Bay 12 Games Forum

Only one list of things to do? Wow, must be my lucky day!

Also from the looks of the poll I'm going to have to do a tiebreaker vote unless someone has withheld their vote up until now.
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You decide to make some kind of primitive 'USB' device to allow you to program the robots with the laptops, or control them or something. You find it's always best to keep your options open. You consider making some form of shock absorbing shell but aren't sure whether you'd want the laptops padded or the robots. At any rate it only takes some basic modifications to the robots to make them USB compatible.

You then take Overpowered-Bot Mk1 and program a few scripts for it (15+1) you quickly manage to get it to follow a basic routine and even set up an obstacle course for it to overcome. Of course, you'd need to give it some form of sensors to be able to properly make it into a automatic kill-bot.

You then decide that McCreepfest is kind of creeping you out. So like any sane and rational individual you decide to do horrible things to its body while it's still awake. (7+1) You manage to remove all the major senses and things but 'unfortunately' you do so in a manner that causes McCreepfest constant pain. You find this quite funny so shop its legs and arms of to. Now it's just a zombie torso with a eyeless, earless head.

At any rate you decide to set up a laptop to make the same sounds as the zombie thinks. That way you'll be able to use it as a radio of creepiness. (19+2) You manage to quickly and easily do sound so you add sight and even create a basic zombie-mind monitoring program on the computer. It's pretty awesome. Basically you've managed to download a zombies mind onto a laptop. Along with the servant implants upgraded communication features. And no lag. At any rate you off McCreepfests pain receptors in its brain since, well. You don't want it going insane on you and somehow turning your bots against you, now, do you?

At any rate you fiddle around with some small basic television screens in its eyes McCreepfests zombie mind can still be monitored even if you use the laptop for something else. (You built a basic computer to hold the Zombie-Brain-Watch Mk1 program). (7+1) However you don't get far and end up just using the screen you built on the second basic computer.

You then set about actually programming a body for McCreepfest to virtually inhabit with electrodes hooked up to its spine so that it can control the virtual body with minimal problems. (15+1) You quickly manage to make a 'Virtual Zombie' program. It's pretty cool but isn't as advanced as your mind monitoring system. You guess it could be used quite well to test out new zombie designs. Of course you secretly hope it suddenly breaks down every time you actually try to test a new design. Cutting up minions is so much funner.

You also decide to give McCreepfest the ability to look at what the computer is doing as you fiddle about with it. (2+1) Or at least try to, you nearly drive it insane after trying to get it to see everything the computers doing at once. You swear under your breath as you disable the prototype program. You were hoping to use it as a kind of sentient anti-virus scanner. That and to tell when the Librarian was looking up rude pictures of naked Anteaters on the internet (when you got it). You're not sure what you'd do about it but you'd feel better knowing. Of course she could also be looking up ways to betray you... But you suspect she wouldn't do that for fear of losing her main hobby: laughing at your inventions and generally being a killjoy.

You then try to build a case for the device. (7+1) It doesn't work that well and you end up spending 142MP building a casing big enough to hold all the various parts and devices.

You also set up a basic automatic care/matinance device for your new zombie-computer-thing. (16+1) It works out quite well. And you tell your zombies to keep their comrade alive with food E.T.C.

You then scrawl 'Zombieputer' on the side of the casing. The Librarian laughs at the amount of effort going into building what is, according to her a 'fancy computer'. The thugs stare blankly at it until you casually mention that it contains the still-living body of one of your zombies. They look pretty scared then.

You then decide to try again with the foam beds (3+1) still, no such luck. At any rate you decide to try and make water beds with the foam instead (15+1) and get some Quite Good Water Beds! You make one for yourself and one for the Librarian after she promises not to puncture the bed with her spines. When you mentioned spines she went into one of her 'Anteaters Don't Even Have That!' rants where she points out a series of obvious lies like her 'obvious' humanity. You tell her to stop being such an Armadillo. She quietened down and promised to take her spines off when on the bed in the end however.

