Bay 12 Games Forum

Ooohhh... reagents... 

*is drawn in like moth to flame*

You mine it, like rock. Go into your rock menu and set it as economic, so your dwarves won't make stonecrafts out of it.

I'm afraid I would be quite a boring inhabitant. I'd probably be a wonderful bookkeeper... which is about the most boring job in the world except to people like me who love keeping lists, arranging data, and generally being picky about patterns and precision. In real life, I'm a psychology/engineering student with an aim to go to graduate school and design assistive technology, with a focus on research. Some of the best times of my life have been spent making Excel and various specialized statistics programs turn thousands of numbers into graphs and p-values. Sometimes I even do it for school or work. 

In DF, I'd be one of those bookkeepers who just kind of stays at the desk all the time until they start flashing blue arrows, and random dwarves keep complaining that they can't bring them water because there aren't any buckets, and keep updating stockpile records even when you got to Highest Precision fifteen years ago.

Yeah, boring, to anybody but a statistics geek. But it's my kind of life. Not that I wouldn't be willing to bite the fingers off invaders if they disturbed me at my work. Do not dare touch my circles! And I won't be near as passive about it as a certain ancient mathematician. You stop me from counting on my fingers, and I will bite off your fingers, one-by one, very precisely. And then I will go back to counting blocks of microcline.

Well, there was the time a bronze colossus attacked the fort. Wasn't anywhere near ready to deal with it so I just pulled up the bridge and waited. At which point I got a siege and a group of migrants all at once. The colossus pounded the siege to bits, and almost all of the migrants died in the crossfire. One of the remaining migrants, a fish cleaner if I recall correctly, started running in circles around the map, with the colossus chasing him. Once they got to the far corner I lowered the bridge, allowing the two surviving migrants to make a break for it and get inside. The fish cleaner led the colossus straight into a troll I hadn't known even existed, the colossus went for the troll, and the troll somehow managed to kill the colossus in a single blow. The fish cleaner casually beheaded the troll and strolled inside. And we had a lovely masterwork bronze statue for the rest of the fort's existence...

Not exactly a fluffy wambler, but still pretty cool.

Well, when I was relatively new to DF, I had a FB whose syndrome somehow caused dwarves' arms to drop off. I don't know how it happened or why it was arms and not feet, and I regret not saving the fort to play around with it... but there ya go. Back then, I didn't know that this actually had potential, and that you shouldn't necessarily abandon a fort because you're tired of "Urist McArmless Cancels Pick Up Equipment."

Married women don't go in the military. Unlike human females, they are pregnant by default, and you never know when they'll use their babies as impromptu shields. I don't like tantrum spirals nearly that much.

Yeah, right. The FPS would grind down to zero.

I don't see why you want to kill them. Put them to work harvesting your crops; that's what my dwarf kids do. Sometimes I use Dwarf Therapist to turn them into miners, but usually they just farm.

You can burrow them in their bedrooms and dump some food and booze in there with them. Keeps 'em from messing with your FPS so much. And make sure to set your child cap to something reasonable.