Bay 12 Games Forum

highlight of today's dream: lovecraftian burlesque dancer, famous for her "skinless sultana" act

it's one where one of the tentacles she uses like a particularly enthusiastic feather boa swings out, then slams back into her, causing her flesh to temporarily splash out in a cascade of worms, leaving a shimmying, singing skeleton for a few moments

no joke one of the most impressive things i can recall dream brain producing, but seriously, what the fuck dream brain

relevant to the dream, she was actually dead sometime prior to it, with her lover devastated and clandestiningly turning young sibling orphans into merged eyeball beasts because of it. pair of magic detectives come in for something else (loverboy was hosting the participants for some kind of tournament thing, still had some neat stuff going on but far less interesting than the mystery fiction interrupt), find his secret chamber with the eyeball monster squirreled away, end up putting down the monsterous bastard turning children into nightmare things

overall it was pretty damn interesting, but the risque dancer using tentacles and fleshshaping as a part of their act was definitely the most interesting

Leg has broke off my glasses, now being held sorta' together with duct tape. Friday at earliest before I can do anything about it. Probably going to cause headaches, blegh.

Frame had a good run, I guess. Thing's at least six, seven years old, probably older. Gone through hell, pretty sure it's been run over before... flex frame titanium stuff is pretty damn sturdy. Finally gave out, though

It's my understanding you can get really fancy with them!

... you can also dump a pile of meat in a bag full of applesauce and leave it in the fridge overnight and make something delicious. So, y'know. Plenty of space to play with

e: also finally got around to trying to make home fries in our air fryer, which, uh. Take potatoes, cut them into 8ths long ways, then half everything (basically cut them into 16ths), season to taste, fry at 400f for about 15-18 minutes. Turns out it's stupid easy. Seasoning this time was olive oil, paprika, black pepper, and curry powder. Was pretty okay! Definitely could have used salt (or something equivalent), but 2/3rds* of the people I was cooking for are supposed to be minimizing the stuff, so.

*among which is now me, which is... probably going to lead to a lot more cooking in the future. It is goddamn impossible to find unsalted frozen or otherwise preprepared food, especially at a price point that isn't ridiculous.

Wuxia/xianxia undead in general get pretty wild, tbh. They're generally in even higher magic settings than your average D&D campaign, in a situation where literally everyone of note functionally has gish levels (where they learn spells like wizards, but cast more like sorcerers and can pretty universally beat the everloving shit out of someone) and weird esoteric stuff is basically bog standard for even lower level critters. Start reanimating those things and there's little telling what's going to happen, heh.

How would your average D&D party even deal with a zombie that just picked up a river and is trying to hit them with it? Not even drown or whatever, they're using the river as a stick.

Well, they're talking about spitroasting long pig, so I'm pretty sure it's actually describing an increasingly elaborate sexual act, for some reason.

At least they're suggesting to slice the pineapple before putting it inside anyone, which I guess is better than alternatives? Probably.

There really should be a One Punch Man game, where you're playing a generic JRPG, but all combat is just one button that immediately wins the fight and everyone goes 'Whaaat!?'

I can't remember titles right now, but I'm like 90% sure something like that actually exists. There's rpgs out there were you basically start with an end game character and stomp all over most/all of the combat involved, usually as part of a parody effort or somethin'.

If you're going outside of games, that's probably a sizeable chunk of light novels or similar works, heh. Though, uh, less (intentional) parody on that front, generally for the worse

Maybe try checking out some of the Kemco lineup? There's probably something in those things that more or less matches that, and they largely match the conditional of "generic rpg" pretty well.