1291
DF Community Games & Stories / Re: "Deadharvested" A Corrosion Mod Community Fortress.
« on: August 18, 2012, 07:31:06 pm »
Now you can't reserve any posts *evil face*
Anyway, good luck!
Anyway, good luck!
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1292
DF Modding / Re: Necromancy failing
« on: August 18, 2012, 07:28:23 pm »
Do you have [CAN_LEARN]?
1293
DF General Discussion / Re: What will happen when Dwarf fortress becomes user friendly? Let's make plans.
« on: August 18, 2012, 07:26:55 pm »
The game's difficulty is much worse than the UI. Really. The UI is pretty simple as soon as you work out the -/+ scrolling, but actually playing the game is hard. So I'm not worried about a bumrush of idiots who start regularly using these forums for some reason.
1294
General Discussion / Re: Let's talk about drugs
« on: August 18, 2012, 07:20:04 pm »
I don't like them.
That's all I end up saying in these threads, because I don't know any drug users personally and I'm a teenager and it's all like "onoez everyone else knows so much moar" so all I learned was from school. Except we didn't seem to get personal scare stories? They just said that drugs were addictive and had no benefits and were expensive which still seems true. Then later on there was this one girl who ended up making me think that everyone defending them were stupid, because we had this lovely conversation:
Girl: I want to find out how much you're ignorant about drugs.
Me: I actually don't want to talk about them.
Girl: You arrogant asshole! What if your friends talk about it and you don't want to and you look stupid?!
Me: *stunned*
Girl: Just answer one question and I'll shut up. How many times do you have to do marijuana to get addicted to it?
Me: Uh, one?
Girl: NO YOU'RE WRONG *long angry tirade*
I probably was wrong (and I've met lots of people who'll tell me all about it), but they all seemed crazy (this girl later went on to kick a guy in the balls for sitting next to her). And so I ended up thinking that you shouldn't do drugs. And then I carefully didn't talk to people about it because they ended up lapsing into crazy mode every time. So that's where I am now, really.
That's all I end up saying in these threads, because I don't know any drug users personally and I'm a teenager and it's all like "onoez everyone else knows so much moar" so all I learned was from school. Except we didn't seem to get personal scare stories? They just said that drugs were addictive and had no benefits and were expensive which still seems true. Then later on there was this one girl who ended up making me think that everyone defending them were stupid, because we had this lovely conversation:
Girl: I want to find out how much you're ignorant about drugs.
Me: I actually don't want to talk about them.
Girl: You arrogant asshole! What if your friends talk about it and you don't want to and you look stupid?!
Me: *stunned*
Girl: Just answer one question and I'll shut up. How many times do you have to do marijuana to get addicted to it?
Me: Uh, one?
Girl: NO YOU'RE WRONG *long angry tirade*
I probably was wrong (and I've met lots of people who'll tell me all about it), but they all seemed crazy (this girl later went on to kick a guy in the balls for sitting next to her). And so I ended up thinking that you shouldn't do drugs. And then I carefully didn't talk to people about it because they ended up lapsing into crazy mode every time. So that's where I am now, really.
1295
DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: Necro910?
« on: August 18, 2012, 06:39:49 pm »
Are they actually unprintable or is this just a forum joke? Because now I'm curious. Even just a PM? I CAN HANDLE THIS
1296
DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: Necro910?
« on: August 18, 2012, 05:49:43 pm »
I spotted him somewhere in Terraria.
1297
DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: Catching the big bad sponges.
« on: August 18, 2012, 05:34:48 pm »I advise channeling out the tile directly below the sponge from underground.So, would the side view look like this?
Code: [Select]
▓▓▓S≈≈
☺☺☺▒▓▓
▓▓▓^▓▓That seems like a pretty good method (assuming your sponge is adjacent to a wall... wait, do fluids flow diagonally downwards?!) if you have a way to curb the flooding. Maybe dam the river, although giant sponges existing in an easily dammable river is a stretch, since they die at first ice, so drain it instead? If it's not already draining into your fort 
1298
DF Suggestions / Re: Religion, Temples and Priests.
« on: August 18, 2012, 12:52:44 pm »
Ah, but what about worship levels?