You then get one of the thugs to test the zombies abilities to stand still for long hours at a time while faced with annoying tourists. After four minutes of silly faces the zombie punches the thug in the face. So being the logical man you are you tell him to go away and get the other thug to do the same. He lasts nine minutes before getting face punched.

You then decide to order two zombies to go out collecting MP and another two to collect CP. They gather 8CP and 66MP in an hour or so.

During that time you also send out Lieutenant Overpowered and six Servant Zombies to go out and collect bodies. (1+3) Unfortunately apparently they managed to run into a military ambush. Only Overpowered managed to get away from the soldiers. Given their numbers, weapons, locations, refusal to leave the vicinity of the ambush site and possession of tanks you suspect that you're not the target. Whatever the soldiers was after must have been a lot stronger than you to have warranted the amount of attention that it had. Still, Overpowered survived and the soldiers didn't chase him to anywhere near your base so you guess it could have been a lot worse.

You then go and order the Librarian to find out if there are any rumours about you, (9) apparently you're mentioned now and again but there tend to talk about more common topics. Like UFO sightings. Some drunken farmer claimed to have been abducted by them and apparently jokes about the mans alien adventures were now more common than your misdeeds. You spend several hours shouting at things annoyed at this fact.

You then send thugs and two tier 2 (T2) zombies (servant zombies) to go and rob some electronics store for some specific items. (14) They manage to come back with enough various bits pieces to get you some average internet access and a projector! And a half a dozen security cameras. You fit the projector into the conference/ meeting room for now.

You then design and build a base PA system, you manage to build a Good PA System using up only 50MP!

You also briefly consider how many bullets you could get to fire from a gun per second. You decide you'd need some advanced gun knowledge to even try to improve a guns fire rate.

You then build a submarine bay and an armoury to store your guns in. You consider making a submarine but realise you know nothing of ships or submarines.
You then order some servant zombies to go out and hunt some wild animals. (15) they manage to get nine assorted animals and shove them into prison cages. None look like they could dig tunnels though.

You then paint the Bird Zombie multicoloured with your magic and re-name it Rainbow Dash. The Librarian laughs at you.

You then order Rainbow Dash to map the surrounding area. (7) Sadly, it only manages to stay airborne long enough to inform you that the immediate surrounding area of the cave is uninhabited.

You then decide to get the human minions names. The thugs, apparently are both called ‘Bill’ but the Librarian laughs at you for five minutes for waiting so long to ask before saying “Maybe it’s Sarah, you’ll never know now!” You return her into an anteater for that.
You then get a general servant zombie maid to follow you around and get the zombies to create an introductive dance piece of your awesomeness. (10) You manage to organise a sort of average piece.

You finish up trying to make a foam-tentacle thing. (5+1) You fail to make one, you can’t even think why you would need one. If you wanted a marine vehicle with tentacles you could always use an octopus...

Try to fix up bleeding/ breathing/leg before helping HighEndNoob loot Chifwun (and any other corpses nearby?).

Gah! I had a post set up but my internet crashed and I lost all of it, I'll do it tomorow.
 

At ShoesandHats: If you set this game in the same universe as 'You Are A (Beginner) Super-Villain!' (or similar alternate universe or however you're going to set it in relation to mine). Then the puny mortal known as 'The Lady' must face the mighty and unstopable: Mal-Ravanal, Merchant Of Stabbing! With appropriate titles as nessecary. And a zombie horde E.T.C.

If you decide to just have it vaugely simmilar then feel free to use your own imagination. To be honest I don't remember it, I just copy/paste it off the first reply on my thread.

Oh, and since I sorta need to stop this post being a shameless advert then...

Create and master your own martial art involivng about twenty different martial arts moves and a lead pipe.

I hope you guys wouldn't mind if I started up a rival forum game.

You are a (Beginner) Super-hero!

You may have to deal with more than just the cops, soon!

Ha ha ha, please, by all means do! And if you could put a link to it on this thread when you do please?
...

