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DF General Discussion / Scariest Historical figures
« on: April 26, 2009, 08:27:53 am »
So, I generated a new world. On this new world, there is an elven civilisation called "The Cooperative Shore" who are, in fact, not very cooperative at all - instead, they like going to war. With anyone and everyone. They have the (by far) the longest entry in the civilisations list. And what seemed to happen is that a few names would keep coming back as leading the valiant humans against these evil marauding elves - most of them with titles. SO I started looking them up, and came across this fellow:
"Melbe Tummybrush the homely pick of fishes was a human born in 53."
I started scrolling down. He killed some elves. I scrolled down. He killed more elves. I scrolled down. And down. And down. The man had seventy three(!) kills, and every single one of them an elf! He died, eventually, of old age. He was born in 53, but his first fight was in 100 - and his first kill in 155. He killed seventy three elves after hitting 102!
I thought that was impressive, but then I came across the leader of another civ harrassed by The Cooperative Shore. Jal Authoredpassed the Umbral Dots of Heat. Her father had notched up a title of his own, so she clearly came from fighting stock. At the age of 12, she became a guard (and incidentally got married). She got into her first fight with an elf the next year, but though she beat him, the bastard got away. The lucky bastard. Later that year she smashed and elf's left hand and the killed her first elf. The first of many.
By the end of that year, she had become the leader of her subfaction, having proven her worth over the bodies of many, many dead elves. Over the course of her life, she shot and killed one hundred and eighty three elves before she was, herself, shot and killed (by an elf, incidentally, who picked up a cool 14 kills himself). She had been at war more or less constantly for about 70 years.
That's scary.
"Melbe Tummybrush the homely pick of fishes was a human born in 53."
I started scrolling down. He killed some elves. I scrolled down. He killed more elves. I scrolled down. And down. And down. The man had seventy three(!) kills, and every single one of them an elf! He died, eventually, of old age. He was born in 53, but his first fight was in 100 - and his first kill in 155. He killed seventy three elves after hitting 102!
I thought that was impressive, but then I came across the leader of another civ harrassed by The Cooperative Shore. Jal Authoredpassed the Umbral Dots of Heat. Her father had notched up a title of his own, so she clearly came from fighting stock. At the age of 12, she became a guard (and incidentally got married). She got into her first fight with an elf the next year, but though she beat him, the bastard got away. The lucky bastard. Later that year she smashed and elf's left hand and the killed her first elf. The first of many.
By the end of that year, she had become the leader of her subfaction, having proven her worth over the bodies of many, many dead elves. Over the course of her life, she shot and killed one hundred and eighty three elves before she was, herself, shot and killed (by an elf, incidentally, who picked up a cool 14 kills himself). She had been at war more or less constantly for about 70 years.
That's scary.
. Maybe "being sent to the lower quarters" will become a dwarven euphemism for summary drowning?