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DF Community Games & Stories / Re: Talk about going stark raving mad...
« on: July 08, 2013, 10:16:34 pm »
Talk about eye candy
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DF General Discussion / Re: Weird weregiraffe
« on: June 16, 2013, 10:54:14 pm »My perception of the dorfiverse is shattered.That's weird because I only get necromancers when my embark is near a necromancer tower and I only get goblins when my embark is near goblins.
I remember once getting necromancers in my fortress after over a game year, at the exact moment that my first human caravan showed up. It seemed like the necromancers came with the traders. I was even told that when I posted on this forum, that they'll follow caravans in.
I don't know if the game just randomly decided to throw things at you. I'm pretty sure certain conditions have to be met for everything.
The game checks for immigrants, caravans, etc, at certain times per year, so quite often everything will come at once. AFAIK, of course.
On the embark screen, it will have to say 'tower' as a nearby civilisation for necromancers to come or send zombie sieges. Similarly, there must be a goblin civilisation within a reasonable distance of your fort to attack. Werebeasts are different - they act much like megabeasts, randomly attacking your fortress.
Why is it, then, that they always seem to come with migrant waves or caravans. Is it that they've been hanging around the map edge and I just haven't noticed it?
I know megabeasts travel but I was always under the impression you have to be near a were beast lair to get a were beast.
Like he said, the game checks for things like that at certain points of the year, so everyone the game decides to put on your map comes at once.
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DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: Building a new God
« on: June 15, 2013, 12:21:44 am »
We weren't made by Armok, it was the other way around.
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DF General Discussion / Re: surprised *spoilers*
« on: June 15, 2013, 12:18:18 am »I've never actually gotten a proper evil cloud. Just dizziness and pus syndromes.Godspeed, you short drunk idiot.
But no. I'm going to, once I have a proper foothold established, defeat the HFS using nothing but properly trained and armored dwarven militia. No engineering. No slave labor. Just steel armor and picks. Wish me luck.
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DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: Building a new God
« on: June 12, 2013, 09:15:20 pm »
Yes! Let us mess with the raws to test the resulting creatures!
Half-elf half-dwarfs!
Badger-sponges! create the best of both worlds!
Oh! Create a creature that spawns water and another of its species when it dies so you can create a death-fueled waterfall that brings food directly to you!
Half-elf half-dwarfs!
Badger-sponges! create the best of both worlds!
Oh! Create a creature that spawns water and another of its species when it dies so you can create a death-fueled waterfall that brings food directly to you!
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DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: Building a new God
« on: June 12, 2013, 06:59:39 pm »
The SCP Foundation will want to speak with you.
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DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: What's going on in your fort?
« on: April 21, 2013, 02:34:21 am »
The Draltha keep invading from the caverns. The past five times I have connected the floor of the caverns to the tunnels the entire herd of draltha in the caverns stop, turn around and start marching directly into my fort, murdering anyone they find.
Every time I think my millitary has the situation under control, EVERY SINGLE ONE starts to give birth to twins and triples, in the space of two seconds it went from five draltha to thirty five. And the children are even worse! They're like huge, fuzzy piranha! My expedition leader was turned into fifteen different pieces, with one of the draltha children biting his teeth and ripping them out like some sort of sociopathic dentist with a vacation in five minutes and can't be bothered to find the solitary cavity, so he just removes them all! Except with his mouth because he's crazy like that. One swordsdwarf had three taking turns pulling his limbs off like he was an ant. And the kicker? The moment they see daylight, they rush towards it like moths to a flame, only to be caught in cage traps, which they will starve to death in, because they killed everyone that could have freed them! So they accomplished nothing except brutilizing fifteen innocent (well, relatively innocent) dwarfs, and getting themselves killed.
WELCOME TO DWARF FORTRESS BITCH.
HOPE YOU LIKE MURDER.
