Eh. A parent saying something like that and then crying over money issues when the kid isn't around or has left the house, or quietly getting another job (or two, or pursuing any number of alternate income sources) when things get tight, or being on any number of anti-whatever medication, or so on, and so forth, is common enough to be a stereotype for a reason. Particularly single parents, which it sounds like you're talking about (incidentally, mine could check off all three of those at one point or another, ha). Living on your own also obviously enough distorts a lot of the considerations involved... though it also tends to be less secure even if the per-person income involved is more or less identical. Extra set of hands can make a difference even if they're not bringing in more money.
It's entirely possible it actually went well for you folks (and in which case damn sincere congratulations --
no one should have to deal with the shit that crops up in these economic brackets at the rate they do), but it's stupid easy for it not to for people in that situation (particularly as more dependants get involved) and there's pretty close to precisely fuck all they (your mother included) can do if things go the sort of south they very easily can, if there's not someone (government, if it comes to it) able and willing to bail them out. Sub 30k a year, one 300k medical bill the insurance company (you hopefully have) wiggles out of and you just flat lost the gross income of a decade plus, assuming you can find a way to cover it... and while that's high end of the holy shit catastrophe range, something in the five digit range over the course of a year (i.e. potentially sending a year plus's gross income up in smoke) is much less so. It might be exaggerating somewhat, but frankly about the only way you're going to find much comfort in that sort of fiscal situation is ignorance, bleh, because you are very seriously one step from ruin in many, many, cases.
You can still live pretty happily, if it comes down to it, but it's generally real damn contingent on luck or having some other source of aid. Nonexistent gods be with you, there's actually official support systems of one sort or another in your area that you can take advantage of if it happens, but... this is the US, and that ain't exactly a guarantee.
And I mean I'm only 25, so it's not like this has changed much (and since I still live in the area I can say that it hasn't). Anyway some of the neighbours have piles of kids and seem to be doing fine, although I don't pry into their incomes. Incidentally, our schools are decent, too, especially if your kids are athletic.
Good for y'all, such as it is. Decent school really does help, particularly if they're actually getting funded instead of being gutted by whatever bullshit the local conservatives have spearheaded
this time. Thaaat said, seems to be doing fine is... well, real easy to be wrong when the doors close and whatnot. Met more that a few dysfunctional as all hell, never mind the cases of actual abuse of one sort or another, families that looked just fine from a distance. People can put a fair bit more into appearances than they do into health, yeh, or just have stuff going on that's hard to notice without fairly close interaction.
I think we might have a major disagreement on what constitutes "rural", though. In particular the idea of "rampant thievery or gun fights going on in the neighborhood" implies something more suburban at minimum to me.
... sure, which is why that was a somewhat oblique mention of specifically the worse off of suburban and urban areas, where lower cost housing can at times have the downside of having good reason to dodge the occasional bullet or make sure you got real good locks (or real bad ones, so it won't piss off whoever's decided to filch yer shit).
Rural doesn't tend to have much open gun fighting or thievery anyone will talk about, just theft people don't talk about or report 'cause they know the folks involved, domestic violence and/or homicide, and your occasional bit of effective or explicit suicide (though the latter two are totes city problems, too, of course), heh. Among whatever else is or isn't shared between the two.
