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Messages - Haspen

Pages: 1 ... 791 792 [793] 794 795 ... 2254
11881
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: SPAMKINGDOM: Houlandin II of Luathbas!
« on: August 22, 2016, 02:27:02 pm »
You agree to meet with Queen Alexandra in battle!

By the next day, both your and Lametanian armies meet at the Fields of Aidach, area known for its large flocks of sheep. This time, the meadows are occupied by the hordes of infantry.

The scouts have determined that Queen Alexandra's army is comprised mostly of regular spearmen, backed by archers. However, the core formation is made of shortswordmen bearing also large square shields and with javelins tucked at their backs; their shields seem to bear the emblem of their nation, a golden eage perched atop a knotted ring. Furthermore, there is a unit of men using some sort of mechanical bow, and they have a yellow-striped black banner that does not look like Lametanian at all.

"This is a crossbow, my liege!" Points the Marshal. Then the signal horns come from the south, and its time to clash!

"Shall we go on offensive or shall we hold the hills, my liege!?"

A) "Attack, attack!"
B) "Hold our ground!"

11882
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: SPAMKINGDOM: Houlandin II of Luathbas!
« on: August 22, 2016, 02:12:39 pm »
You decide to once again take up your sword - well, mace, this time - and protect your lands from foreign invaders.



Congratulations! Houlandin II embarks on another military campaign!

Like before, all important nation events will be handled by the Queen Mother and the advisor.



Within three days, you are ready to embark from House of Lech, the largest fortress of Luathbas meet with the marching army of Queen Alexandra, who made quite big inroads into your Kingdom; she dispatched only small fortress to besiege border outposts, while the bulk of her army is moving northwards, pillaging and razing villages at they go! It's clear that she is carving out a path of destruction toward the heart of your Kingdom rather than trying to gain ground.

A) We shall draw them and then wait them out at House of Lech!
B) We gotta stop the advancing army with our own forces!

11883
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: SPAMKINGDOM: Houlandin II of Luathbas!
« on: August 22, 2016, 01:41:11 pm »
You send the Army to hunt down the bandits.

Quote
4

They are victorious with only small amount of casualties amongst your soldiers.

831 AD, Summer

The information about what have happened in the south caused panic in the court, before the situation was explained with a letter - which wasn't optimistic by the way.

"The LAMETANIANS have invaded our borders! We kept them in check for twenty years, now look them daring again! Have they not learned from the previous SLAUGHTERS of their men??" The advisor stood up after the Marshal sat down.

"Your Highness! The spies report that the army of Queen Alexandra is much larger than the raiding parties sent by the Kings of Lametania in the past. Furthermore, there seem to be some sort of allied regiments of unknown origin amongst her troops."

"MY LIEGE!" The Marshal booms. "Allies or not, they shall be defeated - send our glorious Army to deal with the threat!"

"That's a given, marshal, but the question is - will our beloved King go onto the campaign to defend our Kingdom from the southern aggressors?"

A) "Err, no, the Army can win on its own, I'm sure!"
B) "I won in Augas, I will win on our home soil. TO BATTLE!!"

11884
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: SPAMKINGDOM: Houlandin II of Luathbas!
« on: August 22, 2016, 12:53:06 pm »
You tell him everything about the white stag from the hunt, the prophecy, the 'cunning doe' that just happens to be Alexandra, Queen of Lametania, given her nickname, and-

Quote
3*hahahaha

"A white stag you say." The advisor then touches your forehead, as if you had a fever.

"Your Highness must be suffering from exhaustion. Truly, leading such a prosperous yet troubled nation is straining on one's soul and mind!"

He forces you to go on vacation for a while.

831 AD, Spring

Banditry is on the rise in the east! Enticed by the all the trade in Augas, numerous bandit groups have sprung like mushrooms after rain. Rumors say that they're led by 'Akimbo', a senile yet still badass war priest from Parsia.

The mayors of the cities in the east ask in a group letter if they might get help from the Crown in any way.

A) Send Army to deal with the bandits at once!
B) Cite some made-up excuses as a reason for being unable to help.

11885
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: SPAMKINGDOM: Houlandin II of Luathbas!
« on: August 22, 2016, 12:36:54 pm »
You reply with a letter in which you reject their offer and decline to support their faction.

830 AD, Autumn

A delegation from the Hurthlings arrives.

"Noble hew-mon sirreh!" They bow in respect. "We come to yoo to say that our good Chiiftain believes it is time for him to step down, now that your people and ours are living in harmony. He believes that our people won't find a better home and better Chiiftain than you!" They talk between themselves.