Oh, and I would like to thank you all for arguing over Armoks... Idea, since it means I don't have as many zomborg designs to edit  .  I'm pretty sure I can't turn this into 'You are a shapeshifting guy/girl (G.I.R.L?) who can turn into a girl and has a horde of loyal zombie minions & robots who do as s/he says as s/he has sex a lot' without this thread being locked however. Nor do I really want to, it sounds to complex.

Once in a while is funny though. It makes writing the turns more fun when I can put 'You designed a robotic wong wing to put on your zombies.'

Anyway. It's not really that surprising though given this is the internet, but please if you feel like writing some sort of weird rule 34 based fan-fiction of a 13 page-ish forum game either A) Do it about some other forum game or B) NEVER TELL ME. (Please.)

If you do write a errotic fan-fiction based on a 13 page 'YOU ARE X' game you are sadder than me.
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You consider turning the libarian into a Pangolin (2) but can't find any nearby to get a scale sample or whatever so you just tell her to imagine she's an anteater for a day. She laughs at you.

You then decide to test a theory of yours and find a private corner of the cave to experiment in.

An hour later you come out, female and annoyed that you have failed to find any superpowers. You were sure women would have super-hearing or super shouting-at-you-for-stealing-libary-books or something. Looking in your polymorphic tome of evil (Polymorphing for Noobs- How To Play As A Girl IRL And 500 Different Hax) you find that despite the spell taking up most of the book with its description most of it  was related to 'Fitting in with other Girls IRL'. However this just confuses you further. Every possible encounter detailed seems to either end with 'Theoretical cybersex IRL here' after finding an apparently surprisngly open female who apparently has quite a... Carnal reputation or ends with the impostor chased out for suggesting some 'Hawt Cybersex IRL'.

 It does reveal that real women can detect men polymorphed into women though and after the Libriarian sees you she does start laughing at your, "Hello inferior-mortal-but-at-the-same-time-fellow-female" although you're not sure that was because of the spell rather than logic combined with a lack of respect. Also for some reason it advises finding a private area shortly after changing to... No. Your evil mind fails to comprehend how THAT has anything to do with being evil.

At any rate, having lost your masculinity temporarily to !!Science!! you decide to re-assert it again in the most sensible way you know. By Mad Science. First you replace a zombies arms with wings. This gets you a messed up Bird Zombie. You get it to squak how amazing you are while trying to fly. It sorta manages to stay up in the air for a bit before crashing.

You then design Gun-Bot. Gun-Bot shoots captured enemy guns back at the enemy. This is ironic. Irony is cool. So is Gun-Bot.

You then create an even more drill-y version of the Drill Zombies. This unholy creation (known as Digger-Zombie) has treaded tracks intsead of legs and a drill on each of it's arms. And a drill on its chest. And a drill on it's head. No. You are not compensating for something.

You then build Overpowered-Bot Mk1. Sorta like Leiutenant Overpowered's robotic cousin. It's a bit overpowered.

You then order your drill-based minions to dig you a new lair section because, well you want the Libraians laughter is getting annoying and you suspect you'll need a bigger corner if you ever find a cool dinosaur spell and decide to experiment (no not in THAT way!). (12+8) With the combined effort of all your minions (and a bit of luck) you manage to create a large yet elegant hall! The walls are inscribed with your mighty deeds and images of your mydrad victories (you may have ordered your zombies to make a few up). You show the Libariain it. She spots Digger-Zombie and spends ten minutes laughing. You decide her anteater mind was overwhelmed by the awesome.

You then build a large capacitator and a basic computer, they both are pretty cool though the computer has a shoddy self-made operating system. You try using it to 'surf'  on the 'internet' as you heard some people do. Unfortuneately you, ah... Haz no inernetz (or cheesburgerz for that matter).

You then decide to make the lime green van more manly. To do this you make it purple, sadly it effectively replaces all the lime green with purple and you get no cool flame decals but it's still more manly. You also get rid of the 'CM' logo by replacing that with purple to. Whoever he was, he's probably dead now. You then add a pair of arms (one with a claw hand the other with a robotic hand). You also added a pair of flamethrowers underneath the van which could swivel in a circle. It is now ten times more awesome.