Every time I think my millitary has the situation under control, EVERY SINGLE ONE starts to give birth to twins and triples, in the space of two seconds it went from five draltha to thirty five. And the children are even worse! They're like huge, fuzzy piranha! My expedition leader was turned into fifteen different pieces, with one of the draltha children biting his teeth and ripping them out like some sort of sociopathic dentist with a vacation in five minutes and can't be bothered to find the solitary cavity, so he just removes them all! Except with his mouth because he's crazy like that. One swordsdwarf had three taking turns pulling his limbs off like he was an ant. And the kicker? The moment they see daylight, they rush towards it like moths to a flame, only to be caught in cage traps, which they will starve to death in, because they killed everyone that could have freed them! So they accomplished nothing except brutilizing fifteen innocent (well, relatively innocent) dwarfs, and getting themselves killed.
WELCOME TO DWARF FORTRESS BITCH.
HOPE YOU LIKE MURDER.
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DF Community Games & Stories / Re: Illustrated Community Game
« on: February 15, 2013, 07:23:10 pm »
Ah wid like tae join this venture. I'll entrance t' lads with ma tales 'o ax-fightin' oan the high seas.
(Captain Bloke, Axedwarf/Pirate)
(Captain Bloke, Axedwarf/Pirate)
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DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: Serpent Woman Necromancer
« on: February 15, 2013, 05:18:16 pm »Sponge man necromancer. You know you want to.
Fool! Thou meddle with Darke forces thou does not even begin to understand! Toucheth not the Necromantic Porifera!
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DF General Discussion / Re: I beat the odds!
« on: February 10, 2013, 01:21:25 pm »
It all gets worse !!Fun!! from here.
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DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.
« on: February 10, 2013, 01:16:40 pm »
Dwarfs are good at getting... screwed.
Why will dwarfs always wander outside the fortress at the exact moment a siege begins?
Why will dwarfs always wander outside the fortress at the exact moment a siege begins?
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DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: Macabre and fell moods
« on: January 31, 2013, 07:51:32 pm »"I never liked the mayor anyway" said Urist McDrunk, Right before using the statue's hand as a mug holder.
Annnnnnd.... quoted.
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DF General Discussion / Re: What Would Urist Do?
« on: January 29, 2013, 10:47:57 pm »
Go on break.
WWUD if he was turned into a thrall?
WWUD if he was turned into a thrall?
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DF Dwarf Mode Discussion / Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« on: January 29, 2013, 12:36:38 pm »
Dear Urist Unit 273
I understand that life here can be frustrating at times. I understand that you like that spot, and it is one of the few things you have here that you can enjoy. But I must question the logic of standing outside the fort directly in front of the ballistae fortification as the the Goblin filth charged. Your remains will not be collected.
Your amused Overseer
Dear Berserk Urist Unit
Your anger is understood, what with your entire family killed by that Forgotten Beast. However, it would have been preferred if you had waited to go insane after you had passed our hammerer and put away your weapons. If it had been an equally armored enemy you had killed with one stab to the eyes, I would have rewarded you. Instead, I must commend your former comrade and new hammerer who was, at the time you did the deed, standing directly behind you for bisecting you in a similarly instant fashion. You will not be missed.
Your irritated Overseer
I understand that life here can be frustrating at times. I understand that you like that spot, and it is one of the few things you have here that you can enjoy. But I must question the logic of standing outside the fort directly in front of the ballistae fortification as the the Goblin filth charged. Your remains will not be collected.
Your amused Overseer
Dear Berserk Urist Unit
Your anger is understood, what with your entire family killed by that Forgotten Beast. However, it would have been preferred if you had waited to go insane after you had passed our hammerer and put away your weapons. If it had been an equally armored enemy you had killed with one stab to the eyes, I would have rewarded you. Instead, I must commend your former comrade and new hammerer who was, at the time you did the deed, standing directly behind you for bisecting you in a similarly instant fashion. You will not be missed.
Your irritated Overseer
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