Bay 12 Games Forum

Or, you could limit which seasons in which they're grown. I've found it useful in keeping back the raging tsunami of purple mushrooms.

Well shit, now i actually know how to imagine dorfbolds. It all makes sense! All other kobolds are still seen as little lizardmen, though. D&D has poisoned my mind irreversibly.

Also, you know how us humans tend to make hunting as painless as possible for the killed animals?


Dorfs strongly disagree with that notion. For all intents and purposes, THEY DO HAVE A GATLING CROSSBOW. And they really like to use it. I'm sure we can all agree to this after seeing a hunter try to kill his prey. The big question is, how the hell would they react to getting an actual porcupine for dinner?

That was...


Very gneiss.

Also, i have a hard time imagining the dorfs actually saying anything, so in my head, the conversations are like:

Urist 1: :D
Urist 2: :D
Urist 1: :D?
Urist 2: :D!
Urist 1: :D!!

On a more vocal note though:

Urist McSavvy: Oh man we're under siege by goblins!
Urist McDwerp: We are?
Urist McSavvy: Yeah, didn't you hear the cage trap triggering?
Urist McDwerp: OH MAN THERE IS A CAGE TRAP WITH A GOBLIN IN IT I'D BETTER GO RETRIEVE IT RIGHT NOW
Urist McSavvy: Don't do it man!
Urist McDwerp: SORRY I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF THAT CAGED GOBLIN THAT I AM ABOUT TO RETRIEVE
Goblin LeNotinacage: Oi, there's a dorf! Get him!
Urist McDwerp: NOPE

I wonder what drives them to plough into a group of gobs for a sock. Or a cage.

I bet they're totally looking for DEMONIC TUNDRA TREANTS to cut the fuck down. Then again, treants don't exist. Yet.
And now, my previous comic has been reworked to poke fun at anime.


I think i just lost a piece of my soul. (huge respect to the japanese mangakas but so help me god I WILL NEVER DRAW LIKE THAT AGAIN because it looks ridiculously stupid)
Now to win my piece of soul back.


I feel better already! (also some time later i found out that i had forbidden all silk haha good job me but at least i got to drop a bear on someone)

Or, make their tombs shaped like their beards, and have a forbidden alcohol storage inside, one barrel for every kill they made. That'd be the ultimate honor for any dorf. They get to rest in supersized versions of their own booze-soaked beards!

It would be rather fun to be a mortal adventurer who sought to kill all immortals. I AM URIST MCIMMORTALSLAYER, SLAYER OF IMMORTALS. FEAR MY BEARD.

Thing is, dorfs can be EXTREMELY deadly in a scrap, due to their powerful alcoholism. Oh, and martial trances. If any military dorf gets this glorious blessing of Armok and wades into a group of enemies, then by Armok, HE/SHE IS GOING TO KILL THEM SO BADLY THAT THEIR ANCESTORS GET UP FROM THEIR GRAVES AND EXPLODE. Even dorfs with only moderate weapon skills outside of a trance can be quite formidable in combat, especially against less experienced foes. That being said though, the random number god just hates you sometimes, which will inevitably get your dorfs done in. It's only a matter of time! If you don't want to wait that long, put your dorfs in a room and crush them into the magma sea with a cave-in. If the miner doesn't die, he'll go insane.