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Messages - lawastooshort

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5401
Roll To Dodge / Re: Roll to Work at GenCorp! Monday:8am
« on: September 14, 2011, 04:14:41 pm »
Monday: 8am

BEEP BEEP BEEP
BEEP BEEP BEEP
BEEP BEEP BEEP


Ah man - it's your alarm clock going off. First day in your new post, don't want to be late now. You hurridly throw on your cheap polyester suit after the quickest of showers and wolf down some breakfast as you get ready to leave. You've got to get to work for 9am - you've got 45 minutes.

How are you getting to work this morning?

5402
Roll To Dodge / Re: Roll against Video Game Bosses!
« on: September 14, 2011, 04:06:52 pm »
:p

I am Derm, Destroyer of RTD's!

Activator of Waiting Lists!

5403
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Random Content Generation: The RPG
« on: September 14, 2011, 04:05:54 pm »
Appreciative of the... appreciation, Kaevan took up his accordion again and began blasting out some quite heavy traditional folk from his native region. He thought about singing again, but realised he'd forgotten the words. His eyes glazed over as he started making up some more.

Well, you know I'm a reluctant shaman but I,
I wish I was a reluctant womaniser;
I was your trusted farmhand,
How could you ever do that to me?


His voice drifted off back into his reverie.


Spoiler: Kaevan (click to show/hide)

5404
Roll To Dodge / Re: Roll against Video Game Bosses!
« on: September 14, 2011, 03:45:14 pm »
Oh SWEET.

[6] for derm please.


Waiting List: Activate!

5405
Roll To Dodge / Re: Roll against Video Game Bosses!
« on: September 14, 2011, 03:43:25 pm »
Call down the Infinite might of the sun!

Oh god yes. Literally?

5406
Forum Games and Roleplaying / Re: Random Content Generation: The RPG
« on: September 14, 2011, 03:41:57 pm »
Kaevan stopped his singing. He was, after all, a compassionate type, and he understood that perhaps his new found companions would prefer some of his bardic accordion. It wasn't long before some bardicly accordionic and soothing sounds drifted out of the wagon; it wasn't much longer till he jumped up in high pitched wrathful anger - probably to cover his petrified terror - shouting:

"A beetle! A beetle! Get that thing away from me!"


Spoiler: Kaevan (click to show/hide)

5407
Roll To Dodge / Re: Roll to Work at GenCorp!
« on: September 14, 2011, 03:31:36 pm »
All in. For the Glory of Bruce Halford!

Still open for new applicants.

5408
Roll To Dodge / Re: Roll against Video Game Bosses!
« on: September 14, 2011, 03:28:27 pm »
Stab him in the eyes with my dagger!

5409
1. Go to a nearby mobile phone store.
2. Get a job dancevertising out front, tell them you brought your own costume.
3. ???
4. DOUBLE PROFIT

Extrayes.

5410
Roll To Dodge / Re: Roll to Work at GenCorp!
« on: September 14, 2011, 11:04:48 am »
CEO:
4 - Ochita
Spoiler: Daniel (click to show/hide)
Failure Rating: 11.
Morale: -8.

Banned from the premises:
2 - Frelock - quit his job after vomiting all over the boss without having completed a single task in the one morning he was employed.
Spoiler: Fredrick Miller (click to show/hide)
Failure Rating: 19.
Morale: 5.

5 - Tosca_cake92 – accidentally decapitated after leading a violent employee insurgency without having completed a single task in the half day he was employed.
Spoiler: Toby Raah (click to show/hide)
Failure Rating: 47.
Morale: -12.

1 - Dwarmin - jacked it all in after realising her professional life wasn't going anywhere and that Kosher Sandwich shops are, without having completed a single task in the day she was employed. Reestablished sisterly bond. Indirectly responsible for Toby Raah's death, as well as that of several hundred of her colleagues.
Spoiler: Kathryn White (click to show/hide)
Failure Rating: 21.
Morale: 8.

6 - SeriousConcentrate - suffering from pigeon fatigue, decided to live his dreams of customising bikes and fixing electrical appliances and so quit, without telling anyone. Actually completed many tasks successfully. Haz date. Killed many pigeons.
Spoiler:  Matsumura Satoshi (click to show/hide)
Failure Rating: 17.
Morale: 11.

3 - Toaster - having worked hard all morning, fell into alcoholism, then a lift shaft, and then love, prompting him to sell all his possessions and tour the country with his new found love in a camper van. Deliriously happy.
Spoiler: Larry Thrakor (click to show/hide)
Failure Rating: 27.
Morale:15.

9 – Firelordsky – sliced to pieces by a man with no arms, legs or head after suffering a heart attack and a stroke! Suffered Process B after defying Bruce Halford. Bravely stood his ground.
Spoiler: Alex Klag (click to show/hide)
Failure Rating: 11.
Morale: -3.

7 - Powder Miner - limbless and headless, asploded in a shower of BERSERKCUTTER'S SLASHRAGE, slaying Ryan Lovecroft and a herd of robovelociraptornators. Probably killed more people, trees and dinosaurs than any other employee.
Spoiler: Powder Woodcutter (click to show/hide)
Failure Rating: 28.
Morale: 8.

11 - Noodlerex - decapitated Powder Woocutter and then paid for it with his life! The second contestant to be slain by the headless wonder. Professionally was quite a success.
Spoiler: Ryan Lovechild (click to show/hide)
Failure Rating: 9.
Morale: -9.

10 - Yoink - witnessed a murder and paid for it with his life, but at least got to live out his dinorobot fantasies, which alas all ended tragically. Broke his arms in a pterodactyl crash and then licked one of them off. Died of a split brain.
Spoiler: Danny (click to show/hide)
Failure Rating: 17.
Morale: -10.