Finally you decide to add some lights in to your cave, you then realize that you have no lighting in your cave, having developed sight akin to that of a dwarfs, capable of seeing in total darkness (luckily you haven't got cave addaption). You realize you need to put some lights up anyway so your zombies and the Librarian can... See. The zombies probably learnt by trial and error but you may want to ask her about that at some point after she stops pretending to be a human pretending to be an anteater pretending to be a human and becomes a real human again (because she's an anteater, remember?). Also you lack lighting.

Oh, and you fiddle around with the zombies brain-remote controls and fashion yourself a zombie-control radio. It's like any other zombie control radio, exactly like a walkie talkie but with the other end in all your zombies brains, you quickly build a zombie-thought filter after hearing some of the one you ordered to create more titles thoughts. No one should have to hear themselves called 'One we would least mind being undead love interst to in a romantic comedy involving gender-swapping spells and zombies.' it's scary.

You decide to do some 'light' reading before you begin, gaining yourself a couple of spells and also getting a basic computer design! You could probably design some more roboty parts or even start designing a basic A.I. now if you wanted to. Speaking of roboty you install your new servant add ons to all the zombies (and thier designs). You also learn the basics of 'liberally converting conservatives to the liberal cause' and some basic facts on architecture you guess could be used to improve digging in your cave. Oh and fiddiling around with peoples brains is slightly less likely to kill them now.

Then, because the voices in your head like randomly casting spells you change your zombies genders (temporarily), getting several humorous surprised groans from suddenly female zombies. You then give General Drill-Hand two black eyes (literally, the entire eye is now black) apparently she's absolutely fine after you fiddle around with her gender and eyes, you were half expecting her zombrynetic implants (yes, you gave them a new name now) to give her brain damage or something as she changed genders.

At any rate you decide to bring Librarian along to the grave yard, you're not sure why but you're sure there's a good reason.

When you arrive however you find (7) a group six of police officers gathered around a grave, from what you overhear of their conversation they're mourning the loss of one of their number after you used imps to get rid of those police cars when robbing a bank. Being the respectfull person you are you use your vans rapid zombie transit device to launch a couple of gender confused zombies into the graveyard. (17) The police are surprised by this rather random turn of events and you quickly aquire six (yes, your zombie making was upgraded) more minions. With the help of Diggerbot and your two Drill Zombies you dig up (13+3) 16 corpses before you finnaly run out of graves to dig up.

As you leave however with your new minions however...
"Heh, looks like you two did get together," an old voice sounds out from behind you.
"Oh not this man again," mutters the libarian as you turn around to see  the old gravedigger leering at you.
"No, we are not dating, I kidnapped her, please address any and all future messages to one of my servants, thank you!" You say as you walk past him"
"Eh? What do y-" He starts before one of your servant zombies interupt him.
"Please adress any and all future messages to one of us to pass one to our master the mighty Mal-Ravanal, Merchant of Stabbing, Robber of Banks, Builder of Average Quality Robots, Van Stealer, Zombie Maker, Action Movie Style Shooter, Amatuer Neuro-Scientist, Designer of Pretty Cool Zomborgs..."

You don't hear the rest of it though as you pass by and load most of your zombies and diggerbot into the van you reach the vans capacity limit at the relatively surprisng number of ten zombies, ar bot and two humans,those of your horde not lucky enough to be allowed in get to walk behind you in a vaugely military shuffle.

Once back you add servant add ons to your new zombies and start designing new parts to attach to zombies like robot hands! And giant wongs to replace said hands! ... Oh, wait, you mean wings, yeah, that was it. Not wongs, that would be stupid. You give Leftenant Overpowered the robotic hands because, well, stuff it. If you're going to have something overpowered you might as well go all the way. You don't give any zombies wings yet however.

You then send all but one of your zombies off to hunt animals for food. This lucky zombie gets (19) several pipes shoved down it's throat a bit more carefully this time, making the worlds first Flamethrower zombie.

You then spend an hour or two improving your van with a spikey covering, it now looks even more awesome.

1714: You wonder whether anyone will manage to read the full list in one sitting before going insane.