heart is full of love then you'll be healed of all wounds! Love of kittens! Kittens (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cbRljNwZ7yU)!
It's basically a combination of my two other powers.
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Oh and btw, I also have my body turn into c4 and explode. =\ yeah.
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SCRATCH THAT
LIMIT!
I SPIN AROUND THE ROOM WITH ARMS AS STRONG AS STEEL WIth MY ARMS HITTING EVERYONE WITHOUT ABANDON!
ASWELL AS BURNING THEM WITH MY TORCH AND HACKING THEM WITH MY AXE!
MY LIMIT ALSO HEALS ALLMY INJURIES!
My heart is now full of love.
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Not to spam the thread with youtube kitten videos, but here is kittencuddlers limit break in a nutshell.
http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbn75LITtlc
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Kind of ironic how I broke my left arm, considering I broke it twice in real life. Anyways, I let loose a fart of SPICY BLACK BEAN FLAVOUR! Aimed at the hammer goblins.
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Not to spam the thread with youtube kitten videos, but here is kittencuddlers limit break in a nutshell.
http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbn75LITtlc
Oh you, I rolf'd and lawl'd... =] If I were god I would totaly make kittens the ultimate medicine...
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Just 'cause I'm a nice guy, I did the stats:
1. sjmarshy:Wearing bloody armor(+1 block). Holding artifact Zweihander(+2 damage). Nosebleed. Bruised.
2. Xotes: Naked. Holding two shortswords(Three styles: -1 to hit with two hit rolls/+1 to parry/+1 to parry with two parry rolls) and wearing a matching set of leather armor(+1 dodge). Meanie.
3. lambskin: Wearing some heavy armor(+1 block). Nasty Dent in armor. Left arm Broken. Burnt hair.
4. Devath: Dead. Ghost.
Body: Wearing heavy armor(+1 block). Holding glaive-guisarme(+1 damage, no counterattacks). Can use Jump attack(jumps in an arc towards a hostile creature. Requires a seperate jump check, but gives a +1 bonus to damage rolls). Lost a leg. Face next to hippocampus.
5. PTTG: Naked. Heavily bleeding hand. Meanie.
6. Zako: Wearing a mishmash set of leather armor. Holding an artifact stiletto(+2 to hit). Holding Ring of the Assasin (bonus on hide check made in shadows). Tangled in clothes. Broken ribs. Pierced Left Lung. Heavy internal bleeding.
7. Mulch Diggums: Dead. Zombie. Head detached from body (can only control head). Can't use magic, and all magic used on him is harmful, including healing magic.
8. Ioric Kittencuddler: Naked. Can cast "resurrection" and summon celestial kittens. Injured butt and twisted ankle(-1 dodge and fast movement). Holding a mace(+1 damage) and a suit of iron armor along with a shield(+1 block) Hurt (not severely).
9. Duke 2.0: Wearing some chain mail and leaher chaps(+1 dodge), but doing it wrong and negating the bonus. Suffering from numerous cuts and some bruises as well.
10. yougiedeggs: Dead. Ghost. And annoyed.
Body: Naked. No Left Kidney. Chest removed from body.
11. Emepror_Jonathan: Wearing furry loincloth. Tough (more immune to pain). Can go into death trance for a short while(two rounds maximum). Holding a torch and a nice-looking two-bladed axe(+1 damage). Heavy Bleeding
12. Kyselina: Dead. Ghost. Meanie.
Body:Wearing some heavy armor(+1 block). Holding a flail(+1 damage) and a shield(+1 block). Minor scalp wound. Broken collarbone and a broken jaw. Missing an arm. All internal organs pierced.
13. Frelock: Dead. Ghost. Vengful.
Body: Naked. Martial artist(unarmed attacks +1 to hit). Agile(+1 dodge, fast movement and balance). Pelvis in ribcage.
14. Sean Mirrsen: Waring beautiful white silk robes(+1 charisma). Summoner. Twisted Ankle(-1 dodge and fast movement). Crushed foot.
15. Kashyyk: Dead. Ghost.
Body: Wearing some heavy armor(+1 block) and a two handed battleaxe(+1 melee damage). Head clove in twain.
Dire Porcupine A: Unharmed
Dire Porcupine B: Unharmed
Dire Porcupine C: Unharmed
Unspecified Goblin(x5): Dead
Axgoblin: Dead
Axgoblin(x2): Missing Axe
Axgoblin: Running Away. Broken rib.
