Bay 12 Games Forum

I always thought the game freak symbol was a fish.

Heh... I just noticed that when you pointed it out. Perhaps that's a strong christian overtone.

Well, I also did a LP of this over on the Wrestlecrap boards and here is probably the best thing that occurred from mine.




Make me proud mate.

1. Female
2. Steve
3. Torchic
4. McNugget

Also, Saphira is hawt. That's a big redeeming factor, probably the only one in the movie.

None of the screenshots work in any update. Only the portraits work.

Hmmmm. Odd. They're showing up fine on my end. I'll try cleaning up the image links and redo them again.

I sometimes have had a problem with Photobucket so I wouldn't be surprised if it isn't show up for some people.

Chapter Two: We are Team Unstable or How I learned to stop worrying and love the ticking timebombs around me



While at Feldposts Tavern, I ran into a... bizarre gnome. As in, more bizarre than my current bash brothers.



: You're a little small for a world conqueror. How will you do this?

: Do you not possess ears? It is Destiny, just as Tiax said! Cyric himself will lift Tiax on-high, hurtling him to his rightful place in the end. You are like ants before Tiax but slightly larger than the norm if you assist.

: So you'll help me in whatever it is that I have to do.... so that I... help you dominate the planet?  Uh yeah, just hop into the back of the group and tell me when you're lifted on-high.

: 'Twas as Cyric fated it. Let us make haste so that Tiax may then rule.


So long story short, I'm apparently helping an insane gnome conquer the world after all of this is through.


NEW CHARACTER

Yeah, I think that I've kinda enlisted to join team evil. My only choice is to ditch the two stooges in Nashkel and find someone else to help.



: Greetings travellers, you would not happen to be mercenaries by any chance?

: Yes.

: Tiax will rule! He would not hire himself out for money like a common thug.

: When do you actually plan on ruling?

: Next month when the weather clears up. As Cyric commands it to be so.

: You're a bloody lunatic, do you know that?

: I think he's just charming. Such delusions of grandeur in a tiny package.

: uh... of course Xzar.

: I take it you are? Well, my name is Garrick and I'm representing the beautiful Silke Rosena, Thespian Extraordinaire. She is the greatest actress and musician along the coast and even performed at the Duchal palace last month. Unfortunately, she has run afoul of Feldepost of late. She did not perform at his inn and-

: We need to remove Feldepost from the picture. And anyone privy to this information.

: What? Not at all. All she asks for is some protection from some of his hired thugs.

: Killing is a form of protecting.


:  She just requires some mercenaries to protect her until she heads to Baldur's Gate.

: Hey, that's the name of this game.

: What?

: What?

: Well, that's sounds fine.

: Good.

: What the hell is a Thespian?



So here we were

: Greetings mercenaries I am Silke, Thespian Extraordinaire. I trust little Garrick has laid out the terms of your employment?

: What is a Thespian anyway?

: It's an actor anklebiter.

: I promised them 300 gold as per your request.

: Fabulous. All you must do is protect me from Feldeposts thugs when they arrive. However, you must not speak with them as one is a powerful mage who can sway your mind with his words.



: Here they are now. Strike when I tell you without any mercy and in the name of Silke, Thespian Extraordinaire.

Merchant : Greetings Silke. We're here as you asked and have-

: Do not try to threaten me! I have hired powerful mercenaries to aid me.

Merchant : But we have bought the gems just as you asked.

: SHUT UP! DO NOT LISTEN TO THEM. STRIKE NOW AND KILL THEM ALL.

: Yeah, I'm gonna say we aren't.

: We're not?

: Eh, kinda pointless to make an enemy of a fairly rich man. We haven't gotten paid yet either.

: Tiax does not wish to sully the hands that will rule the world with the blood of fools.

: Oh thank god. These guys are definitely innocent.

: THEN YOU WILL DIE ALSO!

: Yeah, I think not.



*Rule one of scripted fights. Be prepared to act before they do. If you don't lay a beatdown quickly then she'll turn invisible and then can throw off a couple of lightning bolts that eviscerate you at such a low level.

Also, putting them to sleep while you beat them to death is rather funny. Just like me in Adventure Mode*



An unidentified staff, a potion and 400 gold. I'd say this worked out well.

