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Messages - dragdeler

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421
Sorry for doublepost but this way you notice it quicker:

If I were you I'd get microsoft download manager, no freeware/adware/trialware, it's not 20 years old (only 12 ^^), looks really straightfoward. Can't seem to find it from MS themselves any longer (they'd peddle it to you through windows store anyway) but on softonic and the likes it can still be found.

422
I'll have a look then, most likely what will happen if I find something that works, either I'll find you an archive where you can DL the whole cd, or I'll send you a shady link with only the relevant installer (which is much more efficient but not great practice ^^)

423
I can give old computer magazine cds a go? Might be broken because of that newfangled https... But there is a solid chance they will work and launch on win10-11 and they sure as shit will not be some free trial BS but rather winXP-ass UI  :D.

424
I was allready betting on beef before I was done reading, sounds yummy.



It's more of a random thought but whatever, kittens are cute and stuff sure, but where it's really at is some big old cat that appreciates you. I think about this because I saw the post on reddit about mackerel, and I thought damn people have no taste, to litterally exchange the most glorious years against a kitten that needs to be pottytrained and could turn out to be an asshole. To these people a cat must literally be a decoration object... So anyway I'm posting in happy because our nextdoor neighbours both passed around spring, and we have this tabby that allways loved our yard, when the sun is setting you will find minou on the porch... If it were only up to me I'd have given in and the let the cat inside a long time ago but regardless... For now the cat still seems to have access to it's old house, but we started feeding it more regularl, not just a little threat when there is some leftover... It has allways been a super shy cat, but ever since I'm getting big squints, she will even stay around if I do some manual labor that makes noises that could be annoying to cats (like I doubt they enjoy hearing the hissing of a gas flame). Yesterday when I put food in the bowl she allmost rubbed herself against me but then didn't because we have this mutual agrrment of polite distance. Big old cats are peak cat!

425
Oof yeah don't use them, but I can absolutely see how providing a simple straightforward download manager just isn't something the google frontpage does anymore.

426
I had it when going to bed and I had it when waking up, I wonder if I had the hiccups during sleep.There can be no evolutionary advantage to it, it's just plain torture.


427
how could one possibly believe in creatonism or intelligent design, in a world in which the hiccups exist

428
am dumb

429
Forget about the cute motivational posters it hangs up in it's teenage room, the thing will full on disperse political slogans in otherwise innocous prompts. "Vocofee is no bo lacoree!" Need I say more?! No because the insinuation of covfefe is obvious. Are we just going to tolerate that our children be indoctrinated like that? I' "is sail you you seaicar... Excuse you??!?! I'm all for staying with the times but that "yo" has actual demon horns sticking out it's right side, wake up people.

Tant my ƒ now is it, was it Gherile[Unown (#201) in a wheelchair emoji]? (presumably Gherile Sanefelt)

430
General Discussion / Re: Dreadful emptyness
« on: July 04, 2023, 09:18:10 pm »
You're kidding, none of those bums could have lifted themselves up by the bootstraps like Lordbaal, talk about a provider. In situations where everybody is constrained to try hard, stoicism is a given, in such an environment compliments are rare, any dramatic expression of emotions really. You know it, even the kid intuitively grasped the general status. Idk if there is any amount of reassurance that can restore innocence. You can see it in old people who seen rough times, they never stopped having a stock of food for worse times. To know that everything can crumble down in an instant, and not try be prepared would be reckless now wouldn't it.

Everything you have, you more than deserved it. Try to enjoy the good things while they last, even if that feels unfamiliar, even if it stays good indefinitly and yet never becomes familiar, that's not some personal failure, thats just how you got wired, and reprogramming oneself is only realistic to an extent. I get it:


Quote
If anything, I'm more worthy alive than dead, as long I have a job at least.

It's terrible what we are constrained to believe, it doesn't matter if it's right or wrong and wether we think it is right or not... Some notions like that have to whole world in a chokehold, wether we want it or not. All I can advise is not to pay attention to it. Your family will be devastated without you, they will end up finding their footing financially, they might not even have a second to spare a thought to you until then, but when they do it will dawn on them that dad had some other qualities that are irreplacable, and that they would probably trade it all back for you. I say that because yes it would be true in many cases, but you strike me as a case where that would be particularly true. **

You know when my dad suffered his head injury in the hospital I was absolutely convinced that life and health is worth all the other stuff ten times over... Then when it was difficult in rehabilitation that certainty wasn't allways readily recallable. We are ten years later now, and he usually drives me nuts but still we can thank the heavens he is still with us, just the other day he told me about helping an 92 old down the stairs, and you know in my mind he is the frail one now, and that kinda blew my mind how much life he still has before him, hopefully. If I die before him he probably won't be able to help carrying my coffin and I bet he'd be kinda mad about it (don't think I'll have a coffin lol, but I have no will yet sooo)... but like who the fuck cares right?!