Axgoblin: flat on his face
Axgoblin(x13): Unharmed
Bowgoblin(x2): Unharmed
Bowgoblin(x2): Dead
Hammergoblin: Dead
Hammergoblin: Broken foot
Hammergoblin: Prone.
Hammergoblin: Flat on face in front of Sean
Hammergoblin(x13): Unharmed
Swordgoblin(x2): Missing Sword
Swordgoblin: Ran away. Injured left arm
Swordgoblin(x12): Unharmed
(I'm missing a goblin somewhere, it only adds up to 59 (and yes, I included the one killed last turn))
Only mistake I noticed during the turn: you said Xotes could put on his armor because he wasn't holding any. In the stats from the last turn, it says he was holding a matching set of leather armor(+1 dodge). Personally, I think you should let him put it on.
If I did anything wrong, and you find it, please fix it. Thanks.
As for my turn:
Being a vengeful ghost, I attempt to scare the goblins away doing typical ghosty-stuff (rattling chains, slamming doors, eerie noises, terrifying visions, that sort of thing.)
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Limit break, eh?
I summon a Mandrill. Don't ask me how, I just get one. Now I make friends with the Mandrill, perhaps talking to it about trains. Mandrills love trains. Don't ask me why, Mother Nature is messed up like that. So we are there talking about trains, and I mention how goblins dislike trains. Yes, goblins dislike trains. Who knows why, I'm not into histroy crap. So the Mandrill gets really angry. Not Clint Eastwood angry, not Hulk angry, Freakin' bizare angry. The Mandrill starts ripping off it's fur and makes a real rukus.
Now here I am, sitting there with cuts and scrapes and an angry Mandrill, and I see some goblins. Now I don't say nothin', as the Mandrill starts to charge the goblins. Normally goblins like to swarm, and they were pretty much surrounding us. But the Mandrill didn't care, leaping hairless and shouting. You know what it does? It starts throwing up. Now I don't think they could have that much in it's stomach, but it was heaving chunks like a Hydra taking town a village filled with kids.
Now keep in mind these goblins were trying to swarm the Mandrill, and were suddenly assulted by spit-up. Jeez, they were a mess. Now somehow Mother Nature was messing around with goblins, and she thought it funny to make them react to Mandrill vomit. Why? I don't know, for giggles? Anyway, the goblins started to change. Like, skin turning to paint and painting a new form on the canvas of reality. So these goblins are different. They look more like freakin' snails. But they have several head. Flail-shaped head.
The Mandrill turned the goblins to Flail-snails.
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Oh and I almost forgot, while the kittens are resurrecting the dead and healing all wounds on everyone who feels the love of adorable cuteness some of them dress me in my clothes that I'm carrying.
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Very irate about my position, I contemplate upon the supernatural.
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I summon all the abandoned metal into one place (all the armor and weapons in the piles and not being held by someone), and melt it down into a solid metal block.
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Actually ferlock, I'm wearing my armour. :)
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I use my good hand to turn a goblin into a tourniquet for my wounded hand; and some clothes, for that matter.
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Actually ferlock, I'm wearing my armour. :)
That would explain how you got a dent in it. Thanks!
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Have I hurt anybody? Well I smash the ground again.
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Kyselina, you got bruised, maimed, broken, maimed again and were finally shot by an archer. You're rather dead at the moment.
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Can I still go spiritsh SMASH SMASH N CAUSE EARTHQUAKE TO PAWN DA GOBLINS WITH MA FLAIL ARMOR N SHIELD?
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No, I don't think so. You could try possessing your flail or learning to use an earthquake spell though.
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Or just wait for my limit break to resurrect you with kittens!
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I force Ioric to ressurect me then.
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Poke?
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I'm not sure how many people have posted their actions right now. Frankly, it's too late in the evening now for me to care. I'll try to get this done tomorrow.
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Alright, I'm a lazy bastard. But everyone has posted.
By the way, I've decided that Ioric's limit break, being so powerful, has detrimental effects as well. Everyone who witnesses it must make a saving throw against diabetes.
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If I get diabetes I turn myself into this next turn http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2007/01/455p5yp.jpg
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Hey, better to have diabetes than to be dead and in several separate pieces right?
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Come to think of it, I, instead of my previous action, will myself to explode, sending shrapnel everywhere, as I can't very well be doing this and running Roll to Tactucus.
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bump
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I think Boksi got tired of rolling? Someone should take over for him.
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I did once get as far as completing the limit breaks, but eh, complications. I guess I could hand the reins over, yeah, I don't have as much drive left.