A more deceitful/uncaring dwarf could gain "levels" (dubious/normal/ardent) slower than more open and trusting dwarfs. Dwarfs who ardently worship a certain god would be more likely to receive miracles or "blessings" from them than a dubious worshipper. Even better, enemies have gods too, who also grant bonuses to them. Perhaps worship could even function like a skill - being possessed and completing an artifact instantly levels the possessee's worship level of the god most closely related to their artifact to the maximum (It menaces with spikes of wax [...] Ardim was associated with wax, love and revenge.), making them more eligible for miracles.
A more deceitful/uncaring dwarf could gain "levels" (dubious/normal/ardent) slower than more open and trusting dwarfs. Dwarfs who ardently worship a certain god would be more likely to receive miracles or "blessings" from them than a dubious worshipper. Even better, enemies have gods too, who also grant bonuses to them. Perhaps worship could even function like a skill - being possessed and completing an artifact instantly levels the possessee's worship level of the god most closely related to their artifact to the maximum (It menaces with spikes of wax [...] Ardim was associated with wax, love and revenge.), making them more eligible for miracles.
1299
General Discussion / Re: Hydroxylic acid: the unknown threat?
« on: August 18, 2012, 12:04:44 pm »I watched that too. It's awesome.Shit, I am posting it to my own facebook if you don't mind just to see my friends go apeshit.
The chemtrails thing cracks me up. I had a buddy once who swore up and down that the government was paying airlines to spray chemicals in the air behind their airplanes to pacify the population.
Promoting awareness is what we're going for here. More the merrier.
And yeah, chemtrails are fun. I still adore Rainbow Lady for her unsung fight against the evils of whatever the gov't is putting in our oxygen supply.
"Everywhere we look... The visible spectrum... Is rainbows."
1300
DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: I badly draw your reports!
« on: August 18, 2012, 11:13:40 am »
It's early, so it's time for a Before Breakfast Special!
Remember, a magma crab is for life, not just Christmas.
"Do you floss daily?"
"Yershff!"
I realized that when it comes to a bunch of dwarves in a pile, colour-coding them by profession is funnier than giving them all pig tail/rope reed shirts.
Remember this guy? Every time you don't specify what the FB was, I'll draw him instead because he's funny.
My current fort, near a Necro tower. After the gobbos and zombies got together and had a great big ole shindig, I sent my dorfs out to clean up the refuse once the party was over.
There was an elf upper arm in a tree that got reanimated before the necro scampered off that was scaring my dorfs as they exited the fortress, preventing them from a) picking anything up, b) going back in the fort, before I finally got a marksdwarf to shoot it to death.
So: an elf arm bone in a tree, causing several dozen of my dorfs to run around in circles.
P.S. This is one of the most win threads I've had the pleasure to read.
This one's not combat, but it should be entertaining:
Remember, a magma crab is for life, not just Christmas.
I just remembered one from a friend playing Adventure mode:
His adventurer had returned to town after dispatching a group of bandits (biting an arm off the bandit leader in the process).
It was after selling the loot from the bandits and walking out of the shop he checked his inventory and found out his adventurer was still latching on to a rotting bandit arm with his teeth...
Imagine the look on the shopkeeper's face.
"Whaf, do I haf somffing im my feefh?"
"Do you floss daily?"
"Yershff!"
I had this LEGENDARY moment when I, as a spearhuman, attacked a badger in adventure mode with my spear.
You charge the badger with your silver spear!
You bite the badger in the left back paw, tearing the skin and tearing the fat!
You shake the badger around in the air!
Yes, I went running towards a badger with both hands gripping my spear and for some reason my first attack was biting him on the back paw and shaking him around with my muscular human mandible, finally tossing him a few squares away.
My avatar. Urist McCartass.
Crossposting from the Facepalm thread:I tried to set up a minecart repeater in my last fortress using a novel (read: buggy) design, but after many problems trying to drop the minecart onto the track from above, finally decided to have a sacrificial dwarf go and push it instead to jumpstart the process. I then unpaused the game and busied myself checking on some crundles who were lingering near my cage traps.
The first dwarf went to go push the minecart. It accelerated as planned, reversed direction as planned, and mowed him over before he could move an inch, grievously injuring the poor sap. Then another dwarf decided to go "recover the wounded" and walked right into the high-speed minecart as it ran him over a third time, bowling her over as well. Then someone decided to go rescue her... This blossomed into thirty dwarves out of fifty dying in the accidental meatgrinder.
