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7741
DF Community Games & Stories / Re: I have become a dark lord
« on: October 08, 2012, 01:25:05 pm »
Okay, I found a passage deeper into the earth. Kamca is looking tired, so I rest the night. When I woke up, she wasn't there. I hear some growling echoing through the caves.

My coins don't disappear any more when I drop them, but I am already hopelessly lost.

7742
74. Get your legs back, use them as bludgeons.

7743
DF Community Games & Stories / Re: I have become a dark lord
« on: October 08, 2012, 12:34:09 am »
There is dark magic in these caves. My coins are dissapearing the moment they hit the ground. I keep going anyway. Something never wants me to return to the surface.

Giant cave spider silk webs. There are far worse things than spiders in the depths of the world.

7744
DF Community Games & Stories / Re: The Pick and the Plump Helmet
« on: October 07, 2012, 11:08:46 pm »
haha this is awesome! I wanna be dorfed.

7745
I just realized that light switches are just small levers, then I went and flipped it on and off a lot. I think I might me going insane. Now I want to replace all the light switches in my house with big dwarven levers. Maybe when I move out of my parent house.

7746
DF Community Games & Stories / Re: I have become a dark lord
« on: October 07, 2012, 10:37:59 pm »
I marked the caves location on my map, then return to civilization. I'm so thirsty, I haven't drank any blood in weeks.

I find a lair, and go in. There I find 2 gloom brutes, should be easy. I stab the larger one through the belly with my sword, then the smaller one gores me in the left hand with his horns. I let go of my sword, and the larger one runs back into the cave, my sword still stuck in its belly. I take out my masterpiece iron knife, the same one I took from the demon Sapi Hoodfrog. I have never used this knife before, never lost my sword before.

I slash at the smaller (and more skilled it seems) one barely cutting the skin, then it punches me in the left shoulder, breaking it. I really need blood. I slash at it's weird fingerless hand, tearing the fat, then it gores me in the left lower arm. The other gloom brute returns, for the first time in my life, I feel true rage. HOW DARE HE TAKE MY SWORD? AND STOP BREAKING MY LEFT ARM, IT'S ALREADY BROKEN! I come out of my rage trance, and both the night creatures are dead. The smaller one has a knife stuck in its heart, and the larger one is missing its head. I am holding my sword.

I rest in the lair, until my arm heals. Then I set out in search of money and blood. My first stop is the kobold camp I raided a while ago. I see a shocking, disgusting sight there. All my dead companions are impaled on upright pikes. This means some kobolds have survived, but they aren't here now. I gather their corpses, and set them around a large oak tree, with all their weapons and the weapons of their enemies, then I set the tree on fire. This removes my temptation to reanimate them. I also gather up all the coins in the encampment, over 500. Should be enough to go to hell and back.

Last stop, I go to a human town. It is night, so everyone is sleeping. I feed on a child, then wake up everyone in the shack and accuse one of them for being a vampire. Turns out, he actually was a vampire assuming a false identity. I slay him then wait until morning, then I wander around town looking to recruit for my expedition to hell. I find one suitable recruit : Kamca Buttonedstill, a female miner. We set off on our expedition.

Near the cave entrance, Kamca runs off. I find her missing a foot next to a dead goat. Oh well, she'll just have to crawl.

When I reach the large cavern, I start dropping a trail of coins. I hope this works.

7747
DF Community Games & Stories / Re: I have become a dark lord
« on: October 07, 2012, 05:34:46 pm »
I have a plan. I will get lots of coins. Then I will drop one every few steps and use it to find my way back to the surface.

7748
What did you do Aseaheru ?!

7749
Hey guize, I have super-Brilliant Idea!!!

We should, for the next update of the mod, create a thieving grazer animal called the "Wild SpamBot". And then, in honor of the first ever sentient spambot, we should make a skulking civ to replace the kobolds, which would comprise spambots that have gained sentience.

I second this.

That is a brilliant idea

7750
69

7751
DF Community Games & Stories / Re: I have become a dark lord
« on: October 07, 2012, 02:16:53 pm »
New update!
Thomo Practicefights is not done with adventuring. There is still more evil in the world that needs to be slain.
I walk around town recruiting people to my cause. I am joined by 2 archers, a lasher, a pikeman, a swordsman, and 8 miners. One of the archers is wearing 4 mailshirts.

We start by killing a few werebeasts, to give them confidence. I take a weregecko head and put it in my pack. I wonder if a zombie werebeast bite will still infect someone?

We travel to a human castle in search of a quest. A guard tells me that the lord of this castle is a vampire. He killed hundreds of people. The axeman joins me, he is trying to wield a greataxe and a shield. Either get a smaller axe or drop the shield. I walk up to the lord, shout "die evil creature of the night!" then I slash off his head. I head to a different castle, because now there is no one to get a quest from.

I go to the next castle and ask the lord for a quest. He tells me to go slay a bandit living in the sewers. Nope, not gonna happen! I ask a armourer for quests, but he just tells me to ask the lord. Then I ask him about the surrounding area, and he tells me of a nearby kobold camp. We have our quest!

At the kobold camp there are about 30 kobolds sitting around admiring their loot. We run in, and start the battle. For every 2 kobolds we slay, one of my companions dies. The kobold archers are the biggest threat. I am hit by an arrow in my elbow, and drop my shield but keep fighting. Then a silver arrow hits me right at the lower spine. It is stopped by my armour, but hits with enough force to chip my lower spine bone and bruise the nerve tissue. I crawl away from the fighting, batting tens of arrows out of the sky with my sword.

I sneak away from the battle, and rest the night in a small cave. 5 of my companions also make it out, most of them permanently injured. Tomorrow, I can stand. I go to get my revenge on the kobolds, they still have my shield. It appears the kobolds faired as bad as we did. There are less than 10 left. The battle goes well and we lose no one else. I get my shield back. Then I realize I still have an arrow sticking out my elbow, so I pull it out. Blood spurts out, but it stops soon and I can use my elbow again.

Our next foe is a night troll. It poses no challenge, and I manage to get every part in the red before it dies.

Our next foe is Odom Rainsoaked the Raw Beard of Mosses the brush titan. It is a very long trek into the northern wastelands. My companions abandon me shortly into the journey. I don't need them anyway. I make it to the titan's shrine, It is filled with corpses and webs. I catch a glimpse of the titan, he is a giant quadruped made of mud with 3 very long horns, and one of his horns is broken off. I sneak around the shrine, and he doesn't notice me. I bash him once in the head with my shield, and his head goes flying off. I can't zombify it because it is made of mud not flesh.

On the way back to civilization, I find a cave. The cave leads down into a cavern.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

7752
You should dorf/forumite Memory. That was the spambots name. He was pretty cool for a spambot.

Also, I am dreading my turn. Almost killed my last fort.

7753
Use this if you want to heal your spine.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Page 68




7754
DF Gameplay Questions / Re: Anvil Trap?
« on: October 06, 2012, 11:10:19 pm »
If I drop them from higher up, will that make them more dangerous?

7755
Lol at first I thought you were storing arrows in your snapping turtle neck. That would be silly.
I think you have something in your teeth though.

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