** IDK why I'm thinking about this now, but the other day I was talking with my mom about a guy who comes a lot to the parc to search for useful scrap, and I happened to mention something he told me about his dad, and somehow that led to me saying, "oh no he lost his dad very young, I think that man has been buried since the 70's" and my mom didn't say a lot after that, but I knew it endeared him to her that he's still taking such good care of the grave 50 years laters... my mom lost her mom at 16, my dad lost his dad at 8 that shit obsesses me because it's deep in my genetic makeup I think... Only girl I ever chose to have a serious relationship with lost her father as well at 15, goes to show you. Trust me this stuff runs way further than our mortal husks ever will.

431
General Discussion / Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« on: July 04, 2023, 08:07:16 pm »
Life hygiene isn't trivial it'll take an outrageous amount of time out of your day, oftentimes to the point that in practical terms it becomes some either or blackmail shit. Then you listen to some billionaire or hustle guru describe their day, and turns they can afford the luxury to be like 3/4 of their daily routine entirely dedicated to self care.


Also the beach thing sound rough, I'll take industrial noises or the military training grounds shooting over strangers talking next to my window. Forget about fomo it's just plain anxiogenic.





I hurt my foot my second day off, twisted it real bad, I never hurt myself twisting something because I'm super flexible, but I got way too used to wearing the heavy steel capped shoes that prevent you from twisting your foot... waited a few days before resigning myself to go to the hospital, they were kinda like why are you here if it doesn't hurt more, but I got the x-ray my family insisted I needed to have, no fracture and they told me the red streak along the sole was blood that had deposited itself because I tore the capsule of the articulation? I got a week sick time off. Then I had 4 more days of PTO lined up, not exactly a whole week... That I'm kind of annoyed to take, I'd rather be sick at work and healthy when I'm off tbh (fuck everything) but I also need, I went two days and it was stupid, the kind of stubborn stupidness only I can be. Impossible to put weight on it, way more impossible to put weight on it in the uneven ground scenarios that careless entitled visitors leave us with. I should be fighting for my workers rights and insist it be counted as sick time but wth... too many chronically sick colleagues abusing the system it's pride thing at this point ("at least I'm no Jürgen").

I think it was a good thing that I hurt my foot, it forced me to dedicate my PTO to actual rest. Because when I'm off I'm going actually mad because those few precious days where my thougts aren't polluted, and I'm not just coping need to be taken advantage of to the max. To tell you I have been making it an habit to never tell anybody I know IRL when I'm off, because I really feel like I have no time to loose on social obligations... Used to have this hack: just jumpstart the week by cleaning, feel good about yourself and go from there; doesn't quite cut it anymore when there is like 1-3 hecking cubic meters of selected *not* ewaste. Man there is like a famous hardware flaw on the ps2 slim, where the dvd player will stop working because some sort of plastic bit doesn't push well on some other piece when shutting the lid I got like 9 of those to do... I litterally have 3 jailbreakable ps4 in perfect working state. Hecking cubic meters, I keep getting pickier, throwing shit away over less (trying to apply cost of opportunity logic), making more space anytime I'm off but the pile keeps rising. All of this isn't particularely conducive to my mental well being, and it's been a while I couldn't shake the general attitude of "I really don't give a fuck anymore, I don't need any of y'all I could keep myself busy for months with a mere solderiron, so much room for me to grow and learn there, such barren repetition interaction with other humans offer me instead".

That's the usual shit, but this year comes with it's special challenges. Still haven't forgiven our analogue of the DMV that they can't fucking stop showing disdain to their customers for a second to give one the test in the language one asked for. So reacquiring my driving license is basically out of the picture because just thinking about that institution takes me down a hatespiral that might ruin more than one day - with all the anecdotal evidence I see every fucking day of people that would instantly fail their practical driving exam?! Give. Me. A. Fucking. Break. Still I'm glad I don't have drive myself anymore, I allways hated it, it allways felt super high stakes, I never took my car anywhere but work anyway because I was too scared... So I set out to something really hard instead. Of course I'm still nowhere near to riding a recumbent quadricycle to work. In spring the project took a big hit first it was me trying to be budget conscious about getting rims onto a wheelhub. At this point I'd be happy if somebody could just fucking tell me: "yeah, I'll do it no problem, but it will cost you". No no, the current state of the game is: organize means to get to some rando bikeshop in person to show them the artifact of UnToLd MeChAnIcAl CoMpLeXiTy be told if the only mofo in the shop who can actually do this kind of work "is currently out - me personally idk" or "they'll have to see but they're allready booked out for weeks".

At this point I kinda don't care anymore  :(. The foot thing took the spite out of me. I mean I would still send the foot flying at 20000kmh so that it and it's target shatters into a fine mist, if I could, just to prove a point, but what is the point actually? I'm doomed, you're doomed, everybody gets a doomed. I knew why I never booked too much PTO back to back, there is only so much mental sanity I can restore without being utterly distraught to see it ripped from me the first day I show up because the conspiracy of randomness and entitled cockroaches needs to suck any semblance out of rest of your bone marrow, like I went two days, what sort of surprises could they reserve for me in that short amount of time? Today I dealt with a guy being pissy because the company who mows around our parcs hit the jackpot, edge cutter projected a small stone I kid you not across the whole fucking breadth of the asphalt, car was nowhere near where the dude was cutting his grass but it shattered an entire window like it was nothing. Our company wasn't liable (of course no good answer from above as usual) the gardeners were two young dudes who were compliant and polite, but didn't know how to deal with it had to call around half their office blablablablabla useless shit, and of course language barrier thrown into the mix for good measure. Can't just have a normal day especially not anywhere near PTO, if it's not the visitors' absentmindedness or bad faith, the laws of physics will litterally start to conspire to conjure up some plain unbelievable shit.