At least, that's how I reconstructed the scene after finding a ceiling-high pile of bodies in the minecart oscillator. Never again shall I leave the game unattended.
I realized that when it comes to a bunch of dwarves in a pile, colour-coding them by profession is funnier than giving them all pig tail/rope reed shirts.
The dangers of dust attacks in confined spaces.Code: [Select]The Forgotten Beast breathes a cloud of forgotten beast frozen extract!
The Forgotten Beast is caught in a burst of forgotten beast frozen extract!
The Forgotten Beast is caught in a cloud of forgotten beast boiling extract!
The Stray Dog is caught in a burst of forgotten beast frozen extract!
The Forgotten Beast is caught in a cloud of forgotten beast boiling extract!
The Forgotten Beast is caught in a cloud of forgotten beast boiling extract!
The Forgotten Beast is caught in a cloud of forgotten beast boiling extract!
The Stray Dog is caught in a cloud of forgotten beast boiling extract!
The Forgotten Beast slams into an obstacle!
The Forgotten Beast's left pincer takes the full force of the impact, tearing apart the fat and bruising the muscle!
The Forgotten Beast's right first leg takes the full force of the impact, tearing the fat and bruising the muscle!
The Forgotten Beast is caught in a cloud of forgotten beast boiling extract!
The Forgotten Beast slams into an obstacle!
The phyllite strikes The Forgotten Beast in the right pincer, tearing the fat and bruising the muscle!
The Forgotten Beast is caught in a burst of forgotten beast frozen extract!
The {Kogan's bone [140]} strikes The Forgotten Beast in the right first leg, bruising the muscle!
The flying {copper bolt} strikes The Forgotten Beast in the right first leg, tearing the muscle!
The flying {<F0>copper bolt<F0>} strikes The Forgotten Beast in the right first leg, tearing the muscle!
The flying {<F0>copper bolt<F0>} strikes The Forgotten Beast in the right fourth leg, tearing the muscle!
The flying {<F0>copper bolt<F0>} strikes The Forgotten Beast in the body, tearing the muscle!
The flying {copper bolt} strikes The Forgotten Beast in the right first leg, tearing the muscle!
The {Stray Cat mutilated corpse} strikes The Forgotten Beast in the left fourth leg, tearing the fat and bruising the muscle!
The {Stray Cat right front leg} strikes The Forgotten Beast in the head, tearing the fat and bruising the muscle and bruising the brain!
The Forgotten Beast slams into an obstacle!
TLDR: the FB decided to dust the bait dog, fell into adjacent channel, breathed dust a couple of times there and was killed by {Stray Cat right front leg} that was left there by some previous FB. Don't breathe dust in the vicinity of cat legs.
Remember this guy? Every time you don't specify what the FB was, I'll draw him instead because he's funny.
1301
DF Community Games & Stories / Re: StNPO - 2 - Actually pretty alive!
« on: August 17, 2012, 11:04:12 pm »The problem with my avatar in it's current state is that it's so bad that you couldn't even see what it actually is in order to accurately improve it. It's actually a miner who lost his ass, beard, and arms in a horrible magma-related incident and had his arms replaced with a wheelbarrow and his ass replaced with a minecart in a effort to make him the ultimate hauler.what about my "I badly draw your reports" thread in dwarf mode discussion
[/shamelessplug]
This fortress is awesome, though. I downloaded the Year 4 save. Someone was immediately stricken by melancholy and it took me quite a while to check out which rooms are safe.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
1302
DF Community Games & Stories / Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell (BATTLEFAILED 4) - The Madness Begins
« on: August 17, 2012, 09:13:00 pm »
*eye sparkle*
Awesome.
Please dwarf me.
EDIT: Whoops, I get to be more specific? Okay. I want to be a hammerdwarf. Hammers are nice.
Awesome.
Please dwarf me.
EDIT: Whoops, I get to be more specific? Okay. I want to be a hammerdwarf. Hammers are nice.
1303
DF Community Games & Stories / Re: Bronzebow: Let's Terrifying!