8 - Theodolus - murdered a fellow receptionist because she was fat and pursued the witness until he died of a fatal tv accident in a long running death vendetta. Horribly disfigured. Inferno Stare! pioneer. Died of being smashed into tiny pieces.
Spoiler: Tracy Arkins (click to show/hide)
Failure Rating: 38.
Morale: -8.

12- Sinpwn - quite a late comer, Sinclair earned renown as the ender of the Halford family line: Slayer of Bruce and Anna Halford. Pioneer of robolimbs after the violent severing of his arm, leg and ears. Died of being exploded in a jet.
Spoiler: Sinclair Sleen (click to show/hide)
Failure Rating: 10.
Morale: 0.

5411
Roll To Dodge / Roll to Work at GenCorp! Tuesday: The End: A New CEO.
« on: September 14, 2011, 11:03:50 am »
This is an RTD based on the… less... awesome parts of my previous professional experiences.

Spoiler: Disclaimer (click to show/hide)

It’s that time of the year again: end of the summer, back to school, back to work, etc. and so forth.

Perhaps you don’t have to go back to work? Perhaps you don’t have a work to go back to? Perhaps your work is excruciatingly tedious (at times)?

Why not come and Roll to Work at GenCorp Research?! We have exciting office work available for all you ambitious young types willing to work your way to the top! Or further from the bottom! It may be excruciatingly tedious (at times) but it’s a foot in the door!

What could possibly go wrong?



The aim of the game for you underpaid and underappreciated assistants is simply to make it to the next working day whilst trying to balance your morale and your sheer failure-ness. Fail too hard? You’ll get sacked. Be the worse failure at the end of each day? You’ll get sacked. Morale too low? You’ll probably get sacked, if your boss notices. Morale waaaaay too low? You’ll probably resign in a fit of depression and go back to live at mum and dad’s. At least they won't get you sorting, photocopying, stapling and then filing six thousand sets of questionnaires in a basement archive with no windows and the new guy who only eats lentil dahl.

Your Failure Rating will go up when you fail at your simple tasks. Your Morale will go up as a result of various things – perhaps that hot new colleague didn’t totally ignore you this morning when you went to make a coffee. Perhaps the dude at the desk next to you didn’t whine about people not taking their turn washing the office cutlery. It will more probably go down though.

Rules are simple. You will be asked (or not, you’re probably unimportant enough to get ignored for a few hours at a time) to do office work. Hour by hour the day will go by. You will fail. Your morale will drop. Sometimes the boss will check up on you. You will fail. Your morale will drop.


Spoiler: Sample Character Sheet
(click to show/hide)


Ackowledgements:

Thanks to SeriousConcentrate for GenCorp.

Thanks to Toaster for providing a game walkthrough.

Thanks to Accidental Toilet for in-game musical content.

Thanks to MC Alfred for providing the GenCorp Staff Statement:

Theirs not to make reply,
Theirs not to reason why,
Theirs but to do and die.
Into the valley of Death
Rode the secretarial sub-under-assistants.


5412
Roll To Dodge / Re: Roller's Block (RTD Brainstorming Thread)
« on: September 14, 2011, 10:51:47 am »
Nothing to say it's going be good yet ;)


Anyway, I'll put you down Dwarmin.

If Bruce Halford isn't the CEO of GenCorp I'm gonna call shenanigans. :3

I guess he is, but you'll never be important enough to find out... (also: thanks)

5413
Roll To Dodge / Re: Roller's Block (RTD Brainstorming Thread)
« on: September 14, 2011, 10:09:25 am »
Sorry for bumping, and so on. Edit: Ooh, I didn't, someone else got there first.


I’m thinking about running an RTD based on the… less... awesome parts of my previous professional experiences (thanks to whoever I got GenCorp from…):



It’s that time of the year again: end of the summer, back to school, back to work, etc. and so forth.

Perhaps you don’t have to go back to work? Perhaps you don’t have a work to go back to? Perhaps your work is excruciatingly tedious (at times)?

Why not come and Roll to Work at GenCorp Research?! We have exciting office work available for all you ambitious young types willing to work your way to the top! It may be excruciatingly tedious (at times) but it’s a foot in the door!

What could possibly go wrong?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)


The aim of the game for you underpaid and underappreciated assistants is simply to make it to the next working day whilst trying to balance your morale and your sheer failure-ness. Fail too hard? You’ll get sacked. Be the worse failure at the end of each day? You’ll get sacked. Morale too low? You’ll probably get sacked, if your boss notices. Morale waaaaay too low? You’ll probably resign in a fit of depression and go back to live at mum and dad’s.

Your Failure Rating will go up when you fail at your simple tasks. Your Morale will go up as a result of various things – perhaps that hot new colleague didn’t totally ignore you this morning when you went to make a coffee. Perhaps the dude at the desk next to you didn’t whine about people not taking their turn washing the office cutlery.

Rules will be, surprisingly, simple. You will be asked (or not, you’re probably unimportant enough to get ignored for a few hours at a time) to do office work. Hour by hour the day will go by. Your morale will drop.


Sample Character Sheet:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)


Any interest? I’m only going to accept two pre-ins and five starters, I think, to be more open and stuff, and anyhow I'd anticipate a lot of sackings.

5414
Vinny - but you can call me Del - Del Pino

5415
Roll To Dodge / Re: Roll to Be a Gentleman Spy - Chapter Two, Part One
« on: September 14, 2011, 06:47:52 am »
a-nother genuine moment of pre-lunch confusion.

Anyway. Do you have an action?

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