1036
Roll To Dodge / Re: Roll to destroy the GM - He hates your face.
« on: January 27, 2014, 08:01:45 pm »
recreate GM stick. Use it to derail by a megaton FIVE HENDERSONS!
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1037
Roll To Dodge / Re: The Grand Feast - Fall of the Multiverse - LOADING.
« on: January 27, 2014, 07:56:49 pm »
WHUPS
Turn -0.1
Heinrik was doing his usual sunday business - negotiating with the Neo-Fascist party for more illegal armaments. he couldn't NOT have his Mk. IV grenade launcher, damnit!
"Look, you give me the weapon, and I don't fuckin' blow up your house, deal?"
They were scared. Heinrik knew they were scared, he does that to people. But when they dont give him what he wants, his head throbs. And Heinrik likes it less when his head throbs. The killing. It makes it go away. But he can't kill these people. He needs them, and besides, they're the only ones he can relate too. But if he doesnt get what he wants, he might black out again. And nobody wants that.
Get my damn Mk. IV Grenade Launcher.
Turn -0.1
Heinrik was doing his usual sunday business - negotiating with the Neo-Fascist party for more illegal armaments. he couldn't NOT have his Mk. IV grenade launcher, damnit!
"Look, you give me the weapon, and I don't fuckin' blow up your house, deal?"
They were scared. Heinrik knew they were scared, he does that to people. But when they dont give him what he wants, his head throbs. And Heinrik likes it less when his head throbs. The killing. It makes it go away. But he can't kill these people. He needs them, and besides, they're the only ones he can relate too. But if he doesnt get what he wants, he might black out again. And nobody wants that.
Get my damn Mk. IV Grenade Launcher.
1038
Einsteinian Roulette / Re: Einsteinian Roulette: Repair and Rescue
« on: January 27, 2014, 07:49:53 pm »
((Well, if we have a sub forum, we can just make an OOC thread for each current thread. Like my grandma always said, the more threads you have, the warmer the sweater. Or something like that.))
1039
Roll To Dodge / Re: Ancient Egyptian Zombie Apocalypse (Open to suggestions!)
« on: January 27, 2014, 07:46:15 pm »
> PRIMARY ACTION(S):
Fix Pommel [9+1(profession, kinda)]
SHLEEEP
You use the scraps leftover from your sack making to fix the pommel of the sword, fastening it with the rest of the wax from the jars. Then you lay all your equipment near you, stuff the last bits of cloth in your ears to block the incessant moaning, and fall asleep. [RESTED]
You wake up the next morning, the first thing you notice is the... is that sunlight? I thought there weren't any windo- SHIT!
you scramble backwards against the wall, noticing the gaping hole in the top of your barricade. It's steadily growing bigger, but right now it's only about 2' wide at the very top, where you can see hands pulling at the stuff you piled up in front. It seems most of your guests left, but a few decided that here was as good as anywhere, and stayed. It looks like you have about one hour before that comes completely down, what'll you do?
> INVENTORY UPDATE:
(1) 3m length folded fabric (1.5) kg
(1) 3'6" hardwood cane (.75) kg
(1) Rough Tunic (1) kg
(2) Sandals (.5) kg
(1) Silk Headress (.25) kg
(1) Recurve Bow {Strongpull, Requires a Strength check as well as Accuracy. If 6+/-, +/- 2 to acc. roll} (2) kg
(24) Barbed Bronzehead Bamboo Arrows (2.4) kg
(1) Bronze 2 1/2 foot Saber (3.5) kg
(2) 2 ltr. Jugs (1.0) kg
(3) Loafs Hard Bread (.6) kg
TOTAL WEIGHT: (13.5) kg
EFFECTS:
Well rested - [+2] to dex rolls, you are more focused
Overburdened - [-2/3] to rolls
Fix Pommel [9+1(profession, kinda)]
SHLEEEP
You use the scraps leftover from your sack making to fix the pommel of the sword, fastening it with the rest of the wax from the jars. Then you lay all your equipment near you, stuff the last bits of cloth in your ears to block the incessant moaning, and fall asleep. [RESTED]
You wake up the next morning, the first thing you notice is the... is that sunlight? I thought there weren't any windo- SHIT!
you scramble backwards against the wall, noticing the gaping hole in the top of your barricade. It's steadily growing bigger, but right now it's only about 2' wide at the very top, where you can see hands pulling at the stuff you piled up in front. It seems most of your guests left, but a few decided that here was as good as anywhere, and stayed. It looks like you have about one hour before that comes completely down, what'll you do?
> INVENTORY UPDATE:
(1) 3m length folded fabric (1.5) kg
(1) 3'6" hardwood cane (.75) kg
(1) Rough Tunic (1) kg
(2) Sandals (.5) kg
(1) Silk Headress (.25) kg
(1) Recurve Bow {Strongpull, Requires a Strength check as well as Accuracy. If 6+/-, +/- 2 to acc. roll} (2) kg
(24) Barbed Bronzehead Bamboo Arrows (2.4) kg
(1) Bronze 2 1/2 foot Saber (3.5) kg
(2) 2 ltr. Jugs (1.0) kg
(3) Loafs Hard Bread (.6) kg
TOTAL WEIGHT: (13.5) kg
EFFECTS:
Well rested - [+2] to dex rolls, you are more focused
Overburdened - [-2/3] to rolls
1040
Einsteinian Roulette / Re: Einsteinian Roulette: Repair and Rescue
« on: January 27, 2014, 07:33:05 pm »
((I vote for a sub-forum for ER so that we can have a OOC thread, because it really derails everything. I mean, how much faster could we do things without philosophical discussions about religion, technological advancements and the like? I +1 this. Alot.))