: How is this different to me killing those two drunks?

: Because I've not been banned for eternity from a tavern. I've not drunk anything in the past couple of days and where the constant buzz is has been replaced with a seething rage.

: Also, she was evil.

: That too.



Afterwards, Garrick attempted to hook up with the group. While Tiax wanted to recruit a bard to speak the legends of Tiax, everyone else were firmly against his joining.
SO AWAY! We have Caravan Bandits to kill!



Ah....

: The death... the destruction... What is this, Boatmurdered?

: What?

: What?

: That was quite the funny. Next caravan we find, I get to make the joke.

: goddammit Xzar.




Sweet Crapping Armok, we have Dread Wolves. At level one, you do not want to encounter them. They hit hard and have a decent amount of health.




: Oi ya bastards! That's my meal ticket!

Bandit Leader: I was wondering when the dwarf would get here. I guess you get to die as well.

: My axe says otherwise!



: Ah, I love sleep spells. It makes things so much quieter and less messy.

*Aside*

: When are we cutting them loose?

: Not soon enough.

*Aside end*

: So are we heading south now?

: *Sigh* Fine.



A pair of Ogrillions attacked us as we left Beregost. Ogrillions are the horrifying result of when Orcs and Ogres bump uglies. Naturally we removed such freaks of nature with gusto.



Continuing along the way, we were accosted by an armed mercenary of the Flaming Fist. I was tempted to hand over Monatron when he spoke to us.

Guard: You there- Halt! You are under arrest on suspicion of banditry and highway robbery. We know you're part of the band that has been terrorizing the coast.

: Your future ruler shall not be accused unjustly of banditry! Cyric will be very cross!

: You're not helping Tiax.

: We butchered a pack of bandits earlier.

: NOT HELPING

Guard : Clearly a rival band that you murdered. Why should I believe anything that you say?

: Because of my kind smile and warm demeanour?

Guard : Talking is getting you nowhere.

: Arrest us then.

Guard: HA! Nobody is going to question me having to kill a pack of bandits!
 
: Heh. The law are the people asking for it the most.

And so we killed him. Rather easily too although this cannot be helping my cause of being a decent person.

*And now the greatest scene ever in a RPG!*





Moving on then.



Gentlemen, We have arrived. Apparently Nashkel has a Kobold problem. Once thing to remember though is that Urist is a country whose only export is pain.

and Dwarven Ale, Beer and Corpses studded with even more pain.

*And I find myself incompetent thanks to portraits not being the same size. Ah well, what are you going to do?*

CHAPTER ONE: SOUTHBOUND





*Slight balls up. This was just a minor screw up on my behalf. I'm using Imoens BG II portrait and accidentally chucked this in the custom portraits folder under her name. All fixed though*

: How in the? How the hell did you know? Neither of us could have expected that!

: I... accidentally... read a letter on his desk the other day.  Can't remember exactly what it said, but he might still have... it might be on his... his body.  Anyway, I'm not gonna let you wander around out here all alone.  Never let a friend down, no sir!  Stick with you until you say otherwise, I will!

: Can't say no, can I?

: No chance at all.

NEW CHARACTER


I couldn't say no after she snuck out. She won't be able to return home easily if I turned her away and I'm not going to turn away my oldest friend.



: Soooooooo... What should we do now?

: I'm going to go back to check on Gorions body. He should have something that could point me in the right direction.



A scroll? Bah, no use as any true dwarf can't read.



: Yeah... He died saving me from something.

: Don'tcha even know what attacked you? Whoever -or whatever- it was certainly vicious.

: Ogres, some chick with a mace and a huge bastard in spiky Armour. I didn't stick around to chat, what with them trying to get me and all.

: So, he was after you? I don't like this Urist. Who'd be out to kill you?

: Dunno. All I know is that I'll make him pay for killing Gorion.

As we turned to walk away, Imoen seemed hesitant.

: We should bury him. It's not right to leave him out like this.

: Shame we can't give him a grand tomb like those Dwarven Mountain Halls that I've seen drawings of.

