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I'm gonna feel really stupid for asking this, but what is that?

Moderation log, pinned at the top of General Discussion.

Listening to the Payday soundtrack and headbanging to the Diamond Heist music. It's only £1 on Steam, get it. Also, the game. Is good, ja.

I swear I'll update this, but don't expect it until mid January. Coursework comes first.

I just realised I've been avoiding spoilers about the Hobbit movie. Gorram it, I've read the book like a dozen times. I know what happens.

Story time!

One day, in the small, isolated town of Etria, an underground forest was discovered. The Radha, governors of Etria, issued a proclamation throughout the continent... Any able bodied adventurer was invited to investigate the forest and explore its depths. But no matter how many came to investivate the dungeon, none gaiend the renown they sought. As more adventurers tried and failed to conquer it, it came to be known by a new name... The Yggdrasil Labyrinth. You are the latest adventurer to journey to Etria in response to the Radha's proclamation. You have but one goal: explore the forest to win fame and fortune. Etria is at hand...


So here's Etria. Clearly, we have to go into the Explorers Guild first. We're greeted by this fellow.


"Haven't seen you before... I figure you came to check out the Yggdrasil Labyrinth. Then welcome, friend. Not many guilds lately are admitting new adventurers. These shortsighted losers care too much about trifles to do any real investigation. If you've got the guts, you should make a guild entirely for newcomers. There are loads of guys just sitting on their thumbs, who'd join any guild that'd take them."

I don't think we have any choice, so I make a guild.

"Great, then let's get started. Write what you want to call your guild in this ledger. Someday the world will know this name, so think carefully before choosing it."

Since I forgot to ask for ideas, I called it Bay 12. I'm unimaginitive, sue me.

"Bay 12, huh? Not a bad name. Now that you've got a guild, you'll need adventurers to fill it. Of course, you can go into the Labyrinth yourself."

Now why would I do that when I have suckers to do it for me?

"If you've got the stones, then register your own name as a member. More adventurers means more options open to you, and less of a chance of dying down there. Think about it for a while, and make sure you register a variety of classes into your guild."

Now I register you lot.


As we head out, the cyclops talks to us again.
"That's everything. You're ready to get started. I hope you can shake things up in this town and clear out some of the deadwood. I'm looking forward to the day the Bay12 guild becomes known the world over!"


You hear that, guys? Make me rich. The whole town's open to us now, so I head for the pub for some quests. Quests means money, money means happy. Inside, the owner greets us.


"Welcome. Don't think I've seen your face in here before. You new in town? If you're going down in the Labyrinth, you should visit the Radha first. Every adventurer's got to go through Radha Hall before they're officially recognised. Sorry, hon, but my hands are tied. I can't give you any work until then. Once you're legit, come and see me again, all right? I'll be looking forward to it."

Ohmai. Anyway, she refuses to give us quests until we're done with the government. Guess where we're going now?

Radha Hall, and one specky guy. I prefered the pub.


"This is Radha Hall, home to Etria's governing body. I assume, newcomers, that you are en route to investigate the forest. However, we don't recognise just anyone who manages to throw together a guild. If you wish to become licensed adventurers, first complete the mission we give you."

Fine, fine. Then pub.
Mission name: Adventurer's initiation
Mission details: New adventureres must be tested by mapping the 1st floor of the Labyrinth. Meet the soldier on B1F for the details.

"Your mission is to create a map of the 1st floor of the Labyrtinth as an initiation. Those who cannot accomplish this elementary task are better off staying out of the forest. Explore the 1st floor and map everything you see there. This method will be useful later. Here is a small map to start you off; fill in the rest of the details as best you can. Now go to the forst and get the details from the soldier on the 1st floor."


Now we get a pretty map on the bottom screen. It's unfinished, as expected, but it can't be too hard to fill in. Of course, this is in the dungeon, so I hope one of you lot is literate enough to know how to use a pencil.

1st Stratum: Emerald Grove

So none of you can. Great. Well, I'll come along and draw the map, but I'm not fighting. Damn adventurers.


So here's the first floor of the Labyrinth. It's green and foresty, as the name implies. Let's go find the soldier and map this place already. Hey look, a wild soldier!


"You must be the new guys... The Radha told me you'd be along. Welcome to the forest."

Is he hiding a mobile under that armour? We came straight here. I'm compelled to ask him what he's doing here.

"My orders are to make sure no one--you for example--gets in the forest without permission. If you want in, start the way everyone does. Make a map of the floor we're on. As I'm sure they told you back at the Radha, everyone goes through this initation."

He drew on my damn map. Bastard. I'll get him for this.


"This area inside the red border shows where you've got to map. Finish that part and see me."

I was about to leave, when I was compelled to ask about the Labyrinth itself.

"We call this the Yggdrasil Labyrinth. It's a pretty strange place... The ecology here is completely different than the one in the world above, where we live. It goes down so deep that no-one has ever seen the lowest Stratum. If you plan on exploring down there, then make sure your sword is up at all times."

I leg it before I'm compelled to ask any more damn questions.


At the dead end over here, Wymar panics at the sight of a boot. A good look around reveals torn clothes and reddish stains on the ground. Alkhemia assures us the stains are nothing but spilled tomato sauce, so I assign Lon to pick up the boot. He gingerly does so, then pulls out an ivory coloured gem. We're in the money, boys. Oh wait, ambush.