"He also expresses his gratitude for your support all these times and along with heads of large familiis, he have decided that there will be an eleet troop of Hurthling Slingers, ready to fight and die for yoo, hew-mon King!" Then they throw you and your courtiers a feast, full of fruit wine and dishes made from fresh produce.

830 AD, Winter

A report comes from the advisor; many a peasant enjoyed the numerous festivals sponsored by the Crown.

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5

The Marshal congratulates you on your shrewd buying of mercenaries, as many have joined the Army this year, enticed by Crown-sponsored payment.

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1to2

The trade advisor brings you a report; the trade with Gubta had increased the variety of goods, but there has been hardly any extra revenues from the trade.

830 AD, Midwinter

While having an afternoon goblet of wine, you receive news from the border; apparently, the 'northern' faction was ultimately destroyed. The new ruler of Lametania is the sister of previous King, a certain lady named Alexandra. She has a penchant for wearing a cloak made of deerskins, which gained her nickname 'Doe' amongst her subjects and soldiers.

You choke on and spit out your wine a little before servants clear your chin.

830 AD, End of the Year

As every other year, the advisor does not forget to bring you the Scrolls of Kingdom Status.

Happiness: 3
Population: 5
Economy: 3
Army: 7

He sets the scrolls aside and then places his hands behind his back. "Sire, I can't help but notice that you're paying much interest in having a strong army, that's a good thing, but I cannot help but point that both the mood of the populace and the Kingdom's finances are getting worse because of that. We should disband some army, at least this year, and perhaps invest in something... or just keep the money in the Treasury?"

A) Disband part of the army to recover money and supplies.
B) Disband some of the army, spend regained money on festivals and venues for the peasants.
C) Tell him about the talking stag and the cunning doe prophecy and the impending doom of the kingdom.
D) Dismiss him.

11886
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: SPAMKINGDOM: Houlandin II of Luathbas!
« on: August 22, 2016, 12:11:07 pm »
You order that the money shall be spent on both festivals and mercenaries. The trade advisor won't be happy but what he can do against King's decrees?

830 AD, Spring

Your wife gives birth to a boy! She names him Adagrast.

830 AD, Summer

Spies from the southern border report that the 'northern' faction in Lametanian Civil War, backing the 8 years old son of previous king, is losing against the forces of his aunt.

Few days later comes a letter from the 'advisor of the rightful King of Lametania' in which he promises return of your father's necklace and departure from the claim to Luathbas' Southern Territories if you were to provide troops and money for the 'northern' faction.

"We should think about it, my liege." Warns your advisor. "Either way, someone might get angry at our involvement, or because we did get involved..."

A) Let's help the 'northerners'! We won't get a better offer than this!
B) Decline, because it will only have consequences later, plus we ain't helping our hated enemies!

11887
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: SPAMKINGDOM: Houlandin II of Luathbas!
« on: August 22, 2016, 09:48:42 am »
You decide to hire adventurers.

Quote
6curses

You find a band that is willing to tackle such a supernatural entity. Week later, those asleep begin to wake up! At least those that didn't die yet.

The adventurers come back to your castle and are of course rewarded with heaps of money.

Your elven wife shakes her head. "They couldn't have killed him, his soul is too powerful. We might have refuge from his evil now, but one day, our children or grandchildren will have to deal with Witch King again!"

829 AD, Winter

You receive news that the gaudily-clad envoy of the Gubta is waiting at the gates, and you let him in.

Along with him, there are eighty servants, who bring you a coffer full of gold and gemstones! There are also fine silks for your wife and even golden cutlery and a jewelled short sword, purely ornamental of course. He also personally presents a small pouch of black grains.

"This is the true gold of the east, Western King: seeds of pepper." Says the translator slave, and then talks a bit with the envoy.

"My master, Amhal Kasha Chocapik Mangojoos, is happy to inform you, that our Emperor, blessed be his hallowed name, has agreed to the opening of Gubta markets to the raw goods and grain of your kingdom. In return, your traders will be allowed to purchase precious metals, spices and gemstones at a lowered prices." You thank the envoy for his work, and leave him with the trade advisors to eke out details.

829 AD, End of the Year

It's that time when the advisor brings the Scrolls of Kingdom Status to you.

Happiness: 2
Population: 5
Economy: 4
Army: 6

"I heard that you wished to speak with me, which is a good thing because I want to talk with you as well. The peasantry is unhappy and therefore I believe that we should spend money on festivals to pacify them."

"But I wanted more troops!" The advisor grimaces.

"But we need to keep people content, sire!" You stare at him, bemused.

A) "Fine! Spend some of the money on festivals."
B) "Then spend money on festivals and buy me some more mercenaries!"
C) "It's the army that is important! Get me more mercenaries!"
D) "Bah, I don't want to talk about this anymore."

