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Messages - Cogmeister

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31
DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: Your evil habits
« on: April 18, 2009, 10:56:18 pm »
The lye was derived from wood stolen from elven caravans (after they were murdered, ofcourse), while the tallow... the tallow came from kittens. All of it.

... most evil soap in existence

Thats some marketing ploy you got there. "Cogmeister Soap, it cleans with the power of unfathomable immorality! Now with 20% more sacrifical peasant blood!"

Then again, elves eat people and start wars all the time, if anything your scruplous industry standards are doing more good then evil. You gotta get soap made from Unicorn Tallow and your lye from the ashes found in the HFS.

That'd be really evil soap.

True, anything that harms elves is practically good. On the other hand, I still maintain that kitten tallow is more evil than using unicorns. Also safer. Plus, unicorn tallow and HFS ashes would both be too scarce to build a tower.

Oh, and another thing. I made a trap corridor. In other words, I lock the front doors when goblins come, and leave another door open, so the goblins will go through that. Said door is at the end of a long corridor, and every tile has a trap on it. Traps of psychological warfare.

See, some of them are weapon traps, with weapons made of goblin bone. Others are pressure plates, which open a hatch 8 Z-levels above (yes, 8). The hatch has a caged goblin on it, which falls down the shaft and hits the goblin below. I haven't tested it yet, so I'm not sure if it's the falling goblin or the hit goblin that gets splattered (maybe both), but hey, it's fun/horrible anyway.

Also something more straight-forward. Bridgeapaults at the top of a tower (not kitten soap this time, that was a previous fortress) that shoots kittens, puppies and occasional caged nobles at people.

32
DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: Your evil habits
« on: April 18, 2009, 01:27:04 pm »
I made a tower out of soap. It was only 3 Z-levels tall.

The lye was derived from wood stolen from elven caravans (after they were murdered, ofcourse), while the tallow... the tallow came from kittens. All of it.

Did it take ages to get the resources? Yes. Was it worth it? hell yes.

I think I created the most evil soap in existence, but knowing this forum, I'll be outdone soon enough. To make up for this, I pumped all three floors full of magma, then sealed it up, and placed a bauxite hatch on the top floor, plus a staircase up the side. Dwarves to be executed are placed in an iron cage and hauled to the hatch tile. Then I pull a lever, the hatch opens, and the dwarf falls into a lava pool. In the end, my prisoner melts in a tower made of kitten soap.

What can I say? I'm a nice guy.

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