Bay 12 Games Forum

5: Swimming in winter. Enough said.
4: Minotaur grabbed me by the ear and threw me into a wall, where I detonated on impact.
3: Evade night creatures only to stumble into a hostile bandit camp
2: Horse
1: A narrow man or something like that stabs my eyes out with his meat cleaver, then slowly cuts off my extremeties until I bleed to death, having passed out from pain when he punched me in the foot.

Edit: 2 more:
1: Former adventurers that I retire in the town that I killed everyone in just now, oh god I'm so sorry Urist McBadass...
2: <Genesis Mod> Cast petrification spell, forget to throw it, get caught in a burst of petrification, laugh it off, then five turns later completely paralyzed. The groundhog I was training on beat the sh*t out of me until I eventually suffocated.

The first time I played Genesis Mod, I was very excited, so I genned a very high savagery world to give me a challenge. Bad idea. First day out as a shield dwarf: 17 giant capybaras. Fortunately no injuries. Next day: more capybaras. And again. And again. AND AGAIN. The, on the whatever day that this poor harrassed shield dwarf was adventuring, desperately trying to find a town to retire in, he got ambushed by a pack of about 15 giant capybaras and about 10 velociraptors. I went down swinging, cutting off limbs at random, biting claws, the whole deal. I killed 3 raptors and 5 capys before I went down, having my throat torn open. The raptors then turned on the capybarqas, covering my corpse in (more) gore and guts. Not bad for a first.

I once made an adventurer in Genesis Mod named Karki Boneruns the Gilded Glow. He was a wyvern, because I was feeling lazy and wanted to see what I could do as one of the deadly creatures of Genesis. Karki was an odd fellow; he liked biting
people in obscure places and waiting until they melted to death. One day, after having a wonderful time killing a village of centaurs, he decided to go clear out a bandit camp. He went there, only to find one of my previous adventurers already there, killing the crap out of everyone there. I decided to help him, and the first thing he does after killing everyone there is shield-bash me in the head, killing me. I later looked in Karki's Legends file and found out his corpse was mounted on a pike. Never going there again.

EDIT: First post. I've lurked for a while and I think I've finally found a community crazier than me! I'll have to work on my skills!