1041
Roll To Dodge / Re: Remembered Heroes: Now with more updates! (FH 2.0)
« on: January 27, 2014, 07:28:57 pm »
Everyone
Before you start your actions, a voice comes over the new vox system being erected in the tent city -
"Astartes, your presence is requested by the Lord Commander at the Command tent. Further information will be given there."
All Guardsmen not on current patrol, ration, or camp deployment area are ordered to the Parade ground, Commissariat, please report as well."
Hmm, seems something big is happening. If your'e not being attacked... Then there is only one option...
The guardsmen in your vicinity stop their actions, heading towards the deployment grounds in the center of the Base. You also notice a few Marines in the distance heading towards the command tent near the Valkyrie you landed on.
Updated Locations
Before you start your actions, a voice comes over the new vox system being erected in the tent city -
"Astartes, your presence is requested by the Lord Commander at the Command tent. Further information will be given there."
All Guardsmen not on current patrol, ration, or camp deployment area are ordered to the Parade ground, Commissariat, please report as well."
Hmm, seems something big is happening. If your'e not being attacked... Then there is only one option...
The guardsmen in your vicinity stop their actions, heading towards the deployment grounds in the center of the Base. You also notice a few Marines in the distance heading towards the command tent near the Valkyrie you landed on.
Updated Locations
Spoiler: Dave Phillips (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Corran Thule (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Derek Johnson (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Mask Wolf (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Vandar (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Alexis Kitty (click to show/hide)
1042
Roll To Dodge / Re: Remembered Heroes: Now with more updates! (FH 2.0)
« on: January 27, 2014, 07:14:28 pm »
((Shit, forgot your updated locations and stuff. Oh well, I'll post them in this next update.))
1043
Roll To Dodge / Re: New Age Mercenaries (OOC Thread)
« on: January 27, 2014, 07:13:09 pm »
Wait, can you clarify a bit? I notice a torpedo? Is it aimed at me? Already fired? WTF?!?!
1044
Roll To Dodge / Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Enraged Twerking
« on: January 27, 2014, 07:07:36 pm »FTFY+1+1Weren't we supposed to read books to Grate, instead of trying to make a toddler read military strategy books himself?
That... was my intention, yes.
Don't give up on our little warlord! Read the books to him, and demonstrate effective strategies for him. Make it into a game and get some little toy army men to demonstrate things more effectively. Make sure to also get toenail clippers, so that we can realistically demonstrate the effects of mortar fire.
((When I was four, I actually did that. I'm told that I got angry at my mom for tossing the severed limbs away, because they were necessary for the battlefield.))
((I remember smashing up army men with rocks in the backyard, to simulate heavy shelling.))
For the game, make it historical scenarios, with accurate terrain and troop counts (/100 or something). Put Grate on the losing side every time, and give him basic information on what his men can do. When he wins, reward him. When he loses, PUNCH THE LIVING HELL OUTA THE LITTLE SHIT at him.
1045
Roll To Dodge / Re: Glorious Ape Empire RTD
« on: January 27, 2014, 07:06:49 pm »
Climb down to ground floor, and bow to mech. Initiate Ritualized Combat. Assume Crouching Ape stance.
1046
Roll To Dodge / Re: ROLL TO BADGER (Killing Nerds and Drowning Bears)
« on: January 27, 2014, 07:05:04 pm »
Climb onto the nerd's chest and recreate the scene from Indiana Jones and rip his heart out. 'Cus Im'a honey badger, and I giveth no shits.
1047
Roll To Dodge / Re: Ancient Egyptian Zombie Apocalypse (Open to suggestions!)
« on: January 27, 2014, 12:53:12 pm »
> PRIMARY ACTION(s)
MAKE BAG [5-1+2 (profession)]
FIND WATER [9-1]
MAKE BOWSTRING [11+2(profession)]
Your attempt to make a bag fails, as when you cut the fabric it rips, leaving you with not enough of a solid piece to make the bag. You do manage to find another length of fabric, though, so maybe you could try again. Then, you search the storage area for supplies. You find a pair of 2 liter jugs full of wine, and drink the remains of a third. THIRST QUENCHED
You then turn your attempts to bowstring making, out of the remains of the fabric and some wax that sealed some of the jars. You make a masterful string, pulled extremely taught, requiring great strength to fire. But, it provides huge amounts of penetration and accuracy when fired correctly. Your sword still doesn't have a grip, though.
MAKE BAG [5-1+2 (profession)]
FIND WATER [9-1]
MAKE BOWSTRING [11+2(profession)]
Your attempt to make a bag fails, as when you cut the fabric it rips, leaving you with not enough of a solid piece to make the bag. You do manage to find another length of fabric, though, so maybe you could try again. Then, you search the storage area for supplies. You find a pair of 2 liter jugs full of wine, and drink the remains of a third. THIRST QUENCHED
You then turn your attempts to bowstring making, out of the remains of the fabric and some wax that sealed some of the jars. You make a masterful string, pulled extremely taught, requiring great strength to fire. But, it provides huge amounts of penetration and accuracy when fired correctly. Your sword still doesn't have a grip, though.
1048
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Corrupt a wish!
« on: January 27, 2014, 12:32:16 pm »
Granted, you always roll 6's.
I wish for the next three wishes to involve fishes, and to rhyme to help pass the time.
I wish for the next three wishes to involve fishes, and to rhyme to help pass the time.
1049
Roll To Dodge / Re: Roll to destroy the GM - He hates your face.
« on: January 27, 2014, 12:28:36 pm »
Create metal rod, name it the "GMstick". Beat GM with the GM stick whenever he defies me.
1050
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Rate the avatar of the person above you!
« on: January 27, 2014, 11:31:47 am »
10/10 - 2/10 for being mildly disturbing. 8/10