Anyway I was saying I kinda don't care anymore: I gave up on regaining some sense of autonomy this year. One would have thought that the metals brackets I'm having custom made to join my frame to the rear axle cage would have been the toughest to acquire but no... In 50 years we went from normal ass family fathers having thread cutters at home and spokes all being sold at the same length to 90% of the people who work in bicycle shops couldn't do it. I sunk thousands of euros, there is several cardboard boxes with parts stacked on top of the electronics. I'm so exhausted. Just buying my groceries requires an act of state and work is allways there to sour the mood. It's not rocket science, definitly not, when I used to think about it more I could visualise the quadricycle down to the last details, in 3d in my head, the RAM requirements of the object were to heavy and the image could not be upheld indefinitly. Now it feels like half the shit eludes me allready. I kinda don't want to deal with it anymore.

It needs to be done. They don't get to toy with my mobility like that and I want those steel capped leather clubs for legs so that if need be I can make anybody understand that these boots are made for walking, get the fuck out of my way. I should wear my working shoes anywhere, then I would not have twisted my foot, it's precisely because I never leave the house for anywhere but work, that my feet were not prepared for those light running shoes. I needed that break, but it's not about what I need, it's about what I want. guuuh !O&))$=#"/)"!%#

432
Hmmmm... Evidently this is hard to take on picture, the glass allways gets in the way, and the sun is going down anyway but there it is. I tried to focus on color accuracy and not sharpness obviously, but invevitably this allready went through several translation layers before reaching somebody else's eye, I just hope it was all png at least and not jpg.

I guess I found it on the paint colorpalett, it's like somewhere in the yellow circle. But it would seem that we are particularly bad at perceiving nuances at that particular spot of the spectrum... Honestly it all just looks grey down there, not even brown.


433
I saw the technology connections video  :D but honestly if brown isn't a real color that makes it more confusing that those different tints would aggregate around it. How come this isn't observed more often with all kinds of transculent materials? I might upload some pics later in the evening.

434
Aren't red and green pretty much at opposite ends of the color spectrum? How can a liquid be green if reflecting light, golden green when staining paper, dark red when the sun shines through, and become milky/mocca when adding water? I know they're all just hues of brown, and thats where they join eachother in a dimmly lit room it looks so brown its allmost black, it's still incredibly perplexing.

435
General Discussion / Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« on: July 01, 2023, 03:33:10 pm »
I don't think you got played? In essence what was agreed upon ended up being exactly the thing that happened? In essence you agreed to pay strangers groceries, guess they had insane charisma to pass that speech check. Does it really matter if they were homeless, destitute or shameless?

Even when I had little money to spend I allways lived by the motto 50 bucks is totally worth finding out who someone is: they screw you over you know not to spend another nickel or thought. I guess if we take everybody into the discussion in an urban setting, that might become ruinous quickly unless you know how to physically shake them, hope you brought your running shoes lol, especially if the first one manages to squeeze out a multiple of that. That people will take a foot if you give them an inch is to be expected, sadly.

Anyway, she went for it and you didn't establish a boundary when you had enough, what might have been smooth to say is: "hey, my fridge isn't as full as that either, let's move on before I get jealous and we split the bag at the exit". Remember, you can just leave. I- I probably shouldn't mention in but I seem to recall some stuff you shared years back, and the cosmetic products might have given me sort of a cosmic giggle in that situation.

Ironically, if you didn't care if she spent it on drugs or gambling or what have you, it would have been way simpler to set a limit. On the brightside I doubt she is undercutting the supermarket shampoo, whom to, other beggars? A sorority of lazy bums? In a way all equally needy aren't they? Might as well stockpile it and not spend money later?  #strategic Speaking of which if lack of housing was a requirement you might just have raised an eyebrow at the opportune moment to ask "refrigeration?"... In any case if they try to make a scen,e again, you can just leave, if that's too hard/ being made to hard... you can be passive aggressive: "sigh, I'm neither rich nor do I have time for this game, also you just used up all of my trust" take twenty quid fold them into a ball "whats better? the pidgeon on the roof or the sparrow in the hand?" toss ball of money way, preferably behind or under a shelf, actually run away. I mean it seems you had time to come up with something ^^? I know I'm writing showerarguments again... but to bring it to completion: she followes you instead of going for the money, I would full on go on the offensive: "YOU SPIT ON TWENTY QUIDS? YOU ARE NO BEGGAR STAY YOUR DISTANCE BONNIE!" Come on now you wouldn't make a fool of yourself in public like that, that shit is reserved to me, and I don't enjoy it either. It was probably one of the better outcomes. You still got your banccontact card, right :P?!

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