« on: August 17, 2012, 06:40:59 pm »
Urdim's Masonry Log
Obsidian 26, 249
Oh boy! Soon it will be Granitte Mug Day, and another new year will be Rung in! But that ys nott all! Its almost 250, and when we consulted Urist the Mad's latest Pocket Report of Madnesse (can you beleve he's at volume 17 now?!), it says that 250 will bring in great opertunities, riches for all, and slow creeping death for everyone in the Fortriss followed by an attack by an Unholy Betentacléed Abominatione! But everyone knows that poor oldde Urist only Predictes things right about half the time so we can'tt wait! Why was I writing this?? Yes! Today, I was givven the Privilige of hauling Bomrek's Grate of Greatnesse to the Dining Hall so that All Dwarfenkind may admire it! Soon I may be entitled to use one of the Masonry Workshops - notte that Building walls gets tiresome after a few years, but it would be Nice to actually Work the Craft, ha ha.
~~~~~~~~~~
The next few pages are stained with a foul purple liquid.
~~~~~~~~~~
Limestone 17, 250
This damned log! Oh yes, it's all good to trick poor Urdim into winning the Wine-Quaffing Contest even when Lokum Okirurbam, Terror of Ten Thousand Mugges, passes out from plump helmet poisoning. Oh yes. "You can win this, Urdim! One more pint!" Maybe I should have PAID ATTENTION when the LEGENDARY BREWER WAS KNOCKED UNCONSCIOUS. I won a trophy, and it is my only possession that's staying in my bedroom instead of being brought along because big plans are in the works involving my deportation. I don't remember what I did, but I did stagger awake, a week later. The room was full of broken furniture. I asked, "Why aren't you fixing it?" They said "We have been. All week.". Shit! Later, the doctor said that it was a latent allergy that was nudged out of hiding by gross overdosage of the allergen, causing me to go berserk for about four days. Nobody talks to me anymore. I sat, staring at my ceiling, for about three fucking months. I taught myself how to spell properly. I was brought food, probably out of fear, but not a single plump helmet. I'm actually craving one of the damn things now. At least they're dependable, unlike these bastards.
Opal 2, 250
Good news! We're on the road, at last! I realized that it's probably all for the best. I can finally practice my masonry in a secure outpost, and maybe even start my own Granite Mug Day celebration next year.
Obsidian 28, 250
Something terrifying jumped into our caravan and bit off the steering wheel, which made it collapse. In retrospect, buying the Do-Itte-Yourself Easy Caravan may have been a bad idea, and we didn't bring a carpenter. So we're stuck. Oh well, let's get to it!
~~~~~~~~~~
Slate 14, 251
HAPPY GRANITE MUG DAY
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
Cilob's Diary, CONTINUED
Today we lost another fucker. We had finally made a fucking drawbridge to pound that liquefied cat into firmament, and I myself did the mechanisms connecting it to the lever. Unfortunately, Eral was standing under it when it fell.
There was a squelch.
He's gone. It's like he never existed. His pick has vanished too. Fuck. He wasn't a close friend, but another dwarf has died in this hellish place, and this time it's my fault. I pulled that lever. I dropped that fucking bridge. And now he's dead. Rest in peace, Eral. May you forever enjoy being free from this fucking place. Now there are only five of us left. I can feel these hallways getting smaller. What will happen next?! Only one miner left, Ezim. Will she be crushed by a cave-in? Will Olin or Litast snap, and pound the rest of us into paste like they did to that cat? Will Urdim smash my skull with a barrel of wine? I remember the things he did. He's a dangerous bastard. We're all dangerous bastards. The farm plot isn't done yet, but I wedged a single chunk of plump helmet in the hard-packed clay above that bridge, the bridge that killed him. Maybe one day it'll grow into a magnificent ceiling-forest of fungi, and the rich inhabitants of Bronzebow will laugh, and pluck one off the ceiling, and reminisce about the hard old times so they could live their lives of luxury.
P.S.: Fuck those future bastards. When everyone was asleep, I pulled it out, tossed it under the bridge, and threw the lever. I think it's more fitting. Goodbye, Eral. I'm sorry.