It seemed fitting to say.He was my father even if it wasn't by blood. We quickly buried him and moved on, his murderer could be anywhere.



Gibberlings. Truly the Elves of the Sword Coast. Wait... There are Elves already... They're the pansies that any adventurer exterminates in large numbers.

As we made our way back to the road, we ran into an obese man. He physically couldn't have squeezed into that suit of armour from last night so I was prepared to trust him.



: Heya, I'm Imoen and this is my friend Urist. We just left Candlekeep and are starting out on a grand adventure. Slaying the mage and... Urist, please stop staring at me.

: Quiet. You said something about two people out in the woods? I'm supposed to meet two friends at the Friendly Arm Inn

Kolssed: Doubtful. They didn't seem fond of each other, let alone anyone else. They also weren't at the inn so there's that also.

: Thanks for your help. Could you provide anything else?

Kolssed: 'fraid not. I can only give you this advice. Surround yourself with a band of like-minded companions, lest you make enemies that are at your side. Good luck.

: Ya hear him? Like minded companions. You'll do alright even though your head is as thick as the walls of Candlekeep.

: Sh- Thanks mate.

I knew that Imoen was trying to get a rise out of me. She knew exactly what buttons she could press and for how long.



We found the two that Kolssed had spoken of. They certainly stood out; one tall lanky man that was very twitchy and deranged looking while the other was a heavily armed halfling with a sadistic look in his eyes.



: How do you know about that?

: And ye look scuffled too. A fine pair of troubles all your own.

: Indeed. I'd be more than willing to provide you with some healing potions.

: I'd be grateful for any assistance.

: Nothing to fear from these simple potions, and I'll not even hold you in debt, though your conscience knows otherwise.

:  Just like all good people.

: Quite. In exchange for our gift, perhaps you could provide us a service. We are traveling to Nashkel to make contact with the mayor, one Berrun Ghastkill. A... mutual acquaintance is concerned with rumours about an iron shortage.

: Yer conscience be yer guide.

: I have no choice, do I?

: You have a choice. You may just regret it.

: Fine then.

: Goody goody goody. A wise choice. Let us move with all haste. We go SOUTH!!!

NEW CHARACTER


No matter how decent their mission is, I trust them to stab me in the back at sometime or another. The two were clearly dangerous and worth keeping an eye on.



: Where to Urist?

: South

: Don't we get any choice in the matter?

: I advise you go south. Monty gets very cranky.

: By the gods MAGE. Must ye make me look the fool?



As we made our way along Lions Way, we encountered a somewhat odd old man. He approached me and tried to strike up a conversation. He was clearly insane so I just passed him by although Imoen thought he looked familiar.



Entering Beregost, I approached a local and quickly found the location of multiple taverns in town. I was going to do some drinking until I couldn't feel feelings anymore.




I was liberated of some money by this halfling chap. He dashed out the door before I could react. Luckily it was only small change but we decided to move elsewhere.



This is more like it. Much better than Winthrops Inn.



: We're not hurting anyone by being here.

: We are now!



Within seconds Monatron had killed both men. I was seriously tossing up ditching them and heading to the Friendly Arm Inn.

: SWEET MERCIFUL ARMOK IN HEAVEN! WHAT IN THE NINE HELLS ARE YOU DOING?

: The bastards were asking for it!



This isn't a tavern... What is this place?



: The hell kind of shop is this?

: This is less of a shop and more of a... of a job agency.  And you look like you wish for some coin.

: Well, yes but-

: I make a living hiring out caravan guards but it's a bit of a pain in my ass with the bandits attacking. A couple of days ago, a caravan was attacked and one passenger was kidnapped. I generally don't give a damn about brats but this one in particular is the son of a man that essentially runs things around here.

: So you're saying-

: If you take the offer, I'll pay you and offer my services. I can have someone watch the store for me. Do you accept?

: Fine. I could use the help.

NEW CHARACTER


I felt like I could trust Kagain. He was open and honest about what he does, even if it is somewhat questionably moral. I didn't know how long I'd be able to pacify the other two by straying from their demand but I'd cross that bridge when I reached it.


So what shall we do?

a) Keep the evil duo?

or

b) Dump them and pick up Khalid and Jaheria?