11888
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: SPAMKINGDOM: Houlandin II of Luathbas!
« on: August 22, 2016, 08:51:20 am »
You therefore wait for a wizard to pass through your Kingdom.

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3

Apparently one was seen somewhere in the east, but nobody could give actual details.

829 AD, Summer

"The latest reports put the dead at a thousand and afflicted being six thousand." The advisor then opens another scroll.

"However, in the other parts of the Kingdom, there has been also unrest because of the Crown's unwillingness to do something about it." The Marshal slams the table.

"MY LIEGE! The Army shall go and EVISCERATE that Witch King! JUST GIVE YOUR WORD!!, sire."

"We need to find a wizard." Your wife says, before advisor chimes in with "Your majesty, if our kingdom is to prosper, it needs more... adventurers!"

A) FOR ARMY.
B) Find the wizard!
C) Find the adventurers!

11889
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: SPAMKINGDOM: Houlandin II of Luathbas!
« on: August 22, 2016, 07:37:51 am »
You thank her for her input and announce that another search for a Wizard is to be commenced!

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3

One was spotted in the south, but disappeared before your envoys could talk to him.

829 AD, Late Spring

The plague continues to spread in the northwest. Already there is report of over 200 who 'died of sleep' and five times that number of sleepy and apathetic people.

"Clearly we need to take measures right now than wait for a wizard, sire!" Say the councillors.

"No! No one but a Wizard can cure this vile curse, my liege!" Says your dearest elven wife.

A) Wizard!
B) Adventurers!
C) Army!!

11890
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: SPAMKINGDOM: Houlandin II of Luathbas!
« on: August 22, 2016, 05:36:07 am »
You summon your wife to the council room, and explain the plague and its symptoms. She sighs.

"Alas, my liege, I know well of these symptoms! It is not an illness, but a curse brought on by the vile Witch King!" The councilmembers murmur in unease.

"Are there larger numbers of spiders, wolves and wasps in the northwest as well?" The nobleman from that region, prompted by your wife, thinks for a moment, before shaking his head. That makes your wife wonder.

"Usually if the Witch King wishes to bring torment and destruction upon domains of hapless people, he also employs venomous giant spiders, packs of man-eating wolves and swarms of deadly wasps before or during the curse of sleep. Nonetheless, it is his doing, I am sure of it! He might have his new hideout in the swamps of northwest. I beseech you, my dear King and husband, find a powerful Wizard because only such an entity can match the power of Witch King!"

A) Let's do as our wifey asks and search for a Wizard.
B) Let's try something else first; namely, send the Army to scour the forests and swamps and battle this 'Witch King'!
C) How about we hire some 30+ level adventurers instead? They can surely match him in power as well!

11891
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: SPAMKINGDOM: Houlandin II of Luathbas!
« on: August 22, 2016, 05:13:26 am »
You explain that you do not want to make allies at the cost of making new enemies, but exchange of goods would be welcome. The two discuss this, the envoy sighs, and instructs his translator.

"My master is sad to hear that you do not wish to embrace the loving embrace of Gubta Empire, as a simple trade agreement might not appease the Emperor, blessed be his hallowed name, but my master shall convey your message back to our homeland." Another pause for them to talk.

"My master also says that because the route to your Kingdom is known, he might return with reply from our Emperor, blessed be his hallowed name, in a year or two." The two bow and depart.

828 AD, End of the Year

The advisor arrives with his scrolls, like always.

Happiness: 3
Population: 5
Economy: 4
Army: 6

829 AD, Spring

The spies from the south report that one of the factions in Lametanian Civil War has been bled dry and destroyed after series of military defeats. The country is now split north-south in terms of territories between the remaining two factions.

829 AD, Mid-Spring

A strange plague seems to be afflicting the peoples in the north-west of your Kingdom! Apparently it causes irresistible desire to sleep and be apathetic, to the point that some less-willed fall asleep and never wake up, till their bodies give up from thirst and starvation!

There is something very strange, very malicious, and quite possibly magical at works...

A) Hire a band of level 20+ adventurers to find out and deal with the cause of this plague!
B) Send forth agents to find a wizard that can help cure this plague!
C) Order the royal alchemists, priests and healers to find a cure for this strange affliction.
D) Ask your dear elven wife about this, as she came from north-west as well.

11892
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: SPAMKINGDOM: Houlandin II of Luathbas!
« on: August 22, 2016, 04:36:48 am »
You agree that such a blunt and unsubtle name like 'Murder Time' works best for equally blunt and unsubtle weapon that is a stone mace.

828 AD, Autumn

Yearly revenues from Augas arrive, also you claim the province as actual part of Luathbas.

//From now on, Augas revenues won't provide a notification and Economy rating will gain 1 point at end of each year.

