I know there's a dream thread, but I'm talking about my reaction to it more than the dream itself;
So last night, I had a dream about my cat. She disappeared two years ago and we haven't seen her since. In my dream, she just showed up at the house, happy and healthy and acting like she never left.
Well, I woke up from that and couldn't help but cry a little. She was an old cat, nearly 17 years old at the time of her disappearance and not exactly the picture of health. We looked for her of course, but she was never found. Even now, though it's more than likely that she died at some point, I can't help but wonder, because I just don't know for sure what happened. For all I know she found a new, loving home and is living fat and spoiled even now. Or maybe she went out for a walk that night she vanished and got attacked by a dog. I just don't know, and it's killing me. Did we give up searching too soon? Did she get lost and was hoping that I'd rescue her?
Sometimes I wish that I simply came home one day and found her dead. Hell, I had started dreading that moment for a good year as her health slowly got worse from old age. It's terrible, but at least I'd have closure and at least she would have passed away safe in her house. But instead this is how it happened, and the fact that I will never, ever know the truth is going to haunt me for a long time.
My eyes are damp from allergies, I swear.