3 of these critters jump us. Lon promptly dies. Fucking bards. At least Torne lit one on fire. Wymar's next to die. Torne is torn apart before Lynch and Alkhemia clean up. They level up and help me drag the others back to town. We head into the Apothecary. He seems unfazed that we just dragged 3 dead guys in, but this is a town of adventurers.


"Welcome to Etria. You stand in the town's apothecary, where we heal the wounded and fallen. We also offer medicines to take with you. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. If you're wounded in the forst, then come back here, and we'll do everything we can for you."

Yeah yeah yeah, cast raise dead already. We're 90 credits down for you guys, so let's go sell stuff.


Hot damn. I could get to like this town.

"Allo! Need items? Weapons? Equipment? I'm y'girl! Are you t'guild I hear 'bout wit' only new folk? Explorers like you are my best customers! I look forward t'doing business witcha!"

We make a profit on the journey of 41 credits, and only because of the gem. As she hands over payment for the bones we salvaged from the moles, her eyes light up and she carves them into a staff on the spot. A similar thing happens with the hides, which she turns into a ring. I think I'm in love. You poor buggers need some armour, so I'm gonna splash out here. You better be worth it. You each get a set of sandals made from leaves. She swears they'll help you move faster as well as defend you. I'd've argued, but she was gesturing wildly at the time and I got distracted. Whatever. You each owe me 80 credits. Wymar's complaining of exhaustion, so it's time to visit the Rooster Inn.


"Welcome to the Rooster Inn! We cater to adventurers who explore the forest. Please, make yourself at home."

Another 12 credits down the drain, leaving us with 629. I figure we're gonna spend a lot of money here and at the apothecary. Time to make more money.


Giant sodding butterflies. If you die to these, I'm going to leave you in here. Surprisingly, Lon was useful, saving Wymar's life by singing so badly the butterflies couldn't hurt him badly enough to kill him before Alkhemia got his shit together and healed him. Torne incinerated one, Lynch fried one and Wymar killed the last. No-one's dead yet. What a surprise.

Naturally, we get blindsided coming out of a dead end and Lon dies of surprise. Fucking bards. Time to leave again. We get jumped on the way out and Wymar dies before we can run away. I'm gonna have words with the shop lady about these sandals. After a late night visit to the apothecary. While the adventurers sleep, I make a few notes about the critters we've seen so far, as well as what we can hawk the crap we cut off them for.

A morning trip to the shop reveals that we again managed to make a profit. Of 8 credits. Come on, guys, I wanted to be rich in this lifetime.

Wandering around some more, I notice a shiny thing. Three butterflies don't stop us from getting to it, although they do let Wymar, Torne and Lon level up. It appears the shiny thing is a crystal that's blocking the path. Bastard.

Another dead end reveals some red fruit. Wymar nabbed one and ate it, and his papercut mysteriously healed itself. Another set of butterflies let Lynch and Alkhemia level up again, Alkhemia figuring out that healing everyone at the end of battle for no TP was a good idea.

A weird critter Wymar decided to call a Clawbug killed Lon in one shot. Fucking bards. Luckily, Torne was having none of its shit and lit it on fire. Cackling. I think the boy enjoys this too much.

Crazy shop lady turned a few small fangs into a dagger. I've long since stopped asking. Still, we're up to 692 credits, and we've made a pretty good job of mapping the area assigned to us.


Now I've been awake for 2 days straight, so it's time for me to sleep. Don't die overnight.

I started playing this recently and thought you guys might like to watch me kill you all off and go bankrupt found the best adventurers guild ever. I have seven classes unlocked so far, with at least two more to unlock at some stage in the future. Sign up for a character and I'll play through with you all. I'll try to use characters as evenly as possible but there's only 5 slots in the party. Feel free to pick starting skills, but an idea of how you want the character to work will let me level you easily without having to post every time you level up. You start with 3 skill points and gain one every level up.

Name:
Gender:
Class:
Specialisation (Optional):
Portrait (Optional):

Classes are as follows:

Landsknecht: Masters of sword and axe, Landsknechts can bear a wide range of weapons and armour in close combat. Balanced warriors for the front line.

Survivalist: Fleet-footed and wise in the ways of the forest, their bow skills make them desirable allies. Fast-acting fighters useful in either line.

Protector: Holy defenders of the weak. A Protector's sword and shield are invaluable tools when in the dungeon. Best used as front-line warriors.

Dark Hunter: Pinpoint lashes of their whip can weaken opponents. Use their skills wisely to turn the tide of battles. Their skills are best used in the front.

Medic: Unskilled in battle, their healing arts allow experienced warriors to survive difficult battles. Use their healing gifts from the back.

Alchemist: Those who study the control of nature. The power of fire, ice and lightning is at their command. Elementalists who prefer the back.

Troubadour: Lively dancers and singers who inspire the party. Their support is always welcome in combat. Supporters able to work on either line.

EDIT: One note: This is blind as fuck. No spoilers.

Posting to watch, but can I request you spoiler the screenshots? Makes scrolling down waaaaay easier.

14:57 - Sir Head Of Sweden: everyone ejoys a good loli after getting run over.
14:57 - Sir Head Of Sweden: or shot
14:57 - Sir Head Of Sweden: or exploded
14:58 - IceRaiser: myeeees
14:58 - Simmura McCrea: XD
14:58 - IceRaiser: that's why I keep spares in my basement