... Not sure if good or bad.
Find a person to defend in court.
[2] You find a chirping cricket.
Look for a library.
[2] You find a soggy piece of paper.
USE LEG AS HELICOPTER
RENT SELF OUT AT BIRTHDAY PARTIES
[1-4] OWOWOWOWKWOWKWKWKWLWLWOWLWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Your leg is essentially torn off.
This is a gonarch.
SPAWN AN ARMY OF HEADCRABS.
[5] You do; the headcrabs start maturing.
Spawn an army. Look for something to take over.
Step 1: Decode what the most amusing interpretation of the action is.
Step 2: Decide that that wouldn't be appropriate, go with the second-most.
Step 3: [2] You fail, so never mind.
Keep trying to harvest fungiwood.
Step 1: Find Caverns. [4] You dig around and find caverns.
Step 2: Find Fungiwood. [3] You find a grove of tower-caps.
Step 3: Realize you need an axe.
Step 4: Cry like a little elf.
Step 5: [Nme:5] Hear the roar of a beast best left forgotten...
ask if they know if there are any abandoned bases or something nearby.
"Um...there's one about 20, 30 miles east..."
Turn purgatory into the most fabulous, dramatic, incendiary, fun, horrifying, torturous, rigged, and fair court system ever.
[5-1] You begin work on making Purgatory into a massive oxymoron.