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Messages - Shade-o

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1321
Other Games / Re: Total War Games.
« on: October 25, 2010, 01:36:54 am »
My bestest ever general of Europa Barbarorum. Playing as the Karthadastim, I first focused on conquering North-West Africa, leaving the Ptolemaioi alone. Of course, simply through the passage of time it came to be that the Romani, Lusotannan and Ptolemaioi decided to attack first. Since they were also involved in conquering other enemies, I got off rather lightly.

The cities of Gader and Mastia (Iberia, Lusotannan), Lepki (North Africa, Ptolemaioi) and Messana (Sicily, Romani) became hotbeds of conflict, but I was able to send token forces to defend them while setting my sights on the true prize: The Casse (No, I don't know why I did that either).

So, with great fanfare the great invasion fleet set off. Huge warships carried their precious cargo, watchful for the pirates of the coast. Numidian and Sardinian archers, Balaeric slingers, Libyan heavy infantry and cavalry, and a selection of young and old generals. It was the grandest army ever seen.

Due to this great expenditure, the defence of the rest of the realm suffered. Each invasion force had to be countered with whatever units could be gathered up, resulting in hard-fought bloodbaths at bridges and walls. Lepki in particular suffered the most. The Ptolemaioi were rapidly absorbing the old Seleukid empire, making them stronger still. A certain young noble sent to Lepki for his studies was in charge of its defence. The battles were many and hard fought, but the city never fell. The vast expanse of Africa was guarded by this citadel.

On finally reaching the Isles of the north, the invading Africans stormed the population centres. What would be Ireland fell immediately, but the indignant natives rallied and soon the army hit a roadblock. Having perfected its arts against the Romani and Ptolemaioi, they were unprepared for the masses of barbarians who fought with animal savagery. The Balaeric slings were near useless against unarmoured, agile foes, and the heavy infantry could at best hack and slash their way to victory, trading their lives at a high rate. The archers were most effective, but were too few in number to greatly affect the horde. Although they still had momentum and significant force, unless something changed this grand army would be trapped and overwhelmed on these islands.

And so, the cities of North Africa sent up a great recruitment of forces, of infantry and a great many archers. They arrived just in time to reinforce the shattered remnants, who were falling back to their initial conquests. The Numidian and Sardinian archers, assisted by some local conscripts, were able to send up such a rain of arrows that the Casse were made weak even before reaching the reinvigorated infantry lines. Over time, the great hordes were diminished, and the momentum shifted against them. The Casse were destroyed, and the islands of the North became a quiet, if backward colony of Karthadastim.

At this point, the Ptolemaioi were a greater threat than ever. Having nearly finished gutting the Seleukid, more and more forces were arrayed against Lepki. Fortunately, the victorious Casse-conquerors returned and reinforced, ready to taste blood again. And who would lead this veteran mass of Karthadastim might? Abdmelqart from Lepki, now a grizzled general who had fought his whole life.

Riding at the head of the army, he swept the phalanxes aside. The march across the long, dry coast was marked by many battles as the full might of the enemy turned against him. It only got harder still. On reaching Egypt, a vast battlefront opened up, with armies marching from both Palestine and beyond, and the Upper Nile. Realising that the assault had to be maintained, he split off a small part of his army to delay, harass and conquer the Upper Nile. The main force continued with him, through Alexandria and across the Nile, plowing through soldiers raised from across Asia. Around this time the old Shophet died, and with his ceaseless devotion, grand conquests and adoration by the people he was picked without dissent.

As he reached Palestine, the war took a turn for the worse. The enemy waited in every direction, and his forces stretched thinner with every mile taken. More and more Ptolemaioi conscripts from the heart of Persia arrived, and there was no end in sight. Worse still, the local Jewish population had taken up arms, and began protecting the vulnerable phalanxes with skirmishers. With these new tactics, each battle became a magnitude tougher.

Striking a bold plan, he organised for forces in Rhodos, Kypros and Krete (captured long ago during some inspired raids) to attack along the coast of Asia Minor. The hastily raised Greeks did as demanded, and captured numerous cities along the coast, even striking inland. Meanwhile, Abdmelqart personally led his own forces on a leapfrogging attack that captured Sidon, trapping many enemies between his forces. The simultaneous attacks staggered the Ptolemaioi, who were unable to respond all over their empire. Using this respite, Abdmelqart conquered a great swath of land, taking him up to Antiocheia.

At this point, there was truly a crossroads. To the East lay Asia Minor, cut off from the heart of the empire but still a power to behold. The coastal strongholds were being overwhelmed, and soon they would strike. To the West lay the vast lands conquered from the Seleukid, stretching all the way to India. Even now they struck at his vulnerable flanks.

