So, I visit the fortress of Handlecharcoal, attempting to find the baron Lokum Snakeskeys who reportedly wants an artifact returned to him. As I descend the central stairway, though, I overhear some heated discussions going on below:

All the nobility of this Dwarven kingdom are apparently gathered in this one fortress, and they're all holding artifacts. And they all want each other's artifacts.
I couldn't tell how anyone responded to these demands, but a few steps later I encounter fleeing dwarves, all shouting "There's fighting! What's going on?"

Sure enough, the nobles are kicking, biting, clawing, and bashing each other over the head with their artifacts -- while the peasantry just stand around watching.


Even the general's in on it.
As with all good Dwarven tantrums, it ends in a combination of tragedy and treason:

That is the corpse of the former king, still holding his artifact copper spear (which apparently didn't help him much). Other deaths followed: barons and baronesses suffocating as their lungs were crushed from the brutal blows of their peers.
Seeing that I probably wouldn't find Baron Lokum, at least not alive, I just picked up a bunch of steel weapons and made off through the caverns.
Amusing as this may be, oughtn't it be classed as a bug? At least, I don't guess it's intended behavior to have every fortress visit result in a bloodbath over artifact claims...