Also, the governor writes that he established that the strange envoy comes from the Gubta Empire, which is somewhere on the very eastern side of Parsia; the envoy apparently spent four years navigating about the lands in search for 'mysterious enemies of Parsia from the west'. The governor will be sending the envoy your way with translator and bodyguards.

828 AD, Mid-Autumn

The gaudily-clad brown-skinned envoy does arrive at your court. He wears a funny round hat adorned with jewels, which actually looks like cloth wrapped around his head. He has a simple white tunic, but also wears an elaborate robe dyed with lavender, purple and red. He wears a simple silver necklace, yet his fingers are adorned with numerous rings made of gold and gemstones.

"My master, Amhal Kasha Chocapik Mangojoos, envoy of the Emperor of Gubta, wishes to bless you with the fortune and good health." The shorter man, clad in commoners' clothes, speaks for him.

"The Emperor, blessed be his hallowed name, have heard of your exploits against our mortal enemies, the Parsians, and my master therefore is here to inquire if you would be interested in striking an alliance against our common foe." The two discuss something before the translator continues.

"In the name of Emperor, blessed be his hallowed name, the envoy is ready to offer you the hand of the Emperor's daughter, Sheva, in marriage, or in marriage of Lady Sheva and one of your sons, if you have any. Or there might be talks of a profitable trade agreement, as my master have seen the bounty of this land that is grain and lumber and ores of metals, which would find buyers at Gubtan markets amongst our jewellery, slaves and spices."

A) Let's not make enemies of our eastern neighbours and not deal with peoples from afar when there's trouble brewing at our very borders in the future. Decline the offer.
B) It would be an error to make enemies of Parsians right now, but maybe trade agreement is not a bad thing. Agree to exchange of goods and gifts, but nothing more.
C) An alliance could keep Parsians in check and provide Luathbas with many opportunities to enrich itself, and more. Full-fledged alliance it is!

11893
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: SPAMKINGDOM: Houlandin II of Luathbas!
« on: August 22, 2016, 02:43:15 am »
You terefore decide to visit the King personally and teach him stuff.

Quote
6*

Once you get them, you tell him of the laws, of money, how to earn it as your warriors in your employ-

"No! King work not! King takes money! Only King order Fomorians! I am King!" He raises his new, smaller club and charges at you!

Quote
5*

However, anticipating violence, you sidestep and dodge the wild swings. At one moment, the frenzied Fomorian king trips over a tree root and falls onto the ground, and you use that opportunity to drive your sword through his neck. He twitches, gurgles and dies.

The Fomorians nearby look at you, and you wonder if maaaaybe you just signed your death warrant... but wait! They begin to chant and laugh.

Then they surround you and one of their tatooed males rubs some blue paint on your face.

Congratulations, you are now King of Fomorians! One way or another.

As you return to the palace, the guards and your councilors are aghast at the sight of the formidable Fomorians walking behind you in two orderly lines.

828 AD, Summer

The Court artificiers bring good news! With a help of some priests, they have determined that only the obsidian head of the mace was enchanted - with a spell that can make even smallest of wounds become serious - and therefore it was possible to scale down the size of the mace into something that could be wielded by an average human.

This makes it basically a new artifact, and therefore they ask you to give it a name. It appears that some artificiers are also wordsmiths...

A) The Skullcrusher
B) Black Death
C) Destruction of Heavens
D) Hand of Conquest
E) The Punisher
F) Instrument of Obliteration
G) Murder Time

11894
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: SPAMKINGDOM: Houlandin II of Luathbas!
« on: August 22, 2016, 01:49:35 am »
BABBABBBBBBABB

Option B it is (I will laugh if it ends with same scenario as in 811 AD)

Actual update when I'm done with breakfast v;

11895
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: SPAMKINGDOM: Houlandin II of Luathbas!
« on: August 21, 2016, 03:30:15 pm »
You send another envoy.

Quote
6curses, it finally happened

The envoy returns. The Fomorian King wants loot because 'loot makes King!', and refuses to stop.

"THOUGHT SO! Naught but EXTERMINATION!! remains a viable option, my liege!" The advisor thinks for a moment, and then proposes something completely opposite to Marshal's words:

"Mayhaps we should hire him and his band as, well, warriors on our payroll?" The Marshal thumps his chest hearing Advisor's words.

"NAY, sire! None of your saner subjects would agree to the band of savages being put on equal standing with your royal and loyal soldiers! And no noble-born envoy would even propose such a thing to them!"

A) "Then there is only one option left! Rid our Kingdom of their presence, good Marshal!"
B) "Then if no one is brave enough to visit them, I shall go and offer work the Fomorians and their King myself!!"

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