Bay 12 Games Forum

But wait. What are the moral and ethical dispositions of the fluffy wamblers..?

They are of the utmost evil! They lull you with their cuteness only to feast upon your soul!

Alright. So i agree goblins are a force for good because i abuse, torture and encase my inhabitants in obsidian on a mad whim. It just means slaughtering goblins is just that bit more satisfying! Die you goody goody green skinned little gobshytes!

You can't spell slaughter without laughter!

The learning curve was one of the things that kept me from getting into DF sooner, but after finding a tut. and following along, I finally got a little knowledge of the game. It's one of my all-time favorites now.

And something always happens to keep it interesting/entertaining, like the one time when a cyclops "visted" my fortress, got into a fight with my wardogs, and then started throwing them, about 8 or 9 spaces away, into my outside walls, and splattering them to pieces, with body parts flying all over.

Or when a minataur came and started beating my dwarfs to death with a sheep wool sock.

Aw, DF...

Every fort has a story like this. Hell, just reading the whats going on in your fort topic provides great ideas and laughs!

Started a new fort after roughly a year without playing. I started in a flat, snow covered area. Nothing around that can kill my dwarfs. Just a few geese and a pack of capybaras. I had the 2 miners start digging out the stockpiles when I got the message that a capybara has killed a dog. I go to the surface level to find a freaking war zone! The capybaras have launched a full-fledge assault on my caravan! The first dog got his necked ripped open and bled to death. The second dog got dog-piled by 6 capybaras at once and had her head bit off. My 3rd dog had 2 legs ripped off and bled to death. Thats when my miners finished digging. They got to the surface and started slaying the hell out of the ugly bastards! In the end 7 capybaras were kill along with my 3 dogs. Some dwarfs had minor cuts and bruises, but I had only one dog left. A few months later she gave birth to 4 puppys. Also a elf caravan came by with a pair of wolfs, one male and one female. Because I was so happy to have wolfs I just stole what I wanted and let the elves leave with their lives. I'm such a nice guy. Good start to the fort I say!

A native platinum castle? By Armok's bloody beard, are those humans mad brilliant!?

Fixed it.

Whenever I get a breeding pair of whatever (cows usually, but sometimes horses), I always try to breed for the traits Gigantic, Fat, and Muscular.  This produces the highest amount of meat and fat when butchering animals. 

But I have never actually butchered a Gigantic, Muscular, Fat anything...

I always have too much meat/fat from just culling the animals with undesired traits.  My dwarves are breeding a super race of delicious, juicy animals that they have never, ever tasted.

I do that with my wardogs I use for battle. I kill the ones that are not muscular and big....They make good meals!

My dad calls it Dwarf fort. He used to play ADOM and NetHack. He now plays this game after seeing me making kitten biscuits. My mom on the other hand calls it the insanity generator because me and dad are always telling each other stories of what we did in our forts...And then laughing like crazy people.