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« on: March 31, 2013, 03:23:49 am »
Maybe you need something more meaningful in your life. It sounds like the things you do, and the things you want to do, are all pretty superficial. Not judging here, it happens to a lot of people, me included. Unfortunately, when nothing you do or experience really matters, it can be difficult to self-motivate, and to take pleasure or even notice when the small things go right. Perhaps the solution is to get involved in something that's important to you, and where your action or inaction makes a significant impact.
I don't mean to suggest you put yourself into a position where you will quite literally die if you don't get your act together (although that certainly got me out of my own rut), but perhaps you could volunteer your time to a cause you feel strongly about, or teach yourself a new skill that you think will be important to your quality of life in the future, or take care of an abused animal, something like that. Find something that you care about and that you can do, something for which it doesn't matter what your crappy family thinks, whether the teachers are working, or how many friends you make for doing it, all that matters is your own performance and the results... then get out and do it. Do it so hard and persistently that you end up every day banged up, sore, and completely exhausted. If nothing else it should start you eating and sleeping more effectively. You'll have to, just to recover the energy you're expending to whatever it is you're doing.