Obsidian 26, 249
Oh boy! Soon it will be Granitte Mug Day, and another new year will be Rung in! But that ys nott all! Its almost 250, and when we consulted Urist the Mad's latest Pocket Report of Madnesse (can you beleve he's at volume 17 now?!), it says that 250 will bring in great opertunities, riches for all, and slow creeping death for everyone in the Fortriss followed by an attack by an Unholy Betentacléed Abominatione! But everyone knows that poor oldde Urist only Predictes things right about half the time so we can'tt wait! Why was I writing this?? Yes! Today, I was givven the Privilige of hauling Bomrek's Grate of Greatnesse to the Dining Hall so that All Dwarfenkind may admire it! Soon I may be entitled to use one of the Masonry Workshops - notte that Building walls gets tiresome after a few years, but it would be Nice to actually Work the Craft, ha ha.
~~~~~~~~~~
The next few pages are stained with a foul purple liquid.
~~~~~~~~~~
Limestone 17, 250
This damned log! Oh yes, it's all good to trick poor Urdim into winning the Wine-Quaffing Contest even when Lokum Okirurbam, Terror of Ten Thousand Mugges, passes out from plump helmet poisoning. Oh yes. "You can win this, Urdim! One more pint!" Maybe I should have PAID ATTENTION when the LEGENDARY BREWER WAS KNOCKED UNCONSCIOUS. I won a trophy, and it is my only possession that's staying in my bedroom instead of being brought along because big plans are in the works involving my deportation. I don't remember what I did, but I did stagger awake, a week later. The room was full of broken furniture. I asked, "Why aren't you fixing it?" They said "We have been. All week.". Shit! Later, the doctor said that it was a latent allergy that was nudged out of hiding by gross overdosage of the allergen, causing me to go berserk for about four days. Nobody talks to me anymore. I sat, staring at my ceiling, for about three fucking months. I taught myself how to spell properly. I was brought food, probably out of fear, but not a single plump helmet. I'm actually craving one of the damn things now. At least they're dependable, unlike these bastards.
Opal 2, 250
Good news! We're on the road, at last! I realized that it's probably all for the best. I can finally practice my masonry in a secure outpost, and maybe even start my own Granite Mug Day celebration next year.
Obsidian 28, 250
Something terrifying jumped into our caravan and bit off the steering wheel, which made it collapse. In retrospect, buying the Do-Itte-Yourself Easy Caravan may have been a bad idea, and we didn't bring a carpenter. So we're stuck. Oh well, let's get to it!
~~~~~~~~~~
Slate 14, 251
HAPPY GRANITE MUG DAY
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
Cilob's Diary, CONTINUED
Today we lost another fucker. We had finally made a fucking drawbridge to pound that liquefied cat into firmament, and I myself did the mechanisms connecting it to the lever. Unfortunately, Eral was standing under it when it fell.
There was a squelch.
He's gone. It's like he never existed. His pick has vanished too. Fuck. He wasn't a close friend, but another dwarf has died in this hellish place, and this time it's my fault. I pulled that lever. I dropped that fucking bridge. And now he's dead. Rest in peace, Eral. May you forever enjoy being free from this fucking place. Now there are only five of us left. I can feel these hallways getting smaller. What will happen next?! Only one miner left, Ezim. Will she be crushed by a cave-in? Will Olin or Litast snap, and pound the rest of us into paste like they did to that cat? Will Urdim smash my skull with a barrel of wine? I remember the things he did. He's a dangerous bastard. We're all dangerous bastards. The farm plot isn't done yet, but I wedged a single chunk of plump helmet in the hard-packed clay above that bridge, the bridge that killed him. Maybe one day it'll grow into a magnificent ceiling-forest of fungi, and the rich inhabitants of Bronzebow will laugh, and pluck one off the ceiling, and reminisce about the hard old times so they could live their lives of luxury.
P.S.: Fuck those future bastards. When everyone was asleep, I pulled it out, tossed it under the bridge, and threw the lever. I think it's more fitting. Goodbye, Eral. I'm sorry.
1304
DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: My latest story of FUN!
« on: August 17, 2012, 06:35:38 pm »
They're incapable of destroying walls and fortifications.
1305
DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: I badly draw your reports!
« on: August 17, 2012, 06:00:45 pm »Needs more blood:-snip-
I think this one actually is bad because for some unknowable reason I didn't center the action, so it's a huge waste of space. Also it's rated R for nudity.
Not even that +crystal glass window+ and ☼steel battle axe☼ can cheer Urist McOnlooker up today!