He chose East. Taking with him the majority of the army, he disappeared into the wild mountains that held the enemy. To protect his old conquests he assigned a youth, seemingly sent to the front in order to teach him a lesson. With the order to conquer, burn and delay, he was not to destroy the enemy, but halt them long enough for Asia Minor to be pacified.

And so it came to be that Abdmelqart conquered and slew his way across the land, fighting an enemy more and more desperate. The islands of Rhodos, Kypros and Krete lent valuable distraction and reinforcement, and allowed him to continue the attack where it would normally falter. Meanwhile, the forces he had arrayed in Asia worked perfectly. Striking boldly, taking cities and then burning them, stinging the enemy wherever possible, the Tigris and Euphrates ran red with blood.

Finally, Abdmelqart conquered the last city in the land. It had been tough. The nearby Makedons had taken offence to him removing their longtime neighbours, and he had had to remove them as well. In Ankyra, he wintered with his troops, celebrating his victory. And then, as preparations were made to move out to Babylon and strike the deathblow, he perished of old age.

This man was a legend. He defended Lepki against overwhelming forces while the army was off conquering Britain. He personally conquered everything on the way from Africa to Byzantium. He led amphibious assaults and recaptured Phoenecia. He single-handedly crippled the Ptolemaioi, who were at their worst Yellow Death level at controlling half the map. He was the best thing since Alexander. And he died partying.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

1322
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: OMEGA FLEET: take the captains chair.
« on: October 24, 2010, 06:59:21 pm »
Since a combustion engine is incredibly outdated, do sensors even pick it up any more?

1323
General Discussion / Re: [:3] Things that made you HAPPY today thread.
« on: October 24, 2010, 05:48:03 am »
My avatar is a mental and emotional hazard. It feels good to know that I've impacted the world in some way.

1324
7/10, because the high contrast makes it hard to understand and the height causes loading issues.

1325
9/10, Zeratul makes everything cool.

1326
DF Suggestions / Re: Sieges
« on: October 23, 2010, 06:48:06 pm »
Conversely, how about being able to hire mercenaries for your fortress defence? They would come with their own equipment and training, and can only act as soldiers in their squads. You can't change their equipment or organisation, but otherwise they can be controlled as normal military. Though it would be a bit superfluous for a thriving city, it might be worth it for a struggling fort that is vulnerable to forgotten beasts, demons or insanity.

As for payment? Perhaps this would give a use for coins. The Mercenary Captain arrives and heads for the Trade Depot, where you can negotiate as if with a caravan. Instead of items, they list squads of mercenaries. You give them the coin, they leave and some time later the company sends whichever mercenaries you ordered.

1327
I love Shepard!

9/10

1328
6/10

I insist on being rated.

1329
I didn't even get rated. Sadface.

1330
I don't quite get it. The pixels, they do not tell me much beyond a penguin(?) and orange lenses.

5/10

1331
Only because it's not yet election time. Give it a year, and you won't be able to go a moment without hearing that the stimulus plan caused the recession, the healthcare murdered thousands of foetuses, the terrorists are going to launch nuclear missiles from Iraq, he personally sabotaged the Gulf oil rig, has been driving a truck full of Mexicans around looking for jobs to steal, is working with China, Russia, Cuba, N Korea, Iran, and Kenya to destroy Freedom, and he won the first election by using Wish, the scroll of which he found in a sunken temple off the coast of Angola, obtained by bargaining with a dark and eldritch force that dwelt within.

Just wait and see.



As for the unofficial Republican chant, well, that's too crazy to even type withoderka dur.

1332
Well, there isn't any point in going to the moon unless it's a colonisation effort. The first landing was pretty much a way to one-up the Soviets, and after they took samples and played golf there isn't much else that can't be done in regular orbit. I can see China or India or some other emerging power landing there, but only to plant their flag and show everyone else that they're to be taken seriously.

1333
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: OMEGA FLEET: take the captains chair.
« on: October 23, 2010, 01:28:41 am »
Mentally review the events that led up to this horrible state of life. Then sob in the corner until you land at Desca.

1334
DF Suggestions / Re: Down with ramp channeling
« on: October 23, 2010, 12:12:37 am »
I'm curious as to why people prefer the new channelling on the basis of it making a ramped hole.

That's exactly what the ramp designation did and still does.

The only change is the removal of the ability to make clean holes. Now, I may be a simple forumgoer, but when you have two useful, distinct features and one of them is removed for no reason, that's commonly known as a Bad Thing.

1335
DF Suggestions / Re: Buoyance
« on: October 22, 2010, 11:26:53 pm »
This would require a somewhat accurate portrayal of weight distribution in terrain, which would also mean the end of a whole mountain being supported by a wooden log.

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