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Messages - TFBeyond

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1
DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: Mystery of the missing queen
« on: April 23, 2012, 01:53:37 pm »
Sounds like it could be entertaining once inheritance is fixed...

"The peasant is dead! Long live the king!"

2
DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: how to best utilise cave crocodiles
« on: April 08, 2012, 06:42:09 am »
Quote from: KodKod on April 07, 2012, 10:23:21 pm
Quote from: SRD on April 07, 2012, 09:06:43 pm
Yeah you cant spawn rutherers at all for some reason

I wanted to test it but couldn't find Rutherers in the list. :( Had some fun with epic battles (and dragons) instead.

You need to remove their [ARENA_RESTRICTED] tag, then you can use them in the arena just fine.

Why does that tag exist in the first place? I thought the whole point of the arena was to put together whatever insanely specific matchup you wanted!

3
DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: Melancholy vampire...
« on: March 27, 2012, 05:14:17 am »
In these modern times, apparently the correct thing to do with a melancholy vampire is to make them star in a series of questionably-written books and poorly-acted movie adaptations.

Aside from that... I dunno. 1Z "cliff" for her to throw herself off of, and land on a pressure plate for all eternity? Ideally linked up to some sort of rudimentary clock to set your fort's timetable by.

It's 14 vampthuds past noon.

4
DF Adventure Mode Discussion / Re: Bronze colossus lower body & Platinum maul: Surprisingly bad weapons
« on: March 19, 2012, 04:18:12 am »
Quote from: Hotaru on March 18, 2012, 11:37:30 pm

...Impaledlocks was a steelclad sperm whale man...

...he fought an unremarkable novice human by bashing it repeatedly in the lower body. The human was unconscious most of the time, hence test was ethical...

I love these forums.

5
DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: A 'natural' cavern or a large, smooth shaft?
« on: October 23, 2011, 07:21:17 am »
Purely artificial, as a statement of dwarven might.

(Also, ohhhhhh MY.)

6
Roll To Dodge / Re: Roll To Roll To Dodge: A Meta-Adventure [Turn 124: Five Schmucks Without A Clue]
« on: October 20, 2011, 08:27:35 am »
Quote from: dermonster on October 20, 2011, 08:25:41 am
Quote from: TFBeyond on October 19, 2011, 02:23:42 pm
Also, Derm, you are an unholy monster. Spawned from the blackest abyss and dropped into this otherwise comparitively innocent endeavour, specifically to cause chaos, mayhem, pain, loss and confusion. Carry on the good work.

Thank you, thank you!

And then it turns out I'm the final boss and ALLACCORDINGTOPLAN.

This makes too much sense not to be true. Damnit, Derm! Spoilers!

7
Roll To Dodge / Re: Roll To Roll To Dodge: A Meta-Adventure [Turn 124: Five Schmucks Without A Clue]
« on: October 19, 2011, 02:23:42 pm »
Nooo...! It can't end now, I just finished reading! ;_;

FAKEEDIT: This thread is hilarious. I have no idea how you keep up with it all and forge ahead at the same time.

Also, Derm, you are an unholy monster. Spawned from the blackest abyss and dropped into this otherwise comparitively innocent endeavour, specifically to cause chaos, mayhem, pain, loss and confusion. Carry on the good work.

Frelock, you are perhaps the unluckiest sonofa- that ever lived. Sorry about that.

Divide, keep on Dorfin'. You're doing the mountainhome proud... I think.

HEN... never have I seen so much owed by so many to so few a mop.

Monk - I can't decide whether you're an awesome or a terrible MacGuyver. Please advise.

and finally Gatleos... you've got the patience of a saint, the processing power of a mainframe and the twisted imagination of a mad genius. Bravo.

8
DF Adventure Mode Discussion / Re: What's your favourite way to kill?
« on: September 29, 2011, 01:19:59 am »
Quote from: Bdthemag on September 28, 2011, 09:21:40 pm
I prefer to kill my enemies as painless as possible, straight to the heart or brain for me. After all, no true gentlemen would force their worthy adversaries to endure a long painful death.

...I don't understand what you just said.

9
DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: Greatest/Worst embark ever.
« on: September 19, 2011, 06:14:59 am »
As for "worst embark ever", I would've thought one of those one where the wagon ends up parked on a frozen river moments before it unthaws would count...

10
DF General Discussion / Least threatening forgotten beasts
« on: June 01, 2010, 02:16:31 pm »
With the sheer randomness of the creature generator, sometimes the forgotten beasts aren't so much "Eldritch Horror" as "Eldritch Hilarity".

http://img339.imageshack.us/img339/1889/dwarffortress2010060120.jpg

So... it's an uncomfortable snowball?
Scour your Legends, and post up the most pathetic examples of ancient "doom" that you can find :)

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