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Messages - JackOSpades

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1
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Silly/Useless Magical Items
« on: August 04, 2014, 06:27:44 am »
 One Ring of Lag: once worn by Slowron the Great this magical Ring randomly reduces the wearers movement speed and initiative by 99% it's description reads: one ring to bring them all and in molasses bind them.

 Mantle of Importance: this cape makes the wearer extremely Important but only to themselves.

 Boots of Groundwalking these boots allow the wearer to walk across dirt or stone as though it were a solid surface.

 Amulet of Omnipresence the amulet cause the wearer to suddenly be everywhere all at once, it does not however increase their overall mass making the process rather violent.

 Staff of Infection: all open wounds inflicted by this weapon fester and rot, it deals blunt damage.

 Coin of Commemorization this gold coin has no monetary value to anyone and cannot be melted down it exists merely reminds the holder of the significance of whatever event caused them to gain possession of the coin.

2
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Corrupt a wish!
« on: July 07, 2014, 04:05:08 am »

 Granted, it's to get an Achievement.

I wish for more days a year when it's socially and legally acceptable to set off large explosions in the sky. 

3
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Weaponize it.
« on: July 05, 2014, 09:30:42 pm »

 Light the foxes on fire and then release them into the wheat fields of thine enemies such that they might find themselves without food come winter time.

baby powder.

4
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Weaponize it.
« on: July 05, 2014, 08:24:24 pm »
Quote
The tomato is the edible, often red fruit/berry of the nightshade Solanum lycopersicum,[1][2] commonly known as a tomato plant.
since they come from the same genius splicing them together using ether genetic modification, cross pollination, or grafting with Atropa belladonna would be a distinct possibility.

 Cheese.

5
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Corrupt a wish!
« on: June 16, 2014, 02:34:03 pm »

Granted, they Immediately Explode in your hand because they are on !!Fire!!

I wish to win all the Japanese bloodsports Gameshows I will be forced to compete in.

6

 I am contractually obligated to say don't name a girl Jack unless you add an I or Y to the end.
any other boys name would be fine however maby Bill or Ted or Bobby...

you know what a Girl named Bobby is just gender unspecific enough to work for everyone. yea compromise maby?

7
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Corrupt a wish!
« on: June 16, 2014, 02:18:55 pm »

granted the Prophet of Catastrophe Hope pays you a visit unfortunately he really hasn't been the same since marketing made him re-brand himself to appeal to a wider audience...
turns out you get to be part of an inspirational story of the week as you fight to overcome brain damage just as soon as you look over there what? oh don't mind the sledge hammer it's purely ceremonial.

I wish for translated Japanese bloodsports Gameshows.

8
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Corrupt a wish!
« on: June 16, 2014, 07:25:09 am »

 Granted you get burritos made with 100% bison meat, enjoy.

I wish for a larger selection of domesticated meat animals.

9
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Corrupt a wish!
« on: June 15, 2014, 08:43:56 am »

Granted, It's awesome the snipers love how good a target it makes and your hat is the last thing on your mind before you die.

I wish real life worked on a system of regenerating health but video games did not.

10
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Suggestion game: Pirates
« on: June 15, 2014, 08:39:55 am »
Now that they've paid us a visit and found out about our particular brand of "hospitality", we'd better do the same for them. Lay them aboard and take their ship! Afterward, we should apply some real piratey "persuasion" to the wounded guy they left aboard our ship and find out who they were and who they were working for.

+1

we should 'greet' our kin in the way customary to our people, with crossed swords and gunfire.
cause these are ether some cheeky pirates who've set up right outside the port (not a bad Idea if there be no military presence to chase them off) or those dock workers are far more persistent than anyone would have a right to expect.

I could have sworn that's exactly what I said 29 was, seriously does no one speak pirate? oh well GM confirmation is always good, at least I know I was right. although it would have been hilarious if it had been something besides how many pirates we had, like a team number, or a tattoo, or how long we had til our number was up.

11
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Corrupt a wish!
« on: June 14, 2014, 02:31:29 am »

Granted, you get some product advertisement games from NesQuiktm

I wish product advertisement game were actually good.

12

 Anything but the water type, there are always so many of them in Pokemon games they were ether Gamefreaks favorite or they just wanted everyone to hate them as much as they do.  :-\

13
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Corrupt a wish!
« on: June 13, 2014, 09:16:22 am »

 granted it's released through your body and your corpse gets hooked up to the power grid to act as a backup battery.

I wish i knew why this feels like deja vu?

14
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Corrupt a wish!
« on: June 13, 2014, 09:00:41 am »

 Granted, it's done entirely in Japanese and then only released in the Ukraine.

I wish less focus was given to multi-player in general.

15
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Weaponize it.
« on: June 13, 2014, 08:57:22 am »
Ripping it to shreds and using it as a smoke screen.

Dirt.

use it to cause Infections.

the sound of a lawn mower at 6AM

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