Bay 12 Games Forum
Finally... => Life Advice => Topic started by: Kagus on November 16, 2009, 09:14:55 pm
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Couldn't think of a better topic title, and wasn't sure if this should go here or in General Discussion. Oh well.
Anyways, I have a problem... And, with my comparatively recent induction to Facebook (little over a year), it's been becoming more and more prominent.
I simply cannot do anything simple.
Here's what I mean... A "friend" (someone I met briefly and exchanged >7 words with, who then added me on Facebook) was having a birthday, and since I had no great animosity towards this person, I felt obliged to post a congratulation.
But can I do as all the other friends are doing, and simply say "Happy birthday! Have a good one"? NO. Instead, I must spend the next quarter-hour racking my brains and slamming my head into my keyboard while I think of something much more interesting and personalized.
So I rewrite "Badger badger badger badger", and then make a comment about wishing her a wonderful day and a survivable morning after. I was content with this, and apparently someone else decided that it was good enough to say "ditto" to.
And then, three days later, it's someone else's birthday. So, of course, I have to do something completely different. Everybody needs to get their own personal and unique greeting. I can only imagine how this is going to be next year...
I have the same thing for thank-you notes. I cannot bring myself to send something basic-yet-functional such as a simple "Hey, thanks for the (thing), --Kagus" or "Hey, happy birthday, --Kagus" or even "Hope your colonoscopy goes better this time, --KNUUURG". I always need to give it a personal touch, even if it takes me three days to do it.
Does anyone else have this problem? And yes, I refer to it as a problem, as it has eaten up a remarkable amount of my time and energy while providing very little in return. For every one of my personalized messages, fifteen other people say "Happy Birthday! :)" and probably get the same effect. And I don't even know these people, dammit!
Blargh.
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UGH...
This sort of thing just plagues me with birthday cards, either I have to write them or worse yet, send a thank-you note.
Your lucky you can actually manage something personalized(although rather zany), I usually end up feeling I made something 'too formal'.
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I'm boring, it's usually just "Happy Birthday ~[however I sign my name for that person]"
That's as personal as it gets, changing my signature for somebody.
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I don't even change my signature :P
My advice is to go back in time and stop yourself getting facebook, or failing that just set yourself a timelimit on how long you will spend thinking up a response if you go over force yourself to write a bland standard reply.
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Tip: Stop caring what other people think about you. Perhaps it helps.
I'm so looking for the perfect gift for every birthday and won't settle for less, resulting in me not having a present most of the time. Which is a lot worse than a crappy present, in most people's opinion. In my opinion, you either get me a great gift, or get me none at all because it's just a waste of money. Both ways both parties end up disappointed, so I now tend to evade birthdays, or let my better half take care of the whole present-thing...
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I can manage to do something generic if it's the only sane option, and usually I'm creative enough for this kind of thing to not be a problem anyway.
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What I write on birthday cards doesn't matter because my handwriting looks like tangled string.
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Some people are able to do this effortlessly. They can draw their shopping list instead of write it, etc. I think it's an unreasonable expectation unless it's easy for you. Since it's not, I wouldn't bother.
But you don't seem to be asking for advice. It's just a thing you do anyway even though it's difficult. So, I guess, good luck?
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1. The real problem is that you don't have enough to do.
If you did, you could wrap up a christmas card mad-quick.
2. I know personal cards are fun, but you don't have a system of making cards everybody. The time you spend wracking around just isn't worth it.
3. Spend your dam time on something that matters. I know you can do better than a greeting card, and faster too!
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What about doing like the guys that sell horoscopes in newspapers?
Write about 200 different greetings and just use a random function to pick one of them each time...
XD
I know what you mean though. We are used to read between lines, therefore we take great care in what information our messages convey.
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you think that's bad? My birthday was this monday, and I wrote a personalized thanks to (almost) all the people who congratulated me on facebook (actually a facebook clone, but nevermind that).
It was pretty much delliberate, though, to make it more "personal". I did resort to simple "Thanks!" when it was convenient.
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I don't know if I could manage that, I'd probably just cop out with a status update and maybe some responses to notable individuals. But then again, about three people commented on my last birthday, so it might not be that huge a deal.
As for effort involved, how else am I supposed to get better at it than by practice?
Heh heh... Really though, my only reason for doing this is that I feel "lesser" somehow if I just say something for the sake of saying something. I need to have a reason to say it. So, really, I'm not looking for a way to 'pretty up' a greeting, I'm looking for something that's just so witty and creative that I have to share it with them.
Well, theoretically speaking... And no, I'm not looking for advice. This is just who I am, and I don't think I'd be able to change it even if I wanted to. As it is, I'd much rather spend the time and effort in writing something worthwhile than having to live with myself after doing something mediocre or downright run-of-the-mill.
Not saying that I'll never give something simple, I'm just saying that I won't use it all the time. There are occasions when a simple and to-the-point message without frills is the most appropriate thing to say, and will be appreciated the most. For everything else, there's Maste head-banging.
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And no, I'm not looking for advice. This is just who I am, and I don't think I'd be able to change it even if I wanted to.
... Why did you start this thread, again?
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...because I wanted to know if anyone else had the same issue. Minor conversational topic. I suppose then it would have been better suited for General Discussion, but since this dealt with a personal aspect of myself I decided at the time that Life Advice would work just as well.
The logic does admittedly get a bit fuzzy around the whole "Advice" part of "Life Advice", but I didn't really feel that a non-advising thread would be breaching any new territory here. Also, I'd just spent a significant amount of time and energy devising a unique and personalized birthday greeting for someone, so my mind was probably still recovering.
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And no, I'm not looking for advice. This is just who I am, and I don't think I'd be able to change it even if I wanted to.
... Why did you start this thread, again?
We needed another thread to wildly derail.
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shush, he now accepts himself. As Freud would say, Dat ist schonn!
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Well thats one of the reasons why I don't like Facebook or all this other sites.
You get to "know" lots of people there without even knowing them.
It depersonalizes the whole socializing-thing.
But yes, I've once been on something similar, and I've always had to think days before I could do something as simple as a foto comment.
I'd always had to come up with something witty and couldn't be satisfied with something simple.
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I only add people who I know well on facebook. It's essentially a great big calendar for me, not an inane chatter thingy.
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It happens with me with writing stuff down onto paper. I can't for the life of me think of anything interesting or witty to say. Its extremely frustrating when you have to write something fast, and then end up writing the most lame thing ever.
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What about doing like the guys that sell horoscopes in newspapers?
Write about 200 different greetings and just use a random function to pick one of them each time...
XD
I know what you mean though. We are used to read between lines, therefore we take great care in what information our messages convey.
so pick what you want to say between the lines, the find something that fits.
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For my dad's birthday, on the front of the card I wrote "Happy Birthday!" in binary, ascii, and Japanese, all hand written. Then on inside I wrote the whole message in both English and Japanese.